Therapist reacts to a 45 by Shinedown
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ม.ค. 2025
- Therapist analyzes the lyrics to 45 by Shinedown to discuss the value of shifting your anger away from what happened and toward the negative things that anger or situation makes you want to do. Shifting your anger toward something that can actually change is a more powerful action instead of focusing the anger on the past which can create a sense of hopelessness.
#shinedown
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“A lot of us died a long time ago no one could tell because there wasn’t any blood” I feel this quote
where did you find this. i agree with you, so so much
Jesus fuck
Even if the blood was there people are so stuck on them selves they wouldn’t see it anyway .. even if walking thro it
@@jimhaga9553 its the lyrics of the song
@@nero756this is def not the lyrics to this song. Like what?
I would recommend going down the shinedown rabbit hole. How they started and who Brent was. And how he came out of this and still creates real music today for the winning team. He's a hero
And in case it gets missed, which is easy to overlook, is be sure and take the branch of Shinedown that is Smith and Myers. Brent's story is such a perfect and epic journey for any therapist to see and potentially use to show that here is someone who not only hit bottom, but stayed there and then not only climbed thier way out but decided to climb the mountain that was next to the hole. Especially how today his is so open and often discusses his continuing mental health struggles. She could probably even land an interview or long format conversation. He's a living example of everything is possible.
His story is absolutely amazing! They’ve been talking about mental health in their songs their entire career. Jump down the rabbit hole and you won’t be sorry you did. He and Zach were recently on Beet Kreicher’s podcast Bertcast and they talk about it.
Agree
I went through hell on the wards in the nursing home in 2020. The only thing that really helped me heal was seeing them live in baton rouge. That did more than I could ask for, I was alive and not gone but I did try.
Crow and the butterfly
There's a version of this song where at the very end, he whispers "but I'm still alive" and it radically changes the song and makes it all so beautiful and encouraging.
i wanna find that version, id also recommend the acoustic version
@@HadesRising99 th-cam.com/video/mkBCosrxF5Q/w-d-xo.htmlsi=SRGyOVw_UjmPs1OB
@@HadesRising99 Its the acoustic version from Kansas City.
th-cam.com/video/mkBCosrxF5Q/w-d-xo.html
thats so frikkin cool!!
The fact that he wrote the song on the wallpaper of his hotel room and how this song literally saved him just adds a whole extra level to it.
"what a shame" will probably give you chills and tears
I was looking for this one
Played it at my twin brothers funeral. Kentucky Deluxe and Marlboro Reds. Too many commonalities in the song. The whole album was the shit. Call Me gets at Me, too
And Save Me
Agree it totally talks about my late brother everyone judged him.
This entire era of music was intense, there just seemed to be so much sadness, sorrow, and hopelessness. It fit really well with a whole generation of kids who felt like they'll truly never have a place in the world, and no one knew what their future was going to look like, not to mention, most kids who listened to this style of music were the "weird" kids so your only escape was music since school and often home weren't safe spaces. This is what made bands like Slipknot, Linkin Park, Shinedown, Hoobastank, Incubus, Korn, Tool, Evanescence, etc... so popular, they all seemed to encapsulate that loneliness and fear we were all feeling at such a young age. This is the reason why my musical tastes haven't really modernized because there's really nothing modern that I feel really resonates with me much like the metal and rock from the early 2000's.
I feel this, I do get into newer music and other music here and there. But every time, I always come back to the early 2000s.
You really hit the nail on the head with this comment. Felt lost then, still feel lost now but it feels somewhat like a blessing to have had these bands and this music to lean on, then and now.
You forgot A Perfect Circle, Nine Inch Nails, Stone Sour….. ✊ I miss those days
seether
I agree. I grew up in the 1990s and early 2000s and used music as my therapy. I just thank God our generation didn't grow up with social media. I couldn't image how much harder that would have been.
This is probably Shinedowns saddest song. But it is also a banger. Great analysis.
What a shame is a little worse.
"45"
"What a shame"
"Save me"
"Crow and the Butterfly"
"Call me"
And of course "Second Chance"
These are the songs that have always gotten to me.
She like 35. Definitely heard this song 1500 times. Trash song.
@@josephinearchar8489 And Bully and misfits are two others IMO.
Shinedown is so good, and has gotten me through everything from depression, divorce, military deployment. They have become a part of my life since Leave A Whisper and has never stopped. I think you will have a lot of options going down the Shinedown rabbit hole, and it’s a great one.
There is a live version of this song, I believe from Kansas City. Brent Smith explains the origin of this song. It's a message that many need to hear.
Yep. From the Somewhere in the Stratosphere double live release
Kansas City 2003 I believe. Has a different ending as well.
Problably my favorite version of it. Just love that entire show! His voice really shines when it's acoustic.
Came to say that!
I was hoping someone brought this up! Really really moving when and how he explained the song. Complete silence in the audience. This video here with Taylor brought me to tears
then brent smith got sober and now makes the most uplifting songs... definetly one of my favorite bands
Thank you
It's amazing how this band evolved and changed over the years this band really can make you feel something, absolutely incredible live as well
As someone who suffers from depression, Shinedown is my go-to to get my head right. These songs help take away the pain of dealing with the struggles of life and after a failed attempt with a 357 revolver when I was 15 I have vowed to never do it again and Shinedown helps with that
🫂🖤
I’m glad you’re still with us brother! ❤️
@brett3429 glad to be here. I have 3 beautiful daughters that help also. Them and my wife help keep the demons at bay
If this is first reaction to shinedown welcome to the worm hole as you will not stop listening to them
💯!
That song will never NOT get me in the heart 😢❤
It was always the breath at the end that got me. Cause I’ve been there. That breath on the other side of deciding not to leave. That always put a pit in my gut..
More shinedown! Also Brent (the lead singer) shared one of your videos on the band Facebook a week or so ago!
That's how I heard about this channel/foundation and what they're doing. I'm all about it! I requested more Shinedown since their platform IS mental health
He is such a mental health warrior 🖤🫡
My heart goes out to you. And anyone feeling sorrow , grief , hopeless… my heart aches for everyone
As a veteran of a couple of tours in Iraq… I couldn’t have said it better. Thank you for this.
Everyone is free to interpret the song how they want to, through their own filters. I find it therapeutic and heartening.
I remember when this hit the radio waves. It had quite the impact. Beautiful and tragic.
Shinedown’s music, more often than not, will elicit an emotional response. Brent Smith does a masterful job of conveying the emotion of the song through his voice.
A friend told me awhile ago that anger,bitterness,and rage stem from being hurt. And if we identify what hurt us then we can deal with the hurt and move past it. That has actually brought so much healing to my life.
"45 is a metaphor for everything the world gives you and everything it will ultimately take away" -brent smith
Sorry for your loss, my condolences, as a former MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL, former "Suicide Survivor," and Hard Rock, Heavy Metal music lover, sounds like your friend loved the band and this song for a good reason, and had a plan for a long time
The acoustic version of this song is so powerful, would highly recommend giving it a listen!
The one from the live in Kansas City performance is the absolute best one to me.
This was the 1st song released by Shinedown and I heard it over 20 years ago. I'm now 51 and I've been a fan ever since I first heard this! And this video just gave me the same chills as it did 20 years ago! Thank you!
I've spent years on the edge, sometimes music like this is the only thing that gets me through it. It's the only way I'm heard. It's important.
Stay strong friend, you are not alone. I spent 20 years living on that edge, stumbling on the brink and asking myself why I don't give in to the darker impulses.
Music has been my therapist through it all. I throw my headphones on, crank the volume and push forward.
It gets better. Life ain't perfect but it does get better. Keep jamming out and pushing forward, you've got this.
Glad your still here friend...I was raised in an abusive up bringing as a child and it has damaged me into adulthood but God, music and my family has gotten me through most of my issues..
I was 16 when this song first came out. I won't ever forget hearing it on Rock 108 for the first time. It, along with Down With The Sickness by Disturbed, was responsible for me finding rock/metal music and getting into the genre. The lyrics spoke to me as I didn't have a great childhood at school. The song itself was powerful and I quickly became a Shinedown fan. It's one of the songs I'll still turn to when I start to feeling depressed or unable to see the brighter side.
Shinedown, Disturbed, Godsmack, A Perfect Circle, Metallica, Linkin Park, Three Days Grace, Killswitch Engage. They're all who I turned to in my mid-to-late teens to get me through some of my toughest days. And they're still who I turn to now in my mid-to-late 30s, twenty years later, to get me through tough days.
I think you're just me from the past. I'm that kid now. the ONLY band I don't hear on a regular basis there is killswitch engage.
I hope you keep rocking on. the bands are comprised of beautiful souls, who truly mean the best for anyone they're talking to.
although now I'm curious if you listened to SOAD-either way, I am happy to see people rocking out the feels. hope you are having a wonderful time in the music!
You forgot Tool, Korn, Nine Inch nails ✊
@@kristenharrison9279 you know, those are also amazing! I 100% agree with you they are amazing. slipknot I've recently been listening too as well! rock on my friend.
This song is hauntingly beautiful and it resonates so much with me and how i grew up, im getting better mentally but songs like these give me a place to vent and im grateful they exist
Ive seen them live twice and knowing how close we were to not having brent around to make his amazing music is insane. Brent and the rest of the band are all amazing people and i love that they have stuck by one another and have always used their platform to help and empower people especially those who are struggling or have struggled. Thank you shinedown for every song yall have blessed us with
I have been listening to them since the Jacksonville days. This song helped me through my dark times then and now. It's a blessing to see someone else's reaction to them. Congrats on finding a band that will have you in tears one minute and raging with joy the next.
Shinedown is amazing. Every freaking song they made is incredible in my book. Love the song, Second Chance. There's lots of meaning there!❤
I've had this video saved in my watch later playlist for so long. I was afraid to watch it but still needed to watch this. If anyone is struggling, keep going. You can make it out of the darkness. Much Love 💜
I seen Disturbed live this year and they preformed " reason to fight" it was incredible, anyone struggling just know people WILL miss you. Thank you for the video Ma'am.
This is why so many people love Shinedown. We feel the lyrics in our souls. They got me through some of my darkest moments.
Shinedown has a huge catalog to choose from.
An often overlooked song is Burning Bright (from the same album as 45).
More Shinedown, please
Burning Bright is my all time fav.
such a good song
And, Breath. It's such a good song!❤
One of my favorites!
Listen to atmosphere and atmosphere demo, very different but both are amazing
Ive lived these lyrics, and they helped in a time when i needed it without anyone speaking, forever much love for shinedown!!!
Sitting here crying watching this knowing I've fought through so many thoughts about ending it all, yet still wishing it all was over. The struggle continues but I'm so tired. I won't give up but some days I want to so bad
Keep fighting friend. The world is a better place with you in it. Even. when it is hard to believe.
I can tell you as a suicide survivor that chriskinds is correct. It is a better place with you here. Find someone, doesn't have to be a professional, you trust but will also tell you with no bs attached to talk to. Those feelings won't go away overnight unfortunately but they will pass I promise
From Lyss: @ionystherogue5627 Hey there friend,
First off, I just want to say thank you for being open with us here, we appreciate it and don’t take it for granted.. I believe that sharing how you feel, and what you have been through, can help others feel less alone. Once again, thank you so much.
You are not alone in this fight my friend. I have been there, crying on my bathroom floor, bedroom floor, in my car, just thinking about how much I wanted to die. It gets hard. Emotions build up, what we have been through can be too much at times. Some days I just ask myself why am I still here? I ask myself why I haven’t killed myself yet. I appreciate you for sharing what you have felt, as it has made me feel less alone… thank you.
I am so proud of you for staying, for fighting. You are so strong and brave. I hope you continue to stay.
Life is tiring, the world is tiring. I totally feel you, some days it’s just like that last thing happens and it is the last straw, it makes you think again like why am I still here. Please know you are not alone in how you feel, the thoughts you have had, or what you have been through. Many, including myself are on a similar page to you; I try to remind myself that there have been many in the place, or headspace I am in now, and they are now living proof that it gets better. In the moment it can be so daunting, and scary; it can feel like nothing will get better… in those times I try to remind myself of those where it did get better, where things changed, where things didn’t stay terrible. I think that can be of assistance to me in the moment, to help ground myself, bring myself back down to earth, to the current moment.
I am proud of you for not giving up.
I you have come so far, that is something to remember. You may be in a bad moment, but think of the other bad moments you have been in before this- and how you overcame them, how you stayed even though it was hard, even though you didn’t want to.
In the moment I know this will be hard to accept, as I have been there myself, trying to remind myself- things get better… it takes time and work, but it does get better.
You have come so far my friend, and that is something to remember, to praise yourself for. You are doing amazing. It is hard to see the light at the end of a tunnel, but my friend it is there. Please know that we are always here for you, to listen, or to be a shoulder to lean on. You can always post on the heart support forum, and we will be there for you.
Take it slow, take it easy.
Sending love,
Lys
🫂 I hope you are ok, we love you man 🖤
I feel this too. I got thrown from a car on 95 after my drunk ex lost control trying to punch me and spent a week in a coma and had other “catastrophic injuries” and somehow survived but was in pain obviously and prescribed pain meds for a few years before my doctor cut everyone off with a months worth of meds. Ended up getting them off the streets then graduated to heroin. I then lost my brother, best friend, cousin, uncle, ex, and countless others in quick succession to ODs.
I myself went into self destruction mode. Every time I used I hoped it’d be the last time. That it would just be the sweet release and euphoria that fades into nothingness. I’d get mad when I realized someone had Narcanned me. I ODed one time and seized then aspirated vomit into my lungs and had severe pneumonia but again somehow survived.
Had clots in my lungs almost completely blocking my arteries (pulmonary embolism) and the last time it was on top of pneumonia. I couldn’t breathe and needed to be intubated. My o2 sats dropped to unreadable while walking. Also had sepsis a separate time and needed to be intubated the ICU.
Oh and to add I just got hit by a car walking home a few days before Christmas. Fractured my knee, foot, and got a concussion.
Honestly, I don’t know why I’m still here. Every time I’ve tried I failed. Or someone stepped in. That’s the thing that hurts the most sometimes is that so many people close to me died after using fentanyl only a few times and somehow I kept going for years. It’s unfair to them that they didn’t get another chance like I keep seemingly getting. I’ve been sober 4 years and it hurts less than before but hasn’t gone away.
So believe me, I get it. If you’re into Shinedown and they help you I recommend Manchester Orchestra. Especially their song “The Silence”. It’s an absolute masterpiece and roller coaster of emotions whenever I listen. ❤
Lost my son to suicide by GSW to the Heart ❤. This song makes me break down every time I hear them sing it at a concert. Love Shinedown and the positivity that they provide. They’re amazing and I see them in concert every time they’re anywhere within 5 states of me!
Dear lord, I need a therapist like you! This video hit me right in the feels.
Keep up the search when you find "the one" it's so great and so much progress can really start to be made. Now with online therapy (if that's your thing) you can have even a bigger selection to find the right match.
Shinedown does so many songs about life. I really appreciate that. The Shinedown song that I listen to when I’m down is Burning Bright. One of many favorites from them.
This song came out about the time I went through my divorce, their music helped me get through that trauma.
I have been watching you react to some of my favorite songs. One of my favorite TH-cam videos is to watch reactions to these same songs. I’ve been waiting for so long for someone to feel and describe the deepest emotions of everything you react to. From Tool to Pear Jam to Shinedown, you nail it every time. Thank you so much!!
Please more Shinedown one of the best rock groups ever
When I heard this song for the first time, I said to myself and my friends…this band is gonna take off. Brent Smith’s voice is so made for iconic rock music. It’s one of the best voices in the genre.
Interesting that you heard "Anger" in the last section. I've always heard it as more "Screaming into the void"... a desperate attempt at catharsis when there is no apparent solution to the problems. But I wouldn't equivocate that with anger. When you get to that point, anger is in the rearview mirror, you're well beyond it. This is the point of desperation for relief in any form. To my ear, this is more a scream of reluctant resignation. I suppose there's no right or wrong interpretation of art, I just hear it a bit differently.
I mentioned to my therapist how much I enjoyed this series and they were pretty psyched to hear about this. I love your content. It made me donate to the fundraiser.
Had me all in my feels and shid damn, combinations of anger and regret and angry that there is regret and regret that there is anger
As someone who is currently struggling, your videos are a comfort
One of my favorite songs of all time.
Shinedown is my favorite band. They are phenomenal live couldn’t recommend seeing them more strongly they absolutely love what they do and the crowd they exude energy like no other.
Shinedown are awesome? You should really try "A Symptom Of Being Human" that hits in the feels but in a good way.
A Symptom of Being Human is an amazing song! I would love to see her reaction to it.
I love this song❤
That and "Daylight" are incredible songs from that album.
Brent Smith has stated that this song is not about suicide. “Staring down the barrel of a .45” is a metaphor for dealing with all the struggles that life throws at you.
This song is a cover he did not write this
@
They did do a cover of Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd. But this song was definitely written by Brent Smith. A quick search in Wikipedia will show you this. What I wrote above actually came from an interview with Brent himself.
8:29 you help me understand this song so much better. I have seen shinedown multiple times and every time before they play this song they say “remember this song is about hope” and I never got it, and I think you hit the nail on the head with this point about him fighting back.
Would love to see/hear you dissect more Tool music. "The Patient" off the Lateralus album, and "Descending" or "Invincible" off their Fear Inoculum album are all really great songs, and it would be really cool to get your take on the meanings of them. "Invincible" hit me pretty hard, as I had just retired from the fire service just before their latest album came out.
"beating tired bones, tripping through remember when"
I discovered them years later from when they started out but their music really touches my soul and helps me through so much when I am going through those emotional times.
Disturbed - inside the fire will for sure get you, love your insight on music
She did one on sound of silence
Just discovered this channel recently and I love what you are doing. I have struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts for most of my life, someone like you who is doing so much to help people is amazing. As for Shinedown, this band has pulled me back off the ledge more times than I can count. This song in particular has literally saved my life on many dark nights because I use it just like you suggested. I listen to 45 and I get angry at the thoughts and what they make me think of doing, and that is always the first step away from the ledge. Thank you again so much Taylor, you are truly amazing.
Been there multiple times and unfortunately never had the courage to pull it. But yeah Shinedown has a lot of songs like this that suicide victims and survivors can relate to.
It's not unfortunate. I'm familiar with where you've been. Even if you don't have anyone close to you, there are people out there that see and understand you. Continue not finding that courage.
@@warspyder7406 yeah everyone that I was close to is dead
My mental health journey is different because I have been told by professionals I'm a lost cause and I created a persona to escape my own reality
Do you feel like you're trapped in somebody else's life? And it's not yours and you don't belong there. You don't talk to your family and friends because they feel like strangers. That's about where I'm at.
@@jonphinney4065 beyond that I created a persona to escape from my own real self because nobody ever gaf about me
TY TY TY! This is one of my all time favorite songs and you broke it down so well and I actually understood all of it and came up with the conclusion before you got to it. I’m so happy I found this page and your reviews! This will be my new therapy for awhile. Feel like I should be paying yall.
In a concert Shawn explained that 45 did not reference a gun.It was a metafor of the world and everythings its gonna give you take away from you.
Who is Shawn?
Your videos are a highlight to my day. I struggle with severe depression and have had thoughts. Thank you for your positive outlook!
As a Shinedown fan I am feeling so bad for the therapist right now. Gee let's have a very empathetic caring person with a high EQ listen to the raging mind of someone with those thoughts and feelings. What can happen? Especially when she had a friend who succumbed to the darkness... What can go wrong? My sympathies.
Sorry for your loss. Thanks for dissecting this song in a real way. You are such a positive path.
“Everything’s Wrong” by All That Remains 🙏
Would listen to this tune when it first came out and years later still listening. No one does know or has a clue or cares. The problem is you can’t change some pain and illness. If I didn’t wake up tomorrow it wouldn’t really matter. Even to people I’ve loved and helped. You always have to be fine ❤ Thanks as always
Monsters by Shinedown is great. If you haven't heard it, you should give it a listen.
I have started watching your quids...You have a gift young lady.
There is over 120 suicides in the US every day, of those nearly 80% are male. With well over a million attempts every year. With women being more likely to attempt it and men being more likely to succeed “that is a strange phenomenon”. That being said I don’t have that bone in me and was fairly uncaring about it for years. After 40 years on this earth however I have pains that won’t go away and as such I have tried very hard to tell my kids that they should weigh every interaction they have carefully as it’s hard to tell just what other people are going through. Be kind, and don’t hold everything against people. You just could save a life.
I've just discovered your reaction videos, and this is everything I've needed. Thank you so much.
And to think this song was written in total awareness during a time when we didn’t help people who have these thoughts.
We still sadly don't
Medicate it away! Sad because you have no one to talk to here take drugs. Addicted to drugs from your traumatic path??!? Here take drugs to stop taking the drugs and other drugs to zombify your pain.
Side effects?!?!? More drugs for those!
Depressed because you can't afford to regularly see you pill pushing doc.....more drugs to numb you till you can!
Eat junk food, don't worry about working out or walking, don't waste your time on journaling or mindfulness meditation, take a pill!
Oh and sure Lithium will mess you up long term but hey you get a few extra zombie blaa years....right?!?
Luckily psycho therapy has come a long way. As long as you don't try to treat everything with a pill concoction.
This song was a really important one to me as a young man. Listening to it here took me back in time.
I would love to see your reaction to "Ghost" or "Family" by Badflower. :)
I’ve heard this song a million times. I’ve seen them live 3 times. Your initial reaction made this song brand new for new. And this is one of my favorite bands; hands down.
Hi hun can U look at the song Monster's by shinedown
I love the message you're trying to bring to this song. This song has been around for nearly 20 years and it still gets me riled up, it still drives up memories from high school driving around alone screaming this song in my car because I had no one that I felt could relate to what I was going through. Shinedown has helped so many millennials get through so much. We owe them. ❤️❤️
45 is not a gun in this song it's a metaphor for life
Bullshit. That is what the band says but LISTEN to the words, not just hear them. In fact this woman is agreeing with them "acceptance is a gas pedal for change"
@@Pur420 Please research what a metaphor is
Yeah your ignorance is amazing. He is talking about a gun not anything else.
@@anakin3197 think the man who wrote it, knows a lot more about the song then you do
@@StevenResnick It's both, I don't know why this argument is happening.
On the surface, the 45 is the gun that he is "staring down the barrel of." Pretty obvious. Once you look at the deeper meaning, the metaphor comes into play. It's both.
The sign of relief at the end of the song gets me every time. I work in mental health and am working toward my MSW to be an addiction counselor for people with severe mental illness and am so excited to find your channel. This is great!
What you said from 5:30 - 6:00 just broke me.. I needed to come across this video… thank you
I played this song more than I'd like to admit when I was younger in that song era but I'm still here, I had a heart attack 6weeks ago, I'm only 38 & it truly made me see just how precious life really is🙏🏻
This song has a special meaning to me. When my first wife left me, she had me convinced that I was a problem; that I was manipulative and unbearable. I truly made a plan and prepared to take my own life because I hated what I saw in the mirror and in her words. I wrote letters to those that I cared about, and it was the grace of God that changed my mind at the last minute. The next song I hear was this one. I never got angry about it, but I took it as divine intervention and, as such, whenever I start to have those thoughts again, I think back to this and find the strength to push through and survive.
This was very well worded. PTSD is awful and feels like being trapped in a cage you can’t escape that consumes every aspect of life. There’s a point where the pain becomes numb and the thoughts of a 45 no longer matter. I call it the dark. It’s past pain and it’s the most dangerous place to be.
I just lost one of my cousins to suicide couple weeks ago and I honestly forgot this song existed until now. Such a sad, emotional song but that's what makes Shinedown so great, their ability to make relatable music for everyone to hear.
There’s a lot of people that have been hurt, most don’t know how to deal with it, but are also too stubborn to authenticate their problems or pain. It’s not easy! I’m struggling with this issue with people that I love and have lost, just keep fighting!
Would love to see more Shinedown reactions. I know it must be hard for you given what you went through put would love to see more Shinedown reactions. Cut the Cord, A Symptom Of Being Human, Unity, some of my personal favorites, but so many to choose from.
My condolences to you and the family of your lost friend. I genuinely hope you've managed to find your peace.
Going through one of those nights, thank you for the commentary at the end.
This song is great because so many of us know that feeling all to well. It rips at that part of you and releases the pain.
The end of that one always gets me. He’s being so honest and open
I lost my little brother to suicide the day before thanksgiving this year, it’s been really hard to stay positive. Shinedown had been a major part of what’s keeping me going
So sorry to hear that, God bless you and your family.
From KyleGouldOfficial: @bryanhansen1957 Hi,
Lost can be alot especially a loved one like a Brother and how suicide can really change our lives when someone close go through something like this...
Opening up about this definitely is the best thing to do in the situation and how hard it could be losing someone just be there for each other through this. These types of situations can put in alot of train of thoughts and pull you through different ways of how i could of change it. It definitely not easy and you're not alone through something like even though the tough times. Im glad music like this helps you open up and connect to us here. Remember you're not alone through this and it not the end even when it may get hard and keep guiding towards that positivity you're searching for.
Take Care & Hold Fast.
From Nphagan88: @bryanhansen1957 First of all, I'm so deeply sorry for what you're going through but I'm glad you've come to HeartSupport. A loss near the holidays is so hard. You are not alone in that feeling. I lost a girlfriend to leukemia in December 2003 and the holidays are still a bittersweet time as a result. Your loss is still fresh and you will grieve in your own way and timeframe. Don't let anyone attempt to dictate either. Much love to you
From I-Am-Reclaimer: @bryanhansen1957 Hey Friend,
I'm terribly sorry to hear about your loss. But I'm really glad you found HeartSupport.
I'm sure this year's holidays have been really tough not only for you, but for your family. I've had both friends and extended family members who have done the same and it's just so confusing. Why did they do this? What was it that I could have done that could have stopped them from doing this? Could I have been a better friend? Could I have been a better family member? I wish I could say I love you one more time and maybe that would have stopped them. Maybe if I just gave them a call, or sent them a text saying how much I cared about them would have changed their mind.
There's so many things that are probably spinning around in your head almost as if little demons are convincing you that you're the problem and that your inaction caused this.
Man, It's tough to deal with but the thing that I learned through all the confusion and all the pain is the importance of just talking about it. Getting things off your chest with your family, your firends and even us here at HeartSupport. Talking through your pain reduces the burden in which you must carry and actually helps you to grieve to heal, to grow and to learn from this in the sense of being there for others.
Further, keeping this all inside can add up and lead to some sort of negative outcome...something I wish I would have known sooner as in my own life it caused me to cope in a destructive way. If it weren't for my family and friends and finally opening up to them and crying on their shoulders, I'm not sure where I'd be myself.
I'm glad that you found a song and found a band that keeps you going, but know that behind the music, there's an entire community waiting for you with open arms to let you know that you're not alone in your struggles. The road before you is hard, it's dark and it's going to be filled with random moments of pain and remembering memories of your little brother and that's when it's okay to reach out to us, to your family, and to your friends.
We're here for you and I know your family is there for you as well.
Stay strong, my Friend. We're in this together.
From crisbris: @bryanhansen1957 Hi,
Thank you for sharing your pain with us. I can't imagine what this Holiday season was like for you and your family, but I am glad that you had each other to comfort the massive black hole that was left behind by your little brother.
My ex's dad died suddenly a few days after New Year's Eve 2020. We were left with so many questions: If we'd insisted he go to the hospital when he complained about pain, would he have survived? If we knew how to do CPR properly, would it have given him a chance? If the ambulance didn't waste time on the road, would it have changed anything?
There's no answer to these questions, nor will there ever be. He died of natural causes but we were left to deal with a lot of feelings of "what if?", desperation and even guilt for not somehow preventing the unpreventable. I slowly learned there shouldn't be an answer. There is no answer big enough, satisfying enough to fill the hole they leave behind. There will always be another question behind it.
What there should be is compassion. You and your family carry this burden together. You are the only ones that know how heavy it is. I am so sorry that you have to know this pain. But it also means you are not alone, there are people who understand. It's so important to express how you're feeling to them and listen to their own pain. It won't heal it, nothing can. But it will make it lighter, even if by just a few atoms at first. Your brother's memory can bring you closer and that can give you the power to transform at least part of a devastating tragedy into love and hope.
Keep close the ones that love you and the ones that you love. We're here anytime, anyplace that you need us.
With love,
Cris
I never had a sister. You are now my TH-cam sister. I love what you are doing…it helps me. Thank you
To listen to these songs from the late 90's early 2000's now looking back A lot of us were depressed teenagers, but look at us now, out here living life. Music saved a lot of our souls...
This helped me! Thank you! I’ve definitely been feeling sorry about myself too much!!
I have been listening to this song since it came out almost 30 years ago, and never really paid attention to the story, but after watching your reaction I am going back down the Shinedown Playlists. They are all about mental health, but I never honestly dug deep into the song lyrics. Great reaction!!!
your the first person i have ever seen point out the end of this song, the last minute of this song is when i lost it after a attempt on my own life i was solid through this song until the end when i heard him scream sing "45" broke me in places i didn't know existed inside myself, im so glad someone else finally pointed it out
I love this song! Shinedown are such a fantastic group, all of their albums are fabulous!
One of my favorite song when I was younger. Nice to see you reacting to this!
I love Shinedown. This episode hit me. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder a decade ago. I've been dead for years inside just managing each day. Meds didn't help. I also found out my T levels are extremely low. Have sleep apnea and feel like a zombie at times. I have been screaming for years Wishing I were dead but I have a family and refuse to go out that way. I am not staring down the barrel of a 45 but having to face the fact that i will be living the rest of my life as a hallow shell of what I used to be.
From djstarion: @tylerwright8328 Hello!
I read this and there's definitely some wins here, including figuring out what's going on, because that can be SUCH a hard step for anyone.
Have you tried talking to your doctor about the T levels (I'm assuming testosterone?) and the sleep apnea. Low quality sleep coupled with low test can have a HUGE impact on your mental health, and I would actually go that route to try and get yourself out of that hallow-ness. Maintaining and improving physical things in your body can definitely help you mentally.
I remember Brent saying that staring down the barrel of a 45 was a way of looking and what the world is throwing at you, and how to overcome it. I know you can overcome it too. It's just about finding the right direction.
From Shan: @tylerwright8328 Hi Friend,
Thank you for sharing and opening up. I'm sorry to hear about how you have been feeling over the years. I know you have been going through a lot and I understand how drained and empty you must feel from it all and for how long it has persisted. I do want to take a moment to recognize and acknowledge your strength and resilience. You have kept pushing and are still pushing through it all, one day at a time. That alone is something to be proud of, because it is not easy and it takes a lot.
I think that though you have tried some methods, such as meds, that have not worked, there is still other resources out there that can be tapped into or tried that could hopefully provide even a bit of relief for how you have been feeling so that you don't have to continue feeling like a hollow shell. The thing with mental health is that everyone's experience is different which also means everyone's journey to mental wellness is different as also. Different resources, methods, and combinations of efforts work for different people. Of course, I'm not sure of everything that you have done or tried throughout the span of time since you were diagnosed, I just want to try and be even a little encouraging that there is still something out there can be of help to how you are feeling. It just might take a little extra time to find it.
Also, like @djstarion mentioned, physical health plays a part in how we feel mentally. And the things you mentioned such as low T levels and lack of sleep can really intensify feelings/symptoms of depression as well. So maybe some physical relief from these things can provide some mental relief as well.
No matter what, I hope you are able to find some relief soon and can slowly begin to reconnect with yourself and who you used to be. :white_heart:
From Micro: @tylerwright8328 Hang in there, friend. As a fellow buddy with clinical depression, I feel this with you. Just his constant numbness, emptiness and average mood that makes life seem so bland. It's hard to keep on finding reasons to push through when nothing seems exciting or tasteful anymore.
Sometimes though, we might be hit by a golden nugget of beauty. It may not be a permanent state of joy, also not something fundamentally transformative, but it shows us how much life *can* be beautiful at times and hide treasures of joy. To me personally, it helps a little bit to intentionally turn down the thoughts that make me reflect on life in general and loses me into deep philosophical questioning. I feel less depressed when I feel *alive*, and this spark is one I can find - sometimes - by using my five senses and setting an intention to a moment. Could it be the smile of someone I love, the warm sun on my skin during summer evenings, the breeze when I place my hand out of a window while driving, the perfume of my favorite coffee... it's all small, insignificant things on appearance. But sometimes it can turn out to reveal itself as a beautiful stillness in the midst of chaos, for the time that it lasts. :heart:
Ive heard this song countless times but never been in a place to feel it like this until now. I am feeling this big time. And how you are analysing it too...