@@AriatDesalegnBekele I am aware, but I wanted the full recording because there are other parts of it not included- such as the chest compression attempts
@@AriatDesalegnBekele I am aware, but I was trying to get the whole recording, because there are parts missing - such the chest compression imitations made by Clay
Obviously these "parents" didn't care about Lacey, but how on earth did they live in a house with rotting flesh smells, bodily fluids and maggots. The level of cruelty and neglect is beyond comprehension.
Exactly how do you come home everyday from work and smell that and see their daughter they "cared so much for" right in front of them and them just keep living like nothing ever happened. Unbelievable!!
I hate that my brain goes this route but most likely, Lacey’s dad did something to Lacey and Shiela blamed Lacey for everything. Why else would she refused Lacey to go to the hospital?? Because then, the doctors could have found evidence of other forms of abuse
One hundred percent. I was sexually abused by a family member when I was 5. Before, I was outgoing and chatty and bubbly. Afterwards? I literally stopped talking for the most part. I would only speak to my mom and brother. My brother literally spoke FOR me in public (restaurants, to ask where the bathroom was, etc) until I was 12. It took years for me to recover. I can't even imagine what poor Lacey went through 😢💔
THANK YOU! I have bad social anxiety but am on med for diagnosed severe general anxiety disorder. All are diagnosed and more. She went out using weights, it’s not social anxiety, it being scared of people because she can’t trust people. She started thinking everyone were like her parent. She had severe autism as a girl. Severe autism as a girl is SO different than boys autism. That was not social anxiety to me, that was being severely autistic with role models who made you even more scared of people.
My mother lost her foot and was going through dementia. She was 300lbs and totally bedridden. I and my brother changed her MULTIPLE times a day until she passed.She never had so much as a rash. When the hospital received her corpse (she had a massive heart attack and died before help could come) they were shocked she didn't have a blemish. If two completely inexperienced young adults can manage that with such a large woman, Lacey should have been FAR easier to care for. They left her to rot to death because they couldn't be bothered to care for their own CHILD. They couldn't even be bothered to get her help. How do you do that to another human being, let alone your own child?
100% agree. It's difficult, as you know well, to care for someone who is not mobile but this? I couldn't leave a total stranger in any kind of horror like this, let alone MY OWN CHILD?! Like you said, they could have at least put her in a home! Taken her somewhere that she would be taken care of. But they couldn't even bother to do that much for her. 😢
and there are people here in this comment section defending that it was her choice and I am like... wow. These people exist. They are real. I can't even wrap my head around it.
Exactly , no one wakes up able to be this delusional neglectful and lacking empathy and a conscience . The parents have been that way before they had Lacey . They are dangerous . They couldn't see what the rest of the normal empathic outsiders could see ...... And their supporters ,... wow ..., how disgusting they found so much support,.... sickening .. ... where was Lacey's supporters in the community or church goers ???? . Thank goodness the DA went after them and didn't let them go ..
Also, why not get someone to at least care for her hygiene and nutrition if they were too busy or if it was too hard for them. Its such a weak excuse to say ‘she wanted this’
My son is autistic with Pathological Demand Avoidance and severe anxiety. He absolutely goes through periods where he can't leave his bedroom or maintain his hygiene. You know what I do during those times? 1.Anything I can to help him stay at least a little bit clean - wet wipes, warm bubbly water in a bucket to stim with, buying extra of his safe clothes so I can wash what's dirty and he can wear the clean versions.... 2. Liaise with the professionals who are part of his care team regularly. 3. Support him to recover so we can get back to things being easier for him. Yes that often means low demands for PDA, but that doesn't mean ignoring him, it means finding creative ways to help him do what needs to be done. 4. Stay close by. You know what I DON'T do? Leave my vulnerable child to literally rot for years. *Editing to say I can't believe I've just opened TH-cam to so many notifications. Thank you everyone for your kind words, I didn't expect any response at all! My kid is awesome and honestly it's a privilege to be his Mum. For people saying PDA is new to them - I really recommend the PDA society website for helpful information. ❤️
Thisss. I also wonder if perhaps she had a seizure disorder that eventually affected her into not moving or something. I have a friend who was having seizures for years in her teens but had zero outward signs of it. She just got quiet and unmoving during them and often got in big trouble with parents and teachers, assunihg she was being rude and ignoribg them😭😭
This!💜 This is how you parent a child with your son's diagnosis. Thank you for sharing. Lacey's parents could've done better. They chose not to. Can't imagine why. But it was a choice.
@JCTheSniper15 Stop. You're implying that adults can't be abused or neglected, and that's not true, especially for vulnerable people. Any good parent would have their child forced into care instead of watching them suffer for YEARS on the couch.
@@JCTheSniper15 what you've just said really confuses me. An adult clearly suffering was LEFT to piss, shit, decompose, suffer for 15 YEARS?? Do you have how long a time that is? She was living under their roof, she was their responsibility from the moment she was no longer able to move. No one deserves to be left in those conditions - they prolonged her suffering by not stepping in. How is that not abuse ? They also prevented her from getting the treatment she needed - they specifically refused help from the doctors and then left her to rot?
@JCTheSniper15 being the age to be considered an adult, doesn't mean anything. Dr's clearly diagnosed her with SEVERE autism and social anxiety disorder. I don't care if she is 60 Years old, she was literally rotting away on a couch that her parents walked by every day, she was caked in feces, she had maggots in her ears , couch foam and feces in her stomach because her parents were not feeding her are you saying it's not the other adults responsibility to get her help simply because she was of adult age?
I do not believe for ONE SECOND any of this was Lacey's free will. They made her stay on that sofa and then she couldn't leave and then they stopped cleaning her and feeding her until she died. I am convinced they abused her before. A child doesn't develop social anxiety just like that, when she was described as brilliant, friendly kid before. They did this to her.
I honestly got this feeling as well!! I call it clipping a kids wings when parents do stuff like this, hindering their kids somehow someway.. I don't know why they'd do this to her but I'm with you.. they caused this!
As someone who struggles with social anxiety and agoraphobia I can concur that Lacey probably verbally said she didn't want to leave, but I know inside she was screaming. It's like being trapped inside an invisible cage of your own making. HOWEVER. I have a husband who loves me and when he sees the warning signs (not eating, not talking, no eye contact, won't move for hours on end) he gets my therapist involved asap and does everything he can to get me out of the house or even just opening all the doors and windows so I can have sunlight without having to leave my safe zone. When you love someone you don't let them rot.
Absolutely this. Sometimes I want to sit in my room and rot. My bf will say "you can rot, but you gotta do it out in the living room." And honestly just that change of space can be such an improvement. I don't have what lacey had. But just my personal depression and anxiety is enough. I can't imagine what that poor girl was fighting inside of her own head ❤
I went thru 4 years of severe germ and social anxiety which kept me home. I am thankful for the loving pushes of my family to continue with therapy and psychiatry by televisit and we made a plan and I went through very very slow exposure therapy to get me out of the house. First it was just opening the front door, then standing on the grass, then down to the mailbox... Now I am almost fully recovered and not only can I leave the house and be out in public but I can take my son too. My anxiety was also transferred to my son as I had a miscarriage before him and there was a pandemic and I was terrified of him leaving the house and dying. It is not something I ever imagined would happen to me, but I was absolutely terrified all the time... Even when other people left the house and I stayed home! I would still be stuck in the house 24/7. Had it not been for the loving support of my parents, my husband, my older daughter, the one friend who was willing to do whatever it took even if it meant having a " Play date" at totally opposite ends of the garden garden because I was too afraid to get close, And therapists and doctors. It really can take a team and it would have been really easy for my husband to have just left me. I can't imagine the hell that this young Lady endured. It was a little kindness, understanding and patience. Someone to pick her up and put her in a wheelchair and take her out to the front porch to watch birds. Getting home healthcare through disability services to help with bathing and wound education in order to prevent bed sores etc. It breaks my heart because this kind of thing can honestly happen to absolutely anyone. You can find yourself being a " normal" person who is totally capable of doing whatever to being someone who becomes a shut-in due to grief or someone who gets agoraphobia, has something traumatic happen to them and get PTSD, become bedridden with an injury or illness. We all have the potential to experience illnesses. It is definitely a humbling experience.
Not really, I’ve known lots of ppl like me who literally never have ppl over (in my case it’s cuz my house is too small, and there’s no room to seat more than 3 ppl). There’s lots of other reasons why ppl don’t invite others to their home, and it’s not that hard to avoid. When someone asks to hang out, you suggest a public place like a restaurant or a park. Usually when someone suggests to get together, they offer their house or a public place since inviting yourself over is taboo. I’m js I haven’t had a single guest in over 8yrs, so it’s not that hard to believe someone else out there is doing the same thing.
Nah, it's fairly common. My household was like that when I was growing up. Parents simply super private. Even now, I just don't like people in my space, our place is small. ✌️
This happened not far from where I live. The crazy thing is that they did! They would throw little get togethers. The parents would just close the door to the living room. I have no idea how no one smelled rotting flesh. The whole thing totally flips me out.
Yep. Sponge baths, bringing her meals, even adult diapers and regular cleanings. Even if they didn’t want to do all of that, they had the money to put her in a nice care facility. There is no excuse.
Exactly as I nurse we have a lot of patients who refused to make a shower we still keep them clean and keep up to date with their hygiene no excuse even if she refused they should of forced her and did her hygiene for her and kept her clean.
I agree. They even could have asked for help or advice from others. I am sure there would have been someone willing to help or offer some form of advice. There is no excuse.
Lacey was showing textbook catatonia. Very common for ppl to think the person is choosing not to move,engage, withdrawn, incontinence, if left untreated they can be completely disconnected in all areas of functioning. What's even worse is they are cognitively aware but unable to do anything. When my autistic son was 12 he had severe catatonia and he went from someone who could talk,run,eat,use bathroom,to a 12 yr old infant who couldn't move,talk,eat,use bathroom, he had to be spoon feed, and diapered for 6 months before he recovered. These parents were lucky enough to have doctors recognizing the seriousness of her condition and they still did nothing ughhh
@@rizkiramadhan9266he started treatment when he finally got to see an experienced phyc doc. The wait list was several months but as soon as doc started treatment (benzos, like Ativan, clozapine) he started to improve pretty quickly,thou some ppl have had to undergo several rounds of etc(electric shock therapy) to restart the brains ability to actively function. Ik etc sounds harsh but modern etc is done under sedation and heavily monitored during each session. My son is now 16,he's on medicine to decrease the chances of catatonia reoccurring but there's really no guarantee.
@@CrystalCat24 I'm sorry I thought I responded to this but he was put on benzos ( meds like Ativan, clozapine, Xanax) it's amazing how it more less unlocks catatonia and u see the persons brain wake up. Thou rare some ppl require multiple ETC treatments (electric shock therapy, don't worry it's not the barbaric ETC u may be thinking of, modern ETC is done under sedation and heavily monitored during the treatments) to come out of it. Yes there were times I wondered if he would ever recover. I knew with autism it's common to see regression during puberty but this was beyond anything I could've imagined. It had also triggered his tics to a level I had never seen B4 on anyone..clap clap squeeze poke for hours on end to being stuck like a statue. The best way I can describe it was sorta like when a toy is broken or has dying batteries. Being as he had it so severely he will always be at risk so his doc keeps him on a low dose of clozapine to decrease the risk but it's deff always in the back of my mind. He's now 16 and can use his voice to tell u all about how he completed his goal of using the microwave to make a burrito:)
I'm convinced all the lotion and clean clothes were staged before law enforcement got there. There is no way Lacey's mother was caring for her any time recently.
i think it's possible she had 1) cared for her in the past and just left everything there when she stopped or 2) it was actually supplies to clean with and keep the smell at a minimum
@@rachelcarter9029well considering that the smell was actually so bad that the coroner said it was the worst they’ve ever smelled, I highly doubt it was to keep it at a minimum
As a CNA, there is absolutely no excuse for a person to be in this kind of physical condition. Not when there is bed baths, bed pans, etc. These parents simply did not care about their daughter whatsoever. They could’ve even hired a care giver if they did not want to do so themselves. So foul.
Exactly they could of hired a carer to look after her hygiene if they didn’t want to clean her up this could have been avoided what a sad case. Poor girl she had evil parents 😢
Rotten Mango also covered this one and she mentioned how the maggots on Lacey’s body were doing more help than her parents because maggots eat dead particles and were essentially removing the dead parts of Lacey’s body 🤯🤯
I worked as a wound care nurse for a time, and I can tell you that the smell of rotting flesh is not easy to wash off. There were days when I got off shift that I would take multiple showers before I would go near another person. Taking that and the statement made by the coroner about the smell when he walked into the house, how the hell did the parents not reek when they walked out of that house?! I can understand that they probably stopped smelling everything, but how no one else could smell it on them amazes me!!!!
THAT is an incredibly good point. Makes me think more people knew what was going on. Or that they wore Hazmat gear in the house.. Seriously how did neighbours not report the smell?
maybe they thought it would be rude to tell a couple of middle-aged people they smelled like literal death? I've encountered some older folks who just seem to have an unfortunate smell despite being clean, so that would be my first thought.
I've waited on people before who have literally smelled like they were rotting/ just hadn't bathed or changed clothes for weeks/ months 😔 most of the time. It was just sad and awful but I always wondered how they just didn't realize...
I can't imagine the kind of pain Lacey endured before she died. How anyone could just stand by and watch their own child rot like that is unfathomable to me.
This is so cruel so heartbreaking 😭😭 Even hard to believe how it is possible not to care for a daughter for a day let alone years and years..... And the pain she must have endured 😭😭 I cant and dont even want to imagine .... Why do some people have to suffer so much 😭😭😭
Honestly i appreciate how angry you get talking about this kind of stuff, it's the appropriate response. Most true crime content is.... a little less empathetic.
Sometimes, it might just be that the storyteller avoids anger. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't have empathy. Personally, I'm an extreme empath due to childhood trauma. The trauma also created a lot of anger. After so many years, I'm able to minimize that emotion. It doesn't mean that I condone bad behavior. It only means I don't want to suffer the effects of anger. I hope this makes sense. To be clear, I'm not saying Danielle is doing anything wrong. I'm a big fan of hers. She's very good at her job here. ❤
In 2012, my life was in complete chaos. Along with me and my husband Fred, lived my son, his girlfriend, her 2 kids, and his 2 little boys on the weekends. I had a mental breakdown and didn't leave my bedroom for 5 months. My family was quite interfering with my self imposed exile. They wouldn't leave me be. After listening to this, I thank God they loved me enough to support and care for me.
Im a hairstylist and me and my coworkers often work with extreamly matted hair. It's not uncommon to spend a full work day dematting someone's hair and salvaging as much length as possible. It happens a lot more than you'd think, depression, addiction, and physical illness can all cause some pretty severe matting. I cannot imagine the pain Lacy was in from her hair alone. I've seen mold, yeast infections, open sores, and tension alopecia all from 1-4 weeks of neglect. The idea that her hair was probably the least painful thing she was experiancing is just pure horror.
What strikes me is that they made that decision to not get her help every day. You can kill someone in a spur of a moment where the decision is made once and very quickly, but that's not what happened here. They decided so many times to not take action and so many times it took her closer to death.
Pretty sure they saw her rotting body EVERY SINGLE day and decided to not do a thing. No sane person would even leave a stranger in that state, let alone their own flesh and blood family
I could have been Lacy if not for my parents. In my teens, I developed major depressive disorder and an anxiety disorder. After a few years, it progressed into full-blown agoraphobia. I didn't leave my home for a full year. My parents told me once it was easier to let me stay home where they knew I was safe and cared for. Yet, when they thought about me, fully as a person, it wasn't the life they wanted for me. They got me the right kind of help- therapy which included medication to break the excessive anxiety and I emerged on the other side of my disease. I remember those days being frozen in my mind and body filled with fear. I can't imagine enduring 15 years. If you would have asked me during my year indoors if I was happy I'd say yes just like Lacy supposedly said. Yes, but I was ill. This was in the 90's when mental health issues were more stigmatized. No one took medication or saw a psychologist. It wasn't talked about. My parents felt like they had somehow failed me. BUT THEY GOT ME THE HELP ANYWAY. It didn't matter what anyone else said about me or how they handled the situation. I feel these two needed to keep up appearances more than help their daughter. Imagine was everything. That woman could have led a full happy life if she got help. I hope those two rot.
I really resonated with your comment, at around 20 years old i became a complete recluse after an abusive relationship.. I had diagnosed depression and anxiety and i guess the abuse caused a mental break. I didnt leave my house for a little over a year, rarely left my room let alone my bed. This also could of easily been me until my mother needed help with bills and i got a job. I have no idea how i was able to do it, I think i just really didnt want to burden my mother any more than i already was. Im glad youre better today and continue to thrive 💓
I’m an ER nurse- and you would be shocked how many times people come into the department in this condition- ALIVE. It’s more prevalent than you can imagine.
Lacy's parents didn't take her to get help because having a "less than perfect" child would look bad for their image. If they took her out of the house people would know about their daughter having autism and that didn't fit their image. Now them trying to uphold their perfect image has cost them everything and should they ever get out, the world already knows that they are monsters. Poor Lacy, you're free now without pain or neglect, all you feel is love 🙏🏽🕊❤
My theory…she was abused sexually by her “father” and so she became more withdrawn. Once her “mother” found out, she resented lacy and let her rot. They stopped getting her help once it was suggested she got to the hospital because they didn’t want rape evidence to show up.
I think you're very likely onto something. Maybe not even rape evidence considering I'm sure after some time it was no longer available but possibly they feared Lacey speaking out. It would make sense why she didn't do it in her own bedroom but in an open room with little to no privacy.
I hope you have people who care for you, if not please reach out for help. I know it won't help much to assuage your anxiety but this poor victim had horrible people around her. I will pray for you and hope you have good people. You, nor anyone, deserves treatment like this. There are people who care.
If ever you feel neglected or that you need help, please please please say something to anyone. 🙏 People care. If one person doesn't help, keep reaching out to others. When vulnerable people need help, even strangers will step up to help. As you can see by Danielle's reaction. Her emotions about this case are not unique. ❤
I dont understand how one time over the FIFTEEN YEARS of Lacey sitting on that couch that neither of her parents had a come to jesus moment and did something to help her. I feel bad if I accidentally sleep in and don't feed my cat on time, knowing that she is dependent on me and she went hungry even for an hour makes me feel horrible. How could you watch your daughter slowly die over 15 years....
I know!!! I wash my dog on a “schedule “ and if I’m a couple days over I’m like half panicking. I get up Monday-Friday on a schedule and I like to sleep in on Saturday and I still wake to feed my dog and let her out so I technically don’t even “sleep in”
Yeahits not easy to understand, the scene of her in her own filth , how did they look at that and be ok with it ? The smell ffs . they got used to the smelll of their daughter literally rotting to death
I’m with you on this. I have fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis in both knees and 5 slipped discs. Pain gets BAD. But I also have a dog and a cat who didn’t ask to come into my life. So I go to work to afford food for them. I buy them food and treats. I bring the dog, a chiweenie, outside. And I empty the kitty litter. Because they deserve that care and then some. And I did the same for my kids before they left the nest.
But also what about the doctors? They say Lacey needed to be committed. She was refusing to eat, use a toilet or leave the sofa and the house. Her parents clearly couldn’t care for her, and by refusing to have her committed obviously couldn’t make decisions in Lacey’s best interests. Did they not follow up? Did they not refer her to other people/services that could go over the parents’ heads if need be. Lacey was failed so badly by people who were supposed to care for her, poor woman.
How much HATE does it take to do that to your own child? Your own child with a disability. For 12 years!The profound abilism, prejudice and ignorance towards neurodiversity, cruelty and an enormous amount fo sadism... The audacity to say the loved her.
"They loved her to death. They loved her to a fault." This is beyond comprehension. Unbelievable. I should have put the quotes in my previous comment. I'm saying the exact wording from my previous comment. I also think my comment wasn't fully read and was misunderstood.
No, that's not love. I never said that. I was NOT defending the parents nor excusing their heinous actions against their daughter. That appalling statement was said by the attorney for the parents. I was repeating that statement because it was unfathomable. I was trying to make a point of how he or anyone could defend these evil parents and how disgusting that they allowed it to happen to their daughter. Good grief.
My older brother has one of the more severe forms of autism and my mother knew that she wasn't equipped to take care of him, though she did try, so what did she do? She put him in a home. The home has been taking care of him for 30 plus years, and he's actually doing very well.They send frequent updates on his progression, and he can actually say a couple of words now. Some people may judge parents for putting children in a home.But I think it's a lot better and more responsible to do that rather than neglecting them.
This is exactly what I was thinking about. I work as a behavior support aide for children with disabilities. I know Parents get concerned when their kids get old enough to graduate school, but there is no shame in putting them into a home or adult daycare if you don't have the resources. This girl could have THRIVED in a home with people who were trained to take care of her.
How do you live in your home and walk by your sofa seeing your child like this? Decorating the tree?! Wouldn’t the smell get to you? The things good parents would do for their children. These people are the worst of the worst.
It takes MINIMAL care to keep someone in decent care. Even if she chose to not get up, they couldve wash her, fed her, clipped nails, etc. Blaming their neglect on their child is wild.
I can tell you as someone who worked in a home for people with severe disabilities, no, it is NOT easy to change and move someone, esp an adult. We had mechanical lifts to be able to move them to change their diapers and change their clothes. It usually took at least two of the male staff members to get them moved and repositioned. I am not excusing what the parents did, they could have gotten her in to one of these places, obviously they exist, but no, it is NOT easy to care for an immobile adult.
@@HeatherE303 but at the same time. If you clipped her nails ones a month, they wouldnt be extremely long. And if you cut her hair and brushed it once a week, it wouldnt be a 20x20 matted ball. Etc. She would still get sick and she would get soars etc. But at least you wouldve tried. They didnt even try...
@@HeatherE303They didn't say it was easy. They said it takes minimal care. A.K.A. A washdown every week, brushing her hair once a week, giving her gruel or water through a straw IDFK. Something. Anything. But no one said it would be easy. But that's minimal care.
This case has haunted me since I heard about it. What Lacey went through was inhumane. I'm 31 now, but when I was in my early 20s, I struggled with agoraphobia. Sometimes I didn't want to leave my room. My parents were understanding, but constantly checked on me to make sure I was okay and if I needed anything. Eventually, they got me out and about comfortably. There is ZERO excuse for what her parents did, or what they claim happened. That poor woman... May Lacey rest in eternal peace. 🕊
@@lilmisskiss692003 Thank you! I still struggle as well, especially now living with chronic illness. Congrats on your progress! That's something to be so proud of. ♥
I’ve had agoraphobia for 27 years, I’m so glad you were able to fight it. It can be very isolating, and it’s always reassuring in a way to see someone else talk about it and know you’re not alone.
i’ve had agoraphobia for about 10 years now, my mother was (and is still when it acts up, luckily mine is mostly sort of dormant{?}) incredibly supportive and was always gentle when pushing me to try to push the boundaries and there for me if it didn’t work out well. i can not even fathom my own mother behaving like lacey’s parents
Okay I’ll ask: didn’t your family SMELL it on their family? Didn’t anyone go into the house? How did those vile people fool your family for so long? And what have you all learned? Wow.
@@laurazielinski2437 no, strangely enough. Nobody thought anything was going on. They also kept thier distance though. Nobody went to thier house ever. They didn't leave much either. Just the kind of people you recognize at the store and catch up with at check out and then you dont see for a few more years. Its really eerie. Hell really is empty and all the devils are here.
Re: her shirt exposing her chest. A news report I watched said her dad had tried to pull a shirt on her I think while the authorities were on their way. He was trying to make it look slightly better than it was, but he couldn’t get it on her. So that’s why it was only half on.
Fancy seeing you here! The absolutely ridiculous idea that her having a t-shirt on makes the situation look better just does my head in! You know they were scrambling because they knew they were royally screwed! Xx
If that house smelled so bad, how did the parents not smell when they went out? How could everyone around them not notice and think something was wrong??
@@tiffaniecross2209 I'm a taxi driver and people smell of the restaurant they've been in for a few hrs when they get in my car. I can usually smell if people have cats or dogs and most drinkers have a sickly sweet smell. I can't believe these people didn't honk to high heaven either!
@@WolfDreamer101 what's pathic is calling people evil criminals because they didn't deal with a crazy person the way you imagine a crazy person should be dealt with.
This case hits me hard. Lacey is a lot like me in many ways, and while I can't speak to her parents' motivations, I can speak to my own parents'. My story started out a lot like Lacy, except my parents refused to let me get diagnosed with autism. My parents had tried so hard to have a baby, and they resented the fact that they finally had one, and it was "defective". They did go about it differently though. Once I was a legal adult, I got myself an autism diagnosis. The doctor sat down with my parents and told them I wouldn't be able to take care of myself without years of occupational therapy. My mother said, and I quote, "f*ck that" and threw me out of the house two days later. I was 19, and I was homeless for over a year. I've managed to claw myself to where I am now, at 28 (well, I will be 28 in a few weeks), and my parents insist they did the right thing and the doctor was clearly wrong because I'm still alive, as if they didn't put me in a situation where my only options were literally to either learn very fast or die. I'm alive, but I'm barely functional. Though they frequently still berate me because I'm not as far in life as my peers, despite the fact that I'm already playing the Game of Life in Hard Mode and them figuratively kicking my legs out from under me on top of that. They say I owe them because in the last couple years, they've given me some money when I was sick (I had COVID once, and then bronchitis multiple times) and missed a few weeks of work and couldn't make my rent on my apartment. But frankly, I think they're lucky I still speak to them at this point. Oh, and also my mother has admitted to my younger sister that she planned to drown me in the bathtub when I was little because I was "difficult" (aka, I had undiagnosed autism) But yeah. This case hits me hard, but it doesn't surprise me much. One of the most common causes of death in autistic children is their own parents. Lacy was an adult when she finally died, but I think her slow death started long, long ago.
You are so resilient! I’m sorry to hear that you didn’t get the right kind of help, but kudos to you for doing everything you can for yourself. You communicate very clearly and intelligently in your writing, which is a wonderful skill to have. You will continue to do well, despite the lack of love and care from your family. Keep it up. You are worthy.
@@viviannichols3582 She indeed is incredibly strong. I cannot begin to fathom what it must feel like or how one would cope. The fact that she continues to communicate with them is astonishing. I truly hope she has found happiness, and I wish her nothing but the very best for the future.
As a registered nurse, I've seen patients in very similar situations, still alive, end up in the hospital to die from septic shock. It's heartbreaking.
I have to say, that argument that “It was Lacey’s decision. She’s an adult.” That’s BS. She has severe autism. Making her disabled. Hence all decisions fall back to her parents. Her parents who couldn’t be bothered.
My daughter is an only child. Autistic. Low IQ. Name starts with an L and is two syllables like Lacey. This story hit so close to home. I watched this video yesterday and had my daughter sleep in bed with me last night because of how much this case rattled me. No one deserves the treatment Lacey received, but ESPECIALLY one with special needs. My heart is absolutely broken.
hearing that feces and sofa foam was found in her stomach was very upsetting, i can’t imagine being in a situation where that’s all i have to eat. so heartbreaking
as an autistic person with self-isolating tendencies, this hit so hard, I've had moments like this where I would not want to leave my bed or couch for weeks and the only way I was able to get out of it was because of my friends and family.
If i can offer some unsolicited advice...You may consider finding a check-in buddy. You don't have to be social about it, just a text daily or every few days to say "checking in safe today" so if suddenly you stop doing it, someone will know to call or come by. I'm a single mom and the only adult in my home, and one of my biggest fears is that something could happen to me and no one would know my child is here with no one to take care of her. I do a daily check with my mom, who also lives alone and tends to self-isolate and i worry about what if she has a stroke or something. It gives my mom and I both a sense of safety that we know each other are okay or at least know when to worry, even if we're not feeling social and arent trying to chat really.
@@tinygreenpeaYou’re right. I am autistic and tend to self-isolate. I obsess over certain solo activities so I’m not laying in bed, but I have a neighbor who checks in with me 3-4 times a day from 8am to 10pm. She uses tough love to make me get out of the house for an hour here or just ride with her to her boutique. She’s going through a hellish divorce from a malignant narcissist but she still finds the care to check in on me. I’m lucky to have her.
I’m autistic myself and I can relate. I’ve had times where I felt so depressed that I would isolate myself from the family and I would stay in a dark room. Luckily I haven’t done that in months. Thankfully I’m doing so much better now.
I have a theory that at one point one of the parents physically assaulted her and she was too brain damaged to move. I think that explains why they didn't send her to the hospital. They didn't want people to find out that they abused her and then neglected her. No way she had a say in this. Also crazy they called HER lazy when they couldnt even care for their daughter in this situation
Either that or they didn't want Lacey to tell medical staff about other horrific abuse. The fact that she suddenly changed drastically in young adolescence points to something pretty terrible.
I've been deep diving into this case and researching what I can and this is pretty much the theory (physical abuse either from someone else or the parents) I've come to as well. Something happened to cause that massive shift in personality and sudden profound autism diagnosis. I'm autistic too as well as a parent and I cannot wrap my head around it. ALSO if they truly loved Lacey, they would've told the whole truth about what happened. All interviews and reports I've found is the parents giving excuses and lies to protect themselves.
@xchrononautx I completely agree. I think this case is a pretty good albeit extreme showcase of how people misunderstand autism and how that can be dangerous. I'm autistic and a parent as well, my brother is autistic as well as my father. With sensory issues and other things, there is just no way I see an autistic person being okay with existing this way. I mean, nobody would be okay with existing like this, and I understand hygiene and sensory issues are different for different for different people on the spectrum, but it just doesn't track as she was not this way before. Even if it was just her "choice" to live like this (not buying that at all), if the parents really gave a crap they would have bathed her or moved her once in a while or maybe got a new couch. Called a doctor. Not HID her. I think their actions say it all tbh. Had they just brought her to the hospital in the first place they might have actually gotten away with it. Sad and it also makes me wonder how much of her "personality change" wasn't actually autism at all but just the result of trauma.
@@hailylazore2021 absolutely agree with you. I don't think there's any other documented case where a sudden change like that is diagnosed as profound autism unless Lacey had been masking for such a long time that she eventually mentally broke?
My son has autism, and it breaks my heart anytime I hear someone taking advantage of the disability, and victimizing these people. Especially parents who should be the ones sticking up for them. My heart just breaks..
I'm glad your son has someone who feels this way. My mother thought since she was physically disabled that my autism didn't matter and she never got me any help and now I am a very very fed adult
@aidanangalia8868 I am so sorry to hear that. As a parent it hurts. I work hard to make sure my son is cared for, and feels safe. I am not perfect by far, but I knew when I decided to start a family that my child could be aflicted with all sorts of things that would make their life challenging. I told myself I would always do my best to care for them accordingly, and know I am lucky to have them in my life. I have noticed that most parents who fall short in those areas are often struggling mentally themselves. I had some of the difficulties my son has when I was growing up, and my mother was really mean to me. She is a pretty big Narcissist, and suffered abuse of her own. That does not make any of it in any way right, but maybe your mother had similar mental issues. Either way I hope you know that you have value as human being, and your life has a purpose. ❤️
I’m a parent of an adult with autism & I have fought for my son his entire life and got him as much therapy and assistance as I could possibly give him. And I’m so proud of him. I also can’t imagine doing this to a child. How can anyone be so cruel.
I’ve heard this case several times, but nobody else really conveyed how truly horrific what happened to poor Lacey was. When it comes to true crime, and dead bodies in general, I have a strong stomach but the way you told it, I felt nauseous. It’s so awful. But thank you for telling it. You’re not clinical, or dismissive or …. I don’t know how to put it but you’re DIFFERENT. It’s so clear that you care. Deeply. And it makes me care more. And i know that’s a weird thing to thank you for, but sometimes I get really jaded, but the way you tell her story, your caring, even your anger help restore my faith in people. So, thanks for being you.
Honestly, it shouldn't be so easy to pull children out of school. Parents should have to provide evidence their kids were either transferred to another school or are actively being homeschooled which, in that case, should be actively monitored for the safety and education of the child
You are 100% right, homeschool kids are left alone, CPS should do regular controls on them, considering the long list of abuse cases that start with the child being pull out of school and isolated.
Homeschooled children are on average, MUCH safer at homeschool than they are in public school. My daughters school has multiple security guards at each entrance, at least 2 police on campus at all times, and still has at least a couple violent fights a month and wide spread drug use. The last thing ANYONE needs is more government intervention into private citizens lives...or didn’t the government response to covid enlighten you to that fact?
Nobody caught that she had neuro and developmental disabilities until she was 14. In Louisiana, private school teachers are not required to be certified. That means unlike a public school, they are not always mandatory reporters.
@@michelledml3162 I respect parents rights to homeschool children but I've heard too many CA cases of neglectful/abusive parents pulling their children out of school before tragedy happened. If you aren't harming your children it should be no issue to comply with laws designed to protect minors but, I also respect your perspective. There has to be some sort of middle ground
@@kageyama1083Plus 90% of parents don’t have the organization/discipline/intelligence to homeschool effectively. Unfortunately many parents love to say otherwise, but it’s the truth. There’s a reason why teachers have to go to school for years to become a teacher.
This is so horrific… a note on maggots though… some species only eat rotting flesh and are used in many countries to clean festering wounds. The maggots probably kept her alive a lot longer than she would’ve survived by preventing severe infections for so long. It’s so horrific what she went through and that her parents could obviously see the maggots on her and not fucking do a thing. As a mom of four- one with OCD and autism- I just can’t imagine giving up on her. It’s well beyond heartbreaking… this is goddamn infuriating.
it’s not just that she fused with the couch, she did, but...i saw some early photos and half of her body was IN the couch. if you see the couch pic, that’s only where half her body would be if you really look. the other half was inside the couch…just…gosh your points are very interesting. i didn’t know about the maggots that can keep people alive. lacey’s case truly broke my heart. i’ll never forget her. 🤍🕊️🤍
I bet the parents never really went into that room at all. How did they avoid the horrible sewer smell every day? When you have a bag of trash that is sitting around for a couple days it stinks to high heavens. Who could live in a house like that? Their clothes don’t start to smell like the house? 😮
@@JennM-ty7je she was in the living room… and Danielle spoke of times they put up Christmas trees a few feet away from Lacy, posting photos on the internet to prove it. They were in there at least some of the time. Personally, I think they definitely saw her and just acted as if she didn’t exist. After 10+ years, they learned to ignore her, even the odor. Smells basically disappear to your brain after a while (it’s why you can almost never tell if you, yourself, have bad breath unless you really try… your brain becomes numb to it, so to speak). Im sure you’re definitely right about the folks smelling funny though… but maybe they were good at masking it or keeping at arms length from others so it wasn’t as noticeable? That one definitely makes me curious too.
My grandmother had a stroke. The doctors said it was likely she could get most of her quality of life back with physical therapy. She didn't want to do physical therapy and would cry. My grandfather couldn't bear to see her cry so no physical therapy. She didn't get any better. Family members fought to get her placed into facilities where she could get proper care. She would cry and my grandfather would take her home. She did have trouble with bed sores. She did get infections. Every visit with them was a battle because she wanted to be at home and he refused to upset her. But he was simply too old to take proper care of her. It took a toll on his health, too. Eventually, he died of a heart attack and she died in her sleep a week later. Their lives could have been so much better if he had just found the courage to tell her no. If she had gone to therapy she could have walked and talked again. If she had stayed in a care facility she would have likely improved enough that living at home wouldn't have been an issue. But things went downhill because he couldn't find the courage to make her do things she didn't want to do. I'm glad my grandparent's situation didn't get this bad, but given more time I'm sure it would have gotten worse. If you love someone be willing to upset them when it's a necessity. Sometimes you have to choose their life over their wishes.
I agree. It's called "tough love" and it needs to happen sometimes for a person to improve and get better. Being an enabler to someone does far more damage than pushing someone in the right direction.
I kind of thought through a similar scenario as this listening to this story. Early on it sounds as if they were in denial of how serious her condition was. They probably thought and hoped it was a phase that would pass. I bet early on her mom did do the things she said she did to take care of her daughter, but I imagine eventually that's taxing on the caregivers too. It's not an excuse, just a possibly scenario I see. They still had the opportunity when they become overwhelmed to seek further assistance and they chose not to. It's so sad to think of where Lacey's mind must have been for 12 years. Did she stop at 24 and lock in to the past or was fully engaged in her surroundings watching life pass her by or was she entranced and in her mind living in a Disney movie, probably feeling like Sleeping Beauty waiting on her prince to come wake her. She was a beautiful girl with such a bright smile. So sad to think of how her life was spent.
The Google street view was really eerie and it made me think...you literally never know what's happening behind closed doors or in any of the homes you might pass by every day.
Ugh god this situation absolutely infuriates me. The simple disregard for human life when all Lacey's parents could have done was call someone to take her. They'd be lousy parents for never bothering to visit her in care but for god's sake she deserved at least that. My mom has MS and has been bedridden for years and has nurses come out to give her care daily as well as family to help her. I couldnt fucking imagine subjecting my mother to that, and these two just let this poor woman suffer.
I have MS. Hope my children are as kind as you when my disability progresses. They are already very helpful. God bless you and your Mom. You are both in my prayers.
I have a STRONG stomach. Never once in all the time I have watched true crime content, have I ever debated on skipping ahead or waiting to finish the video until after I finish my dinner... This case is... on a whole other level. I am disgusted, horrified and enraged. Thank you, Danielle, for handling this case with the same delicate grace as you always do, while also sharing every detail. I appreciate the attention you give to these cases, even the one that made my skin crawl
i'm from and live in louisiana, been watching your vids for years. just wanna say great coverage and sensitivity of this story, you really know your stuff and do THE MOST when it comes to deep dives. i remember when this happened in my area and tons of people were absolutely shocked. anyway, thank you dani for your factual attention to detail and respect to this case.
Danielle's anger at this family and the people around that didn't care is absolutely palpable. As someone that grew up in abuse that everyone knew about and everyone ignored, its cathartic. Reminds me that there are normal, empathetic, caring people out there. Its cathertic in a way. Thank you for sharing with us, and caring so much about these victims. You spread awareness. ❤
This case haunts me. Hearing about Lacey makes me think of my own son. Autism, low IQ, interests are a bit young for him. If one day he stopped being the kid who chases the dog around the house, rides his bike, and loves bowling, I would stop at nothing to help him feel like himself again. I have known for a long time I will always have to care for him in some way and I'll do that til I am gone. I canNOT imagine my baby rotting into a couch bc I failed him so horribly. Despicable.
I cannot comprehend how parents are able to do this. We're supposed to care and protect our kids. It's beyond disturbing when parents can harm and cause their children's death.
Danielle you nailed this case, I've been waiting for more information forever... You've given the most information available... And your reaction is so valid. Tbh sometimes I find you to overreact to cases if they have been overly covered... I can't speak I cry at everything.. But wow... You're the 1st you tuber I follow to share new and valid information and emotion. Thanks for this info and your honest angry sarcastic story was exactly how I felt watching.
Wow this hits hard, I can't stop crying for Lacy. I'm a 36 year old woman with autism, adhd, severe anxiety and agoraphobia. It sounds like she may have developed agoraphobia, but sadly, we will never know. So, when you say, she was aware of everything right up to her death I really hope that wasn't the case. I will never know Lacy as a person, but I know myself, and in times of severe mental health crises I have "escaped" into my own mind before. Maybe it's a defense mechanism to cope, but I've escaped so far into my own mind that I couldn't feel the pain of hunger or being tired anymore. Maybe her last days on earth were spent in her mind in a Disney movie, maybe she was a Disney princess, again we won't know because the people around her didn't try to get her help. And she wasn't in her room, she fled to the couch in a time of need, which is something I often did as a kid when I was sick or upset. I stayed out on the couch instead of my room so my parents could help me. I wish Lacy's parents had helped her.
On the maggots, they'll only eat dead flesh. They won't eat live flesh. I think they're sometimes actually used in some medical fields to keep a wound clean and remove the dead flesh. So it's probably reasonable to say that the maggots kept her alive longer than she should have been. Frankly the treatment of this girl is horrific and disgusting. It honestly astounds me that someone could not only do that to another person, but their own relative, their own child. How they could just go about their own lives, walking past her multiple times a day. It's a whole other level of avoidance
Did you see there was a similar thing that happened where a woman here in the USA that refused to get off the toilet. Her BF left her there for two years. He brought her food, he’d sit on the tub to chat with her, but left her there. A crew had to physically remove her from the toilet and she had fused to the toilet seat
How about you call an ambulance and tell them she won’t get off the toilet? Sorry I just don’t see the honesty in that situation. How did she sleep like that?
I was immediately thinking of that case when I started watching this. I believe she was grossly obese and couldn’t get up from the toilet. So boyfriend couldn’t move her and they both just went on with life such as it was.
I just know that her parents were ableists who thought, well she was just fine before, so she’s faking this and choosing to be “lazy”, let’s let her deal with the “natural” consequences until she “chooses” to change. I just KNOW that’s how they felt. Disgusting. Poor girl just needed support.
and they used the "well what can we do? she's an adult", even if your kid is an adult if they're literally rotting right in front of your eyes, you do something to help
Yes omg. Its baffling to my mind but you made it make some sense and its still just baffling tbh. Jfc. Taking the this is the consequences of your own actions to an extreme. Omfg.
If you are mentally or physically disabled even with being an adult you have limitations you need help with. I have physical disabilities and get help when I'm able to. Autism and cognitive issues reduces your mental age. Her physical age is 36 but mental age around mid teens. Lacey's parents wouldn't have understood this with saying she's an adult
I wish we could know what happened to this poor woman. I have a daughter with autism and I couldn't imagine not wanting to give her plenty of opportunities to have a great life.
i cannot comprehend why they would refuse hospitalization… like they clearly did not care at all about this poor girl and if they were capable of this absolutely insane level of neglect you’d think they would jump at the chance to “get rid of her”in a way by having her institutionalized typically i would never condone parents shipping off their children to avoid actually parenting them, but in this case the best thing for lacey would’ve been to be completely removed from these awful excuses for parents, no matter how upsetting it might’ve been at first
@@christinegraytruecrimeshe looked like a doll, I mean she looked so thin and emaciated that my brain can’t comprehend an actual person looking like she did.
You know what you do if your child refuses to leave the couch, including to meet their bodily needs? Call an ambulance and have them committed to a psychiatric ward so they can get the help they need -- whether they want to go or not. I think there is something WAY more sinister going on than what theyre claiming. It goes above and beyond neglect. The parents had to have seen her melting into the couch, especially if they're bringing her food every day. They had to have smelled her, seen the bed sores, the urine burns, her muscles atrophying (so she couldnt move even if she wanted to). They HAD to have been getting some weird sadistic gratification out of watching her in that state. I wouldn't be surprised if they initially restrained her, and then after months or years of being restrained, unable to move, and half starved, they removed the restraints (or maybe they melted away, if they used rope) because she couldn't move anyway.
this case has absolutely haunted me to my core, it has since i heard about it. i just want to give her a hug and tell her i’m sorry. i can’t grasp how someone can do this to a person to someone they claimed they loved
As someone who grew up in Louisiana, a big part of the culture is one of polite privacy. As gossipy as it can get, people rarely pry very deep because it is considered impolite. On top of that, there still exist stigmas against mental health in the Deep South that leads to a lack of understanding and treatment. None of this is an excuse, but might bring some understanding to some of the aspects of the case.
as a southerner who also has autism... this is where I'd like to point out the difference between manners and kindness. they overlap, but when your manners no longer keep to kindness... seems to me that's really just classism prettied up, isn't it? the older I get, the less use I have for manners and the more I appreciate kindness.
I live in Louisiana as well but to me it seems pretty normal to not ask neighbors where their adult/almost adult children are, unless you're close to them. I live in an apartment complex and have no idea what my neighbors, much less their family, are doing.
I think you do a disservice to folk of the Deep South to even suggest that there is even a sliver of understanding of the abusive and cruel behaviours of these monsters.
Parents who refuse to treat their autistic children as human beings deserve an extra special place in hell. As an autistic/otherwise disabled person myself, this situation is absolutely horrifying.
I am always thankful for my mum but this just makes me so grateful that she is not neglectful of me. I’m 25 and whilst I can still do some things, outside of my home I need a wheelchair or mobility aids, I need her to take me to my appointments and speak for me etc. I can’t work because of my autism plus other health conditions making my day to day life unpredictable and painful. my autism isn’t extremely high support needs but I do have moderate support needs. I have mental health problems including cptsd from childhood abuse from my father, and need support for that. I cannot imagine the horror of having a parent treat you like that, and that’s coming from someone who was abused by their parent. This goes beyond abuse. There isn’t even a word for it. I hope Lacey is in a better place and I hope her parents rot themselves.
I also sleep on a sofa due to GERD that makes me asphyxiate on acid during the night if I lay anywhere near flat, and my sleep is not restful at all. It makes my pain worse. I’ve been sleeping on it for over 4 years and i can’t describe how sleeping on it makes me feel exhausted even when I’ve just woken up. There definitely NO WAY that woman slept next to her daughter every night.
It's kind of weird in the U.S. because a lot of college-aged students leave home and don't go back for many reasons. I know a few people who are estranged from their families. So, it's really not odd for the neighbors to not question it, depending on what the parents tell everyone. But it's sad for Lacey, for sure.
I don't even believe that her parents ever loved Lacey. I believe that, given their "status" and reputations, they were trying to give off the "Ideal American Family" image, but didn't genuinely care about actually getting Lacey the help she clearly needed. It seems eventually her parents thought it would be easiest to basically leave her and forget about her, erasing her from their lives. Her mother posting on FB about how their lives were going while not even acknowledging Lacey is absolutely unacceptable. I understand that having someone with disabilities, physical and/or mental, can make taking care of someone very difficult. But a family or loved ones who genuinely love the person, will do anything and everything in their power to help the person and give then their best life. These monsters clearly did not give a DAMN about Lacey. They don't deserve the oxygen to keep them alive. They could have called nurses and care givers to help. But no. They denied even the most basic help.
I feel like the parents should at least be charged and convicted of criminal negligence and manslaughter. They may not have wanted to kill her, but they let her suffer and die anyways when they had a lot of time to intervene and get her the medical attention she desperately needed
As a severely disabled woman, I'm so very grateful for my daughter and carers. She will never let me go to a retirement home for similar reasons. I cannot imagine allowing another human being to suffer in such a way. Breaks my heart. Thank you Danielle, for putting your heart out there with each and every story you tell. ❤
You are blessed.💜 I'm in recovery from a cardiac arrest and episodes of intestinal infections (ugh) so I'm staying with my daughter and her husband. It's frustrating to not be able to do things like before but it's beautiful to have family who'll treat us with respect and care. Thanks for sharing! Take care 😊
Cases like this get me especially badly, any involving disability. I'm disabled, and I'm SO lucky to have people who support me and care about me, but many don't. Disabled people are seen as "vulnerable" for many reasons, and they're more likely to face abuse and neglect than those without disabilities.
I'm surprised they even called it in. Why give 40 if half of it is suspended??! Why did they get to continue to be out on bail. Absolutely disgusting miscarriage of justice.
I have autism, and I thank my lucky stars every single day that I have such a great family and support-system. It breaks my heart when hearing about how some of my autistic brothers and sisters are being treated 💔💔💔
I lost a partner to sepsis and its quick.....not long that i know of. It was a friday a doctor came out gave him antibiotics and said "ill see you monday" anyway that night I phoned 999 but an ambulances wouldnt come out!! So I kept my eye on him and noticed it worsening and phoned back then next day....which is when they came....the day after he passed away, just by a bloody cut on his leg, he was 36 years old!! Ambulance wouldnt take him because he was shouting he didnt want one but i kept saying he wasn't in his right state of mind, he wasnt compus mentis.... Needless to say he never made it to the monday God bless him. Like you said it doesnt take 12 years to die from this. People please learn more about sepsis, it will kill you if not treated right.
I’ve thought a lot about this and I wonder if it’s like when you’d hear in the old days…people would be locked in attics and such to keep the rest of the family from feeling “shame” and “embarrassment”. I think they valued their reputations so much that they hoped she’d just die quietly. I hope by Lacey’s horrible condition and death that other people will be proactive in getting help for their loved ones. We live in the richest country in the world…it’s shocking this could ever happen
I really don't believe it was neglect. It was, - in my opinion - , on purpose , because they saw her as a disappointment, a failure in their - could be - perfect life. She, a person with authority, carrier, power, give birth to ... "something" less than perfect; beneath their expectations? No!!! I was surprised they called 911 and not tried to just get completely rid of her by buring her somewhere; noone was asking about her anyway...
I just looked up Lacey on Google and watched the news segment on her that showed the blurred the photos. The one of Lacey laid face down on the autopsy table just shocked me and made me cry. So little of her left. I read on her Wikipedia page that her parent said they wanted to be parents not caregivers. Being a parent is being a caregiver. I don't think Lacey's autism and cognitive issuses were understood by her parents. God bless you Lacey R.I.P no more suffering xx
Her parents are straight up EVIL! If they didn't want to clean her and care for her, they could have committed her to a hospital where she would have received ACTUAL CARE! I don't care how much of a "burden" it is....I would NEVER treat another human being this way...LET ALONE MY OWN CHILD! DESPICABLE AND DISGUSTING! I do pray they will get judged harshly for this in the next life!
It's possible that lacey had or developed severe agoraphobia ( i think that is what it is and how it's spelled), where she was terrified to leave the home and even the couch, but it is 10000% on her parents for not stepping in and helping her, for not hospitalizing long before it had gotten this for.
A reminder that neglect is also a form of abuse. Inaction to do something when you could have done ANYTHING to help the situation is just as bad as any form of abuse.
I work with adults with developmental disabilities. They had options. There are a million interventions I can think of off hand. Their sentence was BS. This is one of worst cases of neglect and abuse Ive ever heard of. I cant even think of a punishment bad enough. Im just appalled.
I know of a similar situation. A guy in his late 40s who hasn’t left his parents basement in over a decade, except when he was unconscious. He has liver failure (because he’s an alcoholic,he gets his alcohol from his parents) he’s a diabetic and has major heart issues. He is yellow due to jaundice from liver failure. His parents are facilitating his slow suicide. He will die in that basement and probably soon.
Hey guys - you can go to audible.com/danielle or text danielle to 500-500 for a free trial of Audible 💜💜💜
Hey, Danielle
I need the link to the 911 call, please. Thanks 🫶🏻
@@SaraAlmayahe😂 0:59
1:16 😂
@@AriatDesalegnBekele I am aware, but I wanted the full recording because there are other parts of it not included- such as the chest compression attempts
@@AriatDesalegnBekele I am aware, but I was trying to get the whole recording, because there are parts missing - such the chest compression imitations made by Clay
Obviously these "parents" didn't care about Lacey, but how on earth did they live in a house with rotting flesh smells, bodily fluids and maggots. The level of cruelty and neglect is beyond comprehension.
I don’t know how they lived with the smell to be honest, just trying to imagine it is making me feel sick to my stomach 🤢
A wonder how did they keep their clothes odor free. It amazes me that nobody noticed it...
Exactly how do you come home everyday from work and smell that and see their daughter they "cared so much for" right in front of them and them just keep living like nothing ever happened. Unbelievable!!
@@Rebecca_Bailey Was about to say the same about the smell. I was like no way y’all are able to survive the smell.
My thoughts exactly
I think the mom not knowing Lacy’s age is proof that she didn’t care about her at all😔
I hate that my brain goes this route but most likely, Lacey’s dad did something to Lacey and Shiela blamed Lacey for everything.
Why else would she refused Lacey to go to the hospital?? Because then, the doctors could have found evidence of other forms of abuse
Because her parents were pure evil
@@bellerain381that’s what I am thinking too.
For a child with her background to suddenly do a complete 180 and developed SEVERE social anxiety.. i just know something happened to her early on
One hundred percent. I was sexually abused by a family member when I was 5. Before, I was outgoing and chatty and bubbly. Afterwards? I literally stopped talking for the most part. I would only speak to my mom and brother. My brother literally spoke FOR me in public (restaurants, to ask where the bathroom was, etc) until I was 12. It took years for me to recover. I can't even imagine what poor Lacey went through 😢💔
Absolutely. Change in personality is a major warning sign of abuse.
THANK YOU! I have bad social anxiety but am on med for diagnosed severe general anxiety disorder. All are diagnosed and more. She went out using weights, it’s not social anxiety, it being scared of people because she can’t trust people. She started thinking everyone were like her parent. She had severe autism as a girl. Severe autism as a girl is SO different than boys autism. That was not social anxiety to me, that was being severely autistic with role models who made you even more scared of people.
They did something that made her completely anxious. And then they neglected her. Who knows what she went thru before
I think u r 100% right. My son is autistic & I've never heard of autism kicking in as they get older, it's usually the opposite
My mother lost her foot and was going through dementia. She was 300lbs and totally bedridden. I and my brother changed her MULTIPLE times a day until she passed.She never had so much as a rash. When the hospital received her corpse (she had a massive heart attack and died before help could come) they were shocked she didn't have a blemish. If two completely inexperienced young adults can manage that with such a large woman, Lacey should have been FAR easier to care for.
They left her to rot to death because they couldn't be bothered to care for their own CHILD. They couldn't even be bothered to get her help. How do you do that to another human being, let alone your own child?
100% agree. It's difficult, as you know well, to care for someone who is not mobile but this? I couldn't leave a total stranger in any kind of horror like this, let alone MY OWN CHILD?! Like you said, they could have at least put her in a home! Taken her somewhere that she would be taken care of. But they couldn't even bother to do that much for her. 😢
aw bless your heart, im glad you had the ability to care for your mother❤ i hope to be able to care for my mother in the future if she ever needs it
Agree 💯. My condolences 💐 on your mom. ❤
Lacey is not here to defend herself. Thats why they say it was her choice. High probability this woman was abused all her life.
and there are people here in this comment section defending that it was her choice and I am like... wow. These people exist. They are real. I can't even wrap my head around it.
Exactly , no one wakes up able to be this delusional neglectful and lacking empathy and a conscience . The parents have been that way before they had Lacey . They are dangerous . They couldn't see what the rest of the normal empathic outsiders could see ...... And their supporters ,... wow ..., how disgusting they found so much support,.... sickening .. ... where was Lacey's supporters in the community or church goers ???? . Thank goodness the DA went after them and didn't let them go ..
Also, why not get someone to at least care for her hygiene and nutrition if they were too busy or if it was too hard for them. Its such a weak excuse to say ‘she wanted this’
Exactly.. People don't cover themselves in their own poop like that for no reason.. She was probably trying to keep someone away from her
@@thewanderingtomato7674 That's disgusting, her choice? wtf
My son is autistic with Pathological Demand Avoidance and severe anxiety. He absolutely goes through periods where he can't leave his bedroom or maintain his hygiene. You know what I do during those times?
1.Anything I can to help him stay at least a little bit clean - wet wipes, warm bubbly water in a bucket to stim with, buying extra of his safe clothes so I can wash what's dirty and he can wear the clean versions....
2. Liaise with the professionals who are part of his care team regularly.
3. Support him to recover so we can get back to things being easier for him. Yes that often means low demands for PDA, but that doesn't mean ignoring him, it means finding creative ways to help him do what needs to be done.
4. Stay close by.
You know what I DON'T do? Leave my vulnerable child to literally rot for years.
*Editing to say I can't believe I've just opened TH-cam to so many notifications. Thank you everyone for your kind words, I didn't expect any response at all! My kid is awesome and honestly it's a privilege to be his Mum. For people saying PDA is new to them - I really recommend the PDA society website for helpful information. ❤️
You're a good mom or dad. Good job for doing that!!
Thisss. I also wonder if perhaps she had a seizure disorder that eventually affected her into not moving or something. I have a friend who was having seizures for years in her teens but had zero outward signs of it. She just got quiet and unmoving during them and often got in big trouble with parents and teachers, assunihg she was being rude and ignoribg them😭😭
Bless your heart mama/dad ❤
You're a very good parent, he's lucky to have you❤
This!💜 This is how you parent a child with your son's diagnosis. Thank you for sharing.
Lacey's parents could've done better. They chose not to. Can't imagine why. But it was a choice.
I'm amazed they actually called emergency services. The amount of abuse and neglect, I'm shocked they didn't try to hide the death.
I wonder why they did at all
That has always confused me.
@JCTheSniper15 Stop. You're implying that adults can't be abused or neglected, and that's not true, especially for vulnerable people. Any good parent would have their child forced into care instead of watching them suffer for YEARS on the couch.
@@JCTheSniper15 what you've just said really confuses me. An adult clearly suffering was LEFT to piss, shit, decompose, suffer for 15 YEARS?? Do you have how long a time that is? She was living under their roof, she was their responsibility from the moment she was no longer able to move. No one deserves to be left in those conditions - they prolonged her suffering by not stepping in. How is that not abuse ? They also prevented her from getting the treatment she needed - they specifically refused help from the doctors and then left her to rot?
@JCTheSniper15 being the age to be considered an adult, doesn't mean anything. Dr's clearly diagnosed her with SEVERE autism and social anxiety disorder. I don't care if she is 60 Years old, she was literally rotting away on a couch that her parents walked by every day, she was caked in feces, she had maggots in her ears , couch foam and feces in her stomach because her parents were not feeding her are you saying it's not the other adults responsibility to get her help simply because she was of adult age?
I do not believe for ONE SECOND any of this was Lacey's free will. They made her stay on that sofa and then she couldn't leave and then they stopped cleaning her and feeding her until she died. I am convinced they abused her before. A child doesn't develop social anxiety just like that, when she was described as brilliant, friendly kid before. They did this to her.
I honestly got this feeling as well!! I call it clipping a kids wings when parents do stuff like this, hindering their kids somehow someway.. I don't know why they'd do this to her but I'm with you.. they caused this!
Considering the changes started around puberty-- you know where i'm going with this.
Pulling her from school was a red flag imo
@rachelcarter9029 This was my first thought, especially when they said the parents decided to "home school" her.
@@InteriorDesignStudentexactly
As someone who struggles with social anxiety and agoraphobia I can concur that Lacey probably verbally said she didn't want to leave, but I know inside she was screaming. It's like being trapped inside an invisible cage of your own making.
HOWEVER.
I have a husband who loves me and when he sees the warning signs (not eating, not talking, no eye contact, won't move for hours on end) he gets my therapist involved asap and does everything he can to get me out of the house or even just opening all the doors and windows so I can have sunlight without having to leave my safe zone. When you love someone you don't let them rot.
Absolutely this. Sometimes I want to sit in my room and rot. My bf will say "you can rot, but you gotta do it out in the living room." And honestly just that change of space can be such an improvement. I don't have what lacey had. But just my personal depression and anxiety is enough. I can't imagine what that poor girl was fighting inside of her own head ❤
I went thru 4 years of severe germ and social anxiety which kept me home. I am thankful for the loving pushes of my family to continue with therapy and psychiatry by televisit and we made a plan and I went through very very slow exposure therapy to get me out of the house. First it was just opening the front door, then standing on the grass, then down to the mailbox... Now I am almost fully recovered and not only can I leave the house and be out in public but I can take my son too. My anxiety was also transferred to my son as I had a miscarriage before him and there was a pandemic and I was terrified of him leaving the house and dying. It is not something I ever imagined would happen to me, but I was absolutely terrified all the time... Even when other people left the house and I stayed home! I would still be stuck in the house 24/7. Had it not been for the loving support of my parents, my husband, my older daughter, the one friend who was willing to do whatever it took even if it meant having a " Play date" at totally opposite ends of the garden garden because I was too afraid to get close, And therapists and doctors. It really can take a team and it would have been really easy for my husband to have just left me. I can't imagine the hell that this young Lady endured. It was a little kindness, understanding and patience. Someone to pick her up and put her in a wheelchair and take her out to the front porch to watch birds. Getting home healthcare through disability services to help with bathing and wound education in order to prevent bed sores etc. It breaks my heart because this kind of thing can honestly happen to absolutely anyone. You can find yourself being a " normal" person who is totally capable of doing whatever to being someone who becomes a shut-in due to grief or someone who gets agoraphobia, has something traumatic happen to them and get PTSD, become bedridden with an injury or illness. We all have the potential to experience illnesses. It is definitely a humbling experience.
I'm the same, and my husband is just like yours. It's good to hear I'm not the only one. : )
For 12 years for this "Popular couple" they didn't have any visitors to their home?? That's hard to believe no one stopped by the house.
Not really, I’ve known lots of ppl like me who literally never have ppl over (in my case it’s cuz my house is too small, and there’s no room to seat more than 3 ppl). There’s lots of other reasons why ppl don’t invite others to their home, and it’s not that hard to avoid. When someone asks to hang out, you suggest a public place like a restaurant or a park. Usually when someone suggests to get together, they offer their house or a public place since inviting yourself over is taboo. I’m js I haven’t had a single guest in over 8yrs, so it’s not that hard to believe someone else out there is doing the same thing.
Nah, it's fairly common. My household was like that when I was growing up. Parents simply super private. Even now, I just don't like people in my space, our place is small. ✌️
This happened not far from where I live. The crazy thing is that they did! They would throw little get togethers. The parents would just close the door to the living room. I have no idea how no one smelled rotting flesh. The whole thing totally flips me out.
They had people over? That's insane! @@teriboudreaux6743
No, that's pretty believable. Being well-liked is not the same as having people come over.
as a caretaker even if lacey didn’t want want to move they easily could’ve cared for her that way, kept her clean, fed, etc. they’re absolutely vile
Exactly. Cater around the sofa was my first though. They just simply neglected her
Yep. Sponge baths, bringing her meals, even adult diapers and regular cleanings. Even if they didn’t want to do all of that, they had the money to put her in a nice care facility. There is no excuse.
Exactly as I nurse we have a lot of patients who refused to make a shower we still keep them clean and keep up to date with their hygiene no excuse even if she refused they should of forced her and did her hygiene for her and kept her clean.
I agree. They even could have asked for help or advice from others. I am sure there would have been someone willing to help or offer some form of advice. There is no excuse.
Lacey was showing textbook catatonia. Very common for ppl to think the person is choosing not to move,engage, withdrawn, incontinence, if left untreated they can be completely disconnected in all areas of functioning. What's even worse is they are cognitively aware but unable to do anything. When my autistic son was 12 he had severe catatonia and he went from someone who could talk,run,eat,use bathroom,to a 12 yr old infant who couldn't move,talk,eat,use bathroom, he had to be spoon feed, and diapered for 6 months before he recovered. These parents were lucky enough to have doctors recognizing the seriousness of her condition and they still did nothing ughhh
Well done mum 💖💖
That sounds terrible. How did you manage to get your son better after that?
@@rizkiramadhan9266he started treatment when he finally got to see an experienced phyc doc. The wait list was several months but as soon as doc started treatment (benzos, like Ativan, clozapine) he started to improve pretty quickly,thou some ppl have had to undergo several rounds of etc(electric shock therapy) to restart the brains ability to actively function. Ik etc sounds harsh but modern etc is done under sedation and heavily monitored during each session. My son is now 16,he's on medicine to decrease the chances of catatonia reoccurring but there's really no guarantee.
I'm curious too. How did he get out of the catatonia? Did you think it was permanent regression? How intriguing to me. ❤
@@CrystalCat24 I'm sorry I thought I responded to this but he was put on benzos ( meds like Ativan, clozapine, Xanax) it's amazing how it more less unlocks catatonia and u see the persons brain wake up. Thou rare some ppl require multiple ETC treatments (electric shock therapy, don't worry it's not the barbaric ETC u may be thinking of, modern ETC is done under sedation and heavily monitored during the treatments) to come out of it.
Yes there were times I wondered if he would ever recover. I knew with autism it's common to see regression during puberty but this was beyond anything I could've imagined. It had also triggered his tics to a level I had never seen B4 on anyone..clap clap squeeze poke for hours on end to being stuck like a statue. The best way I can describe it was sorta like when a toy is broken or has dying batteries. Being as he had it so severely he will always be at risk so his doc keeps him on a low dose of clozapine to decrease the risk but it's deff always in the back of my mind. He's now 16 and can use his voice to tell u all about how he completed his goal of using the microwave to make a burrito:)
I'm convinced all the lotion and clean clothes were staged before law enforcement got there. There is no way Lacey's mother was caring for her any time recently.
i think it's possible she had 1) cared for her in the past and just left everything there when she stopped or 2) it was actually supplies to clean with and keep the smell at a minimum
@@rachelcarter9029well considering that the smell was actually so bad that the coroner said it was the worst they’ve ever smelled, I highly doubt it was to keep it at a minimum
Absolutely. If they genuinely cared about her hygiene/health, she wouldn't have been rotting into the damn sofa.
I agree
I thought the same thing
As a CNA, there is absolutely no excuse for a person to be in this kind of physical condition. Not when there is bed baths, bed pans, etc. These parents simply did not care about their daughter whatsoever. They could’ve even hired a care giver if they did not want to do so themselves. So foul.
Exactly they could of hired a carer to look after her hygiene if they didn’t want to clean her up this could have been avoided what a sad case. Poor girl she had evil parents 😢
I read an article once that said Shelia hired a carer for her OWN mother,but they didn't do the same thing for their own daughter.
Rotten Mango also covered this one and she mentioned how the maggots on Lacey’s body were doing more help than her parents because maggots eat dead particles and were essentially removing the dead parts of Lacey’s body 🤯🤯
Wow!
with the dead parts gone. it prolonged her life from developing sepsis until it finally got her
I worked as a wound care nurse for a time, and I can tell you that the smell of rotting flesh is not easy to wash off. There were days when I got off shift that I would take multiple showers before I would go near another person. Taking that and the statement made by the coroner about the smell when he walked into the house, how the hell did the parents not reek when they walked out of that house?! I can understand that they probably stopped smelling everything, but how no one else could smell it on them amazes me!!!!
100%
THAT is an incredibly good point. Makes me think more people knew what was going on. Or that they wore Hazmat gear in the house..
Seriously how did neighbours not report the smell?
My thoughts exactly!!
maybe they thought it would be rude to tell a couple of middle-aged people they smelled like literal death? I've encountered some older folks who just seem to have an unfortunate smell despite being clean, so that would be my first thought.
I've waited on people before who have literally smelled like they were rotting/ just hadn't bathed or changed clothes for weeks/ months 😔 most of the time. It was just sad and awful but I always wondered how they just didn't realize...
"You've failed your child" is a complete understatement. My heart hurts for Miss Lacey
I can't imagine the kind of pain Lacey endured before she died. How anyone could just stand by and watch their own child rot like that is unfathomable to me.
This is so cruel so heartbreaking 😭😭
Even hard to believe how it is possible not to care for a daughter for a day let alone years and years..... And the pain she must have endured 😭😭 I cant and dont even want to imagine .... Why do some people have to suffer so much 😭😭😭
Honestly i appreciate how angry you get talking about this kind of stuff, it's the appropriate response. Most true crime content is.... a little less empathetic.
Sometimes, it might just be that the storyteller avoids anger. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't have empathy. Personally, I'm an extreme empath due to childhood trauma. The trauma also created a lot of anger. After so many years, I'm able to minimize that emotion. It doesn't mean that I condone bad behavior. It only means I don't want to suffer the effects of anger. I hope this makes sense. To be clear, I'm not saying Danielle is doing anything wrong. I'm a big fan of hers. She's very good at her job here. ❤
Agreed lol
In 2012, my life was in complete chaos. Along with me and my husband Fred, lived my son, his girlfriend, her 2 kids, and his 2 little boys on the weekends. I had a mental breakdown and didn't leave my bedroom for 5 months. My family was quite interfering with my self imposed exile. They wouldn't leave me be. After listening to this, I thank God they loved me enough to support and care for me.
I hope you’re doing so much better I’m glad you got support during this time after hearing this case
Im a hairstylist and me and my coworkers often work with extreamly matted hair. It's not uncommon to spend a full work day dematting someone's hair and salvaging as much length as possible. It happens a lot more than you'd think, depression, addiction, and physical illness can all cause some pretty severe matting. I cannot imagine the pain Lacy was in from her hair alone. I've seen mold, yeast infections, open sores, and tension alopecia all from 1-4 weeks of neglect. The idea that her hair was probably the least painful thing she was experiancing is just pure horror.
What strikes me is that they made that decision to not get her help every day. You can kill someone in a spur of a moment where the decision is made once and very quickly, but that's not what happened here. They decided so many times to not take action and so many times it took her closer to death.
Pretty sure they saw her rotting body EVERY SINGLE day and decided to not do a thing.
No sane person would even leave a stranger in that state, let alone their own flesh and blood family
I could have been Lacy if not for my parents. In my teens, I developed major depressive disorder and an anxiety disorder. After a few years, it progressed into full-blown agoraphobia. I didn't leave my home for a full year. My parents told me once it was easier to let me stay home where they knew I was safe and cared for. Yet, when they thought about me, fully as a person, it wasn't the life they wanted for me. They got me the right kind of help- therapy which included medication to break the excessive anxiety and I emerged on the other side of my disease. I remember those days being frozen in my mind and body filled with fear. I can't imagine enduring 15 years. If you would have asked me during my year indoors if I was happy I'd say yes just like Lacy supposedly said. Yes, but I was ill. This was in the 90's when mental health issues were more stigmatized. No one took medication or saw a psychologist. It wasn't talked about. My parents felt like they had somehow failed me. BUT THEY GOT ME THE HELP ANYWAY. It didn't matter what anyone else said about me or how they handled the situation. I feel these two needed to keep up appearances more than help their daughter. Imagine was everything. That woman could have led a full happy life if she got help. I hope those two rot.
You are blessed to have parents like you have ... I'm so happy for you as well ..
I really resonated with your comment, at around 20 years old i became a complete recluse after an abusive relationship.. I had diagnosed depression and anxiety and i guess the abuse caused a mental break. I didnt leave my house for a little over a year, rarely left my room let alone my bed. This also could of easily been me until my mother needed help with bills and i got a job. I have no idea how i was able to do it, I think i just really didnt want to burden my mother any more than i already was. Im glad youre better today and continue to thrive 💓
I’m an ER nurse- and you would be shocked how many times people come into the department in this condition- ALIVE. It’s more prevalent than you can imagine.
Whatttttttttttttttt....make a video please! Lol
That is so concerning and scary.
@@leahwalker192 probably not true.
@@asdfqwerty5389if they’re homeless it’s very true
@asdfqwerty5389 It absolutely is. Your limited experiences are not indicative of the experience of everyone else.
Grow up.
Lacy's parents didn't take her to get help because having a "less than perfect" child would look bad for their image. If they took her out of the house people would know about their daughter having autism and that didn't fit their image. Now them trying to uphold their perfect image has cost them everything and should they ever get out, the world already knows that they are monsters. Poor Lacy, you're free now without pain or neglect, all you feel is love 🙏🏽🕊❤
Part of the problem, I believe there was something else weird going on.
My theory…she was abused sexually by her “father” and so she became more withdrawn. Once her “mother” found out, she resented lacy and let her rot. They stopped getting her help once it was suggested she got to the hospital because they didn’t want rape evidence to show up.
Considering how common it actually is... could be
I think you're very likely onto something. Maybe not even rape evidence considering I'm sure after some time it was no longer available but possibly they feared Lacey speaking out. It would make sense why she didn't do it in her own bedroom but in an open room with little to no privacy.
as a disabled autistic woman the first time I heard a deep dive about this case it quite literally sent me into a downward spiral of existential panic
Same here, it's so depressing..
i hope your families care more than this poor girl 😢 certainly try to speak up if necessary. i can tell how angry Danielle is!
I hope you have people who care for you, if not please reach out for help. I know it won't help much to assuage your anxiety but this poor victim had horrible people around her. I will pray for you and hope you have good people. You, nor anyone, deserves treatment like this. There are people who care.
If ever you feel neglected or that you need help, please please please say something to anyone. 🙏 People care. If one person doesn't help, keep reaching out to others. When vulnerable people need help, even strangers will step up to help. As you can see by Danielle's reaction. Her emotions about this case are not unique. ❤
I'm so sorry
I dont understand how one time over the FIFTEEN YEARS of Lacey sitting on that couch that neither of her parents had a come to jesus moment and did something to help her. I feel bad if I accidentally sleep in and don't feed my cat on time, knowing that she is dependent on me and she went hungry even for an hour makes me feel horrible. How could you watch your daughter slowly die over 15 years....
I know!!! I wash my dog on a “schedule “ and if I’m a couple days over I’m like half panicking. I get up Monday-Friday on a schedule and I like to sleep in on Saturday and I still wake to feed my dog and let her out so I technically don’t even “sleep in”
Yeahits not easy to understand, the scene of her in her own filth , how did they look at that and be ok with it ? The smell ffs . they got used to the smelll of their daughter literally rotting to death
I’m with you on this. I have fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis in both knees and 5 slipped discs. Pain gets BAD.
But I also have a dog and a cat who didn’t ask to come into my life. So I go to work to afford food for them. I buy them food and treats. I bring the dog, a chiweenie, outside. And I empty the kitty litter. Because they deserve that care and then some.
And I did the same for my kids before they left the nest.
👋👋👋🙏🙏🙏 This neber ever happens again!!!😥
But also what about the doctors? They say Lacey needed to be committed. She was refusing to eat, use a toilet or leave the sofa and the house. Her parents clearly couldn’t care for her, and by refusing to have her committed obviously couldn’t make decisions in Lacey’s best interests.
Did they not follow up? Did they not refer her to other people/services that could go over the parents’ heads if need be. Lacey was failed so badly by people who were supposed to care for her, poor woman.
How much HATE does it take to do that to your own child? Your own child with a disability. For 12 years!The profound abilism, prejudice and ignorance towards neurodiversity, cruelty and an enormous amount fo sadism...
The audacity to say the loved her.
This
YES THISS 🙌🏽
@meladeekunkel5880 That isn't love. The mother doesn't even remember her age.
"They loved her to death. They loved her to a fault." This is beyond comprehension. Unbelievable. I should have put the quotes in my previous comment. I'm saying the exact wording from my previous comment. I also think my comment wasn't fully read and was misunderstood.
No, that's not love. I never said that. I was NOT defending the parents nor excusing their heinous actions against their daughter. That appalling statement was said by the attorney for the parents. I was repeating that statement because it was unfathomable. I was trying to make a point of how he or anyone could defend these evil parents and how disgusting that they allowed it to happen to their daughter. Good grief.
My older brother has one of the more severe forms of autism and my mother knew that she wasn't equipped to take care of him, though she did try, so what did she do? She put him in a home. The home has been taking care of him for 30 plus years, and he's actually doing very well.They send frequent updates on his progression, and he can actually say a couple of words now. Some people may judge parents for putting children in a home.But I think it's a lot better and more responsible to do that rather than neglecting them.
This is exactly what I was thinking about. I work as a behavior support aide for children with disabilities. I know Parents get concerned when their kids get old enough to graduate school, but there is no shame in putting them into a home or adult daycare if you don't have the resources. This girl could have THRIVED in a home with people who were trained to take care of her.
How do you live in your home and walk by your sofa seeing your child like this? Decorating the tree?! Wouldn’t the smell get to you? The things good parents would do for their children. These people are the worst of the worst.
Honestly. You’d be surprised at how many parents are embarrassed to have a child with disabilities. It’s cruel and sad.
It takes MINIMAL care to keep someone in decent care. Even if she chose to not get up, they couldve wash her, fed her, clipped nails, etc. Blaming their neglect on their child is wild.
I can tell you as someone who worked in a home for people with severe disabilities, no, it is NOT easy to change and move someone, esp an adult. We had mechanical lifts to be able to move them to change their diapers and change their clothes. It usually took at least two of the male staff members to get them moved and repositioned. I am not excusing what the parents did, they could have gotten her in to one of these places, obviously they exist, but no, it is NOT easy to care for an immobile adult.
@@HeatherE303 but at the same time. If you clipped her nails ones a month, they wouldnt be extremely long. And if you cut her hair and brushed it once a week, it wouldnt be a 20x20 matted ball. Etc. She would still get sick and she would get soars etc. But at least you wouldve tried. They didnt even try...
@@HeatherE303They didn't say it was easy. They said it takes minimal care.
A.K.A. A washdown every week, brushing her hair once a week, giving her gruel or water through a straw
IDFK. Something. Anything. But no one said it would be easy. But that's minimal care.
This case has haunted me since I heard about it. What Lacey went through was inhumane. I'm 31 now, but when I was in my early 20s, I struggled with agoraphobia. Sometimes I didn't want to leave my room. My parents were understanding, but constantly checked on me to make sure I was okay and if I needed anything. Eventually, they got me out and about comfortably. There is ZERO excuse for what her parents did, or what they claim happened. That poor woman... May Lacey rest in eternal peace. 🕊
i had agoraphobia for 10yrs. I still struggle, but no where near what I went thru. Congrats on beating yours!❤
@@lilmisskiss692003 Thank you! I still struggle as well, especially now living with chronic illness. Congrats on your progress! That's something to be so proud of. ♥
I’ve had agoraphobia for 27 years, I’m so glad you were able to fight it. It can be very isolating, and it’s always reassuring in a way to see someone else talk about it and know you’re not alone.
i’ve had agoraphobia for about 10 years now, my mother was (and is still when it acts up, luckily mine is mostly sort of dormant{?}) incredibly supportive and was always gentle when pushing me to try to push the boundaries and there for me if it didn’t work out well. i can not even fathom my own mother behaving like lacey’s parents
I'm so glad to hear you are doing well. My mom was my salvation for me in my situation. Poor Lacey deserved so much more
From Baker here. My family has known thier family for decades. We were FLOORED.
Okay I’ll ask: didn’t your family SMELL it on their family? Didn’t anyone go into the house? How did those vile people fool your family for so long? And what have you all learned? Wow.
@@laurazielinski2437 no, strangely enough. Nobody thought anything was going on. They also kept thier distance though. Nobody went to thier house ever. They didn't leave much either. Just the kind of people you recognize at the store and catch up with at check out and then you dont see for a few more years. Its really eerie.
Hell really is empty and all the devils are here.
Danielle is the only true crime TH-camr who doesn’t sensor any words. Tells the story how it is. I appreciate that so much! Thank you, Danielle. 😊❤
Umm yeah well that can affect her videos. Which means she won’t get paid so she has to be careful what she says and it’s not like she swears
Re: her shirt exposing her chest. A news report I watched said her dad had tried to pull a shirt on her I think while the authorities were on their way. He was trying to make it look slightly better than it was, but he couldn’t get it on her. So that’s why it was only half on.
Fancy seeing you here!
The absolutely ridiculous idea that her having a t-shirt on makes the situation look better just does my head in! You know they were scrambling because they knew they were royally screwed! Xx
That's what I was thinking.
I-that just kinda makes this worse? It means they left this poor woman naked half/all the time! 🤢
That's what I thought. Holy shit, I hope this is the worst thing I ever hear!
If that house smelled so bad, how did the parents not smell when they went out? How could everyone around them not notice and think something was wrong??
Trust me, people can smell when you’re a smoker. They can smell it if you don’t clean your litter box. How did they not smell like sewage and death?
@@tiffaniecross2209 I'm a taxi driver and people smell of the restaurant they've been in for a few hrs when they get in my car. I can usually smell if people have cats or dogs and most drinkers have a sickly sweet smell. I can't believe these people didn't honk to high heaven either!
If her mental age was that of a child, then why did they did they let her make the decisions. I would not let a 10 year old decide what to do.
What does "mental age" mean? She was a legal adult.
@@JCTheSniper15bro just stop. It’s getting pathetic.
@@WolfDreamer101 what's pathic is calling people evil criminals because they didn't deal with a crazy person the way you imagine a crazy person should be dealt with.
@@JCTheSniper15who's crazy??
@@JCTheSniper15right so you are a child then it makes total sense now
It feels like the parents were embarrassed by her & her diagnosis, so they pulled her out of society.
This case hits me hard. Lacey is a lot like me in many ways, and while I can't speak to her parents' motivations, I can speak to my own parents'. My story started out a lot like Lacy, except my parents refused to let me get diagnosed with autism. My parents had tried so hard to have a baby, and they resented the fact that they finally had one, and it was "defective".
They did go about it differently though. Once I was a legal adult, I got myself an autism diagnosis. The doctor sat down with my parents and told them I wouldn't be able to take care of myself without years of occupational therapy. My mother said, and I quote, "f*ck that" and threw me out of the house two days later. I was 19, and I was homeless for over a year. I've managed to claw myself to where I am now, at 28 (well, I will be 28 in a few weeks), and my parents insist they did the right thing and the doctor was clearly wrong because I'm still alive, as if they didn't put me in a situation where my only options were literally to either learn very fast or die. I'm alive, but I'm barely functional. Though they frequently still berate me because I'm not as far in life as my peers, despite the fact that I'm already playing the Game of Life in Hard Mode and them figuratively kicking my legs out from under me on top of that. They say I owe them because in the last couple years, they've given me some money when I was sick (I had COVID once, and then bronchitis multiple times) and missed a few weeks of work and couldn't make my rent on my apartment. But frankly, I think they're lucky I still speak to them at this point.
Oh, and also my mother has admitted to my younger sister that she planned to drown me in the bathtub when I was little because I was "difficult" (aka, I had undiagnosed autism)
But yeah. This case hits me hard, but it doesn't surprise me much. One of the most common causes of death in autistic children is their own parents. Lacy was an adult when she finally died, but I think her slow death started long, long ago.
I'm very sorry to hear that happened to you. Wishing you all the best for the future. Take care.
Your parents need to be arrested
You are so resilient! I’m sorry to hear that you didn’t get the right kind of help, but kudos to you for doing everything you can for yourself. You communicate very clearly and intelligently in your writing, which is a wonderful skill to have. You will continue to do well, despite the lack of love and care from your family. Keep it up. You are worthy.
@@viviannichols3582 She indeed is incredibly strong. I cannot begin to fathom what it must feel like or how one would cope. The fact that she continues to communicate with them is astonishing. I truly hope she has found happiness, and I wish her nothing but the very best for the future.
(Happy Birthday)
As a registered nurse, I've seen patients in very similar situations, still alive, end up in the hospital to die from septic shock. It's heartbreaking.
This case breaks my heart, she deserved so much better. I don't understand how her parents could do this to her.. the levels of neglect is beyond.
I have to say, that argument that “It was Lacey’s decision. She’s an adult.” That’s BS. She has severe autism. Making her disabled. Hence all decisions fall back to her parents.
Her parents who couldn’t be bothered.
My daughter is an only child. Autistic. Low IQ. Name starts with an L and is two syllables like Lacey. This story hit so close to home. I watched this video yesterday and had my daughter sleep in bed with me last night because of how much this case rattled me. No one deserves the treatment Lacey received, but ESPECIALLY one with special needs. My heart is absolutely broken.
hearing that feces and sofa foam was found in her stomach was very upsetting, i can’t imagine being in a situation where that’s all i have to eat. so heartbreaking
as an autistic person with self-isolating tendencies, this hit so hard, I've had moments like this where I would not want to leave my bed or couch for weeks and the only way I was able to get out of it was because of my friends and family.
If i can offer some unsolicited advice...You may consider finding a check-in buddy. You don't have to be social about it, just a text daily or every few days to say "checking in safe today" so if suddenly you stop doing it, someone will know to call or come by. I'm a single mom and the only adult in my home, and one of my biggest fears is that something could happen to me and no one would know my child is here with no one to take care of her. I do a daily check with my mom, who also lives alone and tends to self-isolate and i worry about what if she has a stroke or something. It gives my mom and I both a sense of safety that we know each other are okay or at least know when to worry, even if we're not feeling social and arent trying to chat really.
@@tinygreenpeaYou’re right. I am autistic and tend to self-isolate. I obsess over certain solo activities so I’m not laying in bed, but I have a neighbor who checks in with me 3-4 times a day from 8am to 10pm. She uses tough love to make me get out of the house for an hour here or just ride with her to her boutique. She’s going through a hellish divorce from a malignant narcissist but she still finds the care to check in on me. I’m lucky to have her.
I’m autistic myself and I can relate. I’ve had times where I felt so depressed that I would isolate myself from the family and I would stay in a dark room. Luckily I haven’t done that in months. Thankfully I’m doing so much better now.
I have a theory that at one point one of the parents physically assaulted her and she was too brain damaged to move. I think that explains why they didn't send her to the hospital. They didn't want people to find out that they abused her and then neglected her. No way she had a say in this.
Also crazy they called HER lazy when they couldnt even care for their daughter in this situation
Either that or they didn't want Lacey to tell medical staff about other horrific abuse. The fact that she suddenly changed drastically in young adolescence points to something pretty terrible.
I've been deep diving into this case and researching what I can and this is pretty much the theory (physical abuse either from someone else or the parents) I've come to as well. Something happened to cause that massive shift in personality and sudden profound autism diagnosis. I'm autistic too as well as a parent and I cannot wrap my head around it. ALSO if they truly loved Lacey, they would've told the whole truth about what happened. All interviews and reports I've found is the parents giving excuses and lies to protect themselves.
@xchrononautx I completely agree. I think this case is a pretty good albeit extreme showcase of how people misunderstand autism and how that can be dangerous. I'm autistic and a parent as well, my brother is autistic as well as my father. With sensory issues and other things, there is just no way I see an autistic person being okay with existing this way. I mean, nobody would be okay with existing like this, and I understand hygiene and sensory issues are different for different for different people on the spectrum, but it just doesn't track as she was not this way before. Even if it was just her "choice" to live like this (not buying that at all), if the parents really gave a crap they would have bathed her or moved her once in a while or maybe got a new couch. Called a doctor. Not HID her. I think their actions say it all tbh. Had they just brought her to the hospital in the first place they might have actually gotten away with it. Sad and it also makes me wonder how much of her "personality change" wasn't actually autism at all but just the result of trauma.
@@hailylazore2021 absolutely agree with you. I don't think there's any other documented case where a sudden change like that is diagnosed as profound autism unless Lacey had been masking for such a long time that she eventually mentally broke?
I’m so shocked she didn’t die of sepsis years prior…she must have been in so much pain 😭
My son has autism, and it breaks my heart anytime I hear someone taking advantage of the disability, and victimizing these people. Especially parents who should be the ones sticking up for them. My heart just breaks..
I'm glad your son has someone who feels this way. My mother thought since she was physically disabled that my autism didn't matter and she never got me any help and now I am a very very fed adult
@aidanangalia8868 I am so sorry to hear that. As a parent it hurts. I work hard to make sure my son is cared for, and feels safe. I am not perfect by far, but I knew when I decided to start a family that my child could be aflicted with all sorts of things that would make their life challenging. I told myself I would always do my best to care for them accordingly, and know I am lucky to have them in my life.
I have noticed that most parents who fall short in those areas are often struggling mentally themselves. I had some of the difficulties my son has when I was growing up, and my mother was really mean to me. She is a pretty big Narcissist, and suffered abuse of her own. That does not make any of it in any way right, but maybe your mother had similar mental issues. Either way I hope you know that you have value as human being, and your life has a purpose. ❤️
Yes! My son has autism as well. I will never understand people like this. It is absolutely gut wrenching and maddening!
I wonder if they got financial help from the government for her… and used it for the complete opposite.
I’m a parent of an adult with autism & I have fought for my son his entire life and got him as much therapy and assistance as I could possibly give him. And I’m so proud of him. I also can’t imagine doing this to a child. How can anyone be so cruel.
I’ve heard this case several times, but nobody else really conveyed how truly horrific what happened to poor Lacey was. When it comes to true crime, and dead bodies in general, I have a strong stomach but the way you told it, I felt nauseous. It’s so awful. But thank you for telling it. You’re not clinical, or dismissive or …. I don’t know how to put it but you’re DIFFERENT. It’s so clear that you care. Deeply. And it makes me care more. And i know that’s a weird thing to thank you for, but sometimes I get really jaded, but the way you tell her story, your caring, even your anger help restore my faith in people. So, thanks for being you.
That poor girl’s parents cared more about their image than they did their own daughter’s life!!! Disgusting!!!
Honestly, it shouldn't be so easy to pull children out of school. Parents should have to provide evidence their kids were either transferred to another school or are actively being homeschooled which, in that case, should be actively monitored for the safety and education of the child
You are 100% right, homeschool kids are left alone, CPS should do regular controls on them, considering the long list of abuse cases that start with the child being pull out of school and isolated.
Homeschooled children are on average, MUCH safer at homeschool than they are in public school. My daughters school has multiple security guards at each entrance, at least 2 police on campus at all times, and still has at least a couple violent fights a month and wide spread drug use. The last thing ANYONE needs is more government intervention into private citizens lives...or didn’t the government response to covid enlighten you to that fact?
Nobody caught that she had neuro and developmental disabilities until she was 14. In Louisiana, private school teachers are not required to be certified. That means unlike a public school, they are not always mandatory reporters.
@@michelledml3162 I respect parents rights to homeschool children but I've heard too many CA cases of neglectful/abusive parents pulling their children out of school before tragedy happened. If you aren't harming your children it should be no issue to comply with laws designed to protect minors but, I also respect your perspective. There has to be some sort of middle ground
@@kageyama1083Plus 90% of parents don’t have the organization/discipline/intelligence to homeschool effectively. Unfortunately many parents love to say otherwise, but it’s the truth. There’s a reason why teachers have to go to school for years to become a teacher.
This is so horrific… a note on maggots though… some species only eat rotting flesh and are used in many countries to clean festering wounds. The maggots probably kept her alive a lot longer than she would’ve survived by preventing severe infections for so long. It’s so horrific what she went through and that her parents could obviously see the maggots on her and not fucking do a thing. As a mom of four- one with OCD and autism- I just can’t imagine giving up on her. It’s well beyond heartbreaking… this is goddamn infuriating.
It is truly horrific. Like a horrible scene in a horror movie. How coouod they look at that and prestend it was alirght ?
it’s not just that she fused with the couch, she did, but...i saw some early photos and half of her body was IN the couch. if you see the couch pic, that’s only where half her body would be if you really look. the other half was inside the couch…just…gosh
your points are very interesting. i didn’t know about the maggots that can keep people alive.
lacey’s case truly broke my heart. i’ll never forget her. 🤍🕊️🤍
I thought the same.may have helped with the nerves also. Bless you good momma, ✌🤟
I bet the parents never really went into that room at all. How did they avoid the horrible sewer smell every day?
When you have a bag of trash that is sitting around for a couple days it stinks to high heavens.
Who could live in a house like that? Their clothes don’t start to smell like the house? 😮
@@JennM-ty7je she was in the living room… and Danielle spoke of times they put up Christmas trees a few feet away from Lacy, posting photos on the internet to prove it. They were in there at least some of the time.
Personally, I think they definitely saw her and just acted as if she didn’t exist. After 10+ years, they learned to ignore her, even the odor. Smells basically disappear to your brain after a while (it’s why you can almost never tell if you, yourself, have bad breath unless you really try… your brain becomes numb to it, so to speak).
Im sure you’re definitely right about the folks smelling funny though… but maybe they were good at masking it or keeping at arms length from others so it wasn’t as noticeable? That one definitely makes me curious too.
My grandmother had a stroke. The doctors said it was likely she could get most of her quality of life back with physical therapy. She didn't want to do physical therapy and would cry. My grandfather couldn't bear to see her cry so no physical therapy. She didn't get any better.
Family members fought to get her placed into facilities where she could get proper care. She would cry and my grandfather would take her home. She did have trouble with bed sores. She did get infections.
Every visit with them was a battle because she wanted to be at home and he refused to upset her. But he was simply too old to take proper care of her. It took a toll on his health, too. Eventually, he died of a heart attack and she died in her sleep a week later.
Their lives could have been so much better if he had just found the courage to tell her no. If she had gone to therapy she could have walked and talked again. If she had stayed in a care facility she would have likely improved enough that living at home wouldn't have been an issue. But things went downhill because he couldn't find the courage to make her do things she didn't want to do.
I'm glad my grandparent's situation didn't get this bad, but given more time I'm sure it would have gotten worse. If you love someone be willing to upset them when it's a necessity. Sometimes you have to choose their life over their wishes.
I agree. It's called "tough love" and it needs to happen sometimes for a person to improve and get better. Being an enabler to someone does far more damage than pushing someone in the right direction.
I kind of thought through a similar scenario as this listening to this story. Early on it sounds as if they were in denial of how serious her condition was. They probably thought and hoped it was a phase that would pass. I bet early on her mom did do the things she said she did to take care of her daughter, but I imagine eventually that's taxing on the caregivers too. It's not an excuse, just a possibly scenario I see. They still had the opportunity when they become overwhelmed to seek further assistance and they chose not to. It's so sad to think of where Lacey's mind must have been for 12 years. Did she stop at 24 and lock in to the past or was fully engaged in her surroundings watching life pass her by or was she entranced and in her mind living in a Disney movie, probably feeling like Sleeping Beauty waiting on her prince to come wake her. She was a beautiful girl with such a bright smile. So sad to think of how her life was spent.
The parents failed this poor girl at every level. There is a dark corner of hell reserved for them.
The Google street view was really eerie and it made me think...you literally never know what's happening behind closed doors or in any of the homes you might pass by every day.
Shanda Vander Ark is a perfect example of that. It blows my mind 🙀
That's deep!
This may be the worst case I've ever heard on my entire life.
What an excuse of "parents", they are so disgusting I literally have no words.
It is!!
Ugh god this situation absolutely infuriates me. The simple disregard for human life when all Lacey's parents could have done was call someone to take her. They'd be lousy parents for never bothering to visit her in care but for god's sake she deserved at least that. My mom has MS and has been bedridden for years and has nurses come out to give her care daily as well as family to help her. I couldnt fucking imagine subjecting my mother to that, and these two just let this poor woman suffer.
I have MS. Hope my children are as kind as you when my disability progresses. They are already very helpful. God bless you and your Mom. You are both in my prayers.
I have a STRONG stomach. Never once in all the time I have watched true crime content, have I ever debated on skipping ahead or waiting to finish the video until after I finish my dinner... This case is... on a whole other level. I am disgusted, horrified and enraged. Thank you, Danielle, for handling this case with the same delicate grace as you always do, while also sharing every detail. I appreciate the attention you give to these cases, even the one that made my skin crawl
i'm from and live in louisiana, been watching your vids for years. just wanna say great coverage and sensitivity of this story, you really know your stuff and do THE MOST when it comes to deep dives. i remember when this happened in my area and tons of people were absolutely shocked. anyway, thank you dani for your factual attention to detail and respect to this case.
Danielle's anger at this family and the people around that didn't care is absolutely palpable. As someone that grew up in abuse that everyone knew about and everyone ignored, its cathartic. Reminds me that there are normal, empathetic, caring people out there. Its cathertic in a way. Thank you for sharing with us, and caring so much about these victims. You spread awareness. ❤
I once read this case and it blows my mind that nobody could smell it on the parents!!
They must have stunk.
Maybe because they were big shots in town no one said anything???? I wondered the same thing
That's what I'm wondering how the smell didn't stick to their clothing...
This case haunts me. Hearing about Lacey makes me think of my own son. Autism, low IQ, interests are a bit young for him. If one day he stopped being the kid who chases the dog around the house, rides his bike, and loves bowling, I would stop at nothing to help him feel like himself again.
I have known for a long time I will always have to care for him in some way and I'll do that til I am gone. I canNOT imagine my baby rotting into a couch bc I failed him so horribly. Despicable.
I cannot comprehend how parents are able to do this. We're supposed to care and protect our kids. It's beyond disturbing when parents can harm and cause their children's death.
Danielle you nailed this case, I've been waiting for more information forever... You've given the most information available... And your reaction is so valid. Tbh sometimes I find you to overreact to cases if they have been overly covered... I can't speak I cry at everything.. But wow... You're the 1st you tuber I follow to share new and valid information and emotion. Thanks for this info and your honest angry sarcastic story was exactly how I felt watching.
Wow this hits hard, I can't stop crying for Lacy. I'm a 36 year old woman with autism, adhd, severe anxiety and agoraphobia. It sounds like she may have developed agoraphobia, but sadly, we will never know. So, when you say, she was aware of everything right up to her death I really hope that wasn't the case. I will never know Lacy as a person, but I know myself, and in times of severe mental health crises I have "escaped" into my own mind before. Maybe it's a defense mechanism to cope, but I've escaped so far into my own mind that I couldn't feel the pain of hunger or being tired anymore. Maybe her last days on earth were spent in her mind in a Disney movie, maybe she was a Disney princess, again we won't know because the people around her didn't try to get her help. And she wasn't in her room, she fled to the couch in a time of need, which is something I often did as a kid when I was sick or upset. I stayed out on the couch instead of my room so my parents could help me. I wish Lacy's parents had helped her.
On the maggots, they'll only eat dead flesh. They won't eat live flesh. I think they're sometimes actually used in some medical fields to keep a wound clean and remove the dead flesh. So it's probably reasonable to say that the maggots kept her alive longer than she should have been.
Frankly the treatment of this girl is horrific and disgusting. It honestly astounds me that someone could not only do that to another person, but their own relative, their own child. How they could just go about their own lives, walking past her multiple times a day. It's a whole other level of avoidance
Did you see there was a similar thing that happened where a woman here in the USA that refused to get off the toilet. Her BF left her there for two years. He brought her food, he’d sit on the tub to chat with her, but left her there. A crew had to physically remove her from the toilet and she had fused to the toilet seat
Really sad. But at least he actually got her help eventually
How about you call an ambulance and tell them she won’t get off the toilet? Sorry I just don’t see the honesty in that situation. How did she sleep like that?
I remember that case
@@JennM-ty7jeYeah, I would maybe let it slide for like a day, then take action to get them off the toilet. This is insane.
I was immediately thinking of that case when I started watching this. I believe she was grossly obese and couldn’t get up from the toilet. So boyfriend couldn’t move her and they both just went on with life such as it was.
I just know that her parents were ableists who thought, well she was just fine before, so she’s faking this and choosing to be “lazy”, let’s let her deal with the “natural” consequences until she “chooses” to change. I just KNOW that’s how they felt. Disgusting. Poor girl just needed support.
And thats why she says she’s an adult. In her mind, because she’s such an ableist, she thinks Layce chose this for herself.
and they used the "well what can we do? she's an adult", even if your kid is an adult if they're literally rotting right in front of your eyes, you do something to help
That would explain why everything seem to go downhill as soon as she got the autism diagnosis
Yes omg. Its baffling to my mind but you made it make some sense and its still just baffling tbh. Jfc. Taking the this is the consequences of your own actions to an extreme. Omfg.
If you are mentally or physically disabled even with being an adult you have limitations you need help with. I have physical disabilities and get help when I'm able to. Autism and cognitive issues reduces your mental age. Her physical age is 36 but mental age around mid teens. Lacey's parents wouldn't have understood this with saying she's an adult
I wish we could know what happened to this poor woman. I have a daughter with autism and I couldn't imagine not wanting to give her plenty of opportunities to have a great life.
i cannot comprehend why they would refuse hospitalization… like they clearly did not care at all about this poor girl and if they were capable of this absolutely insane level of neglect you’d think they would jump at the chance to “get rid of her”in a way by having her institutionalized
typically i would never condone parents shipping off their children to avoid actually parenting them, but in this case the best thing for lacey would’ve been to be completely removed from these awful excuses for parents, no matter how upsetting it might’ve been at first
Her autopsy photo and report are absolutely heartbreaking. As a mother, I can't imagine.
The image of her on the autopsy table is awful, she was soooo thin
Where can you find the photos?
@@christinegraytruecrimeshe looked like a doll, I mean she looked so thin and emaciated that my brain can’t comprehend an actual person looking like she did.
Her parents are monsters. WHO would do this???
The defines the saying “you never know what happens behind closed doors”
My thoughts exactly.
Omg yes!
Fr
Smiling in the Christmas Tree photo while Lacey is in the room is so disturbing.
You know what you do if your child refuses to leave the couch, including to meet their bodily needs? Call an ambulance and have them committed to a psychiatric ward so they can get the help they need -- whether they want to go or not.
I think there is something WAY more sinister going on than what theyre claiming. It goes above and beyond neglect. The parents had to have seen her melting into the couch, especially if they're bringing her food every day. They had to have smelled her, seen the bed sores, the urine burns, her muscles atrophying (so she couldnt move even if she wanted to). They HAD to have been getting some weird sadistic gratification out of watching her in that state. I wouldn't be surprised if they initially restrained her, and then after months or years of being restrained, unable to move, and half starved, they removed the restraints (or maybe they melted away, if they used rope) because she couldn't move anyway.
this case has absolutely haunted me to my core, it has since i heard about it. i just want to give her a hug and tell her i’m sorry. i can’t grasp how someone can do this to a person to someone they claimed they loved
Its truly incomprehensible And if these people were so popular did anyone wonder about their daughter? Is even stranger
As someone who grew up in Louisiana, a big part of the culture is one of polite privacy. As gossipy as it can get, people rarely pry very deep because it is considered impolite. On top of that, there still exist stigmas against mental health in the Deep South that leads to a lack of understanding and treatment. None of this is an excuse, but might bring some understanding to some of the aspects of the case.
as a southerner who also has autism... this is where I'd like to point out the difference between manners and kindness. they overlap, but when your manners no longer keep to kindness... seems to me that's really just classism prettied up, isn't it?
the older I get, the less use I have for manners and the more I appreciate kindness.
@@nivisionfor sure
I get it but I wouldn’t give a shít what anyone said. I would help my kid. But I get it. Her standing in the community as well.
I live in Louisiana as well but to me it seems pretty normal to not ask neighbors where their adult/almost adult children are, unless you're close to them. I live in an apartment complex and have no idea what my neighbors, much less their family, are doing.
I think you do a disservice to folk of the Deep South to even suggest that there is even a sliver of understanding of the abusive and cruel behaviours of these monsters.
Parents who refuse to treat their autistic children as human beings deserve an extra special place in hell. As an autistic/otherwise disabled person myself, this situation is absolutely horrifying.
I am always thankful for my mum but this just makes me so grateful that she is not neglectful of me. I’m 25 and whilst I can still do some things, outside of my home I need a wheelchair or mobility aids, I need her to take me to my appointments and speak for me etc. I can’t work because of my autism plus other health conditions making my day to day life unpredictable and painful. my autism isn’t extremely high support needs but I do have moderate support needs. I have mental health problems including cptsd from childhood abuse from my father, and need support for that. I cannot imagine the horror of having a parent treat you like that, and that’s coming from someone who was abused by their parent. This goes beyond abuse. There isn’t even a word for it. I hope Lacey is in a better place and I hope her parents rot themselves.
I also sleep on a sofa due to GERD that makes me asphyxiate on acid during the night if I lay anywhere near flat, and my sleep is not restful at all. It makes my pain worse. I’ve been sleeping on it for over 4 years and i can’t describe how sleeping on it makes me feel exhausted even when I’ve just woken up. There definitely NO WAY that woman slept next to her daughter every night.
It's kind of weird in the U.S. because a lot of college-aged students leave home and don't go back for many reasons. I know a few people who are estranged from their families. So, it's really not odd for the neighbors to not question it, depending on what the parents tell everyone. But it's sad for Lacey, for sure.
I don't even believe that her parents ever loved Lacey.
I believe that, given their "status" and reputations, they were trying to give off the "Ideal American Family" image, but didn't genuinely care about actually getting Lacey the help she clearly needed.
It seems eventually her parents thought it would be easiest to basically leave her and forget about her, erasing her from their lives.
Her mother posting on FB about how their lives were going while not even acknowledging Lacey is absolutely unacceptable.
I understand that having someone with disabilities, physical and/or mental, can make taking care of someone very difficult.
But a family or loved ones who genuinely love the person, will do anything and everything in their power to help the person and give then their best life.
These monsters clearly did not give a DAMN about Lacey.
They don't deserve the oxygen to keep them alive.
They could have called nurses and care givers to help.
But no.
They denied even the most basic help.
Even for people who hate their child htf were they not affected by the literal sight and smell of it .its bizarre
I feel like the parents should at least be charged and convicted of criminal negligence and manslaughter. They may not have wanted to kill her, but they let her suffer and die anyways when they had a lot of time to intervene and get her the medical attention she desperately needed
As a severely disabled woman, I'm so very grateful for my daughter and carers. She will never let me go to a retirement home for similar reasons.
I cannot imagine allowing another human being to suffer in such a way. Breaks my heart.
Thank you Danielle, for putting your heart out there with each and every story you tell. ❤
You are blessed.💜
I'm in recovery from a cardiac arrest and episodes of intestinal infections (ugh) so I'm staying with my daughter and her husband. It's frustrating to not be able to do things like before but it's beautiful to have family who'll treat us with respect and care. Thanks for sharing! Take care 😊
Cases like this get me especially badly, any involving disability. I'm disabled, and I'm SO lucky to have people who support me and care about me, but many don't. Disabled people are seen as "vulnerable" for many reasons, and they're more likely to face abuse and neglect than those without disabilities.
I'm surprised they even called it in. Why give 40 if half of it is suspended??! Why did they get to continue to be out on bail. Absolutely disgusting miscarriage of justice.
Ive been waiting for someone to do a deep dive on this case!!! This story blows my mind its so tragic its stuck with me since Lacy was found
Rotten Mango has a video on this case too
I've been hoping for someone to do a respectful deep dive on this case, and you're one of the most respectful true crime content creators I know.
I have autism, and I thank my lucky stars every single day that I have such a great family and support-system. It breaks my heart when hearing about how some of my autistic brothers and sisters are being treated 💔💔💔
I lost a partner to sepsis and its quick.....not long that i know of.
It was a friday a doctor came out gave him antibiotics and said "ill see you monday" anyway that night I phoned 999 but an ambulances wouldnt come out!! So I kept my eye on him and noticed it worsening and phoned back then next day....which is when they came....the day after he passed away, just by a bloody cut on his leg, he was 36 years old!!
Ambulance wouldnt take him because he was shouting he didnt want one but i kept saying he wasn't in his right state of mind, he wasnt compus mentis....
Needless to say he never made it to the monday God bless him.
Like you said it doesnt take 12 years to die from this.
People please learn more about sepsis, it will kill you if not treated right.
I’ve thought a lot about this and I wonder if it’s like when you’d hear in the old days…people would be locked in attics and such to keep the rest of the family from feeling “shame” and “embarrassment”. I think they valued their reputations so much that they hoped she’d just die quietly. I hope by Lacey’s horrible condition and death that other people will be proactive in getting help for their loved ones. We live in the richest country in the world…it’s shocking this could ever happen
These are the ppl in power now probably!😂 How shallow do you gotta be man?
That is horrible neglect of a disabled person.
I really don't believe it was neglect. It was, - in my opinion - , on purpose , because they saw her as a disappointment, a failure in their - could be - perfect life. She, a person with authority, carrier, power, give birth to ... "something" less than perfect; beneath their expectations? No!!! I was surprised they called 911 and not tried to just get completely rid of her by buring her somewhere; noone was asking about her anyway...
@@aikaterinimoschou9437 absolutely on purpose. I bet they let the body sit there as long as possible so they could plead insanity.....
I've heard this case before and it is absolutely appalling
Yeah, they all cover the same cases at some point
First time hearing about this case for me. Dang this one was difficult to stomach
heard about this case on tiktok not long ago, even more infuriating when you know all the details. god, she deserved so
much better.
I just looked up Lacey on Google and watched the news segment on her that showed the blurred the photos. The one of Lacey laid face down on the autopsy table just shocked me and made me cry. So little of her left. I read on her Wikipedia page that her parent said they wanted to be parents not caregivers. Being a parent is being a caregiver. I don't think Lacey's autism and cognitive issuses were understood by her parents. God bless you Lacey R.I.P no more suffering xx
Her parents are straight up EVIL! If they didn't want to clean her and care for her, they could have committed her to a hospital where she would have received ACTUAL CARE! I don't care how much of a "burden" it is....I would NEVER treat another human being this way...LET ALONE MY OWN CHILD! DESPICABLE AND DISGUSTING! I do pray they will get judged harshly for this in the next life!
It's possible that lacey had or developed severe agoraphobia ( i think that is what it is and how it's spelled), where she was terrified to leave the home and even the couch, but it is 10000% on her parents for not stepping in and helping her, for not hospitalizing long before it had gotten this for.
A reminder that neglect is also a form of abuse. Inaction to do something when you could have done ANYTHING to help the situation is just as bad as any form of abuse.
well said
I work with adults with developmental disabilities. They had options. There are a million interventions I can think of off hand. Their sentence was BS. This is one of worst cases of neglect and abuse Ive ever heard of. I cant even think of a punishment bad enough. Im just appalled.
Danielle ALWAYS brings the outrage for victims who don't have a voice, for those mistreated and victims who need it most
I know of a similar situation. A guy in his late 40s who hasn’t left his parents basement in over a decade, except when he was unconscious. He has liver failure (because he’s an alcoholic,he gets his alcohol from his parents) he’s a diabetic and has major heart issues. He is yellow due to jaundice from liver failure. His parents are facilitating his slow suicide. He will die in that basement and probably soon.