so fucking relatable i lost my memory about things that happened two recent years after something bad happened. i became different. looking in the mirror is scary, seeing scars is scary. i dye my hair everytime something changes (now i got red btw, and it looks pretty). but recently i noticed that i'm not alone. seems like the past me knocks out of me saying words i don't want to say. if you ask me the same question twice with an interval of some time, I will answer completely different each of them. my art style changes every time a new canvas appears. i do not own my opinion at the same time having almost all of them at once. i do not exist and there is a lot of "me's" exists at the same time.
home isn’t home anymore because it’s ruined nowhere to go nowhere to breathe nowhere to stay nowhere to sleep nowhere to me nowhere to be happy lost in a open world with empty spaces lost in a world with bad places (poem by Ester-5 , me)
That's Lunacy. Sometimes they'll spout out the most incomprehensible string of words possible, like how we are incarnations of god, and mumbling the word 'rabbits' repeatedly in different, non-human accents. Sometimes they're nice. On your bad days they'll be the parent you hoped to have had. Just them existing gives you permission, somehow, to rest and just be. On your good days they'll sit quietly, in that unnerving way they always do; upside down, lovingly cradling a (Human? Animal? Your own?) bleeding heart in their hands, rocking it to sleep. Be nice to Lunacy. If you're lucky and they feel like it, they'll put cheese sticks and pretty leaves under your bed, and swat away bad dreams.
Please I really WANT you to feel better 😊 read this and let me be your hope ♥️ Your feelings are shared with every person in the world, everyone is hurt in their way, everyone can relate to anyone in some way. And think that, Living is always worth, is not the worst or the best thing that can happen to you, it is the only THING that CAN happen to you. Traverse this jungle and know that everything is there to make you stronger. You are strong, I know it, keep going.
I've always had those random scary moments where i started to mentally panic, thinking about how i'm possibly not real. What if my real self is in a coma and i just made my whole life up in my head and one day ill wake up and be a completely differnet person? Sometimes i scare myself thinking too deeply about if this is all a simulation, i don't know my real personality and its honestly frightening at times and i just pick and choose things from peoples personalities i've stolen because i don't know what i like, want, or what to feel at times. Sometimes i don't remember im a person at all like im a ghost or someone's imaginary person that they struggle to pick a personality for. I feel as if past me is slowly leaving piece by piece and now me is leaving soon enough to move onto future me, i feel like there's different versions of me.
Omg same, i relate to this. I sometimes scare myself of how deeply i think about things. Ive been told 'wow you think really deeply about things'. I thought i was the only one.
я просыпаюсь и думаю. для чего я проснулась , если знаю что я ничего не стою. я разочаровываю всех , кто бы не попался мне. я смотрю в зеркало , но то , что в зеркале не я. я не знаю кто это. я не знаю кто я. я хочу это выяснить , но боюсь что окончательно провалюсь. куда я упаду. неизвестность. она пугает и утомляет. я так хочу вернуться в беззаботное детство где мне 5 лет. я так не хочу этого. я не вижу своего будущего. я не вижу в будущем себя , не то что кого то рядом.
**songs here** I have to write something but I don't know how to describe my feelings. I got a lot of hate in my last video because I used "traumacore" in the title. Yes, I know, trauma isn't an aesthetic, but sometimes music like that can help you to understand yourself or just relax. If you feel bad, you can write about it in the comments. I'm willing to talk to you if it makes you happier. I've seen a lot of people go through the pain, so maybe you'll feel better if you talk it out. I love you all ♡ (my English is bad, sorry) picture: pin.it/6zvLYCm picture without effects: pin.it/5wustyi |00:00 - 04:50| mareux - underground |04:50 - 08:15| crystal castles - transgender// slowed + reverb |08:15 - 11:35| zheani - melt away |11:35 - 14:11| ezekiel help_urself// slowed + reverb |14:11 - 17:32| crim3s - lost// slowed + reverb |17:32 - 21:07| pathetic - escalator |21:07 - 26:53| plenka - wearout// slowed |26:53 - 29:00| mareux - the perfect girl// slowed, instrumental |29:00 - 32:39| plenka - deep memory |32:39 - 38:23| molina - hey kids// slowed + reverb, instrumental
I'm always feeling totally unreal and dissociated. When my head is not totally fucking empty, I get these horrible intrusive thoughts. Like, I'll be driving and my brain will just- what if we drove off the road? like, right now, what if you didn't turn and just kept driving? other times, when I'm walking across the street it's just- stop walking. right now. stop walking and let the cars run you over. or yk, my favorite- you could kill everyone in this room rn. and even more- you could cut off your fingers. do it, cut them off. like, wtf brain. I'd rather derealize than deal with this shit. idk sorry for the rant, this playlist just gives off 'my brain is fucked up!' vibes yk yk
Oop you might need to go to therapy . I hear sum depressed kids say they want to kill everyone in the room right now out loud and I'm like "..." But at least you think it's wrong and I hope you get over this
Just sharing a thought that's been in my head for a long time. Whenever I sleep and dream I know I'm dreaming, but for some reason I forget it when I'm dreaming, it's like the dream is my reality when I'm dreaming (I think that's what dreams are though lol) But there are a few times when I know I'm dreaming but it seems like I'm not in control of my own dream. Oh well... Science can explain it 🙃
been feeling this way since around 4 years now, maybe more, and it just gets worse, i can't ever really feel like i'm here or i was ever anywhere, it feels like i'm just existing but not even that, i hate not remembering where i went hours prior, or days, even if they were fun events, or just a regular errand, even when traumatic stuff happens it kinda just goes blank in my mind atp from how normalized it is, idk what to do or how to help myself get out of the situation i'm in
I know who you are, a very special person who deserves everything good in life, and who is loved much more than you think. No matter what you do you will always be a precious being with endless value ❤
i don’t feel like myself at all anymore, well, alone i do but around people.. i feel like that one dumb girl who can’t take anything seriously because thats what i’ve acted like all these years. i just wanted to be likeable, to make people laugh but.. i didn’t know what it would cost me. few people know me for who i am truly and not this completely different version of me that i’ve made. i can’t change now, i’ve made everyone think im that different persona i’ve made of myself. if i change back they think i’m trying to for attention or trying to act “cool”. i’m tired of this, i really am.. i want people to see me as the true me again.
What a wondrous playlist, all the music is exactly what I would have selected for myself to listen too. We all bear the scars of our past in one form or another, but the key is to wear them with pride and confidence. This is what life is all about, because you can view yourself as a victim of circumstance; however, you can change your perspective and draw a new type of strength from those same scars. How do I know this? ― Because, I've done it before by reinventing myself, many times over. The only pressure I place on myself is that I remain a 'good person'. Thank you to "Scars of my Soul" .......!!!!
I had a dream it was a zombie apocalypse and I was an attractive young woman who had a ton of these weird men all up on her and it was lucid too and i could control my breathing ajd my movement. it was one of the rare lucid dreams where It felt extremely real. Like, you know how you're awake and moving and talking now? It felt like that. I thought i really was awake. And there was this one guy who i was apparently with and he looks so much like my bf but so different?????????? Idk but he lived next door. He helped me out of a building that was being raided by these fuckin crazy people. I was trying to make my own group and the crazy people killed most of them off. I was gonna be a survival leader :( fuckers ruined it. You know reality checks? I've been doing those alot and I always try to see if I can do something irl what I'd want to do in a dream. I tried to make something happen but I couldn't. So I was convinced this was real. I was too focused on surviving and getting to know this dude who saved me. Even though the dream also had some weirdcore elements like eyes in the sky. I thought this was how I was gonna live now. I thought this was legit. Like i felt how i feel now. With movements, breathing. I was in such a deep slumber, I couldn't wake up. I didn't even try to wake up. I felt alive there. Like literally alive. While I felt dead before I fell asleep here. Last night I was having an "episode" where I felt nothing but empty and hollow and it physically hurt when I tried to force myself out of it. I let it linger, but I was forcing myself to talk to other people. I felt so dead here, and when I fell asleep and had that dream, I felt so alive. Its funny. I feel better now though. It was scary but pretty cool. Right now I feel fine-ish, but I'm still struggling. Your videos have been helping me. The "you're not real" playlist has been in my playlists on loop for the past week lmao. Thank you.
it actually scares me realising what I’m becoming because I’m not sure why or how it’s happening. I’ve always known there’s something wrong with me but now it’s getting worse, I’m loosing everybody, in alone again, I’m stuck with online boys to give me the slightest bit of hope, I’m getting help it’s doing nothing, I’m not getting better I don’t get better I’m not like anybody else my age, nobody’s listening to me even when I’m crying for help, I’m just the rude girl the one who can’t keep friendships, the one that wants to be alone all the time, and all I want is somebody to understand me, but nobody can understand if i can’t understand myself. I’m young but I feel older, so little time has passed in my life yet it feels like it’s been to long, the thoughts are always in my head, “what if you just ran away?” , “what if you just died right now?” . I’m tired and I’m loosing patients. I really don’t know who I am, who I wanna be, or what I wanna be. I’m a failure waiting to happen, I’m a disappoint, I’m just so stuck and it feels like I can’t move. My life is falling apart, there’s nothing I can say or do to stop it, I’m just watching my life get broken apart. I don’t feel like I care anymore but as soon as I think deep enough I realise I’m such a damaged person and I don’t understand why, my life isn’t that bad I ruin things myself. I wouldn’t blame my family bevause I have a loving and caring family, but sometimes the way they treat and compare me affects me a lot. I’m so misunderstood and seen as the bad one, I know I’m a good person i just need to find myself.
I hear ya, the only thing that helps is to get high so don't you feel anything . I mean isn't it better than hurting all the times? I too seem be losing a part of humanity and really care I'm losing it. Every day that goes by I get more apathetic and nihlistic. People like us are just sad and hopeless by nature, i say we embrace who we are and the unique pov that can be to people that endlessly to present and convince themselves that happiness is the only worth while emotion.
you know this playlist sounds less like us trying find out who/what someone is, it actually sounds more like that something is asking us, "who are we?" and I think that's cool!!
I sometimes forget where I am and who I am, well not totally who I am but I just forget what happened but when I remember I just idk wish I wasn’t so confused of what my mental state was
Sometimes at night when I’m awake I get a paralysis like fear for basically no reason and have a heavy paranoia of being watched at the corner of my room, bed, desk or whatever and I just snap out of it for whatever reason, maybe it’s because whenever I look away and hide it feels better? Idk I’m just not okay
I guess I have the time for it. I am not anymore man. I am not anyone, not with anyone, do not belong to any group. There is not one person I talk to. It gets worse every day, and it furthers me down this insanity I have held within me since I dawned onto this earth. I have failed time and time again. There is nobody that can save me from it all. From losing everyone, to poisoning myself, to scraping the skin off me, there's been little. I don't have a soul. As to why that's the case... It's because I don't deserve any of it. Simple. But at the same time I wonder why this world does not give me a break, a routine, or something to free myself for even a day. The reason is unfortunate, because those that run the world hate me. And with a fiery passion. They've taken away everything, and I can only regret myself.
I love your…. I love your smile I love your laugh I love your hair I love your eyes I love your personality I love your feeling I love your scars I love your cry I love your height I love your mental health I love your weight I love your sass I love your voice I love your walk I love your typing skills I love your insecurities I love your nose I love your mouth I love your hips I love your jaw I love your legs I love your thighs I love your feet I love your hand I JUST LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i mostly will understand some problems like pass away's,words,shaming,fake friends,pets dying,losing a friend in the most hurtful way,body shame,talked behind my back,bully,scratching until i get scars,hurtful words,divorced then getting back together and losing people as you walk. so no hate i feel broken i need better friends haha just like this:)
Why do people don’t trust my Tounge, I’m a sickness… some people don’t get infected, except me.. I’m tired of being sickness like irl, wish I get it healthy more… 😢
thats ok, I try to choose the personality I like the most among them when I am alone, and I tey to consider myself a jack of all traits when im with different people, I think that my personality itself is like being a chamilion idk😅 But I'm ok with that
warning! read with a guarded mind please make sure you expect to read some BAD stuff I'm not pulling punches and i am sorry for the dump for emotions below please skip if you don't want to read or if you aren't in the right frame of mind anyway... here it goes . . . yesterday i had the day off of work so i slept until 3am woke up looked at the time on my phone. Then went back to sleep and had this strange dream where i knew all these people i'd never seen before and i knew them well by name relationship and out of a mouth that wasn't mine i heard this voice that wasn't mine but i knew it was? speak and create convos and was actually good... at small talk! after that i followed around "me" that clearly wasn't me 'cause i am female at birth and this person was male at birth and had light brown hair and blue eyes a twin sis and a missing sister that "i" and two of the sisters friends were looking for "my" sister...( irl a loner cis female only child who's adopted and a visual minority in place of residence) the last thing i saw in that dream was "my" mother slice me in the back and the dad filling "me" up with stones asking "how many more honey?" That's when i woke up for the second time or so i thought i had I ended up just switching families in my current dream so instead of the murder parents, the fraternal twin, and missing sister fam i was in one of the missing sisters friends perspective like third viewing it not like "spectator" but from a few paces behind said person looking at their head from the back but in the air? but anyways more shit happend and i looked up what the dream was trying to tell me and baisically I need therepy(sp? sorry) and a lot of support and just life help because this just ain't it chief.. :[
Афигенное чувство слушать музыку в 4 утра и ничего не понимать, если скажите мне почему не спишь? То я при смерти можно сказать, мне надо просто на узи головы,хз🤌🏻
Who am I? I am Lorette. However I’m not Lorette. I’m only referred to as Lorette. I am his. I am groomed. I am his, His body, His toy, Toy. Doll. Dress up, Undress, Help, I am his, I love him, Im so afraid, Im terrified even. I can’t escape him, His hands are still on me.
rly liking the amount of russian listeniners of this type and similiar type of songs, i can finally utilize my russian to read the comments and lyrics like Pathetics music
я устала, просто устала. уже не хочется никакого тепла, не хочется никого и ничего, я подумываю о том, чтобы бросить всех, сменить номер и полностью отгородиться от всех своих близких и знакомых. я не знаю, что мне делать, не знаю как сделать себе лучше, я запуталась, потерялась и не думаю, что кто-нибудь сможет мне помочь с этим.
Its ok, when this passes you will remember this phase as the darkness before the dawn, and you will be able to tell a great story about self-love and growth
Who am I ? It doesn't matter who I am no one will remember me anyway. Our lives do too little of a difference for us to be remembered We are just a brief scream in a crowd at most. We will be forgotten
I know it doesn't feel like it but you'll get through it. I know I did and you can to It does get better You'll keep growing as a person, learn to find your own balance and bits of happiness, be kind to yourself and take care or yourself, surround yourself with the right kind of people and so on Doesn't mean that everyday will be easy but that's true for everyone
Happy late birthday. I just turned 17 and i feel like my whole life is just going away and my teenage years are wasting away. I think alot about how i wish i could just sleep forever and not wake up. Or lucid dream and go on so many adventures and that can be my life.
It symbolizes not an escape, rather the hatred I am engulfed in and the awful position of my current psyche. I fucking hate this town. I need to leave. I am going to leave. That is why I work every fucking day to get out of this hellscape.
A hatred of similar between many people, even such long times ago. Revenge isn’t a dish to serve cold to anyone when alone in a empty space but that of why you are in the space in the first place would make you wish you are able to leave and continue to make more hatred and resentment for the same place, the same few walls corroding slowly over weeks, months, years. I can’t wait to leave and see other things then my own walls that in confined to. CPS sucks everywhere
"who are you?" "who are you? why are you in my room?" "Oh no...oh no you have to wake up. you don't belong here if you continue you'll never get out and if she finds out.." "you have to wake up, get out of here hurry....you have too...."
хороший плейлист для того чтобы делать открытки к уч.практике ночью. ненавижу долги, но вот она я: по уши увязла в долгах по учёбе, должна нормально спать, но с трудом засыпаю на кровати. ещё и долбаный нормальный мокап конверта найти не могу. настроение поныть
2016:best year ever 2017:fortnite = fun 2018:lit 2019:its aight 2020:boring but fun playing 2021:ok. Its getting boring with vaccines.. 2022:finally fun all these memes are Fun 2023:🫤 2024'😕
Я устала. Я устала жить, есть, спать, дышать. Кроме мыслей о смерти в голове больше ничего. Пусто. И в груди тоже пусто, настолько, что её просто распирает. Умереть у меня не получается, и это гнетёт ещё сильнее. Это высасывает все силы, так что я не могу даже подняться с кровати чтобы поесть. Иногда мне кажется, что всё это просто реалистичная игра, из которой нельзя выйти. Только во сне я могу уйти. Но меня одолевает бессонница, поэтому я не могу даже этого. Я тону в самой себе. И я не знаю, что мне делать
"When sleep isn't just sleep, its an escape from reality"
this is fucking scary because I woke up after sleeping all day and just saw your comment
My favourite quote
I can’t explain how relatable this is
@@rinnssss Dont be scared..:)
@@user-rl6wr2ny7f "We live in an actual NIGHTMAAAARE"
*I know you desperately want love, but you cant.*
so fucking relatable
i lost my memory about things that happened two recent years after something bad happened. i became different. looking in the mirror is scary, seeing scars is scary. i dye my hair everytime something changes (now i got red btw, and it looks pretty). but recently i noticed that i'm not alone. seems like the past me knocks out of me saying words i don't want to say. if you ask me the same question twice with an interval of some time, I will answer completely different each of them. my art style changes every time a new canvas appears. i do not own my opinion at the same time having almost all of them at once. i do not exist and there is a lot of "me's" exists at the same time.
I feel you
@@ArtenGo33 патамушто русский
I have borderline personality disorder and I approve this message
как же я понимаю, у самого происходит непонятно что
@@NorisGame1 удачи с этим.. после войны полетело всё да?
This reminds me of the person I was in 2020. So lost & depressed. Now here I am, happier but so lonely
"Is this a dream? ... This is a dream, isn't it? .... I'm bored. I want out."
-Me, 4 days ago while having a nightmare
what was said here?
Was it scary?
😢
why do things this way?
isid? no sloth, no weird, ;- ; you know my order
😊
I want to go home
“But you are home”
No. You aren’t listening.
*I want to go home*
Yeah. I feel that sometimes.
home isn’t home anymore because it’s ruined
nowhere to go nowhere to breathe
nowhere to stay nowhere to sleep
nowhere to me nowhere to be happy
lost in a open world with empty spaces
lost in a world with bad places
(poem by Ester-5 , me)
Songs:
|00:00 - 04:50| mareux - underground
|04:50 - 08:15| crystal castles - transgender// slowed + reverb
|08:15 - 11:35| zheani - melt away
|11:35 - 14:11| ezekiel help_urself// slowed + reverb
|14:11 - 17:32| crim3s - lost// slowed + reverb
|17:32 - 21:07| pathetic - escalator
|21:07 - 26:53| plenka - wearout// slowed
|26:53 - 29:00| mareux - the perfect girl// slowed, instrumental
|29:00 - 32:39| plenka - deep memory
|32:39 - 38:23| molina - hey kids// slowed + reverb, instrumental
Your welcome
I appreciate this
Thank u sm🫶
.
@@noneOfUrBussines12 No problem, also i know its just an emoji but thanks for the hug i really needed it 🫶 or the heart, whatever it is.
@@sophiarutledge5030 you’re very welcome =)
@@sophiarutledge5030 what genre of music is this?
POR FIN UNA PLAYLIST QUE NO PONE LAS MISMAS MÚSICAS DE SIEMPRE AAAAA
Epicoo
Né
Confirmo esta playlist es una joyita
@user_kokoko y si
Вау, какой же всё-таки шикарный плейлист у вас получился! Слушаю уже который раз, не могу наслушаться. Вы святой человек, ваша работа бесподобна
@wuzzles негр?
@@Гомори да.
согласна.
когда я попросила бога избавить меня от врагов, куда то стали пропадать мои друзья.... я хочу какать
@@dDaunebani покакала?
“Who are you??”
“I’m you I think”
“If your me…who’s that in the corner”
Ur intrusive thoughts 🧍
That's Lunacy. Sometimes they'll spout out the most incomprehensible string of words possible, like how we are incarnations of god, and mumbling the word 'rabbits' repeatedly in different, non-human accents. Sometimes they're nice. On your bad days they'll be the parent you hoped to have had. Just them existing gives you permission, somehow, to rest and just be. On your good days they'll sit quietly, in that unnerving way they always do; upside down, lovingly cradling a (Human? Animal? Your own?) bleeding heart in their hands, rocking it to sleep.
Be nice to Lunacy. If you're lucky and they feel like it, they'll put cheese sticks and pretty leaves under your bed, and swat away bad dreams.
@@aestheticallycutie2594 make! them! stop! .... f$#@ .
shit hit deep fr
i love this kind of music
Same💃
Weirdcore
Traumacore
Dreamcore
right?
It's nice, it kinda reminds me of my.. PHONE OWNERS... trauma bonds and why there still endlessly orbiting around me still .....haha.
Também ❤️
Last time I listened to this was like two years ago, or at least it sure seems like it. the years seem to fly by yet time flows so slow
It was only made 2 months ago tho 🤨
@@YorkieYolk fr lmao
U mean so fast..?
“The days are long but the years are short”
Please I really WANT you to feel better 😊 read this and let me be your hope ♥️
Your feelings are shared with every person in the world, everyone is hurt in their way, everyone can relate to anyone in some way. And think that, Living is always worth, is not the worst or the best thing that can happen to you, it is the only THING that CAN happen to you.
Traverse this jungle and know that everything is there to make you stronger. You are strong, I know it, keep going.
This is my favourite playlist ever. Thank you so much for this!
mwah.
Chef's kiss.
10/10.
Would listen again.
Do recommend.
I've always had those random scary moments where i started to mentally panic, thinking about how i'm possibly not real. What if my real self is in a coma and i just made my whole life up in my head and one day ill wake up and be a completely differnet person? Sometimes i scare myself thinking too deeply about if this is all a simulation, i don't know my real personality and its honestly frightening at times and i just pick and choose things from peoples personalities i've stolen because i don't know what i like, want, or what to feel at times. Sometimes i don't remember im a person at all like im a ghost or someone's imaginary person that they struggle to pick a personality for. I feel as if past me is slowly leaving piece by piece and now me is leaving soon enough to move onto future me, i feel like there's different versions of me.
Omg same, i relate to this. I sometimes scare myself of how deeply i think about things. Ive been told 'wow you think really deeply about things'. I thought i was the only one.
Same..
я просыпаюсь и думаю. для чего я проснулась , если знаю что я ничего не стою. я разочаровываю всех , кто бы не попался мне. я смотрю в зеркало , но то , что в зеркале не я. я не знаю кто это. я не знаю кто я. я хочу это выяснить , но боюсь что окончательно провалюсь. куда я упаду. неизвестность. она пугает и утомляет. я так хочу вернуться в беззаботное детство где мне 5 лет. я так не хочу этого. я не вижу своего будущего. я не вижу в будущем себя , не то что кого то рядом.
@@Salo_-ko6cs мазохизм не помогает.. никому и никогда не поможет
под эту музыку хочется убивать
**songs here**
I have to write something but I don't know how to describe my feelings. I got a lot of hate in my last video because I used "traumacore" in the title. Yes, I know, trauma isn't an aesthetic, but sometimes music like that can help you to understand yourself or just relax. If you feel bad, you can write about it in the comments. I'm willing to talk to you if it makes you happier. I've seen a lot of people go through the pain, so maybe you'll feel better if you talk it out. I love you all ♡ (my English is bad, sorry)
picture: pin.it/6zvLYCm
picture without effects: pin.it/5wustyi
|00:00 - 04:50| mareux - underground
|04:50 - 08:15| crystal castles - transgender// slowed + reverb
|08:15 - 11:35| zheani - melt away
|11:35 - 14:11| ezekiel help_urself// slowed + reverb
|14:11 - 17:32| crim3s - lost// slowed + reverb
|17:32 - 21:07| pathetic - escalator
|21:07 - 26:53| plenka - wearout// slowed
|26:53 - 29:00| mareux - the perfect girl// slowed, instrumental
|29:00 - 32:39| plenka - deep memory
|32:39 - 38:23| molina - hey kids// slowed + reverb, instrumental
your an awesome person, you don’t deserve the hate :(
@@cherry7638 omg thanks ♡
ur best, don't stop doing this stuff, your playlists are really helps me, good luck to u
just ignore those, u are doing your best and you are helping alot of people with your music playlist. Keep it up bro.
actually it helps me with my mental state and trauma , thank you sm for making this
波をつくる人は至るところに🌊🎵
まるで私の心を読み取っているかのような鋭さを含んだプレイリスト。最近心が疲れてわけもなく涙が出そうになる時があります。そんな時にこれらの音が私の脳裏をよぎります。
I'm always feeling totally unreal and dissociated. When my head is not totally fucking empty, I get these horrible intrusive thoughts. Like, I'll be driving and my brain will just- what if we drove off the road? like, right now, what if you didn't turn and just kept driving?
other times, when I'm walking across the street it's just- stop walking. right now. stop walking and let the cars run you over.
or yk, my favorite- you could kill everyone in this room rn.
and even more- you could cut off your fingers. do it, cut them off.
like, wtf brain. I'd rather derealize than deal with this shit.
idk sorry for the rant, this playlist just gives off 'my brain is fucked up!' vibes yk yk
I got the same shit going on.. it’s fucking terrifying but I hope you’re doing okay rn 🥺🖤
@@SynDoesStuff thank you, you too
Yes sometimes I feel like killing everyone I hate too. I recently sliced my 'friend's' arm with a scissors I don't know why
Oop you might need to go to therapy . I hear sum depressed kids say they want to kill everyone in the room right now out loud and I'm like "..." But at least you think it's wrong and I hope you get over this
Thats the call of the void
Это прекрасно, именно то чего не хватало. Пожалуй, лучший плейлист.
Кабуу на аве, мое уважение чувак
i just want to be free
i just want to be bad
to prove i was good
slide 4
I see where you're coming from
i usually don’t like most playlists, but this one blew me away. great job ^^
Music like this makes me feel sage for some reason.
Just sharing a thought that's been in my head for a long time. Whenever I sleep and dream I know I'm dreaming, but for some reason I forget it when I'm dreaming, it's like the dream is my reality when I'm dreaming (I think that's what dreams are though lol) But there are a few times when I know I'm dreaming but it seems like I'm not in control of my own dream. Oh well... Science can explain it 🙃
erm so lucid dreaming
시험기간 새벽에 이거들으면서 공부하면 진짜 말도 안되게 피폐한 느낌이 몰려오는데 오히려 그때 파괴적인 생각이 들면서 더 잘됨....
뭔가 내 이성을 팔아서 집중력을 사는 느낌이라고 해야될까요.... 플리 좋네요
been feeling this way since around 4 years now, maybe more, and it just gets worse, i can't ever really feel like i'm here or i was ever anywhere, it feels like i'm just existing but not even that, i hate not remembering where i went hours prior, or days, even if they were fun events, or just a regular errand, even when traumatic stuff happens it kinda just goes blank in my mind atp from how normalized it is, idk what to do or how to help myself get out of the situation i'm in
haha its funny, because looking at yourself is like looking at someone else. because at that point, you dont know who you are. you are a stranger.
I know who you are, a very special person who deserves everything good in life, and who is loved much more than you think.
No matter what you do you will always be a precious being with endless value ❤
нашла этот плейлист в 2022, не слушала с того года, а сейчас еду под него в автобусе так же как год назад, и всё такое родное.
дада
"who are you?"
"who am I?"
"I'm the dark man in the corner of your twisted mind."
"and I'm the victim."
mas de un año escuchando todo tu contenido y no me canso de esta sensacion que me deja en esta extraña soledad.
i don’t feel like myself at all anymore, well, alone i do but around people.. i feel like that one dumb girl who can’t take anything seriously because thats what i’ve acted like all these years. i just wanted to be likeable, to make people laugh but.. i didn’t know what it would cost me. few people know me for who i am truly and not this completely different version of me that i’ve made. i can’t change now, i’ve made everyone think im that different persona i’ve made of myself. if i change back they think i’m trying to for attention or trying to act “cool”. i’m tired of this, i really am.. i want people to see me as the true me again.
this playlist >>>>
как же мне помогает такая музыка, можно поплакать но потом станет легче
+
++
we need more playlists. your taste and thumbnails are original works
What a wondrous playlist, all the music is exactly what I would have selected for myself to listen too. We all bear the scars of our past in one form or another, but the key is to wear them with pride and confidence. This is what life is all about, because you can view yourself as a victim of circumstance; however, you can change your perspective and draw a new type of strength from those same scars.
How do I know this? ― Because, I've done it before by reinventing myself, many times over. The only pressure I place on myself is that I remain a 'good person'.
Thank you to "Scars of my Soul" .......!!!!
Great, hits close to home
I had a dream it was a zombie apocalypse and I was an attractive young woman who had a ton of these weird men all up on her and it was lucid too and i could control my breathing ajd my movement. it was one of the rare lucid dreams where It felt extremely real. Like, you know how you're awake and moving and talking now? It felt like that. I thought i really was awake. And there was this one guy who i was apparently with and he looks so much like my bf but so different?????????? Idk but he lived next door. He helped me out of a building that was being raided by these fuckin crazy people. I was trying to make my own group and the crazy people killed most of them off. I was gonna be a survival leader :( fuckers ruined it. You know reality checks? I've been doing those alot and I always try to see if I can do something irl what I'd want to do in a dream. I tried to make something happen but I couldn't. So I was convinced this was real. I was too focused on surviving and getting to know this dude who saved me. Even though the dream also had some weirdcore elements like eyes in the sky.
I thought this was how I was gonna live now. I thought this was legit. Like i felt how i feel now. With movements, breathing. I was in such a deep slumber, I couldn't wake up. I didn't even try to wake up. I felt alive there. Like literally alive. While I felt dead before I fell asleep here. Last night I was having an "episode" where I felt nothing but empty and hollow and it physically hurt when I tried to force myself out of it. I let it linger, but I was forcing myself to talk to other people. I felt so dead here, and when I fell asleep and had that dream, I felt so alive. Its funny. I feel better now though. It was scary but pretty cool.
Right now I feel fine-ish, but I'm still struggling. Your videos have been helping me. The "you're not real" playlist has been in my playlists on loop for the past week lmao. Thank you.
IT'S BEST COMMENT FOR TODAY!
@@rinnssss Oh, ty. :)
Your playlists are amazing!
@@justadissociativewriter you seriously have the best comment here
@@user-gu8wp5dy9h oh ty :)
♥️
I known this feeling since childhood
it actually scares me realising what I’m becoming because I’m not sure why or how it’s happening. I’ve always known there’s something wrong with me but now it’s getting worse, I’m loosing everybody, in alone again, I’m stuck with online boys to give me the slightest bit of hope, I’m getting help it’s doing nothing, I’m not getting better I don’t get better I’m not like anybody else my age, nobody’s listening to me even when I’m crying for help, I’m just the rude girl the one who can’t keep friendships, the one that wants to be alone all the time, and all I want is somebody to understand me, but nobody can understand if i can’t understand myself. I’m young but I feel older, so little time has passed in my life yet it feels like it’s been to long, the thoughts are always in my head, “what if you just ran away?” , “what if you just died right now?” . I’m tired and I’m loosing patients. I really don’t know who I am, who I wanna be, or what I wanna be. I’m a failure waiting to happen, I’m a disappoint, I’m just so stuck and it feels like I can’t move. My life is falling apart, there’s nothing I can say or do to stop it, I’m just watching my life get broken apart. I don’t feel like I care anymore but as soon as I think deep enough I realise I’m such a damaged person and I don’t understand why, my life isn’t that bad I ruin things myself. I wouldn’t blame my family bevause I have a loving and caring family, but sometimes the way they treat and compare me affects me a lot. I’m so misunderstood and seen as the bad one, I know I’m a good person i just need to find myself.
I hear ya, the only thing that helps is to get high so don't you feel anything . I mean isn't it better than hurting all the times? I too seem be losing a part of humanity and really care I'm losing it. Every day that goes by I get more apathetic and nihlistic. People like us are just sad and hopeless by nature, i say we embrace who we are and the unique pov that can be to people that endlessly to present and convince themselves that happiness is the only worth while emotion.
you know this playlist sounds less like us trying find out who/what someone is, it actually sounds more like that something is asking us, "who are we?" and I think that's cool!!
That's actually the point lol
I sometimes forget where I am and who I am, well not totally who I am but I just forget what happened but when I remember I just idk wish I wasn’t so confused of what my mental state was
Sometimes at night when I’m awake I get a paralysis like fear for basically no reason and have a heavy paranoia of being watched at the corner of my room, bed, desk or whatever and I just snap out of it for whatever reason, maybe it’s because whenever I look away and hide it feels better? Idk I’m just not okay
lately my dreams are either nightmares or realistic dreams where i cant tell if something actually happened or was it just a dream
I guess I have the time for it.
I am not anymore man. I am not anyone, not with anyone, do not belong to any group. There is not one person I talk to. It gets worse every day, and it furthers me down this insanity I have held within me since I dawned onto this earth. I have failed time and time again. There is nobody that can save me from it all. From losing everyone, to poisoning myself, to scraping the skin off me, there's been little. I don't have a soul. As to why that's the case...
It's because I don't deserve any of it.
Simple. But at the same time I wonder why this world does not give me a break, a routine, or something to free myself for even a day. The reason is unfortunate, because those that run the world hate me. And with a fiery passion. They've taken away everything, and I can only regret myself.
you wrote my exact feelings down for the past couple years. i rlly hope we get through this soon
@@hurricanelem i hope the same for you, we can get through this :)
erm waht the sigma
@@sserenaali looking back at this i was definitely a 15 year old
well whatev
@@calibvr bro was not a 15 year old
i can't get out, i'm trapped
how u doing
боже мой это прекрасный плейлист просто шикарный и лучший
I love your….
I love your smile
I love your laugh
I love your hair
I love your eyes
I love your personality
I love your feeling
I love your scars
I love your cry
I love your height
I love your mental health
I love your weight
I love your sass
I love your voice
I love your walk
I love your typing skills
I love your insecurities
I love your nose
I love your mouth
I love your hips
I love your jaw
I love your legs
I love your thighs
I love your feet
I love your hand
I JUST LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i mostly will understand some problems like pass away's,words,shaming,fake friends,pets dying,losing a friend in the most hurtful way,body shame,talked behind my back,bully,scratching until i get scars,hurtful words,divorced then getting back together and losing people as you walk. so no hate i feel broken i need better friends haha just like this:)
Why do people don’t trust my Tounge, I’m a sickness… some people don’t get infected, except me.. I’m tired of being sickness like irl, wish I get it healthy more… 😢
I have so many different personalities for different people to accept me, and I can't figure out what my real personality is anymore.
thats ok, I try to choose the personality I like the most among them when I am alone, and I tey to consider myself a jack of all traits when im with different people, I think that my personality itself is like being a chamilion idk😅
But I'm ok with that
warning! read with a guarded mind please make sure you expect to read some BAD stuff I'm not pulling punches and i am sorry for the dump for emotions below please skip if you don't want to read or if you aren't in the right frame of mind anyway...
here
it goes
.
.
.
yesterday i had the day off of work so i slept until 3am woke up looked at the time on my phone. Then went back to sleep and had this strange dream where i knew all these people i'd never seen before and i knew them well by name relationship and out of a mouth that wasn't mine i heard this voice that wasn't mine but i knew it was? speak and create convos and was actually good... at small talk! after that i followed around "me" that clearly wasn't me 'cause i am female at birth and this person was male at birth and had light brown hair and blue eyes a twin sis and a missing sister that "i" and two of the sisters friends were looking for "my" sister...( irl a loner cis female only child who's adopted and a visual minority in place of residence) the last thing i saw in that dream was "my" mother slice me in the back and the dad filling "me" up with stones asking "how many more honey?" That's when i woke up for the second time or so i thought i had I ended up just switching families in my current dream so instead of the murder parents, the fraternal twin, and missing sister fam i was in one of the missing sisters friends perspective like third viewing it not like "spectator" but from a few paces behind said person looking at their head from the back but in the air? but anyways more shit happend and i looked up what the dream was trying to tell me and baisically I need therepy(sp? sorry) and a lot of support and just life help because this just ain't it chief.. :[
are you okay m8?
I love your playlists, please keep on making them! :D
este playlist es buenísimo xd
no pone las mismas canciones como en otros playlist
y a parte puso mis favoritas :'D
9:23 like this part but this is even better! 14:33 , 17:37 and happiness lastly.. 32:45
I love these
Sometimes I can't tell the difference between my lucid dreams and reality... mostly because the dreams feel more real
"The feeling"
Something go through inside me, that i cant see"
Афигенное чувство слушать музыку в 4 утра и ничего не понимать, если скажите мне почему не спишь? То я при смерти можно сказать, мне надо просто на узи головы,хз🤌🏻
I feel trapped in my own head, I just think. Nothing..else...
Who am I?
I am Lorette.
However I’m not Lorette.
I’m only referred to as Lorette.
I am his.
I am groomed.
I am his,
His body,
His toy,
Toy.
Doll.
Dress up,
Undress,
Help,
I am his,
I love him,
Im so afraid,
Im terrified even.
I can’t escape him,
His hands are still on me.
It began as 11 and 25
It now lies at 14 and 28.
Holy fuck you good?
You need to talk to someone about this
These playlist are gold
Thank you
this playlist is so fcking good..thank you for this music,it helps me (& not only me ;) to be alone with myself deep in the labyrinths of my mind.🫶🏻
Now this is a great playlist.
Yall crying asf to this playlist mean while I'm working out for 2 hours to this playlist
Perfect playlist for shadow work. Thank you, Universe 🤓💖
yes finally a playlist with zheani, i love them sm
"Goodbyes are not forever, goodbyes are not the end, they simply mean ill miss you until we meet again" -anonymous
rly liking the amount of russian listeniners of this type and similiar type of songs, i can finally utilize my russian to read the comments and lyrics like Pathetics music
I love this playlist!
я устала, просто устала. уже не хочется никакого тепла, не хочется никого и ничего, я подумываю о том, чтобы бросить всех, сменить номер и полностью отгородиться от всех своих близких и знакомых. я не знаю, что мне делать, не знаю как сделать себе лучше, я запуталась, потерялась и не думаю, что кто-нибудь сможет мне помочь с этим.
Нет нерешаемых проблем, всё наладится когда придёт время. Ты огромный молодец что можешь так смело сказать о своих проблемах в сети.
Its ok, when this passes you will remember this phase as the darkness before the dawn, and you will be able to tell a great story about self-love and growth
this is one of those playlist that bring different people from around the world and it's cool.
I'm in love with your scars too
i love the playlist and musics good video i love it 🌸✨
This playlist is it's own core ...But I'm not complaining
What genre of music is this popping up in my recommended and I like it
qué buena playlist lpm, perfecta para disociar en tu cuarto
all songs hit you hard
I need to get out..
Who am I ? It doesn't matter who I am no one will remember me anyway. Our lives do too little of a difference for us to be remembered
We are just a brief scream in a crowd at most.
We will be forgotten
I feel exhausted it doesn't even feel like I'm turning 20 tomorrow I just want to be able to sleep and never wake up
Happy late birthday dude, i hope you feel better
i will be 20 next year. i dont know how i'll make it. but keep going i know its exhausting, still- keep going. i will too
I know it doesn't feel like it but you'll get through it. I know I did and you can to
It does get better
You'll keep growing as a person, learn to find your own balance and bits of happiness, be kind to yourself and take care or yourself, surround yourself with the right kind of people and so on
Doesn't mean that everyday will be easy but that's true for everyone
Happy late birthday. I just turned 17 and i feel like my whole life is just going away and my teenage years are wasting away. I think alot about how i wish i could just sleep forever and not wake up. Or lucid dream and go on so many adventures and that can be my life.
why am I not happy that COVID is gone?
It symbolizes not an escape, rather the hatred I am engulfed in and the awful position of my current psyche. I fucking hate this town. I need to leave. I am going to leave. That is why I work every fucking day to get out of this hellscape.
A hatred of similar between many people, even such long times ago. Revenge isn’t a dish to serve cold to anyone when alone in a empty space but that of why you are in the space in the first place would make you wish you are able to leave and continue to make more hatred and resentment for the same place, the same few walls corroding slowly over weeks, months, years. I can’t wait to leave and see other things then my own walls that in confined to. CPS sucks everywhere
давно я так сладко не спала
best playlist of all time
"who are you?"
"who are you? why are you in my room?"
"Oh no...oh no you have to wake up. you don't belong here if you continue you'll never get out and if she finds out.."
"you have to wake up, get out of here hurry....you have too...."
хороший плейлист для того чтобы делать открытки к уч.практике ночью.
ненавижу долги, но вот она я: по уши увязла в долгах по учёбе, должна нормально спать, но с трудом засыпаю на кровати.
ещё и долбаный нормальный мокап конверта найти не могу.
настроение поныть
2016:best year ever
2017:fortnite = fun
2018:lit
2019:its aight
2020:boring but fun playing
2021:ok. Its getting boring with vaccines..
2022:finally fun all these memes are
Fun
2023:🫤
2024'😕
bro could u make a new playlist like this style again?
great playlist
Yup I found my people
the eeper 😦{ great playlist btw!!! }
this is art.
How the fuck did I get here... Oh wait... I kinda like it. Yeah. It's nice. I think I'll stay for awhile. 🍄🔮🐰🕳️🪦🪦🤓
I LOVE THIS !
this is the video i listen to when i sleep
Damn this playlist is so weird :0 I like itt
"Are you lost? Well, I can't help you, [Redacted]… Good luck. Or not. I don't care..."
Guys are you kidding? Songs have long been in a pinned comment
Я устала. Я устала жить, есть, спать, дышать.
Кроме мыслей о смерти в голове больше ничего. Пусто. И в груди тоже пусто, настолько, что её просто распирает. Умереть у меня не получается, и это гнетёт ещё сильнее. Это высасывает все силы, так что я не могу даже подняться с кровати чтобы поесть.
Иногда мне кажется, что всё это просто реалистичная игра, из которой нельзя выйти.
Только во сне я могу уйти. Но меня одолевает бессонница, поэтому я не могу даже этого.
Я тону в самой себе.
И я не знаю, что мне делать
Your playlists are beautiful
I just hope one day I will be listening to them to enjoy the songs and not internally cry to them.
Starting with Mareux? This is my favorite playlist now, thank you!🖤🖤
let me throw you away like i do all the other toys
этот плейлист так успокаивает...
i wish i knew what went wrong and i wish my smile was real
fake, fake and fake
«почему как бы мне не было хорошо с утра,всегда ночью возвращаюсь сюда?»