Because of their hypergamous tendencies, women generally mate and date for gain -- and they typically have no qualms about passing over men who are not in a position to provide benefit. However, in every culture on the planet, it is the servant who takes the money. The servant is the one who is paid. One of the most over-looked consequences of hypergamy is the creation of a relational indebtedness that was historically discharged in domestic service. This does not interest most modern women; however, they are also not interested in disabusing themselves of their hypergamous tendencies. As might be expected, this creates problems in the economy of the sexual marketplace. Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: th-cam.com/video/WrXBzQ2HDEQ/w-d-xo.html Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: th-cam.com/channels/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXw.htmljoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #dating #relationship
@@Alexxx492 Any man capable of thinking coherently on a topic for more than about 30 seconds is acutely aware of this point. It's a good one, but it is obvious and should not be taken too far. If children are the ultimate gift a woman can give a man, what purpose does a woman have once her children can walk, talk, and get jobs? Since her childbearing years are when she's quite young, this leaves a good 20-25 years of her life after with no purpose to men or any given man. The answer to this at one time was: She provides *some* upfront value to the man before and during the birth and rearing of children ("bringing something to the table") as a down payment (of sorts) on long term security after she cannot have more children. You will find that the problem many modern men currently have with modern women is women's problem with this concept of bringing something to the table that men want other than their bodies. And you can't have it both ways. "We women can be ruthlessly hypergamous because we make babies, this is right, natural, and good. However, Men's biological drive to impregnant as many women as possible is rude, low-brow, and feral and it must be overcome for everyone's good -- but all we will offer is sex. Forget loyalty, cooperation or obedience!" How does that work? The former has just as many long-term poisonous effects to Human society as the latter would have over the short term. I would even argue that the effects of the former are even MORE insidious because they are so much less obvious and so much harder to reverse in any sort of natural way, -- and we're watching them play out as this video accrues views because of this. Peace out. Not trying to argue. I respectfully offer it that the point just seems as if it should be finer.
@@Alexxx492 The ultimate gift a woman can give is unmitigated loyalty in servitude to her mate. Only after a woman pledges absolutely fealty with the certainty of paternity can children be "the ultimate gift" to a man We're not in an agrarian society where children are necessarily a net benefit anymore, albeit still a worthwhile investment perhaps... But as the saying goes "Mama's baby, Papa's maybe" can be all too accurate these days. IF the children are actually his own, they are more so building blocks on an already solid foundation.
You can also be paid without being in a master slave relationship, if you are self employed. Undoubtedly this is how many women prefer to see it these days. But the self employed person Does not have a permanent relationship with the client. It is subject to end at any time and is essentially mutually exploitative. Marriage is not prostitution because in marriage sex is obligatory regardless of resources and resources are obligatory regardless of sex. They are not a transaction in a healthy traditional marriage. Don't marry someone who thinks sex is a reward for behavior. Its a reward for marrying
@@ForceAlfaF1you and the first guy are wrong bexshde you're operating from a falsr premise. Marriage is not fundamentally for babies, it is for the Gospel. Read Ephesians 5 all the way. Your relationship precedes and postcedes any children
@@cosmictreason2242 Sex is a mutually extension of people’s need for intimacy, which strengthens a couples love, bond and unity. Don’t assume that a man can expect sex by virtue of marriage. And don’t assume that men always want more sex than women.
Love seems to be non-existent in romance. It's transactional. If men want love get a dog and never sigh a business contract with a woman. She's just your turn. Once they get the upper hand, they see you as below them and leave to upgrade again.
@@user-ds1fd2rm4pYes he is. He is very inteligent, knowledgable and has the emotional awareness, unlike posers like Tate. You get all of the valuable concepts explained in a simple way, with real life examples and metaphors.
I wish men and women would listen to him instead of these useless batching each sex podcast. Sadia the psychology and him are really good for both sexes@@MatiKosa
@@stevegaines-vq3bd we have our own bag .. we work and have children too... we are hellva multitaskers... if it doesn't work with you we work around you
I don’t disagree in principle, but I’m not sure that that’s really possible. It is something so deeply ingrained in us from millions of years of evolution, the momentum is not really something that can be stopped.
I burst laughing when just right after his most controversial line in this video about modern relationships being a form of prostitution, he proceeded to say, "if you like what you're hearing..." That was just too funny to watch 🤣🤣
This is my golden rule that has saved me from horrible situations. Idc if she's not cheating or in her mind is being perfectly respectful, if it feels like she is doing the later of both, I'm walking. If she values you, she will do her best to make you feel valued. Go with your gut
Hypergamy doesn't care. The market favours women until they hit the wall. Unless men collectively don't simp nothing will change. And that's not going to happen.
True, but let me tell u , im not gonna sacrifice my earned money and time for a woman that doesnt honestly like me. It just diesnt mKe sense to do that . I need to relax after work not drama fight, disagreement, rejection etc... i rater stay alone then
I don't think he made any claim that there is a solution to this. Men being prepared for this reality can help frame better decisions on their own part. And no. Men will never stop simping. Because there is always one scab that will somehow catch a crumb of pity poontang for doing it.
This why I’ve come to the conclusion that most if not all women suck at hypergamy. If they didn’t, they would understand & accept what you said & “settling” wouldn’t be such a common term. Most men don’t care if women practice hypergamy but if they are to be successful at it, you have to EARN that man & the privileges that come with being with him.
They went from -being great cooks, to moderate cooks, protesting cooks, to cant cook-AT ALL. -No debt, a little debt, to completely insolvent -Virgins, promiscuos, to 100+ bodies -from no children out of wedlock, then maybe had 1, and now have 3+ looking for a husband
I'm 26 and I'm so glad I'm learning this stuff now...don't want to end up destroying my life...Salute to all the men who had to deal with women without this knowledge..must have felt like a landmine 😰
Just gold-diggers do this. A lot of these men only want to date girls who are 10, 15 years youn ger than they are. What did they expect? Would you like to date a woman who is 10, 15 years older than you? Neither do young women. I think these women who date guys who are a lot older expect something in return for their "sacrifice". If I were a man, I would date someone my own age and a little younger tops.
Deep down i knew this at 26 but my idealism got in the way of that. I thought that romantic love was men and women wanting the same things. In time you learn that we kinda use the same flowery words but in real life we mean different things entirely. Trick is to accept this truth and still move about the world optimistically and open to new connection.
The simple fact that asking the question "what do you bring to the table beyond your kitty?" causes all sort of sputtering and pearl-clutching means they've been used to being spoiled for so long they don't think they need to do anything else. if it's just for the kitty, then "the money is on the dresser. now get out."
@@Ezberron i agree....today's females want too much & give too little, if anything at all..& they still complain....there's not enough good men to take advantage of.....
Orion: "So you have a choice ladies, you can either be the boss, or you can get a paycheck. But you can't have it both ways" Western W0men: "Hold my beer!"
We can do both... We work.. pay bills and expect men to hold their weight with the bills as well as the housework... And if men don't understand that we can go our own ways.... In any case I can provide for myself... I dig own my gold.
@@cinnababe53 when men get w/ females.....the man ALWAYS loses money....& now days the women won't even have sex w/ us....unless we pay extra....F-that....lower your prices..!!!
My ex actually wanted to share the financial costs and chores equally, however, that caused a problem when she decided it was time for me to make huge compromises. They want things to be equal but can't even remain attracted in that scenario 😂
@@marriagecausesdivorce7540 we broke up cause I refused the ultimate compromise of using my home equity to move away with her. I already gave way too much and received very little. Never again
I've come to learn that women love lies. It's why probably playboys are so successful despite being immoral. They know they're fat in that dress, yet they want you to lie to them and if you tell the truth, that's not welcome. They love to be in love with ideas of things than things as they are. They know they are weaker, they are less providers, they know the man will do just fine without them yet love the talk about how they're the ones that really run the show and how the house would fall apart without them. And they delude and ensnare their men into believing this over long enough time as well. They call the lie telling "affirmation". Yet, affirmation is about what is real. This is just supporting delusions of grandeur or at the least, pacifying the anxiety that comes with their own self critical nature (more often it's the latter than former). So when it comes to the equality stuff, they love to be stuffed about how everything is equal while the reality is completely divorced from that mental image of theirs. The problem with your ex could simply be solved with you engaging in her delusions and keeping the reality to yourself. Honestly, most relationships are this way. Some to a great extent, some to lesser. I was fortunate enough to see a relationship with someone with whom it was on the lesser end. Though, the biggest thorns would come when it came to intellectual capacity. She just had a hard time reconciling that she was wrong about lapse in her memory. Just because I didn't pay attention to little details of her day she would tell me and forgot about it, she concluded that I had a worse memory than her, which couldn't be farther from the truth and when I got tired of that nonsense I started to keep receipts for proof of events just to point out the bad memory and that really lit a fire under the you know what. The reason was that she misremembered or just forgot about past events and committments and would just tell me "No, I didn't" or "That never happened" or "You never told me this!". I know what I remember 95/100 times.
This is one of your best Doc. Well thought out, well structured, and well delivered. Logical argument all the way through, without inflammatory emotional tone. You are a good model.
That’s kinda the problem a lot of modern women are having nowadays, as the playing fields more equaled out, the average man becomes less attractive as a prospect because they can’t provide more than the woman can provide for themselves. Essentially, women have now ruled out most men as unfit for sexual reproduction. I wonder how this will play out as time progress.
The average family now has 0.78 kids. The size of the average family is 3.18 people. The result is population decline. This has never played out well for any society. Edit: to add, in order to maintain the population as it is even in equal numbers, the average family *must be* more than 4 people + .some to account for random chance of death. People are not replacing themselves anymore out of fear.
@@brianjones9780 people keep complaining about pop decline, but no one also addresses the fact that we have the highest population in the history of mankind. It's not like we are a dying breed on the brink of extinction. We have probably just reached the maximum amount of people required to have functioning societies.
@@XenozillexSome human populations continue to reproduce at high numbers, while some are failing to even reach replacement. I think a similar situation to the american and european mink is happening, as certain invasive species leave their habitats and compete for the same mates as an indigenous species. In this case, the population would (A) either resurge even faster after our western societies collapse and are replaced with other cultures capable of population replacement. (B) Crashes and plateaus as the game of adaptation is played all over again until humans are once again intelligent enough to begin another rapid technological revolution. (One with a better ending, hopefully.) If it all continues to play out the same way as it seems to be going now, one goes extinct as the other takes over.
If a man marries a woman of equal stature (money, ambition) the marriage may start off okay, but will quickly deteriorate once she gets what she wants within the marriage (kids for example). After that, there is little reason for her to service her husband. This happened to me. It also happens with a lot of Hollywood marriages because technically, neither person *needs the other person's resources. They can afford to do it on their own.
Probably she never really liked you in the first place. She only saw you as a "man juice" donor and once you had did the deed, you no longer had any use to her because she never really liked you anyway. She effectively used you. She knew all along she would divorce you once she got her kids and child support. Its a bitter pill to swallow.
When a taken woman looks around and realizes "higher status" men are giving her "interest", it's a slow burn until she sabotages her current relationship. Nature isn't forgiving.
I had a pretty liberal friend and I was pretty conservative. He went down the line of falling for someone and making them independent, all that empowerment stuff, became much more conservative after realising what that does (didn't work out). I started off conservative, both of us even deleted our social media accounts and lived without any of that stuff (the best 2 - 3 years of my damn life and any relationship ever), then I became far more liberal, started to make her less dependent on me and more on herself because "I know she'll love me, she needs to experience being her own person" (highschool sweethearts so i was there for everything alongside her), shortly after that it ended. Me and my other freind talked when the break up happened, I mentioned this aspect, he had concluded before me this was the fool's path and a surefire way to get the relationship ended. The dependency is a big part of lasting relationship. It's a delicate balance between having them wanting and giving it all.
“After that, there is little reason for her to service her husband.” But dude…. If you’re of equal status with her, why is her service necessary? Why should one peer service another? Why would that ever be necessary for a marriage of peers?
@@LtDanhaslegsBecause he’s in the marriage for a different reason that she is. If she gets what she wants and then opts out of the agreement like say, no more sex, thats unfair to him.
My divorce cost everything I had earned up until that point in life. Happened after a catastrophic auto accident, I was left with no assets, homeless while I was relearning to walk
Rent seems to work well when the persons are young and healthy. How about when they are old and frail and no kids..let alone if no money too…like at their death bed. What would be a good solution?
@TravelingFoodBunny consciously save the vast amount of money from 'buying" along with associated service charge over the years for care provision later in life? Spent the time saved on nurturing friendships to provide some of the above along with company. There are no guarantees under the buying approach that the person will be there in later life. Approaching 50% chance they won't in English speaking western countries.
@@TravelingFoodBunny lol, no no no. We are picking our struggle out here. Being broke ain't one of them. For the last 10 years, mens spaces have be saying get and keep your money right.
'Women' s status decreases and a man's status increases as a function of time' Except women don't think that way. For one thing, they believe their SMV remains fixed through life at its highest point of 23 years old, and middle aged single mothers in low paid part time jobs think they're higher status than a childless man in a respectable career of the same age or older. The deulu is off the scale.
Women don’t always think logically in the dynamic of a relationship, they are usually pure emotion. You have to operate from your masculine core in the dynamic so she submits and knows you’re in control and she can feel safe with your leadership.
@@ogbg7128 Yes, I know. That's what women did around me. It doesn't happen any more. Of all the marriages and LTRs of people I know well, I can only think of two where the woman has submitted to her man. In all the others, it's the other way round, and that's the norm here in the UK - it's the woman who's in control in the relationship. It's been like that for generations.
Because it’s actually the money and life that matters. Women don’t actually care how men perceive e their SMV. Eventually amens go down as well. Eventually we all die. No one educated actually cared about this nonsense.
i posted this video on Facebook & said..... this is just another form of prostitution according to the Dr. I'm sure most females won't like this & i of course don't care....
@@bvhiawomen are hypergamous because males hoard resources. If you wanna get rid of hypergamy then share. But that won't happen. So suck it up butter cup 😂
Another problem is that the majority women don't even know how the economic system works. Inflation is making young men to appreciate their money even more, which leads to a lack of desire to be in a relationship since is getting expensive out here. If they take some of their time to learn how the system works, instead of worrying about who can provide the most, they'll definitely increase their chance of spotting a high value man.
Yup, there is only one doctor , lawyer or engeneer in town. That means only a few wemen can have an easy life with thyr man. All the rest need to work hard. That said, most parents espettially daddys, treat thyr daughters like princess and dont tell them how life work. Just brought up with lies after lies. Then when they grow up they all expect to get married with top tier men. 6 figure income men are rare.
That’s why since the 1970s parents have been teaching their daughters to create lives where they can make a decent living for themselves, rather than count on catching one of the few rich men available. That’s a BIG part of the “feminism” that people on platforms like this one keep trashing, and it’s really in men’s interest too. Many women AREN’T holding out for a man who makes a lot of money, but you guys seem to see only the ones who are. Maybe you’re chasing the wrong kind of women!
We have washing machines, dishwashers,clothes dryers , and microwave meals. These used to be the woman's job. So the court system needs to catch up with things that got invented 100+ years ago.
My grandma (born in the 1890s) told me that doing the laundry used to take a whole day. She was saying that modern women don't know how easy they have it.
@@stephanie7572 Women go into college and get taught about what their beliefs should be,whereas it used to be the church. So I assume your grandma was brought up in the church and didn't go to college...so she didn't see her labours as slavery..but part of a partnership.
@@Lbf5677 No college, her first job was in a factory sticking feathers on hats for $2.00 an hour. After she married she was a housewife raising three sons.
Allowing the argument that hypergamy is a natural instinct and therefore to be accepted is precisely equivalent to failing to hold women accountable for their actions. We all have base instincts and desires. The difference is that society demands men to control or even repress these, but women are largely given a free pass, if not outright encouraged to follow their base instincts and desires.
As a woman I agree. I don’t believe in it, if I make a commitment I’m staying with that man and building a life together. There’s always someone better out there. Cherish what you have and pull together as a team.
I’d rather be happy being a servant and getting paid by the man I love wholeheartedly than doing the same for a random man (my boss) by performing meaningless tasks like 95% of the jobs imply. There is no guarantee your marriage will be happy and long-lasting but at least there is hope.
Unwanted sex occurs far more within a marriage than in a brothel. Who wants to be tied to that? We know that hearts can change, most of the times change.
Well put: an equal trade in 30 will not remain an equal trade in 50. As a 50something man, I date increasingly younger women since my early 30s. The reason why I don't buy so called "equal relationships" with women of my age is a simple one. No matter how mature and successful a woman is you still has to pay. And I choose rather to pay for something tangible, namely for youth and beauty. As strange as it may sound, the paycheck a 20something attractive woman expects to get from you is often lower than requirements of a mature and successful woman of the same level of physical attractiveness.
Worse than that their "standards" and annoying habits increase while their sex drive goes the opposite way! I am now 60 something and still date women in their 30s and sometimes 20s (I have kept in good health and shape). A "mature woman of the same level of physical attractiveness", they don't exist. Come on, a good looking 20/30 something will always beat some woman in her 40s/50s. In long marriages a woman generally gives her beauty and commitment when she is young so that the man (who does value relationship equity) will remain with her when he has much better options later in life. That's the reality that all these women who divorce in their 40s are finding out.
It’s a fact. Women don’t share their resources with men. Even when you were sharing your resources, when she overtakes you in salary she’s keeping that for herself, not sharing it with you.
All men pay. The John in the parked car pays a lot lizard. The married man pays his wife with a diamond ring, house, alimony, and child support. In fact, married men pay a lot more than The John. The issue is, women no longer need men now they've jobs and divorce can keep the woman paid but without the headache of the man.
If men actually mated per acceptable loss, it would spell the end of marriage. The short-term loss is nothing compared to the long-term loss. Historically the short-term loss had been the driving factor, but more & more the long-term loss is being considered.
We are already there society already made it clear they don't give a damn about men's issues and we have responded but not participating in the labor force or getting married. I had a friend that killed himself at 30 over pending divorce they absolutely wreck average guys. Women have a major incentive to financially ruin her ex husband. If he's left financially destitute he has almost zero chance of finding a new GF or wife as day to day survival will be a struggle. Sad to say the women of today are punishing the women of the future there is always retribution
People act as if female hypergamy is the norm in human society, but for the overwhelming majority of human history, women weren't choosing at all. Marriage was arranged by families and/or societies, sometimes before the women were even born.
This chap intellectually expresses what many other men have said. I have in mind CGA, Tomasi, Cooper and BB and many others. I'm glad he has done this (on this particular point) because his moderate intellectual style is very persuasive. This means many more people (from the middle ground) will hear and hopefully accept the point that modern dating is akin to prostitution.
You want domestic services? Pay a housekeeper named Juanita and buy a laundry machine, a dishwasher and a microwave. Women's purpose shouldn't be just slaves for men
In short, modern women believe they are the boss, and their money is their money, and your money is their personal ATM machine. They are only loyal to their feelings, not you. There's a high risk they will leave you for a man with more money. The only service you will see with them is the service you receive at the restaurant you take them to, and they won't have anything to do with you if you can't afford to take them to that restaurant. ........gosh, gee? Where do I sign up for this deal?
The relationship between men and women has always been transactional. Men are only referring to it as prostitution now because they are mad they are no longer in control of the transaction. What we had prior to this was literal slavery and these highly moral men who hate prostitution strangely didn't have a problem with slavery tho 🤔
As a man who makes over 100k, i only date non career women. The problem is that even if a woman makes 40k, she still believes she's entitled to half of everything while only contributing a fraction of the combined income. I'd prefer a woman who can hold down the house and support me in other ways. Women who make 100k+? Wouldn't even consider it beyond a hookup. Couldn't imagine the attitude that comes with it.
Most men have exactly the same attitude when they're breadwinners. Society has just told them it's okay for them to be controlling arrogant assholes and so it is completely overlooked. But mens ego and arrogance is a huge reason so many of them are single. Women are beyond tired of their arrogance.
EXACTLY WHY I DIDN'T GET MARRIED. Shordy wants tradition but only when it benefits her. Which is understandable cause we're humans but I'll do the same. Optimize
What's actually happening is that the most educated women are basically dropping out/delaying being in long term relationships, so the cohorts below them are moving into dating the men they woukd date
A solution you alluded to, Dr. Taraban, was for the ladies to, "find your dark horse." Something my mother used to say was quite similar, "find someone to, "join forces with."
@@Alexxx492 Correct. The woman's loyalty, nurturing, and investment over the years is supposed to become,"wife goggles." The fact that she's aged isn't seen by the husband, due to him having her from her youth until old age...
Your videos are always the best💯 I do receive a notification each time you post a new video.. We'll have regrets for things we did not participate in...Investment should always be on any creative man's heart for success in life.
I agree with you and I believe that the secret to financial stability is having the right investment ideas to enable you earn more money, investing with the right expert would free you from modern financial slavery.
Nice one mate!. Regardless of how bad it gets on the economy, I still make over 19k every single week. Thanks to Fergus Waylen for keepin me financially Educated!
Wow. I'm a bit perplexed seeing him been mentioned here also Didn't know he has been good to so many people too this is wonderful, i'm in my fifth trade with him and it has been super.
I've been watching vlogs of a matchmaker in China about Chinese women's absurdly high requirements for their ideal partner while they themselves have very little to offer in a relationship. I'd say your theories work worldwide.
Sure, because of female infanticide, there are not enough women to go around. So, their egos explode, and they want the moon & the stars. No surprise there. It's the same on online dating sites where 4s think they are 9s. A complete joke.
Brilliant analysis! My guess is that you receive lots hate messages from modern women unable to solve this riddle in their mind and seeing their SMV going down everyday.
In Greece until 1985 - it was the law - the father of a bride had to pay the man in order to marry his daughter, clearly a transaction to benefit the groom. The same applied to most european countries. Any useless male could take advantage of a woman in this manner whose wealth was transfered to him, a house most of the time. It was a disgrace.
@@kimilsungthefirst6840 A competent man would not need this kind of payments that meant that only wealthy women could get married regardless of other qualities
I never learnt this when I was a kid, instead I watch my mother and father fight over money issues to a point where it let to a divorce when I was 16. Here I am at age 35 still learning new but basic things.
I've always had these niggling feelings and thoughts in the back of my head but I'm not eloquent enough to put it into words. This guy is speaking truth!!!
Another huge issue with the modern marriage setup is that while there are risks for man leaving a marriage through him losing access to kids, stable family and half of his stuff in addition to alimony and child support, there are no really much risks and incentives for a woman to stay in the marriage as she can get all the provisioning from the same man she divorced for like forever hence they can simply get bored with the marriage and decide to leave.
"I don't know what else to call it but modern prostitution. Now before I go any firther If you're liking what you're hearing please consider sending this episode to someone who might benefit from its message" 😂😂😂
You have logically and fairly engaged with a subject that is fraught with feminist ideology, and sexual politics. Some women will be extremely defensive around these topics and thus most (if not nearly all) men will simply not even engage with such matters. They will often be dismissed as simply misogynistic without any real dispassionate, logical, and fair discussion. I would argue that both sides often do themselves a disservice by lazy, stereotypical arguments. Dr Taraban is not one of them. Well done
Back in the 1990s I was in the Army and also worked a Part time bartending job off of the Post on the weekends when I could. Fridays my day started at 5:00 AM and ended Saturday morning at 2:00 AM. When I arrived home from the bar, I would put my $100 or whatever on the dresser for my wife to buy household supplies, gas, baby clothes, etc. However, she complained that I wasn't getting up at 7:00 AM Saturday to help with the house work. I finally have her an ultimatum: you can keep receiving the money and let me sleep in, or I'll hire someone to come in and clean the house, and give her the money, and I'll sleep in. She took the money.
Good man, same here. I saw early on how rigged and one sided the game of marriage is and decided I would never participate in a lopsided game where I'm guaranteed to lose. I realized quickly that women offered me nothing of value.
_I just subscribed to your channel as a direct result of one the interviews you did with Soft White Underbelly. You are clearly vastly knowledgeable in the topic of intersexual dynamics and your name is as cool as a name gets._
Thanks for the wisdom. I've removed myself from the Western dating market because I'm not looking for prostitution. When I want a relationship the only solution is to look out of country.
As always, you hit the bullseye. The succinctly combined several past videos, so I think I will actually play this for folks next time I get in a convo about hypergamy.
@22448824 she's still in college and very receptive to this stuff. She will do well. She's leagues ahead of her friends in this kind of stuff. But I get what you mean tbh
Remember folks: this is only one way of looking at relationships. The analysis is interesting and does teach us a lot, but only about some facets. For example if we choose to view a relationship not in terms of value exchange, but in terms of adherence to (or departure from) a set of cultural expectations, we get an entirely different set of problems, explanations, and conclusions. We might alternatively view relationships as opportunities to grow together, and take active steps to reduce patterns of thought which focus us on the power dynamics or attribution of value to what is offered or taken. Overall I think it's healthiest to be open to multiple perspectives on them, all at once. This gives us a nuanced view, and an escape from mental traps which may cause unresolvable friction.
It’s annoyingly ignorant when men ask a women for the behaviors befitting the traditional role that they are designed for (cooking, cleaning, child-rearing, supportiveness, cooperation, etc), they all mouth off about them not being a man’s maid/ mother But they don’t mind a man being their “father” (paying bills, providing shelter, protection, food and other resources)… It’s an annoyingly ignorant retort
I actually know few women that wouldn't do all the "womanly" things you listed for a guy that ACTUALLY provides proper food (not a few hundreds / month with bad quality, more like 1.5k min for a family of 4), owns his house (sure, mortgage, not asking paid of), and have extra money for the rest of activities of kids, clothing and so on.
And then there are other women that don't want traditional from him nor her. You're acting as if it's a dichotomy... all trad or all modern. The truth is most of us are somewhere in between
@@runnerelken9751the women listening to him are special cases. It’s better a professional like him says or a woman says it. This is the relationship exchange women have created today. It’s probably because you don’t notice.
I thought this same thing over a woman complaning in hoe_math video about how men are financially equal (literally) and that she and other women wants financially superior men to date yet they can't find such men to satiete themselves. I know she sounds irrational and emotional because you should'nt find superior people when you want strict equality, yet this is a reality for modern women it seems. A net benefit value trade, is uınfair for one of the parties. Therefore this video is so spot on and needed.
Men like women for who they are. Women only like men for what men give them. Even if a man wins the game and becomes a rich CEO, the woman still only likes what she gets from the man, never the man for who he is.
Part of what had made this natural part of the Human Condition much more aggravated is how Consumerist Western Societies have become. We now measure the value of all things in terms of profit, loss, leverage and disadvantage. The more that Humans measure all existential value this way, the more Machiavellian women will openly become....and they are just nasty with this trait already
I have been speaking this for years and appreciate this video i wish more people could fucking be able to accept this bit of wisdom and lessons in life
If by your statement, you mean acceptance that in order to exercise their hypergamous instincts, modern western women must cultivate their traditional femininity and all of the feminine traits that men instinctively seek in women, and accept that the price of the high value men they desire is generous and permanent sex and service-OR-that they must accept that if they are unwilling to provide the sex and service instinctively sought by men in exchange for accepting the losses imposed upon them as they “level up” through the relationship with those men, then they must give up their dreams of having that high value man, and accept being alone, while men need to accept their masculine role, stop apologizing for their masculinity, stop being simps, and embrace their manhood and their natural roles in life, then I agree completely with you, and applaud you for, as you say, speaking this for years.
orion, i have always said this to my friends: what is the difference between a wife and a prostitute ? a wife is a long term prostitution agreement, while the prostitute is a one time deal.
@@divababy4463your opinion of how he’s pathetic for seeing reality doesn’t refute his point he mentioned the only difference one is long term and the other is short term but it’s still a pay to play kind of scenario. If your looking for a provider/protector your looking for a trick because the laws protect women. As well as women constantly gloat about how they can provide for themselves.
There's so much to unpack here. A challenge is that men can see the logic presented here, but men are kinda hardwired to think of relationships in old school ways or men's ability to apply logic to choices is blinded by biological urges to copulate, especially during times that precede their peak SMV. Women might be indifferent to the logic presented and are less likely to adjust their decision making as they more consistently think, dare I say "emotionally" and either overplay their hand in the SMP, or think the heck with the rules as I've got the goods to get everything I want because courts are on my side and men are very gullible.
You misunderstand. They've raised their value. They're ALL 10's now. So they discharged any "debt" owed simply by deigning to be in a relationship with your average billionaire. *Wedges tongue firmly in cheek* I wish I was joking btw.
Would you rather be a “servant” to a “boss” for 8 or 10 hours a day, then come home to a PARTNER-or be a “servant” who lives with your “boss” 24/7? Probably the first one, right? So why would you expect women to choose any differently than you do?
@terry9238 Most women would rather serve the man they are in love with, rather than a boss at a 9-5 job that they have no personal intimate relationship with. If a woman prefers to serve her boss at a job more than her man, then she's not truly in love with that man.
This is perfect logic when referring to sovereign human beings. However, if you introduce an owner/slave dynamic into the picture things change. The slave is obligated to serve the owner with no compensation. If the slave makes money that money also goes to the owner. This is the world we live in today.
@@drinkxyzSex is the bait. Servitude is the goal. Government is the whip. Woman gets the benefits of the master. But she relies on HER master to enforce her status.
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Because of their hypergamous tendencies, women generally mate and date for gain -- and they typically have no qualms about passing over men who are not in a position to provide benefit. However, in every culture on the planet, it is the servant who takes the money. The servant is the one who is paid. One of the most over-looked consequences of hypergamy is the creation of a relational indebtedness that was historically discharged in domestic service. This does not interest most modern women; however, they are also not interested in disabusing themselves of their hypergamous tendencies. As might be expected, this creates problems in the economy of the sexual marketplace.
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#psychology #dating #relationship
@@Alexxx492 Any man capable of thinking coherently on a topic for more than about 30 seconds is acutely aware of this point.
It's a good one, but it is obvious and should not be taken too far.
If children are the ultimate gift a woman can give a man, what purpose does a woman have once her children can walk, talk, and get jobs?
Since her childbearing years are when she's quite young, this leaves a good 20-25 years of her life after with no purpose to men or any given man.
The answer to this at one time was: She provides *some* upfront value to the man before and during the birth and rearing of children ("bringing something to the table") as a down payment (of sorts) on long term security after she cannot have more children.
You will find that the problem many modern men currently have with modern women is women's problem with this concept of bringing something to the table that men want other than their bodies.
And you can't have it both ways.
"We women can be ruthlessly hypergamous because we make babies, this is right, natural, and good.
However, Men's biological drive to impregnant as many women as possible is rude, low-brow, and feral and it must be overcome for everyone's good -- but all we will offer is sex. Forget loyalty, cooperation or obedience!"
How does that work?
The former has just as many long-term poisonous effects to Human society as the latter would have over the short term. I would even argue that the effects of the former are even MORE insidious because they are so much less obvious and so much harder to reverse in any sort of natural way, -- and we're watching them play out as this video accrues views because of this.
Peace out. Not trying to argue. I respectfully offer it that the point just seems as if it should be finer.
@@Alexxx492
The ultimate gift a woman can give is unmitigated loyalty in servitude to her mate. Only after a woman pledges absolutely fealty with the certainty of paternity can children be "the ultimate gift" to a man
We're not in an agrarian society where children are necessarily a net benefit anymore, albeit still a worthwhile investment perhaps...
But as the saying goes "Mama's baby, Papa's maybe" can be all too accurate these days. IF the children are actually his own, they are more so building blocks on an already solid foundation.
You can also be paid without being in a master slave relationship, if you are self employed. Undoubtedly this is how many women prefer to see it these days. But the self employed person Does not have a permanent relationship with the client. It is subject to end at any time and is essentially mutually exploitative.
Marriage is not prostitution because in marriage sex is obligatory regardless of resources and resources are obligatory regardless of sex. They are not a transaction in a healthy traditional marriage. Don't marry someone who thinks sex is a reward for behavior. Its a reward for marrying
@@ForceAlfaF1you and the first guy are wrong bexshde you're operating from a falsr premise. Marriage is not fundamentally for babies, it is for the Gospel. Read Ephesians 5 all the way. Your relationship precedes and postcedes any children
@@cosmictreason2242 Sex is a mutually extension of people’s need for intimacy, which strengthens a couples love, bond and unity. Don’t assume that a man can expect sex by virtue of marriage. And don’t assume that men always want more sex than women.
That was the most clinical and sophisticated way of saying women want to have their cake and eat it too that I have ever heard.🙂
Exactly 💯
And your cake and to eat it too.
Is that why most of them are overweight? From eating all the cake?
@@hyperteleXii 🤣🤣🤣
Love seems to be non-existent in romance. It's transactional. If men want love get a dog and never sigh a business contract with a woman. She's just your turn. Once they get the upper hand, they see you as below them and leave to upgrade again.
This man deserves protection at all costs.
no he doesnt hes no good , just like all of us
@@user-ds1fd2rm4pYes he is. He is very inteligent, knowledgable and has the emotional awareness, unlike posers like Tate. You get all of the valuable concepts explained in a simple way, with real life examples and metaphors.
I wish men and women would listen to him instead of these useless batching each sex podcast. Sadia the psychology and him are really good for both sexes@@MatiKosa
@@user-ds1fd2rm4pdon’t drag him down into your level , it’s an insult to him, no good you
This man is a charlatan.
This is why it's so important for men to stop being simps. Like please have some self respect and don't lower your value just to please women.
Exactly 💯
well said....don't give them cash & respect if it's not earned...
@@stevegaines-vq3bd we have our own bag .. we work and have children too... we are hellva multitaskers... if it doesn't work with you we work around you
I don’t disagree in principle, but I’m not sure that that’s really possible. It is something so deeply ingrained in us from millions of years of evolution, the momentum is not really something that can be stopped.
Which is impossible for most men. When an attractive woman pays some attention to them, they lose all control.
I burst laughing when just right after his most controversial line in this video about modern relationships being a form of prostitution, he proceeded to say, "if you like what you're hearing..." That was just too funny to watch 🤣🤣
I never like what I hear him say, but I do find it useful. I think his tagline needs to change. Lol
😂😂
I really believe that it was unintentional since he says that in all of these videos.
@@mdhazeldineyou like to get intelligence from a messenger of how the opponent is operating, so as a general you build strategy to win.
This time he did not say "every women is a gold digger. Some are just better to hide the shovel."
Any threat to my peace of mind is an unacceptable loss.
This is my golden rule that has saved me from horrible situations. Idc if she's not cheating or in her mind is being perfectly respectful, if it feels like she is doing the later of both, I'm walking. If she values you, she will do her best to make you feel valued. Go with your gut
@@kg8281🙌
Hypergamy doesn't care. The market favours women until they hit the wall. Unless men collectively don't simp nothing will change. And that's not going to happen.
True, but let me tell u , im not gonna sacrifice my earned money and time for a woman that doesnt honestly like me. It just diesnt mKe sense to do that . I need to relax after work not drama fight, disagreement, rejection etc... i rater stay alone then
Simps don’t even understand the concept of what a simp is. They aren’t watching these videos. Unfortunately They will always be out there.
I don't think he made any claim that there is a solution to this.
Men being prepared for this reality can help frame better decisions on their own part.
And no. Men will never stop simping. Because there is always one scab that will somehow catch a crumb of pity poontang for doing it.
Simping is on the decline. Men are waking up and women are already feeling the effects.
We can literally ban simping by law. Paying for OF is already solicitation of a prostitute - it's on the books. Apply the law and fine these men
I do not mind women wanting hypergamy, but I do mind women wanting hypergamy *without working* for it~
This. 💯
Yeah, I'd rather trade with a woman than become her disposable slave.
This why I’ve come to the conclusion that most if not all women suck at hypergamy. If they didn’t, they would understand & accept what you said & “settling” wouldn’t be such a common term. Most men don’t care if women practice hypergamy but if they are to be successful at it, you have to EARN that man & the privileges that come with being with him.
They went from
-being great cooks, to moderate cooks, protesting cooks, to cant cook-AT ALL.
-No debt, a little debt, to completely insolvent
-Virgins, promiscuos, to 100+ bodies
-from no children out of wedlock, then maybe had 1, and now have 3+ looking for a husband
@@kingmelanin7468 Can’t forget the weight issue. Went from skinny to slim to curvy to a few extra pounds to obese
I'm 26 and I'm so glad I'm learning this stuff now...don't want to end up destroying my life...Salute to all the men who had to deal with women without this knowledge..must have felt like a landmine 😰
Just gold-diggers do this. A lot of these men only want to date girls who are 10, 15 years youn ger than they are. What did they expect? Would you like to date a woman who is 10, 15 years older than you? Neither do young women. I think these women who date guys who are a lot older expect something in return for their "sacrifice". If I were a man, I would date someone my own age and a little younger tops.
Deep down i knew this at 26 but my idealism got in the way of that. I thought that romantic love was men and women wanting the same things. In time you learn that we kinda use the same flowery words but in real life we mean different things entirely. Trick is to accept this truth and still move about the world optimistically and open to new connection.
The juice isn’t worth the squeeze is perhaps the best description of modern relationships.
The simple fact that asking the question "what do you bring to the table beyond your kitty?" causes all sort of sputtering and pearl-clutching means they've been used to being spoiled for so long they don't think they need to do anything else. if it's just for the kitty, then "the money is on the dresser. now get out."
@@Ezberron i agree....today's females want too much & give too little, if anything at all..& they still complain....there's not enough good men to take advantage of.....
Orion: "So you have a choice ladies, you can either be the boss, or you can get a paycheck. But you can't have it both ways"
Western W0men: "Hold my beer!"
😂😅
So true...smh.
Technically you can be both….
We can do both... We work.. pay bills and expect men to hold their weight with the bills as well as the housework... And if men don't understand that we can go our own ways.... In any case I can provide for myself... I dig own my gold.
@@cinnababe53 when men get w/ females.....the man ALWAYS loses money....& now days the women won't even have sex w/ us....unless we pay extra....F-that....lower your prices..!!!
My ex actually wanted to share the financial costs and chores equally, however, that caused a problem when she decided it was time for me to make huge compromises.
They want things to be equal but can't even remain attracted in that scenario 😂
The fact you had to make compromises means that it wasn't equal. She was in the employer position.
@@marriagecausesdivorce7540 we broke up cause I refused the ultimate compromise of using my home equity to move away with her. I already gave way too much and received very little. Never again
You should've offered to do half, then hired a woman to come in and do them.
I've come to learn that women love lies. It's why probably playboys are so successful despite being immoral. They know they're fat in that dress, yet they want you to lie to them and if you tell the truth, that's not welcome. They love to be in love with ideas of things than things as they are. They know they are weaker, they are less providers, they know the man will do just fine without them yet love the talk about how they're the ones that really run the show and how the house would fall apart without them. And they delude and ensnare their men into believing this over long enough time as well. They call the lie telling "affirmation". Yet, affirmation is about what is real. This is just supporting delusions of grandeur or at the least, pacifying the anxiety that comes with their own self critical nature (more often it's the latter than former).
So when it comes to the equality stuff, they love to be stuffed about how everything is equal while the reality is completely divorced from that mental image of theirs. The problem with your ex could simply be solved with you engaging in her delusions and keeping the reality to yourself. Honestly, most relationships are this way. Some to a great extent, some to lesser. I was fortunate enough to see a relationship with someone with whom it was on the lesser end. Though, the biggest thorns would come when it came to intellectual capacity. She just had a hard time reconciling that she was wrong about lapse in her memory. Just because I didn't pay attention to little details of her day she would tell me and forgot about it, she concluded that I had a worse memory than her, which couldn't be farther from the truth and when I got tired of that nonsense I started to keep receipts for proof of events just to point out the bad memory and that really lit a fire under the you know what. The reason was that she misremembered or just forgot about past events and committments and would just tell me "No, I didn't" or "That never happened" or "You never told me this!". I know what I remember 95/100 times.
Sounds familiar
Unfortunately, in too many marriages, the man is paying for sex he’s not getting.
Increasing comfort does not a woman's sex drive alight!
Marriage = You've been punked.
This is one of your best Doc.
Well thought out, well structured, and well delivered. Logical argument all the way through, without inflammatory emotional tone. You are a good model.
they will still come after him. and some of those "they's" are men
That’s kinda the problem a lot of modern women are having nowadays, as the playing fields more equaled out, the average man becomes less attractive as a prospect because they can’t provide more than the woman can provide for themselves. Essentially, women have now ruled out most men as unfit for sexual reproduction. I wonder how this will play out as time progress.
The average family now has 0.78 kids. The size of the average family is 3.18 people. The result is population decline. This has never played out well for any society.
Edit: to add, in order to maintain the population as it is even in equal numbers, the average family *must be* more than 4 people + .some to account for random chance of death. People are not replacing themselves anymore out of fear.
@@brianjones9780 people keep complaining about pop decline, but no one also addresses the fact that we have the highest population in the history of mankind. It's not like we are a dying breed on the brink of extinction. We have probably just reached the maximum amount of people required to have functioning societies.
Elites are delighted, the Depop agenda.
@@Xenozillex that makes this a terrible time to be alive. Why not complain about it?
@@XenozillexSome human populations continue to reproduce at high numbers, while some are failing to even reach replacement.
I think a similar situation to the american and european mink is happening, as certain invasive species leave their habitats and compete for the same mates as an indigenous species.
In this case, the population would
(A) either resurge even faster after our western societies collapse and are replaced with other cultures capable of population replacement.
(B) Crashes and plateaus as the game of adaptation is played all over again until humans are once again intelligent enough to begin another rapid technological revolution. (One with a better ending, hopefully.)
If it all continues to play out the same way as it seems to be going now, one goes extinct as the other takes over.
If a man marries a woman of equal stature (money, ambition) the marriage may start off okay, but will quickly deteriorate once she gets what she wants within the marriage (kids for example). After that, there is little reason for her to service her husband. This happened to me. It also happens with a lot of Hollywood marriages because technically, neither person *needs the other person's resources. They can afford to do it on their own.
Probably she never really liked you in the first place. She only saw you as a "man juice" donor and once you had did the deed, you no longer had any use to her because she never really liked you anyway. She effectively used you. She knew all along she would divorce you once she got her kids and child support. Its a bitter pill to swallow.
When a taken woman looks around and realizes "higher status" men are giving her "interest", it's a slow burn until she sabotages her current relationship. Nature isn't forgiving.
I had a pretty liberal friend and I was pretty conservative. He went down the line of falling for someone and making them independent, all that empowerment stuff, became much more conservative after realising what that does (didn't work out). I started off conservative, both of us even deleted our social media accounts and lived without any of that stuff (the best 2 - 3 years of my damn life and any relationship ever), then I became far more liberal, started to make her less dependent on me and more on herself because "I know she'll love me, she needs to experience being her own person" (highschool sweethearts so i was there for everything alongside her), shortly after that it ended. Me and my other freind talked when the break up happened, I mentioned this aspect, he had concluded before me this was the fool's path and a surefire way to get the relationship ended.
The dependency is a big part of lasting relationship. It's a delicate balance between having them wanting and giving it all.
“After that, there is little reason for her to service her husband.”
But dude…. If you’re of equal status with her, why is her service necessary? Why should one peer service another? Why would that ever be necessary for a marriage of peers?
@@LtDanhaslegsBecause he’s in the marriage for a different reason that she is. If she gets what she wants and then opts out of the agreement like say, no more sex, thats unfair to him.
As a 40+ yo educated man living in US, your content is 100% spot-on for the majority of male to female relationships that I have experienced. Cheers!
Are there lots of uneducated people in America?
The cost gets higher while the value of the purchase/hire gets lower
My divorce cost everything I had earned up until that point in life. Happened after a catastrophic auto accident, I was left with no assets, homeless while I was relearning to walk
hope everything is better now
Man, life can be heartless, don't let it be the end.
Sorry to hear, but wouldn't you be left with half the assets if you both divorced?
This is so well said. I wish I would have heard this about 15 years ago. Would have saved me a lot of money 😂
😂😂😂 Me too brother
I think it's cheaper to rent than to buy. This changes the way i view the transaction.
Rent seems to work well when the persons are young and healthy. How about when they are old and frail and no kids..let alone if no money too…like at their death bed. What would be a good solution?
This is why after my first marriage ended, I only date now.
@TravelingFoodBunny consciously save the vast amount of money from 'buying" along with associated service charge over the years for care provision later in life? Spent the time saved on nurturing friendships to provide some of the above along with company. There are no guarantees under the buying approach that the person will be there in later life. Approaching 50% chance they won't in English speaking western countries.
@@TravelingFoodBunny lol, no no no. We are picking our struggle out here. Being broke ain't one of them. For the last 10 years, mens spaces have be saying get and keep your money right.
@@liamo8932 seems like a good strategy. There’s no guarantee that women in non-native English speaking countries will be that much different either 🤣
'Women' s status decreases and a man's status increases as a function of time'
Except women don't think that way. For one thing, they believe their SMV remains fixed through life at its highest point of 23 years old, and middle aged single mothers in low paid part time jobs think they're higher status than a childless man in a respectable career of the same age or older. The deulu is off the scale.
You’re not wrong there. Women don’t really believe that their SMV goes down with time. They actually think that earning more money increases it!!
Women don’t always think logically in the dynamic of a relationship, they are usually pure emotion. You have to operate from your masculine core in the dynamic so she submits and knows you’re in control and she can feel safe with your leadership.
I went out with one such woman yesterday. She is totally delusional.
@@ogbg7128 Yes, I know. That's what women did around me. It doesn't happen any more. Of all the marriages and LTRs of people I know well, I can only think of two where the woman has submitted to her man. In all the others, it's the other way round, and that's the norm here in the UK - it's the woman who's in control in the relationship. It's been like that for generations.
Because it’s actually the money and life that matters. Women don’t actually care how men perceive e their SMV. Eventually amens go down as well. Eventually we all die. No one educated actually cared about this nonsense.
This was the nicest way of a man to prove modern relationships are a kind of prostitution in their basis .. whatever best I heard lately
You beat me to it.
Theyve always kinda been thats why they say prostitution is the worlds oldest profession
i posted this video on Facebook & said.....
this is just another form of prostitution
according to the Dr.
I'm sure most females won't like this & i of course don't care....
@@bvhiawomen are hypergamous because males hoard resources. If you wanna get rid of hypergamy then share. But that won't happen. So suck it up butter cup 😂
Only for average dudes like us. Chad & Tyrone need not worry.
As a middle aged man of limited money and status- I just can’t get excited about middle aged women. So I just stay single.
It's the same for them... they cannot get excited about a limited resources man / poor guy so they also just stay single 🙃
Mate go for younger women. Problem solved.
Don’t worry your not missing anything
Im a high earner middle age woman and I don’t feel attracted by guys on my age and many don’t have the same resources…. I’m happy single 😅
For me the biggest turn-off is when they open their mouth and start talking.
Another problem is that the majority women don't even know how the economic system works.
Inflation is making young men to appreciate their money even more, which leads to a lack of desire to be in a relationship since is getting expensive out here.
If they take some of their time to learn how the system works, instead of worrying about who can provide the most, they'll definitely increase their chance of spotting a high value man.
Yup, there is only one doctor , lawyer or engeneer in town. That means only a few wemen can have an easy life with thyr man. All the rest need to work hard. That said, most parents espettially daddys, treat thyr daughters like princess and dont tell them how life work. Just brought up with lies after lies. Then when they grow up they all expect to get married with top tier men. 6 figure income men are rare.
That’s why since the 1970s parents have been teaching their daughters to create lives where they can make a decent living for themselves, rather than count on catching one of the few rich men available. That’s a BIG part of the “feminism” that people on platforms like this one keep trashing, and it’s really in men’s interest too. Many women AREN’T holding out for a man who makes a lot of money, but you guys seem to see only the ones who are. Maybe you’re chasing the wrong kind of women!
We have washing machines, dishwashers,clothes dryers , and microwave meals. These used to be the woman's job. So the court system needs to catch up with things that got invented 100+ years ago.
My grandma (born in the 1890s) told me that doing the laundry used to take a whole day. She was saying that modern women don't know how easy they have it.
@@stephanie7572
Women go into college and get taught about what their beliefs should be,whereas it used to be the church.
So I assume your grandma was brought up in the church and didn't go to college...so she didn't see her labours as slavery..but part of a partnership.
@@Lbf5677 No college, her first job was in a factory sticking feathers on hats for $2.00 an hour. After she married she was a housewife raising three sons.
All devices for the poor men to pay for and maintain, for tools are the man's responsibility. 😂
@@stephanie7572I am thinking it was probably $2 a day, $2 an hour back then would have been a ridiculous amount of money
Allowing the argument that hypergamy is a natural instinct and therefore to be accepted is precisely equivalent to failing to hold women accountable for their actions. We all have base instincts and desires. The difference is that society demands men to control or even repress these, but women are largely given a free pass, if not outright encouraged to follow their base instincts and desires.
Wow. This is spot on. This should be pinned.
As a woman I agree. I don’t believe in it, if I make a commitment I’m staying with that man and building a life together. There’s always someone better out there. Cherish what you have and pull together as a team.
You're a star; not many people can explain such topics in such a captivating manner as you have been able to do!
I’d rather be happy being a servant and getting paid by the man I love wholeheartedly than doing the same for a random man (my boss) by performing meaningless tasks like 95% of the jobs imply. There is no guarantee your marriage will be happy and long-lasting but at least there is hope.
Yes, when you retire your boss also leaves the picture 😜
Yep than the next day change your mind
Unwanted sex occurs far more within a marriage than in a brothel.
Who wants to be tied to that? We know that hearts can change, most of the times change.
@@nina.cazimi who wants to hav sex with a partner that gained 10kg over christmass
Meaningless tasks? Speak for yourself some of us have meaningful jobs.
Well put: an equal trade in 30 will not remain an equal trade in 50. As a 50something man, I date increasingly younger women since my early 30s. The reason why I don't buy so called "equal relationships" with women of my age is a simple one. No matter how mature and successful a woman is you still has to pay. And I choose rather to pay for something tangible, namely for youth and beauty. As strange as it may sound, the paycheck a 20something attractive woman expects to get from you is often lower than requirements of a mature and successful woman of the same level of physical attractiveness.
Worse than that their "standards" and annoying habits increase while their sex drive goes the opposite way! I am now 60 something and still date women in their 30s and sometimes 20s (I have kept in good health and shape). A "mature woman of the same level of physical attractiveness", they don't exist. Come on, a good looking 20/30 something will always beat some woman in her 40s/50s. In long marriages a woman generally gives her beauty and commitment when she is young so that the man (who does value relationship equity) will remain with her when he has much better options later in life. That's the reality that all these women who divorce in their 40s are finding out.
It’s a fact. Women don’t share their resources with men. Even when you were sharing your resources, when she overtakes you in salary she’s keeping that for herself, not sharing it with you.
Exactly this. As a woman ages and becomes less desirable, her demands and costs ESCALATE. They do not go down.
Boom! Mic drop!
All men pay. The John in the parked car pays a lot lizard. The married man pays his wife with a diamond ring, house, alimony, and child support. In fact, married men pay a lot more than The John. The issue is, women no longer need men now they've jobs and divorce can keep the woman paid but without the headache of the man.
If men actually mated per acceptable loss, it would spell the end of marriage. The short-term loss is nothing compared to the long-term loss. Historically the short-term loss had been the driving factor, but more & more the long-term loss is being considered.
We are already there society already made it clear they don't give a damn about men's issues and we have responded but not participating in the labor force or getting married. I had a friend that killed himself at 30 over pending divorce they absolutely wreck average guys. Women have a major incentive to financially ruin her ex husband. If he's left financially destitute he has almost zero chance of finding a new GF or wife as day to day survival will be a struggle. Sad to say the women of today are punishing the women of the future there is always retribution
@@JoseDiaz-rd9fh
The old ways make sense.
Very neatly explained. It is an issue of double standards. Please put out more videos on modern relationship problems and how to deal with them.
Your joking right? Literally ALL of his videos are about that. About Hypergamy
How to deal with them? DON'T deal with them.
"Them" = modern minded western women.
Almost _all_ the vids he does are related to this.
People act as if female hypergamy is the norm in human society, but for the overwhelming majority of human history, women weren't choosing at all. Marriage was arranged by families and/or societies, sometimes before the women were even born.
Arranged marriages are disgusting
Arranged marriages are still the norm in India - and seem to work out very well for everyone involved.
This chap intellectually expresses what many other men have said. I have in mind CGA, Tomasi, Cooper and BB and many others. I'm glad he has done this (on this particular point) because his moderate intellectual style is very persuasive. This means many more people (from the middle ground) will hear and hopefully accept the point that modern dating is akin to prostitution.
Tomasi is a huge loser...the guy who could never get laid and got crazy bitter...world champion loser.
Dr. OT use a more palatable way for women to swallow the "pill".
Fucking Hell. I never swear but this one takes the cake. Well done, Orion.
"You can either be the boss, or you can get a paycheck. You cant have it both ways."
Damn that hits HARD
Our ancestors got not only domestic services as a reward but also a women's youth and purity. Now we get Chad's used goods.
Oof this is 🎯🎯🎯
You want domestic services? Pay a housekeeper named Juanita and buy a laundry machine, a dishwasher and a microwave. Women's purpose shouldn't be just slaves for men
In short, modern women believe they are the boss, and their money is their money, and your money is their personal ATM machine. They are only loyal to their feelings, not you. There's a high risk they will leave you for a man with more money. The only service you will see with them is the service you receive at the restaurant you take them to, and they won't have anything to do with you if you can't afford to take them to that restaurant. ........gosh, gee? Where do I sign up for this deal?
Facts! When women complain about Cheesecake Factory and demand men make 6 figures how isn’t that pr*stitution?
The relationship between men and women has always been transactional. Men are only referring to it as prostitution now because they are mad they are no longer in control of the transaction. What we had prior to this was literal slavery and these highly moral men who hate prostitution strangely didn't have a problem with slavery tho 🤔
As a man who makes over 100k, i only date non career women. The problem is that even if a woman makes 40k, she still believes she's entitled to half of everything while only contributing a fraction of the combined income. I'd prefer a woman who can hold down the house and support me in other ways. Women who make 100k+? Wouldn't even consider it beyond a hookup. Couldn't imagine the attitude that comes with it.
Most men have exactly the same attitude when they're breadwinners. Society has just told them it's okay for them to be controlling arrogant assholes and so it is completely overlooked. But mens ego and arrogance is a huge reason so many of them are single. Women are beyond tired of their arrogance.
Modern professional women: "My money is my money and your money is our money"
EXACTLY WHY I DIDN'T GET MARRIED. Shordy wants tradition but only when it benefits her. Which is understandable cause we're humans but I'll do the same. Optimize
What's actually happening is that the most educated women are basically dropping out/delaying being in long term relationships, so the cohorts below them are moving into dating the men they woukd date
Women like money and profit. The water is wet. More news at eleven.
😂
I don't think that's always the case, the water at below 32°F is not wet.
It's narcissistic solipsism that makes a woman want to get paid and be the boss.
Love this episode - thanks Dr Taraban, that closing thought about the balance of value changing over time and it's impact on the relationship is huge
It's tough to stay on a path that works for both for 30-40 years.
A solution you alluded to, Dr. Taraban, was for the ladies to, "find your dark horse." Something my mother used to say was quite similar, "find someone to, "join forces with."
Not the issue here. Men nowadays dont want to join forces whit entitled princess.
@@eunanavesani6074 Absolutely not! We're vetting here!
No, he said that as couples age the man's value increases, so even if things start equally they won't end equally
@@Alexxx492 they dont start equally. A womans value is sky hight at 16, 17, 18, 20.
@@Alexxx492 Correct. The woman's loyalty, nurturing, and investment over the years is supposed to become,"wife goggles." The fact that she's aged isn't seen by the husband, due to him having her from her youth until old age...
Your videos are always the best💯 I do receive a notification each time you post a new video.. We'll have regrets for things we did not participate in...Investment should always be on any creative man's heart for success in life.
I agree with you and I believe that the secret to financial stability is having the right investment ideas to enable you earn more money, investing with the right expert would free you from modern financial slavery.
Nice one mate!. Regardless of how bad it gets on the economy, I still make over 19k every single week. Thanks to Fergus Waylen for keepin me financially Educated!
YES!!! That's exactly his name (Fergus Waylen) so many people have recommended highly about him and am just starting with him from Brisbane Australia
Wow. I'm a bit perplexed seeing him been mentioned here also Didn't know he has been good to so many people too this is wonderful, i'm in my fifth trade with him and it has been super.
Though I started with as low as $15,000 actually because it was my first time and it was successful, he's is a great personality in the state
I've been watching vlogs of a matchmaker in China about Chinese women's absurdly high requirements for their ideal partner while they themselves have very little to offer in a relationship. I'd say your theories work worldwide.
Sure, because of female infanticide, there are not enough women to go around. So, their egos explode, and they want the moon & the stars. No surprise there. It's the same on online dating sites where 4s think they are 9s. A complete joke.
Doc, I cannot overstate how much I appreciate the new analogies. These are gold. We do not take them for granted.
Brilliant analysis! My guess is that you receive lots hate messages from modern women unable to solve this riddle in their mind and seeing their SMV going down everyday.
Well, historically brides used to come with a dowry. That system actually lasted until the mid 18th century.
Marriage was seen as a burden to men? You don't say?
Father of the bride pays for the wedding 😆
In Greece until 1985 - it was the law - the father of a bride had to pay the man in order to marry his daughter, clearly a transaction to benefit the groom. The same applied to most european countries. Any useless male could take advantage of a woman in this manner whose wealth was transfered to him, a house most of the time. It was a disgrace.
@@kimilsungthefirst6840 A competent man would not need this kind of payments that meant that only wealthy women could get married regardless of other qualities
Chinas' 1 child policy killed a lot of females. Anybody know why?
As amid-70's male, I can state that my experiences and observations over the years have reflected exactly what you state in this podcast.
I never learnt this when I was a kid, instead I watch my mother and father fight over money issues to a point where it let to a divorce when I was 16.
Here I am at age 35 still learning new but basic things.
I've always had these niggling feelings and thoughts in the back of my head but I'm not eloquent enough to put it into words. This guy is speaking truth!!!
If shes selected for fem in ism, shes opted out of any sort of successful relationship. That is the debt she aquires.
The man can't FIRE the servant without having to give her the money anyway.
🎯🎯🎯
It’s called severance pay. Or, for a longtime employee, a pension.
it's called the house and kids while the 'company' relocates to a shack.@@terry9238
Another huge issue with the modern marriage setup is that while there are risks for man leaving a marriage through him losing access to kids, stable family and half of his stuff in addition to alimony and child support, there are no really much risks and incentives for a woman to stay in the marriage as she can get all the provisioning from the same man she divorced for like forever hence they can simply get bored with the marriage and decide to leave.
"I don't know what else to call it but modern prostitution.
Now before I go any firther If you're liking what you're hearing please consider sending this episode to someone who might benefit from its message"
😂😂😂
😭😭😭😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉😂🎉
🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😭😭
You have logically and fairly engaged with a subject that is fraught with feminist ideology, and sexual politics. Some women will be extremely defensive around these topics and thus most (if not nearly all) men will simply not even engage with such matters. They will often be dismissed as simply misogynistic without any real dispassionate, logical, and fair discussion. I would argue that both sides often do themselves a disservice by lazy, stereotypical arguments. Dr Taraban is not one of them. Well done
And thus there is the rub - women aren't offering the services men want on a level that occured in the past.
Back in the 1990s I was in the Army and also worked a Part time bartending job off of the Post on the weekends when I could. Fridays my day started at 5:00 AM and ended Saturday morning at 2:00 AM.
When I arrived home from the bar, I would put my $100 or whatever on the dresser for my wife to buy household supplies, gas, baby clothes, etc. However, she complained that I wasn't getting up at 7:00 AM Saturday to help with the house work. I finally have her an ultimatum: you can keep receiving the money and let me sleep in, or I'll hire someone to come in and clean the house, and give her the money, and I'll sleep in. She took the money.
THANK YOU. I've been thinking this way for months, believing I was crazy. Good to know that my thought process is grounded in reality.
Expecting women would understand this is naivety.
they will understand loneliness! Men just need to be disciplined and NOT agree to anything unfair!
@@GreatRetro But they will allways get sex!
@@GreatRetro 💯 Gentleman, vote with your love, time, attention, validation, and your d*ck! Not all women are deserving of your gratitude and grace.
What are you talking about? I’m a woman and I understand it fully and easily.
@@GreatRetro Yes, my disappointment in my dating life stems from my expectation that women play fairly.
I made the right choice at 18.....Never Marry. 58 now and life has never been better. I enjoy women....but never take them seriously. 🤣
Good man, same here. I saw early on how rigged and one sided the game of marriage is and decided I would never participate in a lopsided game where I'm guaranteed to lose. I realized quickly that women offered me nothing of value.
_I just subscribed to your channel as a direct result of one the interviews you did with Soft White Underbelly. You are clearly vastly knowledgeable in the topic of intersexual dynamics and your name is as cool as a name gets._
Thanks for the wisdom. I've removed myself from the Western dating market because I'm not looking for prostitution. When I want a relationship the only solution is to look out of country.
As always, you hit the bullseye. The succinctly combined several past videos, so I think I will actually play this for folks next time I get in a convo about hypergamy.
Thank you Dr. Orion! I've sent your videos to my sister in law in the past. I hope she uses them fruitfullly bc they are on point.
What kind of fruit do you hope for?
@@canelareina3795 Poisoned apple 😆
She make excuses to herself then resent you. I speak from experience
@22448824 she's still in college and very receptive to this stuff. She will do well. She's leagues ahead of her friends in this kind of stuff.
But I get what you mean tbh
Dr T this was absolute gold. You're always hitting it hard but the girls won't heed. They will continue to need!
This video is powerfully logical. It's also a rational exploration of women's nature.
Remember folks: this is only one way of looking at relationships. The analysis is interesting and does teach us a lot, but only about some facets. For example if we choose to view a relationship not in terms of value exchange, but in terms of adherence to (or departure from) a set of cultural expectations, we get an entirely different set of problems, explanations, and conclusions. We might alternatively view relationships as opportunities to grow together, and take active steps to reduce patterns of thought which focus us on the power dynamics or attribution of value to what is offered or taken. Overall I think it's healthiest to be open to multiple perspectives on them, all at once. This gives us a nuanced view, and an escape from mental traps which may cause unresolvable friction.
Hear hear!🔔
Good point.
Dude, you give considerable energy to creating these episodes
It’s annoyingly ignorant when men ask a women for the behaviors befitting the traditional role that they are designed for (cooking, cleaning, child-rearing, supportiveness, cooperation, etc), they all mouth off about them not being a man’s maid/ mother
But they don’t mind a man being their “father” (paying bills, providing shelter, protection, food and other resources)…
It’s an annoyingly ignorant retort
I actually know few women that wouldn't do all the "womanly" things you listed for a guy that ACTUALLY provides proper food (not a few hundreds / month with bad quality, more like 1.5k min for a family of 4), owns his house (sure, mortgage, not asking paid of), and have extra money for the rest of activities of kids, clothing and so on.
@MissSaiko What? Fix the typo. Do you mean "little" as in diminutive in stature? Or "little" as in "a few - a small number"?
@blackmanops3749 few. Not an English speaker so sometimes i forget when i write fast. Though it seems obvious but sure, if you wanna stretch it.
And then there are other women that don't want traditional from him nor her. You're acting as if it's a dichotomy... all trad or all modern. The truth is most of us are somewhere in between
This is such a simple presentation that oddly, will create an issue if you present it to the other side.
Nope, totally fine.
@@runnerelken9751the women listening to him are special cases. It’s better a professional like him says or a woman says it. This is the relationship exchange women have created today. It’s probably because you don’t notice.
Orion is saving men from emotional pain and financial loss. Preach Bro!
Everything works out as intended. It just takes a long time with a lot of suffering. Minimising this as best one can is the goal.
I've never hear someone explain modern dating and it's problems so clearly. Thank you
Please post more videos where you break down early or currently reputable feminist ideologies and how they play out in modern dating
This was the clearest and best video you’ve ever made.
"The juice is not worth the squeeze" sums it very well, ask divorcees who have been taken to the cleaners.
You have a very smooth way of telling the truth.
I thought this same thing over a woman complaning in hoe_math video about how men are financially equal (literally) and that she and other women wants financially superior men to date yet they can't find such men to satiete themselves. I know she sounds irrational and emotional because you should'nt find superior people when you want strict equality, yet this is a reality for modern women it seems. A net benefit value trade, is uınfair for one of the parties. Therefore this video is so spot on and needed.
Man is always on point like a decimal!!! Your channel is a treasure trove.
Men like women for who they are. Women only like men for what men give them. Even if a man wins the game and becomes a rich CEO, the woman still only likes what she gets from the man, never the man for who he is.
Part of what had made this natural part of the Human Condition much more aggravated is how Consumerist Western Societies have become.
We now measure the value of all things in terms of profit, loss, leverage and disadvantage.
The more that Humans measure all existential value this way, the more Machiavellian women will openly become....and they are just nasty with this trait already
“Women treat men the way men treat jobs”. This should be a T-shirt.
I have been speaking this for years and appreciate this video i wish more people could fucking be able to accept this bit of wisdom and lessons in life
If by your statement, you mean acceptance that in order to exercise their hypergamous instincts, modern western women must cultivate their traditional femininity and all of the feminine traits that men instinctively seek in women, and accept that the price of the high value men they desire is generous and permanent sex and service-OR-that they must accept that if they are unwilling to provide the sex and service instinctively sought by men in exchange for accepting the losses imposed upon them as they “level up” through the relationship with those men, then they must give up their dreams of having that high value man, and accept being alone, while men need to accept their masculine role, stop apologizing for their masculinity, stop being simps, and embrace their manhood and their natural roles in life, then I agree completely with you, and applaud you for, as you say, speaking this for years.
orion, i have always said this to my friends: what is the difference between a wife and a prostitute ? a wife is a long term prostitution agreement, while the prostitute is a one time deal.
Ironically my uncle is an ex pimp and would agree wit you 😂
How pathetic must your life be that you find a wife synonymous with a prostitute…. disgusting!
Incorrect. What makes a marriage different is that the sex is obligatory regardless of access to financial nevefky. See 1cor7
@@divababy4463your opinion of how he’s pathetic for seeing reality doesn’t refute his point he mentioned the only difference one is long term and the other is short term but it’s still a pay to play kind of scenario. If your looking for a provider/protector your looking for a trick because the laws protect women. As well as women constantly gloat about how they can provide for themselves.
There's so much to unpack here. A challenge is that men can see the logic presented here, but men are kinda hardwired to think of relationships in old school ways or men's ability to apply logic to choices is blinded by biological urges to copulate, especially during times that precede their peak SMV. Women might be indifferent to the logic presented and are less likely to adjust their decision making as they more consistently think, dare I say "emotionally" and either overplay their hand in the SMP, or think the heck with the rules as I've got the goods to get everything I want because courts are on my side and men are very gullible.
Looking back to my own life experiences, you make a lot of sense. Liked and Subscribed.👍👍
Clear, concise, and well stated.
Thank you.
Clearly articulated.
Tough facts for all
This was brilliant and articulate. Thanks for a great presentation!
You misunderstand. They've raised their value. They're ALL 10's now. So they discharged any "debt" owed simply by deigning to be in a relationship with your average billionaire. *Wedges tongue firmly in cheek*
I wish I was joking btw.
A woman making her own money is a servant to her job/boss.
Would you rather be a “servant” to a “boss” for 8 or 10 hours a day, then come home to a PARTNER-or be a “servant” who lives with your “boss” 24/7?
Probably the first one, right? So why would you expect women to choose any differently than you do?
@terry9238 Most women would rather serve the man they are in love with, rather than a boss at a 9-5 job that they have no personal intimate relationship with. If a woman prefers to serve her boss at a job more than her man, then she's not truly in love with that man.
I came to the same conclusion and it’s nice to hear my suspicions confirmed thank you very much young man keep up the good work
I love this channel is tears down the under lying concepts in relationships
This is perfect logic when referring to sovereign human beings. However, if you introduce an owner/slave dynamic into the picture things change. The slave is obligated to serve the owner with no compensation. If the slave makes money that money also goes to the owner. This is the world we live in today.
You're saying the slave is the man in modern marriages and sex is the whip? Interesting
Sex is the bait and family court is the whip
@@drinkxyzSex is the bait. Servitude is the goal. Government is the whip.
Woman gets the benefits of the master. But she relies on HER master to enforce her status.