I have had plenty of anger under my hood ever since I realized I used to be too nice and anybody could walk all over me. I am no longer nice. I push back and I feel good about it no matter I win or lose. I no longer feel embarrassed by not being 'nice' to people. The memories of all these countless moments in my life when I was taken advantage of because I was 'nice' simply make my blood boil with rage over my past clueless naivety.
I don't believe being nice is helpful. Nice people don't say what they are really feeling, they pretend things are OK when they are not. But being angry is not the only alternative. Boiling with rage hurts you as much as others. You can be honest, assertive and even kind while keeping good boundaries to keep from being abused. But I wouldn't advise being nice. It's dishonest.
I just realized that the moments in my life that I felt the most angry, for the longest, were also the moments I was made to feel ashamed of how I felt and wanted for myself.
As usual, excellent; helpful and wise. Unfortunately, if you were brought up by ill-tempered parents, there is a good chance you will become ill-tempered too, having been exposed to this behavior. On the other hand, there is no reason to be resigned to this: cycles can be broken.
This is a good insight. Yes, we are conditioned to by our parents, especially in the area of anger. It takes humility and hard work that we can become more self-aware and work at getting to the roots of our anger. It is possible to change.
To be concise while maintaining weight and gravity commensurate with complicated subject matter is really something. You really gave me a lot to work with in just over 2 minutes. Thank you sir
I recommend ‘The Surprising Purpose of Anger’ by Marshall B. Rosenberg. It goes into more depth about the way you are talking about anger. It’s an easy read but amazing and mind blowing
Sage advice. Very informative, in a succinct way that many channels and experts don’t seem to be. It’s fascinating hearing the mechanics of how specific aspects of psychology work.
I suspect I do have a reservoir. I studied martial arts for many years and learned to hone my aggression, so that it would not need to be expressed wildly. But then, I went through horrible emotional turmoil, and frustration at the fact that I had the power to control my situation through force, but knowing I shouldn't use it. My life was full of pain and sorrow. These days I'm doing much better. I'm never angry, even when stressed. But I know the fury is still in there, deep under the surface, waiting for the opportunity to be expressed.
I have had plenty of anger under my hood ever since I realized I used to be too nice and anybody could walk all over me. I am no longer nice. I push back and I feel good about it no matter I win or lose. I no longer feel embarrassed by not being 'nice' to people. The memories of all these countless moments in my life when I was taken advantage of because I was 'nice' simply make my blood boil with rage over my past clueless naivety.
I don't believe being nice is helpful. Nice people don't say what they are really feeling, they pretend things are OK when they are not. But being angry is not the only alternative. Boiling with rage hurts you as much as others. You can be honest, assertive and even kind while keeping good boundaries to keep from being abused. But I wouldn't advise being nice. It's dishonest.
I love this guy
He has incredibly good advice and he sounds more like George Carlin than any person I’ve ever heard short of the man himself
Thanks. Old white guys all sound alike.
this is my first video here and it's so enlightening to know that constant rage comes from shame. that really explains a lot
I just realized that the moments in my life that I felt the most angry, for the longest, were also the moments I was made to feel ashamed of how I felt and wanted for myself.
As usual, excellent; helpful and wise. Unfortunately, if you were brought up by ill-tempered parents, there is a good chance you will become ill-tempered too, having been exposed to this behavior. On the other hand, there is no reason to be resigned to this: cycles can be broken.
This is a good insight. Yes, we are conditioned to by our parents, especially in the area of anger. It takes humility and hard work that we can become more self-aware and work at getting to the roots of our anger. It is possible to change.
To be concise while maintaining weight and gravity commensurate with complicated subject matter is really something. You really gave me a lot to work with in just over 2 minutes.
Thank you sir
Thank you.
I've been able to do this for years, mostly frustration and injustice. I carry a righteous anger and a sword in my belly.....
I recommend ‘The Surprising Purpose of Anger’ by Marshall B. Rosenberg. It goes into more depth about the way you are talking about anger. It’s an easy read but amazing and mind blowing
Thank you 🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁🎄🎁
Thank you too
This was my first time watching one of your videos...Thank you for sharing your wisdom
The world needs to hear more of your messages
Thank you.
I will always choose anger. Especially after the past four years. Humanity proved it wasn't worth trusting. So all bets are off.
Sage advice. Very informative, in a succinct way that many channels and experts don’t seem to be. It’s fascinating hearing the mechanics of how specific aspects of psychology work.
I appreciate that!
Good advice Doctor, thankyou!
Thank you.
Dr! World is in fire, all people are sick and stressed and you omg! You discover the light!
Thank you. We all need some light in our lives.
I know for sure i do
I suspect I do have a reservoir. I studied martial arts for many years and learned to hone my aggression, so that it would not need to be expressed wildly. But then, I went through horrible emotional turmoil, and frustration at the fact that I had the power to control my situation through force, but knowing I shouldn't use it. My life was full of pain and sorrow.
These days I'm doing much better. I'm never angry, even when stressed. But I know the fury is still in there, deep under the surface, waiting for the opportunity to be expressed.
There is always another emotion under fury. It’s there waiting to be discovered.
@@DrMarkBaker True. I suspect there's a great font of love underneath. I may need some kind of outlet to physically release this tension.
Amazing insights. Listening from India 🇮🇳 ♥️
Thank you for listening all the way from India.
Im a reservoir of shame and therefore resentment. Thank you, humanity, for how you've treated me.
Rage tied to shame
Thank you!!!!
Shame
.... Oh that's a big one... Like a dinasaw
Anger is tethered to the hell realms.
I certainly do.
How do you address the shame? How do you get rid of the shame so you’re not a ticking time bomb???
Watch my videos on overcoming shame or get my book titled “overcoming shame“
Yep. Shame. Can be grounds for self destruction. I notice you recommend the shame video
@DrMarkBaker Is righteous anger a problem?
Good job, good advice.
Glad it was helpful!
Wow...
Excellent
Thanks
The problem is life and people.
Interesting