I ship out for basic in 2 weeks as a 28 year old father of 3. It’s definitely going to be a challenge being away from them for awhile, but I’ve kept in mind that this sacrifice will be worthwhile for their futures. Thanks for the great video, definitely helped tremendously.
26…. USMC Vet. Now in law enforcement. Feel absolutely lost in society without the military. I’m really wanting to go back in. I have a 1 and a half year old with my wife who is absolutely amazing.
My husband and I are discussing him rejoining the military next year after surgery and we are through with the adoption process ( adopting 5 kids). This really helped us thank you.
Glad to hear I can help in any way. Amazing to hear about your story, that is a huge commitment and I imagine you’re gonna really impact those 5 kids for the better.
I read alot about having 4kids some said no some said yes? Are they allowing you to get in with a waiver? Just wondering because i wanna join and im married with 4 kids
I’m seriously considering joining the national guard. I would honestly dive in but the kids being away for a bit about 5 months, just the thought of it destroys me. Any more advice on how to deal with that?
Ok thank you so much for your input and just doing this to help make people myself be more informed and more comfortable with the decision to into this field. I could not find videos that explained this or this in depth like you explained so thank you again.
I'm 25, I have husband and three kids. Ages, 6, 4 and almost 6 months. I've been considering joining the Air force reserves for awhile. Just a lot to process. We don't have a lot of support at all with the kids. That's my main concern. We rely on each other. There really is no village.
I’m right here with you. My wife and I have a 10mo and a 2yo. We moved states for a job opportunity and I got laid off for Covid. Just been winging it ever since. Now that the army is accepting enlistees without a GED it’s at my fingertips and more real than ever. I’m 2 test away from a GED but fuck it the only reason I was getting it was to enlist.
I’m getting ready to join the army and I have a 3 year old an soon to be 2 year old. I’m trying to see when will my kids be able to come live with me once I get to my duty station?
Wondering same thing when I join. How soon ? but I believe if not mistaken I was told by a recruiter that it’s like right after you’ve became stationed and/or right after PT training or boot camp🤷🏽♀️
Very informative! Currently thinking about joining for the stability and structure, as I am married and have 2 kids. One question, after technical school, how do you go about getting your family moved to your first assignment location? Does the service member go straight to the base location and go apartment hunting? Then once you have one secured, go home and move the family? I had seen you have a 10 day leave period but was just concerned if that was enough time to not only find a place to live but to also move everything and everyone?! Thank you!!
So you’ll get to your new unit, and you’ll enroll into deers asap. Once you get that done you’ll go apartment searching. It’ll be a long process but it’ll all work out. You should have enough time to get everything situated and I believe the military will pay for everything. I could be wrong so don’t quote me on it.
A lot of people including myself will sign leases online just through a virtual tour of the apartment. Definitely not ideal but it works out because those 10 days burn out pretty quick. Although there’s usually plenty of housing because wherever there is a Base located companies understand the value in offering plenty of apartments and house rentals.
Household goods may take several weeks or months even to deliver your belongings at least because they were backed up due to the pandemic. Months for overseas shipments like to Korea but I think everything is faster now
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer Thank you for the info! Being able to secure an apartment virtually would definitely help ease that 10 day leave situation. Thank you!
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer will you be able to move wife and kid to yr location once u graduate basics and find out where u will be stationed? or does it take longer than that ?
Im a mother of a 2 yrs old boy. My husband is in Army BMT right know, and I’m going to the Air Force (Air National Guard). I already signed and I’m very excited but also I’m very nervous about the separation between me and my child. I have heard that we have to be like 3 weeks without communication and, honestly I never have been separated from my child ever. Im trying to keep my mind positive because we’re doing this for us and for him, but it cause me anxiety just to think about my child being there without hearing his voice. 😢
Hello, thanks for this video! How have you seen things play out for an unmarried couple with a child where one partner enlists in the military? Have you seen much of that or are couples usually married prior? My concern is that if I (unmarried w/ girlfriend and child) were to enlist, if I’d be able to bring along my family considering that we are not married. Thanks in advance
Did you ever receive your masters? Thanks for this video. Worried about leaving my wife at home although I trust her judgment etc. just being away from those you love is never easy.
I’m planning to join soon hopefully I am a single mom of a two year old boy… but how does this work when you are fighting for custody? How do you balance everything? If I’m in a whole other state how would his dad see him every week or so? Or would they do it every other month etc
I believe they would have to wait until the judge finished making a ruling on custody before they would move forward but you definitely can ask the recruiter directly. I knew a guy who had sole custody of his daughter and the military could not take him because of that.
I’m joining the marines but I’m not sure if I should go reserve or active because I have a 1 year old son that lives with his mom at her parents. But I heard going active pretty much forfeits your custody rights.
im 26 with a one year old son and still want like 2 more kids, but i wanna work and gain experience as an electrician im going to school rn for it and want to go to another college after for construction management or something like that, i feel like the reserves is best for that, but the retirement is different compared to active duty and i go back and forth with which one i should enlist
my husband is active duty army and I was considering joining the Air Force/Army just not sure which branch yet. We currently have 3 littles under the age of 2. I really want to join my husband is on board as well. I am just hearing a lot of negative feedback about both parents being in and negative impacts on the children. Any advice???
I would say yeah there are probably lots of negative impacts that could have on your children. I mean both of their parents being away all the time and the possibility of losing either one of their parents or both… imo it would be a very selfish decision. You’re the mama, your babies need you to comfort them, nurture them and teach them, this is what moms were designed to do. If you weren’t a mom I’d say go for it but you are 🤷🏼♀️
Being a mom has nothing to do with whether you could or should join the military. But, it would be a big how you would do it if you're spouse is already in. Mother and fathers are both responsible for the nurturing and loving and caring for kids. We should definitely get out of the mind set that only mothers can care for their children. With that said, imo, if you are able to get lots of help with the little ones than go for it. Some people are born to soldier and serve the country. I hope you find a way. If not possibly a law enforcement job?
Do it. There are so many benefits with the military. Yes you will be busy, but you're family will be taken cared of. You're career and goals are all possible too.
I did it at 34 married with a 6 year old. Sometimes I completely forget about missing my family. Hanging out with my bros and training shenanigans and tomfoolery, time of my life. I miss throwing my daughter in the air and taking her to the park and play. Eating with them and holding my wife after work. They are being taking care of but I have been away. It will be a year by the time I am done with my pipeline. I feel powerless to the things I always took care of. Father's are like security blankets and men feel secure when they are there for there family. I was always there and now I am not. It's rough but it feels worth it. I didn't want my family see me settle for anything less than my aspirations, because what kind of example would I be teaching? I want to teach them that if you want something go for it. So that's what I am doing. Best of wishes.
I'm 33 with a 4 and a 5-year-old and I'm considering joining the army reserves (always wanted to join). However, my wife works full-time, we have very little help, and I bring in good money (so does she). I'm afraid that even getting paid during active it wouldn't even cover a small fraction of my monthly income. Do you have any suggestions? I was considering pitching it to my employer to see if they'd sponsor me, or pay me while I'm away, or at least enough to make up the difference in pay while I'm gone. If I go psych ops leadership, that would definitely support my leadership skills and feel that'd make it an easier pitch to the employer. Any direction or advice would be appreciated. My gut tells me this isn't going to happen, but I also don't want to live with regret. Thanks in advance, folks.
The biggest thing you’ll need to address is the getting help/ social support portion because you never want your spouse to be stuck with having a full-time job plus raising children which is I imagine just absolutely insanely exhausting. Everyone I know who is married in military talks about having in-laws or relatives of some sort helping support their family back home while they are training or deployed. By all means, pitch it to your employer and get as much data points as possible, but make sure that your spouse has equal rights with you on vetoing or excepting the challenge of joining the military because it definitely will be a shared effort and you will absolutely need her support While you are gone. The best case scenario is that your conscience is totally at peace knowing your family is taken care of in your absence, which I suppose can also cover the prospect of dying in combat as well, because that is a hard discussion to have and to be prepared for, so your family is always taken care of no matter what happens heavy
I’m 24, with a wife and 4 kids. I have been doing research and every is saying it’s impossible to join with 5 dependents, I would really love to join the Marine Corps or the Air Force, is it possible at all?
I’m in the mix of going Active Duty, and I have visitation with my 3 kids. At the moment 12, 8, 6. Would I still be able to get them during school breaks, summers how does that work?
Definitely ask a recruiter but from what I understand you would need to work this out with the judge first and then the plan can be verified by the recruiter to ensure it’s compatible with a federal contract. I know there are several parents watching this channel so if anybody else wants to speak up who knows the correct answer please do
I’m 26 and married with 3 children 5, 2, and 1. I was recently told by a Navy recruiter that having more then 2 dependents disqualifies me from joining. does the other branches have dependent limits, waivers, etc…
Understandable. I knew many people who did it both mothers and fathers, although it was not easy. I was definitely inspired by their courage, and it was clear that they felt very supported so that when they left home, they knew that everyone would be taken care of and their absence. It definitely takes a village
I’m 26, got a 3 year old and 1 year old, girlfriend on board and family on board(come from military family”) joining by the end of the year. Any advice?
You’re doing the ground work already. Ask advice from experienced couples where one partner had to support the other while away on military training. That is the best place to get the ins and outs of the challenges. Get examples of what went wrong and what went right. Get your girlfriend plugged into a support group of other military wives, small church group maybe or elsewhere. She will need to vent and to process information you tell her that she doesn’t quite understand about the military. Also maybe Record family videos for you kids to watch when you’re gone. And write them letters daily or however frequently sounds good
I’m 20 and wanting to join the marine corps but I find it difficult because My wife is having our daughter in a couple of months she currently live with her parents care and on my side My family depend on me to pay half the rent is there anything I can do to be finally stable
Just found this info online and it sounds like it may work out if you join after your daughter is born (congrats on that) Talk to your recruiter about this: “New military members who are attending basic training or tech school only receive BAH if they have dependents. The dependent’s location determines the BAH rate. “
Joining the Army National Guard best balance with family and current career. Where I work theres 5 part time Guards. I'll be the 6th lol Fiancee and 2 sons.
I'm 35, married and have two young boys 13 months and 3.5 years. Always wanted to join the navy since my late 20s. About once a year I always find myself getting that itch to join. I have no family that has ever joined the military before so I don't have that pressure from them. My wife would be totally against me joining. It's hard, but I think it would be very selfish of me to do join in my current situation. I have a Bachelors degree, but I just feel stuck in my career life so its hard to not think that the navy could help..:(
Can someone else on this channel please answer this? My enlisted friends in Army basic training (BCT) said that as soon as they began AIT their spouses and family could move with them. For officer candidates the families waited until BOLC started
Oh and thats just active duty. Reserve life is totally different because families stay back where they are and whenever the service member finished schools theyd head back home
Just to add I am 26 with a wife and 15 month old daughter. I believe I will go active side with my degree as e4 but my only concern is family is working to be a stay a home mom and I can relate to your video. We have a strong village I just hope she can travel with me for a while unless I go overseas. I hope our cards play out right next month.
@@petethemeatmeat6634 commissioning was the route I wanted at first because of pay but I didn't want to be blinded by that and not enjoy what I love. Officer is more managerial and my character and who I am is more of hands on person. I graduated in Bach. Cinematography. Going enlistment I will have the opportunity to be hands on vs doing paperwork aspect if that makes sense.
Im 23 years old my wife and i just got the news that we are going to be parents soon ❤. But i still want to join the Navy. (Its my dream life). What you think?
Congrats! Just as long as the family is on board with you and supported in your absence during training you should be good to go. It’s definitely a combined effort
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer it is and even doe she kinda didn't want me too at the beginning she. Said " she will support me on my dreams will be with me" That made it so mucb easier Thank you for your response
Single parents, beware. You don't automatically have the rights to pack up a child and relocate to serve the military. You might have to get permission from the other parent. That's even if he/she has been inactive in parenting. Is there a court-ordered custody, visitation agreement? The other parent has every right to object to you relocating. Since you're moving, you have to pay for the child's flight home for visits. You may not get judicial approval to pull the child out of school to move. And moms often suffer depression when away from their children in basic. I'm not trying to be overly negative, but marriage, family, and the military can be a tough combination.
I’m currently 17 right now and have a kid on the way in a couple of months and I’m thinking about joining right when I get out of high school I’m currently with the mother but I’m still thinking if it’s good idea or not
It’s an important decision to make alongside your partners. She will definitely need to be aware of and onboard with the responsibility ahead if you join. While the military provides great benefits there is a significant amount of effort and understanding required to keep relationships healthy and intact
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer yeah that’s very true and I feel like the military could be beneficial financially for my first years of being an adult and dad but at the same time I don’t know if that will ruin my relationship with my kid and my girlfriend who I want merry but thank you for the response and the video definitely helped me understand things a lot better 🙏🏾
Your heart is in the right place brother. Relationships take a tremendous amount of work and your partner is gonna have to feel supported, secure and protected when your away. Having family/church/community will help her while she’s without you. Definitely let her speak into your decision making process. It’ll take work but all relationships due. Or else they rip apart due to the constant pulling forces of opposing human egos. Humility and teamwork will be key
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer yeah that’s very true and ultimately it’ll be mainly her opinion on me going when I make my final decision about joining and by that time my kid will be 8 months old so hopefully everything will go well and I hope if I do join it’ll be a good decision but thank you again for time🙏🏾
Let me know what else U want me to post on. Btw If u get married you’ll collect housing pay that she can use even while your in training. Depending on what city your from theyll base the monthly allowance on that. Google your “BAH calculator”
I don't have kids and neither was I in the military so this might not be the most reliable opinion, but I wouldn't join the military after becoming a parent, or at least I wouldn't join full time unless I was in a situation where I was either required or it was the best/only option
I am a single mother of 1 currently waiting to ship out for Air Force active duty. I already had established a family care plan. BUT I WANT TO KNOW Can my child live with me once I get to my duty station?
My understanding is once you get orders cut for the duty station you will be heading to that is when your family can start their move. Some are able to sign leases remotely without ever visiting first while others, depending on the location have their family members travel out to look at various houses and apartments to figure out which one to sign a lease for so it kind of depends.
Does that mean you’ll be out of training by the time she has the baby? I know some folks in OCS were able to be released to see their kids being born but others were not.
hey im trying to join the military. i have 2 kids but im not with the kids mom. if i go active i have to give up custody. what if i go for the reserves indtead?
I talked to a guy in the same boat. Not sure about all the legal issues there and the family law regarding federal jobs. Definitely something recruiters can help guide you through. I hope you get the answer or direction you need
@@xd3stiny773 so question I’m in the same boat have 3 kids. Just to confirm your answer for his question for myself as well😊so 3 kids disqualifies anyone who has 3 kids or giving up custody does?
Depends on custody arrangements I think. I knew a guy who couldn’t join because he had full custody of his daughter. A recruiter will def know the regulations on this
I’ve been meaning to join since last year but I’m afraid of leaving a job that pays $20 an hour with 50 hours a week for a career in the Army that I’ve always wanted and not knowing if financially my wife and I and our two kids are going to be good or taken care of for that matter. Any thoughts on that?
I'm married and we have a preschooler, and I'm leaving for BMT next month. How do you explain to a 5 year old that you're leaving for 3 months to join the USAF and the whole idea of joining the military? Any resources, tips, etc?
I think that any topic can be explained to children if you’re using age appropriate language. I’m a single mom and my daughter was 3 when I joined. I explained to her that I would be starting a new job and going to “military school” to help better take care of her. I let her know that, unfortunately, while I was away, I wouldn’t be able to call her on the phone much, but that I would send her letters that she could read with her grandmother. When I got to AIT, we FaceTimed after class and on the weekends. Even at that age, they’re more resilient than we sometimes give them credit for. Best of luck to you in your journey!
@@3Dani. this is really helpful. How about the idea of joining the military, did she ask questions and how did you talk to her about those concepts. My son is 5 and his idea of military are his toy soldiers. Dada won’t be a solidier but rather an Airman with a different job that doesn’t involve being in the front lines. Curious how you navigate these topics and conversation? Appreciate your response!
@@mjmldz I was a public school teacher before I joined, so I just explained to her that I “won’t be teaching the big kids anymore. My new job is working on computers to keep people safe, but since I don’t know how to do it yet, the Army has to teach me.” I showed her a map so that she could see where we lived at the time, where my mom lived, and where Ft. Jackson and Ft. Huachuca are. We had to have conversations about there being a time difference between VA and AZ as well so that she knew that when I was getting out of school, it was almost her bedtime. Now, she’s 6 and she knows that “military people” wear a uniform similar to mine and that the Army told me where they needed us to get a new house so that I can fix all the computers. She needs reminders about some things sometimes, but generally, she understands now. I’m very transparent with her and let her ask as many questions as she needs to.
@@3Dani. wow. Amazing. I love the map idea. I think I’m going to steal that! And yeah, makes a lot of sense what you’re explaining here. Thank you for this insight. I leave for USAF BMT in 3 weeks!
I ship out for basic in 2 weeks as a 28 year old father of 3. It’s definitely going to be a challenge being away from them for awhile, but I’ve kept in mind that this sacrifice will be worthwhile for their futures. Thanks for the great video, definitely helped tremendously.
Active duty or reserves?
Me too:( im 28 and im leaving next month
Keep me posted on how it goes. Prayin you grow and bring light to encourage everyone youre around!
Active duty or reserve?
Dude I hope you’re going in as an officer because for a father of 3 I’d say you’d be better off learning a fucking trade!
This video was so helpful. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts!
You are welcome! Thank you for viewing and let me know how else I can help
26…. USMC Vet. Now in law enforcement. Feel absolutely lost in society without the military. I’m really wanting to go back in. I have a 1 and a half year old with my wife who is absolutely amazing.
What's "in law enforcement" mean, jail guard?
@@thomasryan2679 no I was a deputy sheriff on patrol and was on our HRWT. I’m back active in the corps again
@nathanmiller3987 first off bro ur jacked, wheres ur workout program and second tyfys. 🇺🇸9/11 Never Forget 🇺🇸
My husband and I are discussing him rejoining the military next year after surgery and we are through with the adoption process ( adopting 5 kids). This really helped us thank you.
Glad to hear I can help in any way. Amazing to hear about your story, that is a huge commitment and I imagine you’re gonna really impact those 5 kids for the better.
Great video, thank you so much!
You are welcome. Let me know what else you’d like to hear about
Grandparents nowadays help only when it's convenient for them which is such a struggle because daycare is expensive
I’m 28 with a wife and 3 kids, goin to talk to a recruiter this week. I’m hopeful on this journey 🙏🏾
God bless on the journey, hope you get what you and your family want out of it & happy fathers day!
I'll be a father next year looking to get into a 4yr contract
I’m 33 4 kids and thinking about joining started my process this week..
I read alot about having 4kids some said no some said yes? Are they allowing you to get in with a waiver? Just wondering because i wanna join and im married with 4 kids
@@samuelalvarez6051were you able to join with 4 kids? I keep seeing controversial answers
I’m seriously considering joining the national guard. I would honestly dive in but the kids being away for a bit about 5 months, just the thought of it destroys me. Any more advice on how to deal with that?
Hey I uploaded a response to your question =)
Ok thank you so much for your input and just doing this to help make people myself be more informed and more comfortable with the decision to into this field. I could not find videos that explained this or this in depth like you explained so thank you again.
I'm 25, I have husband and three kids.
Ages, 6, 4 and almost 6 months.
I've been considering joining the Air force reserves for awhile. Just a lot to process.
We don't have a lot of support at all with the kids.
That's my main concern.
We rely on each other. There really is no village.
I’m right here with you. My wife and I have a 10mo and a 2yo. We moved states for a job opportunity and I got laid off for Covid. Just been winging it ever since.
Now that the army is accepting enlistees without a GED it’s at my fingertips and more real than ever. I’m 2 test away from a GED but fuck it the only reason I was getting it was to enlist.
Thats def rough because apparently raising kids is work around the clock. Not sure to best manage that without tons of supprt
Currently 35yrs old with no kids yet. Thought about enlisting at 31yrs been studying since. But just been looking up information that's related.
I’m getting ready to join the army and I have a 3 year old an soon to be 2 year old. I’m trying to see when will my kids be able to come live with me once I get to my duty station?
Wondering same thing when I join. How soon ? but I believe if not mistaken I was told by a recruiter that it’s like right after you’ve became stationed and/or right after PT training or boot camp🤷🏽♀️
Very informative! Currently thinking about joining for the stability and structure, as I am married and have 2 kids. One question, after technical school, how do you go about getting your family moved to your first assignment location? Does the service member go straight to the base location and go apartment hunting? Then once you have one secured, go home and move the family? I had seen you have a 10 day leave period but was just concerned if that was enough time to not only find a place to live but to also move everything and everyone?! Thank you!!
So you’ll get to your new unit, and you’ll enroll into deers asap. Once you get that done you’ll go apartment searching. It’ll be a long process but it’ll all work out. You should have enough time to get everything situated and I believe the military will pay for everything. I could be wrong so don’t quote me on it.
A lot of people including myself will sign leases online just through a virtual tour of the apartment. Definitely not ideal but it works out because those 10 days burn out pretty quick. Although there’s usually plenty of housing because wherever there is a Base located companies understand the value in offering plenty of apartments and house rentals.
Household goods may take several weeks or months even to deliver your belongings at least because they were backed up due to the pandemic. Months for overseas shipments like to Korea but I think everything is faster now
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer Thank you for the info! Being able to secure an apartment virtually would definitely help ease that 10 day leave situation. Thank you!
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer will you be able to move wife and kid to yr location once u graduate basics and find out where u will be stationed? or does it take longer than that ?
Im a mother of a 2 yrs old boy. My husband is in Army BMT right know, and I’m going to the Air Force (Air National Guard). I already signed and I’m very excited but also I’m very nervous about the separation between me and my child. I have heard that we have to be like 3 weeks without communication and, honestly I never have been separated from my child ever. Im trying to keep my mind positive because we’re doing this for us and for him, but it cause me anxiety just to think about my child being there without hearing his voice. 😢
Wow keep me posted, you are brave. Hope your boy thrives while youre away and thanks for serving
Hello, thanks for this video! How have you seen things play out for an unmarried couple with a child where one partner enlists in the military? Have you seen much of that or are couples usually married prior? My concern is that if I (unmarried w/ girlfriend and child) were to enlist, if I’d be able to bring along my family considering that we are not married. Thanks in advance
I want to join after my sons 1st birthday in September just not sure what the benefits are or what my sons morher will do while im away
Did you ever receive your masters? Thanks for this video. Worried about leaving my wife at home although I trust her judgment etc. just being away from those you love is never easy.
Yes online Masters completed in 18 months. Finished it in 2021
And def understand it is difficult to leave family
Both my Parents were in the Army National Guard.
My Brother was also army and my Sister is still Air Force.
I’m sad I’ll never meet my Nephew.
My husband finished basics at 29 we have two kids my youngest just started school he’s been in about it three years I’m contemplating joining as well
I am a Future US NAVY SAILOR and I am enlisting in the US NAVY after school also I am just checking out your video
That is awesome to hear I appreciate you letting me know that I helped in some small way. And thank you for your service
I’m planning to join soon hopefully I am a single mom of a two year old boy… but how does this work when you are fighting for custody? How do you balance everything? If I’m in a whole other state how would his dad see him every week or so? Or would they do it every other month etc
I believe they would have to wait until the judge finished making a ruling on custody before they would move forward but you definitely can ask the recruiter directly. I knew a guy who had sole custody of his daughter and the military could not take him because of that.
I’m joining the marines but I’m not sure if I should go reserve or active because I have a 1 year old son that lives with his mom at her parents. But I heard going active pretty much forfeits your custody rights.
im 26 with a one year old son and still want like 2 more kids, but i wanna work and gain experience as an electrician im going to school rn for it and want to go to another college after for construction management or something like that, i feel like the reserves is best for that, but the retirement is different compared to active duty and i go back and forth with which one i should enlist
my husband is active duty army and I was considering joining the Air Force/Army just not sure which branch yet. We currently have 3 littles under the age of 2. I really want to join my husband is on board as well. I am just hearing a lot of negative feedback about both parents being in and negative impacts on the children. Any advice???
I would say yeah there are probably lots of negative impacts that could have on your children. I mean both of their parents being away all the time and the possibility of losing either one of their parents or both…
imo it would be a very selfish decision. You’re the mama, your babies need you to comfort them, nurture them and teach them, this is what moms were designed to do. If you weren’t a mom I’d say go for it but you are 🤷🏼♀️
Being a mom has nothing to do with whether you could or should join the military. But, it would be a big how you would do it if you're spouse is already in. Mother and fathers are both responsible for the nurturing and loving and caring for kids. We should definitely get out of the mind set that only mothers can care for their children. With that said, imo, if you are able to get lots of help with the little ones than go for it. Some people are born to soldier and serve the country. I hope you find a way. If not possibly a law enforcement job?
30 years old 1 son who is 15 years old but I'm single I am really gonna miss him he is my best friend I just hope he is going to be ok without me
I'm 34 and really thinking of joining. I have two boy's and ages 2 and 5
Ed that’s tough but be sure your family and spouse all are on board to support you. Ultimately it is your choice but family will carry the load too
Me too man. 29 with a 5 and 2.
Do it
Do it. There are so many benefits with the military. Yes you will be busy, but you're family will be taken cared of. You're career and goals are all possible too.
I did it at 34 married with a 6 year old. Sometimes I completely forget about missing my family. Hanging out with my bros and training shenanigans and tomfoolery, time of my life. I miss throwing my daughter in the air and taking her to the park and play. Eating with them and holding my wife after work. They are being taking care of but I have been away. It will be a year by the time I am done with my pipeline. I feel powerless to the things I always took care of. Father's are like security blankets and men feel secure when they are there for there family. I was always there and now I am not. It's rough but it feels worth it. I didn't want my family see me settle for anything less than my aspirations, because what kind of example would I be teaching? I want to teach them that if you want something go for it. So that's what I am doing. Best of wishes.
I'm 33 with a 4 and a 5-year-old and I'm considering joining the army reserves (always wanted to join). However, my wife works full-time, we have very little help, and I bring in good money (so does she). I'm afraid that even getting paid during active it wouldn't even cover a small fraction of my monthly income. Do you have any suggestions? I was considering pitching it to my employer to see if they'd sponsor me, or pay me while I'm away, or at least enough to make up the difference in pay while I'm gone. If I go psych ops leadership, that would definitely support my leadership skills and feel that'd make it an easier pitch to the employer. Any direction or advice would be appreciated. My gut tells me this isn't going to happen, but I also don't want to live with regret. Thanks in advance, folks.
The biggest thing you’ll need to address is the getting help/ social support portion because you never want your spouse to be stuck with having a full-time job plus raising children which is I imagine just absolutely insanely exhausting. Everyone I know who is married in military talks about having in-laws or relatives of some sort helping support their family back home while they are training or deployed.
By all means, pitch it to your employer and get as much data points as possible, but make sure that your spouse has equal rights with you on vetoing or excepting the challenge of joining the military because it definitely will be a shared effort and you will absolutely need her support While you are gone. The best case scenario is that your conscience is totally at peace knowing your family is taken care of in your absence, which I suppose can also cover the prospect of dying in combat as well, because that is a hard discussion to have and to be prepared for, so your family is always taken care of no matter what happens heavy
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer great advice. Thank you.
I’m 24, with a wife and 4 kids. I have been doing research and every is saying it’s impossible to join with 5 dependents, I would really love to join the Marine Corps or the Air Force, is it possible at all?
I’m in the mix of going Active Duty, and I have visitation with my 3 kids. At the moment 12, 8, 6. Would I still be able to get them during school breaks, summers how does that work?
Definitely ask a recruiter but from what I understand you would need to work this out with the judge first and then the plan can be verified by the recruiter to ensure it’s compatible with a federal contract.
I know there are several parents watching this channel so if anybody else wants to speak up who knows the correct answer please do
I’m 26 and married with 3 children 5, 2, and 1. I was recently told by a Navy recruiter that having more then 2 dependents disqualifies me from joining. does the other branches have dependent limits, waivers, etc…
There are waivers for the Army reserves. I have 7 children and am still joining.
It's different in the reserves.
Very. Much more flexible
I’m 28 and thinking about joining, but I’m really nervous of leaving my 2 year old daughter and wife alone for a couple of months.
Understandable. I knew many people who did it both mothers and fathers, although it was not easy. I was definitely inspired by their courage, and it was clear that they felt very supported so that when they left home, they knew that everyone would be taken care of and their absence. It definitely takes a village
I’m 26, got a 3 year old and 1 year old, girlfriend on board and family on board(come from military family”) joining by the end of the year. Any advice?
You’re doing the ground work already. Ask advice from experienced couples where one partner had to support the other while away on military training. That is the best place to get the ins and outs of the challenges. Get examples of what went wrong and what went right. Get your girlfriend plugged into a support group of other military wives, small church group maybe or elsewhere. She will need to vent and to process information you tell her that she doesn’t quite understand about the military. Also maybe Record family videos for you kids to watch when you’re gone. And write them letters daily or however frequently sounds good
Posted vid on military relationships that may help
I’m 20 and wanting to join the marine corps but I find it difficult because My wife is having our daughter in a couple of months she currently live with her parents care and on my side My family depend on me to pay half the rent is there anything I can do to be finally stable
Just found this info online and it sounds like it may work out if you join after your daughter is born (congrats on that)
Talk to your recruiter about this: “New military members who are attending basic training or tech school only receive BAH if they have dependents. The dependent’s location determines the BAH rate. “
Joining the Army National Guard best balance with family and current career. Where I work theres 5 part time Guards. I'll be the 6th lol Fiancee and 2 sons.
I'm 35, married and have two young boys 13 months and 3.5 years. Always wanted to join the navy since my late 20s. About once a year I always find myself getting that itch to join. I have no family that has ever joined the military before so I don't have that pressure from them. My wife would be totally against me joining. It's hard, but I think it would be very selfish of me to do join in my current situation. I have a Bachelors degree, but I just feel stuck in my career life so its hard to not think that the navy could help..:(
Posted a video on this now. “Joining military = reboot”
If you have a degree go officer. Not enlisted. Better pay, leadership position.
@@KrystalMcKnight I didn’t know you could go straight to an officer?
@@brianstanart5917 100% you sure can! Find an officer recruiter you will go to officer candidate school (OCS) rather than bootcamp.
I had to go boot camp (basic) and then ocs (officer candidate school). That’s for federal ocs but perhaps you mean for him to go for rotc?
I’m hoping of joining the air force soon. My son will be 1 on the 31st. I’m a single mom. About how long will it be before my son can live with me?
Can someone else on this channel please answer this? My enlisted friends in Army basic training (BCT) said that as soon as they began AIT their spouses and family could move with them. For officer candidates the families waited until BOLC started
Oh and thats just active duty. Reserve life is totally different because families stay back where they are and whenever the service member finished schools theyd head back home
Just to add I am 26 with a wife and 15 month old daughter. I believe I will go active side with my degree as e4 but my only concern is family is working to be a stay a home mom and I can relate to your video. We have a strong village I just hope she can travel with me for a while unless I go overseas. I hope our cards play out right next month.
I also have a degree, so I have to ask, why would you want to enlist instead of commissioning?
@@petethemeatmeat6634 commissioning was the route I wanted at first because of pay but I didn't want to be blinded by that and not enjoy what I love. Officer is more managerial and my character and who I am is more of hands on person. I graduated in Bach. Cinematography.
Going enlistment I will have the opportunity to be hands on vs doing paperwork aspect if that makes sense.
I wanna drop my commission and go warrant officer. If I don’t join coast guard
Im 23 years old my wife and i just got the news that we are going to be parents soon ❤.
But i still want to join the Navy. (Its my dream life).
What you think?
Congrats! Just as long as the family is on board with you and supported in your absence during training you should be good to go. It’s definitely a combined effort
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer it is and even doe she kinda didn't want me too at the beginning she. Said " she will support me on my dreams will be with me"
That made it so mucb easier
Thank you for your response
Single parents, beware. You don't automatically have the rights to pack up a child and relocate to serve the military. You might have to get permission from the other parent. That's even if he/she has been inactive in parenting. Is there a court-ordered custody, visitation agreement? The other parent has every right to object to you relocating. Since you're moving, you have to pay for the child's flight home for visits. You may not get judicial approval to pull the child out of school to move. And moms often suffer depression when away from their children in basic. I'm not trying to be overly negative, but marriage, family, and the military can be a tough combination.
So can I join the Army if I have custody of my daughter? I'm trying to go active
Yes
@@oshynblair7907 yes what
I’m currently 17 right now and have a kid on the way in a couple of months and I’m thinking about joining right when I get out of high school I’m currently with the mother but I’m still thinking if it’s good idea or not
It’s an important decision to make alongside your partners. She will definitely need to be aware of and onboard with the responsibility ahead if you join. While the military provides great benefits there is a significant amount of effort and understanding required to keep relationships healthy and intact
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer yeah that’s very true and I feel like the military could be beneficial financially for my first years of being an adult and dad but at the same time I don’t know if that will ruin my relationship with my kid and my girlfriend who I want merry but thank you for the response and the video definitely helped me understand things a lot better 🙏🏾
Your heart is in the right place brother. Relationships take a tremendous amount of work and your partner is gonna have to feel supported, secure and protected when your away. Having family/church/community will help her while she’s without you. Definitely let her speak into your decision making process.
It’ll take work but all relationships due. Or else they rip apart due to the constant pulling forces of opposing human egos. Humility and teamwork will be key
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer yeah that’s very true and ultimately it’ll be mainly her opinion on me going when I make my final decision about joining and by that time my kid will be 8 months old so hopefully everything will go well and I hope if I do join it’ll be a good decision but thank you again for time🙏🏾
Let me know what else U want me to post on. Btw If u get married you’ll collect housing pay that she can use even while your in training. Depending on what city your from theyll base the monthly allowance on that. Google your “BAH calculator”
I always wondered what happened to the “good guy” meme.
I don't have kids and neither was I in the military so this might not be the most reliable opinion, but I wouldn't join the military after becoming a parent, or at least I wouldn't join full time unless I was in a situation where I was either required or it was the best/only option
How about family living in base?
Base housing varies. I can upload some shots of the neighborhood i lived in
I am a single mother of 1 currently waiting to ship out for Air Force active duty. I already had established a family care plan. BUT I WANT TO KNOW Can my child live with me once I get to my duty station?
My understanding is once you get orders cut for the duty station you will be heading to that is when your family can start their move. Some are able to sign leases remotely without ever visiting first while others, depending on the location have their family members travel out to look at various houses and apartments to figure out which one to sign a lease for so it kind of depends.
How did you do your family care plan if you don’t mind me asking? I’m trying to enlist into the army as a single mom.
I’m 33 and With two children age 3 and 9 years old and married I’m heading to military soon !
Keep me updated. I'm 30 with a 10 yr old, 2, yr old, and a 1 yr old.
Did you join
I went to BCT at 39
i am 19 and my girlfriend is about 2 months pregnant. thinking about joining the air force. any advice for me?
Does that mean you’ll be out of training by the time she has the baby? I know some folks in OCS were able to be released to see their kids being born but others were not.
I have 2 kids and one on the way, I have been working on joining the Air Force for the last year. Does the third unborn child disqualify me?
I can’t see why but id ask the recruiter. Not sure how they verify provision for children upon your being shipped out for training
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer thanks for the response!
You got it. Let me know what other questions you might have
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer will do, appreciate it!!
@@RobOutdoors623did you end up joining the Air Force I’m in the same boat got twins and one on the way
hey im trying to join the military. i have 2 kids but im not with the kids mom. if i go active i have to give up custody. what if i go for the reserves indtead?
I talked to a guy in the same boat. Not sure about all the legal issues there and the family law regarding federal jobs. Definitely something recruiters can help guide you through. I hope you get the answer or direction you need
Dont give up custody you will automatically disqualified. You need a family care plan.
Thx for adding that info to help
@@xd3stiny773 so question I’m in the same boat have 3 kids. Just to confirm your answer for his question for myself as well😊so 3 kids disqualifies anyone who has 3 kids or giving up custody does?
Let’s say u have a kid but are not married can you still join the navy?
Depends on custody arrangements I think. I knew a guy who couldn’t join because he had full custody of his daughter. A recruiter will def know the regulations on this
I’ve been meaning to join since last year but I’m afraid of leaving a job that pays $20 an hour with 50 hours a week for a career in the Army that I’ve always wanted and not knowing if financially my wife and I and our two kids are going to be good or taken care of for that matter. Any thoughts on that?
That’s a hard one what’s your job?
Go to the national guard part time and work at you current job.
I'm married and we have a preschooler, and I'm leaving for BMT next month. How do you explain to a 5 year old that you're leaving for 3 months to join the USAF and the whole idea of joining the military?
Any resources, tips, etc?
I think that any topic can be explained to children if you’re using age appropriate language. I’m a single mom and my daughter was 3 when I joined. I explained to her that I would be starting a new job and going to “military school” to help better take care of her. I let her know that, unfortunately, while I was away, I wouldn’t be able to call her on the phone much, but that I would send her letters that she could read with her grandmother. When I got to AIT, we FaceTimed after class and on the weekends. Even at that age, they’re more resilient than we sometimes give them credit for. Best of luck to you in your journey!
@@3Dani. this is really helpful.
How about the idea of joining the military, did she ask questions and how did you talk to her about those concepts. My son is 5 and his idea of military are his toy soldiers. Dada won’t be a solidier but rather an Airman with a different job that doesn’t involve being in the front lines. Curious how you navigate these topics and conversation?
Appreciate your response!
❤️brilliant
@@mjmldz I was a public school teacher before I joined, so I just explained to her that I “won’t be teaching the big kids anymore. My new job is working on computers to keep people safe, but since I don’t know how to do it yet, the Army has to teach me.” I showed her a map so that she could see where we lived at the time, where my mom lived, and where Ft. Jackson and Ft. Huachuca are. We had to have conversations about there being a time difference between VA and AZ as well so that she knew that when I was getting out of school, it was almost her bedtime. Now, she’s 6 and she knows that “military people” wear a uniform similar to mine and that the Army told me where they needed us to get a new house so that I can fix all the computers. She needs reminders about some things sometimes, but generally, she understands now. I’m very transparent with her and let her ask as many questions as she needs to.
@@3Dani. wow. Amazing. I love the map idea. I think I’m going to steal that! And yeah, makes a lot of sense what you’re explaining here. Thank you for this insight. I leave for USAF BMT in 3 weeks!
My husband will leave for basic training I will stay alone with my 2 kids no family in this country
You should definitely post your advice because you’re gonna have a lot of wisdom that people want to hear
This is us rn. 3 kids and I’ll be alone if hubby leaves, it’s nerve racking. We have a 12 , 10 & 5 year old
@@tatiandjossy you can do it. its almost a year that my husband is in the military and i am trying my best. Good luck :)
@@SixFigureCouchSurfer i know , i might do a video:) its being almost a year
Bruh talk about BAH as a single parent or something.