Addiction is a life-long battle and she's skating on really thin ice with the way she's approaching recovery here. The fact that her mom is so confident in her sobriety is really troubling. And with her former assistant saying "she knows her limits"... that could not be farther from the truth. Her team is not helping her!
that wasn't her friend, it wâs her former assistant, the one who found her passed out, naked in the bed the one who called 911, the one who watched her turn fully blue, the one who said, she has never seen anything so scary... the one, without there wouldn't be a Demi anymore, that same person, yes.
@@selinapoochie She knows as much as Demi has exposed, and what she exposed (that she didn’t have to) is enough to detail that she is skating thin and there are many standing by... watching. She’s a walking disaster.
@@southernsoul152 Yes, exactly. I'm not a psychologist (nor did I claim to be); all I did was agree with the Dr.'s comments on what he saw in the video and talked about them according to my interpretation and experience.
In Mac Miller’s last music video he wrote Memento Mori (meaning “remember that you must die”) inside the casket he was laying in. The song was about him thinking he would stay sober. He then overdosed on heroin. “Dancing with the Devil” is Demi’s memento mori
I don’t want to edit my comment cause it’ll take away “psychology in Seattle’s” heart, but for anyone interested the song I am referring to is called “Self Care” by Mac Miller
When I was watching I thought the earlier episodes with her recounting her OD were going to be the hardest parts to watch but it was actually the later episodes that had me cringing and in fear the most. I just get a really bad feeling hearing Demi, her family, friends, and team talk about everything.
The problem is there's lots of people making her look good and healthy while living of her narrative profits. Unfortunally I can't believe this people will look after her when they can loose millions of dollars.
Thank you for bringing up the Amy Winehouse comparison. I remember when the song Rehab came out I kept yelling at the radio, "Go to rehab! If people love you enough to say you need to go, you need to go." After her death, I just change the station when the song comes on. Can't listen knowing how it all turned out. Wish that song could come on and I could say, "So glad you finally went to rehab and were able to get healthy." It's why I haven't listened to "Dancing with the Devil" brings me back in the same way.
as her mom said Demi was present when she saw the abuse her father did to her mom, she saw her mom struggling with eating disorder and self-medicating with drugs, so this was normal for her and unfortunately she found comfort on what her dad chose over her family: alcohol
Yes is like she never help her deal with sadness or negative feelings. Being able to be sad is a skill you have to teach your children. Sometimes when I cry I feel weak but after watching this I am happy I am able to be sad and miserable and then as all humans slowly rebuild and be happy again
I can’t help but wonder how that must be for Demi to caretake all the people around her who want so badly to believe she has everything under control. They all seem like they really want and need to believe that, and they need Demi to reassure them this time will be different. Maybe often. That’s a lot of pressure in itself; and subtle, constant stress that she may not even be aware of. Maybe it would be a relief for her to have someone be honest and say: I don’t buy that you have it under control and it’s also okay that you don’t.
Your comment made me cry. I feel this way in my life right now. I thank God my best friend told me this recently. She's seen me through it all....some people don't even have 1 person so I'm grateful I have her but it still is just a lot to receive the pressure from nearly all other ends of the earth.
Maybe she's in denial as a way to cope with the stress and anxiety... I feel bad for Demi and for everyone around her who loves her and wants her safe and healthy.
@@Dash120z you have to remember that this isn't demi's first relapse or things that are related to addiction. as someone who has dealt with a family member who is an addict, everyday you can see them on drugs or how they act & over time you're able to handle it without breaking down and crying, instead you deal with it while it's happening and you cry later. i hope that makes sense because it's something i can't really put into words.
Another perfect documentary of what addicts say when they are setting themselves up for yet another relapse. She works hard everyday to be able to meet her alcohol count ( only 2 drinks tonight..only 2 drinks tonight...tiny little bit of THC) so that she can believe she is normal and "balanced". I hope she is one of the rare occasions.
The alcohol is going to be the issue or the catalyst for more drugs. She says in the documentary she was drinking wine and 30 minutes later she's calling for drugs. Also she has already struggled with alcoholism. As Elton said, this moderation therapy doesn't work
I’m an alcoholic in recovery and my “best friend” would say the same things to me. She would say “you’re not an alcoholic because you don’t drink every day” which was technically true. I would take a 24 hour break. And then drink for 7 days straight. I wouldn’t go to work drunk. Until I did.
Everyone was saying that my uncle (32yo) was better because he wasn't as bad as before. In a way since nobody saw him getting worse they didn't feel he needed urgent help. He just overdosed last night and my grandma is the one that found him. He didn't make it.
I'm worried for her too. My sister-in-law swore up and down that she was okay until she drank so much that she fell off the stairs and into a coma that she never woke up from. I distance myself from addicts as well because the potential to lose someone else due to drugs and alcohol is too much to deal with.
@@eileensnow6153 hm its kind of hard to pin it down but just her perspective (the little part we've seen at least) seems to come from a self centered/naive place. The way she talks reminds me of my own mother, not emotionally invested or mature in a "motherly way". It seems like she just goes with whatever demi says and doesn't question it although she obviously should. Also the fact that she put her daughter in the spotlight from a very young age doesn't really sit right with me. Dont know their relationship but i wouldn't be surprised if it was difficult. But of course thats just my perspective and i could be completely wrong.:)
„I saw those bloody rags that morning. Despite the alarms that went off in my head, we pushed the incident aside. There wasn‘t time for talking. As demi raced to the studio out one door, I left through another to take Madison, my youngest, to the set of desperate housewifes.“ - Demi‘s mom
That point about stories being written into lyrics reminds me so much of “Heavy” and Chester Bennington. I didn’t know about the album until I saw the news about his passing on Twitter (of all places), and I listened to the whole thing that night. You could tell he was suffering, especially after Chris Cornell’s own suicide, through the lyrics of that entire album. Further, if Demi would’ve died that day, her last songs would’ve been Sober (and Anyone, if it were to be released posthumously). Cries for help, clear as day. I truly hope that this album isn’t leading up to the same sort of fate.
I feel like her former assistant, Jordan, was definitely circumventing her true feelings. Right after she said Demi "knows her limits", she then says "and I know her." Which I think most people took as her meaning I know her and trust her. But there was something about the way Jordan said that, and then shealmost smiling and chuckling to herself that leads me to believe she doesn't have a lot of faith. That "and I know her" felt more like a "and I know her, and what she's capable of because I've seen it first hand" but I could be completely off base. Oh man, at the end of the day- fuck addiction. It's just su
This is the tragic thing with these celebrities: their team often doesn’t care about the human but only see them as a money maker. Countless young stars have died because they have been pushed way beyond their limits. This should be a question of human rights😔🙏🏼
Her previous team had her a psychiatrist, life coach, sober coach, sober companions, therapists, nutritionists, personal trainers, etc. and Demi went on national television blasting them cause “tHey KePt tElliNg Me wHat To dO” That means Demi herself isn’t ready to be healthy. Period. Her teams cannot be blamed “only see her as a money maker”. NO. She has all the access and help in the world helped and provided by BY HER TEAM and Demi just DOESNT WANT IT. Stop treating her like a helpless money maker machine. She’s a 30 year old adult. Give her the responsibility.
@@bleudiamondbleu although I agree with what you said about her taking responsibility if you look more into the specific things her old team did, it rlly was fucked up. i mean if ppl did the stuff to me that they did to her, id be miserable too. like idk about you, but I don't think a sober coach should be telling you you're selfish for hitting an all time low and wanting help.
@@bleudiamondbleu her old team made the assistant feel guilty for attempting to call 911... had she not called Demi would have died. Don't praise that crap team. She needs those people again but better. Like Dr. Honda said, there's a lot of therapist/coaches that think they know what they're doing but they don't. Addicts have to want help, they cannot be forced into getting it.
@@thisismecindy you are technically wrong. The assistant never said her TEAM would make her feel bad for calling 911. She said generally “I didn’t wanna get in trouble”. For all we know that could mean in trouble from Demi herself. We all know how she reacted the last time she was snitched on for using (punched a backup dancer). There’s no telling with an addict and the assistant ever specified who she’d be in trouble with. That’s all :) x
She actually had a team before this one that was on top of her recovery throughout her entire career. They didn't approve of her drinking which is why she fired them (or they dropped her) before her overdose. They seemed to have forced her into recovery which isn't a great approach but they definitely cared about her and had her best interest with a lot of professional recovery people around her. Eventually, I think they just had to walk away and distance themselves from someone who they cared so much about. I highly recommend watching her older documentary to compare! These videos are really insightful and I appreciate learning from you!
That’s not why she dropped them. She was struggling with her eating disorder at the time and she asked them for help and they told her she wasn’t sick enough. She struggled for 6 months and they abandoned her when she was struggling with it. She was very miserable so she relapsed. They were very controlling of her and what she ate. It was really bad
@@lucasfelipe024 a management team doesn't have the power to control her like this though...like legally they don't. What they CAN possibly have control over is career-related things due to contracts and such so I don't understand this narrative she's spinning about some of these claims.
@@mikemoffett6499 Controlling what she ate is not okay but as even she has said recently, they had her best interest. That being said, they legally cannot control her food and such and they can't control her wanting to go get help for her struggles. They are a management team....for her career. If you watched her old documentary, you know that they were ready to walk away from her at the time. The only difference is that this time, they did. And in my opinion, they had every right to distance themselves.
"If you are a big fan of Demi, which I am guessing you are if you are watching this..." haha I barely know her, I am a big fan of this channel, and would watch anything that Kirk makes a commentary video of :D
She wrote a song called ‘sober’ right before the night of the OD and it’s about how she’s sorry she’s not sober anymore. Now she wrote ‘dancing with the devil’ and I’m scared
The song dancing with the devil is about her drinking and doing drugs before her OD. It’s about her past. Not the journey she’s on now. If you wanna hear that then listen to California sober on her new album. Or the whole album as it is the journey she’s been on since she ODed until now.
Demi's mom is in complete denial, she believes that nothing that Demi could now could put her back to the ICU but what if it sends her straight to her grave then ??
I’m curious to know what your take is on her whole FroYo controversy. While I understand and empathize with her overall message, to be it just signaled more that she is not used to hearing the word “no” or to receiving push back, and it makes me worry about what it means for her recovery.
As someone who has addicts in their family, the most concerning part was her not taking responsibility for her actions. One of the things you learn with addicts is that not taking responsibility is a big indicator they are about to relapse or have. I hope her family and team take it as a huge red flag and do what they can to ensure her appropriate care team is notified of possible issues. You can't make an addict do anything but part of not enabling them is pointing out when their behavior is troubling.
@@pigpjs yes, her family and team would benefit from going to Al-Anon or CoDa meetings. I feel they are still in the stage where they are afraid of telling her no or drawing boundaries because they’re afraid it might anger her which may trigger her to use and they don’t realize this just enables the addicts behavior (whether they are using or not a person can still act as they were when they were using).
I can’t make my friends stop drinking alcohol around me. In my world, I would have to get a new set of friends. For her, people will change for her. In fact, people’s livelihoods revolve around her. It’s a pretty interesting contrast between worlds.
I commented in your video before, but I was really thrown by her froyo fiasco, and im really struggling to see her pov. I was hoping you could react to her apology, i think it would help us empathize a little with her
@@makddl I think your statement is kinda dismissive. If someone feels a certain way towards something, it shouldn't be invalidated. The OP is looking for Dr. Kirks clarification, not yours. I don't think there's an issue with that.
@@makddl i don’t think it’s the talking about triggers so much as destroying a small business over them. These things can be handled privately, she seemed to react really weirdly. Especially since the options that triggered her were there for more than just ‘dieting’ reasons. People with diabetes and celiac etc often go for sugar free options. Blasting this little mom and pop froyo on a public platform in front of millions for carrying these products seemed really irrational when she could just as easily have gotten the point across through contacting the store privately to complain and talking more broadly about how terminology like ‘ guilt free’ should go away. It’s different from the average joe leaving the average Yelp review, when you’re a celebrity and you blast a place on your Twitter, you might be putting it in the red.
@@makddl froyo is seen as a “low cal” treat and a trigger for some people (including Demi, she said it in her “apology”). So she went to go get a trigger food, got triggered by something else in the store, then blamed being triggered on the small business instead of herself. Also, the world is full of triggers, and it’s on the individual (instead of society like Demi thinks) to take care of themselves. I say this as someone who suffered from self harm and disordered eating and has plenty of their own triggers to worry about.
@@makddl In therapy, something I learned is that I am not able to control my triggers, but I am able to control how I react/respond to them. In fact, the only thing I can control in my life is my decisions and how I react/respond to things. That is it! Her going off on the yogurt shop, to me, seemed like her trying to control things she can't, and trying to deflect from taking charge of her response/reactions.
I'm not a therapist but I agree with everything he says, I learn so much by watching this. I really hope she doesn't die. It looks like it might happen so as he said we have to prepare
As someone who had 4 siblings 3 of whom are addicts, and one who overdosed and died I really think this is leading to another tragedy and its definitely upsetting and worrying.
Not sure if this has been mentioned since i did miss a few episodes but does anyone think it's awful that her security team let her drug dealer on the property at all...I guess at the end of the day she pays them so she could just fire them if they got in the way of her drugs :/
It sounds like they weren’t on site 24/7. She called him at 5 in the morning, and it sounds like her assistant and chef were the first ones there in the morning and found her OD’ing. Her assistant called head of security… so yeah, not sure.
I understand the weed thing, but alcohol is a slippery effing slope. That substance does NO good to anyone. She really, REALLY needs to be living a normal life without the pressures of celebricy. I hope she finds her path.
This is exactly what I said! I know weed has helped a lot of addicts get off of hard drugs so I’m not too worried about that. But I’ve never heard of an addict successfully drinking in moderation without moving onto harder things. Alcohol already impairs your judgment as it is, it’s just all around a really really bad idea. I’m so worried for her and I hope she knows what she’s doing
@@gnicole13 exactly. Alcohol use is a social phenomenon. It is unnecessary. Weed on the other hand can have outstandingly positive affects, for both addicts and non addicts alike. It's a good leeway between complete sobriety and full blown addiction. But alcohol... no, its dumb, its harmful, addicts should stay away from it That said I do know addicts who use in moderation now while staying away from the harder stuff. But given demis history, I dont think she is this type of person, and if she is it is WAY too premature. She is not done her healing.
It's poignant to remember that Amy W. was in rehab and seemingly doing well when she died. Demi L. seems to be in even worse shape having had multiple strokes and a heart attack already. Opiate addiction is no joke. Those medications that block the receptors or work like Methadone have serious side effects and alcohol use is known to have potentially deadly interactions like causing heart attacks. It's really scary to hear her say it's OK for her to drink.
Yes! So many parallels here. Most people don't know she hadn't touched drugs for a good 6 months before she died. Like Demi, she had people around here who didn't have her best interest at heart.
Ya it's a bit unconventional but I think we all want it to work for her! Only thing I would say is I hope her team/family realizes that she is an addict and chosing either moderation or abstinence will be an every day struggle. I hope they are realistic with her so that the addiction doesn't sabotage her out of nowhere. It seems like she was attempting to do the moderation technique for a while before she overdosed. But ofc we want to pray and believe this time it's really different and she can do this!
@@cty1037 before she overdosed the first day she started drinking was the same day she picked up a lot of drugs. So she wasn’t really doing moderation but that was what she was telling her friends about. Also abstinence and moderation are both very difficult and hard paths. People relapse at any path in recovery so really there’s not a much more risky. All paths are risky but valid
The approach she's taking is what saved my life after years and years of the relapse/recovery cycle. I've been "California sober" for 13 years (I've had shockingly similar experiences to hers), and have a beautiful life now. I'm so grateful I gave up the black and white, all or nothing mindset.
@@mikemoffett6499 I can't remember the last time, but yes, I've had alcohol in the last 13 years. I don't really have any desire to drink, so it's the occasional glass of wine here or there over the years.
Thank you so much for this series. I've been a Demi fan since i was just a teen and she really was the first public person i hear talk about depression and self harm, and truly made me feel less alone. But watching this documentary left me with a bitter taste and i wasn't sure why, now I understand. So thank you for telling the truth even though it might be hard, and for preparing us for the possiblity of a relapse, it;s kind of silly but I felt kinda guilty distancing myself for her. Idk.
These videos on Demi have helped me see how much more help I really need and that I am deserving of it, and have been motivating to go out and get it so I want to send my sincerest gratitude.
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I truly, deeply appreciate your work on rising awareness of mental health by creating this channel. Thank you so much!
It's definitely haunting to watch this reaction a full year later, knowing that Demi has returned to rehab in 2022 and they have now admitted that "sober sober" is the only way to be for them. Thankfully they have now seemed to realize this and gotten further treatment. Of course we don't know intimate personal details about said treatment but they have now committed to complete abstinence and I am so hopeful that they stick with it. One thing that I do think Demi did really right is that they shared their story, no matter how flawed the thinking about the whole "california sober" thing is, because it puts a face to these issues such as addiction, eating disorders, sexual assault, etc and humanizes it in a way and gets people to talk about it because, though it's not fair and obviously causes them a lot of pressure, being a public figure does make you some kind of "role model" whether you want it to or not. I am definitely glad that they at least said that "just because this is what I am doing that doesn't mean it will work for you" as well as including Elton John's 30 year strong sobriety perspective even though it did not align with their views at this point in their recovery journey. On a personal level, a lot of my own story is very similar to Demi's in regards to traumatic upbringing with continuing traumas later in life, sexual abuse, self esteem and body dysmorphia issues, self harm, and substance abuse issues. When the "Dancing with the Devil" album and documentary came out I was in the throws of active addiction and being a fan of Demi since their Disney days (I am only 5 years younger than them so I definitely grew up alongside them in a way) I without question wanted to give this docuseries and the album a view and listen. Just hearing just how bad their overdose was, how it effected those around them and their life, how critical and dangerous the health ramifications were, and how open and honest they were about their struggles - it encouraged me to get help, because I was able to empathize with them, someone I have deeply supported, respected and cared about for many years now, in a way I was not able to do so with myself; The problematic "california sober" views not even mattering in my case, because I was able to find a program with people that have really schooled me in the way that addiction works to know better than to use "soft" drugs. I can only pray to whatever powers that be that others are able to do the same for themselves and not take the "california sobriety" thing as a hard and fast rule at the risk of their lives, but when it comes down to it, it is very true that everyone's journey is their own, but I will be forever grateful for Demi's hand in helping me begin mine and I will always be rooting for them.
I feel like after her od I’ve distanced myself and mentally prepared for the worst, especially after this documentary. Demi and I are the same age and I have watched her since I was 14 and have grown up with her music, the same with Miley, so even though I’m just a fan it’s hard to watch all this happen. It’s like watching a friend dig their own grave.
When Cory Monteith overdosed I was not prepared at all and that hit me harder than I imagined! It’s so crazy how much celebrities affect us, what a strange thing
you can't do the same things over and over again and expect different results. How are people around her so blind that they can't see it? Her addicted self made sure to sorround her with enablers this time, and it's very dangerous.
What do you consider early recovery? what we are seeing is a 2 year filming, her overdose was 3 tears ago in total in 2018. 3 years isnt the longest time but i feel from your speech youre referring to a maybe a year?
I'm not a psychologist, but when I hear him say "early recovery," I assume he's talking about a mindset more than a timeframe. Demi presents as someone who is still very raw, is still still healing and at the moment doesn't seem very good at regulating / managing her emotions in a healthy way. She uses marijuana and alcohol to soothe her emotions, but still lashes out in public. I've listened to a few celebrity addicts in late stage recovery talk about their addiction and they sound very different. That being said...those addicts I've listened to, with the exception of relapses, have been completely sober for 10+ years. Also, Demi relapsed after her big overdose. So it's probably been less than three years of her California sobriety.
This is terrifying. Truly terrifying. I was friends with someone who battled exactly these demons. She also OD’d on heroin. She was technically dead for several minutes and they brought her back. Her OD resulted in permanent brain damage. She conquered the eating disorder..mostly. But the substance struggles and the depression that resulted from the OD never dissipated. She tried to kill herself so many times I lost count. She did exactly what Demi’s sister talks about here - came back from the brink time and time again. Until she didn’t. After her father died in 2010, she spiraled into depression. She had ECT. She had ketamine infusions. She went inpatient for a year and a half. Six months after she left the hospital in 2015, she bought drugs - presumably heroin - and committed suicide. I think about what she’d say if she were listening to demi (she was brilliant and studying to be a psychiatrist, ironically enough) - she’d say Demi is delusional. She’d say she’s playing with fire. She’d say everyone around her is enabling her. And I know that life - while my friend was inpatient, my husband was struggling with addiction and suicidal ideation. I told myself we were out of the woods time and time and time again. I lost my best friend at the same time that I was afraid I was going to lose my husband to the same demons. It was another three years before he hit a point of stability that was actually real. We’d been together by that time for fourteen years. He’d struggled with substance abuse issues the entirety of our relationship. He can’t even listen to things about Demi right now - not because it triggers him but because he knows she’s lying to herself. As someone who ends up being the sober rock to people with addictive personalities (not a substance person myself - depression, anxiety, ED-NOS/anorexia, ADHD, and formerly borderline personality that were all misdiagnosed as bipolar disorder early on), it’s fucking brutal to hear the things she’s saying and that the people around her are saying. I’ve been down that road so many times. They’re nowhere near being out of the woods. The similarities between her and my friend are gut wrenching. If anyone was smart enough and tough enough to beat all of this, it was my best friend. And she still succumbed to it in the end. I’m very worried for her. I’m worried for her family. You can’t believe an addict at this juncture - it’s not logical or possible to believe them. They have to earn that trust back again. I’m only JUST at the point of being able to trust what my husband tells me again. And even then it comes with a massive grain of salt because addiction will always been a dynamic we deal with. I know how powerful the need to believe them is. I know it too well. But god..this is frightening.
I wonder if she's not talking about NA, AA, or OA because I believe they ask you not broadcast you're in the program. Not out of shame but for the anonymous part.
Maybe, but if she’s publicly admitting to drinking and smoking pot I doubt those groups would continue to support her. Not in a judgmental way but because it goes against their whole message and process.
The anonymous part of AA/NA doesn't refer to you unless you want it to. It applies to not outing other people and not sharing anyone's business about what they share in meetings.
Her friends and parents themselves need therapy or Alanon. They are just as wrapped up in her addiction and cycles as she is. Denial is a very easy way to cope inwardly and outwardly and also the stakes are different for the "non-celebrity" addict families. Stakes are similar but different as well. These people depend on her as much as she depends on drugs. I heard a bunch of deflection and blaming. Hence why the 12 steps are wrote and done in a particular way. Amends are not done for quite some time. Abstinence from all mind and mood altering substances to clear way to complete the 12 steps... this documetary will outlive Demi if she continues her path sadly....
Does anyone else notice that Demi is high during this documentary? I mean, allegedly high. I have addicts in my family. I’m painfully aware of what it looks like.
Is she on Naltrexone? Naltrexone can be overridden, but the amount you need to feel high is enough to kill someone. It happened to my friend. As an alcoholic, I drank on it because it wasn’t necessarily about the feeling I got, it was the process I was hooked on I think. Sorry if this has been addressed all rest. This is the first I have learned of her and first time watching this
I’m a big fan of Demi and have been since her Disney channel days and I just pray for the best for her 💖 I don’t think this California sober moderation thing is a good idea and I am very worried for her. I can’t believe her mom isn’t worried at all! I feel like all parents worry about their kids even if they don’t struggle with addictions. Especially Demi because like the doc said she is really good at hiding her struggles. It would be great if you commented on the froyo situation Dr Honda! It even shocked me as a big fan of her.
I hope he doesn’t comment on the froyo she was very triggered, her words, got twisted, fake screen shots made to make her look worse, hella TH-cam videos, thousands of horrible vile comment....... people acting like she murdered the shops family. Let’s move on she’s human
@@alyssahomen3753 that’s true! I was kind of curious about her mental state which is why I wanted Dr Honda’s take but I agree! She was super triggered and I hope she is working on her triggers and we can all move on 💕
I am currently doing Buddhist 12 steps (I don’t believe in God) and coda meetings and therapy. I wish I had the means to afford half the specialists you recommended during this series but unfortunately most people do not, let alone to get a second opinion when diagnosed. Thank you tho for explaining useful information I just wish more data links could be cited or left in comments.
After watching all parts of Dr. Honda and obviously before that all docs abt Demi not as Demi's fan but as an addict (sober 2 yrs) I wonder what Demi would think about what Dr. Honda is saying... would she be asking wtf my therapist came from or who the hell is this guy telling me how to do theraphy.
Shortly after this documentary came out, Demi came forward and said she doesn’t believe moderation and her “California sober” lifestyle were the correct approach and that full sobriety is the only way to achieve recovery. So thankfully she did learn this lesson without turning back to hard drugs.
Idk maybe I‘m thinking to much into it, but in the Dancing With The Devil music video when she left the Hospital bed she’s wearing the same clothes she wore at the night of her OD. And this made me feel weird
Hello, I'm a Demi fan and I've found your videos an perspective on her very interesting thus far. I was wondering if you might consider doing the same thing for her previous documentary, Simply Complicated that came out in 2017 on TH-cam. I know it's a bit old but it might give you context for some of her actions in this documentary!
Im glad you mentioned amy winehouse. and I dont know if you did but if you did not it would be nice to see a video about her actually. because her story saddens me so much and most of the things are obvious in her lyrics. but it would be nice to hear more from a professional
So Demi released a song called sober like a month or so before her ODed when she brought that I was like is this new is this recent? Is this from years ago? & I was so worried & when I heard she ODed I wasn't shocked bc she brought out that song the month before & admitted but I was like was no one telling her it's bad did they know? If my friend did that I'd ask if they are okay & if they need anything
I Don’t know every song, I don’t know every story, I know she’s human when she’s correct she deserves to be listens to and when she’s wrong and needs correction she deserves to have a witness who will do that, I hope for her healing recovery, peace patience and kindness.
The part where you mentioned the basis for your fear and worrying is that you've seen tons of cases like this is something that stuck with me. I think part of the reason her family for the most part, and maybe even her friends too, are so "naïve", not sure about that being the right word, is that I guess if you don't see this story thousands of times play out with different people, like you would if you work as a clinician for these types of cases, you wouldn't recognize the patterns in it. I guess in a way that's just because she comes from a "normal" family, with a few pieces that do match up with those stories but overall it doesn't seem to be the case, and also maybe because of the isolation that the celebrity factor brings in. I just hope they notice the mistakes they've made so far and correct course
Her whole story just makes me bawl my eyes out because I hate to say it but I can see it happening again, no one really seems to be on her true side. Im terrified. Coming from losing a very close friend to Fent earlier this year I saw her exact same cycle as Demi's. ooooof... someone step in please.
Dr Kirk please listen to her album Dancing with the Devil... The Art of Starting Over. Because of your musical and lyrical talent combined with this documentary analysis it would be very interesting to see you react to her music.
Weed is commonly used in Addiction recovery. But no one should smoke weed until they are at least a few years sober. Not super early into recovery. Alcohol it depends. Some people who had an alcohol problem can control it but it’s rare. But addicts mainly drink alcohol if it wasn’t their drug of choice
So true about the lyrics relating to the singer and where they are at.. I worry for The Weeknd (abel) especially with his latest album. It sounds like he wants to recover but has lost hope in himself to do so. Ahhh I wish u could react to his album/lyrics!! Faith lyrics: I've been sober for a year, now it's time for me To go back to my old ways, don't you cry for me Thought I'd be a better man, but I lied to me and to you
demi took a small break and definitely put on their strong fake it till you make it face to keep their career moving before they were fully ready but the pandemic definitely helped them slow down. I really do feel like it delayed a relapse. I really hope demi is right but fully expect the worst and hope for the best. Thank you for your breakdown on the doc. It helped me a lot!
I had anorexia (let me correct myself: I survived anorexia) and heavy substance abuse and oh my god this girl scares me. I look at her and I see who I was in that state. I think she is using stuff every day. I have exactly the same worry and question in my mind: how long is she going to make it? I feel shame when I look at her just because of my past which is apparetly her present life. She has all the money to get any kind of drug she wants. I am worried too.
@@PsychologyInSeattle Thank you! Parts of her story remind me a lot of Chris Farley or Amy Winehouse. Both of them had stories where you realize the seeds of addiction were so deeply rooted, there was no one singular moment to save them. Their fates were never sealed, but it's not as simple as saying "if THIS never happened then they would still be here." When you get the full story, you realize it is a culmination of events and missed opportunities that makes addiction and those who perish from it, feel so helpless
keep coming back, theyd say at AA if she started with the, "I know my limits, controlled drinking, I'll never be on the cover of a magazine for an overdose again".... its ONE DAY AT A TIME
Honestly her mother’s words are very concerning. Especially being a victim of domestic abuse, and her own trials and errors with her addiction issues. I hope to God Demi lives to see 30.
Addiction is a life-long battle and she's skating on really thin ice with the way she's approaching recovery here. The fact that her mom is so confident in her sobriety is really troubling. And with her former assistant saying "she knows her limits"... that could not be farther from the truth. Her team is not helping her!
that wasn't her friend, it wâs her former assistant, the one who found her passed out, naked in the bed the one who called 911, the one who watched her turn fully blue, the one who said, she has never seen anything so scary... the one, without there wouldn't be a Demi anymore, that same person, yes.
@@cassie1560 Yes, you're right. I changed my comment to reflect that.
Are you a psychologist? Do you really know her team and what help she's getting? If not you're speaking out of your ass
@@selinapoochie She knows as much as Demi has exposed, and what she exposed (that she didn’t have to) is enough to detail that she is skating thin and there are many standing by... watching. She’s a walking disaster.
@@southernsoul152 Yes, exactly. I'm not a psychologist (nor did I claim to be); all I did was agree with the Dr.'s comments on what he saw in the video and talked about them according to my interpretation and experience.
In Mac Miller’s last music video he wrote Memento Mori (meaning “remember that you must die”) inside the casket he was laying in. The song was about him thinking he would stay sober. He then overdosed on heroin. “Dancing with the Devil” is Demi’s memento mori
Omg 😭
That’s heartbreaking. I hope this is not the case
I don’t mean to be rude but I genuinely don’t think Demi is gonna stay sober for real this time. 😔
I don’t want to edit my comment cause it’ll take away “psychology in Seattle’s” heart, but for anyone interested the song I am referring to is called “Self Care” by Mac Miller
The heroin’s a cap - he died of a toxic mixture of alcohol, cocaine, and fentanyl.
When I was watching I thought the earlier episodes with her recounting her OD were going to be the hardest parts to watch but it was actually the later episodes that had me cringing and in fear the most. I just get a really bad feeling hearing Demi, her family, friends, and team talk about everything.
I feel exactly the same.. Seems to me that she is actually longing for the drugs and that she is not over them. Hope she wont relapse.
pls the "hey deserving listeners" made my day
Same
Many years ago, a listener suggested that title: "Deserving Listeners" because I would always close with "you deserve it." Love it!
@@PsychologyInSeattle im glad you have kept it ever since !
@@PsychologyInSeattle That's awesome I'm glad you have kept it as well :)
The problem is there's lots of people making her look good and healthy while living of her narrative profits. Unfortunally I can't believe this people will look after her when they can loose millions of dollars.
that's such a sad fact actually
Thank you for bringing up the Amy Winehouse comparison. I remember when the song Rehab came out I kept yelling at the radio, "Go to rehab! If people love you enough to say you need to go, you need to go." After her death, I just change the station when the song comes on. Can't listen knowing how it all turned out. Wish that song could come on and I could say, "So glad you finally went to rehab and were able to get healthy." It's why I haven't listened to "Dancing with the Devil" brings me back in the same way.
Agreed.
it still horrifies me to see people dance at the concert while she sings rehab
Her mom is in denial. She seems to have contributed extensively to her issues.
as her mom said Demi was present when she saw the abuse her father did to her mom, she saw her mom struggling with eating disorder and self-medicating with drugs, so this was normal for her and unfortunately she found comfort on what her dad chose over her family: alcohol
Yes is like she never help her deal with sadness or negative feelings. Being able to be sad is a skill you have to teach your children. Sometimes when I cry I feel weak but after watching this I am happy I am able to be sad and miserable and then as all humans slowly rebuild and be happy again
Her mum gives me the worst vibes!
I think that her mom has an huge depression...
I mean. We know what the dad contributed to this situation... but what about the mom?
I can’t help but wonder how that must be for Demi to caretake all the people around her who want so badly to believe she has everything under control. They all seem like they really want and need to believe that, and they need Demi to reassure them this time will be different. Maybe often. That’s a lot of pressure in itself; and subtle, constant stress that she may not even be aware of. Maybe it would be a relief for her to have someone be honest and say: I don’t buy that you have it under control and it’s also okay that you don’t.
You hit the nail on the head... described this perfectly.
Your comment made me cry. I feel this way in my life right now. I thank God my best friend told me this recently. She's seen me through it all....some people don't even have 1 person so I'm grateful I have her but it still is just a lot to receive the pressure from nearly all other ends of the earth.
this is incredibly insightful
Demi's mom's responce gave me goosebumps 😬 if this happened in my life to my child, worry will be a constant state of mind 😬😬😬
Maybe she's in denial as a way to cope with the stress and anxiety... I feel bad for Demi and for everyone around her who loves her and wants her safe and healthy.
Not a single tear was shed in her face while her friends cried when they spoke of the incident..
@@Dash120z just because she didn’t cry doesn’t mean it hurt less
@@Dash120z you have to remember that this isn't demi's first relapse or things that are related to addiction. as someone who has dealt with a family member who is an addict, everyday you can see them on drugs or how they act & over time you're able to handle it without breaking down and crying, instead you deal with it while it's happening and you cry later. i hope that makes sense because it's something i can't really put into words.
Another perfect documentary of what addicts say when they are setting themselves up for yet another relapse. She works hard everyday to be able to meet her alcohol count ( only 2 drinks tonight..only 2 drinks tonight...tiny little bit of THC) so that she can believe she is normal and "balanced". I hope she is one of the rare occasions.
The alcohol is going to be the issue or the catalyst for more drugs. She says in the documentary she was drinking wine and 30 minutes later she's calling for drugs. Also she has already struggled with alcoholism. As Elton said, this moderation therapy doesn't work
I’m an alcoholic in recovery and my “best friend” would say the same things to me. She would say “you’re not an alcoholic because you don’t drink every day” which was technically true. I would take a 24 hour break. And then drink for 7 days straight. I wouldn’t go to work drunk. Until I did.
Everyone was saying that my uncle (32yo) was better because he wasn't as bad as before. In a way since nobody saw him getting worse they didn't feel he needed urgent help. He just overdosed last night and my grandma is the one that found him. He didn't make it.
I’m so sorry for your loss ❤️
I’m sorry for your loss❤️
I'm so sorry, sending hugs
So sorry, 💔
I'm so sorry
Thank you for reacting to this documentary. It gives a perspective that was lacking in the original. ❤️
Dr. Honda I cannot say this enough: thank you for your channel! 😊
I'm worried for her too. My sister-in-law swore up and down that she was okay until she drank so much that she fell off the stairs and into a coma that she never woke up from.
I distance myself from addicts as well because the potential to lose someone else due to drugs and alcohol is too much to deal with.
I'm so sorry, Lavinder. So tragic.
I'm sorry but I'm getting a pretty bad feeling from her mom.
I keep seeing comments like this, can you elaborate a little? Like, are you concerned that she’s in denial, or...?
@@eileensnow6153 hm its kind of hard to pin it down but just her perspective (the little part we've seen at least) seems to come from a self centered/naive place. The way she talks reminds me of my own mother, not emotionally invested or mature in a "motherly way". It seems like she just goes with whatever demi says and doesn't question it although she obviously should. Also the fact that she put her daughter in the spotlight from a very young age doesn't really sit right with me. Dont know their relationship but i wouldn't be surprised if it was difficult. But of course thats just my perspective and i could be completely wrong.:)
@Elizabeth very well put!
„I saw those bloody rags that morning. Despite the alarms that went off in my head, we pushed the incident aside. There wasn‘t time for talking. As demi raced to the studio out one door, I left through another to take Madison, my youngest, to the set of desperate housewifes.“ - Demi‘s mom
@@jackieb4505 what is this from?
Demi's mom seems like she's in denial and an enabler. I hope that nothing bad happens, but I'm genuinely worried.
That point about stories being written into lyrics reminds me so much of “Heavy” and Chester Bennington. I didn’t know about the album until I saw the news about his passing on Twitter (of all places), and I listened to the whole thing that night. You could tell he was suffering, especially after Chris Cornell’s own suicide, through the lyrics of that entire album.
Further, if Demi would’ve died that day, her last songs would’ve been Sober (and Anyone, if it were to be released posthumously). Cries for help, clear as day. I truly hope that this album isn’t leading up to the same sort of fate.
Anyone came out in 2020 and was her first song released post rehab. So her last song before her od (July 2018) would have been sober.
@@Amalia.s.8059 True, but it was recorded before her od (4 days before). I think it would’ve been released posthumously if she were to die that day.
lmaooo dr kirk’s reaction when the chick said “she knows her limits” 😂😂
Her friends saying, "She knows her limits..." Yeah, I'm not so sure about that.
I feel like her former assistant, Jordan, was definitely circumventing her true feelings. Right after she said Demi "knows her limits", she then says "and I know her." Which I think most people took as her meaning I know her and trust her. But there was something about the way Jordan said that, and then shealmost smiling and chuckling to herself that leads me to believe she doesn't have a lot of faith. That "and I know her" felt more like a "and I know her, and what she's capable of because I've seen it first hand" but I could be completely off base. Oh man, at the end of the day- fuck addiction. It's just su
This is the tragic thing with these celebrities: their team often doesn’t care about the human but only see them as a money maker. Countless young stars have died because they have been pushed way beyond their limits. This should be a question of human rights😔🙏🏼
Her previous team had her a psychiatrist, life coach, sober coach, sober companions, therapists, nutritionists, personal trainers, etc. and Demi went on national television blasting them cause “tHey KePt tElliNg Me wHat To dO”
That means Demi herself isn’t ready to be healthy. Period. Her teams cannot be blamed “only see her as a money maker”. NO. She has all the access and help in the world helped and provided by BY HER TEAM and Demi just DOESNT WANT IT. Stop treating her like a helpless money maker machine. She’s a 30 year old adult. Give her the responsibility.
@@bleudiamondbleu Well, yes, I agree a little in her case. She is not ready but the team also has a responsibility.
@@bleudiamondbleu although I agree with what you said about her taking responsibility if you look more into the specific things her old team did, it rlly was fucked up. i mean if ppl did the stuff to me that they did to her, id be miserable too. like idk about you, but I don't think a sober coach should be telling you you're selfish for hitting an all time low and wanting help.
@@bleudiamondbleu her old team made the assistant feel guilty for attempting to call 911... had she not called Demi would have died. Don't praise that crap team. She needs those people again but better. Like Dr. Honda said, there's a lot of therapist/coaches that think they know what they're doing but they don't. Addicts have to want help, they cannot be forced into getting it.
@@thisismecindy you are technically wrong. The assistant never said her TEAM would make her feel bad for calling 911. She said generally “I didn’t wanna get in trouble”. For all we know that could mean in trouble from Demi herself. We all know how she reacted the last time she was snitched on for using (punched a backup dancer). There’s no telling with an addict and the assistant ever specified who she’d be in trouble with. That’s all :) x
"I'm worried" me too Dr. Kirk....me too.
She actually had a team before this one that was on top of her recovery throughout her entire career. They didn't approve of her drinking which is why she fired them (or they dropped her) before her overdose. They seemed to have forced her into recovery which isn't a great approach but they definitely cared about her and had her best interest with a lot of professional recovery people around her. Eventually, I think they just had to walk away and distance themselves from someone who they cared so much about. I highly recommend watching her older documentary to compare! These videos are really insightful and I appreciate learning from you!
That’s not why she dropped them. She was struggling with her eating disorder at the time and she asked them for help and they told her she wasn’t sick enough. She struggled for 6 months and they abandoned her when she was struggling with it. She was very miserable so she relapsed. They were very controlling of her and what she ate. It was really bad
They controlled her food, she couldn't have a cake on her birthday, they just wanted her skinny. They didn't care about her
@@lucasfelipe024 a management team doesn't have the power to control her like this though...like legally they don't. What they CAN possibly have control over is career-related things due to contracts and such so I don't understand this narrative she's spinning about some of these claims.
@@mikemoffett6499 Controlling what she ate is not okay but as even she has said recently, they had her best interest. That being said, they legally cannot control her food and such and they can't control her wanting to go get help for her struggles. They are a management team....for her career. If you watched her old documentary, you know that they were ready to walk away from her at the time. The only difference is that this time, they did. And in my opinion, they had every right to distance themselves.
@@nicole-ls2zb she asked them for help and they told her she wasn’t sick enough. Which is messed up
"If you are a big fan of Demi, which I am guessing you are if you are watching this..." haha I barely know her, I am a big fan of this channel, and would watch anything that Kirk makes a commentary video of :D
She wrote a song called ‘sober’ right before the night of the OD and it’s about how she’s sorry she’s not sober anymore. Now she wrote ‘dancing with the devil’ and I’m scared
But she also wrote good place
The song dancing with the devil is about her drinking and doing drugs before her OD. It’s about her past. Not the journey she’s on now. If you wanna hear that then listen to California sober on her new album. Or the whole album as it is the journey she’s been on since she ODed until now.
Demi's mom is in complete denial, she believes that nothing that Demi could now could put her back to the ICU but what if it sends her straight to her grave then ??
Yup. Plus alcohol overdose and withdrawal can kill someone
She said right now. Right now she feels that way about Demi. She doesn’t mean Demi is cured she knows it’s one day at a time.
I’m curious to know what your take is on her whole FroYo controversy. While I understand and empathize with her overall message, to be it just signaled more that she is not used to hearing the word “no” or to receiving push back, and it makes me worry about what it means for her recovery.
As someone who has addicts in their family, the most concerning part was her not taking responsibility for her actions. One of the things you learn with addicts is that not taking responsibility is a big indicator they are about to relapse or have. I hope her family and team take it as a huge red flag and do what they can to ensure her appropriate care team is notified of possible issues. You can't make an addict do anything but part of not enabling them is pointing out when their behavior is troubling.
@@pigpjs yes, her family and team would benefit from going to Al-Anon or CoDa meetings. I feel they are still in the stage where they are afraid of telling her no or drawing boundaries because they’re afraid it might anger her which may trigger her to use and they don’t realize this just enables the addicts behavior (whether they are using or not a person can still act as they were when they were using).
I can’t make my friends stop drinking alcohol around me. In my world, I would have to get a new set of friends. For her, people will change for her. In fact, people’s livelihoods revolve around her. It’s a pretty interesting contrast between worlds.
Great video Dr. Honda, I agree with you, there's nothing we can do unfortunately 😕 just hope that she will recover and that's it
I commented in your video before, but I was really thrown by her froyo fiasco, and im really struggling to see her pov. I was hoping you could react to her apology, i think it would help us empathize a little with her
She didn’t give an apology.
@@makddl I think your statement is kinda dismissive. If someone feels a certain way towards something, it shouldn't be invalidated. The OP is looking for Dr. Kirks clarification, not yours. I don't think there's an issue with that.
@@makddl i don’t think it’s the talking about triggers so much as destroying a small business over them. These things can be handled privately, she seemed to react really weirdly. Especially since the options that triggered her were there for more than just ‘dieting’ reasons. People with diabetes and celiac etc often go for sugar free options. Blasting this little mom and pop froyo on a public platform in front of millions for carrying these products seemed really irrational when she could just as easily have gotten the point across through contacting the store privately to complain and talking more broadly about how terminology like ‘ guilt free’ should go away. It’s different from the average joe leaving the average Yelp review, when you’re a celebrity and you blast a place on your Twitter, you might be putting it in the red.
@@makddl froyo is seen as a “low cal” treat and a trigger for some people (including Demi, she said it in her “apology”). So she went to go get a trigger food, got triggered by something else in the store, then blamed being triggered on the small business instead of herself. Also, the world is full of triggers, and it’s on the individual (instead of society like Demi thinks) to take care of themselves. I say this as someone who suffered from self harm and disordered eating and has plenty of their own triggers to worry about.
@@makddl In therapy, something I learned is that I am not able to control my triggers, but I am able to control how I react/respond to them. In fact, the only thing I can control in my life is my decisions and how I react/respond to things. That is it! Her going off on the yogurt shop, to me, seemed like her trying to control things she can't, and trying to deflect from taking charge of her response/reactions.
I'm not a therapist but I agree with everything he says, I learn so much by watching this. I really hope she doesn't die. It looks like it might happen so as he said we have to prepare
Same
As someone who had 4 siblings 3 of whom are addicts, and one who overdosed and died I really think this is leading to another tragedy and its definitely upsetting and worrying.
Duuuuuuuude took the thoughts right out of my brain... I'm worried for her. I don't have a good feeling
Not sure if this has been mentioned since i did miss a few episodes but does anyone think it's awful that her security team let her drug dealer on the property at all...I guess at the end of the day she pays them so she could just fire them if they got in the way of her drugs :/
I wondered about this, too!
Maybe they didn’t know he was her dealer? Cause all Demi has to say is “this is my friend” and there’s nth they could do about it
They most likely didn't know.
It’s very unclear but I’m guessing they either didn’t know or they don’t stay onsite at the property 24/7 idk
It sounds like they weren’t on site 24/7. She called him at 5 in the morning, and it sounds like her assistant and chef were the first ones there in the morning and found her OD’ing. Her assistant called head of security… so yeah, not sure.
I understand the weed thing, but alcohol is a slippery effing slope. That substance does NO good to anyone. She really, REALLY needs to be living a normal life without the pressures of celebricy. I hope she finds her path.
This is exactly what I said! I know weed has helped a lot of addicts get off of hard drugs so I’m not too worried about that. But I’ve never heard of an addict successfully drinking in moderation without moving onto harder things. Alcohol already impairs your judgment as it is, it’s just all around a really really bad idea. I’m so worried for her and I hope she knows what she’s doing
@@gnicole13 exactly. Alcohol use is a social phenomenon. It is unnecessary. Weed on the other hand can have outstandingly positive affects, for both addicts and non addicts alike. It's a good leeway between complete sobriety and full blown addiction. But alcohol... no, its dumb, its harmful, addicts should stay away from it
That said I do know addicts who use in moderation now while staying away from the harder stuff. But given demis history, I dont think she is this type of person, and if she is it is WAY too premature. She is not done her healing.
Im not an addict and never used hard drugs but even I am scared to drink sometimes because there is a thin line and alcohol itself blurs that line
It's poignant to remember that Amy W. was in rehab and seemingly doing well when she died. Demi L. seems to be in even worse shape having had multiple strokes and a heart attack already. Opiate addiction is no joke. Those medications that block the receptors or work like Methadone have serious side effects and alcohol use is known to have potentially deadly interactions like causing heart attacks. It's really scary to hear her say it's OK for her to drink.
Yes! So many parallels here. Most people don't know she hadn't touched drugs for a good 6 months before she died. Like Demi, she had people around here who didn't have her best interest at heart.
All I know is that she’s been doing moderation for 2 years since 2019 and she said it’s different so I don’t know if it’s actually different or not
Ya it's a bit unconventional but I think we all want it to work for her! Only thing I would say is I hope her team/family realizes that she is an addict and chosing either moderation or abstinence will be an every day struggle. I hope they are realistic with her so that the addiction doesn't sabotage her out of nowhere. It seems like she was attempting to do the moderation technique for a while before she overdosed. But ofc we want to pray and believe this time it's really different and she can do this!
@@cty1037 before she overdosed the first day she started drinking was the same day she picked up a lot of drugs. So she wasn’t really doing moderation but that was what she was telling her friends about. Also abstinence and moderation are both very difficult and hard paths. People relapse at any path in recovery so really there’s not a much more risky. All paths are risky but valid
The approach she's taking is what saved my life after years and years of the relapse/recovery cycle. I've been "California sober" for 13 years (I've had shockingly similar experiences to hers), and have a beautiful life now. I'm so grateful I gave up the black and white, all or nothing mindset.
@@ser2952 do you use alcohol? Because alcohol is risky
@@mikemoffett6499 I can't remember the last time, but yes, I've had alcohol in the last 13 years. I don't really have any desire to drink, so it's the occasional glass of wine here or there over the years.
Thank you so much for this series. I've been a Demi fan since i was just a teen and she really was the first public person i hear talk about depression and self harm, and truly made me feel less alone. But watching this documentary left me with a bitter taste and i wasn't sure why, now I understand. So thank you for telling the truth even though it might be hard, and for preparing us for the possiblity of a relapse, it;s kind of silly but I felt kinda guilty distancing myself for her. Idk.
These videos on Demi have helped me see how much more help I really need and that I am deserving of it, and have been motivating to go out and get it so I want to send my sincerest gratitude.
I truly, deeply appreciate your work on rising awareness of mental health by creating this channel. Thank you so much!
thanks for covering! this has been so enlightening.
My pleasure!
It's definitely haunting to watch this reaction a full year later, knowing that Demi has returned to rehab in 2022 and they have now admitted that "sober sober" is the only way to be for them. Thankfully they have now seemed to realize this and gotten further treatment. Of course we don't know intimate personal details about said treatment but they have now committed to complete abstinence and I am so hopeful that they stick with it. One thing that I do think Demi did really right is that they shared their story, no matter how flawed the thinking about the whole "california sober" thing is, because it puts a face to these issues such as addiction, eating disorders, sexual assault, etc and humanizes it in a way and gets people to talk about it because, though it's not fair and obviously causes them a lot of pressure, being a public figure does make you some kind of "role model" whether you want it to or not. I am definitely glad that they at least said that "just because this is what I am doing that doesn't mean it will work for you" as well as including Elton John's 30 year strong sobriety perspective even though it did not align with their views at this point in their recovery journey.
On a personal level, a lot of my own story is very similar to Demi's in regards to traumatic upbringing with continuing traumas later in life, sexual abuse, self esteem and body dysmorphia issues, self harm, and substance abuse issues. When the "Dancing with the Devil" album and documentary came out I was in the throws of active addiction and being a fan of Demi since their Disney days (I am only 5 years younger than them so I definitely grew up alongside them in a way) I without question wanted to give this docuseries and the album a view and listen. Just hearing just how bad their overdose was, how it effected those around them and their life, how critical and dangerous the health ramifications were, and how open and honest they were about their struggles - it encouraged me to get help, because I was able to empathize with them, someone I have deeply supported, respected and cared about for many years now, in a way I was not able to do so with myself; The problematic "california sober" views not even mattering in my case, because I was able to find a program with people that have really schooled me in the way that addiction works to know better than to use "soft" drugs. I can only pray to whatever powers that be that others are able to do the same for themselves and not take the "california sobriety" thing as a hard and fast rule at the risk of their lives, but when it comes down to it, it is very true that everyone's journey is their own, but I will be forever grateful for Demi's hand in helping me begin mine and I will always be rooting for them.
I feel like after her od I’ve distanced myself and mentally prepared for the worst, especially after this documentary. Demi and I are the same age and I have watched her since I was 14 and have grown up with her music, the same with Miley, so even though I’m just a fan it’s hard to watch all this happen. It’s like watching a friend dig their own grave.
When Cory Monteith overdosed I was not prepared at all and that hit me harder than I imagined! It’s so crazy how much celebrities affect us, what a strange thing
i think you should react to her song “dancing with the devil”
I love your work. I am a Spanish psychology student and your videos give me lifee
you can't do the same things over and over again and expect different results. How are people around her so blind that they can't see it? Her addicted self made sure to sorround her with enablers this time, and it's very dangerous.
I’m so very thankful I got my CPR /AED training and know how to help and assist in scary situations.
I definitely recommend watching her dancing with the devil music video. It’s a song and video portraying the night of her OD
Of course Dr. Honda loves Elliott Smith!! Love them both.
To say anyone in the recovery process "knows their limits" is pure insanity.. Having a bunch of yes men.. And women is dangerous
This was so illuminating. Thank you so much for the patience and empathy and insight you offered throughout these seven videos 🙏🏾
What do you consider early recovery? what we are seeing is a 2 year filming, her overdose was 3 tears ago in total in 2018. 3 years isnt the longest time but i feel from your speech youre referring to a maybe a year?
I'm not a psychologist, but when I hear him say "early recovery," I assume he's talking about a mindset more than a timeframe. Demi presents as someone who is still very raw, is still still healing and at the moment doesn't seem very good at regulating / managing her emotions in a healthy way. She uses marijuana and alcohol to soothe her emotions, but still lashes out in public. I've listened to a few celebrity addicts in late stage recovery talk about their addiction and they sound very different. That being said...those addicts I've listened to, with the exception of relapses, have been completely sober for 10+ years. Also, Demi relapsed after her big overdose. So it's probably been less than three years of her California sobriety.
Bless elliott smith. One of my very favorites ❤
I watched this documentary because I saw you had a series reacting to it... guess I’m not a fan of Demi. But a fan of you.
This is terrifying. Truly terrifying. I was friends with someone who battled exactly these demons. She also OD’d on heroin. She was technically dead for several minutes and they brought her back. Her OD resulted in permanent brain damage. She conquered the eating disorder..mostly. But the substance struggles and the depression that resulted from the OD never dissipated. She tried to kill herself so many times I lost count. She did exactly what Demi’s sister talks about here - came back from the brink time and time again. Until she didn’t. After her father died in 2010, she spiraled into depression. She had ECT. She had ketamine infusions. She went inpatient for a year and a half. Six months after she left the hospital in 2015, she bought drugs - presumably heroin - and committed suicide. I think about what she’d say if she were listening to demi (she was brilliant and studying to be a psychiatrist, ironically enough) - she’d say Demi is delusional. She’d say she’s playing with fire. She’d say everyone around her is enabling her. And I know that life - while my friend was inpatient, my husband was struggling with addiction and suicidal ideation. I told myself we were out of the woods time and time and time again. I lost my best friend at the same time that I was afraid I was going to lose my husband to the same demons. It was another three years before he hit a point of stability that was actually real. We’d been together by that time for fourteen years. He’d struggled with substance abuse issues the entirety of our relationship. He can’t even listen to things about Demi right now - not because it triggers him but because he knows she’s lying to herself. As someone who ends up being the sober rock to people with addictive personalities (not a substance person myself - depression, anxiety, ED-NOS/anorexia, ADHD, and formerly borderline personality that were all misdiagnosed as bipolar disorder early on), it’s fucking brutal to hear the things she’s saying and that the people around her are saying. I’ve been down that road so many times. They’re nowhere near being out of the woods. The similarities between her and my friend are gut wrenching. If anyone was smart enough and tough enough to beat all of this, it was my best friend. And she still succumbed to it in the end. I’m very worried for her. I’m worried for her family. You can’t believe an addict at this juncture - it’s not logical or possible to believe them. They have to earn that trust back again. I’m only JUST at the point of being able to trust what my husband tells me again. And even then it comes with a massive grain of salt because addiction will always been a dynamic we deal with. I know how powerful the need to believe them is. I know it too well. But god..this is frightening.
She’s human and she needs support. Ima be a fan until the rails fall off
I wonder if she's not talking about NA, AA, or OA because I believe they ask you not broadcast you're in the program. Not out of shame but for the anonymous part.
Maybe, but if she’s publicly admitting to drinking and smoking pot I doubt those groups would continue to support her. Not in a judgmental way but because it goes against their whole message and process.
The anonymous part of AA/NA doesn't refer to you unless you want it to. It applies to not outing other people and not sharing anyone's business about what they share in meetings.
This channel is so addicting
Ha!
you seem like a really good therapist
Her friends and parents themselves need therapy or Alanon. They are just as wrapped up in her addiction and cycles as she is. Denial is a very easy way to cope inwardly and outwardly and also the stakes are different for the "non-celebrity" addict families. Stakes are similar but different as well. These people depend on her as much as she depends on drugs. I heard a bunch of deflection and blaming. Hence why the 12 steps are wrote and done in a particular way. Amends are not done for quite some time. Abstinence from all mind and mood altering substances to clear way to complete the 12 steps... this documetary will outlive Demi if she continues her path sadly....
Does anyone else notice that Demi is high during this documentary? I mean, allegedly high. I have addicts in my family. I’m painfully aware of what it looks like.
Is she on Naltrexone?
Naltrexone can be overridden, but the amount you need to feel high is enough to kill someone. It happened to my friend. As an alcoholic, I drank on it because it wasn’t necessarily about the feeling I got, it was the process I was hooked on I think.
Sorry if this has been addressed all rest. This is the first I have learned of her and first time watching this
Please don't forget about Plathville 🤗
I’m a big fan of Demi and have been since her Disney channel days and I just pray for the best for her 💖 I don’t think this California sober moderation thing is a good idea and I am very worried for her. I can’t believe her mom isn’t worried at all! I feel like all parents worry about their kids even if they don’t struggle with addictions. Especially Demi because like the doc said she is really good at hiding her struggles.
It would be great if you commented on the froyo situation Dr Honda! It even shocked me as a big fan of her.
I hope he doesn’t comment on the froyo she was very triggered, her words, got twisted, fake screen shots made to make her look worse, hella TH-cam videos, thousands of horrible vile comment....... people acting like she murdered the shops family. Let’s move on she’s human
@@alyssahomen3753 that’s true! I was kind of curious about her mental state which is why I wanted Dr Honda’s take but I agree! She was super triggered and I hope she is working on her triggers and we can all move on 💕
I am currently doing Buddhist 12 steps (I don’t believe in God) and coda meetings and therapy. I wish I had the means to afford half the specialists you recommended during this series but unfortunately most people do not, let alone to get a second opinion when diagnosed. Thank you tho for explaining useful information I just wish more data links could be cited or left in comments.
After watching all parts of Dr. Honda and obviously before that all docs abt Demi not as Demi's fan but as an addict (sober 2 yrs) I wonder what Demi would think about what Dr. Honda is saying... would she be asking wtf my therapist came from or who the hell is this guy telling me how to do theraphy.
Shortly after this documentary came out, Demi came forward and said she doesn’t believe moderation and her “California sober” lifestyle were the correct approach and that full sobriety is the only way to achieve recovery. So thankfully she did learn this lesson without turning back to hard drugs.
Idk maybe I‘m thinking to much into it, but in the Dancing With The Devil music video when she left the Hospital bed she’s wearing the same clothes she wore at the night of her OD. And this made me feel weird
Demi's mom seems very neglectful.
Yeah, even the stepdad is more concerned than the mom
I also love Elliot Smith and Amy Winehouse!
edit : autocorrect
this was beautifully made
Hello, I'm a Demi fan and I've found your videos an perspective on her very interesting thus far. I was wondering if you might consider doing the same thing for her previous documentary, Simply Complicated that came out in 2017 on TH-cam. I know it's a bit old but it might give you context for some of her actions in this documentary!
Im glad you mentioned amy winehouse. and I dont know if you did but if you did not it would be nice to see a video about her actually. because her story saddens me so much and most of the things are obvious in her lyrics. but it would be nice to hear more from a professional
So Demi released a song called sober like a month or so before her ODed when she brought that I was like is this new is this recent? Is this from years ago? & I was so worried & when I heard she ODed I wasn't shocked bc she brought out that song the month before & admitted but I was like was no one telling her it's bad did they know? If my friend did that I'd ask if they are okay & if they need anything
I Don’t know every song, I don’t know every story, I know she’s human when she’s correct she deserves to be listens to and when she’s wrong and needs correction she deserves to have a witness who will do that, I hope for her healing recovery, peace patience and kindness.
The part where you mentioned the basis for your fear and worrying is that you've seen tons of cases like this is something that stuck with me. I think part of the reason her family for the most part, and maybe even her friends too, are so "naïve", not sure about that being the right word, is that I guess if you don't see this story thousands of times play out with different people, like you would if you work as a clinician for these types of cases, you wouldn't recognize the patterns in it. I guess in a way that's just because she comes from a "normal" family, with a few pieces that do match up with those stories but overall it doesn't seem to be the case, and also maybe because of the isolation that the celebrity factor brings in. I just hope they notice the mistakes they've made so far and correct course
Dr. Honda I think you would really enjoy reacting to The World’s a Little Blurry, the Billie Eilish documentary
Her whole story just makes me bawl my eyes out because I hate to say it but I can see it happening again, no one really seems to be on her true side. Im terrified. Coming from losing a very close friend to Fent earlier this year I saw her exact same cycle as Demi's. ooooof... someone step in please.
I feel like she really has a pall over her. It’s scary.
Dr Kirk please listen to her album Dancing with the Devil... The Art of Starting Over. Because of your musical and lyrical talent combined with this documentary analysis it would be very interesting to see you react to her music.
Weed is commonly used in Addiction recovery. But no one should smoke weed until they are at least a few years sober. Not super early into recovery. Alcohol it depends. Some people who had an alcohol problem can control it but it’s rare. But addicts mainly drink alcohol if it wasn’t their drug of choice
"I'm guessing you are [a big fan] if you're watching this"
Actually, I've never heard any song of her ;-)
@MelomankaPL Yeah, she wasn't really popular in Poland.
What a great channel
Well, this time she's not lying to the people around her and being candid about seeking moderation. That's no small difference.
So true about the lyrics relating to the singer and where they are at..
I worry for The Weeknd (abel) especially with his latest album. It sounds like he wants to recover but has lost hope in himself to do so.
Ahhh I wish u could react to his album/lyrics!!
Faith lyrics:
I've been sober for a year, now it's time for me
To go back to my old ways, don't you cry for me
Thought I'd be a better man, but I lied to me and to you
Actually, I am watching this because I'm a big fan of you :)
Thank you for your great content!
Sucks that people call alcohol a soft drug
Agreed. Highly destructive.
Demi “she knows her limits” lavato.......you gotta be kidding me
demi took a small break and definitely put on their strong fake it till you make it face to keep their career moving before they were fully ready but the pandemic definitely helped them slow down. I really do feel like it delayed a relapse. I really hope demi is right but fully expect the worst and hope for the best. Thank you for your breakdown on the doc. It helped me a lot!
I had anorexia (let me correct myself: I survived anorexia) and heavy substance abuse and oh my god this girl scares me. I look at her and I see who I was in that state. I think she is using stuff every day. I have exactly the same worry and question in my mind: how long is she going to make it? I feel shame when I look at her just because of my past which is apparetly her present life. She has all the money to get any kind of drug she wants. I am worried too.
I don't have a good feeling about any of this. I hope she makes it and finds total sobriety. But my gut tells me something is really wrong.
Agreed. I like your compassion.
@@PsychologyInSeattle Thank you! Parts of her story remind me a lot of Chris Farley or Amy Winehouse. Both of them had stories where you realize the seeds of addiction were so deeply rooted, there was no one singular moment to save them. Their fates were never sealed, but it's not as simple as saying "if THIS never happened then they would still be here." When you get the full story, you realize it is a culmination of events and missed opportunities that makes addiction and those who perish from it, feel so helpless
Thank you for sharing your experiences. I’m sure it’s very difficult sometimes, but it is helpful. (The client outside your window)
I too love Elliot Smith Dr !
Is this the last one in the reactions? I know you said, you’d keep watching is there a reason you stopped
keep coming back, theyd say at AA if she started with the, "I know my limits, controlled drinking, I'll never be on the cover of a magazine for an overdose again".... its ONE DAY AT A TIME
Will there be an 8th episode?
‘She knows her limits..’
Uhhh.. very clearly not. This is all really.. wrong..(?) what
The fact that he’s an Elliott Smith fan makes me love him even more!😭.
Oh man... It kind of sounds like she has a lot of enablers around her :(
Honestly her mother’s words are very concerning. Especially being a victim of domestic abuse, and her own trials and errors with her addiction issues. I hope to God Demi lives to see 30.