He is going to say this, over the years Funeral Directors have made a lot of money with their charges and also taking a commission and all the other services offered from an FD.
It comes down to being educated, having full knowledge of as loved one’s wishes, as well as making pre arrangements if possible. Unfortunately, individuals may save financially. But live with regrets of their decisions. It’s a one time situation and needs to correct.
good to see this as an termilly ill young man from Caerphilly im thinking maybe direct cremation option worried tho as very tall guy at 7ft 3 tall but slim build ?
I suppose a memorial service can take place after this has happened, if that’s someone’s wish or some small ceremony, once ashes are returned, as someone I know has done with there fathers ashes. Personally when it’s my time, as a Catholic, I want a requiem mass & burial. I have no wish to put in the oven. I realise about following someone wishes I just find a direct cremation morbid & those left behind, may find some comfort in the planning of a funeral as the final send off. Is this all money based, I wonder!
As a son who has lost his mum 2 weeks ago, all I ask is if you are considering this - please, think of your family. My mum didn't have a big family, her wishes were for a simple direct cremation. While she was alive I thought to myself "that's a bit shit, it'll be weird, I'd rather you didn't but if it's what you want - okay" Now that she's gone, even after seeing her body, knowing full well she's not coming back, it didn't make it set in any more. I personally hate funerals, everything about them and I doubt I'd even get half way through the eulogy before showing way more emotions than I'd ever show in public. That being said, I'm sure a funeral is part of the grieving process and while it continues long after the process, that moment of the curtains closing at the very least is almost the end of a chapter. I have no doubt that the lack of a funeral is going to prolong the grieving process. You may think that no fuss is the way to go. Ultimately whoever you are, there will be a fuss and long after you're gone, people will still be mourning your loss, don't deprive them of an opportunity to make that easier or to gain some sort of closure, ending one chapter and beginning another. Not only am I losing out on that, I've spent the last 2 weeks explaining to other people just as confused as I am as to why there won't be a funeral. While I'm going by her wishes, it almost feels like a judgement on me, that I'm not arranging the send off that my mum deserves, although maybe that's just me feeling guilt on myself for not trying to change it. I've paid the extra for a wooden coffin instead of a cardboard one and arranged a proper urn instead of a cardboard box, but that was virtually all the freedom I had in trying to give her what she wanted vs what she deserved. Even once she comes back to us in that proper urn in a few weeks time, it's not going to make the process any further forward. Just please, think of the impact on those left behind, I understand a funeral in itself will have nearly double the financial impact at least, but I'd argue that the mental impact is far worse.
We are so sorry for the recent loss of your mum and thank you for taking the time to comment. As funeral directors, we whole heartedly agree with your comments. Too often we see those left behind going through these emotions. Loosing someone close is the lowest part of your life and we know that how you say goodbye to them can have a huge impact on the life of those left behind. We offer non-attended cremation, and burial, as part of our range of services because it’s what some people want and also because we see the reality of what some of the cremation company practices are. We use the same type of coffin on all our services because we feel that everyone deserves this and we think you’ve done the best that you could for your mum within respecting her wishes. Please focus on your good memories of your mum and perhaps arrange a small get-together with those who would have wanted to attend a funeral to say good-bye to her. That part of the grief process is extremely important, as nearly all cultures world-wide know. We appreciate that you’re probably not in our local area but if we can help in anyway please contact us. With sincere condolences and best wishes from Dean & The CFS Team
This is the trouble with funeral business they've had it too good for so long. I have a plan with Pure Cremation no fuss no bother and that suits me just fine.
That’s good. Just ask who they’ll use if you pass away at home. most funeral directors offer a no fuss direct cremation and you keep employment local too
My mother wants a direct cremation, and I respect her wishes, but there will be no closure for those she leaves behind. We need to plan for this - visit a special place together and mark her passing.
Talk through her wishes. We often arrange a burial or scattering of ashes after a non-attended cremation giving people somewhere to go. The funeral ceremony is only one component of the grieving process and the laying to rest of a deceased persons body. There are many options to suit individual wishes.
I agree Helen. Seeing the casket is part of the grieving process. That is also why some had open caskets so that the truth of death is there. It is an important part of the closure to be part of the interment of the body of scattering of the ashes. Otherwise it feels as though the person has broken off or disappeared and I think this leads to trauma in the long term. The people who want this are not considering the grieving loved ones. Funerals are not for the dead but the living.
I've just lost mine 2 weeks ago and she wanted a direct cremation, I've gone by her wishes but... Yeah the long term impact on me is going to be greater than I never imagined and that's from someone who thought he had planned for it.
Think long and hard about direct cremation because people who have had this service are sorry.! I myself would not have one if you have family and friends.! One thing I have 48 years experience in the trade I know what I am talking about .
I agree. There is no closure as part of the grieving process. I am sure many people will regret this as it feels very dehumanising and trivialises death and therefore life. Even mass murder victims or holocaust victims in mass graves had memorials. What people are saying is they dont want their families to have any closure. It is very cruel and dehumanising.
@@lastthingsministry I totally agree my brother had one it's like he never existed. He had a lot of friends and his crack pot wife just looked at the money. ☹️
Or....a disgruntled funeral directors opinion of a service pinching their clients and lucrative income. People aren't thick they know what they can get from both and if they cut out the middle man deal with it.
Sorry if you think we’re disgruntled, we aren’t. We just think it’s important that people research everything and talk with their loved ones. A direct cremation still requires certain funeral director services.many direct cremation s are not covered by the various codes of conduct that prevent things happening such as being reported on TV news at the moment. All we want is people to research, discuss and then make an informed decision. We offer a range of services to suit people’s needs and keep the money local supporting local businesses and jobs.
@@cfsthecaringfuneralservice7348 Given that you have to seek out a direct cremation service and such services explain what you get and what you don't, I think people are generally content with such a service. My aunt has had a direct cremation and it's what she wanted and we were able to fulfil her wishes without the expense of a funeral director. I think generally you're being rather biased about this new innovation of direct cremation.
Funeral Directors are like con men. They know all the right things to say to extract your money from you - but when you see the "undercover" documentaries of what some of these businesses actually do it's disgusting and totally profit driven - often taking advantage of grieving relatives. 😡
He is going to say this, over the years Funeral Directors have made a lot of money with their charges and also taking a commission and all the other services offered from an FD.
It comes down to being educated, having full knowledge of as loved one’s wishes, as well as making pre arrangements if possible.
Unfortunately, individuals may save financially.
But live with regrets of their decisions.
It’s a one time situation and needs to correct.
Thank you for this information, was talking to my mum about this the other day, i just want to be pain free and a direct cremation is what i want.
good to see this as an termilly ill young man from Caerphilly im thinking maybe direct cremation option worried tho as very tall guy at 7ft 3 tall but slim build ?
I suppose a memorial service can take place after this has happened, if that’s someone’s wish or some small ceremony, once ashes are returned, as someone I know has done with there fathers ashes. Personally when it’s my time, as a Catholic, I want a requiem mass & burial. I have no wish to put in the oven. I realise about following someone wishes I just find a direct cremation morbid & those left behind, may find some comfort in the planning of a funeral as the final send off. Is this all money based, I wonder!
As a son who has lost his mum 2 weeks ago, all I ask is if you are considering this - please, think of your family. My mum didn't have a big family, her wishes were for a simple direct cremation. While she was alive I thought to myself "that's a bit shit, it'll be weird, I'd rather you didn't but if it's what you want - okay"
Now that she's gone, even after seeing her body, knowing full well she's not coming back, it didn't make it set in any more. I personally hate funerals, everything about them and I doubt I'd even get half way through the eulogy before showing way more emotions than I'd ever show in public. That being said, I'm sure a funeral is part of the grieving process and while it continues long after the process, that moment of the curtains closing at the very least is almost the end of a chapter. I have no doubt that the lack of a funeral is going to prolong the grieving process.
You may think that no fuss is the way to go. Ultimately whoever you are, there will be a fuss and long after you're gone, people will still be mourning your loss, don't deprive them of an opportunity to make that easier or to gain some sort of closure, ending one chapter and beginning another. Not only am I losing out on that, I've spent the last 2 weeks explaining to other people just as confused as I am as to why there won't be a funeral. While I'm going by her wishes, it almost feels like a judgement on me, that I'm not arranging the send off that my mum deserves, although maybe that's just me feeling guilt on myself for not trying to change it. I've paid the extra for a wooden coffin instead of a cardboard one and arranged a proper urn instead of a cardboard box, but that was virtually all the freedom I had in trying to give her what she wanted vs what she deserved. Even once she comes back to us in that proper urn in a few weeks time, it's not going to make the process any further forward.
Just please, think of the impact on those left behind, I understand a funeral in itself will have nearly double the financial impact at least, but I'd argue that the mental impact is far worse.
We are so sorry for the recent loss of your mum and thank you for taking the time to comment.
As funeral directors, we whole heartedly agree with your comments. Too often we see those left behind going through these emotions. Loosing someone close is the lowest part of your life and we know that how you say goodbye to them can have a huge impact on the life of those left behind.
We offer non-attended cremation, and burial, as part of our range of services because it’s what some people want and also because we see the reality of what some of the cremation company practices are.
We use the same type of coffin on all our services because we feel that everyone deserves this and we think you’ve done the best that you could for your mum within respecting her wishes.
Please focus on your good memories of your mum and perhaps arrange a small get-together with those who would have wanted to attend a funeral to say good-bye to her. That part of the grief process is extremely important, as nearly all cultures world-wide know.
We appreciate that you’re probably not in our local area but if we can help in anyway please contact us.
With sincere condolences and best wishes from Dean & The CFS Team
This is the trouble with funeral business they've had it too good for so long. I have a plan with Pure Cremation no fuss no bother and that suits me just fine.
That’s good. Just ask who they’ll use if you pass away at home. most funeral directors offer a no fuss direct cremation and you keep employment local too
My mother wants a direct cremation, and I respect her wishes, but there will be no closure for those she leaves behind. We need to plan for this - visit a special place together and mark her passing.
Talk through her wishes. We often arrange a burial or scattering of ashes after a non-attended cremation giving people somewhere to go. The funeral ceremony is only one component of the grieving process and the laying to rest of a deceased persons body. There are many options to suit individual wishes.
I agree Helen. Seeing the casket is part of the grieving process. That is also why some had open caskets so that the truth of death is there. It is an important part of the closure to be part of the interment of the body of scattering of the ashes. Otherwise it feels as though the person has broken off or disappeared and I think this leads to trauma in the long term. The people who want this are not considering the grieving loved ones. Funerals are not for the dead but the living.
I've just lost mine 2 weeks ago and she wanted a direct cremation, I've gone by her wishes but... Yeah the long term impact on me is going to be greater than I never imagined and that's from someone who thought he had planned for it.
My uncle passed away last week. He is having a direct cremation. His sons will scatter his ashes.
Think long and hard about direct cremation because people who have had this service are sorry.!
I myself would not have one if you have family and friends.!
One thing I have 48 years experience in the trade I know what I am talking about .
I agree. There is no closure as part of the grieving process. I am sure many people will regret this as it feels very dehumanising and trivialises death and therefore life. Even mass murder victims or holocaust victims in mass graves had memorials. What people are saying is they dont want their families to have any closure. It is very cruel and dehumanising.
@@lastthingsministry I totally agree my brother had one it's like he never existed. He had a lot of friends and his crack pot wife just looked at the money. ☹️
Or....a disgruntled funeral directors opinion of a service pinching their clients and lucrative income. People aren't thick they know what they can get from both and if they cut out the middle man deal with it.
Sorry if you think we’re disgruntled, we aren’t. We just think it’s important that people research everything and talk with their loved ones. A direct cremation still requires certain funeral director services.many direct cremation s are not covered by the various codes of conduct that prevent things happening such as being reported on TV news at the moment. All we want is people to research, discuss and then make an informed decision. We offer a range of services to suit people’s needs and keep the money local supporting local businesses and jobs.
@@cfsthecaringfuneralservice7348 Given that you have to seek out a direct cremation service and such services explain what you get and what you don't, I think people are generally content with such a service. My aunt has had a direct cremation and it's what she wanted and we were able to fulfil her wishes without the expense of a funeral director. I think generally you're being rather biased about this new innovation of direct cremation.
Funeral Directors are like con men. They know all the right things to say to extract your money from you - but when you see the "undercover" documentaries of what some of these businesses actually do it's disgusting and totally profit driven - often taking advantage of grieving relatives. 😡