Things You NEED To Hear ("Tough Love") About ROCD/Anxiety
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ต.ค. 2021
- In this video, I talk about 8 things you need to hear but feel resistant to hearing about Relationship OCD/Anxiety.
Think of this video like the "tough love" you need to hear for you to truly find freedom from ROCD and anxiety. It's a video you didn't realize you needed!
Let me know in the comments by typing "tough love" if you like these type of videos and want more "tough love" content to help you.
5:28 - "You can't get better without putting in the work"
9:33 - "You need to lean into discomfort to change"
14:24 - "Let go of having 100% certainty"
16:56 - "No matter where you go, there you are"
18:36 - "You can't educate yourself out"
19:28 -"Take self-responsibility and ownership"
24:40 - "Sometimes we need help and support"
26:30 - "You won't go back to where you were"
#herestobeinghuman, #yana
» ROCD 2.0 COURSE & COMMUNITY: rocdcourse.com/
» ITUNES PODCAST: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
» SPOTIFY PODCAST: open.spotify.com/show/6BrSot3...
» WEBSITE: AWAKENINTOLOVE.COM
» INSTAGRAM: / withawakenintolove
» ROCD FREE CHECKLIST: rocdcourse.com/the-checklist
Disclaimer: All of the information listed in this channel is for informative, motivational, educational purposes only. If you are specifically looking for a licensed and professional therapist then you are welcome to work with our therapist, if not, we will refer you to someone else. Please note that this channel is not meant to diagnose you or treat a mental health disorder but serves only as education and motivation.
#ROCD, #Relationshipocd, #Relationshipanxiety, #OCD
My ROCD has almost fully healed because of you, and exposure therapy. I am so happy and grateful for you and your channel. God bless you K❤️🥺
Hello. May I ask how did you start your exposure therapy? So happy to hear that you are recovering well!!
@@keretaman hiya, thank you so much. I started when I had the thoughts but was by myself and basically forced myself to sit there and hear them, then I started to say out loud oh you're right ocd. Yeah he's not for me etc. And this basically stops all the panic because you agree with it. Then I had the thoughts while being with my bf so I forced myself to sit next to him and get even closer to him by kissing or cuddling and just letting myself think them, 20 mins later they went and I felt love again. Since then I've bad days of thoughts but it doesn't cause a panic anymore and I just laugh them off and then I go back to normal and loving my bf. They have hardly any power over me now. Good luck
@@melissarose2311 Heya. Thank you so much. I will work on this. It makes sense, and I've heard about this before. I'm trying out different methods of reacting to the intrusive thoughts and feelings. Gosh your progress sounds so good and gives me hope. Keep it up! Wishing you all the best :))) Thank youuu
@@keretaman good luck wishing you all the best it's a horrible thing to deal with❤️
Happy to see this for you! I know it’s so so hard it just recently hit me very very bad and man it sucks!
It’s amazing how the puzzle pieces fit together. I’ve always had signs of OCD in my life and after some deeply stressful times, it came at its worst in an incredibly healthy and healing 3 year relationship. Now through trauma therapy, other resources, and your videos: I’ve learned that all my pieces fit together. My OCD is a result of my trauma but my trauma and OCD do not define me nor what I wish in life. I am on the path to obtain what I want and no matter what I will be ok. Your videos are providing me a lot of clarity and motivation to keep working through the ROCD and continue in finding inner peace within my amazing relationship. This is the year of healing for me! I can grow and allow myself to heal in the safety of my relationship. Thank you for these videos. They are assisting me immensely in my journey. :)
Thank you so so much. I almost left my partner before I found you. I was running from discomfort so much to the point that I bought a plane ticket to move to A WHOLE OTHER COUNTRY. Finally leaned into my discomfort thanks to you. Couldn't be more grateful! 🙏
More of this please, also as a partner of someone with rocd it would be great to get more support and help for partners of someone with rocd ♡
Damn, I needed to hear this.
It's really hard for me to living in the gray and also take responsability. Past me would end up this video, talk about it with my partner and feel better for a while, now I choose to just ask for a hug and try to move along healing myself
Thanks a lot Kiyomi
Oh! I just spoke to my partner about my ROCD symptoms today and was afraid I might rely on her for reassurances but reading your comment, OK yes that sounds good. Ask for a hug and move along! Wishing you all the best, thank you!
Thank you very much for this! and everything you do
Thank you Kiyomi! Loved the last part too about we were meant to evolve!
You've helped so much throughout this year and still continue to do so, thank you so much!
I've been stuck for a long time I really need you to hear this video thank you so much
Amazing video that will literally change lives!!! God bless you!
Well
I needed to hear that
Thank you for everything you post here on TH-cam. It has been helping me so much on awareness and taking the opportunity to awaken into love with my partner. I'll do this for myself. And I'm glad I have him by my side. Thank you so much.
,, thank you I really need you to hear this to remind me I will have to watch this again over and over again I have been stuck for a long time and this is going to help me move forward thank you so much🙏
Thank you Kiyomi for the information. it's "bitter trurh"! wish u make another video and tell us more about the actions we could take in order to get better. Such as "facing our discomfort".
Totally the "work" we should put into it. Thank you love.
U feel like my friend who can comfort me when I am in my hardest times. ❤
All so true. I used to be so anxious but now that I’m further along my in my healing things have gotten so much better. It’s still work and I still have my anxious days, and that’s probably never going to change, but I feel so grateful for my relationship now ❤️
Great information, and so true. Our minds are malleable. They respond best to love, and also to truth! If anyone is wondering, the course is amazing and worth every penny. It's actually really inexpensive for what you're getting, IMO.
Thanks for helping.
Thanks for subtitules! ❤️ I'm not a native English-speaker and I really need to overcome my ROCD and there aren't good contents in mi native language!
I think I needed this quite a bit, not only with my thoughts with rocd but also in life.
I got accepted into a college that required a 1 hour or more commute and I've yet to accept it. I'm not sure whether to take it still but I get nervous when I think about the commute because travelling sounds boring and tiring but it makes me worry about my relationship too. I get worried all the time in case it fails and now whenever I don't get butterflies and smile immediately I get worried and panicked, and its affecting how I function in dates. I just want to put in the work and know that it will be hard but after a couple days of thinking to my brain "yeah okay OCD you're right" I still get nervous but I know it requires that to change. I just need to know if it will be over and I can be with her without obsessing. If they thoughts just go away I'll be fine :)
I needed this ❤
Good day! You may ask, most likely I had Relationship OCD, but I constantly doubt it. But now my thoughts have practically disappeared and my anxiety has subsided, but doubts and feelings that I have stopped loving, that I have cooled down to the girl and that feelings have not gone away. Is this normal with relationship OCD? I'm thinking it over, trying to prove that there are feelings, but it's like I'm lying. I'm trying to find info
@@kriakbro5758 yes! That's very normal with Rocd!
Its a sneaky one, ROCD tries to convince you that these thoughts, doubts, feelings are 'real', so real that they pose danger to your brain and body! So we are stuck in a cycle of knowing its ocd, doubting that it's ocd, then spiralling again out of fear! What you're experiencing is totally normal, and if anything, it just proves that you do have ocd, because that is a common and classic experience ❤
Try gentle ERP, im doing it at the moment and it is really tough but it works! 💪
hi i love your videos so much, you seriously are such a gem!!
can you or anyone answer me why a reoccurring thought i have is always “im better when i’m alone(single)” like i feel like i accomplish more and just kinda better overall?
Hello, I have been watching your channel for a while now and I have not been diagnosed with ROCD officially but a lot of the obsessions and intrusive thoughts and sometimes compulsions show up. The check lists i’ve seen online all check out. My current therapist is unaware of ROCD. I was really motivated on a diagnosed until I got on a new medicine, which treats OCD. I have gotten better but I sometimes get anxious. Since educating my self of ROCD it’s easier to stop compulsions, which I actually found almost invalidating bc I was mainly having intrusive thoughts and thought perhaps I didn’t have ROCD. I’m getting better and i’m quite young and in a stressful money situation now. Any advise on spiritual work and continued ROCD work if you’re not sure where to start, and not sure on where to get actual help on this subject. If there isn’t already a video on exposure work with out therapy I feel like that would be helpful.
I have a therapist, but idk if she even knows about rocd. I talked to her about my anxiety and intrusive thoughts before I learned about rocd, and she thinks it's all just because of the pandemic and isolation I've been experiencing. The pandemic definitely made it a lot worse, but I know that the thoughts and worries were already there long ago. Exercising and keeping myself busy, as she told me to do, helps to a degree, but it feels like a sort of anesthesia. I want to keep doing what she instructed me to, but I also want to tackle the root problem. I know that I have to put in a lot of work, and I want her to guide me in that journey, but I'm scared that she won't take me seriously. Idk if she even knows about rocd, and I don't want her to think I'm trying to self-diagnose as a way to ditch her advice. I just want her to understand me. Learning about rocd made me feel understood like never before. Knowing that there are people out there with the same thoughts and worries, knowing that there's a way out, was such a relief. I want my therapist to understand me, too...but I don't know how.
Tl, dr: how do I tell my therapist I think I might have rocd and ask her to guide me in the healing journey, without her judging me or thinking I'm attention-seeking or smth?
A mi igual, me pasa exactamente lo mismo. Acabo de empezar con una terapeuta cognitiva y me dice lo de hacer ejercicio y meditar, organizarme, y siento que me ayuda por un rato, pero no es una solución permanente en absoluto. Es como congelar la superficie de un lago y patinar ahí sabiendo que en cualquier parte podría colapsar (analogía medio extraña ya se jajaj). Pero te entiendo totalmente. Kiyomi habla de hacer el trabajo independientemente si no podés pagar el curso pero a mi se me hace muy dificil saber por donde empezar si no tengo un guía concreto (sea una persona o un curso).
El tocr es un subtipo del toc, y quizá no conozca el subtipo pero sí claramente al toc. Es importante que te sinceres con tu terapeuta porque su trabajo es ayudarte lo mejor posible a vos, no tenés que sentir responsabilidad por "herir sus sentimientos" (ya se que no expresaste eso particularmente) porque no estás siendo descortés al decirle que cierta ayuda no te sirve al 100%, sino que incluso ayudas a que ella quizá te diga que no te puede ayudar con eso y quizá te toque ir a otro terapeuta (lo cual es totalmente normal).
Estás haciendo psicoanálisis o cbt?
Wrong: you don't have the ability to heal, you only have the ability (sometimes) to improve a bit. The intensity of the (biologic) OCD is who decides how well or bad you're going to be, in much the same way you can't change many things about a cancer. Of course you can do things, but the OCD is always on command (if not properly treated, of course).
Kiyomi Im really new to your course and I'm confused. Lately when obsessing instead of like googling and continuing to focus on what I'm obsessing over, Ive been watching a comfort show to get my mind off of it, and eventually it does and I feel better. Is that not good? Because Im working towards doing something creative instead of Netflix, but is it bad to watch a show? You mentioned sitting on the couch and stuff and I was like oh shit hahaha
Hello! I have an question about ROCD. I`ve been suffering rocd thoughts for 6 months now, and thank god what a relief it was when I found out I'm not alone and I'm not crazy and I really don't want to break up with my partner. I'm sure I've had every single ROCD thought that you could have and it has really controlled my life and I've been so anxious. Your videos mean so much to me. I was just wondering, I've never had an OCD diagnosis, but I'm like 150% sure I have ROCD, and in the past I was struggling with the fear of diseases which I have also read about that it could be one of those OCD types. Anyway the question was: Can I say I have ROCD if I've had experienced every single thing that it includes even though I don't have a diagnosis of OCD?
@classical chameleon Guys, tell me, my girlfriend and I are now at a distance. And it happens when the girl is not there, I start to worry, what if the feelings disappear and I cool down to her because we do not communicate? Or there is a thought that all this is tired, she is tired and it scares. Is this common in relationship OCD?And also what kind of nervousness, discomfort and irritation everything connected with her. As if she pisses me off. Is this normal with ROCD? as if I do not want to communicate with her and it is imposing and it bothers me.
@classical chameleon And what scares me now is that I sabotage the relationship. When she leaves to read, etc. I stupidly wait for her without doing anything and constantly worry when she is not there, I endlessly want to communicate. And I already have thoughts that I'm just in a dependent relationship. When there is a quarrel, I am afraid to speak out so as not to offend her. But sometimes I say that something infuriates me and she takes offense. Because of this, the thought that we have not a healthy relationship. I'm afraid of losing her. but because they told me that this is an addictive relationship and not love, I am desperate
@classical chameleon sorry for my english i am from Ukraine
@classical chameleon November 28 will be 4 months..
@classical chameleon tell me, maybe I just need to return to sports, take care of myself again? but do not forget about the girl?
🥰
can rocd appear because we care about someone very much, we love someone very much and we do not want to lose them?
How old do you have to be to join the course?!
Mettete i sottotitoli in ITALIANO, vi prego!! 🙏🙏🙏
Ladies please help...I am 21 yrs old suffering from rocd.Is it common that at times you feel that now your compulsions are not caused by rocd anymore but just beacause of you,thats how you feel.
Or do you feel annoyed at your boyfriend,I do.
Sometimes when he posts I think to my self he is stupid or crazy.
Good day! You may ask, most likely I had Relationship OCD, but I constantly doubt it. But now my thoughts have practically disappeared and my anxiety has subsided, but doubts and feelings that I have stopped loving, that I have cooled down to the girl and that feelings have not gone away. Is this normal with relationship OCD? I'm thinking it over, trying to prove that there are feelings, but it's like I'm lying. I'm trying to find info
please tell me how to handle this situation... before I even have a thought/feeling/sensation/urge I start to fear the situation which I know may trigger my ocd. And surely then I have the thoughts coz i was already contemplating it. How should I stop fearing the triggers? Whenever am not fearing or preoccupied I find that the same situation doesn't cause any reaction in me. Please help!! My wedding is in a month and i know it's a hugr trigger for me. I don't wanna lose that day to my ocd.
@classical chameleon thank you so much. I need all the love n prayers I can get. I have been able to get a bit better... still a long way to go.
Guys, tell me, my girlfriend and I are now at a distance. And it happens when the girl is not there, I start to worry, what if the feelings disappear and I cool down to her because we do not communicate? Or there is a thought that all this is tired, she is tired and it scares. Is this common in relationship OCD?And also what kind of nervousness, discomfort and irritation everything connected with her. As if she pisses me off. Is this normal with ROCD? as if I do not want to communicate with her and it is imposing and it bothers me.
Help, if I can’t afford a therapist or the course can someone please suggest other options? I would really need to follow a course and I don’t know what to do
I got a book for 3.99 it’s been really helpful If ur interested
same here, is online therapy okay? I think it can be helpful but understand if it can be expensive
Keep watching the vdos here on TH-cam. There are many other channels as well. Take help from all of them. Collect knowledge and do ERP on your own. Just follow 1 line "come what may (thoughts/feelings/emotions/sexual response), if it doesn't relate with your morals and your core beliefs, then it's all OCD and needs to be disregarded". Your brain is NOT you coz it'll send you thoughts and make physical responses that you won't like. YOU are YOUR MORALS and YOUR WISDOM. There are lot of videos that go into the scientific details of ocd and all the things that come with it. If you want go check them out n you'll know better and it'll help you heal. Just don't take them as reassurance. Take it as knowing something new.
@@anweshabardhan1579 Do you have any other channels in particular you watch?
@@enyagodridge1891 Can you tell me the name please?
The last one is so so confusing. Infatuation won’t exist anymore? Anxiety will always be there even after we “heal?” How is the new way better??
The new way probably means you’ve healed yourself to a point where you can rely on yourself and know what is going on inside your brain and you found a way to be okay with bad feelings situations etc. because it’s normal it’s a part of human being to have those days ❤️and you probably won’t get back into those extremes because you’ve learned so much and know how to handle those thoughts and feelings.
I'm going through ROCD right now, and my doctor has given me anti depressant, is that not god? Or can it make it worse?, how do i handle this?, thanks for doing videos like this, I am gonna start watching all your videos so maybe I can heal,, and I am happy for you that you are doing well, hope I can become well son to💜🙏