Yes, mine told me once he discarded me maybe we can get ourselves together than come back together ! 🤣🤦🏽♀️ yeaa now he’s married , cause he knows no matter what, he can’t come back here no more !!!!
Lol mine said "we can still be friends" after she berated me while I was at work unfriend me on Facebook and implies "wE cAn sTilL bE fRienDs" like really?? They are so self centered it's ridiculous literally right after break up they say this and they break up with me while at work do shit to hurt me then act like I was a issue and inconvenience to their life when they literally asked me out flattered me love bomb then dropped that bomb but they act like I it was all me I'm the problem and " wE cAn sTiL bE fRienDs" they are so beside themselves it's rodiculous
So True but it came with a price. I went through anxiety, depression and anger only because every time I tried to break off the 2 year relationship she retaliated with threats and filed four restraining orders on me for every four times I tried getting away. Now I have to get a lawyer because she made me lose my gun license and my job. She lied to the judge saying I grabbed her which I never would do and attacked my moral character. All four police reports justify "no physical contact" but the liberal judge granted her a restraining order with no proof. Oh well, at least she's out of my life so I can move on and become a stronger person. Good Luck all....You'll need it.
So true I'm in the WORST PAIN cause all of my raped are in my head? I can't be around an entity that makes me wanna die! All I wanna do is want to die! All he did was play games this whole time! I have so much tension & pressure of anger that I'm not allowed to show! I do not need this toxic DEATH-lationship!
Yes indeed ... When you discard toxic and narcs in your life your skin will glow people will wonder what is your secret !!!!!! Trust me i have been there before ... Trauma has affected my life in many forms and sizes..... The moment you eradicate toxic folks in your life ,is the moment you will become the best version of yourself ..... I just turned twenty eight.....iam indeed in love with myself ...alack of self love is the root cause of all suffering in this universe..... Don't chase people , be yourself , do your own thing and work hard , i mean work smarter , what i mean by working smarter is technology, mentor and education and then the right people will come to you and stay ....take care and God bless you ..
@@kennethblack8356 oh my god same to me.. but i didn't get convicted yet.. but if she doesn't get her way,, shed start a fight cal 911.... and lied so id go to jaul.. but when i called 911 first and she scratched me so hard,, it drew blood.. the police asked me to leave my own house for a hotel.. police report was filed.. but i had no idea what a pfa was? its a nightmare that I am still living.. How do they get away with such crap... ? i havenet even mentioned the loan scams and forging signatures on loans...
When you discard them first they up the abuse to a whole new level , be careful people , no contact is the only way , these evil predators are insane and want to make you insane too, it almost worked I did loose my mind now I’m on meds to keep me stable , the damage they do to your life and health is the stuff nightmares are made off
YES..... ...me2 but seriously fuck the meds.......try the adaptogenic herbs they r bitchen.......i got a shit load of them from Dragon herbs in tincture form then took high doses n it really is fucking heavenly.......& healthy.......meds r made by fucking narcs......they your tire animals so pull it together n get the catalogue it's free & then pick out what sounds great........ok........want u free n happy 😊
I am right there with you grateful to still be alive. Grateful to be done with these monsters. The Big Bad Wolf begone with you now and forever. C yeah
The one thing I have done right.. I always get to the spot with all these freaks that I know it's over. And I take action. Mind you a little slow:-). But I'm awake and moving ever so slowly forward.
Discard = Disregard. If you're fortunate enough to be discarded by a narcissist, consider yourself "lucky." I liken it to a cat catching a mouse or a bird and torturing it while sadistically toying with it. Then suddenly s/he becomes bored with it and lets it go. Are you lucky? You betcha! 🐀🐦🐺
+Peace Joy oh I wouldn't give narcissists that much power. If it's a cat and mouse story, then it's best to be like an episode of Tom and Jerry. Because in these stories, the mouse gets away every time. And that's how you and I need to be. Able to get away, powerful and strong enough to outsmart the cat.
@The Royal We: Kevin, your point is well taken...BUT, why go back to the cat playing this 'cat and mouse' game? If I'm to be honest with myself, I was tortured by my narcs and left for dead. When I returned to them (thinking this time things would be different), they gladly took me back only to re-torture me again. So now that I've learned my lesson, I discard them before they discard me, and don't give it a second thought. But in the event that they're covert and discard me first, I simply smile and say, "Thank you! You just did me a favor," and never return or look back. Playing games with a narcissist is a waste of my precious time. I'd rather play with my loyal dogs.
@The Royal We: Yes, and thank you for that reminder--I've finally learned my lesson. But sometimes my empathetic nature causes me to hang on longer than I should...BUT, I'm working on it.😊
Girl, I was too busy feeling ”I was in love, brokenhearted & lamebrained ” to realize that being ”discarded” was a dodged bullet. Today, having such an informed & educated understanding of what a narcissist is, what their behavior is like & why...I feel like a brilliant mad scientist who can dissect a narcissist on sight. Oh, such power!🤨
When I feel upset and find myself ruminating about the narc and the new supply, I try to remind myself, 'she is entering the cycle I am leaving.' Make it your mantra. Much strength to you all
I realized that a narcissist can discard you even without leaving your house. A narcissist will have multiple supplies during the day, come home very late, leave very early, have children with other supplies and keep top secrets.
I have all the same as u but I found she has full blown witch craft against my life with discarding our children death threats a a few thousand customer s she sexually makes money with cash apps an private social profiles it was hard to figure all this out towards her end
I discarded my narc on my birthday. Best present I gave myself. Goodbye to the Jezebel evil spirit. No contact, deleted, him and his toxic family. #byefelicia
🙏😂 mine dragged our child & I to his daddy's to 4ever live w/his Narc cult in craphole wyoming but 3 weeks in I packed what I could & we fled overnight😂 It's sure creeeepy being forced to watch in laws pat his head and ignore what a shit he is! Our teen was so relieved to go back to California
You need to control the final discard and go absolutely no contact, whatever it takes! Its all about power and control and i ain't giving up my power no more
check mate good for you i wish u all the best! Just make sure u build up allies that u can trust unequivocally cause Lord only knows what they are really capable of and to what levels they are willing to stoop! U are a inspiration❤️🙏 Make the rest of your life the best of your life!
check mate I am not trying to be mean or judgmental but when you have children they are your top priority at all times and if you’re in a relationship with an abusive partner especially one who exposes your children to abuse or is abusive to them directly or they have to watch a person be abusive to you, why would you stay so long? I got rid of my Narc after 3 months only went back to him once for a month and as soon as the inappropriate behavior and verbal abuse started again I left and never looking back. I don’t even have kids I just know I’m worth more than this but had I had kids he would have never lasted more than a month the second his horrible behavior surfaced I would be gone because I would never want my kids to be exposed to that. It’s still hard I miss the good times I had with my Narc but I know that anytime he was nice it was fake and that he never truly loved me as he said he did. Your children should always come first before anyone since their father isn’t with you. Your job to protect them and if I were you I would date someone quite awhile before I brought my child around them. Sorry I just don’t understand exposes kids to these monsters as soon as the person acts up in front of my kids he would be gone.
Cozette M .. not judgemental, but I was that way dating in past, I knew this demon when we were kids.. my 1st best friend, 1975-82, we reconnected when we were 41... . I was love bombed (built on that childhood friendship ) , he was also a single dad, yes I love his twins, The depths that this creature went to bring me and my kids in, traveling to see me, moving us 950 miles back to home state, so no not judgemental, just "you haven't walked in my shoes " Point though We are free, my youngest is 19... his poor kids still there with him cause mother is scared of him are 16...
Cozette M Good for you! So glad u are out now! U are absolutely right your kid should be your number one priority however i am financially dependent on the narc for a roof over my head etc and have been so isolated by him over the years! He can give my son everything that i am not able to, also my boy has been so brainwashed that i am the biggest looser on planet earth that i fear its too little to late and he is also now abusive towards me at 13 years old! My son adores his father and loves him dearly so i need to respect that. 💜🙏
I discarded him about 16 months ago. Then after a whole year he started called and leaving messages. He wants me back, I was the best woman in his life (that was the truth), can’t we just forget about old problems and move on together. Blah blah blah. I never respond so now the messages also include that he keeps calling but I don’t respond. Yep! So glad that I am hanging tough. He was the love of my life I thought but after the cheating ,the lies etc. , I realize life alone is much more peaceful and cheaper too!!,
In my case it was me who was trying to call her one year after she discarded me. There was a lot of stuff which I didnt understand in her behavior (didnt know she is a narcissist at that time) so I just wanted to clear some things and didnt want to be rude at her or get her back. She did not pick the phone but after 2 days she sent me sms and make me look like Iam that one who is a total narcissist. I have never met with so "lack of understanding" for other human beings she showed me. Bleh... These people always think when you want to discuss with them something or you are angry at them that you must either love them or you are envy of them and cant move on and live your own life, but never because they did something bad... And finally they beg you for letting them live their own lives so they look like the good ones in front of the others... lol
If his mode of operation is similar to my ex he was always on the make. But watch out he could easily try to squeeze back in. No change in him but make the insult disappear. And just say no.
My narcissists husband and me were together for 35 years. I discarded him, no contact and asked him to leave the house. 4 months on still in no contact. Best feeling to knock them out of the game.
You have no idea how badly I needed to hear this right now. Not about me choosing to make it the final discard, but consciously deciding to discard the toxic waste from my life. Every time he pops up in my head again I’m going to make this my mantra. Thank you! Today is one month since he went silent and two weeks since I blocked him everywhere. It was a blessing in disguise but now I’m dealing with the hurt, the anger, the humiliation….so much that it’s making me miserable. I don’t want him back. I want him out of my head, my heart and my life. I choose to discard this toxic waste from my head, my body and my life.
I finally managed to get rid of my narcissist after 12 years of pain. Everything you say is right. I am happy now I am free of all the lies and mind games. Life is good.
Thank you. 13 years here. Getting divorced now and we are in the discard stage. I wouldn’t still have s3x so he’s throwing me completely away. Cutting off all support. Praying it’s over soon. He’s already looking for new woman
Discard is such a painful thing to go through. For me, it's ruined any trust I had in love and relationships. I am now that traumatized person expecting to be used and left behind. I can't tell if someone is really into me or just pretending and using me. I guess I'm sorting of running from intimacy and finding someone new because I'm too scared to get hurt again. I don't know how to change that, but I suppose right now I'll take loneliness over pain.
agreed - narcissism is such an epidemic. I try now to ensure i can recognize the signs of narcissism early and keep myself from going too far down a path with certain people.
I literally cried watching this because I was thinking of what I went through with the narc and is so glad I found the strength to discard him. He just took, gaslighted, gave me silent treatments, broke up with me several times then asked me to take him back every time. No appearance came without a pity party. He made me feel horrible about myself and crazy only to leave me with nothing but a broom to clean up the mess he made...the broken pieces of my heart. I've moved on and hope that SOB stay gone!
+Kimberly Bellamy thank you so much for watching hun. These people will continue to ask you to come back into their life in one way shape or form. This is exactly why I made this video, in order to be able to say enough is enough
Hey Kimberly Bellamy ...Melissa here ...CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR STRENGTH AND RESILIENCE TO GO NO CONTACT. BU T wow sounds like my story with my NARC but I have come to realize while watching and learning that my exNarc was. A psychopath as well. Which is a double WAMMY .so I have two ?? (If that’s ok) how long did it take for u to heal and when and what did u do to stop blaming & beating yourself up ..?? Everyday I still hear the words the. Gas lighting the flying monkeys and their dumb shit ...it still hurts..when does it go away does it ever go away. And do u believe they get there KARMA..???
Hey funny thing is my ex Narc has really discarded me.YUP lol REALLY HE DID AND If COURSE IMMEDIATELY SUPPLY WHEN IT HAPPENED (6months ) now. And he has NEVER ASKED TO COME BACK ..told me everyday what a loser and whore I WAS ...and quoted actually He never would come back because all I did was ruin his life. .i would love to compare of the LIST HE. HAS AN REAL LIST OF WHAT EACH-ONE OF US DID for EACHOTHER. Never happen. Just like their KARMA WILL NEVE HAPPEN. BECAUSE NOTHING WAS EVER THEIR FAULTS TO BEGIN WITH.
He discarded me and went back to the same girls he told me “not to worry about “ straight away 😂😂 it’s what they do, they need supply after supply.. but I’m getting stronger by the day and don’t want anything to do with him
Same here...he ghosted me few months back for his ex...broke up with her, came apologizing to me assuring me he will never go back to her...unfortunately i gave him a 2nd chance...and a month back he ghosted me again for the same girl!!!! Bullet dodged
Thats exactly what they do. Our intuition is spot on. All the girls be told me not to worry about were actually people I needed to worry about. Disgusting.
They are easily bored, and when they triangulate....they get double ⛽️ fuel. Play old supply against new supply.... Creates jealousy....makes them feel so important.
They also play their one and only sister vs the class A supply if they can see your getting close, it's not the sister that causes the chaos it's the narrcist trying to keep you separate, its jealousy, but the sister will always stand by the narc and play games even thoe they both dont talk emotions,they have none, they dont always have a knew supply, but they will talk with the opposite sex just to get a thrill.
Happened. He actually said he’s having fun when I caught him cheating on Instagram and asked the other girl, who he has now married lol, about what’s up with them. They’re sick
@@servjeetsingh2379 I'm sorry this is happening to you. It happened to me too, it's a terrible and uncomfortable position to find yourself in. I meant these individuals that intentionally create these troublemaking and hurtful scenarios are pathetic. You deserve to be in a good space, not this bullshit.
I was discard by someone,when it was time for him to carry out a promise and today I don't know why. He lied to me. It has been hard and has cause me a lot of pain. I am trying to get over it and move on. If I said or did something I wish he would at least told me, but he has gone silent treatment on me. Some time people can be so mean. But it is time with God help I move on and allow God to Bless my life with better.
Colleen . A person was the worst addiction I’ve ever experienced for a LONG time.... alcoholics and substance abusers talk about insanity and I couldn’t relate BUT when I apply it to THIS SPECIFIC person, I was very close to insanity. I had never been exposed to anyone like this in my life or thought process. Unreal.... and slowly moving forward - after several rounds of BS.
You just taught us (the abused) who really is in control of the relationship. I've never heard it spoken about in this way. So beautiful. When we know our own value, because GOD values us, then we are the ones that have no use for the narcissist. The 'ball' is and always has been in our court! GOD BLESS You!!!!
+TruthBeTold777 yes and it's absolutely true you are in control of the relationship. This is the point you are in control of all of your relationships. Because you control what you do where you go who you talk to and how you talk. These are things that narcissist can never control unless we hand over that control.
You are absolutely right. If God is for us who can be against us . Gods love is totally satisfying to me , i dont need a man in my life. Praise Him, well Jesus is my man ! K
Just wow this really help I thought I was crazy it's funny everything I went through our relationship ended because I asked him to open my door for me and treat me like a lady we had a big argument he gave me the silent treatment and then he broke up with me but looking at this video I realized he never treated me like a lady I had to keep asking for it and all of his needs we're being met I thought I was the narcissist because I was always taking care of him and tell him how much I did so I really was starting to believe that about myself but after watching this video I realize he has always treated me the same way I went back and look at old text messages when I was begging him to talk to me and where he would stand me up and it was always the same thing as it started to get hot outside I knew he was going to find a new Supply he just picked that little argument to end it why deal with it I don't want to open your door I don't want to treat you that way I'll just find someone else I'll get it now
Great point Kevin as usual. Narcissists just leave us when they consider us as useless for them. And often reapper when they are out of supply. I have discarded my PN 5 weeks ago. After a 4 years relationship. And...since then my days have never been so peacefull! No more drama. No more manipulations. No more expectations and needs unmet. No more tears. I am slowly finding back my true self and the funny girl I used to be before walking on eggshells with him. And I know that life has wonderfull plans for me ;) Thanks Kevin for your usefull advices and kisses from the south of France.
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
Yasss they start out sweet somewhat giving and helpful then it stops and they expect you to continually treat them like a king well mine was a queen hello nah gonna tell me oh you use to bring me ice oh you use to give me massages now you complain and I barely ask you I did it in the beginning trying I come home every day after being on my feet 7/8hrs a day this chick has the nerve to tel me she doesn’t know how to do massages that’s why 😝 Chile please users and emotional abusers I fell back now she states: I changed I talk to her too aggressive I don’t cook everyday I don’t sexually please her… and im distancing myself she ask do I wanna be with her mind you after 4:5 mnths if so called being engaged I told her it’s not working again she says do you wanna be with me no I don’t so today we broke up when 4 days ago she gave each other back keys and now this and hellah accusing me why because she doing her that’s fine.. I won’t be a fool again I’ll stand my grown and don’t get sucked back in toxic emotional vamps and users
I was married to a narcissistic man for 27 years. He “discarded” me by moving out and divorcing me. I have often wondered if he would want me back if I groveled at his feet, lol. That’s not happening, but he lives just a mile away with his parents. No contact for 2 months now and I am happier than I have been since I can’t remember.
Kathy, mine also moved out while I was at work, on Mother’s Day. Then he filed for divorce. I have to believe that means we won. James 4:7 says submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
I swear there’s got to be a Narc play by play book as so many of us have the same story??? I do not ever will understand this Massive Personality Disorder? I was so numb from years of abusive commentary that I did not believe the comments. Was raised to believe in myself… and even though I did not believe the ugliness he said at me it still ill affected me. I truly felt Horrible physically and mentally so now, I am rebuilding my life! Thank GOD!
@@itisfinishednowtimetoclean2723 My husband got a dv order which made me leave within 15 minutes. I'm sure he'll divorce me which is fine the only problem is I'm homeless. I'll be alright it will take some time and effort to get back up.
@@DOTMH_1 so sorry hun. I've been right where you are at. These people are heartless, soulless monsters. We did nothing to deserve such inhumane treatment. The sooner you leave, the sooner you heal. Hugs ❤
The comment about how they demean our character is so true, and more so when we did nothing wrong. And it hits you more in the brain as you can see crystal clear the hypocrisy of them being abusive and characterless and then projecting it all back onto you.
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
I'm on day 5. I caught him cheating after taking every kind of abuse from him. He tries to cover it up in my face. Lol..needless to say..I got my ass out of there with nothing but the clothes on my back. But, I'm free. 💕
Eva Green I just read your post about leaving your ex with nothing “but the clothes on your back”. I’m curious how the last year has been if you don’t mind me asking? Did he get you to go back did the cycles start again or did you truly discard the relationship? Thanks for taking the time. Jeff
It's so true they start looking for easier as soon as we require them to interact on an adult level. They are emotional toddlers! They really don't give us a choice but to discard them since they can't deal with anything anyway. Great video. Thanks so much and keep up the good work!
After 34 years of pain, abuse, and cheating….I’m discarding HIM. He has a belief that we’ll end up “friendly exes” as is the hot new way to be that’s flaunted over social media. ZERO chance, he doesn’t believe me, but zero chance. He’s taught me well of what I can expect from a relationship with him.
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
Very good point. Kevin. They can't discard you if they never regarded you in the first place. So true. And that they seem to take the path of least resistance. The moment you begin to question things, the devaluation will commence.
+That One Chris yes that is absolutely right. The moment Things become difficult and they know that you're questioning things, they start to look for more Supply or they start to put you down. This is where it's best to discard them because you do not need the drama arguing and yelling or fighting in your life
It was so hard but I discarded him....I didn't want to, but my health and sanity was at stake! Now that I've been free from my narc for a year....I see things very clearly. Thank you for all your videos ...they have been helping me on my journey of healing!
I didn't know what narcissist was, I thought for years that it was being selfish, OMG it's so much more. Then I thought this person is just Evil. Unless you live with evil you will never know what Evil truly is. I've been surrounded by these people all my life but I had no idea what Narcissist was. I didn't find out about this Word,or behavior until I was 55 yrs old. Dang that sucks, but now I do. Thanks for validating that for me.
This video really helped me understand and reassure myself that standing up for myself is what made him give me the silent treatment. Asking him to respect me and give back like have done seem to be impossible for him to understand. Anyways im on a emotionally healing journey right now don't need no more toxicity in my life.
"going no contact is not a game. Going no contact is not just something you do temporarily." Thanks a lot! I needed to hear these words. Glad you mentioned it to us, the all narc survivors As for the thousand time I am being stalked again, -_- and I truly don't even want to feel pity about that emotional abuser anymore ... Just wanted to make sure how the discard should be done from my side. I choose to go no contact, forever
I wish I could be but something inside me is really frighten. Idky. I feel like since I been with him I've lost lots of weight and lost alot of self esteem, and my health is really down now, now I feel like if he leaves its over for me.
Hey Kevin! I know this video was from a while ago, but I wanted to thank you so much for this message, which once again confirms that I did the right thing to have ended that toxic relationship. You said my exact words when I discarded. "I'm done." Those were my very words, and I meant what I said after 12 years of forgiving and hoping for change. All for nothing. I thank The Almighty for freeing me from the abuse and from the sadness. I am almost 8 months free and I am past the pain, but dealing with the regret that I hung in there for so long. Thanks for reminding me: I TRULY DISCARDED I WAS/AM TRULY DONE I AM FREE! 💝
This is a brilliant analogy. The therapists say the narc discards you which they do...But it is up to you to make the final discard with the trash. Thanks for this explanation.
I discarded that creature after the push and pull back and forth, the pain was worse than labor pains I never felt that kinda of pain ever. I said if I stay I'll be hurting and if I go I will be hurting because I fell in love with the fake illusion in the end he was caught off guard with a Sheriff serving him with a restraining order it's been a year since I left that train wreck of a facade!
Shar Hughes . Congratluations. Individuals with NPD or toxic individuals will continue to grow because no one is holding them responsible. I really would love to see how many folks on these sites have the same abuser.. Folks should at least identify the Narc using an initial, F or M, and state.. Disgarding is mental ( agreed.) But, what happens to the next individual? They're not being addressed and therefore, society is assisting with the increase of poison being distributed in the community..
i set boundaries with a narcissist about coming over to my house unnanounced and parking illegally in front of my house he disregarded my request multiple times, then he came over to my house when i wasn't home snooping around in my backyard. Then he showed up late in the evening unannounced. i told him to leave and he threw a tantrum "I'm never coming over again" I said "good". then i texted him a picture of my no tresspassing sign. the next day he called me swearing and hung up. "I texted him blocking your number permanently" It felt so good to finally be free of him. years of pain and problems. and now i can heal and not worry that this dude considers me a place he can just show up anytime when he needs something. absolutely no regard for me, my requests or boundaries. I'm hoping this is the final discard.
+Ted Myrrh you're absolutely right, they have no regard or respect for you. This is why the decision to discard is yours. And it's for your own protection
Ted Myrrh I wouldn’t suggest trying to beat them at their own egoic game. Just get boring and they’ll go away and leave you alone. If you need the drama of the aftermath there’s something you need to deal with. I wish I had done it a lot smarter.
Ted ... this is typical. Mine plays the good Christian - he was seeking enlightenment and became a reborn and had a new baptism after his girlfriend died - whom he probably killed with his abuse. So yeah.... they do this kind of shit to appear like the "good" man... they go to church, join a religion, help in the community and volunteer. Not because they have a conscience but to maintain their false self.
Can't wait till I overcome, heal and move forward. To be again, Full of life, self-love, & the will or motivation too be in your head-space. Thank you Kevin. Words can't express how welcoming and on point your knowledge is... Its crazy how you break them down to the T.... I love you brother thank you!! Please never stop sharing the world needs to be aware. Bless u!
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
OMFG, I never thought to flip the narrative on discarding, such as you did. This has been the single most helpful comment in all the videos I’ve seen on NPD and being discarded. Thanks so much. You rock!
I met a Narc about 4 months ago, already had the love bomb, and the other stuff now we are at the Discard, him responding to my text with "ok", "great", etc... He is mad because I told him that I'm on to his mental disorder lol now we are at the Discard! well i'm so over it, I'm too strong for him and I agree 100% with this video. These people are weird as hell, they move way too quickly and if you really look back the warning signs were right in front of you day 1! I think it's interesting that these people are so obvious and weak! I now just want to pick on him but he aint that interesting enough to waste any more of my time. sad that he has to lie his way through life and biggest joke is I always call him out so I know he had to throw me in the trash!!! I'm too woke for him lol
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
Before I knew what a narcissist was I was super disturbed by the false accusations he kept making at me and asked if he had a diagnosis he hadn’t disclosed… then came sleep deprivation waking me up to interrogate me over more false accusations before the discard shortly thereafter
This has provided me with that light bulb moment that I’d been looking for after months of research. I was so focussed on discard I hadn’t even looked at ‘regard’ and you are so right there actually was none, not in 28 years! I feel free to move forwards now knowing that it wasn’t discard it was just staying the same - no regard equals no discard. I chose to walk away for me and I’m so grateful to have discovered this today - Thank you 🙏🏻
Will you just marry me so I wont have to go thru this madness anymore ? 😚 Yes, Kevin ! I get you. With a narcissist, theres NO such thing as a "discard". The discard really is just a way of threatening you into submission. Its really just that. The stonewalling/silent treatment that follows is nothing but a wait-it-out game. Theyll be back before you can say narcissist. Some Narcissists come back within a few weeks, months and some hoover even after YEARS with excuses like " youre the only one I ever thought abt all these years ". So WE'RE the ones doing the discarding cause WE decide its FINAL, GAME OVER! They KEEP coming BACK AGAIN and AGAIN. The discard really doesnt mean its over for these people. In fact, Id say its only the beginning ! Theyre only getting warmed up folks. Its a 7 course meal and we're only at the starters. Take whatever you have and get OUT. I was discarded. I struggled to see it for what it is at first but its been 2 months and Ive made considerable progress and I feel so much happier. There are some days that Im down when I think abt what happened but its slowly fading away to the back of my head. Thank you, Kevin. video, great input ! Ive learned so much.
I know right lol. I just started watching this guy and I thought why can't I meet a guy like this? I'm scared that the next one I meet will be a narcissist. I will know the red flags but still it's scary to think that there are people out there who want to just take take take and destroy us 😢💔
@@melissajones2377 The fact that you're saying this shows how much better you are than most people. Jesus said that the MEEK shall inherit the earth... Not the egotistic!
I realized after 3 years I was wrapped up with a narcissist. I actually left Pennsylvania and moved to Wisconsin to disconnect. I’m still struggling. I focus on only on myself to find happiness again
I discarded my narc after 44+ year marriage. Yes, 44+ years! It took 8 months after filing for divorce for me to escape due to his extreme financial abuse. Now I am independent, happy & building true friendships. He suffered such a narc injury. He became even more abusive when I did not back down & followed through with my exit strategy that he is now in ruins, physically, mentally & financially to the point that he is now in a sexual relationship with my much younger sister. SICK! I'm certainly not enjoying his state of mind, however I refuse to break NO contact.
Thank you so much for this video. After my divorce 4 years ago being married for 21 years, I had great GUILT feelings for discarding an abusive relationship even to the point of thinking that I had narcissist characteristics, because I stepped out of the abusive relationship and marriage. After listening to your message on this video I can truly say I've put it in perspective now, not beating myself up for being the one discarding the situation and person I was married to.
Survivor OfMany hopefully your extended family will have little to no contact with you. Remain nc and don’t answer the door even if they see your car outside, just seen you walk in the house, or at your job.
Dynasty Of 3 Thank You! Trust me they aren’t showing up. They moved states & I didn’t know. Never called to tell me my bro passed from an od end of Jan. I know The weight my mom put on his shoulders re me. I didn’t know he was that bad. It’s just so fd up! I wanted better for our ds. She taught me what NOT to do as a mom. I’m grateful for that.
Dynasty Of 3 No extended fam .. we don’t have any family in this huge state. I rarely feel super sad for me.. it’s our only ds I feel for. We moved when he was 4. I noticed my mom egging him on around 5yo. I lost my only bro to an accidental od end of Jan. I knew of his habit a yr before. You can’t make this crap up! My bro was the only one who stayed to live at home w his wife. My parents packed up & headed to Fla when we left home in 2011. I quit drinking the kool aide when our ds was 5. So about 8yr ago. Never even heard from my parents about my own bro. That’s messed up right? If our son went NC I’d be banging his door down. Idk It’s all so surreal. I mourn who I thought they were in my mind more. No record on loop for our ds. I left off where they stopped! Thank you!
Survivor OfMany it is really messed up that your parents didn’t even notify you of your brother and you are right that if my kids went missing for a hour I would be in panic even if they were old. Sometimes being away from the extended family is best. My sister just hovered me the other day after ghosting for a year. Didn’t even stop to say hello but just crept down the street. My ex did this the previous week but he didn’t come to my house but just turned around at a few houses down. The reach out of his hovering was limited to Gmail and I just learn how to block him from it completely. When he would talk to our kids it would be to play carry on at his funeral. Very toxic and negative. He has a family with his cousin, 2 kids that his narc family would always joke about to p me off. Then lie like it was false. I can’t have my kids around that environment, if you are breeding with your cousins then I know that your own kids are not off limits. So believe me, I understand how disturbing a narcissist and their family can be. Hopefully our days will get better sooner than later.
Survivor of many, same here. I just turned 41 and went no contact with my mom and sister 7 months ago... My Dad filed divorce just recently too. No contact is the only way.. I couldn't understand why my mom and sister can be so calculated and just mean. But 41 years later it's true. We just can't see it because you and I wouldn't ever treat someone like they have us.
Thanks, for clarifying the "narcissist's discard" myth. You make it clear that we are the ones in control of such a powerful act which puts us in ultimate control of the situation. Dealing with a narc is too draining, almost debilitating... after many years of abuse I couldn't take it anymore. Since I discarded my narcissistic husband, I've been feeling ENERGIZED! I'm 61 but I feel as young as I look! Your toddler is so adorable! I laughed when you told him "No-no, you gotta be professional here."
I discarded my narc family 2 yrs ago and holding strong!! I discarded a long time friend 6 mos ago because he took sides with them against me! One shows up about every 2 mos, I won't answer my door, I'm totally done with all of them period!!
Hi Lori Ackerman ...my name is MELISSA AND CONGRATULATIONS 🎈🍾🎉 ON discarding ALLLLLLLL OF THEM. That’s amazing ..!!! Head up girl . Great job. I’m not there quite yet but I will be. I KNOW IT..thanks for sharing
It took a long time to learn: if someone I didn't invite is at my door, they want something that will be good for them, and bad for me. Done. Not available.
Lori Ackerman my best friend and in law of 30+ years turned against me on my son’s wedding day last year. No reason ever given. She then bombarded me with hateful, vile comments about my character and convinced ALL of my husbands family to ignore us. She didn’t even tell my husband their mum suddenly died whilst visiting her. I think of her every day, wondering what I did or didn’t do to cause this. I don’t understand how these people I’ve spent most of my life with can turn their backs on us. I honestly hate their actions but the hurt at being rejected is so painful. I’ve had no contact with any of them, but wish someone would just explain why this happened.
This is one of the best and most helpful videos I have seen! Thank you so much! You have made me feel so much better about the “discard” and I feel empowered for finally moving on. Thank you again for these videos!!!! 🙏
Something I’ve learned is that NARCISSISTS ALWAYS HAVE TO FEEL IN CONTROL WHEN THE RELATIONSHIP ENDS! My experience: the lovebomb stage was over and I was getting fed up of how negative and contemptuous my narc boyfriend was being towards everyone. He was also putting a lot of pressure on me, telling me how to do my makeup and what clothes to wear. I told him I didn’t see a point in continuing the relationship. He goes silent for a few minutes. Then VERY QUICKLY, he turns around and says we’ll have to call it at that then. Trying to reframe the situation and make it look like HE was calling the shots. He became very cold and said a lot of very cruel things like it never meant anything to him anyway, I was just a notch in his bedpost etc. He basically needed to make it seem like the breakup was HIS idea.
I was raised in an extremely narcissistic family, so I ended up marrying a narcissistic man. Stayed in the marriage for 14 years, left the marriage; but still not realizing that I was being a victim of narcissistic people. After that I met a young man who portrayed himself like a better option but ended up being even more narcissistic. Finally I realized that it takes time to heal from that type of treatment from people like this. When youre vulnerable you end up getting involved in similar relationships. I think that is very important to recover first and regain self empowerment.
I am 68 years old and only recently realizing the full extent of how many narcissists have been in my life and the damage it has caused. The most difficult to accept as truth is my daughter, the only living child I have left. Denial is real. Thank you for your channel. I think you are helping a lot of people.
So needed to hear this. I wrote down all the feelings he made me feel, then ripped it up and threw it away so that I feel I have consciously dumped all the toxic waste and am no longer carrying that negativity he brought into my life with me any longer.
Thank you for sharing! 20 plus years living through what I finally realize was a one way road. I’m done and looking forward to the next chapters of life😊
Thank you so much for your page. It's really helping me through my healing from a 2 year narcissistic and abusive relationship after my ex ghosted me about 1 month ago. I have literally been crying everyday for the last month, but like you said, I am purging. You are speaking my truth and helping me to reclaim my power.
Great way to look at it. Married to the narc over 18 years. He announced on our daughter's 17th birthday that he had someone else but he was not leaving. Oh no. He would just stay at her place on weekends because that was more convenient for him! Can't imagine what he told her! No contact for 12 months now except through lawyers. Some say I should bury the hatchet for the kids, now 18 & 16. His family has cut them off almost completely. The new woman has kids the same age and it seems they have just been replaced. Really weird.
It’s not weird. Most narcissists begin to ignore their own children from their first marriage, in favor of the new wifey’s children. Even if they lived with the biological children for over a decade. Kids are left heartbroken. It’s the oldest story in the book.
I binged on your videos all weekend after discarding a narc. I realized that in most of your videos, halfway through you say "now stay with me on this" and that's when the aha moment comes. You have a gift in that you make your points so clearly and speak in such a concise manner. Every word has meaning. And I love that your situation is not about a love interest, it's about family which helps me apply your concepts to everyone in my life, not just the men I fall for. My mother is your mother lol...I am attracted to depressed, alcoholic souls just like my mom; I want so bad to be the one to help them after years of consoling my mom and her sadness. I was pretty confused before I figured that out after one of your videos. I am going to sign up for your Online Course, can't wait to dig in. Thanks so much Kevin!
I just got the revelation this morning. It is true I have to discard all that is in me all the hate, anger , resentment, confusion, mental anguish, desperation, feeling worthlessness, feeling devalue, cheated, even feeling devalue, even feeling like garbage. Now I know I disengage. From evil. I thought in my mind he discarded me. But thank God again for the truth. I am being set free. I am crying again. This is bringing heeling over my mind. I was thinking he rejected me. But it is not true. I rejected the lies and deception . that is why he can't stay around me. Praise God.
And if they marry you, they’ll carry on with being their horrible, infidel selves now that they have a license to do their antics whilst the society thinks they’re a normal citizen of the society.
I clicked on this on accident no joke and I cant stop crying it hit home in so many ways. I have become anxious depressed and sucidal due to this relationship idk how to just leave I am tired exhausted I need the strength to leave. Pray for me
This was so spot on. I could relate to everything you were saying down to a T. Absolutely incredible. As soon as I was unable to provide for him he found a way to leave me. Here I foolishly thought and hoped he would step up to the plate and finally lead in responsibility and I would see how much he wanted me. My romantic heart still wanted to believe in the best of him. But like you said, they are only doing what they've ever done. And that's to float along and ride on the coat tails of others to get whatever it is they want. So as sad as I've been to accept my new reality, which is a life without him, I need to consider myself blessed that the toxicity and drama are no longer a part of my day to day life. Now comes the work of purging the guck that remains in my head, body and heart.
The Royal We I appreciate you as well. Even though we have never met I wanted you to know you've helped me through some difficult times by sharing your wisdom and experience. Thank you. And as sad as it is to know there are so many that have experienced similar abuse by these Narcassistic people in our lives, it's also healing to have someone like you helping so many of us and to know we aren't alone. 💜
My narc has the illusion of having the perfect relationship. But has yet discovered that you have to both work for it. He has gone out in the streets to tarnish my name. And then has been telling me that nobody else will want me.
Mine ended with a harrassment t charge and I loved him . He wouldn’t stop because I had left because my daughter was suicidal . I had to get away and save her . He tried to get Me to come back by ruining my career and drugging me and I caught it but he still said he was reporting it to the board of nursing I panicked for 3 months worried about hair follicle test . He just starting hating me I didn’t get it he turned off her phone when I told him she attempted suicide and I was on way home to her and she wasn’t answering and then he turned off the lights . We did have a wonderful relationship at one time like a love story and he changed
I am 4 years removed and healed from the narcissist but this video helped me understand who and what I was involved with. Just WOW! I never knew... We do have a child together. It keeps me in prayer. Thanks so much for this.
Thank you for providing a more positive and hopeful take on explaining how this type of persons abuse effects people and how a person could combat that! So many people who speak about narcissist I feel, give them too much power. You are empowering people!
I needed to hear this! Thank you! My ex is a narcissist. Thank you for helping me see the light at the end of this emotional & mental abuse I have endured. You're a God send to each one of us going through this difficult time. It's good to see support on you tube for people like me that need help in understanding narcissist's.
Brilliant insight....i did inner child trauma on my worth...ran for my life to treatment...WOWED Kevin🙏 grief stage now...loss of self is intense loss...im coping...going in deep waters...but SAVED self...
I NEEDED to watch this SO BAD right at this moment in my life. I took notes and will remind myself daily of the Conscious level exercise if Discarding my ex with all my power. Thank you !!
I'm listening from greece....I've been depressing all these traumas and everything came out... to the point thinking I was the crazy one😢and now I'm to the level "I'm done"...from both sides of my family toxic 😕 I already asked help...I reached the last stage that I need.... that hand up that you said in another video...that it's ok to let them go and move on....I'm blessed though I have my husband and my friends to keep me in sanity...your videos really helped me today, and I believe so many people find courage from you....thank you for sharing these priceless advises....God bless you 🙌🙏🤍
I just came across your videos today. They have given me such a fresh perspective. Ive been suffering for months through the silent treatment and feeling discarded. The psychological mind games have been very painful and watching him act as though i never existed.
I've been discarded about 4 months ago by my ex GF and ran into her 2 months ago and we both acted very indifferent. We've been together ten years and we broke up several times. I always went back to her only days or weeks. But not this time. I know that if I get back, this will be a self destroying action. I hope I will never give in and try to get her back. She happens to live in the same neighborhood, and I am even thinking about moving not to see her again. Loneliness is very hard and all, but the abuse I got from her was so frustrating... Thanks for your video man !!!
I am on board with ‘no contact’! We have children, but I totally get this concept and it is working well despite him using children as tools of manipulation. Now teaching children how to protect themselves w/o resentment because they see/know truth too.
Tamara Garrett : I have two adult boys from previous relationship. I have two girls with me from this toxic marriage; 9yrs & 4yrs. The 9yr old sees it and gets it; 4yr old is seeing it but still is manipulated despite she has said she doesn’t like it. As mom right now, I manage everyday life stuff, my therapy, kids therapy, CPA investing, and his supervised visits w/ girls, oh yeah...court dates too! It is busy, hard, and expensive....I know this moment is temporary and must go through in order to be free. It is worth it! I can and I will !!! I am patient w/ girls, glad to have them, show them love, ensure them they are safe ...children know truth.
The most important thing that I do daily: Instead of looking at what he is doing and saying; I choose to focus on my truth. What am I doing and saying. I decided to write my own narrative. He does not define who I am. I do; by my choices. I choose forgiveness & freedom through Jesus! Amen!
Tamara Garrett : There is an app called Family Wizard that I will be allowed to use under court order and the attorneys can monitor it and use it if necessary in court. It will track kids schedules and document all communication between ex and myself; therefore, communication is strictly about kids and no contact with me personally...like a business transaction.
Yes, the victim always controls the final discard. I finally did this to my ex narcissist after several breakups initiated by him. And it is final, also I will never give that thing one ounce of supply no matter how much meanness or hoovering ect. It has now moved on to another victim.
All he did was hurt me, but now I have to get therapy after all the false hope. He said the L-Word a million times, but discarded me for the third time. Evil, is all that he is. I gave him time, money, and energy with nothing to show for. It's almost a new year, and I need a change of scenery. Keep me in your prayers!
We were in love with a lie. I have spent 17 years with a monster who pretended to be a sweet little lamb. I gave my best love everything I had, and everything I got back was rotten, looking back the verbal emotional and physical abuse, was unbearable. Thank you for your video as I am about to go through my final discard. He is leaving me with bare cupboards no gas, etc etc. This is going to be so extremely hard on me but with God's help I am going to take this final step, to my freedom.
Spot on! I went through this recently with a Borderline. When I started recognizing the pattern of being the best friend in the world to being the enemy the next minute.....after it happened 3 times with the 3 day silent treatment in between each devaluing phase...I was done!!! I'm not going to have anymore one sided relationships where I'm always expected to be there for a person who is never there for me.
Day 14 NC I finally talked to you and I appreciate your time. Thank you for listening I appreciate it. Conversation With A Narcissist: 12 things to Look Out For Joanna Kujath. This is what I delt with for 22 years. Thanks so much. Sorry for confusion this message is for Kevin.
thank you so much , your videos are helping me through getting over the narcissist. I’ve watched multiple videos on TH-cam but yours speak the most to me. I’ve been binge watching for two hours
Same here. I have listened to many others who were very informative and helpful but this man is blowing me away!!!!! I have only listened to 3 of his videos but I believe he is going to change my life!
When they discard you, they are literally just putting you on a shelf for later use. It’s up to you to stay on that shelf.
👑❤️
Yes, mine told me once he discarded me maybe we can get ourselves together than come back together ! 🤣🤦🏽♀️ yeaa now he’s married , cause he knows no matter what, he can’t come back here no more !!!!
Lol mine said "we can still be friends" after she berated me while I was at work unfriend me on Facebook and implies "wE cAn sTilL bE fRienDs" like really?? They are so self centered it's ridiculous literally right after break up they say this and they break up with me while at work do shit to hurt me then act like I was a issue and inconvenience to their life when they literally asked me out flattered me love bomb then dropped that bomb but they act like I it was all me I'm the problem and " wE cAn sTiL bE fRienDs" they are so beside themselves it's rodiculous
Up Yours I truly know the feeling trust me.
Nope! Stay OFF that shelf. You're not a can of beans. MOVE ON!
They suck your energy in a way that you’re not able to recognize yourself after that.
True.
Very, very true.
So true.
Truth☝️
It hurts to come to the realization that the ONLY WAY to stop hurting is to get far away from them😢it's the only way you can heal.💔
+Shawna Deyo yes it is the only way to heal
So True but it came with a price. I went through anxiety, depression and anger only because every time I tried to break off the 2 year relationship she retaliated with threats and filed four restraining orders on me for every four times I tried getting away. Now I have to get a lawyer because she made me lose my gun license and my job. She lied to the judge saying I grabbed her which I never would do and attacked my moral character. All four police reports justify "no physical contact" but the liberal judge granted her a restraining order with no proof. Oh well, at least she's out of my life so I can move on and become a stronger person. Good Luck all....You'll need it.
So true I'm in the WORST PAIN cause all of my raped are in my head? I can't be around an entity that makes me wanna die! All I wanna do is want to die! All he did was play games this whole time! I have so much tension & pressure of anger that I'm not allowed to show!
I do not need this toxic
DEATH-lationship!
Yes indeed
... When you discard toxic and narcs in your life your skin will glow people will wonder what is your secret !!!!!! Trust me i have been there before ... Trauma has affected my life in many forms and sizes..... The moment you eradicate toxic folks in your life ,is the moment you will become the best version of yourself ..... I just turned twenty eight.....iam indeed in love with myself ...alack of self love is the root cause of all suffering in this universe..... Don't chase people , be yourself , do your own thing and work hard , i mean work smarter , what i mean by working smarter is technology, mentor and education and then the right people will come to you and stay ....take care and God bless you ..
@@kennethblack8356 oh my god same to me.. but i didn't get convicted yet.. but if she doesn't get her way,, shed start a fight cal 911.... and lied so id go to jaul.. but when i called 911 first and she scratched me so hard,, it drew blood.. the police asked me to leave my own house for a hotel.. police report was filed.. but i had no idea what a pfa was? its a nightmare that I am still living.. How do they get away with such crap... ? i havenet even mentioned the loan scams and forging signatures on loans...
When you discard them first they up the abuse to a whole new level , be careful people , no contact is the only way , these evil predators are insane and want to make you insane too, it almost worked I did loose my mind now I’m on meds to keep me stable , the damage they do to your life and health is the stuff nightmares are made off
YES..... ...me2 but seriously fuck the meds.......try the adaptogenic herbs they r bitchen.......i got a shit load of them from Dragon herbs in tincture form then took high doses n it really is fucking heavenly.......& healthy.......meds r made by fucking narcs......they your tire animals so pull it together n get the catalogue it's free & then pick out what sounds great........ok........want u free n happy 😊
My narc told me my brain didn't work every single day! Wouldn't stop.
@@millsanais5364 A nice hybrid cannabis strain should do it. All about the herbals.
I am right there with you grateful to still be alive. Grateful to be done with these monsters. The Big Bad Wolf begone with you now and forever. C yeah
The one thing I have done right.. I always get to the spot with all these freaks that I know it's over. And I take action. Mind you a little slow:-). But I'm awake and moving ever so slowly forward.
If they owe you money - you may never hear from them again. Be happy about that.
He wanted me to lend him $10k 😶
I was way dumber than that I wish that was all it was! JR@@elenar7836
Yup mine owes me so much money. I'm pretty sure he's gone for good this time
😂❤
Discard = Disregard. If you're fortunate enough to be discarded by a narcissist, consider yourself "lucky." I liken it to a cat catching a mouse or a bird and torturing it while sadistically toying with it. Then suddenly s/he becomes bored with it and lets it go. Are you lucky? You betcha! 🐀🐦🐺
+Peace Joy oh I wouldn't give narcissists that much power. If it's a cat and mouse story, then it's best to be like an episode of Tom and Jerry. Because in these stories, the mouse gets away every time. And that's how you and I need to be. Able to get away, powerful and strong enough to outsmart the cat.
@The Royal We: Kevin, your point is well taken...BUT, why go back to the cat playing this 'cat and mouse' game? If I'm to be honest with myself, I was tortured by my narcs and left for dead. When I returned to them (thinking this time things would be different), they gladly took me back only to re-torture me again. So now that I've learned my lesson, I discard them before they discard me, and don't give it a second thought. But in the event that they're covert and discard me first, I simply smile and say, "Thank you! You just did me a favor," and never return or look back. Playing games with a narcissist is a waste of my precious time. I'd rather play with my loyal dogs.
Absolutely, the point of this video is to remind you that you have the power to discard.
@The Royal We: Yes, and thank you for that reminder--I've finally learned my lesson. But sometimes my empathetic nature causes me to hang on longer than I should...BUT, I'm working on it.😊
Girl, I was too busy feeling ”I was in love, brokenhearted & lamebrained ” to realize that being ”discarded” was a dodged bullet. Today, having such an informed & educated understanding of what a narcissist is, what their behavior is like & why...I feel like a brilliant mad scientist who can dissect a narcissist on sight. Oh, such power!🤨
When I feel upset and find myself ruminating about the narc and the new supply, I try to remind myself, 'she is entering the cycle I am leaving.' Make it your mantra. Much strength to you all
Thank you for this
Thank you so much for this
LOL.
@@stardustsparkles22 U MISS HIM?
@@shauna9672 no. Not really. Not now.
I realized that a narcissist can discard you even without leaving your house. A narcissist will have multiple supplies during the day, come home very late, leave very early, have children with other supplies and keep top secrets.
I have all the same as u but I found she has full blown witch craft against my life with discarding our children death threats a a few thousand customer s she sexually makes money with cash apps an private social profiles it was hard to figure all this out towards her end
Yes. My husband never came home at all every night! He said it was because I was such a bitch! But.....he did it from day 1. 🤔
Wow. Has this all been your experience?
💯💯💯💯💯
Yup.
Secretly gay .. But way more...brutal... S and m...
I discarded my narc on my birthday. Best present I gave myself. Goodbye to the Jezebel evil spirit. No contact, deleted, him and his toxic family. #byefelicia
Good for you. They are monsters who feel no remorse.
🙏😂 mine dragged our child & I to his daddy's to 4ever live w/his Narc cult in craphole wyoming but 3 weeks in I packed what I could & we fled overnight😂 It's sure creeeepy being forced to watch in laws pat his head and ignore what a shit he is! Our teen was so relieved to go back to California
Now we call him daddy's boi his ego is shattered his fantasy seemed to b to seclude ME there as his doll to puff his image and that I'd b QUIET 😂😂😂😂
Yes! I am done being blamed, accused, manipulated then rejected by my narc. We can do this guys.
You need to control the final discard and go absolutely no contact, whatever it takes! Its all about power and control and i ain't giving up my power no more
That's why I chose. This nicname, so I could control the final, my choice
check mate good for you i wish u all the best! Just make sure u build up allies that u can trust unequivocally cause Lord only knows what they are really capable of and to what levels they are willing to stoop! U are a inspiration❤️🙏 Make the rest of your life the best of your life!
check mate I am not trying to be mean or judgmental but when you have children they are your top priority at all times and if you’re in a relationship with an abusive partner especially one who exposes your children to abuse or is abusive to them directly or they have to watch a person be abusive to you, why would you stay so long? I got rid of my Narc after 3 months only went back to him once for a month and as soon as the inappropriate behavior and verbal abuse started again I left and never looking back. I don’t even have kids I just know I’m worth more than this but had I had kids he would have never lasted more than a month the second his horrible behavior surfaced I would be gone because I would never want my kids to be exposed to that. It’s still hard I miss the good times I had with my Narc but I know that anytime he was nice it was fake and that he never truly loved me as he said he did. Your children should always come first before anyone since their father isn’t with you. Your job to protect them and if I were you I would date someone quite awhile before I brought my child around them. Sorry I just don’t understand exposes kids to these monsters as soon as the person acts up in front of my kids he would be gone.
Cozette M .. not judgemental, but I was that way dating in past, I knew this demon when we were kids.. my 1st best friend, 1975-82, we reconnected when we were 41... . I was love bombed (built on that childhood friendship ) , he was also a single dad, yes I love his twins, The depths that this creature went to bring me and my kids in, traveling to see me, moving us 950 miles back to home state, so no not judgemental, just "you haven't walked in my shoes " Point though We are free, my youngest is 19... his poor kids still there with him cause mother is scared of him are 16...
Cozette M Good for you! So glad u are out now! U are absolutely right your kid should be your number one priority however i am financially dependent on the narc for a roof over my head etc and have been so isolated by him over the years! He can give my son everything that i am not able to, also my boy has been so brainwashed that i am the biggest looser on planet earth that i fear its too little to late and he is also now abusive towards me at 13 years old! My son adores his father and loves him dearly so i need to respect that. 💜🙏
I discarded him about 16 months ago. Then after a whole year he started called and leaving messages. He wants me back, I was the best woman in his life (that was the truth), can’t we just forget about old problems and move on together. Blah blah blah. I never respond so now the messages also include that he keeps calling but I don’t respond. Yep! So glad that I am hanging tough. He was the love of my life I thought but after the cheating ,the lies etc. , I realize life alone is much more peaceful and cheaper too!!,
+Jane Vrabel thank you so much for watching. I'm glad that this video
Jane Vrabel peaceful and cheaper is right!
In my case it was me who was trying to call her one year after she discarded me. There was a lot of stuff which I didnt understand in her behavior (didnt know she is a narcissist at that time) so I just wanted to clear some things and didnt want to be rude at her or get her back. She did not pick the phone but after 2 days she sent me sms and make me look like Iam that one who is a total narcissist. I have never met with so "lack of understanding" for other human beings she showed me. Bleh... These people always think when you want to discuss with them something or you are angry at them that you must either love them or you are envy of them and cant move on and live your own life, but never because they did something bad... And finally they beg you for letting them live their own lives so they look like the good ones in front of the others... lol
Jane Vrabe
Jane Vrabel I’m so proud of you for realizing what he was doing to you.
Last night my husband told me he's found someone else. I So needed this today. This is Truth!
Sherry Moreno,your story touched my heart 💓😪
Did he come back and Hoover you?
If his mode of operation is similar to my ex he was always on the make. But watch out he could easily try to squeeze back in. No change in him but make the insult disappear. And just say no.
I did the discard and yes I did genuinely love him but I took control and discarded him! That makes me feel amazing! Very empowering!!!
I just did that today and I'm so happy
I discarded him first too and he went nuts!
F do o not go back to him! He will punish you for leaving
facts 😆
My narcissists husband and me were together for 35 years.
I discarded him, no contact and asked him to leave the house.
4 months on still in no contact.
Best feeling to knock them out of the game.
You have no idea how badly I needed to hear this right now. Not about me choosing to make it the final discard, but consciously deciding to discard the toxic waste from my life. Every time he pops up in my head again I’m going to make this my mantra. Thank you! Today is one month since he went silent and two weeks since I blocked him everywhere. It was a blessing in disguise but now I’m dealing with the hurt, the anger, the humiliation….so much that it’s making me miserable. I don’t want him back. I want him out of my head, my heart and my life. I choose to discard this toxic waste from my head, my body and my life.
I finally managed to get rid of my narcissist after 12 years of pain. Everything you say is right. I am happy now I am free of all the lies and mind games. Life is good.
Sharon McCarthy,I'm so happy for you ☺️cause you are happy now🤙
So glad u did this even thou it took time.. But u will get there eventually xxx
Also 12 years here but I am having trouble getting out :(
@@DizzyWolf me too 12. Years ,i will be done soon , we have to scape before they will drive us to be crazy
Thank you. 13 years here. Getting divorced now and we are in the discard stage. I wouldn’t still have s3x so he’s throwing me completely away. Cutting off all support. Praying it’s over soon. He’s already looking for new woman
Discard is such a painful thing to go through. For me, it's ruined any trust I had in love and relationships. I am now that traumatized person expecting to be used and left behind. I can't tell if someone is really into me or just pretending and using me. I guess I'm sorting of running from intimacy and finding someone new because I'm too scared to get hurt again. I don't know how to change that, but I suppose right now I'll take loneliness over pain.
Same 🙁
Me too I now chose jesus christ and living for him
agreed - narcissism is such an epidemic. I try now to ensure i can recognize the signs of narcissism early and keep myself from going too far down a path with certain people.
Is that you in the profile pic I'm just curious
@@pusher1012000 lol, no it's a TH-camr called foodie beauty
I literally cried watching this because I was thinking of what I went through with the narc and is so glad I found the strength to discard him. He just took, gaslighted, gave me silent treatments, broke up with me several times then asked me to take him back every time. No appearance came without a pity party. He made me feel horrible about myself and crazy only to leave me with nothing but a broom to clean up the mess he made...the broken pieces of my heart. I've moved on and hope that SOB stay gone!
+Kimberly Bellamy thank you so much for watching hun. These people will continue to ask you to come back into their life in one way shape or form. This is exactly why I made this video, in order to be able to say enough is enough
The Royal We Thank you!!! Your videos are truly a blessing.
Only you can ensure he stays gone. 🙏
Hey Kimberly Bellamy ...Melissa here ...CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR STRENGTH AND RESILIENCE TO GO NO CONTACT. BU T
wow sounds like my story with my NARC but I have come to realize while watching and learning that my exNarc was. A psychopath as well. Which is a double WAMMY .so I have two ?? (If that’s ok) how long did it take for u to heal and when and what did u do to stop blaming & beating yourself up ..?? Everyday I still hear the words the. Gas lighting the flying monkeys and their dumb shit ...it still hurts..when does it go away does it ever go away. And do u believe they get there KARMA..???
Hey funny thing is my ex Narc has really discarded me.YUP lol REALLY HE DID AND If COURSE IMMEDIATELY SUPPLY WHEN IT HAPPENED (6months ) now. And he has NEVER ASKED TO COME BACK ..told me everyday what a loser and whore I WAS ...and quoted actually
He never would come back because all I did was ruin his life. .i would love to compare of the LIST HE. HAS AN REAL LIST OF WHAT EACH-ONE OF US DID for EACHOTHER. Never happen. Just like their KARMA WILL NEVE HAPPEN. BECAUSE NOTHING WAS EVER THEIR FAULTS TO BEGIN WITH.
He discarded me and went back to the same girls he told me “not to worry about “ straight away 😂😂 it’s what they do, they need supply after supply.. but I’m getting stronger by the day and don’t want anything to do with him
Same here...he ghosted me few months back for his ex...broke up with her, came apologizing to me assuring me he will never go back to her...unfortunately i gave him a 2nd chance...and a month back he ghosted me again for the same girl!!!! Bullet dodged
Thats exactly what they do. Our intuition is spot on. All the girls be told me not to worry about were actually people I needed to worry about. Disgusting.
@@asteriamoon1817 Same. I can't believe I was so dumb. 18 months of my life I should have went with my gut. She is an awful human being
@@stephenhymesjr.9996 did you have that gut feeling,too?
@@asteriamoon1817 Yes! It was awful but she was so good at manipulation and lying she made me feel like I was just insecure and paranoid
They are easily bored, and when they triangulate....they get double ⛽️ fuel.
Play old supply against new supply....
Creates jealousy....makes them feel so important.
PATHETIC!
They also play their one and only sister vs the class A supply if they can see your getting close, it's not the sister that causes the chaos it's the narrcist trying to keep you separate, its jealousy, but the sister will always stand by the narc and play games even thoe they both dont talk emotions,they have none, they dont always have a knew supply, but they will talk with the opposite sex just to get a thrill.
@@lovelylinda8891 yes but it's happening with me
Happened. He actually said he’s having fun when I caught him cheating on Instagram and asked the other girl, who he has now married lol, about what’s up with them. They’re sick
@@servjeetsingh2379 I'm sorry this is happening to you. It happened to me too, it's a terrible and uncomfortable position to find yourself in. I meant these individuals that intentionally create these troublemaking and hurtful scenarios are pathetic. You deserve to be in a good space, not this bullshit.
Life with a narc is about addiction to them and their sick ways. You can be addicted to a person.
+Colleen yes you absolutely can
I was discard by someone,when it was time for him to carry out a promise and today I don't know why. He lied to me. It has been hard and has cause me a lot of pain. I am trying to get over it and move on. If I said or did something I wish he would at least told me, but he has gone silent treatment on me. Some time people can be so mean. But it is time with God help I move on and allow God to Bless my life with better.
Yes. I was hooked for many years, brainwashed,
Colleen . A person was the worst addiction I’ve ever experienced for a LONG time.... alcoholics and substance abusers talk about insanity and I couldn’t relate BUT when I apply it to THIS SPECIFIC person, I was very close to insanity. I had never been exposed to anyone like this in my life or thought process. Unreal.... and slowly moving forward - after several rounds of BS.
It's all crazy
You just taught us (the abused) who really is in control of the relationship. I've never heard it spoken about in this way. So beautiful. When we know our own value, because GOD values us, then we are the ones that have no use for the narcissist. The 'ball' is and always has been in our court! GOD BLESS You!!!!
+TruthBeTold777 yes and it's absolutely true you are in control of the relationship. This is the point you are in control of all of your relationships. Because you control what you do where you go who you talk to and how you talk. These are things that narcissist can never control unless we hand over that control.
You are absolutely right. If God is for us who can be against us . Gods love is totally satisfying to me , i dont need a man in my life. Praise Him, well Jesus is my man ! K
TruthBeTold777 , yes!!
Just wow this really help I thought I was crazy it's funny everything I went through our relationship ended because I asked him to open my door for me and treat me like a lady we had a big argument he gave me the silent treatment and then he broke up with me but looking at this video I realized he never treated me like a lady I had to keep asking for it and all of his needs we're being met I thought I was the narcissist because I was always taking care of him and tell him how much I did so I really was starting to believe that about myself but after watching this video I realize he has always treated me the same way I went back and look at old text messages when I was begging him to talk to me and where he would stand me up and it was always the same thing as it started to get hot outside I knew he was going to find a new Supply he just picked that little argument to end it why deal with it I don't want to open your door I don't want to treat you that way I'll just find someone else I'll get it now
Yeah, I'm agree it is better and clearly explained..
Great point Kevin as usual. Narcissists just leave us when they consider us as useless for them. And often reapper when they are out of supply. I have discarded my PN 5 weeks ago. After a 4 years relationship. And...since then my days have never been so peacefull! No more drama. No more manipulations. No more expectations and needs unmet. No more tears. I am slowly finding back my true self and the funny girl I used to be before walking on eggshells with him. And I know that life has wonderfull plans for me ;) Thanks Kevin for your usefull advices and kisses from the south of France.
Does "PN" mean "perpetual narcissist"?
@@cantstanja no it's mean "pervert narcissist" in France we call them "le pervers narcissique" because they are "pervert" and "narcissist".
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
Yasss they start out sweet somewhat giving and helpful then it stops and they expect you to continually treat them like a king well mine was a queen hello nah gonna tell me oh you use to bring me ice oh you use to give me massages now you complain and I barely ask you I did it in the beginning trying I come home every day after being on my feet 7/8hrs a day this chick has the nerve to tel me she doesn’t know how to do massages that’s why 😝 Chile please users and emotional abusers I fell back now she states: I changed I talk to her too aggressive I don’t cook everyday I don’t sexually please her… and im distancing myself she ask do I wanna be with her mind you after 4:5 mnths if so called being engaged I told her it’s not working again she says do you wanna be with me no I don’t so today we broke up when 4 days ago she gave each other back keys and now this and hellah accusing me why because she doing her that’s fine.. I won’t be a fool again I’ll stand my grown and don’t get sucked back in toxic emotional vamps and users
I was married to a narcissistic man for 27 years. He “discarded” me by moving out and divorcing me. I have often wondered if he would want me back if I groveled at his feet, lol. That’s not happening, but he lives just a mile away with his parents. No contact for 2 months now and I am happier than I have been since I can’t remember.
Kathy Haga,Good to hear that you are happy ☺️now🤙
Kathy, mine also moved out while I was at work, on Mother’s Day. Then he filed for divorce. I have to believe that means we won. James 4:7 says submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
I swear there’s got to be a Narc play by play book as so many of us have the same story??? I do not ever will understand this Massive Personality Disorder? I was so numb from years of abusive commentary that I did not believe the comments. Was raised to believe in myself… and even though I did not believe the ugliness he said at me it still ill affected me. I truly felt Horrible physically and mentally so now, I am rebuilding my life! Thank GOD!
@@itisfinishednowtimetoclean2723 My husband got a dv order which made me leave within 15 minutes. I'm sure he'll divorce me which is fine the only problem is I'm homeless. I'll be alright it will take some time and effort to get back up.
@@DOTMH_1 so sorry hun. I've been right where you are at. These people are heartless, soulless monsters. We did nothing to deserve such inhumane treatment. The sooner you leave, the sooner you heal. Hugs ❤
The comment about how they demean our character is so true, and more so when we did nothing wrong. And it hits you more in the brain as you can see crystal clear the hypocrisy of them being abusive and characterless and then projecting it all back onto you.
I'm glad I finally woke up. Blocked for good.
Yes. You're on point.
+T.Michele H thank you so much for watching I appreciate that
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
I'm on day 5. I caught him cheating after taking every kind of abuse from him. He tries to cover it up in my face. Lol..needless to say..I got my ass out of there with nothing but the clothes on my back. But, I'm free. 💕
Eva Green I just read your post about leaving your ex with nothing “but the clothes on your back”. I’m curious how the last year has been if you don’t mind me asking? Did he get you to go back did the cycles start again or did you truly discard the relationship? Thanks for taking the time. Jeff
It's sick how it has to come to that
Good on you !
Was he asking you to stay? Or he cheated coz he wanted to finish the relationship?
It's so true they start looking
for easier as soon as we require
them to interact on an adult level.
They are emotional toddlers!
They really don't give us a choice but
to discard them since they can't deal with
anything anyway. Great video. Thanks so much and
keep up the good work!
After 34 years of pain, abuse, and cheating….I’m discarding HIM. He has a belief that we’ll end up “friendly exes” as is the hot new way to be that’s flaunted over social media. ZERO chance, he doesn’t believe me, but zero chance. He’s taught me well of what I can expect from a relationship with him.
Got discarded today, this video gave me some relief. Thank you so much!
25yrs with a narcissist. 3 months nc. I'm so lucky to be "alive and well " thanks for all your great advice!
+Nereida Altamirano thank you so much for watching I appreciate you
Nereida Altamirano God Bless you 💜 He has Great plans for you 💜
God bless. 27 years and out about 10 months, still trauma bonded and it's been very difficult...
you are lucky, i was in hospital after 2 years with mine, i haven't been the same since, physically or mentally.
Please do a video on how they triangulate & create competition....
Take back your power discard their ass after they have discarded you especially when they come back after other sources of supply have failed.
+Diana Prince definitely I'm glad that you understood the point of this video.
So true
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
@@iniubongnkanga9390 is that an actual app
@@missfitphamous he is one of many spammers.
Very good point. Kevin. They can't discard you if they never regarded you in the first place. So true. And that they seem to take the path of least resistance. The moment you begin to question things, the devaluation will commence.
+That One Chris yes that is absolutely right. The moment Things become difficult and they know that you're questioning things, they start to look for more Supply or they start to put you down. This is where it's best to discard them because you do not need the drama arguing and yelling or fighting in your life
Exactly Kevin I’m tired of the toxicity
It was so hard but I discarded him....I didn't want to, but my health and sanity was at stake! Now that I've been free from my narc for a year....I see things very clearly. Thank you for all your videos ...they have been helping me on my journey of healing!
LMM,You don't need a narc 😈 in your life!!
I didn't know what narcissist was, I thought for years that it was being selfish, OMG it's so much more. Then I thought this person is just Evil. Unless you live with evil you will never know what Evil truly is. I've been surrounded by these people all my life but I had no idea what Narcissist was. I didn't find out about this Word,or behavior until I was 55 yrs old. Dang that sucks, but now I do. Thanks for validating that for me.
SNAP !!! BUT BETTER LATE THAN NEVER ....YOUR EMPATH DONT EVER CHANGE X
This video really helped me understand and reassure myself that standing up for myself is what made him give me the silent treatment. Asking him to respect me and give back like have done seem to be impossible for him to understand. Anyways im on a emotionally healing journey right now don't need no more toxicity in my life.
"going no contact is not a game. Going no contact is not just something you do temporarily."
Thanks a lot! I needed to hear these words. Glad you mentioned it to us, the all narc survivors
As for the thousand time I am being stalked again, -_- and I truly don't even want to feel pity about that emotional abuser anymore ...
Just wanted to make sure how the discard should be done from my side. I choose to go no contact, forever
I'm DONE!
"I'm done." That's what I said when I dumped him.
+Just Jameka well said thank you so much for watching
The Royal We
No problem! Thank you for posting another awesome thought provoking video!👍🏽
I wish I could be but something inside me is really frighten. Idky. I feel like since I been with him I've lost lots of weight and lost alot of self esteem, and my health is really down now, now I feel like if he leaves its over for me.
Pennie Thompson -I'm of the same sentiment,except what we're in is called Co-Dependency...another sad condition.
Narcissist is an energy vampire. Definetly always looking for new supply. Love this video.
Just went through this again.
I'm getting smarter about it.
Hey Kevin! I know this video was from a while ago, but I wanted to thank you so much for this message, which once again confirms that I did the right thing to have ended that toxic relationship. You said my exact words when I discarded.
"I'm done." Those were my very words, and I meant what I said after 12 years of forgiving and hoping for change. All for nothing.
I thank The Almighty for freeing me from the abuse and from the sadness. I am almost 8 months free and I am past the pain, but dealing with the regret that I hung in there for so long.
Thanks for reminding me:
I TRULY DISCARDED
I WAS/AM TRULY DONE
I AM FREE! 💝
👑💯🙌❤️
This is a brilliant analogy. The therapists say the narc discards you which they do...But it is up to you to make the final discard with the trash.
Thanks for this explanation.
I discarded that creature after the push and pull back and forth, the pain was worse than labor pains I never felt that kinda of pain ever. I said if I stay I'll be hurting and if I go I will be hurting because I fell in love with the fake illusion in the end he was caught off guard with a Sheriff serving him with a restraining order it's been a year since I left that train wreck of a facade!
+Shar Hughes good for you thank you for
Shar Hughes . Congratluations. Individuals with NPD or toxic individuals will continue to grow because no one is holding them responsible. I really would love to see how many folks on these sites have the same abuser.. Folks should at least identify the Narc using an initial, F or M, and state.. Disgarding is mental ( agreed.) But, what happens to the next individual? They're not being addressed and therefore, society is assisting with the increase of poison being distributed in the community..
Sasha odette Yes there ought to be a database of narcs!!! I would bet that there are many overlaps of people who dealt with the same narc!
Yesssss for the restraining order!!! Very proud of you.
Hello
i set boundaries with a narcissist about coming over to my house unnanounced and parking illegally in front of my house he disregarded my request multiple times, then he came over to my house when i wasn't home snooping around in my backyard. Then he showed up late in the evening unannounced. i told him to leave and he threw a tantrum "I'm never coming over again" I said "good". then i texted him a picture of my no tresspassing sign. the next day he called me swearing and hung up. "I texted him blocking your number permanently" It felt so good to finally be free of him. years of pain and problems. and now i can heal and not worry that this dude considers me a place he can just show up anytime when he needs something. absolutely no regard for me, my requests or boundaries. I'm hoping this is the final discard.
+Ted Myrrh you're absolutely right, they have no regard or respect for you. This is why the decision to discard is yours. And it's for your own protection
Record and report everything. Get a restraining order.
Ted Myrrh I wouldn’t suggest trying to beat them at their own egoic game. Just get boring and they’ll go away and leave you alone. If you need the drama of the aftermath there’s something you need to deal with. I wish I had done it a lot smarter.
update......the narcissist showed up at my church (which he doesn't attend) probably part of "the smear campaign"...
Ted ... this is typical. Mine plays the good Christian - he was seeking enlightenment and became a reborn and had a new baptism after his girlfriend died - whom he probably killed with his abuse. So yeah.... they do this kind of shit to appear like the "good" man... they go to church, join a religion, help in the community and volunteer. Not because they have a conscience but to maintain their false self.
You have helped me so much! I've been in a Christian marriage of 34 years but am now getting out of it. I do understand and it has set me free.
👑💯
Lisa wines,Is he a narc?
Can't wait till I overcome, heal and move forward. To be again, Full of life, self-love, & the will or motivation too be in your head-space.
Thank you Kevin. Words can't express how welcoming and on point your knowledge is... Its crazy how you break them down to the T.... I love you brother thank you!! Please never stop sharing the world needs to be aware. Bless u!
Great video!! I agree with everything!! I’m staying strong after being discarded. 💪🏼😍 I am worth it.
NO PRISI -- YOU DO THE DISCARDING... you are NOT discarded! You go NO CONTACT and discard the toxic relationship! Listen to this video again!
☝💓
it's important to remember
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
OMFG, I never thought to flip the narrative on discarding, such as you did. This has been the single most helpful comment in all the videos I’ve seen on NPD and being discarded. Thanks so much. You rock!
I met a Narc about 4 months ago, already had the love bomb, and the other stuff now we are at the Discard, him responding to my text with "ok", "great", etc... He is mad because I told him that I'm on to his mental disorder lol now we are at the Discard! well i'm so over it, I'm too strong for him and I agree 100% with this video. These people are weird as hell, they move way too quickly and if you really look back the warning signs were right in front of you day 1! I think it's interesting that these people are so obvious and weak! I now just want to pick on him but he aint that interesting enough to waste any more of my time. sad that he has to lie his way through life and biggest joke is I always call him out so I know he had to throw me in the trash!!! I'm too woke for him lol
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later...
Woke
💀💀 at....... "I'm to woke for him..lol.."
Before I knew what a narcissist was I was super disturbed by the false accusations he kept making at me and asked if he had a diagnosis he hadn’t disclosed… then came sleep deprivation waking me up to interrogate me over more false accusations before the discard shortly thereafter
This has provided me with that light bulb moment that I’d been looking for after months of research. I was so focussed on discard I hadn’t even looked at ‘regard’ and you are so right there actually was none, not in 28 years! I feel free to move forwards now knowing that it wasn’t discard it was just staying the same - no regard equals no discard. I chose to walk away for me and I’m so grateful to have discovered this today - Thank you 🙏🏻
The worst thing you can do to a narcissist is to disengage.
Will you just marry me so I wont have to go thru this madness anymore ? 😚
Yes, Kevin ! I get you. With a narcissist, theres NO such thing as a "discard". The discard really is just a way of threatening you into submission.
Its really just that.
The stonewalling/silent treatment that follows is nothing but a wait-it-out game.
Theyll be back before you can say narcissist.
Some Narcissists come back within a few weeks, months and some hoover even after YEARS with excuses like " youre the only one I ever thought abt all these years ".
So WE'RE the ones doing the discarding cause WE decide its FINAL, GAME OVER! They KEEP coming BACK AGAIN and AGAIN.
The discard really doesnt mean its over for these people. In fact, Id say its only the beginning !
Theyre only getting warmed up folks.
Its a 7 course meal and we're only at the starters.
Take whatever you have and get OUT.
I was discarded. I struggled to see it for what it is at first but its been 2 months and Ive made considerable progress and I feel so much happier.
There are some days that Im down when I think abt what happened but its slowly fading away to the back of my head.
Thank you, Kevin.
video, great input !
Ive learned so much.
of course i will
I know right lol. I just started watching this guy and I thought why can't I meet a guy like this? I'm scared that the next one I meet will be a narcissist. I will know the red flags but still it's scary to think that there are people out there who want to just take take take and destroy us 😢💔
Amen!
I wish I could be as strong, everyone says I'm one of the strongest women they know, why do I feel so weak
@@melissajones2377 The fact that you're saying this shows how much better you are than most people. Jesus said that the MEEK shall inherit the earth... Not the egotistic!
I realized after 3 years I was wrapped up with a narcissist. I actually left Pennsylvania and moved to Wisconsin to disconnect. I’m still struggling. I focus on only on myself to find happiness again
+Cheryl Pernot it is difficult. Thank you for watching.
Everything's gonna be ok by the grace of God ....i want you to know one thing you're enough , whole ,
Are you ok?
Cheryl pernot,I hope you find happiness soon ok🤙
Focus on God, grow in his Word to know true peace and tranquility.
Virtual love and hugs🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
I discarded my narc after 44+ year marriage. Yes, 44+ years! It took 8 months after filing for divorce for me to escape due to his extreme financial abuse. Now I am independent, happy & building true friendships. He suffered such a narc injury. He became even more abusive when I did not back down & followed through with my exit strategy that he is now in ruins, physically, mentally & financially to the point that he is now in a sexual relationship with my much younger sister. SICK! I'm certainly not enjoying his state of mind, however I refuse to break NO contact.
Cindy Roper 22 years for me.
Congratulations
t a. Thank you!
Stay strong! What a relief it must be to get away from that sickening mess! Keep moving forward!🤗
You go girl. I did exactly the same as you did. Keep going 🙏🏻
Your videos have changed my life. You are a blessing from God. Thank you so much! 💓✝️🙌
Thank you so much for this video. After my divorce 4 years ago being married for 21 years, I had great GUILT feelings for discarding an abusive relationship even to the point of thinking that I had narcissist characteristics, because I stepped out of the abusive relationship and marriage. After listening to your message on this video I can truly say I've put it in perspective now, not beating myself up for being the one discarding the situation and person I was married to.
Omg your so right !! 40yrs old I’m awake. Being a feeler that hurts badly! How can anyone treat someone so badly? That’s evil
Survivor OfMany hopefully your extended family will have little to no contact with you. Remain nc and don’t answer the door even if they see your car outside, just seen you walk in the house, or at your job.
Dynasty Of 3 Thank You! Trust me they aren’t showing up. They moved states & I didn’t know. Never called to tell me my bro passed from an od end of Jan. I know The weight my mom put on his shoulders re me. I didn’t know he was that bad. It’s just so fd up! I wanted better for our ds. She taught me what NOT to do as a mom. I’m grateful for that.
Dynasty Of 3 No extended fam .. we don’t have any family in this huge state. I rarely feel super sad for me.. it’s our only ds I feel for.
We moved when he was 4. I noticed my mom egging him on around 5yo. I lost my only bro to an accidental od end of Jan. I knew of his habit a yr before. You can’t make this crap up! My bro was the only one who stayed to live at home w his wife. My parents packed up & headed to Fla when we left home in 2011.
I quit drinking the kool aide when our ds was 5. So about 8yr ago. Never even heard from my parents about my own bro. That’s messed up right? If our son went NC I’d be banging his door down. Idk
It’s all so surreal. I mourn who I thought they were in my mind more. No record on loop for our ds. I left off where they stopped! Thank you!
Survivor OfMany it is really messed up that your parents didn’t even notify you of your brother and you are right that if my kids went missing for a hour I would be in panic even if they were old. Sometimes being away from the extended family is best. My sister just hovered me the other day after ghosting for a year. Didn’t even stop to say hello but just crept down the street. My ex did this the previous week but he didn’t come to my house but just turned around at a few houses down. The reach out of his hovering was limited to Gmail and I just learn how to block him from it completely. When he would talk to our kids it would be to play carry on at his funeral. Very toxic and negative. He has a family with his cousin, 2 kids that his narc family would always joke about to p me off. Then lie like it was false. I can’t have my kids around that environment, if you are breeding with your cousins then I know that your own kids are not off limits. So believe me, I understand how disturbing a narcissist and their family can be. Hopefully our days will get better sooner than later.
Survivor of many, same here. I just turned 41 and went no contact with my mom and sister 7 months ago... My Dad filed divorce just recently too. No contact is the only way.. I couldn't understand why my mom and sister can be so calculated and just mean. But 41 years later it's true. We just can't see it because you and I wouldn't ever treat someone like they have us.
Thanks, for clarifying the "narcissist's discard" myth. You make it clear that we are the ones in control of such a powerful act which puts us in ultimate control of the situation.
Dealing with a narc is too draining, almost debilitating... after many years of abuse I couldn't take it anymore.
Since I discarded my narcissistic husband, I've been feeling ENERGIZED! I'm 61 but I feel as young as I look!
Your toddler is so adorable! I laughed when you told him "No-no, you gotta be professional here."
+Master Artist thank you so much for watching and yes being with a narcissist is draining. Congratulations on being out of the abusive relationship.
I discarded my narc family 2 yrs ago and holding strong!! I discarded a long time friend 6 mos ago because he took sides with them against me! One shows up about every 2 mos, I won't answer my door, I'm totally done with all of them period!!
Lori Ackerman your story sounds a lot like mines
Hi Lori Ackerman ...my name is MELISSA AND CONGRATULATIONS 🎈🍾🎉 ON discarding ALLLLLLLL OF THEM. That’s amazing ..!!!
Head up girl . Great job. I’m not there quite yet but I will be. I KNOW IT..thanks for sharing
Bless you! Do you feel the energy you got from finally dropping them?
It took a long time to learn: if someone I didn't invite is at my door, they want something that will be good for them, and bad for me. Done. Not available.
Lori Ackerman my best friend and in law of 30+ years turned against me on my son’s wedding day last year. No reason ever given. She then bombarded me with hateful, vile comments about my character and convinced ALL of my husbands family to ignore us. She didn’t even tell my husband their mum suddenly died whilst visiting her. I think of her every day, wondering what I did or didn’t do to cause this. I don’t understand how these people I’ve spent most of my life with can turn their backs on us. I honestly hate their actions but the hurt at being rejected is so painful. I’ve had no contact with any of them, but wish someone would just explain why this happened.
This is one of the best and most helpful videos I have seen! Thank you so much! You have made me feel so much better about the “discard” and I feel empowered for finally moving on. Thank you again for these videos!!!! 🙏
Cindy Strong,You look stunning 🌹🌷🌹,hope you are not with a narc 😈!!
Excellent. Thank you for this excellent talk. Very empowering and helpful.
This is so relevant for me, thank you for your work man. Seriously
+iTradeCrypto thank you so much I'm glad that this video has found you at the right time
The Royalp
Kevin Svenson this is true good work
Advice needed- what if you have children?
Something I’ve learned is that NARCISSISTS ALWAYS HAVE TO FEEL IN CONTROL WHEN THE RELATIONSHIP ENDS! My experience: the lovebomb stage was over and I was getting fed up of how negative and contemptuous my narc boyfriend was being towards everyone. He was also putting a lot of pressure on me, telling me how to do my makeup and what clothes to wear. I told him I didn’t see a point in continuing the relationship. He goes silent for a few minutes. Then VERY QUICKLY, he turns around and says we’ll have to call it at that then. Trying to reframe the situation and make it look like HE was calling the shots. He became very cold and said a lot of very cruel things like it never meant anything to him anyway, I was just a notch in his bedpost etc. He basically needed to make it seem like the breakup was HIS idea.
I was raised in an extremely narcissistic family, so I ended up marrying a narcissistic man. Stayed in the marriage for 14 years, left the marriage; but still not realizing that I was being a victim of narcissistic people. After that I met a young man who portrayed himself like a better option but ended up being even more narcissistic. Finally I realized that it takes time to heal from that type of treatment from people like this. When youre vulnerable you end up getting involved in similar relationships. I think that is very important to recover first and regain self empowerment.
Sounds like my story
I am 68 years old and only recently realizing the full extent of how many narcissists have been in my life and the damage it has caused. The most difficult to accept as truth is my daughter, the only living child I have left. Denial is real. Thank you for your channel. I think you are helping a lot of people.
Omg thank you for this new meaning to the discard! Thank you so much!
So needed to hear this. I wrote down all the feelings he made me feel, then ripped it up and threw it away so that I feel I have consciously dumped all the toxic waste and am no longer carrying that negativity he brought into my life with me any longer.
💯🙌
What a good idea. Going to do the same myself.
Thank you for sharing! 20 plus years living through what I finally realize was a one way road. I’m done and looking forward to the next chapters of life😊
It took me awhile but I finally did the discard and I feel lighter and better than I have in years.
+myrasmama congratulations and thank you so much for watching.
Best breakdown I've come across. They're not really discarding you because they never really regarded you to begin with.
Thank you so much for your page. It's really helping me through my healing from a 2 year narcissistic and abusive relationship after my ex ghosted me about 1 month ago. I have literally been crying everyday for the last month, but like you said, I am purging. You are speaking my truth and helping me to reclaim my power.
Great way to look at it. Married to the narc over 18 years. He announced on our daughter's 17th birthday that he had someone else but he was not leaving. Oh no. He would just stay at her place on weekends because that was more convenient for him! Can't imagine what he told her! No contact for 12 months now except through lawyers. Some say I should bury the hatchet for the kids, now 18 & 16. His family has cut them off almost completely. The new woman has kids the same age and it seems they have just been replaced. Really weird.
they easily replace. shocking really.
@@stevenc8054 ok narc
I'm sorry...its sickening.....just remember they r broken & probably possessedd by evil............in his eyes........u saw it
So sorry for what u and your children are going through! May God comfort ur family and surround u with his everlasting love!
It’s not weird. Most narcissists begin to ignore their own children from their first marriage, in favor of the new wifey’s children. Even if they lived with the biological children for over a decade. Kids are left heartbroken. It’s the oldest story in the book.
Loving how you reveal to us that we do hold the power. Empowerment heals. Thank you ♡♡♡♡
Yessss
I binged on your videos all weekend after discarding a narc. I realized that in most of your videos, halfway through you say "now stay with me on this" and that's when the aha moment comes. You have a gift in that you make your points so clearly and speak in such a concise manner. Every word has meaning. And I love that your situation is not about a love interest, it's about family which helps me apply your concepts to everyone in my life, not just the men I fall for. My mother is your mother lol...I am attracted to depressed, alcoholic souls just like my mom; I want so bad to be the one to help them after years of consoling my mom and her sadness. I was pretty confused before I figured that out after one of your videos. I am going to sign up for your Online Course, can't wait to dig in. Thanks so much Kevin!
I just got the revelation this morning. It is true I have to discard all that is in me all the hate, anger , resentment, confusion, mental anguish, desperation, feeling worthlessness, feeling devalue, cheated, even feeling devalue, even feeling like garbage. Now I know I disengage. From evil. I thought in my mind he discarded me. But thank God again for the truth. I am being set free. I am crying again. This is bringing heeling over my mind. I was thinking he rejected me. But it is not true. I rejected the lies and deception . that is why he can't stay around me. Praise God.
Powerful video! PURGE THE TOXICITY.
too difficult or too easy; they will always discard you after
And if they marry you, they’ll carry on with being their horrible, infidel selves now that they have a license to do their antics whilst the society thinks they’re a normal citizen of the society.
I clicked on this on accident no joke and I cant stop crying it hit home in so many ways. I have become anxious depressed and sucidal due to this relationship idk how to just leave I am tired exhausted I need the strength to leave. Pray for me
This was so spot on. I could relate to everything you were saying down to a T. Absolutely incredible. As soon as I was unable to provide for him he found a way to leave me. Here I foolishly thought and hoped he would step up to the plate and finally lead in responsibility and I would see how much he wanted me. My romantic heart still wanted to believe in the best of him. But like you said, they are only doing what they've ever done. And that's to float along and ride on the coat tails of others to get whatever it is they want. So as sad as I've been to accept my new reality, which is a life without him, I need to consider myself blessed that the toxicity and drama are no longer a part of my day to day life. Now comes the work of purging the guck that remains in my head, body and heart.
+Tara Kathleen you are blessed to be out of the toxicity of that relationship. Thank you so much for watching I appreciate you
The Royal We I appreciate you as well. Even though we have never met I wanted you to know you've helped me through some difficult times by sharing your wisdom and experience. Thank you. And as sad as it is to know there are so many that have experienced similar abuse by these Narcassistic people in our lives, it's also healing to have someone like you helping so many of us and to know we aren't alone. 💜
My narc has the illusion of having the perfect relationship. But has yet discovered that you have to both work for it. He has gone out in the streets to tarnish my name. And then has been telling me that nobody else will want me.
The final no contact ended with a restraining order. The verbal abuse turned into physical. Great message. Thank you!! 🙏
Mine ended with a harrassment t charge and I loved him . He wouldn’t stop because I had left because my daughter was suicidal . I had to get away and save her . He tried to get
Me to come back by ruining my career and drugging me and I caught it but he still said he was reporting it to the board of nursing I panicked for 3 months worried about hair follicle test . He just starting hating me I didn’t get it he turned off her phone when I told him she attempted suicide and I was on way home to her and she wasn’t answering and then he turned off the lights . We did have a wonderful relationship at one time like a love story and he changed
I am 4 years removed and healed from the narcissist but this video helped me understand who and what I was involved with. Just WOW! I never knew... We do have a child together. It keeps me in prayer. Thanks so much for this.
What a revelation about the reality of the final discard. Thank you for empowering me to see the truth
Thank you for providing a more positive and hopeful take on explaining how this type of persons abuse effects people and how a person could combat that! So many people who speak about narcissist I feel, give them too much power. You are empowering people!
I needed to hear this! Thank you! My ex is a narcissist. Thank you for helping me see the light at the end of this emotional & mental abuse I have endured. You're a God send to each one of us going through this difficult time. It's good to see support on you tube for people like me that need help in understanding narcissist's.
Brilliant insight....i did inner child trauma on my worth...ran for my life to treatment...WOWED Kevin🙏 grief stage now...loss of self
is intense loss...im coping...going in deep waters...but SAVED self...
I NEEDED to watch this SO BAD right at this moment in my life. I took notes and will remind myself daily of the Conscious level exercise if Discarding my ex with all my power. Thank you !!
I luv this video THANKYOU
I WILL NEVER DUMPSTER DIVE AGAIN!!
2 funny......loved ur comment.......it out a huge smile on my face n made me laugh....thanks
Yess same here hahaha
That was funny 🙂thank you for making me smile
This video is poetry. Thank you for helping me heal from my recent break up with a narcissist.
I get it now,!! I had to discard, I could NOT take one more lie or broken promise, cant do this toxic relationship anymore !! thank you
I'm listening from greece....I've been depressing all these traumas and everything came out... to the point thinking I was the crazy one😢and now I'm to the level "I'm done"...from both sides of my family toxic 😕 I already asked help...I reached the last stage that I need.... that hand up that you said in another video...that it's ok to let them go and move on....I'm blessed though I have my husband and my friends to keep me in sanity...your videos really helped me today, and I believe so many people find courage from you....thank you for sharing these priceless advises....God bless you 🙌🙏🤍
I just came across your videos today. They have given me such a fresh perspective. Ive been suffering for months through the silent treatment and feeling discarded. The psychological mind games have been very painful and watching him act as though i never existed.
I've been discarded about 4 months ago by my ex GF and ran into her 2 months ago and we both acted very indifferent. We've been together ten years and we broke up several times. I always went back to her only days or weeks. But not this time. I know that if I get back, this will be a self destroying action. I hope I will never give in and try to get her back. She happens to live in the same neighborhood, and I am even thinking about moving not to see her again. Loneliness is very hard and all, but the abuse I got from her was so frustrating... Thanks for your video man !!!
+Mehdi Harrizi I'm all for the idea of moving. It's a great way for New Beginning
A good woman will go 2 the ends of the earth to bring u joy dude.....move.....i dare u........a life awaits u. ........run from the beast
I am on board with ‘no contact’! We have children, but I totally get this concept and it is working well despite him using children as tools of manipulation. Now teaching children how to protect themselves w/o resentment because they see/know truth too.
Kay Nelson
👍🏻
How do you do it with kids? That's my big question
Tamara Garrett : I have two adult boys from previous relationship. I have two girls with me from this toxic marriage; 9yrs & 4yrs. The 9yr old sees it and gets it; 4yr old is seeing it but still is manipulated despite she has said she doesn’t like it. As mom right now, I manage everyday life stuff, my therapy, kids therapy, CPA investing, and his supervised visits w/ girls, oh yeah...court dates too! It is busy, hard, and expensive....I know this moment is temporary and must go through in order to be free. It is worth it! I can and I will !!! I am patient w/ girls, glad to have them, show them love, ensure them they are safe ...children know truth.
The most important thing that I do daily: Instead of looking at what he is doing and saying; I choose to focus on my truth. What am I doing and saying. I decided to write my own narrative. He does not define who I am. I do; by my choices. I choose forgiveness & freedom through Jesus! Amen!
Tamara Garrett : There is an app called Family Wizard that I will be allowed to use under court order and the attorneys can monitor it and use it if necessary in court. It will track kids schedules and document all communication between ex and myself; therefore, communication is strictly about kids and no contact with me personally...like a business transaction.
Yes, the victim always controls the final discard. I finally did this to my ex narcissist after several breakups initiated by him. And it is final, also I will never give that thing one ounce of supply no matter how much meanness or hoovering ect. It has now moved on to another victim.
+Connie Howard this is the beginning of taking our power back
All he did was hurt me, but now I have to get therapy after all the false hope. He said the L-Word a million times, but discarded me for the third time. Evil, is all that he is. I gave him time, money, and energy with nothing to show for. It's almost a new year, and I need a change of scenery. Keep me in your prayers!
Thank u for this! I’m working through this but I keep remembering ways he deceived me...I swing from so angry to peace ☮️
We were in love with a lie. I have spent 17 years with a monster who pretended to be a sweet little lamb. I gave my best love everything I had, and everything I got back was rotten, looking back the verbal emotional and physical abuse, was unbearable. Thank you for your video as I am about to go through my final discard. He is leaving me with bare cupboards no gas, etc etc. This is going to be so extremely hard on me but with God's help I am going to take this final step, to my freedom.
How are you now? Are you free now? I Hope you are good❤
Spot on! I went through this recently with a Borderline. When I started recognizing the pattern of being the best friend in the world to being the enemy the next minute.....after it happened 3 times with the 3 day silent treatment in between each devaluing phase...I was done!!! I'm not going to have anymore one sided relationships where I'm always expected to be there for a person who is never there for me.
I've been feeling very down and obsessed over discard so I'm glad I found and listened to this again. Thx Kevin!
+tulum0617 you're welcome and thank you for watching
The straight goods Kevin. Thanks man. Day 10 no contact. I feel you man. Thanks again.
Silent Figure stay strong. Narcs are disturbing creatures.
Day 14 NC I finally talked to you and I appreciate your time. Thank you for listening I appreciate it. Conversation With A Narcissist: 12 things to Look Out For Joanna Kujath. This is what I delt with for 22 years.
Thanks so much.
Sorry for confusion this message is for Kevin.
Day 22 done.
Ted Berry day 129 of NC ! Some days are better then others! I truly do believe this is my final discard
Thank you for the congratulations! It is about time. My head's been into sand for way too long
thank you so much , your videos are helping me through getting over the narcissist. I’ve watched multiple videos on TH-cam but yours speak the most to me. I’ve been binge watching for two hours
Same here. I have listened to many others who were very informative and helpful but this man is blowing me away!!!!! I have only listened to 3 of his videos but I believe he is going to change my life!