Totally you just fight for your beliefs. At the start of nofap i thought i was stressed thats why i reacted to stuff. After you spend more and more time to nofap you realise you just fight for what your heart believes.
Women like “bad boys” not because they are rude sometimes but because they are comfortable within their own skin. So be comfortable with who you are and to you greatness will come
also because they are honest and thus easier to deal with. One of the most important points of the "No More Mr Nice Guy" book was not to have "covert contracts", ie don't expect that just because you are being nice to someone, or nice to the world, that it will be nice in return. That rarely if ever works. You need to ask or negotiate for what you want
My brother is definitely not comfortable with himself, not anymore atleast and He used to have 3 "girlfriends" at times. He looks at women like they are objects and talks with them like with dogs. ( well, worse in fact, nobody rly talks rude with dogs ) I think, they indeed only like rude people and, if not, how does being a jerk not counterweight the "comfortable" part? A small positive for a big negative.
Some of it is them wanting to "change" him. This is the result of some very bad codependent relationships, thinking that if you just stick with it that they'll finally see what a terrible person they're being and pull a 180.
Quiero Motivarte no one is a prize FYI! The real shit is mutual. Stop the male entitlement bullshit FFS! You boys been doing that since your childhood. Grow the fuck up!😂
Lucifer K people throw the word triggered these days very easily when someone calls on somebody’s bullshit🤣 grow up ..again! And i see u just looking to pick some arguments on the internet. Go find someone else.
@@basicbase749 I think the "I am the prize" mentality is really a psycho trick to overcome low self esteem quickly but not sustainably. It's like a field med kit (telling you from the insights of my keyboard warrior expertise here ;)
Volvox lol.. i know.. I understand this quite well after dealing with such men many times, otherwise I wouldn’t be here talking about it. The real problem with the prize mentality of fake nice guys is, if rejected, they never realize how quickly they go from a “nice guy” to a nasty guy, who starts abusing at the girl, calls the same girl a slut(whom be seemed to like, just 5 minutes ago) for hearing a No from her, and he usually ends the argument with “it’s your loss, that you cannot be with me”🤣 . In short, they handle rejections in life, like a toddler
Bob Smith though, there is one thing you need to understand if you start dating (again?). Being a nice guy and fully interested and starting the conversation (ex. texting) over and over and questioning to get to know her, because you are genuinely interested will get you nowhere with 90% of the women when you are still in the dating phase. You have to take a step back and make her want you, not show your weaknesses, don’t act too interested at all times of the day, cut the texting off when you should go to sleep etc. Eventhough you WANT to keep giving and get to know someone, it will turn girls down. They always want what is harder or kind of hard to get, in this phase. I experienced it once again, keep the game up until you are in a relationship at least.
@@j.l.4698 Its a path many were literally raised not to walk, or, not in a healthy constructive way, and done so at critical development stages. When people first learn how to first recognise they have needs and to start to, for the first times want to answer those needs for themselves is between 3-5ish. Before then, they just piss shit and cry for someone to feed them and sort out the mess for them; none of that is about recognising much or wanting to act for themselves. When its that universal through society, there is something systemically wrong.
Man... I really needed this. A friend of mine has been explaining this to me recently and telling me I need to break this habit. And honestly, even I was opposed to the idea of "nice guys finish last", but you made it so clear for me, so thank you so much, Nikhil. It really means a lot.
I love how this video distinguishes itself from most of the other “motivational” videos out there, that tell you to “just be yourself”. This is ten times clearer, thank you.
@@norwit1162 Both woman and man have feminin and maskulin "energies". That releated to aggresivity (sometimes in form of violence), for example, has to do with maskulin energies, and this manifest in both woman and man.
If someone is being a "nice guy", it itself means that he is seeking validation from others. He is suppressing himself for the appreciation of being a "nice guy". This form of seeking validation is even more dangerous because you are suppressing yourself, your masculinity, your confidence and your thoughts for being a "nice guy" in front of others.
and what if my dad is this. im a boy (24) still have anxious feelings, my dad always seek validation from me and my sister. everything he said he need validation. it's so fucking anoying... im programmed to react on a way to make him feel good..
I am a nice guy, not for validation, but, because I know what It is to be hurt. My father is an alcoholist and I had a horrible childhood with lot of physcal violence and emotional manipulation. I took my family as a bad example and, so I became a people pleaser. I am not a simp though and I still recognize my own needs, but I am just not selfish. What is life, If you only live for yourself? I am always here for myself, others are not, therefore I want others, I want others to be happy and I want others to be happy, as I have all the time with myself, time spent alone is not special, you always have the choice to be alone, but not always do you have the choice to be with others and help others. I might be arrogant, but I do believe I am genuinely a nice person who doesnt want to hurt others, but I might be mistaken to be a "nice guy" simp, people pleaser who doesnt respect himself. But in fact, I am kind, because I respect myself and I want to be a person I am not ashamed of, I want to be better and I want to be altruistic, not a selfish jerk. People do tend to like me very easly, they like me, but nobody ever really loves me. Its as, if I am a side character that people like to be around, but nobody really cares about. I guess, I am too easy and not just in romantic relationships, but in all relationships, people like drama and challange and they dont get that from me.
I used to be a nice girl. But not anymore. I often suffered coz of my niceness. Especially when I used to be nice to people who didn’t deserve it. I put my priorities and emotions first now.
I can certainly relate the this. Wish I had learned this in my younger years. By the way I am 41 year old new immigrant in the usa. I just found your channel and started watching right in the morning to give myself much needed positivity and wisdom. I have grown matured and wise over the years but as they say it’s a never ending process so I keep learning about myself and the world around me. I am happy that I got so much to learn and appreciate from your videos. Cheers.
Oh God no, DO NOT BE LIKE OTHER TH-camRS. WE DESPERATELY NEED YOUR GOOFINESS, SILLINESS, AND LIGHT-HEARTEDNESS. AND YOUR HONESTY AND OWNERSHIP OF YOUR "FLAWS". This channel is awesome for many reasons not least of which is the fact that so many of the other TH-camrs you cover don't have that and although useful need a good laugh at themselves. This channel is a great distillation of the answers and wisdom out there but also does it with fun and a soul. Total breath of fresh air. Capt. Sinbad rocks! 😁
Actually I am practising every thing you told in your videos. Practically every thing , yes i am feeling the change within me.😊💐 Thank you and Gratitude.
George Costanza "every decision I have ever made in my life has been wrong" ....Big fan And also he won the challenge "he is the master of his domain" That was the great episode of Seinfeld
This is pretty interesting to me, whenever I try to be authentic and step up for myself or people I care about, suddenly everything in my surroundings change, drastically, so much that I'm left numbfounded only analyzing the disadvantages of my behavior and deciding whether or not it benefited me in the first place. At this point of my life it has become more tiring for me to "try hard" to be "authentic" than faking perfect manners, and I'm also confused of what's authentic in me, the disappointment in people's eyes whenever I don't meet their expectations is tiresome!. I'm trying to improve this in myself because I know now this whole "disappointment reaction, drastic changes in my surroundings" are just excuses/scripts I made up, and that's what is so interesting to me, this bunch of stories we tell to ourselves unconsciously. Now I know it doesn't matter how I hard I try, those external results will never take place UNLESS I make the changes in my inner world, and I'm not talking about wishing for more external acceptance but in fact to stop wanting it. I really like this videos!
Never expected the "goofy guy" making super over the top parody videos of people would end up being such a source of positivity and usefulness. I'm glad I saw the other side of the coin, and I'm not trying to devaluate the comedy, it's clearly popular for a lot of people, but this will change many people for the better. Massive props.
I like the idea that imperfections connect us. You’re right though, not putting our own needs as a priority only degrades our value. I think it’s important to be able to say no and not feel like a total jerk... being a “nice guy” and saying yes all the time even when it’s to our own detriment isn’t the way. Thanks for this message Nikhil! 💚🐝
I appreciate your videos very much. I feel relieved there are smart, fair minded, insightful, open minded young men in your generation. Cuz my generation X and my boomer parents suck. Keep it up.
The point that hit me directly was "nice guys act needless". Quite embarrassingly, I did the same thing 3 years ago. And that really messed my life up real quick. Almost like an avalanche. Guys, if you think you *need* something (mind that word need, not greed), then that's it. Go work for it, and don't be afraid to bite the iron. Nobody will save you. It's your responsibility. And the best point which summaries all of that, do NOT wait, or expect for any kind of social approval. That will hold you back. And yeah, on the same note, if you think you can't do something at that moment (because you might be tired, busy etc.), Don't hesitate to say no. A good person will understand your situation. If even after your denial, a person keeps pestering you, leave them. In 95% of cases, chances are that person is just trying to manipulate you.
Your videos are making a dent in how I (and many others) precieve the outside and inside world, I can’t thank you enough for your endeavors in sharing your experience.
Funny how times have changed. I read about Giacomo Casanova and he kind of fits the "nice guy" portrait. "Feeling that I was born for the sex opposite of mine, I have always loved it and done all that I could to make myself loved by it." "There is no honest woman with an uncorrupted heart whom a man is not sure of conquering by dint of gratitude. It is one of the surest and shortest means." "Alcohol and violence, for him, were not proper tools of seduction. Instead, attentiveness and small favors should be employed to soften a woman's heart" I have just ended an year long long distance relationship yesterday (she ended it) and was accused for being a "nice guy". While I do agree on the part that you shouldn't be "nice" for the sole purpose to be a people pleaser and out of fear that your true self is going to be judged, I don't see anything wrong in being nice and willing to make sacrifices and to step back, if you genuinely value and care for the opposite person. During this one year, I started my own business, so I could move in her country and have an independent stream of income. For the last month things started rolling and during my most successful day, I made 1/3 of my monthly salary on my 9 to 5 job in a single day. But it seems like being responsible, starting a business and investing in your long term happiness is not considered masculine nowadays. What's considered masculine is your sweaty, needy, playing hard to get fuccboi attitude. It's like while I was taking care of OUR future, I got dumped, so she can get pounded by fucboi in a tracksuit that he bought with his parent's money, just because he's playing hard to get and stuff like that. And she had the nerve to tell me that "some people are complicated nowadays and they don't want commitment"... not wanting commitment is the opposite of complicated - that's being basic. Animals are driven by their basic instincts and that's why they try to mate with as many partners. Working on a stable relationship and choosing your long term happiness over momentary sparks of excitement is complicated. Call me a "nice guy" if you want, but I feel like the world is going backwards nowadays. I feel like all those stupid traits are being valued, while the real values of people are being looked down upon
Yes, this has been me for my whole life. I am the rare advocate by personality type, and it has ruled my whole life. I have only recently been putting up walls and boundaries. i cannot keep giving when there is nothing left to give.
Fantastic video! This gave me the confidence to comment on the fact that I am currently still a nice guy (and self centred, apparently) but am working on changing that by not worrying about the expectations of others. To anyone who is waking up to their shortcomings, my advice is to not let the things people say influence your feelings and actions. Once you are aware of your path, nothing can stop you
somebody be rocking that moment case setup dough! May be a year behind sked here, but really like this one CS -> solid argue and poignant insight for sure!
Oh wow, you made me realize that I AM a Nice Girl :( Thanks, gotta work on this! Btw, the very reason I am now a subscriber is because you embrace your goofy side. It does feel authentic, not forced, so the rest of what you say gain credibility as well.
This has been probably the most important video!!! I used to suffer as a nice guy and since I’ve become more in nature and meditating etc. I’ve found this out as well and this is amazing to see you talk about it so perfectly!!!!! Damn Nikhil you the shit!
I'm happy that you are embracing what you see as your imperfections, it makes you seem more authentic and easier to connect with. There is nothing new, everyone is teaching their interpretations of ancient wisdom and it comes down to each person's connection with the teacher whether they get the message or not. There are definitely lots of people who would rather hear the same message from you than from even someone you look up to based on their connection to you. I love your channel. Keep putting yourself out there. You're really helping a lot of people.
Its really nice to see the goofy side of yours bro..but I always try to control mine y'know , I've been always taught its less masculine or immature. ..what do you think? ?
Owen and his entire team helped alot of us get out of our shells Justin Marc, David bond, Austin summers, Valentino, Spencer Cornelia are great examples of people living in authenticity and even you, seeing you transform as well has been amazing buddy, keep pumping these videos out, your target audience is a billion just from one country haha
I sat down to watch this video by title and was planning to eviscerate it . But ..... I actually agree with this . I’m on an almost 50 year long mission to prove that nice guys CAN finish first . (I’m totally winning right now , BTW ) . The workout thing is more important than I gave it credit . Maybe that’s why I get away with being a nice guy . I’ve been a power lifter for decades . Whatever it is , being a nice guy has worked out awesome for me .
Hey Nikhil, I think it's just about being yourself. Good bad ugly.. it's all about the mix. We have to Fake it at work place for the job. We have to manage our behavior with family. It's only around are close friends that we truly be ourselves the feeling about not being judged. And the last when we are alone we just are with our thoughts our dreams. So I guess it's about playing different parts in the same life. Your video .. too good. Keep going bro..
I resonate with a lot of things you said. Especially the stuff like when u get something,u feel like do I deserve this and I become overwhelmed sometimes when I get what I want . I think working out has boosted my self confidence in that regard. Great video man again From another Indian bro 🙏
Good Stuff. Its all about Letting Go. Let go of the need to impress other people. Let go of the fear of offending people. Let go of the urge to look good, to not make mistakes. Let go
Yea needs and wants are sometimes different. Top needs are: breath, animal fat (for nourishment) shelter, water, and relationships. Meet your needs and what you want will happen. Nice vid, Cheers
So much apt video for me. I am very nice to people that they often take me for granted. This is an eye opener to me. About point 3 it definitely rings bells, I always like to build a strong body but never did any exercise nor played any sport because I somehow thought it would be arrogant of me to use that much time on myself rather than spending with my family or my friends. I am going to read this book for sure .
Awesome video man! And you're spot on. I'm also more of a joking/fun loving person, so your videos that were a little more intense felt sort of awkward. Almost like I could tell it wasnt you. But I think lately you do a good job at taking serious topics and adding your true personality to them which is enjoyable. What's life without some joy anyway.
Lol, I just watched your new video today, too, and you touched on a few of the same principles as you did here. That tells me that this book is somewhat a foundational book for self-improvement topics
You can't give back if your cup is not overflowing - what a perspective...that's 101 !! Thanks for this I guess 102 would be to demand universe to overflow our cups exponentially, but only if we cultivate the intent of giving back!
Lmao at the impression. I recognized it immediately. If it means anything, I would much rather hang out with “goofy” you than any of the other youtubers. You seem charismatic and fun....rather than a try hard. So maybe trying to act super tough isn’t always the way to go.
Capt. Sinbad - can you do a video on assertiveness training? I learned that in a communication class and it was a huge concept. So much of the "nice guy" (and nice girl) complaints are due to a person's incorrect / ineffective lack of assertiveness. Too assertive is too aggressive and unnecessarily rude. Not assertive enough and they'll walk all over you (or it can be pathetic passive aggressiveness that might get results but not respect). Just the right level of assertiveness gets your message across effectively while respecting yourself AND others.
When you mentioned RSDTyler, I flinched my head like whaat? Fuck it is uncanny how similar our live journeys are... and I bet a lot of guys subscribed to you.
![[Full Episode] The Restaurant War Thailand ศึกพ่อค้าซ่าแม่ค้าแซ่บ Episode 3 | 6 ต.ค. 67](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/fTfIMFVjt_8/mqdefault.jpg)
"You dont need to be polish all the time"
Cries in Poland
hahahaha
@@CaptainSinbad Senpai noticed me *,,,*
@@calhares what's a Senpai
@@yushpi a teacher
I feel personally offended :'(
I feel like nofap itself kills the nice guy within you
Totally you just fight for your beliefs. At the start of nofap i thought i was stressed thats why i reacted to stuff. After you spend more and more time to nofap you realise you just fight for what your heart believes.
I agree
so fuckin true ..
Ya bro I feel same
@@shutitdown656 you are bullshit
Women like “bad boys” not because they are rude sometimes but because they are comfortable within their own skin. So be comfortable with who you are and to you greatness will come
also because they are honest and thus easier to deal with. One of the most important points of the "No More Mr Nice Guy" book was not to have "covert contracts", ie don't expect that just because you are being nice to someone, or nice to the world, that it will be nice in return. That rarely if ever works. You need to ask or negotiate for what you want
My brother is definitely not comfortable with himself, not anymore atleast and He used to have 3 "girlfriends" at times. He looks at women like they are objects and talks with them like with dogs. ( well, worse in fact, nobody rly talks rude with dogs ) I think, they indeed only like rude people and, if not, how does being a jerk not counterweight the "comfortable" part? A small positive for a big negative.
@@MMOplayeerr I don't know, women are complicated people, I just don't bother with them at all anymore and just try to improve myself for my own sake.
Some of it is them wanting to "change" him. This is the result of some very bad codependent relationships, thinking that if you just stick with it that they'll finally see what a terrible person they're being and pull a 180.
No that’s not why they like bad boys it’s because of the cultural fantasy nothing more or less
Never think a woman is doing you a favor by being with you, you are the prize!
Quiero Motivarte no one is a prize FYI! The real shit is mutual. Stop the male entitlement bullshit FFS! You boys been doing that since your childhood. Grow the fuck up!😂
Yes :)
Lucifer K people throw the word triggered these days very easily when someone calls on somebody’s bullshit🤣 grow up ..again! And i see u just looking to pick some arguments on the internet. Go find someone else.
@@basicbase749 I think the "I am the prize" mentality is really a psycho trick to overcome low self esteem quickly but not sustainably. It's like a field med kit (telling you from the insights of my keyboard warrior expertise here ;)
Volvox lol.. i know.. I understand this quite well after dealing with such men many times, otherwise I wouldn’t be here talking about it. The real problem with the prize mentality of fake nice guys is, if rejected, they never realize how quickly they go from a “nice guy” to a nasty guy, who starts abusing at the girl, calls the same girl a slut(whom be seemed to like, just 5 minutes ago) for hearing a No from her, and he usually ends the argument with “it’s your loss, that you cannot be with me”🤣 . In short, they handle rejections in life, like a toddler
The sad cliche we've all heard before "Nice guys finish last" is unfortunately true.
Bob Smith though, there is one thing you need to understand if you start dating (again?). Being a nice guy and fully interested and starting the conversation (ex. texting) over and over and questioning to get to know her, because you are genuinely interested will get you nowhere with 90% of the women when you are still in the dating phase. You have to take a step back and make her want you, not show your weaknesses, don’t act too interested at all times of the day, cut the texting off when you should go to sleep etc. Eventhough you WANT to keep giving and get to know someone, it will turn girls down. They always want what is harder or kind of hard to get, in this phase. I experienced it once again, keep the game up until you are in a relationship at least.
Bob Smith I’m a nice guy by nature but society is fucked up, so we got to roll with it.
@@j.l.4698 Its a path many were literally raised not to walk, or, not in a healthy constructive way, and done so at critical development stages. When people first learn how to first recognise they have needs and to start to, for the first times want to answer those needs for themselves is between 3-5ish. Before then, they just piss shit and cry for someone to feed them and sort out the mess for them; none of that is about recognising much or wanting to act for themselves. When its that universal through society, there is something systemically wrong.
Actually, it is not. Nice guys don't finish last, they are not even in the race.
Swift Eagle bahaha!
Man... I really needed this. A friend of mine has been explaining this to me recently and telling me I need to break this habit. And honestly, even I was opposed to the idea of "nice guys finish last", but you made it so clear for me, so thank you so much, Nikhil. It really means a lot.
Don't give up thank you Fatima!
I love how this video distinguishes itself from most of the other “motivational” videos out there, that tell you to “just be yourself”. This is ten times clearer, thank you.
Lol, aren't you a woman?
@@norwit1162 Both woman and man have feminin and maskulin "energies". That releated to aggresivity (sometimes in form of violence), for example, has to do with maskulin energies, and this manifest in both woman and man.
If someone is being a "nice guy", it itself means that he is seeking validation from others. He is suppressing himself for the appreciation of being a "nice guy".
This form of seeking validation is even more dangerous because you are suppressing yourself, your masculinity, your confidence and your thoughts for being a "nice guy" in front of others.
Gaurav Singh thank God!!! Some guy understands this atleast 😂😂
and what if my dad is this. im a boy (24) still have anxious feelings, my dad always seek validation from me and my sister. everything he said he need validation. it's so fucking anoying... im programmed to react on a way to make him feel good..
I am a nice guy, not for validation, but, because I know what It is to be hurt. My father is an alcoholist and I had a horrible childhood with lot of physcal violence and emotional manipulation. I took my family as a bad example and, so I became a people pleaser. I am not a simp though and I still recognize my own needs, but I am just not selfish. What is life, If you only live for yourself? I am always here for myself, others are not, therefore I want others, I want others to be happy and I want others to be happy, as I have all the time with myself, time spent alone is not special, you always have the choice to be alone, but not always do you have the choice to be with others and help others.
I might be arrogant, but I do believe I am genuinely a nice person who doesnt want to hurt others, but I might be mistaken to be a "nice guy" simp, people pleaser who doesnt respect himself.
But in fact, I am kind, because I respect myself and I want to be a person I am not ashamed of, I want to be better and I want to be altruistic, not a selfish jerk. People do tend to like me very easly, they like me, but nobody ever really loves me. Its as, if I am a side character that people like to be around, but nobody really cares about. I guess, I am too easy and not just in romantic relationships, but in all relationships, people like drama and challange and they dont get that from me.
*_LOL that's the NoFap King of TH-cam_*
I used to be a nice girl. But not anymore. I often suffered coz of my niceness. Especially when I used to be nice to people who didn’t deserve it. I put my priorities and emotions first now.
It's not an easy thing to do, and sometimes feels rude/selfish. I'm dealing with this now.
Congrats on turning it around!
I can certainly relate the this. Wish I had learned this in my younger years. By the way I am 41 year old new immigrant in the usa. I just found your channel and started watching right in the morning to give myself much needed positivity and wisdom. I have grown matured and wise over the years but as they say it’s a never ending process so I keep learning about myself and the world around me. I am happy that I got so much to learn and appreciate from your videos. Cheers.
Hope everything is going well for you in America. It's a little late, but welcome. :)
Nice shift towards motivational and self help. We want more on this genre sir. Regards
@Celtic Revival / Adfywiad Celtaidd meaning?
Damn man, you're glowing up as a youtuber. The last few videos are you really coming into your own with your originality toward this content
Become the character, don’t just mimic the character.
Oh God no, DO NOT BE LIKE OTHER TH-camRS. WE DESPERATELY NEED YOUR GOOFINESS, SILLINESS, AND LIGHT-HEARTEDNESS. AND YOUR HONESTY AND OWNERSHIP OF YOUR "FLAWS". This channel is awesome for many reasons not least of which is the fact that so many of the other TH-camrs you cover don't have that and although useful need a good laugh at themselves. This channel is a great distillation of the answers and wisdom out there but also does it with fun and a soul. Total breath of fresh air. Capt. Sinbad rocks! 😁
Greatest video on the subject. Honestly. I’ve seen quite a few, but this is the apex.
thanks man
Actually I am practising every thing you told in your videos. Practically every thing , yes i am feeling the change within me.😊💐 Thank you and Gratitude.
George Costanza "every decision I have ever made in my life has been wrong" ....Big fan
And also he won the challenge "he is the master of his domain" That was the great episode of Seinfeld
Didn't George admit that he had cheated in the contest during the plane scene in the last episode?
Guess that was also a wrong decision.
@@luccafortestoledo1300 yes
Actually, he lied about winning.
Another good book is "Living With a SEAL" by Jesse Itzler. It's a funny book, too.
This is pretty interesting to me, whenever I try to be authentic and step up for myself or people I care about, suddenly everything in my surroundings change, drastically, so much that I'm left numbfounded only analyzing the disadvantages of my behavior and deciding whether or not it benefited me in the first place. At this point of my life it has become more tiring for me to "try hard" to be "authentic" than faking perfect manners, and I'm also confused of what's authentic in me, the disappointment in people's eyes whenever I don't meet their expectations is tiresome!. I'm trying to improve this in myself because I know now this whole "disappointment reaction, drastic changes in my surroundings" are just excuses/scripts I made up, and that's what is so interesting to me, this bunch of stories we tell to ourselves unconsciously. Now I know it doesn't matter how I hard I try, those external results will never take place UNLESS I make the changes in my inner world, and I'm not talking about wishing for more external acceptance but in fact to stop wanting it. I really like this videos!
Never expected the "goofy guy" making super over the top parody videos of people would end up being such a source of positivity and usefulness. I'm glad I saw the other side of the coin, and I'm not trying to devaluate the comedy, it's clearly popular for a lot of people, but this will change many people for the better. Massive props.
I like the idea that imperfections connect us. You’re right though, not putting our own needs as a priority only degrades our value. I think it’s important to be able to say no and not feel like a total jerk... being a “nice guy” and saying yes all the time even when it’s to our own detriment isn’t the way. Thanks for this message Nikhil! 💚🐝
Damn. Your just king. Remember my message few weeks/days ago when I first discovered you? Awesome channel. Always changing my mind
I appreciate your videos very much. I feel relieved there are smart, fair minded, insightful, open minded young men in your generation. Cuz my generation X and my boomer parents suck. Keep it up.
The point that hit me directly was "nice guys act needless". Quite embarrassingly, I did the same thing 3 years ago. And that really messed my life up real quick. Almost like an avalanche. Guys, if you think you *need* something (mind that word need, not greed), then that's it. Go work for it, and don't be afraid to bite the iron. Nobody will save you. It's your responsibility. And the best point which summaries all of that, do NOT wait, or expect for any kind of social approval. That will hold you back.
And yeah, on the same note, if you think you can't do something at that moment (because you might be tired, busy etc.), Don't hesitate to say no. A good person will understand your situation. If even after your denial, a person keeps pestering you, leave them. In 95% of cases, chances are that person is just trying to manipulate you.
Your videos are making a dent in how I (and many others) precieve the outside and inside world, I can’t thank you enough for your endeavors in sharing your experience.
Funny how times have changed. I read about Giacomo Casanova and he kind of fits the "nice guy" portrait. "Feeling that I was born for the sex opposite of mine, I have always loved it and done all that I could to make myself loved by it." "There is no honest woman with an uncorrupted heart whom a man is not sure of conquering by dint of gratitude. It is one of the surest and shortest means." "Alcohol and violence, for him, were not proper tools of seduction. Instead, attentiveness and small favors should be employed to soften a woman's heart"
I have just ended an year long long distance relationship yesterday (she ended it) and was accused for being a "nice guy". While I do agree on the part that you shouldn't be "nice" for the sole purpose to be a people pleaser and out of fear that your true self is going to be judged, I don't see anything wrong in being nice and willing to make sacrifices and to step back, if you genuinely value and care for the opposite person.
During this one year, I started my own business, so I could move in her country and have an independent stream of income. For the last month things started rolling and during my most successful day, I made 1/3 of my monthly salary on my 9 to 5 job in a single day. But it seems like being responsible, starting a business and investing in your long term happiness is not considered masculine nowadays. What's considered masculine is your sweaty, needy, playing hard to get fuccboi attitude. It's like while I was taking care of OUR future, I got dumped, so she can get pounded by fucboi in a tracksuit that he bought with his parent's money, just because he's playing hard to get and stuff like that.
And she had the nerve to tell me that "some people are complicated nowadays and they don't want commitment"... not wanting commitment is the opposite of complicated - that's being basic. Animals are driven by their basic instincts and that's why they try to mate with as many partners. Working on a stable relationship and choosing your long term happiness over momentary sparks of excitement is complicated.
Call me a "nice guy" if you want, but I feel like the world is going backwards nowadays. I feel like all those stupid traits are being valued, while the real values of people are being looked down upon
You look very energized men, a lot more !! Great video
Watching from Nepal ... lots of love to you Sir
Nepal is the whole world bro
PLEASE specify
Superb.
Be open with others and yourself.
Thanks so much for this! Keep this gold coming!
Yes, this has been me for my whole life. I am the rare advocate by personality type, and it has ruled my whole life. I have only recently been putting up walls and boundaries. i cannot keep giving when there is nothing left to give.
You are such a great guy! You are doing really good work! Thanks for being you! And I say greatness is already there :) thanks mate!
"I'm all fucked up and I make it look good"
-Corey Taylor
Fantastic video! This gave me the confidence to comment on the fact that I am currently still a nice guy (and self centred, apparently) but am working on changing that by not worrying about the expectations of others. To anyone who is waking up to their shortcomings, my advice is to not let the things people say influence your feelings and actions. Once you are aware of your path, nothing can stop you
Aanghel!?!?
I was thinking the same
This was extremely hilarious 😂
@@The25soumitra Wow a women also watches our nofap brother
HEY! Stop trolling my Bro. Lol!
@@The25soumitra Hi Soumitra, tell me something. Are you lost? It's rare to see a woman in this neighbourhood.
somebody be rocking that moment case setup dough! May be a year behind sked here, but really like this one CS -> solid argue and poignant insight for sure!
Oh wow, you made me realize that I AM a Nice Girl :( Thanks, gotta work on this!
Btw, the very reason I am now a subscriber is because you embrace your goofy side. It does feel authentic, not forced, so the rest of what you say gain credibility as well.
As usual extraordinary concept with excellent anchor... Greatness is coming... Bravo
Great content, thanks for sharing dude
This has been probably the most important video!!! I used to suffer as a nice guy and since I’ve become more in nature and meditating etc. I’ve found this out as well and this is amazing to see you talk about it so perfectly!!!!! Damn Nikhil you the shit!
I'm happy that you are embracing what you see as your imperfections, it makes you seem more authentic and easier to connect with.
There is nothing new, everyone is teaching their interpretations of ancient wisdom and it comes down to each person's connection with the teacher whether they get the message or not.
There are definitely lots of people who would rather hear the same message from you than from even someone you look up to based on their connection to you.
I love your channel. Keep putting yourself out there. You're really helping a lot of people.
0:01 A Good TH-camr impersonating another Good TH-camr..
we all have our inspirations
Nice video man... Specially the cinematics and the impersonation.
Its really nice to see the goofy side of yours bro..but I always try to control mine y'know , I've been always taught its less masculine or immature. ..what do you think? ?
I think perhaps it is less masculine in some ways, but that's okay.
Generally you want to stay in a masculine frame 80/20 rule
I think being goofy lends boyish charm. Masculine as well, but less disagreeable. Which is very attractive :)
You stop being nice and start being authentic. That line struck hard. :)
Oh I think I would like the imperfect “real you” that you are describing even more.
Owen and his entire team helped alot of us get out of our shells Justin Marc, David bond, Austin summers, Valentino, Spencer Cornelia are great examples of people living in authenticity and even you, seeing you transform as well has been amazing buddy, keep pumping these videos out, your target audience is a billion just from one country haha
You're a real salesman! This video is great proof of that
Some men fool themselves thinking they are the nice guy and Could be The MONSTER
No men are nice guys, same as no woman is really nice either. All humans are trash. Avoid relationships.
Hey! You talking about Walter white😂😂
The beginning "time to go deep inside, aiiight" reminds me of Russell Wilson when he tries too hard to be hard haha
I sat down to watch this video by title and was planning to eviscerate it .
But .....
I actually agree with this . I’m on an almost 50 year long mission to prove that nice guys CAN finish first . (I’m totally winning right now , BTW ) .
The workout thing is more important than I gave it credit . Maybe that’s why I get away with being a nice guy . I’ve been a power lifter for decades .
Whatever it is , being a nice guy has worked out awesome for me .
Hey Nikhil,
I think it's just about being yourself. Good bad ugly.. it's all about the mix. We have to Fake it at work place for the job. We have to manage our behavior with family. It's only around are close friends that we truly be ourselves the feeling about not being judged. And the last when we are alone we just are with our thoughts our dreams.
So I guess it's about playing different parts in the same life.
Your video .. too good.
Keep going bro..
Lolol the Aanghel intro
Can't think your way out of it... That speaks to me
Something I remember that I liked from that book was the advice to hang out with other guys. There are many reasons why that would help.
This just might be the best video from you..
Loved the brief "Watches aanghel once" in the intro haha!
I resonate with a lot of things you said. Especially the stuff like when u get something,u feel like do I deserve this and I become overwhelmed sometimes when I get what I want . I think working out has boosted my self confidence in that regard. Great video man again
From another Indian bro
🙏
Make my needs a priority. Learn to receive.
Good Stuff. Its all about Letting Go.
Let go of the need to impress other people. Let go of the fear of offending people. Let go of the urge to look good, to not make mistakes.
Let go
"Greatness is coming..."
"...And so is DEATH!"
Awesome videos, thank you for the inspiration. :)
3:45 Just what I was thinking, thanks for putting a light on it!
"Master of your domain"
I see what you did there
Yea needs and wants are sometimes different. Top needs are: breath, animal fat (for nourishment) shelter, water, and relationships. Meet your needs and what you want will happen. Nice vid, Cheers
Even I suffered from this syndrome. Thanks for addressing this issue
So much apt video for me. I am very nice to people that they often take me for granted. This is an eye opener to me. About point 3 it definitely rings bells, I always like to build a strong body but never did any exercise nor played any sport because I somehow thought it would be arrogant of me to use that much time on myself rather than spending with my family or my friends. I am going to read this book for sure .
George Costanza is definitely not a nice guy. Great video as always.
Awesome video man! And you're spot on. I'm also more of a joking/fun loving person, so your videos that were a little more intense felt sort of awkward. Almost like I could tell it wasnt you. But I think lately you do a good job at taking serious topics and adding your true personality to them which is enjoyable. What's life without some joy anyway.
This is the best video so far! 🤯🤯🤯💥💥💥💪💪💪
yo this video is lit ! I really like this style of video , hope you keep the style for the rest of the video from here !
“Have to stop putting junks in their bodies and train them” I love how he represents his body with them.
Lol, I just watched your new video today, too, and you touched on a few of the same principles as you did here. That tells me that this book is somewhat a foundational book for self-improvement topics
aanghel
EXCUSE YOU. Being silly is not an imperfection, I admire you for that!
i was literally just thinking of that episode of Seinfeld recently and this popped in my feed. thanks for reading my mind
Man, you are seriously changing my life. Thank you.
Sincerity...i believe in that.
That getting uncomfortable thing is so true
You can't give back if your cup is not overflowing - what a perspective...that's 101 !! Thanks for this
I guess 102 would be to demand universe to overflow our cups exponentially, but only if we cultivate the intent of giving back!
Good shit man. Love your channel.
Lmao at the impression. I recognized it immediately.
If it means anything, I would much rather hang out with “goofy” you than any of the other youtubers. You seem charismatic and fun....rather than a try hard. So maybe trying to act super tough isn’t always the way to go.
Paul J I’m glad you think so Paul
Capt. Sinbad - can you do a video on assertiveness training? I learned that in a communication class and it was a huge concept. So much of the "nice guy" (and nice girl) complaints are due to a person's incorrect / ineffective lack of assertiveness. Too assertive is too aggressive and unnecessarily rude. Not assertive enough and they'll walk all over you (or it can be pathetic passive aggressiveness that might get results but not respect). Just the right level of assertiveness gets your message across effectively while respecting yourself AND others.
this guy spitting some truth here 🙏
I needed this. Thanks !
Keep motivating !!! Keep Growing !!!
So great! Love your channel!
Great content man. Already glad I subscribed.
Excellent episode
When you mentioned RSDTyler, I flinched my head like whaat? Fuck it is uncanny how similar our live journeys are... and I bet a lot of guys subscribed to you.
This was a really great vid bro. I'm inspired to the that leap💪
My favorite TH-camr incarnate my other favorite TH-camr, DAAAMN
the opposite was my alltime-favorite episode of seinfeld. thank you for reminding me.
Watching your and aanghel's videos totally bliss me out everytime ......☺️
Oh dang this resonates with me ....thanks I need to work on myself now
Dope video man, hella appreciate this.
Great message. I needed to hear this
Great vid
man.... I needed this
Ridiculously good brother