The Real Reason Why We Divorced : Three Women's Private Conversation
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ต.ค. 2024
- Alena, Akeeba, and I took a walk around the beach and talked about our relationship, marriage, and divorce.
From First meet with Mazelee to now (Mazelee + Lily Petals Playlist)
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As your friend said, the problem wasn't the cleaning, it was that James disrespected you and allowed himself to speak very meanly to you
@@rasco27then change the way you talk lol. That’s not an excuse for you having low eq
❤ I’m so glad that you have a support system, Lily! 💪It’s healthy to talk it out with good smart intelligent people like Alena and her sister. They keep it real. And I didn’t know that the Mazelee’s have a housekeeper. I thought the kids did all of the chores lol
3 of my favorite ladies in one video!
Love that you covered this topic, and I absolutely agree. Once those core values shift or they break down, then everything else falls apart.
I want to feel joy every day. During my college years, I spent 5 of them in a toxic relationship. When it was good, it was great, but when it was bad, I found myself severely depressed and I was sick so often. I even lost who I was and had to find myself again.
Now, as I have been navigating single mom life abroad, I have found that I enjoy the time with just me and my kiddo more. Many times, I don't even want to go out with friends for very long because I miss my daughter too much. However, I know how important it is to get that time away from her. I haven't been trying to date since 2019 because dating in Korea is pretty whack, but who knows what will happen. Right now, I think it's best to become the best version of myself and go for my goals. ~
You all should do a podcast! I would love to listen.
Anyway, I hope to see you all in Korea soon. 😅
Awww.Thank you, Ren! I would love to meet you and your little Lily!
I love the 3 of you together. Alaina and Akeeba are such incredible, strong women 🤍🤍
My heart aches thinking about how this misogynistic abuse is rampant throughout so many cultures. You guys talking about the struggles and supporting each other, it’s beautiful in a women-in-solidarity way. But it’s grim how easily you all fully understand it 💔
Thank you ladies, these are real expressions of truth that a woman feels. I felt relief to hear this. The expectation of a wife, responsibilities are overwhelming because in 1950, most women didn’t work but now we have to. We are expected to do everything + full time job+ taking care of aging parents and kids! We have to multitask so much, we have no time for ourselves. Truth be told, I put feelings aside to make everyone’s life better but I can’t say that I haven’t suffered for it!
This is why the happiest women are single and childfree. It makes sense, because they don't have to deal with all these mysoginistic demands.
Another note. I was watching an interview between a psychologist and a divorce lawyer maybe a month or so ago. One thing they said was a frequent trait of narcissists is that they will secretly record conversations as well as instigate and direct the conversations.
Well I inserted that last part on my own but it's obvious if they are recording then they will influence the tone of the discussion.
If you have divorced a narcissist you might want to get your residence swept for electronic bugs.
If you married a true narcissist you married a person who is dangerous because they cannot admit their part.
I totally believe James is a narcissist. He threw a party and was bragging about how the cars were lined up on the street. James has issues!
He was talking about you need to keep his name out his mouth. I listened to this video with you and your girlfriends. It was girl talk. You spoke your mind in a pleasant way. It was not mean spirited! I listened to James's last video. He has so much hate in his heart. I don't think he is good for any woman until he has spent a substantial amount of time being honest with himself.
That might never happen.
this isn’t true… many people who are actually the victim of narcissists have MANY recordings of conversations because narcissists gaslight their significant others and so many victims record things for proof
Lily, I soooo happy you got some intelligent soul sisters to relate to. They are great.
Yes I agree souls sister's 3 Queen's friends
You guys needs to do this very often.
Mazelee,
Nothing was ever handed to you. Just like your Dad, you worked for every bit of your accomplishments. You are deserving of every recognition you can get. All of us have to climb up to your level, and not the other way around. Lots of respect to you...
I love girl talk! We give each other so much insight and advice
이런 대화 공유해주셔서 감사합니다
많은 생각이 드네요
So happy to see both of you guys in one video
많은 이야기가 공감이 되네요
아이키울때 경제적으로 힘들고 남편마저 도와주지 않는다면 이혼각이죠.
인생은 참 힘듭니다.😢
Mazelee 가치관이 너무 좋네요! 현명한 친구를 두셨네요
Lol 😂 oh my gosh Lily. The edits of the “don’t put this things” put things so out of context. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤👏👏👏👏👏im rolling in laughter girl
I love everything with the edit 😆 You telling Mazelee “you don’t need any ice cream;” suddenly cuts to Mazelee with ice cream 🍦 💀
I am glad you enjoyed the video! Miss you girlfriend!
넘 좋은 대화인거같아요 🥹🩷🩷
oohh Boy...I can hear James response video already!! Lmao
Can't wait! This hopeless woman is digging herself into the mud because James clap back with receipts and not vague speech
Even though I do not agree with everything you guys said, I think the video is very informative and I like to hear about other people's opinions and views. Mazelee sounds like such a fun person to hang around with and I love how you guys can entertain each other with the talks and laughing!! All the best to your families
I LOVE Alena (MAZELEE)!! She’s so funny, so Beautiful, very Wise & A Great friend!!!!!
This is what we need as women perspective on what it's like being a single mom etc finding love Again being the only one in the house to make the decisions all by yourself so many things that you and even moms with partners have to do every day you ladies should do a podcast you can do it from your homes don't have to be together physically to do it
Dads should be capable of doing everything that moms do. If both people work, it’s going to be hard for both people to raise kids and take care of the house. But women are still expected to do all of it. It’s called “the second shift.” Men just make me sad.
이 영상을 이제야 보게 되었는데 너무너무너무 좋은 영상인 것 같아요. 마치 다큐멘터리를 보는 것 같아요. 미혼 여성, 기혼 여성 혹은 이혼 여성 모두에게 결혼에 대해 많은 생각을 하게 하네요! 좋은 영상 정말 감사해요
Lily from what I've seen of you and the girls you're an amazing mom don't let anyone tell you any different❤
Some marriages are broken from the start, but the relationship is so far in ( children ) that some women stay. I'd say...if the relationship is full of red flags, both are miserable and have no respect for each other, then whats the point. Divorce is and ending and a new start.
Also when it comes to children, communication is key.
bro its always three friends that stay together like having more than three friends is to much for me tbh
Same issue in my home. If I want to snack, I have to check on everybody if they want snack but hubby has no problem going to kitchen and filling his plate. And he act surprised when I ask “ did you at least ask kids if they want…”, he’ll say “so what are you here for?” 😳😳 He knows what he’s doing. When he’s in the right mood he’s a lot more careful with his words because I don’t play, otherwise we even had to call cops at times because things get heated. And I told him million times, don’t ever think you are going to say whatever and I’m just going to sit back and take it….😖😖😖 Hes so freaking immature…20 years later and he still doesn’t know how to budget, addicted to Amazon but makes me ask for every twenty bucks🫤 Sounds like James already made decision, didn’t want to stay so he was looking for any reason to fight…
Mazelee and you hanging out is so genuine! This is a duo we all need! All three of you are blessed regardless of marriage status! Stay beautiful and strong ladies! 👏🏾💯🫶🏾
I get asked all the time why I won't get marry or date. I just see it as pointless and not giving up all the resources I worked hard for. Hell nah!
Exaclty! I be like is it worth it? Cause i sure don’t want it to end up like this
Lily are a remarkable woman and it show in how you. deal with life the good and bad ! Am so glad that you had good women friend to talk to ! Sending nothing but love and respect you and your family ! ❤😊
Marriage is a labor of love and it is a commitment to your partner for life until death do you part, there are legitimate reasons to separate or divorce but if you can stay together by all means work it out!
Unfortunately man women to respect this virtue. They don't fully fully understand this, and this is reflected in their behavior in marriage.
So happy you have such good friends. That's awesome.
love this conversation so much. learn a lot from watching this video
What a great conversation. I just met Lily online but I have been following the Mazelee’s for more than a year. Three intelligent women getting right to the core of it. If he truly loved you he wouldn’t disrespect you and if he had to work a second job to pay for a housekeeper he would. Seems like when you made money and he didn’t it affected his self esteem so he had to come for you when the tables turned. Plus his being from another culture. And did he have preconceived notions about you Lily thinking you would be more submissive coming from your cultural background. This is one of my top 5 videos I have watched this years. 💜💜
I just turned 20 and my Momma always tells me “I know it’s time for you to explore and maybe get a boyfriend. But… you don’t NEED a person for you to love yourself and be happy, having that companionship is amazing and to have someone love you is nice to have. But you also have to think about YOUR well being emotionally and mentally.
Always have your own money and separate bank accounts
Ive never seen james disrespect lily on camera WHEN they were together. Now behind camera i dont know but ive also seen a side of lily that is questionable
Well, I saw it. I don't remember what the video was about, but I commented that he needed to give his wife an unreserved apology. He responded to my comment by, basically, cursing me out. If that is the way that he responded to a subscriber, I can't imagine how he treated her behind the scenes. By the way, I agree that several things she does are red flags, including not respecting her children's privacy.
Yeah I totally agree with the other comment. Honestly every video I’ve watched before with him in, he just seemed so disrespectful and also I always noticed that Lily seemed far more invested in encouraging the girls to embrace their black heritage than James did. He gave me bad vibes on all those videos and reminded me of my own dad a lot. I can only imagine what he was like off camera
@@sherwood9917 yes well if he cursed you out that was totally wrong. At the end of the day I wish them both well
Soo true about Core Values Alena.Once that is broken,its hard to keep a relationship.Whether you are the most beautiful successful and talented person you think you are😢
Wise words from 2 amazing friends
I feel like having Life Lessons from you. Stay Strong❤.
Interesting talk. You guys are funny together and made me laugh 😂
Probably my favorite video you’ve done yet! Loved this! So candid and real and enjoyable to watch I felt like I was walking and talking w u guys
Nice to have girlfriends who understand 🎉🎉
When they turn 11, or twelve, maybe even now, they can get a lawyer, who will represent them, and, make sure they are allowed to do dance/gymnastics. And the parents have to comply, with the court order. Check into it, for the sake of the girls, cause, We all see, there talents being oppressed✌🏾🙏🏾❤️
Lily and James have very different parenting styles…
I love that your friends are still friends, to me you're a family God bless your friends/family stay connected.....👋🏿😌🙏🏿❤️. I love your videos.
@Lily petals ❤️🙏🏿😌👋🏿
I enjoy it this video (twice)
This video is very interesting.
I'm glad...three ladies talk about divorce.
Great and Interesting Video Lily!!!👍🏾👍🏾
Your happiness should be no 1, there's no need being in a relationship you're not happy
Do a podcast together ☺️😎
Yes pls 2024🎉🎉
Lilly, you are a great mom! It seemed like you were a good wife too. You were very supportive, you always looked beautiful, and you liked to have fun. Marriage is difficult. It takes two people to compromise, forgive, and grow together with similar goals and dreams. It helps if you can find a recreational activity that you both enjoy. I wished that you could have stayed single between the divorce and dating so that you can find happiness with yourself. I hope this new relationship works out for you. ❤
Hearing their advice on marriage, it's the worst. Hearing them say don't put that in the clip, even more, miss leading. Both women are basis of a particular side. Lily why bring this to the platform. You went the through whole divorce without a word. Now it seems like you want a hate mob against James. Your SIMP boyfriend is encouraging this behavior. You would never put your personal business on your platform when you and James were together. He wouldn't allow it. Do better Lily.
Stop complying with toxic men and projecting on this woman for living. He's a control freak and an ass. She deserves love and support, not some narcissistic, toxic man who is bratty and spoiled. You speak too highly of him... sounds like you want him. Good luck.
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.
Proverbs 4:23 NLT
Such a fun video of good friends having some free time from their busy schedules. But I am reminded of a story that I ran across years ago. A couple in Germany had divorced. But it was not for the reasons that you might at first imagine. They had been married for a round two years, when the wife could no longer take it. You see, they both had full time jobs, which is fine, but the husband drove his wife crazy. Because as soon as they both got home he would have her sit down and lunge around while he did all the house work and continued to not let her participate in any of the housework. Not that he would fault her for anything, but it was his habit to do it himself and not allow her to do this. I guess she wanted to help but he would never let her contribute so she finally divorced him. But there was another story I heard that is so sad. Because one couple married and divorced soon after because he was from a poor family and she came from a wealthy family. He wanted to lavish her with gifts, but just did not have the means to do it. She on the other hand lavished him with gifts and it was that difference that caused their split...Sad that marriages broke up for such reasons...
Forgiveness and reconciliation are still available. Sometimes people learn from their shortcomings
오랜만에 채널 왔는데 릴리님 얼굴 너무 밝아져서 보기 좋네요! 늘 응원할게요~!
Thank you so much for this video. I learned soo much from you guys. I am also divorced and I am dating again and this conversation you guys had helped me to understand so many things. This will help me a lot, so thank you❤
The problem was/is Lily is lazy and inconsistent. She doesn’t put enough hard work and consistency into her channel to grow it into an actual profitable channel. And she also wasn’t putting in enough hard work into taking care of the home. Lily half as***s everything. Half complete, half passion. I don’t know if Alena is the right person to seek advise from because Alena is HIGHLY driven, motivated and has a STRONG sense of self challenge, self direction. Alena helps drive her home to bigger heights, she keeps improving herself, seeking educational opportunities, had grown her TH-cam channel to a huge following, all while having eight kids? I feel like Lily should have been asking for advice about how to get her drive and passion back, not about divorce.
agreed
You miss the point. If half-assing something takes 100% of all your energy when you’re with the wrong person then it’s almost impossible to give anything more. Lily gives all of herself in her relationships and in our relationship there is nothing half-ass about it. She is highly-driven, loving, and achieving from first-hand experience. Sometimes when you’re in the wrong or even toxic relationship the output looks nothing like when you’re with the right person who empowers and encourages you to be the best versions of yourselves . This is my takeaway from this video.
1. Her channel is very profitable. She was at one point making more money than her ex.
2. Do you sit in her house all day to know how she spends her time. Who are you to watch a 17 minute clip of a persons life then decide what they really do in their home on a day to day basis. 3. She is not lazy for not wanting to be tasked with raising children alone cooking cleaning and working full time while her husband only works. As someone with an African parent that is a cultural difference issue. Most woman with drive don’t want to live like that. Alena herself said her husband does not expect that crap at home. Most of you keyboard warriors judging her are sitting around at home just typing and living in a mess. Judge yourself this way and stop writing nonsense on the internet.
네 인생이나 잘 살아. 너 릴리보다 못살잖아.
I always thought James was a jerk. But you know what they say one man's junk is another man's treasure.
Core values being the same is a compatibility factor because that will help you get along better.
I love your friendship so much haha thank you for sharing!
Omg I watch both your channels I was surprised when I saw the thumbnail 😂so excited❤
I like the way Lilly was listening 😊
릴리님 항상 응원합니다!!
Jame....James...James....Just move on!!!
When I used to watch your videos with James, I always felt there was something a little off with him. I didn’t see a long term connection between the two of you. As a woman who’s been in a marriage that wasn’t genuine it seemed similar to me. All the best to you and the kids🙏🏽
I can hang wit y'all, I enjoyed a conversation I wasn't even apart of
웃는 얼굴이 이쁜 릴리님💗
I don’t think Lily or James presented truth or behaved in the best interest of your children. I can see you both love your children and I pray you find peace moving forward.
I love Alaina’s vibe , she reminds me of my mom so much
❤❤❤❤❤Queridas! Adoro teu canal!
어쩜 저렇게 말씀들을 쫄깃하게 하실까! 너무 매력적인 분들이시고, 너무 재미있었어요^^
I love you Lilly
❤
Hang in there.😊
Stay strong Lily! ❤
Everyone have problems if thay say thay don’t have problems thay are not telling the truth …
Don't put private if it's for posting
Haha cute love y’all’s relationship ❤️
I mean why is Alena talking? saying “get rid of your man” when she he has a husband?
I think she’s speaking from the perspective of her first husband.
@@TH-camr11111 ironically promoting the single lifestyle while being married. interesting.
@ashleybaby. 😊 The first husband she was married to was verbally and physically abusive to Alena. So she left, she knows her worth not to stay in a toxic marriage.
@@headtonixthis is her 3rd baby dad
James is a male, not a man. Real men don’t disrespect women, especially their wives. Also, real men don’t complain about women or slander women on the internet. That’s weak emotional behavior.
So her does nothing all day apart take the kids to school and she can't even cook a meal?
You are only going by one side and haven't listened to the recording of HER disrespecting HIM. It goes both ways.
@@karinajaswell my husband stays at home all day and I work and he does nothing.
@@asldfkadj8493 If she does nothing all day then that’s an issue. It’s still his fault because he didn’t properly vet her before marrying her. A woman has to be vetted first before marriage to see if she’s willing to follow the man’s lead.
Exactly!👏🏽
Oh wow 🤩 didn’t know Akeeba! And that you are friends with Alena!!!! 🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤
The 3 of you are so cute! Look fun to go out with, interesting convo
🤣🤣🤣🤣 at first I thought Alena was divorceing joe hahaha
Me too I checked their channel and everything😂
You kidding??! Joe is soooo in to his lady.... And his family, he ain't going anywhere
@@starryknight776 Exactly!!!!!
I was about to do that just now lol
Lol 😂😅
Lily, you got the best of friends, Mazelee & Akeba. Stay in the light & love. ❤love❤
Women's health and talk. Lots of love to you all, Amen 🙏 and Amen 🙏
I loved the fact that yall laughed too much and the “bleeps” became comical.. laughter is medicine ❤
세 분 말씀 진짜 다 공감 ㅜㅠ
They keep it real 😊😊😊😊
하늘이 너무 예뻐요
Good great people, love you guys 😘
BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER . THEY ARE BITTER AND THEY HAVE TO SUPPORT AND CONSOLE EACH OTHER
How are they bitter when they have bfs?
I love this friendship ❤❤❤ yall are so funny 😊
Just nice to see another video from you.
I love that you’re still friends 🥰
Damn yall had some horrible men in your lives, I've been married for 29yrs, and never needed my wife to cook and clean etc,.. we both did it when we felt like it..
Unfortunately, some men only seek relationships for a f**k buddy and a glorified housekeeper to cater to them, NOT an actual marriage that involves communication skill, or sharing equal responsibilities.
Amazing Collab! 👏
That’s definitely not the problem
There is more to it probably that lily is not saying… but James is already busy editing a video to tell us the really reason.
Thirsty...
Lily You are a strong women and you are going to strive Girl
May God bless you and your children ❤❤
🥰 how they going out for a walk and just chillin
Miss Lily go back to Jesus and pray for his will. ❤ to you and your children
Thank you for sharing Lilly.
Lilly you deserve to be happy❤
I accidentally came across this video and I feel same thing I going through now 😊