Dumb question: I have a roommate that goes by "they." We just had a conversation where they were explaining their current troubles. Half of the time I was afraid to say too much because I felt like I was messing up their pronouns. If they go by "they," am I supposed to not use the word "you" when describing them. For instance if i were to say "I think YOU were right." Do I say "they" instead? Because then that sounds confusing and making it seem like I am agreeing with someone else's side and not "their" side. I hope that makes sense? And when someone uses "they" does that mean they identify as more than one person that makes up the whole or being "inside of them?" Really trying to understand and be supportive and it's difficult to break old habits!
hmmm hm uh no, there's only 2 genders so that why this issue is soooo muddled. having said that, we should be respectful using heuristics. we're all cis gender, you can't responsibly erase factual biology with soft-science pop psychology. one last admission, I might be responsible for toxic masculinity and femininity as a critical thinker, artist and fringe dweller. is there a "toxic" gender fluidity??? I never considered that till now! It seem like we're being forced to bend facts to fit the politic of this issue. I appreciate your point of view but felt I needed to tap the ball back over the net (terrible metaphor! sorry!!)
It's so true. Gender is complex and dynamic and, since we have just accepted the either / or and rigid boundaries of men and women in the past it's taking some learning and unlearning time right now. Thanks for watching!
How do we make statistics when genders are involved? New genders appear everyday it seems and that creates a problem if we are to address a statistic where gender is applied. An example could be a statistic covering Covid-19 cases involving gender. How will these be done now that we keep getting more and more genders? Or are everyone, when it comes to a statistic where gender is a factor still putting themselves into a male or female category based on the fact if the have a uterus or not?
You make such a great point, and I think what you're highlighting is the difference between sex and gender. I think science has shown us that we do have biological and physical differences within our bodies and we certainly need to understand statistics as it relates to the body. Our gender is how we live out our life, express ourselves, show up in the world. And I'm not sure if it's that new genders are appearing? Or that we recognize that we don't fit into one gender category. None of us actually do. Thank you for watching.
I have been reading or listening to every explanation i could find on using gender pronouns. I'm having a problem with WHEN to use the pronoun correctly. If I was in a conversation with you for example, your pronoun would never come up in the conversation when talking directly to you because i would not use he -she -they etc . Now if I was talking about you with someone else your pronoun would come up in conversation but you wouldn't know what pronoun i used because your not there. And lastly your pronoun might be used if you were part of a conversation with myself and another person if we talked about you in front of you. And if I shouldn't ASSUME to know what pronoun someone uses then I would have to find out the pronoun for every person I know and thousands/ millions of people I don't know so i can refer to them properly even tho they are not part of my conversation and may not even know about it. Am I missing something? I'm really trying to understand especially since the use of someones pronoun isn't always said in the persons presence.
You just hit the nail. The individuals that pay attention to this thing, in my opinion, should develop a thicker skin. They are totally free to believe whatever they want but I don’t think they should impose their beliefs to the rest of the humanity.
No. You’re not missing anything. This is an attempt to fundamentally change our use of grammar to indulge people’s beliefs. We address people in the second person when talking to them. The pronouns in question are third person pronouns. A person has no reason to be concerned about which pronouns that person is referred by if the person is not even there to hear it. One would only know about it if that person overhears a reference to oneself or is told about it afterward. In either case, the person is not directly engaged in the conversation. The system we have now is sufficient.
Well their is masculine and feminine two energy basically and everyone is mix of both. You can’t let your feelings dictate real world structure. There’s two bodies male or female and your physical body is extremely important in everything because that is what others can see as you. Accept your gender and then do wear live however you want. It’s not mistaken because it’s reality you’ll be either or because that’s the truth. Now talking about gender roles and toxicity that’s fair but there’s good in roles too and that’s totally different as it’s a social problem and needs education in treating people not making up made things to validate your personal feelings. It is also very sexist to categorize men and female which one does when they say they are neither as if men and women have some strict rules to follow enforcing gender roles. So even worse. Gender expression is not real because it’s just having a personality and liking things. Just having short hair and wearing a black leather jacket doesn’t change your gender but you can enjoy yourself without this in a healthy and respectful and honest way. Also wanting to be validated by everyone in all your feelings is not right. Gender can’t evolve in ones lifetime either. It has to set which it is from birth and maybe we’ll evolve into something else in far future but you having to evolve and grow in your psyche doesn’t mean the reality bends. I’ll use whatever pronouns one wants of course but we can’t just create whatever we feel and think when the world is a fixed place. Otherwise if you hold that mentality you’ll be only happy with those who won’t tell you the truth and just validate everything you say. Curious why it’s common among white first world people and mostly female girls always. Culture and indoctrination too much freedom to do as you wish you are secure and privileged to even think about it and making new inventions. Idk but curious
Dumb question: I have a roommate that goes by "they." We just had a conversation where they were explaining their current troubles. Half of the time I was afraid to say too much because I felt like I was messing up their pronouns. If they go by "they," am I supposed to not use the word "you" when describing them. For instance if i were to say "I think YOU were right." Do I say "they" instead? Because then that sounds confusing and making it seem like I am agreeing with someone else's side and not "their" side. I hope that makes sense? And when someone uses "they" does that mean they identify as more than one person that makes up the whole or being "inside of them?" Really trying to understand and be supportive and it's difficult to break old habits!
hmmm hm uh no, there's only 2 genders so that why this issue is soooo muddled. having said that, we should be respectful using heuristics. we're all cis gender,
you can't responsibly erase factual biology with soft-science pop psychology.
one last admission, I might be responsible for toxic masculinity and femininity as a critical thinker, artist and fringe dweller. is there a "toxic" gender fluidity??? I never considered that till now! It seem like we're being forced to bend facts to fit the politic of this issue. I appreciate your point of view but felt I needed to tap the ball back over the net (terrible metaphor! sorry!!)
The more explaining this requires, the more confusing it becomes.
This is intentional.
It's so true. Gender is complex and dynamic and, since we have just accepted the either / or and rigid boundaries of men and women in the past it's taking some learning and unlearning time right now. Thanks for watching!
I agree. It’s not coherent.
this is ridiculous. good luck with that..
How do we make statistics when genders are involved?
New genders appear everyday it seems and that creates a problem if we are to address a statistic where gender is applied. An example could be a statistic covering Covid-19 cases involving gender. How will these be done now that we keep getting more and more genders?
Or are everyone, when it comes to a statistic where gender is a factor still putting themselves into a male or female category based on the fact if the have a uterus or not?
You make such a great point, and I think what you're highlighting is the difference between sex and gender. I think science has shown us that we do have biological and physical differences within our bodies and we certainly need to understand statistics as it relates to the body. Our gender is how we live out our life, express ourselves, show up in the world. And I'm not sure if it's that new genders are appearing? Or that we recognize that we don't fit into one gender category. None of us actually do. Thank you for watching.
@@LorriSulpizio So the answer is yes then.
I have been reading or listening to every explanation i could find on using gender pronouns. I'm having a problem with WHEN to use the pronoun correctly. If I was in a conversation with you for example, your pronoun would never come up in the conversation when talking directly to you because i would not use he -she -they etc . Now if I was talking about you with someone else your pronoun would come up in conversation but you wouldn't know what pronoun i used because your not there. And lastly your pronoun might be used if you were part of a conversation with myself and another person if we talked about you in front of you. And if I shouldn't ASSUME to know what pronoun someone uses then I would have to find out the pronoun for every person I know and thousands/ millions of people I don't know so i can refer to them properly even tho they are not part of my conversation and may not even know about it. Am I missing something? I'm really trying to understand especially since the use of someones pronoun isn't always said in the persons presence.
You just hit the nail. The individuals that pay attention to this thing, in my opinion, should develop a thicker skin. They are totally free to believe whatever they want but I don’t think they should impose their beliefs to the rest of the humanity.
No. You’re not missing anything. This is an attempt to fundamentally change our use of grammar to indulge people’s beliefs. We address people in the second person when talking to them. The pronouns in question are third person pronouns. A person has no reason to be concerned about which pronouns that person is referred by if the person is not even there to hear it. One would only know about it if that person overhears a reference to oneself or is told about it afterward. In either case, the person is not directly engaged in the conversation. The system we have now is sufficient.
But people don’t use “they” for themselves; they use it for other people.
No. This delusion not only ruins the English language but infringes on everyone else. You all need to accept what you actually are.
Well their is masculine and feminine two energy basically and everyone is mix of both. You can’t let your feelings dictate real world structure. There’s two bodies male or female and your physical body is extremely important in everything because that is what others can see as you. Accept your gender and then do wear live however you want. It’s not mistaken because it’s reality you’ll be either or because that’s the truth.
Now talking about gender roles and toxicity that’s fair but there’s good in roles too and that’s totally different as it’s a social problem and needs education in treating people not making up made things to validate your personal feelings. It is also very sexist to categorize men and female which one does when they say they are neither as if men and women have some strict rules to follow enforcing gender roles. So even worse. Gender expression is not real because it’s just having a personality and liking things. Just having short hair and wearing a black leather jacket doesn’t change your gender but you can enjoy yourself without this in a healthy and respectful and honest way.
Also wanting to be validated by everyone in all your feelings is not right.
Gender can’t evolve in ones lifetime either. It has to set which it is from birth and maybe we’ll evolve into something else in far future but you having to evolve and grow in your psyche doesn’t mean the reality bends. I’ll use whatever pronouns one wants of course but we can’t just create whatever we feel and think when the world is a fixed place. Otherwise if you hold that mentality you’ll be only happy with those who won’t tell you the truth and just validate everything you say. Curious why it’s common among white first world people and mostly female girls always. Culture and indoctrination too much freedom to do as you wish you are secure and privileged to even think about it and making new inventions. Idk but curious
Such an important conversation! Loved hearing your perspective!
Glad you enjoyed it! Thank you for watching.
Is this serious? I thought it was joke.
This is incredible. I might not have ever needed to transition medically if it weren't for acceptance from the outside world.
please stop this - ok. if you can invent a word to use in place of how you are using 'they' , i will follow that rule.
Dr Sulpizio, I'm more curious what pronouns does your son use on you? Also, does he call you Mom or Dad or is there any other alternative words?