Hi Tracy 💜 I picked up a few groceries (just 2 items) for a friend who was isolating at home and dropped them by. A few days later I texted her to ask how she was doing. She then asked if I could pick her up some vitamins which we all know are a little more expensive. I didn't want her to assume I would just pay for everything because she is isolating. I wasn't sure how to handle that one. I texted back and said, which kind would you like (generic or higher end) and how much did YOU want to spend? I was happy with what I said. So I dropped them by and she did ask how much and I told her the amount. She didn't have cash right then but I do hope she reimburses me back. It was a good learning for me to not say anything with the chance of feeling resentful. There you were in my ear once again . Coaching is always an amazing process! It never harms but only helps bring clarity! Just love you! 💜💜💜💜
Oh Tracy...when you mentioned "aging parents", I was all ears! I'm the only daughter with 3 brothers...I really feel they think I'm supposed to take care of everything, since I'm the "girl"...and yes, I do usually say "yes". Reading a book now called, "The Best Yes", by Lisa Terkeurst. Great topic...people pleasing, yup, that's me!🤷🏼♀️ Thank you for your wisdom...you are such a smart beauty!🤗
Oh my goodness! At the end of the video I got quite emotional ( actually I cried) not only for realizing the truth behind my fears which comes as pleasing all the time but for the honesty in your words and your body language. I felt as if you were talking to ME. I felt your love and understanding without judgment which is a big thing for me. Thank you 🙏
I had to practice saying no It's so important to just say it..when we say yes to something..you say no to things important. So I just say sorry I have plans. BTW my husband tells me I'm too nice in conversation. When someone says something negative I just be quiet and remove myself. Thank u Tracy.
You rock Tracy. After 16 yrs of turmoil I used my first boundary with my MIL who really disrupts my peace and happiness. She ignored me but with my personal work I’ve learned no response is a response. Thank you for this.
Thank you for this video. You hit the nail on the head when you said that one of the reasons people become people pleasers is that they fear they will not be liked. When I was at school, I became a people pleaser in hopes people would like me and that I would make friends. Instead of making me happy, people pleasing made me exhausted and irritable. You are right about people taking advantage of people pleasers, and that is exactly what happened. Instead of gaining friends and respect, I was taken advantage of until I learned to stop caring what others think of me. Once I woke up, it felt as if I tossed that extra baggage. I believe in being a sweetheart, but boundaries are necessary to be sweet without becoming someone’s bait.
I am the ultimate people pleaser!!! I used to get described as..... ‘precocious’ which is a blow for being an adult woman. I am now turning things around and prioritizing my husband and I. My own happiness has improved greatly! P.S. I do not really say ‘no’ because in this day in time, it’s not really enough. I generally stay silent and do what I wanted: no answer, just action haha
I see you as my mother because you taught me that my parents didn't teach me neither schools teach, sometimes biological mothers are absent in spirit and it applies to even father.
This video reminded me of how I used to be, saying yes and being a people pleaser. Still catch myself saying yes sometimes and fighting the gremlin but I am grateful for all the knowledge that now have and I correct myself straight away. Another great video, thank you.
I don't think it was a coincidence that I stumbled upon your channel one day ... I think God put you directly in my path because Tracy ... this is some GOOD STUFF 🔥🔥 THANK YOU 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Thank you Tracy for all you do. These videos have really ministered to me and have been life changing. Thank you again and keep up the good work. God bless
Tracy I’m really guilty of this with work. I panic if I don’t get back to people ASAP that they will go elsewhere. I’m starting to manage due to watching and learning from you but it’s tough. Thank you for this video x
Love this! I’d love to see one on acceptance approval. Always needing to feel accepted by others to feel worthy and feeling like you did something wrong if you don’t get it.
I used to be a HUGE people pleaser as a teen! It took me moving out of my parents house for me to finally let go of some of these people pleasing tactics. I had to take care of the house and my siblings as a third parent and if I would have objected, I would have gotten in trouble. It really messed me up for a while. I'm sure someone here can relate!
“Does this serve me?” - I will ask myself this question before I respond to anyone in future. Really timely, as I have just come across someone who is really trying to break down my boundaries. She literally keeps turning up on my doorstep expecting me to drop everything for her and go for a walk when it suits her schedule, when she is with a millionaire sugar daddy and has no job or anything/anyone to take care of. Just the title of your video (before I even watched it) helped me to respond to her last time where I stated my availability, instead of fitting my day around her which did not suit my busy schedule at all. She disappeared (for now). 🙏😂 Thanks, Tracy! I really need to keep working on having strong boundaries!
Powerful video, Tracy! The few people who have been sweethearts in my life seem to be incredibly understanding people rather than judgmental. They’re no pushover though!
Oh my God Tracy!!! I always tell you how timely your messages come to me, but this is the top one! I am a people pleaser, however I have been working on it and making some progress. And it is certainly NOT serving me in quite many areas of my life. I believe the 1st step is recognizing that it is happening, why, and then proceeding to correct it. Thank you SO much! God bless you.
Same here! I’m working on having strong boundaries (I’m a empath) and saw the title of this video and drew the line confidently in the sand when it came to someone who constantly pestered me and expected me to cater to her needs and wishes and fit my super busy day around her, yet she does not work an is living with a millionaire sugar daddy. It didn’t make me popular, but I don’t care! 😂 Feel so much better for it! 🙏
This is on point! I have no problem saying no to people. No no no no no! My fave word lol. In fact, I'm currently looking for another job because of this. My workplace is chronically understaffed and I often come in early and stay late for the patients' sake. I can't quit until I have something else lined up, but MAN when that day comes! I will be singing the beautiful melodies of noooooo lol!
Wow!! All my life I’ve been this pleaser person. The part that struck my cord was “are you mad at your nail tech for saying no?” Thanks for another insightful video.
Tracy this was a very powerful video. What made it so powerful for me, is that this is ME! I was saying to myself, Wow, the whole time you spoke. It’s amazing how God speaks to me through women as yourself, and I’m so thankful for that. I needed this! Thank you so much! God is using you in so many ways to help others 😊
Hard video, hard words to hear but so necessary. I listen to your videos and with this video i feel i have so much shortcomings. Would love to have sessions with you. Just too expensive for a foreigner. Really an eye opener video, though!
What a great video! My 14 year old son is a people pleaser and he was in the clutches of a super narcissistic manipulative friend that we had to cut ties with. How can I help my son be more confident? I know he’s had a great upbringing and we are a tight knit family and my husband and I have always been loving and present but man this teenage years are hard!
I have been through hell with a covert narcissist a couple of years ago. Would be happy to recommend a couple of my favourite books/audiobooks if you are interested. I have about 30. But could narrow the best ones, that helped me the most, down to 2-3. Please check out Dr. Ramani on TH-cam if you haven’t already done so. She is a professor of psychology and specialising in treating people with NPD, but mostly treating their victims, as narcissists cannot be changed and they will never admit that they have a problem. It is always someone else’s fault.
You're Doing A Good Job And You're Right Tracy And I Feeling Someone Are About These Peoples Are Nice, Obvious And Friendly And Other Way Are Disruptives For Some Peoples Are Abuse Me And Messing With Me And I'm Autism Persons
Thank you for this video, Tracy. I'd like to know how to deal with family and friends not being there for someone who lost their mama. Friends and family didn't check on her, sit with her, or acknowledge the days ahead of pure frief and pain and she is hurt. She thought her husband's family of all the ppl would've been there.
Hi Andrea! I am sorry to hear that this person is grieving without the support she needs. I would have to know more about the relationship involved to direct you in how to 'deal' with family and friends, as well as explore what 'deal' means for you. Typically people have their reasons for not being present for someone, even during difficult times. And most often both sides have a story. This would need to be explored through a session.
Yes. I also think it’s addictive to get the adrenaline rush of feeling needed or important when you get that last minute “urgent” call! Do SAHM/homeschool Moms feel this pressure to please more? Do they get more requests from family, church, and friends? I listened to this and realized that I’m on my fourth “yes” that should’ve been a no this month. My superwoman cape is in tatters now. Humility is a good thing. Thank you!
Great video Tracy!! So much of this resonated with me although I don’t feel my fear is that of not being liked. I have pretty thick skin in that regard. Not sure what other fears/motivations could be behind my people pleasing tendencies. Could it have been a learned behavior from parent models growing up? Suppose I should start saving for a coaching session huh? hahahaha
Hi Lauren! Thanks for sharing! We could certainly explore that in coaching - Only if it weren't serving you. If all is well at how you show up .... keep up the great work.
Same here. I’m a people pleaser but my “motivation” is not the fear a not being liked. I’m so done with it. I ended up with severe burnout. Now anyone who doesn’t respect my boundaries time and time again gets cut out of my life. You are probably an empath like me. Likes to give and take care of other people’s needs and always put yourself last on your priority list. Not so good at asking for help or accepting help from others. I’m also an introvert. I just want peace and quiet. 😁 Empaths need alone time to recharge. ☺️
Ok I have a question? For example I can said no to people I barely know, but I can’t said no to my friends or people who know me and I want to know why is that?
Hi Tracy, Thanks for your videos! I am considering having the HALO treatment, I have until the 30th to decide, which is soon, to receive the discounted price (-$500 off) . Would you recommend it? Thanks!
Hi Betsy! I wish I could help, but without knowing what you're expecting from the HALO and where you're coming from and age, I would not be able to give a fair recommendation.
I had a good experience. You may want to watch my video where I go over my experience. As for results - Because you can't visually see collagen, the true test is how I look overtime. My skin does and face does look younger than other women my age and I believe it is from these collagen stimulating procedures, as well as a healthy lifestyle, vitamins, staying hydrated and an aggressive anti-aging skincare routine. I am a good candidate for treatments such as this. If a person is looking for a wow-factor, they will not get it from med-spa lasers and treatments. They will need fillers and a treatments that can only be done with a plastic surgeon.These med spa lasers and treatments are for those women who put the work in at home with lifestyle and optimal self-care and know that they are preserving their skin for later years by stimulating collagen.
Wow, you really are fortunate to perceive people as "nice". I can only imagine you lived a trauma free life to have that perception, which i congratulate you for, or maybe you live in a very civilized society. When I think about people in general, the word "nice"doesn't come to my mind :)
Thank you. Yes, 'like' attracts 'like'. If you put out nice, nice will come back. If you put out ugly, victim thinking, it would make sense that ugly, victim-thinking would return. No ones life is trauma-free. The wise know better, and don't expect to sail through life without it. Resilience
@@TracyHensel thank you. That's definitely something to consider. From what i've seen nice people are many times taken advantage of . Maybe you could elaborate on what being nice actually means, because some people my mistake it with being weak or people pleasers.
What is your opinion of cosmetic surgery and/or face fillers and hair extensions as a way of people pleasing and acceptance? I’m curious. I’m conflicted about my opinion on this. I would love to have fillers done but I feel like I’d be betraying myself in order to be accepted by others. I can say no to others and own my responsibility and set boundaries with others but what about boundaries with myself? Maybe I should book a Session with you.
Hi! I wouldn't recommend cosmetic surgery, filler or hair extensions as a way to please others, as it's impossible to deliver in that. This could really backfire, as not all 'people' find cosmetic surgery, fillers or hair extensions pleasing. Acceptance goes the same way. We only know ourselves, not others. We do things because it interests us or we find value or personal pleasure in it. I strongly feel a person coming from this lens of changing something aesthetically because they think everyone would be please, would benefit greatly from coaching. This is very destructive thinking and most likely would show up in other areas. Often we would find heavy low self-esteem and comparing oneself to others. I hope this helps.
This used to be me , especially with my Mother-n-law , I was always trying to please her and my husband once said you’re never going to please her because she loves to b itch.
For me, it was deciding I did not care if it made people mad when I said “No”. That was very empowering. Try saying no to someone’s request (which doesn’t serve you) and tolerate whatever discomfort follows. That person will get over it, and you will have grown stronger.
@@ltg102 YES - I did just that, but felt awful afterwards for several days. At our next committee meeting it became apparent that my response made sense. You know, being in pandemic isolation has not been good for me (an introvert), it takes alot of my energy to speak to a group these days!
Wow, wow, wow. What a powerful video. I thought the classy lady series was top notch but this one hits deep and is so necessary for EVERYONE to hear.
Thank you! I appreciate it!
Hi Tracy 💜 I picked up a few groceries (just 2 items) for a friend who was isolating at home and dropped them by. A few days later I texted her to ask how she was doing. She then asked if I could pick her up some vitamins which we all know are a little more expensive. I didn't want her to assume I would just pay for everything because she is isolating. I wasn't sure how to handle that one. I texted back and said, which kind would you like (generic or higher end) and how much did YOU want to spend? I was happy with what I said. So I dropped them by and she did ask how much and I told her the amount. She didn't have cash right then but I do hope she reimburses me back. It was a good learning for me to not say anything with the chance of feeling resentful. There you were in my ear once again . Coaching is always an amazing process! It never harms but only helps bring clarity! Just love you! 💜💜💜💜
Hi Laura! Thank you for sharing . Love how you handled the situation. I hope she pays you back, as well.
Oh Tracy...when you mentioned "aging parents", I was all ears! I'm the only daughter with 3 brothers...I really feel they think I'm supposed to take care of everything, since I'm the "girl"...and yes, I do usually say "yes". Reading a book now called, "The Best Yes", by Lisa Terkeurst. Great topic...people pleasing, yup, that's me!🤷🏼♀️ Thank you for your wisdom...you are such a smart beauty!🤗
Oh my goodness! At the end of the video I got quite emotional ( actually I cried) not only for realizing the truth behind my fears which comes as pleasing all the time but for the honesty in your words and your body language.
I felt as if you were talking to ME. I felt your love and understanding without judgment which is a big thing for me.
Thank you 🙏
I had to practice saying no
It's so important to just say it..when we say yes to something..you say no to things important. So I just say sorry I have plans. BTW my husband tells me I'm too nice in conversation. When someone says something negative I just be quiet and remove myself. Thank u Tracy.
Perfect timing as someone had just texted before I started viewing and that person asked me to do something I didn’t want to do.
You rock Tracy. After 16 yrs of turmoil I used my first boundary with my MIL who really disrupts my peace and happiness. She ignored me but with my personal work I’ve learned no response is a response. Thank you for this.
Thank you for this video. You hit the nail on the head when you said that one of the reasons people become people pleasers is that they fear they will not be liked. When I was at school, I became a people pleaser in hopes people would like me and that I would make friends. Instead of making me happy, people pleasing made me exhausted and irritable. You are right about people taking advantage of people pleasers, and that is exactly what happened. Instead of gaining friends and respect, I was taken advantage of until I learned to stop caring what others think of me. Once I woke up, it felt as if I tossed that extra baggage. I believe in being a sweetheart, but boundaries are necessary to be sweet without becoming someone’s bait.
Thanks for sharing! Great message!
I am the ultimate people pleaser!!! I used to get described as..... ‘precocious’ which is a blow for being an adult woman. I am now turning things around and prioritizing my husband and I. My own happiness has improved greatly!
P.S. I do not really say ‘no’ because in this day in time, it’s not really enough. I generally stay silent and do what I wanted: no answer, just action haha
I see you as my mother because you taught me that my parents didn't teach me neither schools teach, sometimes biological mothers are absent in spirit and it applies to even father.
This video reminded me of how I used to be, saying yes and being a people pleaser. Still catch myself saying yes sometimes and fighting the gremlin but I am grateful for all the knowledge that now have and I correct myself straight away. Another great video, thank you.
I don't think it was a coincidence that I stumbled upon your channel one day ... I think God put you directly in my path because Tracy ... this is some GOOD STUFF 🔥🔥 THANK YOU 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Thank you Tracy for all you do. These videos have really ministered to me and have been life changing. Thank you again and keep up the good work. God bless
Tracy I’m really guilty of this with work. I panic if I don’t get back to people ASAP that they will go elsewhere. I’m starting to manage due to watching and learning from you but it’s tough. Thank you for this video x
Love this! I’d love to see one on acceptance approval. Always needing to feel accepted by others to feel worthy and feeling like you did something wrong if you don’t get it.
I used to be a HUGE people pleaser as a teen! It took me moving out of my parents house for me to finally let go of some of these people pleasing tactics. I had to take care of the house and my siblings as a third parent and if I would have objected, I would have gotten in trouble. It really messed me up for a while. I'm sure someone here can relate!
“Does this serve me?” - I will ask myself this question before I respond to anyone in future. Really timely, as I have just come across someone who is really trying to break down my boundaries. She literally keeps turning up on my doorstep expecting me to drop everything for her and go for a walk when it suits her schedule, when she is with a millionaire sugar daddy and has no job or anything/anyone to take care of. Just the title of your video (before I even watched it) helped me to respond to her last time where I stated my availability, instead of fitting my day around her which did not suit my busy schedule at all. She disappeared (for now). 🙏😂 Thanks, Tracy! I really need to keep working on having strong boundaries!
Powerful video, Tracy! The few people who have been sweethearts in my life seem to be incredibly understanding people rather than judgmental. They’re no pushover though!
love listening to Tracy, she is such an excellent speaker... ❤️
Thank you!
Oh my God Tracy!!! I always tell you how timely your messages come to me, but this is the top one! I am a people pleaser, however I have been working on it and making some progress. And it is certainly NOT serving me in quite many areas of my life. I believe the 1st step is recognizing that it is happening, why, and then proceeding to correct it. Thank you SO much! God bless you.
Same here! I’m working on having strong boundaries (I’m a empath) and saw the title of this video and drew the line confidently in the sand when it came to someone who constantly pestered me and expected me to cater to her needs and wishes and fit my super busy day around her, yet she does not work an is living with a millionaire sugar daddy. It didn’t make me popular, but I don’t care! 😂 Feel so much better for it! 🙏
Tracy, this is awesome. I watched it 3x and felt like I got therapy. 😆Love your content, very useful and wise!! Thank you!!❤️❤️
This is on point! I have no problem saying no to people. No no no no no! My fave word lol. In fact, I'm currently looking for another job because of this. My workplace is chronically understaffed and I often come in early and stay late for the patients' sake. I can't quit until I have something else lined up, but MAN when that day comes! I will be singing the beautiful melodies of noooooo lol!
Of all the videos I have watched on YT for several years now ....this one...this ONE is a game changer. Thank you’n. You have just changed a life.
Just gotta say God bless you for your wisdom words and comfort !!
Tracy, you were talking to ME in this video. Thank you for another great one xx
Thank you for posting on this topic - I needed to hear this
Wow!! All my life I’ve been this pleaser person. The part that struck my cord was “are you mad at your nail tech for saying no?” Thanks for another insightful video.
Wow! Those last minutes were so powerful! Thank you so much Tracy! You are amazing ❤️
You are a great speaker, I loved this 💕
Congrats dear Tracy Hensel, I wish you a wonderful week ahead with joy, prosperity, peace and health.💐
Thank you!
Tracy this was a very powerful video. What made it so powerful for me, is that this is ME! I was saying to myself, Wow, the whole time you spoke. It’s amazing how God speaks to me through women as yourself, and I’m so thankful for that. I needed this! Thank you so much! God is using you in so many ways to help others 😊
When you talk about your inner gremlin it reminds me of the book ‘the chimp paradox’ would highly recommend it x
Excellent video. Thank you.
The bitter truth about ur videos is .... that you are right ... and u no truth hurts..right .. and to the T ...love ..love ur videos
Thank you!
Happy Monday Everyone
Hard video, hard words to hear but so necessary. I listen to your videos and with this video i feel i have so much shortcomings. Would love to have sessions with you. Just too expensive for a foreigner.
Really an eye opener video, though!
Your videos are amazing I wish I had found you years ago
What a great video! My 14 year old son is a people pleaser and he was in the clutches of a super narcissistic manipulative friend that we had to cut ties with. How can I help my son be more confident? I know he’s had a great upbringing and we are a tight knit family and my husband and I have always been loving and present but man this teenage years are hard!
Great video, so helpful!!!
As always, on point! Thanks Tracy....
That was incredible and hit home way too much.
Thank you. Perfect timing.
Thank you so much Tracy,
Thank you, dear Tracy. ❤️
Good evening Tracy, could you please do a video about narcissists? I’d be intrigued to hear more.
I have been through hell with a covert narcissist a couple of years ago. Would be happy to recommend a couple of my favourite books/audiobooks if you are interested. I have about 30. But could narrow the best ones, that helped me the most, down to 2-3. Please check out Dr. Ramani on TH-cam if you haven’t already done so. She is a professor of psychology and specialising in treating people with NPD, but mostly treating their victims, as narcissists cannot be changed and they will never admit that they have a problem. It is always someone else’s fault.
Outstanding Great Video Tracy Wow
I'm 63 years old. Took me a very long time to learn that NO is a complete sentence.
You're Doing A Good Job And You're Right Tracy And I Feeling Someone Are About These Peoples Are Nice, Obvious And Friendly And Other Way Are Disruptives For Some Peoples Are Abuse Me And Messing With Me And I'm Autism Persons
Thank you for sharing and you loyal viewing. I appreciate it! Have a Beautiful & Blessed Monday!
Thank You @@TracyHensel And I Know How You Feel
Thank you for this video, Tracy. I'd like to know how to deal with family and friends not being there for someone who lost their mama. Friends and family didn't check on her, sit with her, or acknowledge the days ahead of pure frief and pain and she is hurt. She thought her husband's family of all the ppl would've been there.
Hi Andrea! I am sorry to hear that this person is grieving without the support she needs. I would have to know more about the relationship involved to direct you in how to 'deal' with family and friends, as well as explore what 'deal' means for you. Typically people have their reasons for not being present for someone, even during difficult times. And most often both sides have a story. This would need to be explored through a session.
Interesting, very interesting 🤓🤓🤓
Excellent video
Thank you!
Yes. I also think it’s addictive to get the adrenaline rush of feeling needed or important when you get that last minute “urgent” call! Do SAHM/homeschool Moms feel this pressure to please more? Do they get more requests from family, church, and friends? I listened to this and realized that I’m on my fourth “yes” that should’ve been a no this month. My superwoman cape is in tatters now. Humility is a good thing. Thank you!
Tracy, wow! I can relate!
Very interesting.....👍👌
I’m still watching ur video half way done ..but had to comment lol
Love 💘 this!!🙏💞
Great video Tracy!! So much of this resonated with me although I don’t feel my fear is that of not being liked. I have pretty thick skin in that regard. Not sure what other fears/motivations could be behind my people pleasing tendencies. Could it have been a learned behavior from parent models growing up?
Suppose I should start saving for a coaching session huh? hahahaha
Hi Lauren! Thanks for sharing! We could certainly explore that in coaching - Only if it weren't serving you. If all is well at how you show up .... keep up the great work.
Great distinction and a good reminder not to judge it prematurely, thank you!
Same here. I’m a people pleaser but my “motivation” is not the fear a not being liked. I’m so done with it. I ended up with severe burnout. Now anyone who doesn’t respect my boundaries time and time again gets cut out of my life.
You are probably an empath like me. Likes to give and take care of other people’s needs and always put yourself last on your priority list. Not so good at asking for help or accepting help from others. I’m also an introvert. I just want peace and quiet. 😁 Empaths need alone time to recharge. ☺️
In German they say Ich habe keine Worte 😶
It means I have no words You describe me to the t.
Ich auch :)
You’re looking straight through me in this video 😟😆😩
I didn’t know that I was a people pleaser until I started therapy
Ok I have a question? For example I can said no to people I barely know, but I can’t said no to my friends or people who know me and I want to know why is that?
Let's work together and uncover why.
Hi Tracy, Thanks for your videos! I am considering having the HALO treatment, I have until the 30th to decide, which is soon, to receive the discounted price (-$500 off) . Would you recommend it? Thanks!
Hi Betsy! I wish I could help, but without knowing what you're expecting from the HALO and where you're coming from and age, I would not be able to give a fair recommendation.
@@TracyHensel I understand. i was just wondering what "your" experience was like and did "you" have a good result for YOU? Thank you! :)
I had a good experience. You may want to watch my video where I go over my experience. As for results - Because you can't visually see collagen, the true test is how I look overtime. My skin does and face does look younger than other women my age and I believe it is from these collagen stimulating procedures, as well as a healthy lifestyle, vitamins, staying hydrated and an aggressive anti-aging skincare routine. I am a good candidate for treatments such as this. If a person is looking for a wow-factor, they will not get it from med-spa lasers and treatments. They will need fillers and a treatments that can only be done with a plastic surgeon.These med spa lasers and treatments are for those women who put the work in at home with lifestyle and optimal self-care and know that they are preserving their skin for later years by stimulating collagen.
@@TracyHensel Thank you so very much!
Wow, you really are fortunate to perceive people as "nice". I can only imagine you lived a trauma free life to have that perception, which i congratulate you for, or maybe you live in a very civilized society. When I think about people in general, the word "nice"doesn't come to my mind :)
Thank you. Yes, 'like' attracts 'like'. If you put out nice, nice will come back. If you put out ugly, victim thinking, it would make sense that ugly, victim-thinking would return. No ones life is trauma-free. The wise know better, and don't expect to sail through life without it. Resilience
@@TracyHensel thank you. That's definitely something to consider. From what i've seen nice people are many times taken advantage of . Maybe you could elaborate on what being nice actually means, because some people my mistake it with being weak or people pleasers.
What is your opinion of cosmetic surgery and/or face fillers and hair extensions as a way of people pleasing and acceptance? I’m curious. I’m conflicted about my opinion on this. I would love to have fillers done but I feel like I’d be betraying myself in order to be accepted by others. I can say no to others and own my responsibility and set boundaries with others but what about boundaries with myself? Maybe I should book a Session with you.
Hi! I wouldn't recommend cosmetic surgery, filler or hair extensions as a way to please others, as it's impossible to deliver in that. This could really backfire, as not all 'people' find cosmetic surgery, fillers or hair extensions pleasing. Acceptance goes the same way. We only know ourselves, not others. We do things because it interests us or we find value or personal pleasure in it. I strongly feel a person coming from this lens of changing something aesthetically because they think everyone would be please, would benefit greatly from coaching. This is very destructive thinking and most likely would show up in other areas. Often we would find heavy low self-esteem and comparing oneself to others. I hope this helps.
@@TracyHensel Great response! 💕
PLEASE PLEASE MAKE A VIDEO ON HOW TO DEAL WITH A TOXIC MOTHER .. especially if you still live with them
please help
This used to be me , especially with my Mother-n-law , I was always trying to please her and my husband once said you’re never going to please her because she loves to b itch.
I love this! Thanks for sharing! Yes, it's true - some people we just can't please.
How do we get RID of that awful gremlin????? I'm really struggling with this.
For me, it was deciding I did not care if it made people mad when I said “No”. That was very empowering. Try saying no to someone’s request (which doesn’t serve you) and tolerate whatever discomfort follows. That person will get over it, and you will have grown stronger.
@@ltg102 YES - I did just that, but felt awful afterwards for several days. At our next committee meeting it became apparent that my response made sense. You know, being in pandemic isolation has not been good for me (an introvert), it takes alot of my energy to speak to a group these days!
We wanna hear from you more sweetheart 🤍
Shiny ♥️
You look beautiful day by day.
Thank you! Blessings!
Virgos 😜
How to shut the ghremlin up