First Sign Your Lover is Controlling
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ม.ค. 2016
- The first sign that someone is trying to control you is when they isolate you from your friends, says Judge Lynn, and her recommendation is to run.
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Step 1: Isolation from family and friends.
Step 2: Purposely sabotaging work obligations: before, during and after.
Step 3: Put downs. Controlling what you wear, and where you go.
Next step: Physical, emotional and/or financial abuse.
When someone shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM!
Run baby Run, you didn't sign up for a Prison Sentence.
@Val Soda She better get on her bike & pedal like hell to get away from him. He even standing up there looking crazy like “dam the judge is right about me”.
Judge Lynn is filled with so much discernment and wisdom. I love some DC
My ex told me I was "too nice to people," and he didn't want me to have my own friends, but us to have "our friends" Lynn is right. Red Flag number 1
Penny Dreadful too nice to people is something different than having your own friends. My gf used to be too nice to people and she would get taken advantage of. So when I told her that I was just watching out for her
I would’ve left him immediately❗️
@@BIGGOODBOY that's a different scenario.
Listen to the judge! I went through this. Dated someone who tried to isolate me not only from my guy friends who ive known for years and they have no interest in me! But also friends that are girls who he thought were all hoes and bad influences for me and my ex said that girls all act the same to their friends so he called me a hoe occasionally too when I had to block my guy friends and rarely hangout with my friends that were girls. It just got more controlling, sexist, and abusive. He said I couldnt walk in my neighborhood because Im a girl and cant protect myself. Just leave if you see signs like this. I stayed for 11 months and lost my self worth
I know your pain Queen
I’m glad you’re doing better and got out of that toxic situation!!
Im not victim blaming but how did you not leave in the first 3 months. You really endure that kind of toxicity for 11 months. Im hope you are feeling okay now.
@@elvespresley2282 well 1. I got into the relay at 17 years old, 2. He was 2 years older than me, 3. He knew exactly how to manipulate me, 4. It was my first serious relationship so I wanted it to work
That goes the same vice-versa gentleman if you're with a lady that's that controlling you need to leave quickly
This is why I stay single. Relationships are overrated and people just want to come in and treat you any way they want. My sanity and peace of mind is far more precious than me having the ability to say I have someone
Brandon the shapeshifter I totally agree 💯
Brandon the shapeshifter PREACH!!
You're acting as if these types of things can'thappen in platonic relationships. As if you can't befriend someoen that isolates you from your family, lies about you and to you,, makes you feel like less than etc.
@@peacheskong2245 i dont have those kinds of friends. and if that was the energy they were throwing at me then, I would happily show them.the door
@@peacheskong2245 eh no? a person has MANY friends so a friend doesn't really gain precedence over another friend. "Partner" gets prioritized over friends often plus u are supposed to have only one partner so only a partner can really isolate u from your friends.
and women be controlling to. I learned from the mistake of dating a controlling woman. found out she was cheating on me the whole time....
+rahkriga I would agree. They love to sneak into your phone behind your back but get mad when you look in their phone. The truth is controlling women are bullshit and they already be cheating behind our backs. They be trying to cover their own tracks.
@@hess1912 truth
Yes, which is why the title says lover
true gotta listen to judge Lynn she be on point 👌
My ex husband would ask me to cut off my family from my life and when i would contact with them over phone he would ask for screenshots of call logs, to know the call durations, and later started asking me for recordings of those calls.
Shortly after some time i decided to seperate from him to teach him a lesson, and then later realized he would never change. So i filed for divorce.
He was also physically abusive. Injured me a couple of times. Publicly humiliated me on several occasions and made me an outcast to my own social circle and extended family - who i was really close to. Restricting my contact with My family was the last straw he shouldn’t have come for.
I wish for you the best. You did right with divorcing such a person. May god open good doors for you. I hope, you can repair the damage with your family and friends.
@@simpleviewer7445 thank you. I need lots of prayers and good thoughts.
@@kat4691 thank you! I need all the prayers and good wishes.
I see sadness mixed with anger in his eyes.
I see he doesn't like at all what Judge Toler is saying
@@marymeyers6600 because it means he’s the villain. No one likes to be the villain or see that they’ve become something people should avoid.
@@marymeyers6600 where there's sadness, threre's acceptance
Very Very true..I know from personal experience
These words are so true about controlling people..not only in man and woman's relationship but any relationships in life. There are some people who like to have control regardless whether they are wrong. It's their way or the highway ...God's way is not even included in the mist
This is the cold hard truth. I was there in 1998 and it is a horrible situation.
He is look’n All kinds of guilty & Busted!👀 #theGigIsUp
That’s what controlling people do they isolate you 💯👏
She even hit me three times and I lived in fear.
Thank you, i needed to hear this and remind myself.
She is amazing! So true.
Thank you judge for your wisdom you are the best
He’s like “oh oh, she’s on to me” 😂
Girl, let that thing go!
I will say this, this can go either way. Yes, if you love someone you shouldn't think about controlling them or defining who they associate with. However at the same time, if the person you care for does associate with trash people, truly trash people who are toxic in nature and you don't like the company they keep; *LEAVE* That's it. You are the company you keep and if you have garbage friends, they will corrupt you sooner or later and no one in their right mind should ever look at you; a person with trash friends and say "But they're the good one." No. Never. Don't control the person. Be honest and if they value the negative toxic people in their lives, leave them to the friends.
Men and women like this are insidious.. you only notice a pattern after a while when you no longer have friends you use to go out with because your ex use to say 'she said this about me, she said that about me', and you've dumped them. Whilst your ex has made you believe they were making derogatory comments about them and you've felt protective you realise after you've both called it a day that it was them all along..dirty trick but life throws curve balls, you just learn to coordinate them, in tennis if the player has a ball that doesn't have the right bounce it gets bounced right back to the ball girl / boy to be disposed of accordingly🐝Manchester, England
I'm going through this so i can relate thanks for the info
Well said lady! 💁
Look at the way he is looking at the judge. There’s a smile but it’s deadly.
BIG FACTS!💯
I HATE CONTROLLING people‼️
Same here
@@Melly16yr10 . They act like they own you. Don’t know their place.
Tell him, girl!
Put your running shoes on. Judge seen all kinds . Run and don't look back. No regrets
... on point!
I Am Signing My Name Across Her Heart^^
Red flag red shirt 👀
💜. REAL 👑 TALK .💜
So its her friends controlling her or him controlling her?
his face says “shit, my game is exposed”
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Its called narsicistic
this goes for guys/men as well, watch out for those controlling, isolating, fake sympathetic women.
Now what to do when all that starts after you get married. Now you are legally and financially tied.
Divorce is always an option
@@sybelle_esta_no_telhado_ad5040 It technically is an option. But you don't know my family culture. Divorce can be worse for some people.
@@godswillm575 Oh. Anti-divorce culture..?😕
@@sybelle_esta_no_telhado_ad5040 Yes. And if you still go for it, lifelong gift of insults and blame for all of it and gossip,, leading to the person living in either depression or self isolation for pretty much all their life.
@@godswillm575 That is awful!! Although I'm pretty sure in my culture(half Indian), divorce has a similar rep. One of the reasons its highly unlikely I'll ever marry. I'd rather be unhappy single than unhappily married.
He didn't like what the judge had to say. I bet in his head he's thinking "that's why I don't date BW"😂😂😂😂
2021: 852
🎯👏👏👏👏
Your Honor Toler I was married for 5 ugly years. The woman was money hungry which she stole it all. Everything had to be her way or my life was a very bumpy ride. The sex after it can FINALLY happen was even boring.
I hope you're doing better now. I think it's very important for couples to be friends for a good amount of time before they get married so you'll know who they really are.