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I couldn't care less if a woman (Filipina or otherwise) has an issue with me being nice to her. If she doesn't appreciate my kindness, I can find a girl who does. I am not playing into worldly dating games claiming that I have to be a certain level jerk to attract a woman.
It does not matter what country the women are from. If you are nice and they are not appreciative....RUN...RUN...RUN...it's a signal there are serious character flaws you will be enduring ongoing...as you are nice along the way you will meet a sincere loving women and find happiness...if not get a loving dog...they have no agendas. ❤❤...good luck to all!
It just makes a stronger case to "rent" them by the hour or evening. give to much = your a simp, give to little = your cheap. frustration and time wasted, either way.
You’re absolutely rationally correct: I live by the motto: “ if it flies, floats or fucks , rent it. And yes , I am now a wise , older and happily divorced white man. Life’s great 👍
And FOR THE RECORD, never go to a WOMAN for dating or relationship advice. Women dont know what they want, other than to manipulate men into their way of thinking and feeling. Men and women are DIFFERENT. If a woman can handle these differences or doesnt EMBRACE these difference that walk away gentleman. We as MEN need to STAND UP and take LEADERDSHIP RESPONSABILITY in knowing more about relationships than women. We need to take these women by the hand and LEAD THEM into the promised land. Look them in the eye and lay down the rules of the relationship right from the start and stop pussyfooting around and looking towards a woman use her psychology on you to make you into a feminized man. If a woman BALKS at your leadership and will NOT FOLLOW you, and kicks and screams at your relationship vision, then simply WALK AWAY and stop wasting your time on trying to impress them or convince them you are worthy of their attention. YOU ARE ALREADY the PRIZE gentleman. You have what she NEEDS even if she doesnt understand it. If she doesnt want to take the time to SEWE you, then she NEVER will be made to SEE you ever. Always remember this when perusing a woman. Always keep yourself in this mindset and framework. Its far more HEALTHY to be alone and functional than to be with a dysfunctional woman!
Morals of the this story: 1. Stay single. 2. Stay single until you find a woman who treats you right IN YOUR CULTURE. 3. Maybe reconsider having a filipina partner.
I am the same. Not in my nature ... but ... I found that being stoic and only saying/doing kind things 50% of the time (or less, never more) when I feel like it can temper things a lot.
Another great video by SGP! Yes, I understand what you mean. Also, in general you loose a girl when she thinks you will stay with her no matter what. She will take it for granted. My Filipina is very sweet, but she knows I have no trouble finding another girl, because she sees the girls watching me and suddenly she hold my hand. I was surprised, but I already know that if a Filipina is serious with you she will go trough great lengths to make sure everyone knows you are a couple. She also asked me in the first days if I ever will go to the Philippines if our relationship don't work out. "Yes!" i said without hesitation and explained later that I would find a Filipina who really want to be on my side. She knows I am to old for games and I will walk away. She knows what things I will never except and she is aware of it. As a guy it's very important to have boundaries. Never forget that " Chad and Tyrone" - the top 1-5% men - don't care and also have an abundance mindset when it comes to women. She was upset because she asked me if I would cry if we broke up. I told her not even one tear. If you don't want me anymore, it's okay. Don't waste my time. I want to give you the world, if it's not good enough , it's not my problem. I would cry for the time I lost being in the relationship with you, because the time I never get back. Don't be a simp, you do your best, but it has to be proportionate. The problem with Western (minded) girls is that they think they are princesses, having body counts like Jeff Dahmer, want to do whatever they want, post pictures on social media for guys to like and talk about. Nope, not me. My girl is my girl, if you don't like , find someone else. All of those girls I knew with this mindset are now literal home alone with at least one cat and some of them single mothers. They always knew better, they always did whatever they wanted or feel like. Wanted to be a lady when it suits them!
This is very true in essence. To let them know we can move on. And if they dont want play ball with a good guys feelings. I feel marriage is a good remedy to balance out this phenomenom. Anything less is a distructive Game that ends in Hurt, especially in the Philipines.
A wise man once said, "for men, a woman is an accessory to your life; they can improve it but they don't automatically make it good." I forget who I said that too. 😂 Be honest and respectful with women, but make it perfectly clear that you're living your own life and they can either join it or not. They're additions, not prizes. Be confident and casual; don't be a jerk about it but don't sound unsure of yourself. If she knows that you're going to carry on like normal, with or without her, she'll be less inclined to treat you like her meal ticket. That typically weeds out the weak ones and then you can focus on the worthwhile women. This is typically what people mean by not being a "nice guy." It's a shame most people can't properly articulate this.
Bottom line, you can't buy love. I think the message here is that any girl doesn't appreciate feeling bought. Good message. I learned something. I'm one of those guys she mentioned that tips big. So my question is "how do you leave a nice tip without any strings attached?" I just like tipping because I've worked the industry before.
You can buy love, you just don't know where to shop. Another thing, why would anybody leave a tip with strings attached? Your question doesn't make any sense.
@@oahuguy3918 That's irrelevant. Let's focus here, Jim. But I'm glad that you agree that love can be bought. Now, could you please answer my question, Jimmy? 🤔Why would anybody leave a tip with strings attached? Don't you dare run away from me, Jim, or I'll lose hope in humanity. Explain yourself. Thanks.
I watched this whole video. I hope my comment gets pinned cuz i can simply this concept for you. If she doesn't appreciate your gestures or gifts its likely cuz she just didn't like you in the first place. That's really all there is to it. That's like dating a girl and she wants to sleep with you often but you're just not into it... It's not hard to see why... money is to women what sex is to men. There you have it. Having said that dont become a recluse get back out there. many women there that will more than appreciate you. Also i agree with holding back on the generosity in general. In the Philippines a little is a lot and a lot is too much. Even in the states most millionaires don't drive Bentleys... They drive Camrys. And for the very same reason. Cheers
"money is to women what sex is to men." I´m from Sweden. Why don´t You come here and say that to almost any woman here ? I would love to see that !! I had a friend for many years and I was often out with him in all types of clubs and so on starting when he as about 50 y.o. He had a lot of money. In fact in 2012 he was one of Sweden´s 10 largest taxpayers. But who got the attention by women in the clubs in Sweden? I did, although I am poor and 2 years older then him. But I´m fit and good looking. He´s not. Imo SEX is to women what SEX is to men. At least that´s my experience.
@@staffanlundberg lol this is actually very funny to me and I know it's true for you so I'm not trying to start anything being attractive and fit always helps but for most women they'd choose security over hotness 9 times out of ten
@@staffanlundberg Women in clubs just want to "have fun". They don't choose the same men (or the same qualities) when it's time to "have fun" or to get married. Look it up by yourself, it's not hard to find.
Thanks! Great information and insight. I wish I would’ve known about this before I got married the first time and then the second time. I see myself creating that huge gap that cannot be over come in those relationships.
If you put her on a pedestal she will call you and treat you like a peasant, only SIMPS do that, and this rule applies to women all over the world NOT just filipinas..
this is true in Westernization..But not everywhere. Some girls genuinely just want a Husband..and are proud to belong to a man respectfully and Faithfully due to Faith and trust in God.. Its a mindset based on religion not westernisation feminism..Its up to the Man,to be a man. But respect also,, strong beleifs in Godliness.
you clearly dont know the fine art of manipulation, when they dont respond the way you want you need to treat them bad or coldly so they get cautious around you and when youre nice to them their brain release lots of dopamine, and when they dont they get anxious because you treat them bad again, and they slowly get their brains programed by the dopamine on how to act to make you happy.
It makes sense. A leader is supposed to be the adored, and the adorer is supposed to be the follower. The man is supposed to be the leader, and the woman the follower. The man is the buyer, the woman is the seller. The man is the employer, and the woman is the employee. So, a man, being all of these, should only reciprocate when he is given what he expects to be given. It's not about being a jerk or a bad guy, its about being dominant and showing dominance. If you're a kiss-ass, you're not dominant. If you're a sellout, you're not dominant. If you're an employer letting your employees run the show, you're not dominant. If you're a shitty leader, you're not dominant. If you adore a woman, you're putting her on a pedastal, you're asserting that she has dominance, and of course a woman who wants to be the lesser vessel because she wants a man who will lead her and protect her and show dominance in a relationship with her will become very uncomfortable being put in the position of a leader.
Buying them a house is definitely weird. But… if I want to take a trip to Boracay (or wherever), and I have a girlfriend… NOT taking her with me so we can enjoy it together, seems a little weird to me 😂
Agreed. But, this video is geared towards guys who think that "being kind, nice, and generous" is the secret to making a woman like you. Quite often it has the opposite effect. So, yes...be kind. But, don't be too kind.
The man who does this feels she is out of his league....A ridiculous approach to anything in life. His actions tell her that He is not worthy and that He is far from the prized man she has dreamed of her entire life. A king will never bow to any woman for affection, rather he CARRIES HIMSELF LIKE a KING in her presence, is playful and flirtatious with her while keeping the slightest of emotional distance, creates MYSTERY with her(what will he do next??!!, when will he reach out/see me again?), sends discrete notes (maybe a slowly spoken deep voice note with " I had a wonderful time last night", then silence!) , he is constantly giving her tiny touches and kisses simply laughing and unreactive when she tells him to stop, and plays the game of love like the KING she always dreamed of. Only when she is going out of her mind with desire and need for more of his time and touch does he relent slightly, then only allowing a playful glimpse into his feelings for her. This is seduction gentlemen. This is what she wants. You either are her king or you are not worthy. Despite what you think or have been told, the choice is yours.
I think it's more like that the Filipina (or other nationalities) feel like they are being bought and paid for (rather than they are being shown love, by the many gifts), and that they are a valuable commodity and they dislike that, and respond with insults and disrespect. It happened to me with my own Malaysian wife. I was so thoughtful and cared for her in every way, always appreciated and complimented her...she felt superior to me, she left me, and now is trying to take what money and property she can from me.
The reason is simple: once the woman no longer respects you, it’s over..She will take whatever possessions from u and move on or even being by herself is better than living with a man she no longer respects…sad but true..
She’s absolutely right! My girlfriend is from Cebu but she was already living in Canada. Met on dating site and talked a bit. I ended up blocking her because I thought it was a fake account. She didn’t like that, said it’s me who only blocks people. Guys don’t ever do that. Long story short, she found a way to track me through a friend of mine I mentioned to her during our conversation. Ended up meeting and it’s been 2 years together. Moral of the story. Play hard to get 😂
ALSO IF YOU'RE SERIOUS ABOUT HER , look into her ex's and see if she is still in contact with him and ask how she feels about her ex's . If she still loves any of them or is Emotionally Close to any of them , you may need to let her go because she may still be sleeping with them and if you are moving her to your Country . Get a Blood Test Done on her for STD's . YOUR HEALTH IS PRICELESS !!!!!
I haven't lived in the Philippines yet, so maybe the "nice guys finish last" dynamic is taken to a whole new level there. That being said, I attempt to treat every woman like a lady until proven different. There's a real difference between being nice and being a simp. If common courtesy and thoughtfulness keeps me single and alone, I'll get a dog.
Me and my Filipina have been together 6 yrs and I think I only told her maybe once I think... that she was beautiful. Ours works because we actually find each other interesting, attractive and funny. Make sure she likes YOU more than you like her. Men will stay for less a like than a woman will. Some guys do not want to think at all, that is their choice, just know it will take much longer to find someone that fits what you want. I was willing to wait 8 yrs to find mine so nothing wrong with waiting.
Here's a news flash, it's basically the same here in the U.S. regarding the jerk gets the girl over the nice guy. It seems a little crazy because it is. The American girl does this a little differently than her Filipina counterpart but the results are the same. A long list of one night stands, short & long term break ups and the most common are the 2-3 divorces and a bad habit that ends either an online dating app in your +50s or a lap dog.
The examples you have given all can be attributed to the attitudes of feminism. A woman is supposed to be exactly the same as a man. Then, if a man gives large or extravagant gifts, she feels inadequate and it makes her pull away. The issue is that women think men place the same value on things that they do and vice versa. Nothing could be further from the truth. A simple gesture of bringing me a cup of coffee, sitting next to me and holding me for a few minutes is worth more to me than an iPhone and a trip to Boracay combined. I can do those for myself. The simple acts of kindness, that only a woman can give, are the things that are missing, and most valuable to me as a man.
I have had a Filipina girlfriend for 3.5 years. We first had a relationship for a year online where I never spent any money on her before I met her in person. We both have bought inexpensive gifts for each other. When we stay together, I stay at her house for free but I buy all the groceries. I bought her an engagement ring she didn’t want anything too expensive. She has a a job with the Government and does not want me to feel obligated to support her until we are married. I did take her to Boracay once to visit a Filipino friend of mine that owns a resort there. We both enjoyed our time together there and visiting my friends. But all the time spent travelling was too much. She doesn’t want to go to Boracay again. The moral of the story is that you don’t have to spoil a Filipina to fall in love with her.
Let them know when they breach your boundaries , tell them to leave and go home as you need time to think , Make her realise she has done wrong and she will respect you for it , They need guidance all the time & look to you for decision making , Your the financial backbone and leader and she deep down is wanting this from you .
It happens everyday in the Philippines. Guys show up and empty their wallets thinking that it's going to make a Filipina like them. It usually has the opposite effect.
It is more to do with trust. Most people anywhere in the world will think that "if he is too good to be true, then it must be". Often men forgets that showering material goods will not always bring about a good outcome. Girls will always think that you are trying to buy her love rather than trying to win her love and that the pattern will continue after marriage. Same as bringing up children. Children will often appreciate your time, your presence and involvement over material things like toys. I was a pauper and married a very well do lady. One day I asked her why she chose me out of the hundreds of very wealthy and good looking guys chasing her. She said, "'Guys with wealth and good looks always will think they can get anyone they want, and whatever they want, and their roving eyes will never be satisfied". We are now celebrating our 50th anniversary, and yes she helped me build our own wealth. I had nothing to give her other than what she wanted, love, loyalty, respect and faithfulness, and she gave me everything I need.
I do understand and agree that guys can get out of hand with gifts; but at the same time, the Filipina can still become an adorer...in the end, it's all about communication. When each one puts the needs of the other first, they both become the adorer and the adored. The problem is, guys go too far in giving gifts and the Filipina assigns too much value to the gift. For example, if a guy is rich, giving an iPhone doesn't really mean that much as when he is poor. It's all about perspective and maturity. If the lady is going to get cold and distant after receiving a gift, she can reject it and simply tell the guy...hey buddy, I appreciate the sentiment, but its too much. Lets just enjoy each others at a personal level for now. The guy will appreciate this kind of honesty and he will learn how to give good gifts. So, the problem is really about communication in the end, which is a matter related to maturity. Maturity in life affects both the giving and receiving of gifts. If I met a Filipina lady and she doesn't know how to communicate, that's a huge red flag...time to move on. I don't have time to manage others at such a rudimentary level.
I remember in my US Navy days when we would pull into Subic Bay (Yes, I’m that old). The bar girls in Olongapo would say, “I love you no shit, buy me a new car” and then of course have the Filipina girls giggle. There might’ve been one or two sailors, who bought a new car, but then they lost the girl.
Exactly! Reward her good behavior a little at a time. Treat her like she's famous and she'll treat you like a fan. Too many simps in the comments don't understand women's nature...putting her on a pedestal only makes her look down on you.
Another component to this topic. Younger women chase the bad boys because they mistake the good masculine qualities of a solid man, with that of the bad boys. Women are drawn to men with dark triad psychological issues. (Most prevalent in younger women) On the male side, these habits are leading with your wallet. Better strategy, observe her character and determine if she’s worthy of your investment.
As a foreigner with experience of dating Filipinas in the Philippines, I can say most of them DO like it when you're nice to them! I don't know if Ellie is talking about westernized girls in Manila or what, but I've been to many places in the Philippines and tried dating in different cities (until I found my girlfriend who is from Cebu), and I can tell you most Filipinas do like it when you're nice to them. Just don't go overboard right at the start, take it slow. Because if you don't know each other and you already give her a new iPhone or a trip to Boracay, she will either just refuse or she will think something suspicious. For the first date, most Filipinas are perfectly fine if it's just a casual stroll through the mall or the park and then sitting down for a drink while talking and getting to know each other. They don't have those high expectations that western women do. Then when you've dated a couple of times and maybe you're exclusive with her, then she will accept gifts from you like flowers and such, and is likely to go on a trip with you, but not at the first time you meet her.
So basically Filipina’s are the same as American women 😑 or any woman in general, I guess all the hype behind the "passport Bros" phenomenon is just a big exaggeration. I don’t like this game of "oh you have to be a jerk to your woman at times to make her fall for you" it’s degrading and it feels uneasy and I am not willing to compromise my own honor or moral integrity just to impress a woman or keep her around. I guess this whole approach is universal and this is what humanity as a whole likes to entertain, the idea of self-destructive behavior in order to obtain love but yet we romanticize the concept of love and we visualize and fantasize or even expect it to be a a straightforward process between two peoples that lead to a tomorrow full of memories and wonder but yet when applied to reality it just seems people like to be counterintuitive to this process by making things harder and more difficult with even unrealistic expectations, I mean when you get down to the fundamentals of it all people are suppose to be happy and feel like they can express themselves freely with their partners which leads to healthy and successful relationships (aside from the tolerance and commitment part) but is it truly love if a person has to act a certain way that goes against his or her personality or beliefs in order to get a partner or let alone have a chance to love them? I mean all relationships are difficult but if you put on a false facade to appease a woman (or vice versa) eventually the person will get very miserable and lose interest in the relationship and eventually it leads to cheating or even arguments. All in all, is it good to change a bit for a person to achieve compromises or even leave behind negative values or habits in order to make the relationship last? Yes (in my own opinion), is it good to establish boundaries? Yes, is it good to take care of yourself so you can be the best for your partner? Yes, but what is not good is to become something that you are not just to get what you want because the dating advice that this channel and all other people on TH-cam or even platforms across all social media will tell you this is how dating interactions should be and I have to say it’s a recipe for disaster. You can call me naive or inexperienced or delusional but the way I see it it’s just simple, be yourself and be up for a little change to work through with your partner and ultimately find someone who can make you feel like you can be yourself. Anyway Smart Girl Philippines, I have thoroughly enjoyed your content thus far but the dating advice and how you are painting the females from your country just seems like love is an impossibility at this point and to all the honest men out there in the word who are hopelessly in love just know that finding romance isn’t the end all to be all, work toward your future and try to become the best version of yourself that you have always dreamed of, there is always a better tomorrow and fight for it. Have a good day 👍
Thank You SGP 🙏🏼❤😎 for showing the truth in this video. Many guys don't realize the thing's that you mentioned in your video are the truth. My personal opinion is simply this, if a Filipina doesn't show a love attraction or sincere interest in me, I will move on to find a woman that will. The most important thing is I never act or feel needy. I am totally fine to be alone. And I let her know that I don't play games.
great advice. would be confusing to be ghosted after being nice. have to be careful because the economies are so very different; it would be easy to over-tip, etc.
You're right. I've seen it time and time again in my 63 years. Good men are predictable thus boring. Women require a level of excitement and will seek it. But they want you to create it. Many settle many more don't and begin looking for toxicity.
Dated a few girls before another foreign dude sat me down and laid it out to me. I thought he was joking, and then we went bar hoping. Me asking them nice questions, he being an arse the entire time. Needless to say I stopped being the nice guy but didn't chose to be a rude English either. Just be firm, set standards early, and hold her accountable.
Who is on first? This is so hard to follow. You have to build a relationship for a while before you can really open your wallet. I would not be uncomfortable if a girl buys me a Tesla. Give her something and she becomes cold, then back off and she goes after you, however, treat her nice when she comes back, but do not get her anything. She will not understand but find ways to help her family. She will be after you more. The thing that really gets her is to make it seem like you might be interested in other Filipinas, but never let her confirm it.
If she's not your GF or wife you shouldn't be buying any girl anything anyway, especially no phone....the extra tip thing isn't a big deal though imo (that's the way we do things here in america anyway...we tip extra for good service and yeah if a waitress is cute and flirty, why not...i know i did that a few times before)
Every women i was nice to in a relationship, she ended up treating me like garbage and a weakling, some time goes by and I begin to disrespect them and ignore their calls and now they come chasing me😂
Being dominant in your nature is not enough to really attract women. Women are in some ways just like us. They appreciate beauty, viltality, intellgence and many other traits in a man. Kindness is also appreciated especially when the man has other positive traits. Emotional intelligence and humour is highly appreciated in a man by women. I can go on but I rest my case with the conclusion that commentators here seem to believe a bit too much in "dominance" as the decisive factor for women to choose a man. I agree that "dominance" as another word for having Your shit together in an organized way is more important in poor countries as well as having the confidence to "lead" but even in poor countries it is not necessarily the deciding factor in her choice of a partner.
I will go through life doing the best that I can at everything that I try. Including my relationships. I will always be a nice person in life no matter what some dumb ass in another country thinks about it!
👉 Download our FREE Cheat Sheet with 97 travel tips for the Philippines. You won't find these tips anywhere else on TH-cam. smartgirlphilippines.ck.page/cheatsheet
If they are a christian and they do not honour you for your actions then they are denying Christ. I leave it at that.
I can’t get your link to open. Will buy you a Tesla and a new iPhone if you can suggest an alternative way to obtain your 97 tips
And you , are you single .. guapaka
Just a little guapaka , haha
I couldn't care less if a woman (Filipina or otherwise) has an issue with me being nice to her. If she doesn't appreciate my kindness, I can find a girl who does. I am not playing into worldly dating games claiming that I have to be a certain level jerk to attract a woman.
Naive
💯👍👏
Yep what a bunch of crap this advice is.
That's true for many women, not just the Philippines.
It does not matter what country the women are from. If you are nice and they are not appreciative....RUN...RUN...RUN...it's a signal there are serious character flaws you will be enduring ongoing...as you are nice along the way you will meet a sincere loving women and find happiness...if not get a loving dog...they have no agendas. ❤❤...good luck to all!
Treat her like a queen and she will treat you like a pawn
almost like people are people wherever they're from...
Exactly!
@portlandGTR very true
Another Fuc**in feminist...
@@portlandGTR so damn true.
It just makes a stronger case to "rent" them by the hour or evening. give to much = your a simp, give to little = your cheap. frustration and time wasted, either way.
Pros are the best.
You’re absolutely rationally correct:
I live by the motto:
“ if it flies, floats or fucks , rent it. And yes , I am now a wise , older and happily divorced white man.
Life’s great 👍
You're.
Its selfish to expect someone to reciprocate your generosity
Wise words
And FOR THE RECORD, never go to a WOMAN for dating or relationship advice. Women dont know what they want, other than to manipulate men into their way of thinking and feeling. Men and women are DIFFERENT. If a woman can handle these differences or doesnt EMBRACE these difference that walk away gentleman. We as MEN need to STAND UP and take LEADERDSHIP RESPONSABILITY in knowing more about relationships than women. We need to take these women by the hand and LEAD THEM into the promised land. Look them in the eye and lay down the rules of the relationship right from the start and stop pussyfooting around and looking towards a woman use her psychology on you to make you into a feminized man.
If a woman BALKS at your leadership and will NOT FOLLOW you, and kicks and screams at your relationship vision, then simply WALK AWAY and stop wasting your time on trying to impress them or convince them you are worthy of their attention. YOU ARE ALREADY the PRIZE gentleman. You have what she NEEDS even if she doesnt understand it. If she doesnt want to take the time to SEWE you, then she NEVER will be made to SEE you ever. Always remember this when perusing a woman. Always keep yourself in this mindset and framework. Its far more HEALTHY to be alone and functional than to be with a dysfunctional woman!
Morals of the this story:
1. Stay single.
2. Stay single until you find a woman who treats you right IN YOUR CULTURE.
3. Maybe reconsider having a filipina partner.
She is 100 percent right no matter how many times I go there I find that is so true sucks because it isn't in me to be that way
I am the same. Not in my nature ... but ... I found that being stoic and only saying/doing kind things 50% of the time (or less, never more) when I feel like it can temper things a lot.
Treat them nice when they deserve it, as simple as that.
@@leotravel85 lotta expats can't make that distinction that's the problem
Another great video by SGP!
Yes, I understand what you mean.
Also, in general you loose a girl when she thinks you will stay with her no matter what. She will take it for granted.
My Filipina is very sweet, but she knows I have no trouble finding another girl, because she sees the girls watching me and suddenly she hold my hand. I was surprised, but I already know that if a Filipina is serious with you she will go trough great lengths to make sure everyone knows you are a couple. She also asked me in the first days if I ever will go to the Philippines if our relationship don't work out. "Yes!" i said without hesitation and explained later that I would find a Filipina who really want to be on my side. She knows I am to old for games and I will walk away. She knows what things I will never except and she is aware of it. As a guy it's very important to have boundaries.
Never forget that " Chad and Tyrone" - the top 1-5% men - don't care and also have an abundance mindset when it comes to women. She was upset because she asked me if I would cry if we broke up. I told her not even one tear. If you don't want me anymore, it's okay. Don't waste my time. I want to give you the world, if it's not good enough , it's not my problem. I would cry for the time I lost being in the relationship with you, because the time I never get back. Don't be a simp, you do your best, but it has to be proportionate. The problem with Western (minded) girls is that they think they are princesses, having body counts like Jeff Dahmer, want to do whatever they want, post pictures on social media for guys to like and talk about. Nope, not me. My girl is my girl, if you don't like , find someone else. All of those girls I knew with this mindset are now literal home alone with at least one cat and some of them single mothers. They always knew better, they always did whatever they wanted or feel like. Wanted to be a lady when it suits them!
This is very true in essence. To let them know we can move on. And if they dont want play ball with a good guys feelings. I feel marriage is a good remedy to balance out this phenomenom.
Anything less is a distructive Game that ends in Hurt, especially in the Philipines.
Being too nice is a sign of weakness and desperation I'm the prize if she's lucky!😅
I thought I was confused before. Now I know I am!!😂
A wise man once said, "for men, a woman is an accessory to your life; they can improve it but they don't automatically make it good." I forget who I said that too. 😂 Be honest and respectful with women, but make it perfectly clear that you're living your own life and they can either join it or not. They're additions, not prizes. Be confident and casual; don't be a jerk about it but don't sound unsure of yourself. If she knows that you're going to carry on like normal, with or without her, she'll be less inclined to treat you like her meal ticket. That typically weeds out the weak ones and then you can focus on the worthwhile women. This is typically what people mean by not being a "nice guy." It's a shame most people can't properly articulate this.
You are absolutely spot on with this statement!
This is the truth 💯 and should be pinned to the top!
Bottom line, you can't buy love. I think the message here is that any girl doesn't appreciate feeling bought. Good message. I learned something. I'm one of those guys she mentioned that tips big. So my question is "how do you leave a nice tip without any strings attached?" I just like tipping because I've worked the industry before.
You can buy love, you just don't know where to shop. Another thing, why would anybody leave a tip with strings attached? Your question doesn't make any sense.
You’re right. Women can be bought, but how’s that going for you?
@@oahuguy3918 That's irrelevant. Let's focus here, Jim. But I'm glad that you agree that love can be bought. Now, could you please answer my question, Jimmy? 🤔Why would anybody leave a tip with strings attached? Don't you dare run away from me, Jim, or I'll lose hope in humanity. Explain yourself. Thanks.
I watched this whole video. I hope my comment gets pinned cuz i can simply this concept for you. If she doesn't appreciate your gestures or gifts its likely cuz she just didn't like you in the first place. That's really all there is to it. That's like dating a girl and she wants to sleep with you often but you're just not into it... It's not hard to see why... money is to women what sex is to men. There you have it. Having said that dont become a recluse get back out there. many women there that will more than appreciate you. Also i agree with holding back on the generosity in general. In the Philippines a little is a lot and a lot is too much. Even in the states most millionaires don't drive Bentleys... They drive Camrys. And for the very same reason. Cheers
"money is to women what sex is to men." I´m from Sweden. Why don´t You come here and say that to almost any woman here ? I would love to see that !!
I had a friend for many years and I was often out with him in all types of clubs and so on starting when he as about 50 y.o. He had a lot of money. In fact in 2012 he was one of Sweden´s 10 largest taxpayers.
But who got the attention by women in the clubs in Sweden? I did, although I am poor and 2 years older then him.
But I´m fit and good looking. He´s not. Imo SEX is to women what SEX is to men. At least that´s my experience.
@@staffanlundberg lol this is actually very funny to me and I know it's true for you so I'm not trying to start anything being attractive and fit always helps but for most women they'd choose security over hotness 9 times out of ten
@@staffanlundberg Women in clubs just want to "have fun".
They don't choose the same men (or the same qualities) when it's time to "have fun" or to get married.
Look it up by yourself, it's not hard to find.
Thanks! Great information and insight. I wish I would’ve known about this before I got married the first time and then the second time. I see myself creating that huge gap that cannot be over come in those relationships.
Thank you so much!
A great deal of wisdom from such a young woman . Well done.
The moment you prioritise her, is the moment she makes you an option. Dili lang yo.
If you put her on a pedestal she will call you and treat you like a peasant, only SIMPS do that, and this rule applies to women all over the world NOT just filipinas..
this is true in Westernization..But not everywhere. Some girls genuinely just want a Husband..and are proud to belong to a man respectfully and Faithfully due to Faith and trust in God.. Its a mindset based on religion not westernisation feminism..Its up to the Man,to be a man. But respect also,, strong beleifs in Godliness.
you clearly dont know the fine art of manipulation, when they dont respond the way you want you need to treat them bad or coldly so they get cautious around you and when youre nice to them their brain release lots of dopamine, and when they dont they get anxious because you treat them bad again, and they slowly get their brains programed by the dopamine on how to act to make you happy.
Very Smart insight! Thanks for video. You are sincere!
Thanks!
Thanks so much Steve! I'm ordering Jollibee tomorrow from you for the girls. We appreciate you so much. -Irish xoxo
Tired of women and drama. Paying for short time companionship seems to be the key.
Do. NOT be a simp
It makes sense.
A leader is supposed to be the adored, and the adorer is supposed to be the follower. The man is supposed to be the leader, and the woman the follower. The man is the buyer, the woman is the seller. The man is the employer, and the woman is the employee. So, a man, being all of these, should only reciprocate when he is given what he expects to be given. It's not about being a jerk or a bad guy, its about being dominant and showing dominance. If you're a kiss-ass, you're not dominant. If you're a sellout, you're not dominant. If you're an employer letting your employees run the show, you're not dominant. If you're a shitty leader, you're not dominant. If you adore a woman, you're putting her on a pedastal, you're asserting that she has dominance, and of course a woman who wants to be the lesser vessel because she wants a man who will lead her and protect her and show dominance in a relationship with her will become very uncomfortable being put in the position of a leader.
Very well said.
Nice guys finish last
Yeah treat them mean and keep them keen 😂
Every time.
I don't need to go to PI to be treated that way, I get that for free in the West.
Or not at all
@@evcass69 same here midwest
Buying someone you just met a house isn't "nice". Think about how weird that actually is.
there are a lot of weird people everywhere.
That is weird.
That is ultra weird
Buying them a house is definitely weird.
But… if I want to take a trip to Boracay (or wherever), and I have a girlfriend… NOT taking her with me so we can enjoy it together, seems a little weird to me 😂
My parents adored each other. They had an amazing relationship, married 46 years until my father passed. Stop being selfish. Adore, be adored.
don't be nice to people here or else they will just take advantage of you as much as they can...stop being a good guy is a good advice😊
It's complicated. It's a case by case deal. Life and relationships are more complicated than that.
There's a difference between being nice and not having the spine to say no
@@ross9580Exactly
@@ross9580
Exactly!
It is good to be genuinely kind to others.
Agreed. But, this video is geared towards guys who think that "being kind, nice, and generous" is the secret to making a woman like you. Quite often it has the opposite effect. So, yes...be kind. But, don't be too kind.
@@bannertraveller5879 I got confused and thought she was saying I was a woman. Lol.
The man who does this feels she is out of his league....A ridiculous approach to anything in life. His actions tell her that He is not worthy and that He is far from the prized man she has dreamed of her entire life.
A king will never bow to any woman for affection, rather he CARRIES HIMSELF LIKE a KING in her presence, is playful and flirtatious with her while keeping the slightest of emotional distance, creates MYSTERY with her(what will he do next??!!, when will he reach out/see me again?), sends discrete notes (maybe a slowly spoken deep voice note with " I had a wonderful time last night", then silence!) , he is constantly giving her tiny touches and kisses simply laughing and unreactive when she tells him to stop, and plays the game of love like the KING she always dreamed of. Only when she is going out of her mind with desire and need for more of his time and touch does he relent slightly, then only allowing a playful glimpse into his feelings for her.
This is seduction gentlemen. This is what she wants. You either are her king or you are not worthy. Despite what you think or have been told, the choice is yours.
No wonder most of us men who are gentleman but also not a gentle men.
Have just checked out on dating modern wo to man!
Thank you so much, what a nice explanation of what's going on.
Cheats on a hard working man and faithful to a guy in jail..😅
Great content. I never thought of my generosity or niceness as a turn off.
This girl spoke facts
Life and relationships are more complicated than that.
I think it's more like that the Filipina (or other nationalities) feel like they are being bought and paid for (rather than they are being shown love, by the many gifts), and that they are a valuable commodity and they dislike that, and respond with insults and disrespect. It happened to me with my own Malaysian wife. I was so thoughtful and cared for her in every way, always appreciated and complimented her...she felt superior to me, she left me, and now is trying to take what money and property she can from me.
The reason is simple: once the woman no longer respects you, it’s over..She will take whatever possessions from u and move on or even being by herself is better than living with a man she no longer respects…sad but true..
What all these horror-stories have in common is one single word: WIFE. Don´t get married. Don´t let her move in. Be smart. And be in the lead!
This is true. They like strong, smart men. Use this knowledge. It will work.
If you are not the number 1 priority in her life, then she 1000% is not the one. There will always be better options if you have the funds.
she's 10 times not the one? and better options only if you have the funds? Best to stay single.
EXCELLENT synopsis of dynamic relationships! and backed up by science. Well said
science? I heard some psychology. but where's the science? I didn't hear any talk about hormones.
This is a very important topic done fabulously.
She’s absolutely right! My girlfriend is from Cebu but she was already living in Canada. Met on dating site and talked a bit. I ended up blocking her because I thought it was a fake account. She didn’t like that, said it’s me who only blocks people. Guys don’t ever do that. Long story short, she found a way to track me through a friend of mine I mentioned to her during our conversation. Ended up meeting and it’s been 2 years together. Moral of the story. Play hard to get 😂
ALSO IF YOU'RE SERIOUS ABOUT HER , look into her ex's and see if she is still in contact with him and ask how she feels about her ex's . If she still loves any of them or is Emotionally Close to any of them , you may need to let her go because she may still be sleeping with them and if you are moving her to your Country . Get a Blood Test Done on her for STD's . YOUR HEALTH IS PRICELESS !!!!!
I haven't lived in the Philippines yet, so maybe the "nice guys finish last" dynamic is taken to a whole new level there. That being said, I attempt to treat every woman like a lady until proven different. There's a real difference between being nice and being a simp. If common courtesy and thoughtfulness keeps me single and alone, I'll get a dog.
Me and my Filipina have been together 6 yrs and I think I only told her maybe once I think... that she was beautiful. Ours works because we actually find each other interesting, attractive and funny. Make sure she likes YOU more than you like her. Men will stay for less a like than a woman will. Some guys do not want to think at all, that is their choice, just know it will take much longer to find someone that fits what you want. I was willing to wait 8 yrs to find mine so nothing wrong with waiting.
Here's a news flash, it's basically the same here in the U.S. regarding the jerk gets the girl over the nice guy. It seems a little crazy because it is. The American girl does this a little differently than her Filipina counterpart but the results are the same. A long list of one night stands, short & long term break ups and the most common are the 2-3 divorces and a bad habit that ends either an online dating app in your +50s or a lap dog.
Same with USA Women. They see you as an ATM who is supposed to be "generous."
Great. We cant get away from the mind fames anywhere.
I would rather be nice, than being a jerk.
Kindnesses goes both ways.
The examples you have given all can be attributed to the attitudes of feminism. A woman is supposed to be exactly the same as a man. Then, if a man gives large or extravagant gifts, she feels inadequate and it makes her pull away. The issue is that women think men place the same value on things that they do and vice versa. Nothing could be further from the truth. A simple gesture of bringing me a cup of coffee, sitting next to me and holding me for a few minutes is worth more to me than an iPhone and a trip to Boracay combined. I can do those for myself. The simple acts of kindness, that only a woman can give, are the things that are missing, and most valuable to me as a man.
Exactly!
I have had a Filipina girlfriend for 3.5 years. We first had a relationship for a year online where I never spent any money on her before I met her in person. We both have bought inexpensive gifts for each other. When we stay together, I stay at her house for free but I buy all the groceries. I bought her an engagement ring she didn’t want anything too expensive. She has a a job with the Government and does not want me to feel obligated to support her until we are married. I did take her to Boracay once to visit a Filipino friend of mine that owns a resort there. We both enjoyed our time together there and visiting my friends. But all the time spent travelling was too much. She doesn’t want to go to Boracay again.
The moral of the story is that you don’t have to spoil a Filipina to fall in love with her.
Appreciated your input. Merci
Let them know when they breach your boundaries , tell them to leave and go home as you need time to think , Make her realise she has done wrong and she will respect you for it , They need guidance all the time & look to you for decision making , Your the financial backbone and leader and she deep down is wanting this from you .
This was a quality video. Like it or not, you are adored.
creepy
Buy her an iphone? take her to boracay? are you joking? 😅😂😂
My reaction too 🤣🤣
It happens everyday in the Philippines. Guys show up and empty their wallets thinking that it's going to make a Filipina like them. It usually has the opposite effect.
@@SmartGirlPhilippinesprobably Americans are the biggest culprits in the overspend to impress department......
@@SmartGirlPhilippines TRUE
@@SmartGirlPhilippines That's usually because no one likes the feeling of being bought.
It is more to do with trust. Most people anywhere in the world will think that "if he is too good to be true, then it must be".
Often men forgets that showering material goods will not always bring about a good outcome.
Girls will always think that you are trying to buy her love rather than trying to win her love and that the pattern will continue after marriage. Same as bringing up children. Children will often appreciate your time, your presence and involvement over material things like toys.
I was a pauper and married a very well do lady. One day I asked her why she chose me out of the hundreds of very wealthy and good looking guys chasing her. She said, "'Guys with wealth and good looks always will think they can get anyone they want, and whatever they want, and their roving eyes will never be satisfied". We are now celebrating our 50th anniversary, and yes she helped me build our own wealth. I had nothing to give her other than what she wanted, love, loyalty, respect and faithfulness, and she gave me everything I need.
intreistings informations and you preaty girl..salamat po
creepy
Wow that's amazing
I do understand and agree that guys can get out of hand with gifts; but at the same time, the Filipina can still become an adorer...in the end, it's all about communication. When each one puts the needs of the other first, they both become the adorer and the adored. The problem is, guys go too far in giving gifts and the Filipina assigns too much value to the gift. For example, if a guy is rich, giving an iPhone doesn't really mean that much as when he is poor. It's all about perspective and maturity. If the lady is going to get cold and distant after receiving a gift, she can reject it and simply tell the guy...hey buddy, I appreciate the sentiment, but its too much. Lets just enjoy each others at a personal level for now. The guy will appreciate this kind of honesty and he will learn how to give good gifts. So, the problem is really about communication in the end, which is a matter related to maturity. Maturity in life affects both the giving and receiving of gifts. If I met a Filipina lady and she doesn't know how to communicate, that's a huge red flag...time to move on. I don't have time to manage others at such a rudimentary level.
I remember in my US Navy days when we would pull into Subic Bay (Yes, I’m that old). The bar girls in Olongapo would say, “I love you no shit, buy me a new car” and then of course have the Filipina girls giggle. There might’ve been one or two sailors, who bought a new car, but then they lost the girl.
Very Good Video Because you tell the Truth.
Hi, I would like to visit Philippines - please advise on the best time and please to visit
Exactly! Reward her good behavior a little at a time. Treat her like she's famous and she'll treat you like a fan. Too many simps in the comments don't understand women's nature...putting her on a pedestal only makes her look down on you.
Another component to this topic. Younger women chase the bad boys because they mistake the good masculine qualities of a solid man, with that of the bad boys.
Women are drawn to men with dark triad psychological issues. (Most prevalent in younger women)
On the male side, these habits are leading with your wallet.
Better strategy, observe her character and determine if she’s worthy of your investment.
Wow, they're all drawn to men with dark psychological issues he says. WHOH! stay away ladies.
i haven't encountered the ones who have NOT accepted what was given.. i only get the ungrateful receivers who never give back
As a foreigner with experience of dating Filipinas in the Philippines, I can say most of them DO like it when you're nice to them! I don't know if Ellie is talking about westernized girls in Manila or what, but I've been to many places in the Philippines and tried dating in different cities (until I found my girlfriend who is from Cebu), and I can tell you most Filipinas do like it when you're nice to them. Just don't go overboard right at the start, take it slow. Because if you don't know each other and you already give her a new iPhone or a trip to Boracay, she will either just refuse or she will think something suspicious. For the first date, most Filipinas are perfectly fine if it's just a casual stroll through the mall or the park and then sitting down for a drink while talking and getting to know each other. They don't have those high expectations that western women do. Then when you've dated a couple of times and maybe you're exclusive with her, then she will accept gifts from you like flowers and such, and is likely to go on a trip with you, but not at the first time you meet her.
Excellent advice.
So basically Filipina’s are the same as American women 😑 or any woman in general, I guess all the hype behind the "passport Bros" phenomenon is just a big exaggeration. I don’t like this game of "oh you have to be a jerk to your woman at times to make her fall for you" it’s degrading and it feels uneasy and I am not willing to compromise my own honor or moral integrity just to impress a woman or keep her around. I guess this whole approach is universal and this is what humanity as a whole likes to entertain, the idea of self-destructive behavior in order to obtain love but yet we romanticize the concept of love and we visualize and fantasize or even expect it to be a a straightforward process between two peoples that lead to a tomorrow full of memories and wonder but yet when applied to reality it just seems people like to be counterintuitive to this process by making things harder and more difficult with even unrealistic expectations, I mean when you get down to the fundamentals of it all people are suppose to be happy and feel like they can express themselves freely with their partners which leads to healthy and successful relationships (aside from the tolerance and commitment part) but is it truly love if a person has to act a certain way that goes against his or her personality or beliefs in order to get a partner or let alone have a chance to love them? I mean all relationships are difficult but if you put on a false facade to appease a woman (or vice versa) eventually the person will get very miserable and lose interest in the relationship and eventually it leads to cheating or even arguments. All in all, is it good to change a bit for a person to achieve compromises or even leave behind negative values or habits in order to make the relationship last? Yes (in my own opinion), is it good to establish boundaries? Yes, is it good to take care of yourself so you can be the best for your partner? Yes, but what is not good is to become something that you are not just to get what you want because the dating advice that this channel and all other people on TH-cam or even platforms across all social media will tell you this is how dating interactions should be and I have to say it’s a recipe for disaster. You can call me naive or inexperienced or delusional but the way I see it it’s just simple, be yourself and be up for a little change to work through with your partner and ultimately find someone who can make you feel like you can be yourself. Anyway Smart Girl Philippines, I have thoroughly enjoyed your content thus far but the dating advice and how you are painting the females from your country just seems like love is an impossibility at this point and to all the honest men out there in the word who are hopelessly in love just know that finding romance isn’t the end all to be all, work toward your future and try to become the best version of yourself that you have always dreamed of, there is always a better tomorrow and fight for it. Have a good day 👍
Well said.
Thank You SGP 🙏🏼❤😎
for showing the truth in this video. Many guys don't realize the thing's that you mentioned in your video are the truth.
My personal opinion is simply this, if a Filipina doesn't show a love attraction or sincere interest in me, I will move on to find a woman that will. The most important thing is I never act or feel needy. I am totally fine to be alone. And I let her know that I don't play games.
Kindness is taken as weakness, especially in southeast asia.
You're accusing all Filipino's as being weak.
great advice. would be confusing to be ghosted after being nice. have to be careful because the economies are so very different; it would be easy to over-tip, etc.
Nah! They expect you to spend all of your money on them.
Your amazing
The man needs to be the leader in a relationship
Thanks for the advice ❤
The waitress example... I've been told most restaurants in PI have a shared tip arrangement. Tips are pooled and shared between all employees.
ALL women dump nice guys and hang out with bad guys
I can tell you've never had a chick in your life. Stop buying day-ting courses, man, stop generalizing women, and get yourself a chick.
@@ChochiT0-ddd7fd let him think what he wants. I don't want him to get a good girl. He doesn't deserve one.
You're right. I've seen it time and time again in my 63 years. Good men are predictable thus boring. Women require a level of excitement and will seek it. But they want you to create it. Many settle many more don't and begin looking for toxicity.
Thank u
Dated a few girls before another foreign dude sat me down and laid it out to me. I thought he was joking, and then we went bar hoping. Me asking them nice questions, he being an arse the entire time. Needless to say I stopped being the nice guy but didn't chose to be a rude English either. Just be firm, set standards early, and hold her accountable.
This is true when it comes to women in general regardless of were you go.
I wish I could have seen this video 30 years ago 😂😂
Very interesting!
Thank you
The same is true for women all over the world.
Who is on first? This is so hard to follow. You have to build a relationship for a while before you can really open your wallet. I would not be uncomfortable if a girl buys me a Tesla. Give her something and she becomes cold, then back off and she goes after you, however, treat her nice when she comes back, but do not get her anything. She will not understand but find ways to help her family. She will be after you more. The thing that really gets her is to make it seem like you might be interested in other Filipinas, but never let her confirm it.
If somebody bought me a Tesla I'd give it back...or sell it as soon as possible......
@@flybywir1 I agree but I would not feel bad about it.
@@flybywir1 weird
Treat them mean, keep them keen. It’s textbook 👌
If she's not your GF or wife you shouldn't be buying any girl anything anyway, especially no phone....the extra tip thing isn't a big deal though imo (that's the way we do things here in america anyway...we tip extra for good service and yeah if a waitress is cute and flirty, why not...i know i did that a few times before)
Every women i was nice to in a relationship, she ended up treating me like garbage and a weakling, some time goes by and I begin to disrespect them and ignore their calls and now they come chasing me😂
Being dominant in your nature is not enough to really attract women. Women are in some ways just like us. They appreciate beauty, viltality, intellgence and many other traits in a man. Kindness is also appreciated especially when the man has other positive traits. Emotional intelligence and humour is highly appreciated in a man by women. I can go on but I rest my case with the conclusion that commentators here seem to believe a bit too much in "dominance" as the decisive factor for women to choose a man. I agree that "dominance" as another word for having Your shit together in an organized way is more important in poor countries as well as having the confidence to "lead" but even in poor countries it is not necessarily the deciding factor in her choice of a partner.
I will go through life doing the best that I can at everything that I try. Including my relationships. I will always be a nice person in life no matter what some dumb ass in another country thinks about it!
Aferim Sana l agree completely
She's taking me out.😂
Too many western men just act stupid. “More is not better”. The worst compliment a man can receive by a woman is you’re so nice!!!
Interesting.
I am sure that is true everywhere.
People do not like being bought.
If they do then it is probably their business..
Is the same everywhere. If you too nice she will think you lack options and will treat you like a peasant
This true for most ANY Women
Because there used to be getting treated badly
Badly or appropriately ?
@tilapiadave3234 I've seen first hand what some have to go through
@@michaellewis3747 And i have seen what has been done to foreigners by low filipina's including suicide
Everywhere you go good and every country
@@michaellewis3747 EXACTLY correct
Great video! You explained the perspective very well. The phrase is "Smitten by her" not Spitten though :P
I find this bizarre since they don’t have
Much in Phillipines ..you’d think they do anything to keep the guy with the wallet