Donald Jr.'s Testimony Summarized: 'I Do Not Recall'

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ก.ย. 2024
  • Anything Jeff Sessions cannot recall, Donald Trump Jr. cannot remember better!
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  • @shadowhegog9798
    @shadowhegog9798 6 ปีที่แล้ว +474

    At least we have reached the point that when I tell my baby brother he is acting like Trump, he immediately bursts into tears.

    • @MsPrincesspaulina
      @MsPrincesspaulina 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Now that's FUNNY!!

    • @stargateorion1912
      @stargateorion1912 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Guy Digging that is so wrong

    • @benojukwu9103
      @benojukwu9103 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Guy Digging
      😁😁😁

    • @lesleyleith4440
      @lesleyleith4440 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      An excellent analogy, Donny Dirtbag is a pouty, baggy assed three year old.

    • @rogerstarkey5390
      @rogerstarkey5390 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      thibaut barguil
      It's taken that long??

  • @rgwak
    @rgwak 6 ปีที่แล้ว +454

    Colbert's "douchebag" voice for Jr is spot on!

    • @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748
      @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He’s sounds like my cousins’ step dad 😂😂

    • @110100111000
      @110100111000 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No that's more of a jock voice.

    • @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748
      @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      11O1OO111OOO nah it’s a douche voice it’s just many many jocks are also douches

    • @scottmckenzie5476
      @scottmckenzie5476 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ro G
      American Psycho.

    • @mavendeo
      @mavendeo 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ro G
      Really? I was thinking he wasn't adding enough douche to it to be believable.

  • @minuusha
    @minuusha 6 ปีที่แล้ว +108

    Holy crap. Stephen nailed the impressions of those three presidents.

  • @dicedavis84
    @dicedavis84 6 ปีที่แล้ว +93

    Colbert = living legend

    • @skippingrhyme4386
      @skippingrhyme4386 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Bro he Killed it lmao, That "Worst Case Scenario Simon Cowell" Lol

  • @ke7892
    @ke7892 6 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    Colbert's presidential impersonations are absolute gold!

    • @js-ty9dk
      @js-ty9dk 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true

    • @11bkev
      @11bkev 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      They are pathetic and unfunny because he clearly has a biased point of view.

    • @sillygoose635
      @sillygoose635 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@11bkev no they aren't, and you only think otherwise because you have a biased point of view

  • @acciousername6776
    @acciousername6776 6 ปีที่แล้ว +426

    "I do not recall..."
    Who does he think he is, Jeff Sessions?!

    • @Miss1Ginger
      @Miss1Ginger 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Accio Username lmao

    • @TimeandMonotony
      @TimeandMonotony 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Exactly what I was thinking!

    • @Nilas55
      @Nilas55 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Judge: What's your name:
      Jeff Sessions: I don't recall!

    • @age-ben4910
      @age-ben4910 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      +Accio Username What did you have for breakfast a few hours ago..."I Do Not Recall"

    • @willtheangrydudeist9120
      @willtheangrydudeist9120 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Or Alberto Gonzales, Tom Delay, Karl Rove, Donald Rumsfeld, Oliver North, Edwin Meese... etc. Lol

  • @arturovaldemar
    @arturovaldemar 6 ปีที่แล้ว +499

    Sometimes I think Giuliani is secretly against Trump.

    • @mathewpoole3589
      @mathewpoole3589 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Arturo Valdemar
      Nah he's just trying to seed the plausibility of preexisting behavior.
      Its better to portray Trump as a possible sleaze bag then have there be no doubt that his actions were politically driven.

    • @dugduggart5915
      @dugduggart5915 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Arturo Valdemar he’s a mole

    • @larryjohnny
      @larryjohnny 6 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      If that's the case then Giuliani is a master of revenge!

    • @grete46
      @grete46 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Yes, I have had the same thoughts now and then. Could be, but that is difficult to know.

    • @stargateorion1912
      @stargateorion1912 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Arturo Valdemar i think so too

  • @qasimahmad8165
    @qasimahmad8165 6 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    Interviewer: “so is Mr Trump innocent?”Giuliani: “Well legally you can’t indict a sitting president.”
    Nuff Said

    • @raptorblader
      @raptorblader 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Only for certain crimes, think of it as Diplomatic immunity.

    • @PaulZink
      @PaulZink 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      But after he's no longer in office… Wham, Bam, thank you Ma'am!

    • @oltedders
      @oltedders 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      raptorblader
      Like...crimes.

    • @oltedders
      @oltedders 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      James Schrader
      No, there's not a long list. Bush's Patriot Act is the most egregious set of violations of civil rights to date that gave rise to what continued in the Obama administration.
      BTW, no one "infiltrated" Trump's campaign. A single informant was in contact with George Papadopoulos who had already raised a red flag when he told the Australian ambassador that he was in contact with elements within the Russian government. The FBI had no involvement in the campaign itself. There were no spies involved.

    • @PaulZink
      @PaulZink 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      And don't forget Warren G. Harding.

  • @reaganlear6548
    @reaganlear6548 6 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    "Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason".
    *Mark Twain*

  • @misterb3577
    @misterb3577 6 ปีที่แล้ว +187

    Trump Jr.'s least favorite movie: *Total Recall*

  • @saitamatrash2527
    @saitamatrash2527 6 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    When the monologue is one peace, oh the gods have bestowed us with a gift on this fine Friday!

  • @ariloveshouse
    @ariloveshouse 6 ปีที่แล้ว +637

    "I Do Not Recall" should be the slogan for Trump 2020.

    • @lionsofwar9847
      @lionsofwar9847 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      moonwalkingthroughlife haaaah! haaaah!

    • @scottmckenzie5476
      @scottmckenzie5476 6 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      moonwalkingthroughlife
      Or Trump for prison 2020. Now that would truly make America great again.

    • @tammytruthout8465
      @tammytruthout8465 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Worked for Sessions.

    • @jeremeerxleben6671
      @jeremeerxleben6671 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      moonwalkingthroughlife Trump 2020, MAGA! ☆ ★ ☆ ★ Fk the snowflake libtards

    • @strangewayfaringstranger
      @strangewayfaringstranger 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      "Remember when Trump was president?"
      "I do not recall."
      Or an idea for a new movie. "Total Do Not Recall"

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1328

    I have a 7 year old who's figured out that lying doesn't work if you just keep changing your story until something 'sticks'. Wonder when Donny Jr. will hit that developmental milestone.

    • @jdnelson121
      @jdnelson121 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It's like he's using Hillary's playbook huh?

    • @TheGozz13
      @TheGozz13 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Not in this lifetime..!!! LOL

    • @pansepot1490
      @pansepot1490 6 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      New Message, telling a few lies doesn't work but lying no stop is very effective. According to polls, the large majority of Republicans believe Trump is innocent and the witch hunt is real.

    • @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748
      @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Joshua Nelson watch out she’s behind you!!

    • @MusicByJC
      @MusicByJC 6 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Actually no. Hillary was investigated and didn't cry about it ever second and of course they came up empty handed. In Trumps case, new evidence of the corruption, fraud and pay to play schemes come out ever day. A number of people indited. 6 people now have plead guilty, the newest being Manfort's son-in-law and he is not working with Mueller.
      Maybe they are using the same playbook and the difference is due to Hillary being innocent and Trump being guilty of too many crimes to count.

  • @donstoddard8458
    @donstoddard8458 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Once again hitting the nail on the head. Thank you Stephen

  • @nzfisherclan
    @nzfisherclan 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    On fire Mr Colbert, truly on fire ....love your work.

  • @19thHour
    @19thHour 6 ปีที่แล้ว +622

    "I never taught you to lie. That's why you're so *BAD* at it." - Thanos to Gamora, 2018 (Alternatively: Donald to Donjr, 2018)

    • @alanarunmavath6005
      @alanarunmavath6005 6 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      19thHour plz push jr of a cliff for the no jail stone

    • @ԷմմանուելԷզենվանՄեղր
      @ԷմմանուելԷզենվանՄեղր 6 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Except that the trump's are really awful at it. Both of them can't tell a sensible lie.

    • @biocapsule7311
      @biocapsule7311 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Correction... Donald likely did taught jr to lied, that's why it's so bad...

    • @shaymyers829
      @shaymyers829 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      19thHour Best comment 🏆😂

    • @mavendeo
      @mavendeo 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      19thHour
      *Hey! Spoiler warning?*
      Damn, man... It's bad enough I already figured out if anyone died, who they were, and _how_ they died thanks to random internet spoilers.

  • @ark4269
    @ark4269 6 ปีที่แล้ว +236

    Happy Muellerversary!

    • @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748
      @depressedgaysassyitalianre5748 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ark 42 okay now he can GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!!!

    • @jeremeerxleben6671
      @jeremeerxleben6671 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ark 42 Mueller and deepstate puppets going down

    • @smurfette1509
      @smurfette1509 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      jereme Erxleben As long as President Clown and his goons go down with 'em. Here's something you'd like: Go stick Hannity up your ass, idiot.

    • @jeremeerxleben6671
      @jeremeerxleben6671 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Morgan Field go ahead support deepstate Mueller and his lies keep eating the shit they feed you Trump 2020 MAGA! ☆ ★ ☆ ★ Trump and his goons are here to stay.

    • @Murmurrr
      @Murmurrr 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      jereme Erxleben lmao alright kid, nice stars

  • @samuelvimes5770
    @samuelvimes5770 6 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    1. There was no meeting
    2. The meeting wasn´t at Trump tower
    3. There weren´t any russians
    4. None of us met with any russians
    5. None of us met with any russians connected to the russian government
    6. Didn´t know what the meeting was about
    7. Meeting joined by Jared, Don jr and Manafort wasn´t important
    8. The meeting with russians connected to the russian government wasn´t about collusion
    9. The meeting with russians connected to the russian government was only about sanctions
    10. Meeting with russians was nothing because they had no dirt on Hillary
    11. Trump never knew about Don jr, Jared & Manfort meeting russians in Trump Tower
    ...

    • @114418514
      @114418514 6 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Notice how that mirrors their Climate Change stance as well, from
      "Climate Change isn't happening" back then
      to
      "Our actions aren't the biggest contributor to greenhouse gasses" today

    • @c.l.freeman7654
      @c.l.freeman7654 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      You forgot the whole adoption thing

    • @mimimarcus
      @mimimarcus 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      That's a damn good list of the many versions of one lie that the Trump family has admitted, each version inching closer to the truth. Somebody out there has got to have evidence of Don Jr calling Don Sr during that meeting. Please leak the evidence, so we all can have a national holiday!!!

    • @trysometruth
      @trysometruth 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +Comrade Trump The _Adoption Thing_ is the _Sanctions Thing._ Putin's angry response to the Magnitsky Act's passage (sanctions against Putin-connected oligarchs) was to ban Americans from adopting Russian babies. When they say "we were talking about adoptions" it means "we were talking about how we were promising to eliminate sanctions".

    • @otis747baff
      @otis747baff 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hahahaha! None of the above.

  • @theinterfaithshepherd9075
    @theinterfaithshepherd9075 6 ปีที่แล้ว +142

    I very much look forward to Trump's eviction from office. If he committed a crime, he must be put in jail like every other criminal. People are sitting in jail for 25yrs for selling pot. What should he get for selling our country as a traitor?

    • @reubenbell1980
      @reubenbell1980 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Shocky Shocky

    • @izzad777
      @izzad777 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      you guys Americans had serious white collar crime problems since 9/11. FBI used to take white collar crimes a lot more serious before 9/11, now its all terrorism while cripplingly damaging corruptions are pretty much left unchecked and unpunished. Americans need to get this back into the spotlight, only then your country can be sane again. terrorism in another continent will not kill you. these misuse of power in large scale will.

    • @plumbloko688
      @plumbloko688 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Plum loko

    • @Chief2Moon
      @Chief2Moon 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Again I ask...could we tar&feather him now while we're waiting for him to get out of office & be tried & sentenced? He'll have things tied up in courts the next 10-15yrs before an actual trial begins. Haha...sad but true

    • @bettiegoober7853
      @bettiegoober7853 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      He should get life in solitary confinement.

  • @buffboy1954
    @buffboy1954 6 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Colbert's impressions of Nixon and Clinton were absolutely brilliant, although, as a Scotsman, I may not be the best judge! Thank God for Colbert - he sees right through Trump's avalanche of lies.

    • @trnharris
      @trnharris 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Bruce Maher The *majority* of people with eyes do;-)

    • @reubenbell1980
      @reubenbell1980 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      So much winning folks

    • @albertelnen4995
      @albertelnen4995 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Trump is his best impression.

  • @zygmuntthecacaokakistocrat6589
    @zygmuntthecacaokakistocrat6589 6 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    "Dad gets angry when you interrupt his toilet burger" is modern poetry. Shakespeare, almost. If he werent dead.

  • @breadyegg
    @breadyegg 6 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    "...worse case scenario Simon Cowell" LOLd

  • @kennedybaz7254
    @kennedybaz7254 6 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    My 6 year old son lied to me about eating his vegetables, when I find out that he lied I got angry and I asked why did you lie to me? where do you think lying will get you in life? he simply answered me to the White House.

    • @tammytruthout8465
      @tammytruthout8465 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Kennedy Baz out of the mouths of babes... Sadly true.

    • @mmhoss
      @mmhoss 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      And then everybody clapped

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Kennedy Baz which is why America MUST see this through. Our children deserve a better example.

    • @judeconnor-macintyre9874
      @judeconnor-macintyre9874 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@mmhoss that happned

  • @uainediabhal9689
    @uainediabhal9689 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    "His toilet burger"! Thank the Gods that we have laughter to get us through this; We love you Stephen

  • @milacridlig8401
    @milacridlig8401 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    This show is pure genius!!!

  • @wairimumukuria959
    @wairimumukuria959 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Comedy gold. Warmest greetings with a dash of sunshine from Nairobi, Kenya.

    • @amnonmeyers6946
      @amnonmeyers6946 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Trump's birthplace! Why won't he show his birth certificate?

  • @TheTwick
    @TheTwick 6 ปีที่แล้ว +126

    One year anniversary gift is paper - as in subpoenas.

  • @frantura7482
    @frantura7482 6 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    I for one do not recall writing this comment,,

    • @richarddarlington1139
      @richarddarlington1139 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Fran Tura
      What comment?
      I do not recall reading your comment saying you don't recall writing that comment.

    • @reaganlear6548
      @reaganlear6548 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Fran Tura What comment?

    • @shaymyers829
      @shaymyers829 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fran Tura 😂

    • @Lowkeylie
      @Lowkeylie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@richarddarlington1139 That’s ridiculous. There never was any comment, and even if there was, since when are comments something you read?

    • @richarddarlington1139
      @richarddarlington1139 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Lowkeylie
      This was two years ago.
      I don't recall making that comment.

  • @mlghelp2day
    @mlghelp2day 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    ...."IS HE GONE??!" The face that Stephen made. Lol😅

  • @vitorjanela2782
    @vitorjanela2782 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Colbert's monologues are the best in late night tv. There ive said it!

  • @EvelineUK
    @EvelineUK 6 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    I guess he is not blessed with his dad's amazing memory. Poor sod.

    • @MrBlockice22
      @MrBlockice22 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      EvelineUK sod, good one. A son of a dummy LOL

  • @samuelclemens1691
    @samuelclemens1691 6 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Politicians are very much like diapers they should be changed as often as possible, and for the same reason. Mark Twain.

  • @HunterTracks
    @HunterTracks 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1603

    The whole Trump team is currently beating whatever the world record for "Most collective amnesia" is. Apparently, stupidity isn't the only trait that spreads.

    • @shantoreywilkins651
      @shantoreywilkins651 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Unknown Error 🎩
      😁
      👕👍Great!
      👖

    • @YouTuneIt
      @YouTuneIt 6 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      Im not sure about the about how official the role of the senior advisor to the president is, does he receive money, is he empowered to act or can it just a honorary role privately given (which I doubt) but any government employee or official who when under investigation or called on as a witness can not give more satisfying answers than "I do not recall" should at least immediately be let go as unfit for office. Either they are liars or they are mentally incompetent for holding that position. (eying over to Jeff Sessions). For gods sake elementary school kids are held to a higher standard.
      And I am by no means meaning this hasn't been an issue before Trump, but under his Regime it has become the norm to shamelessly lie and dodge any responsibility. The damage this is doing to public discourse and the office is worse than most legislation he could try to pass.

    • @soyborne.bornmadeandundone1342
      @soyborne.bornmadeandundone1342 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Well shit lol... Not being able to remember stuff is pretty much what stupidity is.

    • @elliotboertje5079
      @elliotboertje5079 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Why argue against hillary or trump being derided? Its clear that both were abysmal candidates that made a mockery of the intricate inner workings of the constitution, lets not choose the lesser of two evils, lets reject them both please.

    • @colinsmith6448
      @colinsmith6448 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      You sure you aren't referring to Hilary Clinton?

  • @iLOVEpalestineNlebanonFOREVER
    @iLOVEpalestineNlebanonFOREVER 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You know what, I prefer his at home shows. The genuine laughter from his family made it so much better.

    • @BlunderDownUnder
      @BlunderDownUnder 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Agreed and I hope his wife laughing just off camera stays forever!

  • @uainediabhal9689
    @uainediabhal9689 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    "Toilet burger"! HILARIOUS! Thank you Stephen, for helping us to laugh at anything we can, as much as we can, whenever we can; it makes life livable.

  • @jacksondepiero8116
    @jacksondepiero8116 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Best monologue ever.

  • @dafttool
    @dafttool 6 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    First year anniversaries require paper gifts, like sealed indictments

  • @gloriac4224
    @gloriac4224 6 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    Like father like son liars, liars!

    • @seriesjunkie0074
      @seriesjunkie0074 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Gloria C The shit didn't fall far from the asshole.😁

  • @noorjahankhan1484
    @noorjahankhan1484 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Colbert’s on Fireeeee tonight 🔥🔥🔥😂😂😂

  • @slxcrunr
    @slxcrunr 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Got damn, Colbert in rare form here. One of his best segments in recent memory

  • @brandondavidson4085
    @brandondavidson4085 6 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    1:15, I am now using "twote" as the past tense conjugation for the verb "tweet".

  • @TheBIackSheep
    @TheBIackSheep 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Steven was on fire tonight lol. Great show!

  • @VincentAnzalone
    @VincentAnzalone 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Question: "when's the last time you spoke with your father and he told you that he loved you"
    Don Jr: "I can't remember, but definitely not when I spoke with him right after talking with the Russians"

  • @ratatataraxia
    @ratatataraxia 6 ปีที่แล้ว +122

    It feels weird wishing ill upon our leader. But then I remember who it is and what's he's said and done.

    • @ChronicPainInTheAss
      @ChronicPainInTheAss 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ma Ni
      th-cam.com/video/GkgIgUxSrPU/w-d-xo.html

    • @burntpieceoftoast4148
      @burntpieceoftoast4148 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Mark N.
      Please tell us how the surprise Secret Service visit went! 😂🤣🤣
      Kidding, but still agree with you. He's dangerous and does need to be removed from office.

    • @davidsouza7994
      @davidsouza7994 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sadly, couldn't agree more

    • @Keihryon
      @Keihryon 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      And if the other candidate had won, we'd be in even worse shit...and people like Colbert would be covering it up instead of exposing it. I love the smell of Hypocrisy in the morning.

    • @kabutoyakushi9739
      @kabutoyakushi9739 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Keihryon What exactly makes you think Colbert would be covering it up?
      It's just pretty funny how people like you assume just because others don't like Trump, that all of us blindly follow Hillary

  • @jamesmason7979
    @jamesmason7979 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Lord, have mercy. Stephen went IN on this one!

  • @maxmartin2763
    @maxmartin2763 6 ปีที่แล้ว +202

    DT Jr. First meeting. "I don't recall."
    Second meeting. "I didn't know what is was about and I was SWEATY FROM THE GYM."
    Is that what they call "selective memory loss?"

    • @saluk7419
      @saluk7419 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Seriously. How do you not recall so much anout a meeting you put effort into setting up and attended, but remember the reasons you didn't attend some other meeting.

    • @mlghelp2day
      @mlghelp2day 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Maxmartin selective memory-shitness: Half selective memory and half bullshit🤓😅

    • @thereaction18
      @thereaction18 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      saluk Depends how many meetings you have. I was always a fan of distributing copies of the agenda before the meeting and having a secretary take notes. Same for giving classroom instruction or training.

    • @PaulZink
      @PaulZink 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I assume by "you faggots", you mean the lying Republicans. In which case, you're right: the Russia investigation is going to cripple them in 2018, and sink Trump if he actually decides to run again in 2020 (or is even in a position to run…).

    • @oltedders
      @oltedders 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Rake Steele
      Did you just wake up from a coma. The Russia connection is a given. The Trumpanzees have been coming up with multiple explanations of why they've been dealing with the Reds for a few months now. Time to get up to speed.

  • @missybarbour6885
    @missybarbour6885 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    THANK YOU WHOEVER POSTED THE WHOLE MONOLOGUE AS ONE VIDEO

  • @chrismason947
    @chrismason947 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    "Witch hunt", Nixon July 20, 1972.

  • @smurfette1509
    @smurfette1509 6 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    I don't know why I'm not a bigger fan of Stephen Colbert because he's good, really good.

    • @nicstr28
      @nicstr28 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Probably because his humor seriously lacks any resemblance of facts or humor. He's a tiny piss ant....a mama's boy...just like Richard Simmons. Pretty sad because he could actually be funny if his joke had any fact to them. Jokes about imaginary crap aren't funny to anyone except the uninformed liberal....but they aren't interested in facts if you just say what they want to hear. He's playing your ads and making$$$ on it😂🤣😂😂
      You do know one of his and his wife's best friends are Martha Mcallum and her husband? Staunch conservatives? Did you know that🤣😂🤣😂 he's getting rich off dumbasses like you.

    • @Mrwhite-u3g
      @Mrwhite-u3g 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Nik str, obviously you haven't seen the Washington press club address by Colbert. Bigger balls than most.

  • @p.bamygdala2139
    @p.bamygdala2139 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    ...”has many people inside of him.”
    Literally choked on my soup, laughing.
    :-)

  • @TheReal008Zulu
    @TheReal008Zulu 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Don Jr.: I cannot recall so much, that I can tell you exactly what I don't recall.
    Trump: Don... don't, Don, no...

    • @TheReal008Zulu
      @TheReal008Zulu 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      He has leaked info which has made things worse...

  • @russellcampbell9198
    @russellcampbell9198 6 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    Maybe if we waterboard Don Jr. ... just a thought.

    • @janicek9399
      @janicek9399 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      russell campbell good point, waterboard all of them, start at the top......

    • @Chunkboi
      @Chunkboi 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Depends on what kind of ‘water’ you plan to use.

    • @JamesSmith-bb3tm
      @JamesSmith-bb3tm 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      russell campbell I agree with Janice K. WATERBOARD ALL OF THEM STARTING AT THE TOP or as dRUMP said I'D DO MORE THAN WATER BOARD. DON SR. QUOTE.

    • @Areanyusernamesleft
      @Areanyusernamesleft 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      On the one hand, I believe that using waterboarding to gather reliable information is ineffective, not to mention unethical and immoral.
      On the other hand, the current Administration seems to have no qualms with it... :p

    • @Chunkboi
      @Chunkboi 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      James Smith maybe add some LSD to the water...it might make Trump more coherent.

  • @lemonielala3080
    @lemonielala3080 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    "Worst case scenario Simon Cowell" 👌👌👌😂😂

  • @ezra55595
    @ezra55595 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That joke about the nesting dolls had me rolling.

  • @sth02
    @sth02 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    That Don Jr. impression is golden. "DAMMIT. I forgot the garlic knots..."

  • @twonumber22
    @twonumber22 6 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    *Guilty as sin.*

  • @BlakieTT
    @BlakieTT 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    HEY! It's one big video! Thanks, editor :>

  • @ctrlaltdestroy91
    @ctrlaltdestroy91 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    9:53 Expert use of the Flashdance song there, Jon :)

  • @claireconover
    @claireconover 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Colbert running across the screen always makes me laugh

  • @emily-8252
    @emily-8252 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I legitimately couldn't get through this without Stephen Colbert

  • @Drace90
    @Drace90 6 ปีที่แล้ว +222

    #StupidWatergate

    • @corrinejoy3571
      @corrinejoy3571 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Drace90 #ReallyStupidWatergate

  • @theempires5
    @theempires5 6 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Consuming too much Keebler Elf cookie, DJR?

  • @ProjectFlashlight612
    @ProjectFlashlight612 6 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Gangsters in charge of the country

  • @no3namesalike
    @no3namesalike 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Stephen, I love you, but I and all the other Russian speakers watching are collectively screaming at our screens right now: it's pronounced, in its simplest and most anglicized form, "MAH-TREE-YOH-SHKA" not "muh-trew-ska". I'm crying over here, darling.

  • @xxx6555
    @xxx6555 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Colbert is brilliant.

  • @misspumpkinQueen1375
    @misspumpkinQueen1375 6 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Is it Mueller time yet?

    • @jeremeerxleben6671
      @jeremeerxleben6671 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sondra Zimmerly Mueller is the biggest criminal out there, fuk that deepstate piece of shit

    • @davidcici11Evolution
      @davidcici11Evolution 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      jereme Erxleben trumptard alert

    • @williamjackson5942
      @williamjackson5942 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jereme, what a sad lil fool you are. SAD!

    • @jeremeerxleben6671
      @jeremeerxleben6671 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      William Jackson you all are sad watching this bull shit

  • @roseliekane1060
    @roseliekane1060 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Oh, please , pleeeeaase! Please keep Giuliani on and continue to let him speak with cameras rolling and audio on.

  • @oogachaka3447
    @oogachaka3447 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Great genes at work right here, folks!

  • @mariajosequezada3148
    @mariajosequezada3148 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You outdid yourself!! Best monologue So farr 👏 hilarious

  • @thebookkeeper8404
    @thebookkeeper8404 6 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    The word IS NOT collusion. The Word IS CONSPIRACY!!! USE IT.

    • @amnonmeyers6946
      @amnonmeyers6946 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Right. Collusion is not a crime. Conspiracy against the US is a serious crime. Conspiracy to undermine an election as well.

    • @rohe4077
      @rohe4077 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I agree. It's actually treason. He's working with foreign powers to undermind the country. And trump and his supporters brag about being patriotic. Stunningly stupid amount of non-self-reflection.

  • @scn5530
    @scn5530 6 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    Toilet Burgers: The full-circle experience

    • @mikebockey4125
      @mikebockey4125 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      i’d say that there’s a pretty good chance that the man has sat on the pot eating his cheeseburger before
      i just don’t want the visual

    • @getlost4666
      @getlost4666 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Full circle more like a split moon 🌙

    • @Chunkboi
      @Chunkboi 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Too grownup for Trump. This is more his speed: dolphinsilverwolf.deviantart.com/art/This-is-what-we-voted-for-Trump-Parody-622984317

  • @blu4085
    @blu4085 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    That face though..when he says Natalia...... ;D))

  • @outseeker
    @outseeker 6 ปีที่แล้ว +179

    taking the jeff sessions approach to guilt eh? well it seemed to work for him, so why not i suppose.

    • @alleycatgillis1964
      @alleycatgillis1964 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      outseeker if I'm ever in a courtroom, I'm going to try this approach.

    • @CanItAlready
      @CanItAlready 6 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Ronald Reagan said "I don't recall" or "I can't remember" 88 times during 8 hours of deposition on the Iran-contra affair. Rear Admiral Poindexter said the same thing 184 times over 5 days of questioning on the same matter. Ah, tradition.

    • @deadfreightwest5956
      @deadfreightwest5956 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      + CSharp - Excellent point. Well, there you go again. The wheel turns, but it makes my head spin.

    • @Lucius1958
      @Lucius1958 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      CSharp: The nostalgia is overwhelming...

    • @thereaction18
      @thereaction18 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Alley Cat Gillis Don't forget the depositions before you even get to court. Very important.

  • @andrewowens4421
    @andrewowens4421 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I just love the way Stephen says her name, "Natalia Veselnitskaya."

  • @freerehab2848
    @freerehab2848 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    With ALL honesty, I never thought I would live to see this.

  • @SweetLilWren
    @SweetLilWren 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Great monologue!

  • @leroy450
    @leroy450 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    😂 😂 Colbert you’re a maniac 😂

  • @formernewyorker5393
    @formernewyorker5393 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hilarious, brilliant and savage! Colbert and his writers are awesome 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • @Mandinko23
    @Mandinko23 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Ilove the piano piece at the end its so melencholy and beautiful

  • @misskrissification
    @misskrissification 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for putting the whole monologue up in one vid!!

  • @vdinh143
    @vdinh143 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    These presidential impressions are outstanding

  • @mikeobrien9829
    @mikeobrien9829 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    "I DO NOT RECALL" is the same as PLEADING THE FIFTH, what it really means is "I'm not going to tell you because it will incriminate me" DO WE NEED ANY MORE PROOF OF COLLUSION BETWEEN TRUMP AND RUSSIA!!!

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Mike OBrien I believe it is not evidence in and of itself to prove guilt.

    • @mikeobrien9829
      @mikeobrien9829 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      George B. Wolffsohn; The question is IF THERE IS NOTHING TO HIDE WHY LIE OR CONVENIENTLY FORGET??? Just the FACT that they LIE and have MENTAL LAPSES when asked questions is an admission of guilt. I never heard a INNOCENT PERSON LIE FOR A ALIBI OR FORGET THINGS THAT PROVE THEM INNOCENT, that makes no sense at all!!

    • @priscillajimenez27
      @priscillajimenez27 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Trump even said pleading the fifth meant you're guilty.

    • @mikeobrien9829
      @mikeobrien9829 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Priscilla Jimenez, You are RIGHT, TRUMP ALSO SAID that "ONLY THE MOB" plead the 5th!!!

  • @budrick2003
    @budrick2003 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This is going to be a classic monologue

  • @snoopy0822
    @snoopy0822 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love how they play Thelonious Monk's "Evidence" after the joke at 8:50.

  • @morganbeirne2804
    @morganbeirne2804 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Stephen’s on fire...love this.

  • @ChristheMad
    @ChristheMad 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    There's an epidemic of selective memory going on...

  • @paulramos4037
    @paulramos4037 6 ปีที่แล้ว +405

    Donald Jr.: "I do not recall" my daddy treated me like my sister Ivanka.

    • @maxhydekyle2425
      @maxhydekyle2425 6 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      He fucked him too?

    • @smurfette1509
      @smurfette1509 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I want to see Chelsea beat the crap out of Ivanka (God, to think they're still friends).

    • @BothHands1
      @BothHands1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      That's pretty fucked up to joke about...

    • @WolfkinNorthclaw
      @WolfkinNorthclaw 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      So Trump wants to fuck him to?

    • @thereaction18
      @thereaction18 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Paul Ramos OK, I hate you but I appreciate the quality of the joke. Even though it's bullsit. What's really funny is the first idiot to reply actually believed you. God, scrolling down just makes me lose faith in humanity on this site. There's more idiots. Holy shit. It's time for the purge. Unleash the Right Wing Death Squads!

  • @paxvesania2008
    @paxvesania2008 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    I do not recall the presidency being a joke that it is.
    Anyone recall any of this?
    I don't.

    • @williamcasey4049
      @williamcasey4049 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      well, there were a lot of people sneering at Reagan back in the day.
      the "cowboy actor", but it pretty well stopped after Libya got bombed....

    • @georgeb.wolffsohn30
      @georgeb.wolffsohn30 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Misericordia well, at the time we knew it couldn't get any worse than Dubbya. Damn ! Were we wrong.

    • @jstravelers4094
      @jstravelers4094 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      George B. Wolffsohn At least with W, we had Cheney. Not at all a fan of his. However, there was an intellectual presence there.
      We now have a complete lunatic at the helm.

    • @macgeek2004
      @macgeek2004 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +Js Travelers Cheney was a fucking MONSTER though. Or need I remind you about the use of black site and torture, due to his whims?

    • @jstravelers4094
      @jstravelers4094 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      macgeek2004 I said I was no fan. The bar was set very low.
      Very low.
      As bad as he was, he was sane. That's the difference.

  • @rockinchild234
    @rockinchild234 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this is the good stuff, when stephen doesn't hold back its just savage

  • @koolkollect
    @koolkollect 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Colbert killed me on this one!! I'm dead, good-byeeee cruel world! lmao

  • @aquamarinedream8304
    @aquamarinedream8304 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Stephen's on fire today..

  • @CodingToFreedom
    @CodingToFreedom 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    By now, and as a German happily watching this disaster from the sidelines I must say I find myself enjoying this more and more. It's like witnessing something unique, like those 2012 apocalypse parties where everyone had a perfect excuse to do the dumbest shit ever and laugh about it should we all survive.

  • @Tocsin-Bang
    @Tocsin-Bang 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Jr. is an even worse liar than Snr.

  • @CalliopeCarina
    @CalliopeCarina 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I always love when ‘Natalya Veselnitskya’ (dun dun!) gets a mention!

  • @Shane-sp8lg
    @Shane-sp8lg 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The writing on this show is so good!!!

  • @QuantumBraced
    @QuantumBraced 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Classic logical ambiguity. "If there had been collusion, they would have used it" -- can be interpreted to mean "the fact they didn't use it means they didn't intend to collude" (how Giuliani meant it) or "if they'd had a chance to collude, they would have used it" -- how Stephen meant it. Fun stuff.

    • @thomasschmitz5072
      @thomasschmitz5072 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      yeah, i'm going to try that next time! "i tried to buy drugs, but they didn't have any, oh well, can i keep on trying to buy drugs again then?" line of defense...

    • @MrArtVein
      @MrArtVein 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sounds like you are well versed in syllogisms my friend

    • @thomasschmitz5072
      @thomasschmitz5072 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      so according to YOU, attempting a crime, attempting to meet AND meeting with our adversaries is not a crime, illegal or collusion or treason? never mind, we are ALL suppose to believe THEM, that they didn't take the info or used it? are we all suppose to believe too that it's the world's biggest coincidence that nearly every single person in trump's orbit just happened to meet with our adversary russia? and forgot about it, can't remember, lie about what the circumstances were and change their stories as well?!..

    • @thomasschmitz5072
      @thomasschmitz5072 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      no, they didn't like or get the info they received according to you and them, and didn't use it (and we know they didn't use it because that is what they said? never mind, the changing stories of what the meetings were about, the amnesia about the meeting itself, the lying on their forms and so on, and we are ALL suppose to believe anything they say? really?) how about addressing the fact that THEY MET WITH THESE PEOPLE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!!!!!!! AND DIDN'T RUN LITERALLY RUN BEFOREHAND TO TELL THE PROPER AUTHORITIES! (like everyone else would obviously INHERENTLY know to do!) but according to you, that means nothing, the fact that they didn't use the info (according to them that is) means nothing???? whew! who knew! when you attempt a crime/illegal activity as long as you don't actually go thru with it then it's all good! so in your mind attempted rape, attempted robbery, attempted murder, planned "whatever" means nothing and it's all legal and ethical! uh huh!...

    • @thomasschmitz5072
      @thomasschmitz5072 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      EXACTLY! WHEN HAS HE (trump) EVER EVER EVER ACTED REMOTELY LIKE SOMEONE INNOCENT AND WITH NOTHING TO HIDE?!.. WHAT'S the last defense "oh, but they weren't politicians and so they didn't know any better, it's not their fault! the dog ate the homework"!!!!!!!!!????? when has he ever said "i have nothing to hide, i and no one around me did anything illegal or unethical, investigate me all you want, and so on?" NEVER!.. HE REEKS OF GUILT AND/OR IS LITERALLY TERRIFIED IN REGARDS TO HIS ACTUAL LIFE SOMETHING/SOMETHINGS BEING REVEALED TO THE WORLD!...

  • @vissidarte7vissidarte758
    @vissidarte7vissidarte758 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    A Few Good Men - Mueller, Comey, Rosenstein, FBI, DOJ.

  • @tolbaszy8067
    @tolbaszy8067 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    It's time to end the investigation- and start prosecuting!

  • @EnriquePascual1989
    @EnriquePascual1989 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Best yet! Thanks Stephan for your POV!

  • @cubangal1
    @cubangal1 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    "I don't use Rubbers"......ooooh Stephen!!!!!!tooo funny monologue!!!!as usual!!!!!love ya from Canada...Have a great long weekend!!!!!!!!