How To Handle Small Talk As An Introvert 👏
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ต.ค. 2021
- #smalltalk #charisma #introvert #kanye #foryou #fyp
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Answer me this question: why should we change our behaviour? When somebody asks me a question, I answer it. I don't go around on a tangent like you seem to want people to do... Entertaining an extrovert isn't good enough argument to me
@@DarthGTB this is an honestly valid point. I don't see the purpose of entertaining someone who doesn't evoke my interest.
M
@@DarthGTB 7j7j7j
I just let people talk. They love to hear themselves talk….
Why is Jimmy asking closed-end questions anyway? How about: What's your process for designing or styling clothes or even choosing your kids outfits?
Exactly. Shouldn’t have asked him yes/no questions.
Because Kanye is a seasoned celebrity, probably did a rehearsal/knew the questions ahead of time, and if he wasn’t being a dick he could have kept the conversation going. But he only cares about himself and also probably wanted to be rude to Jimmy
@@90MysteriumFascinans or he was just answering them bluntly as a joke?
Asking a close-ended question doesn't mean you have to give a close ended answer.
I don’t know how Kimmel got his job. His monologues are rarely funny, and as an interviewer he’s only so-so. The last great late night talk show hosts were Letterman, Conan, and Craig Ferguson.
As an introvert, no. I don't want to arrive at a conversation, I want it to end. So I'll answer it literally and to the point. Doing anything else is uncomfortable, it's not what I do.
😂 facts
We are elite but you better have something to show for it otherwise your handicapped.
💯💯💯
@@miloisland3034 ngl this sounds self-entitled. As a present-extrovert, old-introvert, I empathize with both sides. You’re not above someone just bc you want to talk about the meaning of life 24/7.
I find that even small conversations help me get to know the person better and tbh I love people and think everyone has their own interesting story. I also understand some people are more reserved, so I don’t push myself onto them.
Just bc the convo isn’t philosophically deep doesn’t mean it has no value or that you’re “above” them.
@@miloisland3034 respect man, I can relate to a lot of the things you are saying ✊
All those tips are literally "don't be an introvert" 🤣
You can be confident as an introvert. I’m an introvert but when I know someone actually wants to talk to me I can talk to them with ease but I just can’t hang around people for extended periods of time, alone time is important. Kanye is an introvert but socially awkward too.
Thaaank you
_"Oh you have cancer? Just stop having cancer. It's simple as that"_
Me as an introvert: "I don't get it lol that doesn't make any sense to me"
As an introvert I already know who's worth sharing my time with and who's not.
In this video Kanye doesn't think this other guy is worth his time. Period
As an introvert most conversation is painful so creating openings to keep the conversation going is only going to prolong the torture.
Actually, the person was being a bad host by asking yes or no questions. It doesn't leave opportunity to give a detailed answer.
Yep, as a physician, it is key to ask open ended questions to get information especially from introverted patients...
Bad interviewer
This isnt kanyes first rodeo. Even grown introverts know basic conversational skills, you have to to get by in this world. He could easily have pivoted to his feelings about clothes, his kids, the fashion industry etc but chose not to.
@@RR-xm9iu so what? Who cares? It’s a late night show and not a conversation with his family. He can answer however he likes. And clearly he was able to “get by” in this world. Don’t know why it’s important or desirable for everybody to be the same 🙇🏻♂️
As an introvert I would rather have no conversation at all
Why do we always need to accomodate extroverts? It’s time people start thinking about how to accomodate introverts. This should be “how to have a deep conversation with an introvert” :)…. We should stop making Introverts feel like it’s their job to make a conversation “not awkward”.
Simply extroverts are too stupid to have any deep conversation
As an introvert I don't want to move into deeper conversation. Jeez, I want to be done with conversation.
Relatable hahahaha
Why should introverts adhere to the norm of extroverts? Another way to get through small talk is for the extrovert to shut up for a minute.
Or to talk about something important.
My family always asks me sarcastically "Why don't you talk" and I'm like "Why do you talk so much just leave me alone."
Exactly.. or what if we don’t even want to talk the person
We enjoy deep conversation or even shorter conversation but like u said it needs to be meaningful
So how do you expect people to start a conversation? Cause let's say I'm an extrovert interested in something that you couldn't care less about. But I find it meaningful so I just dive right into it. Now you're in a worse place than just having small talk w another person
Meh, im a quiet guy in the sense that i don't act like a Jim Carrey or a Robin Williams but i can hold a convo easily as long as it's a subject that im actually interested in, but when people start small talk (which are usually strangers and not people i know anyway) they can tell pretty quickly that im not interested and they'll just shut up. They always seem a bit offended though lol.
As an introvert I avoid guesting on talk shows
As an introvert, how about extroverts just take the hint that we don’t want to small talk with you, most of it is bs anyway, ppl are fake nice and then will talk about you behind your back, the less you tell people the less they can use it against you. Let people be themselves, not everyone wants to adhere to other people’s way of living.
small talk just depends on how unimportant YOU think a topic is. if the other person is genuinely into talking to you instead of moving along quickly then why not get them interested in your personality. extroverts can make anything at least entertaining bc they're creative.
@@OmfgHiii I can understand you to an extent but how many people do you think small talk because they are genuinely interested in you as opposed as small talking because it makes them feel less awkward/they don’t know what else to do. I don’t feel the need to small talk because I don’t feel awkward not talking. Most just talk for the sake of it with no real meaning behind it whilst I am ok with my thoughts and being left alone.
Sweetie, that's not introversion, that's cynicism. I'm afflicted with that as well.
@@barbarahecht4617 oh, we’ll I’ll take that as a compliment
*mic drop*
I think this video assumes that introverts want to extend conversations. We don’t.
Not true. Deeper conversation is appreciated, especially in small groups.
@@Alex.Kalashnik No, it’s not. For an introvert, one who loses energy by interacting with others, complete silence and alone is a necessity. Call during my quiet and see if I answer.
@@HeatherHotcakes Call 😂 that mention of calling made me laugh.
into deeper conversation? i don’t want to have no conversations period
YOUR DP 😂🤣
Exactly. I so feel that. We have enough talking in our head !
I’m an extrovert (both actually, but I get my energy from being around people) and I needed this. I HATE small talk and I would MUCH RATHER talk about something deep and passionate. the stereotypes aren’t always true y’all.
Lol both yeah okay
@@tudidjjd537 extroverted and introverted exist on a spectrum my guy
@@tudidjjd537 It's called ambivert. It combines traits of extroversion and introversion.
If Kanye doesnt do something, it's because he doesnt want to, not because he can't 😂
Kanye is an egomaniac, not an introvert.
How to handle small talk as an introvert: Avoid talking to people.
Precisely, but then people tell you you are wrong for being that way like everyone should live their lives the same way or something, fuck em.
@@Will-gg1zr my parents think I should see a psychologist just because I love spending time alone.
@@b.unicornette7734 some people just can’t understand people who are different to them and think there is something wrong with you for not being like them or thinking the way they do, I’ve learnt that they’ll never understand so it’s pointless trying to make them understand. Every time I try to explain my view it just turns into arguments and I hate arguing with people so I’ve gave up explaining.
@@Will-gg1zr you took words out of my mouth. It's so accurate what you said. I try to justify everything, they drive me crazy. They make me feel I'm the crazy one when I'm so peaceful being around nobody.
And I end up very angry and misundertood, arguying and disapointed. So I avoid talking, I just stop talking because it's too exhausting.
@@Will-gg1zr Yeah I just ignore people that are like "you should talk more"
The host was terrible because he was asking closed ended questions.
He should have asked open ended questions like “how do you come up with fashion ideas” “how do your children feel about the outfits”, etc.
Kanye did all that for the entertainment. He did it not because he is introverted he did it because he wanted that awkwardness.
Kanye likely can't help it he obviously lives in a different reality.
He’s an egomaniac, so, yeah.
Too much for your comprehension to let the man live
He’s definitely a narcissist
Not only for introverts, also for Scandinavians and Germans Imao.
Nah - I just let my mind drift into the vast Abyss of Consciousness and ignore any of the other person's awkward feelings. Sometimes - I'll ask them a question to ease their anxiety, but usually, I just change my gaze into anything but the person, and the pressure for them to continue the conversation fades. Then, when they have something to say, I immediately give them my full attention. Worked wonderfully today, and we were literally sitting directly in front of eachother. I dunno, something about them seeing my comfort in complete silence gave them permission to too feel okay in silence.
Really related to this one 🙌🏼 Shift the energy instead of being shifted by it.
This isn’t so much ‘How to handle small talk _as an introvert,’_ it’s more ‘If you’re an introvert and people talk to you, don’t be an introvert anymore.’
It’s actually fairly offensive because it’s pinning the problem (of interacting with other people) on us instead of asking other people to be more respectful of boundaries and find ways to interact with introverts but also make them feel comfortable.
Instructions unclear, got a restraining order.
😂
Instructions unclear: Instructions unclear: Instructions unclear.
Those three points were a choice he can speak when he wants to
There is no deep conversation to talk shows...wow. The real world is outside.
Asking about what people do to be creative and their passions is not small talk. These are penetrating and personal questions. I am an introvert. The reason these questions are difficult is because of their spotlight effect.
can't stress number two enough people actually get bored and when you take every question or hypothetical literally
So its the introvert's responsibility to turn the conversation into an interesting one - when the person asking the questions is asking boring, "small talk" questions? Nah.
Silence is Bliss
He’s just being himself he doesn’t want to change for other people which I understand
I need to learn how to small talk,I know it’s a great ice breaker but I suck at it lol
Some people just don’t have the time or energy for bullshit!
Bring a positive attitude to an introvert and you’ll get a positive response.
Dull questions and comments bring a dull response.
As an introvert, I DO want to continue a conversation, but I feel that any answer I give to ANY question is irrelevant because there is no real purpose to it. I don't care about it. They don't care about it. So I opt not to enter the conversation at all. I wish I didn't think that much into it. Things would be a lot easier.
I don't want to arrive in a "deeper conversation". I don't want to have a conversation.
Extroverts need this lesson more than introverts. Theyre the ones who incessantly babble on about nothing. Introverts wouldn't have trouble if extroverts actually cared to have a conversation both parties are interested in.
Kanye is egoistic not introverted, there’s a difference
Spoken like a true extrovert
Maybe Kanye just thought the questions were boring.
Well in all fairness, clooney
hasn’t made a decent watchable movie in 20’years
leave kanye alone
Kanye knew he could have done those things, he just didn’t care
Love this
More people need to hear this stuff
I’m not introverted nor extroverted. These are labels with their own energies. I consider each label a one size fits all pack of nonsense. I like small talk it’s a simplified warm up, its a simple approach which connects to the others gently and non intrusively. I don’t see why it’s considered either or . To run around only discussing big topics immediately is not reasonable in fact it seems exhausting and unnecessary. Nobody would expect every other / another person to immediately get into heavier lifting. It’s polite to gently feel the other person , sure they may want to get into some heavier lifting and what is heavier lifting is subjective and based on how you perceive life. I honestly find the internet really frustrating for these binary labels which reinforces over simplified versions of people and reality. It’s disabling and reductive of quality in many regards. Small talk can be blissfully beautiful, if you appreciate it. There is actually nothing more beautiful than the simple daily communications between people as they carry out their activities of daily living in peace. It’s the connective part s which holds larger parts in place but life is paradoxical because the small things do build to create the bigger picture. It’s this interconnectedness of parts of different size proportions and weight which makes up this multidimensional universe we see before us appearing as ‘our lives’ . I believe concern about small talk indicates something else . The life is missing some parts which make it streamlined , and concerns like this subsequently crops up
Here are 3 ways to force conversation and be fake.
Extroverts typically ask a close ended (yes or no) question 9 times outta 10, while expecting a deep and rich thought out answer. You’re already wasting our time, so why would I dig deep and answer your pointless question that goes nowhere 😄 ??
😭 LIKE if you have ever been stuck in a boring conversation 😂
Pro tip: it’s all about good questions.
"How to overthink shit"
No there's no point in taking an opportunity in a conversation that does not matter that's the whole thing if you want to have a conversation with us bring up something that matter something that's real something that has substance. That's something that doesn't matter because it doesn't matter to us to talk about things that don't matter that aren't real that have nothing to do with reality and doesn't have substance it's not interesting it's not going to keep our attention and we don't care to talk about it plain and simple. Make it worth her time to talk about. Or it simply just isn't worth the time to acknowledge 👍
Next question, Kanye, do you like fish sticks?
As an introvert, I don’t want to talk to anyone
Introverts don’t want it to be a deeper conversation tho…
Way to complicated for me
How to have a conversation
He is a bad interviewer. He should not ask Kanye yes or no question but rather questions that allow the interviewee to explain or elaborate. Like, Why do you like to choose your kids clothes?
Now, being an introvert is one thing, but these days, everyone thinks they’re introverted just because they don’t want to, or don’t know how to TALK TO PEOPLE. Imagine living in a time when you have to literally take people step by step, and teach them how to talk to each other as full grown adults, because as a child they weren’t forced into any type of social interactions, simply because they seemed shy, when in reality they just didn’t know how to converse, yet.. *sigh* Parents these days.. Someone could start a conversation with a socially neglected kid, and the parents are always like, “Oh, he doesn’t like to talk, he’s shy! Don’t mind him.” *pat pat* rendering the child void of humanity, unable to learn how to interact with other people, and missing out on the opportunity to grow, but instead they just give them the opportunity to just not talk to anyone, which helps no one… I mean, in my childhood days, my parents would have shoved me forward, and said, “He’s talking to you. It’s rude to ignore people.” and so I would have to talk to them, and eventually I would get better and better, and that, my good fellows, is how I was brought up to learn how to talk to other human beings. It turns out, all you need is practice, practice, practice. #prayforgenz
True💯
What you described is exactly the way I was brought up. This is why I’m now a socially anxious awkward 25 yr old woman who has like close to zero social skills. I can talk to people my age but anyone older I feel like we’re a different species lol
This comment section is based AF. I’m so glad I’m not the only introvert watching who almost completely disagreed with the advice in this video.
Oh please.
Introverted =\= socially awkward ...
Convershashion
Nope. The questions are close ended so it was a yes-no answer...secondly the questions are soooooooo shallow
Kanye didn’t have to do him like that but to ask a known fashion designer if he has fun picking or designing his kids outfits is like asking Adele or Beyonce if they sing to their kids and if they like singing 🙄
Here how I handle it and also my message to the poster of this video. “Oh shut the fuvk ip”
Even scripture teaches to hold your tongue.
No. What Kanye did is perfect. And honest.
My question is why isnt this information in my brain since birth? What is the point of a society if i cannot be engineered
But how do you avoid or get out of small talk lol
He doesn't really like exposing his kids to the public and the industry.
“As aN IntrOverT blah blah blah” Jesusss 🤣 get out of the comments then. Y’all out here talking though 🤦🏽♀️
Kanye was a bad example. He can talk. The reason for his short answers was he does not like Jimmy Kimmel, or at least doesn’t agree with his politics. And of course Kimmel was trying to duck the elephant in the room.
If Kanye didn't like him he wouldn't have come on the show.
@@14DANESSJ No. Kanye is confrontational. That is why he went on the show.
I hate small talk. When I have something to say its said summarily , if not , you won't here a word from me also I'm an introvert.
What he hell are you suppose to do, when it is snowing and someone on the road say "it's snowing".
What the hell do I say.
what is the point of the question. It's snowing it's obvious. Get on with your life. PLEASE.
Depends on the context. If it's winter I'd give them a sarcastic response. If it's during the summer, I'd make a profound statement about the weather.
This video does not give enough examples. Like how does one take control? Don't just tell, show!
Why so many instructions?
If Kanye is such an introvert, why didn't he stay home instead of going on a "Talk Show" where guests are expected to "talk" with the host in front of an audience who paid to see said "talk"?
but see I watch Kanye west interviews multiple times…so…..
Sounds like an awful lot of trying too hard to impress someone else. Don’t care enough.
People with personality disorders don't talk about their feelings - so it's obvious that Kanye will never "bring his feelings into conversation"...
Just be yourself. You don't need advice on how to be you
All those super introverted folks in the comments be like "how dare you insult me like that, I don't want to engage in small talk, so leave me alone", not realising how the world doesn't always work the way you want it to. Compromise on both sides, folks. Simple as that.
I always thought of myself as suuuuper introverted. Then I spent three years studying in a city far from home not making a single friend and not talking to anyone except on the phone. It literally broke me, and whenever I read something along the lines of "but I don't want to talk to people", some voice inside of me gets triggered which is either arrogant or traumatised or both, but it just wants me to yell out, "honey, oh, you have NO idea what you're talking about."
Conversation becomes like a hunger - some need more, some need less, but eventually we all need it.
And just like extraverts need to accept that we're not always in the mood for many words, us introverts need to understand that extraverts NEED conversation, and maybe prepare at least a couple of nice words for them.
What about having deep conversations hat resonate with you? Rather waste my time on that.
How about u let Introverts be who they are. They don't LIKE talking. Period. Why are u trying to change them or give them tips to "be better people" as if somethings wrong w them..
Stop trying to fix what you don’t understand.
Don’t believe end all be all arbitrary rules like this.
This video is the worst for advice for the introvert. As an INTP you do don't enter into conversations you don't want to be in and the situation is already awkward so who cares? Bringing feelings into the conversation is the exact opposite of what an introvert wants to do. If you want to take control of the conversation ask questions to their questions. Kayne could have said yeah then asked about the CCPs treatment of the Uyghurs
Kanye failed speech class in college
All this, assuming one wants to actually talk.
Do we really wanna live in a world full of extroverts? A lot of talking about unimportant things with nobody listening. Does not seem that fun to me.
actually, Kimmel is a terrible interview and Kanye is just a little annoyed.
Mhm!
You gotta do all this sin cos tan Pythagorean theory just for small talks?
Life is complicated as it is. If you are scared of small talk it means you are scared of people.
Why? They are people like you, not aliens from planet OST.
Why bother with someone like Kanye? He's not worth the trouble
Kanye only cares about Kanye
F Kimmel
Jesus. I don’t want do any of that to make small talk. That’s why I don’t like it.
This is pure idiocy.
Hahaha that's because Kanye needs his meds
All these people on the Epstein flight logs... whoomp..