How Do You Stop Apologizing? / Gaby & Allison

แชร์
ฝัง
  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 552

  • @htz11235
    @htz11235 7 ปีที่แล้ว +172

    In Martial arts we condition people to say "are you okay" or something similar instead of "sorry". It shows concern but doesn't make you feel guilty. I feel it's also good for regular life.

  • @Lizicles1
    @Lizicles1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1034

    The best way I've found is instead of apologizing, say thank you-- 'Sorry I was late' vs 'Thank you for waiting' or Thank you for your patience'

    • @breyes1067
      @breyes1067 7 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      thebionicmom great way to turn that into a positive connotation

    • @aurelijs8891
      @aurelijs8891 7 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Mh, sounds kind of lowering to me, I'm not so sure about it. Whats wrong with apologizing?

    • @ChristinaBentley1
      @ChristinaBentley1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That is so cute! You're so right haha x

    • @cameronhoward7846
      @cameronhoward7846 7 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      thebionicmom "Thank you I spilled hot coffee on you" "Thank you for your dad dying in that bus accident Fred was a real nice guy

    • @nintendoLove777
      @nintendoLove777 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      thebionicmom that and try not to ruin an excuse with an apology

  • @safiyyah113
    @safiyyah113 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1179

    Your seating order is throwing me off

    • @aurelijs8891
      @aurelijs8891 7 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Really? I quite like it!

    • @safiyyah113
      @safiyyah113 7 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Lina Dudak Igor is meant to be just between Allison and Gaby

    • @ailinli
      @ailinli 7 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      I think it's meant to prevent Igor and Gaby from constantly making out.

    • @autumnphillips151
      @autumnphillips151 7 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Actually, um, this is my favorite order for them...

    • @kaylal4926
      @kaylal4926 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Oh my god, I didn't realize this when I was watching it, but I knew something was off and it kept bugging me while I was watching, like an itch at the back of your brain.

  • @mineola_
    @mineola_ 7 ปีที่แล้ว +609

    I live for Allison's gameshows, and am eagerly awaiting the return of would you stay with this cheater!

    • @Parssel
      @Parssel 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Anne --- My favourite game show of hers so far is _Can you fit in it?_ which is from a Party in the Back sketch, but I'm pretty sure Allison wrote it. She gets to be a real (well, almost) game show host in it. She's a natural. (It's on TH-cam. The title is 'Can you fit in it?' (This comment is branded content.))

  • @SelinaSYC
    @SelinaSYC 7 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    How nice it is to have this channel in our life

  • @Andi-vl4sr
    @Andi-vl4sr 7 ปีที่แล้ว +462

    Is it just me, or is Allison strategically in the middle because Igor and Gaby can't stop being sweet with each other? 😆😄😍

    • @kidkool8533
      @kidkool8533 7 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      it could also be a clever Allison ploy to create sexual tension for the audience!

    • @SSJKenpachiZaraki
      @SSJKenpachiZaraki 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I think that it's a clever Allison ploy to throw off the audience because things are out of the usual order. Then there's more comments going WTF WHY IS IT ALL DIFFERENT

    • @anitaelizabeth1228
      @anitaelizabeth1228 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Purple Punk also cause she's the 'host ' posing questions 🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓🤓

    • @Andi-vl4sr
      @Andi-vl4sr 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kid Kool yeah, that's a great theory! 😄

  • @MosquitoBites
    @MosquitoBites 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Just when I though I couldn't love Allison more, the way she says "Could you send me a picture of it later" was the most innocent and cutest thing ever !
    P/s also loving the bangs

  • @melissah4314
    @melissah4314 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I love for Allison yelling at Igor, it's the funniest interaction ever.

  • @Lexicon12
    @Lexicon12 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    How do you guys not have a million viewers yet! Your content is always so awesome and hilarious.

  • @erinpierce83
    @erinpierce83 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    "We're your best friends," was the best line ever.

  • @juliacrowe2765
    @juliacrowe2765 7 ปีที่แล้ว +214

    I apologise all the time and I fucking expect it back! if you walk into me I apologise. JUST FUCKING APOLOGISE!

    • @Realthx
      @Realthx 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      No, only women apologise. And they should apologise less, because they dont do things wrong.
      Allow me to present an obvious case where one woman apologised after someone obviously mistreated her as an example for all cases where women apologise.

    • @lyrrr.8059
      @lyrrr.8059 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      sorry

    • @juliacrowe2765
      @juliacrowe2765 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Luca S. it's okay Luca, I'm sorry too!

    • @Realthx
      @Realthx 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      notice my bad vibes senpai

    • @bernardrouhi451
      @bernardrouhi451 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I Agree, we should always apologize if we do any mistakes and it's polite.

  • @samuelkavanagh7924
    @samuelkavanagh7924 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I like the blazer! Also, I love the fact the Egor basically does a dance whenever he does an accent.

  • @roseswindler
    @roseswindler 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I think my favourite part of this video is when Igor says 'We're your best friends!'
    It made me happy. I Love you guys. ❤

  • @sarahmurray8142
    @sarahmurray8142 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Allison on a brighter note, you did accomplish most of those things. you said yourself that you are more comfortable, and moving from NY to CA is a pretty big deal for a social life. so good for you!!!

  • @grapes3636
    @grapes3636 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Igor is on here justttttt enough. If it was any less, it wouldn't be enough, but if he was on here more, it'd be too much. Good job existing Igor.

  • @aquoslover200
    @aquoslover200 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'VE ONLY RECENTLY DISCOVERED YOUR CHANNEL, I'M DYING I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH OMFG.

  • @catalinaarose
    @catalinaarose 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I read somewhere that you should start replacing sorry with thank you. For example, if you catch yourself close to saying something such as, "sorry for talking to much" you can say thank you for taking your time to listen to me talk. This has helped me lessen how often I say sorry!

  • @Narbaculus
    @Narbaculus 7 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    If Allison is in the middle, does that mean the "us" is now _Gaby and Igor?_
    *Dammit, M. Night!*

    • @kidkool8533
      @kidkool8533 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      and the mystery deepens!

    • @sexyscientist
      @sexyscientist 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Igor seems to have become the primary partner.

    • @kidkool8533
      @kidkool8533 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      no, Allison & Gaby are primary. Igor is a metamour.
      Allison however is having trouble sharing her "toys" with Gaby, and thus the tension within the group.
      O^O

  • @ejniebo6214
    @ejniebo6214 7 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    "can I just say something feminist first"

  • @aleenax2490
    @aleenax2490 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Allison looks like an indie model, love the bangs and the jacket.
    And the video is great as usual

  • @paulisnatis
    @paulisnatis 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    apolozing too much can be a problem especially if you're having problems with mental health. so instead of apologizing you can thank the person like instead of saying "sorry for taking up your time" you can say "thank you for taking time from your day to do 'x' "

  • @marisolblomst
    @marisolblomst 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Alison's scenarios have so many twists, they should hire her to write The Prestige 2.

  • @awkwarddino
    @awkwarddino 7 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Gaby and Igor look like they're about to star in a 21st century version of "Greese".

  • @jolakristin281
    @jolakristin281 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Allisons scenarios are awesome 💕

  • @o0Avalon0o
    @o0Avalon0o 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    The blazer looks good ;-)

  • @peacockin1
    @peacockin1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Sorry for asking, but did Alison ever make it to singles tennis?

  • @dingoesrock130
    @dingoesrock130 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The reminds me of my field hockey coach. She always used to tell us to not say sorry but instead "I'll do better next time"
    because often is sports if you are passing the ball or something and one person messes up (e.g. a bad pass or catch that slows things down or make the other person have to run and get the ball) they will always say sorry but it's unnecessary sense we were are learning and everyone messes up.
    Also field hockey is a primarily female sport in the us so my coach would tell us that as girls we don't need to always be apologizing and acting weak or whatever

    • @kidkool8533
      @kidkool8533 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Tina>I like your coach..

  • @zuzanna6468
    @zuzanna6468 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love how their show is based on answering people's questions and yet they never actually gave a helpful answer

  • @thiavine
    @thiavine 7 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    As a Canadian, if you bump into me I will probably apologize. Sorry.

    • @marvelmaniac6639
      @marvelmaniac6639 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thia Cole same

    • @narutos_ramen
      @narutos_ramen 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      That honestly sounds wonderful, since I have been called a bitch for accidentally bumping into some guy, it rarely happens so I get too shocked to say sorry on time 😂 I was also yelled at by a girl on the bus when I accidentally stepped on her toe and didn't say sorry since I hadn't felt it through my shoe. .-.Now I say sorry lightening quick out of fear and anxiety rather than politeness, which is ironic since isn't it polite to be nice to people in general? 😅

    • @reganmatthews1193
      @reganmatthews1193 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m also Canadian and I apologized when someone closed the door on me😂

  • @caitlind5887
    @caitlind5887 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    "Can I just say something feminist first?"
    My fucking life motto.

  • @FalloutUgglan
    @FalloutUgglan 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    "He's Eurotrash!" Hahaha I can't x'D

  • @summeronmymind
    @summeronmymind 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    just wanna drop a comment letting you guys know that your content is highly appreciated, it's both educational and funny

  • @fireinthedust
    @fireinthedust 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    "You look like a jerk" "Yeah, and we're the best you can do." Love it!

  • @aurelijs8891
    @aurelijs8891 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Allison growing out her bangs looks great! What a fresh look.

  • @gemmaalbin
    @gemmaalbin 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I look forward to these videos every week!

  • @JoDidntHearYou
    @JoDidntHearYou 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I seriously love how you guys are having a great time during your videos. It really shows ❤️

  • @iamsriracha
    @iamsriracha 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love the new format of the videos especially with Igor #keepigor

  • @hatandsocks1
    @hatandsocks1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I spent a year in therapy learning not to apologize and only now do I realize how often I was saying it! Definitely a female thing and a social anxiety thing!

  • @luciel8604
    @luciel8604 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Allison's scenarios are gold

  • @EvaHoHoHo
    @EvaHoHoHo 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I just honestly adore Allison so much.

  • @meghaa6028
    @meghaa6028 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I LIVE FOR GABY'S HAIR

  • @LynxDaemon19
    @LynxDaemon19 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I took a big gulp of water right before "Your name is Sally." "No." and had to pause the video to keep from spewing it all over my keyboard in laughter.

  • @inadw9966
    @inadw9966 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I must admit that at First I didn't like Igor, but now I'm frikin Love him!

  • @jada3417
    @jada3417 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    allison im shook that you're wearing a bomber jacket, all three of your outfits had me in awe

  • @ushmaasher
    @ushmaasher 7 ปีที่แล้ว +136

    The 'likes before watching the video' squad, Where you at?

  • @stevenkoriagin5810
    @stevenkoriagin5810 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    "We're your best friends." lololol

  • @BrEAnNe78952
    @BrEAnNe78952 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    seriously though you guys are amazing!!!

  • @juliettehamelle1747
    @juliettehamelle1747 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I like this dynamic & this was hilarious! There should be a miniseries like "Heavy or Light" of this on one of your instagrams :)

  • @laurageiendorfer7144
    @laurageiendorfer7144 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I live for these videos. Seriously though, they never fail to make me laugh.

  • @honey.nut.qu33rio
    @honey.nut.qu33rio 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    how is allison so effortlessly funny

  • @ameyafutnani4569
    @ameyafutnani4569 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love Igor sooo much omg

  • @acidification
    @acidification 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    2:30 Your name is Sally.. NO!

  • @ThisIsTeeKay
    @ThisIsTeeKay 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    As a Canadian, I needed this episode.

  • @FaithA13
    @FaithA13 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I literally had to stop watching at work coz I was laughing too much and people were looking... Guess I'm watching it on the bus home instead. Also gaby I've been listening to your podcast and I'm OBSESSED it's sickening. I listen every day and I'm scared to finish it coz it's so good. Love from your biggest fan in New Zealand xx

  • @ShaluAloo
    @ShaluAloo 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Allison's bomber jacket is so phresh.

  • @nekawingert4832
    @nekawingert4832 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    God, I love Allison fighting with them

  • @elizabethsmith6477
    @elizabethsmith6477 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    The end of this was great 😂

  • @Troof2powur
    @Troof2powur 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Alison's reaction at 1:49 had me laughing so hard I actually had to go back to hear what Gabby said.

  • @tessb2193
    @tessb2193 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Yay! it's a happy Monday now that this is uploaded

  • @shadyminion
    @shadyminion 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Sometimes you say "I'm sorry" when you really mean "I'm feel sorry for you". So it's not so much as it was my fault but that I wish that hadn't happened. I got fired = I'm sorry - She broke up with me = I'm sorry - They ran out of pie = I'm sorry I know you had your heart set on that.

  • @SuperFreakyTails
    @SuperFreakyTails 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    4:51 I like how the dog slightly turns his head and smiles at the camera when Gaby mentions a pink thong lol

  • @Jhoomers
    @Jhoomers 6 ปีที่แล้ว

    Why did the “your both named Fred” part make me physically scream laugh

  • @MetalPhoenix13
    @MetalPhoenix13 7 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    Here's a question. As a person who suffers from major depressive disorder, do either of you currently have or have ever had or know someone who has or has had some sort of mental illness?How did you deal with it and how should I? That's what I think the next episode should be about.

    • @Realthx
      @Realthx 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      It varies from disorder to disorder and you should be seeking professional help instead of an explanation from a youtuber?

    • @chillysos12
      @chillysos12 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      also Gaby used to suffer from Depression, she has a personal channel called Gaby dunn and theres an old video there where she talks abt it

    • @Anouddw
      @Anouddw 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      MetalPhoenix13 I AGREE. The next episode should be about mental illness. Whether it's (depression, OSD, Anxiety).
      WE NEED IT MORE THAN WANTING IT.

    • @lilpotat0
      @lilpotat0 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      MetalPhoenix13 I have, and honestly the best way is to go a psychotherapist (NOT A PSYCHIATRIST) if you can. I had one that genuinely changed my entire life. People are generally so hesitant to see a therapist, but I promise from experience it works if you are open to it.

    • @TheKelliestKelly
      @TheKelliestKelly 7 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Long comment is about to be long.
      Gaby and especially Allison are pretty vocal about their personal experiences with mental health. Like Chillysos says, Gaby talks about her experience with depression on her channel a while back. She also talks about being on medication in other JBU videos. Allison has severe OCD and has since she was 4 which she brings up fairly often.
      I also deal with major depressive disorder in addition to an anxiety disorder. Like others have said, professional help is the best way to deal with it. I imagine since you use the full name of the illness that you've received a formal diagnosis and that's good! It's a first step to fighting the beast.
      Some types of therapy I've had success with in the past are Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT - I'm less versed in this one). If you don't already have a therapist, you can look into these while you find one. More generally, it can be very difficult to start exercising, but once you do that can be really helpful with mood. It's a gradual thing - not a sudden thing, so unfortunately you can't expect to run for a week and have significantly reduced symptoms.
      Ooh, that's really important to consider - everything is gradual when it comes to treating mental health disorders. It's a process of a learning to cope with symptoms and how to lessen them. I don't know what tools you already have in your coping tool box but it's smart to practice them when you're feeling calm, or really happy, or just generally in a good mood. The reason for this is that if you're only using your coping tools when you're in crisis mode you're not going to be as good at utilizing them. Whereas if you practice when you're in a better mood not only are you more experienced with whatever coping method, you've also built up an association of feeling good and that tool which will help get you out major downswings.
      Mindfulness is also a good thing to look into and something I'm currently learning myself. So yeah, my only other advice given that I don't know anything else about you is that, again, coping with mental illness is a process and you get stronger and you get better. It's also usually a good idea to talk to people.
      Buffering by Hannah Hart discusses a lot of Hannah's experiences with mental health and personally I related to a lot of them and found them very helpful.
      I hope my comment helped at least a little!

  • @Pizzelle
    @Pizzelle 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Allison, your hair looks fabulous!! :)

  • @saltsman3673
    @saltsman3673 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    one day when they're older, allison and igor will be ready for each other and they'll be the perfect couple

  • @ttla72
    @ttla72 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    HAPPY 750k subscribers!!!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

  • @JashanaC
    @JashanaC 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Baha! Allison's "STOP IT" to Igor was hilariously aggressive to me. :D

  • @KiaraRoseWriting
    @KiaraRoseWriting 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm in a new city and I have literally found myself apologising because OTHER PEOPLE are in the way and won't move in the street, instead of saying "excuse me", and it makes me angry at myself every time I do it. Not at the other person or at anyone else, because I didn't grow up in a family that enforced that at all but I DO IT ANYWAY.

  • @audreeaudree
    @audreeaudree 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    the highlight of this video for me was the little shoulder action igor went for as he began his russian accent. (3:00). 10/10

    • @audreeaudree
      @audreeaudree 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      also, m night shyamalan is the m night shyamalan of youtube. allison is the allison of youtube.

  • @ZoeMinaj
    @ZoeMinaj 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love Gaby & Allison's new hurrsssss

  • @laurahav2139
    @laurahav2139 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Allison: "Look at the two of you!!"
    Gaby: "What about it?"
    Igor: "We're your best friends!"
    Allison (covers face in agony): "I *know*"

  • @starjun010
    @starjun010 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Omg this episode is on fleek!!!

  • @MsRMulloy
    @MsRMulloy 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I feel like Allison is sitting in between Igor and Gaby because she was sick of them distracting each other all the time. Like SIT CHILDREN AND BEHAVE. Hehehe 😂

  • @heijeehei
    @heijeehei 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Gaby, your hair looks amazing. Get it girl.

  • @AzmiAb
    @AzmiAb 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Loved this episode all around

  • @pieceoftrash5644
    @pieceoftrash5644 หลายเดือนก่อน

    revisiting this years later bc this feels safe

  • @RachelLotty
    @RachelLotty 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    i love that igor is a part of this now

  • @AcidRainbowSkies
    @AcidRainbowSkies 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    this is the content i subscribed for! 👌👌👌👍💕keep em coming

  • @tayzb5437
    @tayzb5437 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love Allison's hair

  • @purplenatashav
    @purplenatashav 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    you guys are amazing I love you guys so much

  • @TheAkwardOreo
    @TheAkwardOreo 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Allison's bangs look great

  • @fall3nang3l125
    @fall3nang3l125 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I'd like to see more of Igor's accents and impressions

  • @beastboy121212
    @beastboy121212 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Imagine a crossover between My brother my brother and me and just between us!! Two amazing comedy advice shows

  • @michellelandry4146
    @michellelandry4146 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    WOW the card is laminated!! So professional!

  • @prajitdas
    @prajitdas 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is a really funny episode! I like all the twists :P

  • @RoyGibson
    @RoyGibson 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Brilliant episode. Love the change of focus from Alison thong to jacket... BANG.

  • @lucywck1221
    @lucywck1221 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I wait for this eve every week😊❤❤❤

  • @davidcrane1524
    @davidcrane1524 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Igor looks great in that blazer 😉

  • @shaunaaaah
    @shaunaaaah 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    As a Canadian apologising is something of a reflex, I've apologised to objects I've walked into before.

  • @GinnyLurcock
    @GinnyLurcock 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love Igor in the blazer
    (I love Igor full stop)

  • @Robynsonfire
    @Robynsonfire 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Gabbys shirt is great!

  • @bradleysweet793
    @bradleysweet793 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    anyone else expecting Igor to be like really smooth then see him in his V-neck and get really confused about his chest hair?

  • @newkidusa
    @newkidusa 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I wish I could think like Allison. She is so creative!

  • @jessicaperez9404
    @jessicaperez9404 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I loveeeddd that ending! Lol wer ur best friends!!!u chose to be here!!!!lmfaoo

  • @RussellUresti
    @RussellUresti 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Idea: Igor and Gaby film an episode without Allison. The twist is that Allison shows up in the post-credit scene.

  • @warriorwitchwillow
    @warriorwitchwillow 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    I absolutely ADORE Gaby’s shirt!!

  • @kaac808
    @kaac808 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    i paused lorde for this

  • @glemarzen27
    @glemarzen27 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    this was a hilarious and wild ride

  • @letstalk5767
    @letstalk5767 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    Definitely a great episode :D

  • @oOoCassandraSteeloOo
    @oOoCassandraSteeloOo 7 ปีที่แล้ว

    If someone gets hurt in a certain scenario you should apologise. In any other case you probably shouldn't have to.
    But I constantly feel like I'm bothering people, so I apologise for my existence all the time.

    • @kidkool8533
      @kidkool8533 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Don't!
      your existence is Nothing to apologize for....it's a gift we've all been given.