I have 10 years with my husband and I’m still going through it. I have talked to his ex multiple times to let her know that she is hurting her daughter not me. My husband loves his daughter and he’s on a full month of not seeing her because his ex is poisoning my step daughters mind. It’s sad because I grew up without a father and I would have killed to have a dad like the one my husband has become. A dad who cares.
We're not all bad fathers or did our exes wrong, some women think the grass is greener on the other side and when she finds out it's not they wanna be jealous because he found happiness in another woman.
Exactly, that bitter train of thoight is detrimental to the children. Not the man or new woman in his life. Their so fueled by anger and hurt, they don't realize it. But in a lot of cases they just don't care. It's very sad.
This is my issue right now she cheated on him while she was pregnant. I’m now I’m with him and married to him she upset because she tried to destroy his life and I came to shut that down all the way
I was involved with a woman and I didn't know she had kids. When she decided to tell me she said we are a package deal. I said I see the package but where's the deal. That was the last time I ever saw her.I told her that if I don't have authority then I don't accept accountability
Honestly this brought tears too my eyes. My kids mother needs too hear this message. There are so many women that need too hear this. Stop targeting the man because y'all didn't work out. Move on and live your life. The man has a responsibility too be a father too his kids. He has no obligation too you any longer at all.
When a man moves on, its not about the child's mother being damaged goods. If the two of you aren't good together, it's not healthy for either of you to be together. Just because y'all have children together does not mean y'all have to be together. If it didn't work, it didn't work. Everyone deserves to be happy. Both parties involved, together or not.
@@jessicab331 Unfortunately as a single man without children you are damaged goods in my perspective. You gave your womb up to another man already. Your womb is no longer what it was before you birth any child. Single men without children seek single women without children first then we step down to single mothers. Single mothers need to understand that it’s never personal just how business is in the dating world. Women with children are too much of a hassle to deal with because being a step parent is a thankless job to raise another man’s legacy
Pinky There should be a support group for baby mamas step parents bio parents b/c it's all about the babies caught in the middle of these adult situations
Is your husband trying to handle it or just being a punk? Why even date a man that doesn't handle his business like a man? He's either in her ear or her pussy most likely.Check him about checking her.
Everyday I thank my mom she raised me the way she did. She said "Let a man commit to you first before having a baby, let him make you his wife because that's not even guaranteed at times." These women think that the baby is a sub for a marriage or relationship. Sorry, the gift of life is so precious. You can give that to an honorable man. And with his consent. A lot of baby mamas do too much!
My question is why would a woman even put herself through that ? Drama drama drama...geez.. just date a guy with no kids damn. That juice ain't worth the squeeze
grace angulo yes thats what im wondering. They gettin with these people and committing like they owe them and their child something. Live your life WITHOUT them.
marilyn l seriously! Maybe folks options are limited you know, but it's still better to be by your self and get money and have your freedom. You didn't create it so why put yourself in a hard place for no "good" reason...smh. why should someone benefit from you who have no strings attached to you, no resources that you owe anyone accept to yourself..why
AMEN to this video. A real mother loves her children more than she hates or dislikes her ex. It's not about you, it's about the children because they didn't ask to born.
@@ebakindeji5941 I have no idea. They are stupid and get mad at the man for not staying. A baby don't make a man stay. Their dumb asses just get caught with a baby alone. The men move on to marry other women.
I've learned as Ive grown the reason parents want us gone at 18 is the fact the benefits are cut off. I honestly think its done subconcoiusly, the child becomes a burden once they don't bring in the funds anymore. Sad programming.
Try having a bitter baby daddy. Who’s remarried twice and tried having more kids. It’s a control thing. He has no control over my wife anymore and can’t stand it. 😂
Mine uses my son as a tool for money. I work so hard... I give her everything, yet she still takes advantage. I'm supposed to have my son every weekend, I travel away from home for work, usually home on weekends, behind on my rent because I sent her $280 this week, left myself with $40 to live off of until next payday, know what she did? Blocked me because her momma got in touch with me to ask if I needed help with his school supplies, looked at it as a gift from the good Lord, but instead, she told me to not contact her family, or she'll block me ... Well she did, haven't seen my son in two weeks. Haven't been able to contact her in a week. I call my son every day. What do you think she says to my son when he asks, "why hasn't daddy called?" Do you think she says, "because I blocked him for talking to your grandma because she offered to pay for your school supplies"? No. She's telling him the opposite of what is true. That daddy just was looking out... Sorry as hell. But I pray, because I love my son.
Christopher Hill see to hear your story this really burns me inside. Got me right because men who are doing right by their kids financially do not get a break. You were basically struggling trying to help take care of your child and yet you are the bad guy. It hurts my heart!!!!!!! I hate you were having to endure that! I really hope things have shaped up for you and your have been able to see your son!
You know what, I am a childless woman and i met years ago a man with two kids and he was passing through a hard time with all the drama with his ex and probably forever as the kids are females and will grown just like the mother, so I was not secure be into that relationship as I was thinking how the future would be like with two girls teenagers and acting against me, but thank God not only these thoughts were coming in my mind but also I realized he was a real asshole , so he would do same mistakes with me as he has been married 3 times so today I don't blame that much the exe's because you don't know exactly what happened between them, you will only get the conclusion once he ended up showing his real behavior to you , it just takes some time to you realize he is not worth to be with, of course at the beginning he will come out as a victim, be gentle to you etc etc but later that guy will change to his real persona. So, today I want a childless man like me and girls don't believe in everything what that single dad says if he ended up his life handling a baby mama drama he probably deserved that, his past are full of bad attitudes towards a women. Don't be a saver in a man's life , he is not that innocent and to be honest , meanwhile you get mad with his ex, he could be having sex with her on your back, they will forever be in contact and don't be stupid to believe that it's all about their kids when in reality not most of the time. Save your ass and run !
I’m currently dealing with this! My significant other child’s mother is going above and beyond to disrespect me and all sorts of other things and I’m doing my best to stay focused because I know it’s an distraction
No package deals for me at all, im NOT dealing with it. No step parenting ever, nor accepting/taking care of whats not mine. Not sorry either. Throw the whole situation away. 🚮 💁#FOH #NOTABLENDER #ITSNOTNATURAL #TOOMUCHBS
@@Stephanie-uz5ft actually alot of women are not entertaining step parenting roles. Who really in their right mind wants to deal with a mess like that. That old saying that love is not enough is really the truth.
I know what it’s like to have a man seem to treat the next woman like gold and that hurts. To be wise and mature to say thank you God for making him a good man is a true test of your character! Thanks for sharing :)
I happen to be 45 years old, and I foreseen the possibility of baby mama drama when I was 14. I have remained single(never married), and I have ZERO children. To this day, I do not feel sorry for either men or women whom engage in rampant premarital sexual relations, but I do feel sorry for the children born as the result of this type of behavior. Children didn't ask to be born to 2 idiots whom can no longer stand the sight of each other, and when either parent cannot get along with each other in the presence of their child(ren) regardless of reason, then these children would be better adults if they were not in either parent's custody. They would be better children if raised in a boarding school paid by taxpayers. At least with no more drama in their lives, these children could focus on making themselves better than their parents could ever be. But, we must face the fact that we do not live in a perfect world, nor do we live CURRENTLY in a police state. If we ever do find ourselves in either world, hopefully the children will never know what life is like with 2 idiots as parents.
My mom was in a relationship with her boyfriend she was breaking up with. She met my dad and somewhere in between she was raped at gunpoint. I could have been three men's daughter, but my dad married her and divorced her when I was 5. Shit happens but I wouldn't want anyone feeling sorry about me being here. I grew up on welfare because my mom became sick. Life was quite tough but it made me tougher and I now am a truck driver a hard worker and rather successful and I am greatful for my parents doing the deed and giving me an opportunity in life. Not engaging in premarital sex will not secure you some kind of exclusivity with your partner. Not sure what pretentious rock you seem to live under. If being single and not having a family offspring or legacy to pass on then that is absolutely your choice ☺️ I'm not going to miss out on the bliss and blessing of motherhood just because it doesn't fit some hallmark stereotype 😆
This is exactly what I'm going through. My mans ex using the child as a weapon and causing so much stress on our relationship. Its so sad because I'm not sure I can keep going with this. She is relentless..even though I'm great to their child and he tells her he loves me because I'm always nice to him she still tries to break us up.
Just another reason not to date single moms if they do this to their ex they will do it to you if you have a child with them so the second you figure something out like this is going on hit the road and never look back.
Ryan X Some men stay and aid in it. Telling the baby daddy that he ain’t shit and telling the fiancé that she’s the one causing issues, calling her names, etc. Don’t care that the woman their with is the reason as to why nobody can get along.
And this is exactly why so many women are “bitter”... look at what y’all say about single mother yet baby daddies get praised and have women beating down the door!
Amen!! I cannot agree more! This is what I'm dealing with now with a bitter baby momma! She hates my guts because I'm pregnant with a new child. I've stressed that the relationship with his daughter will not change and she is being nothing but difficult, and court is possibly in our future. She threatens it about every 2 weeks. Thank you so much! ❤
My Baby momma does everything in her power to try and control me and punish me and wont listen to reason. I TRY and work with her on raising my daughter but she is hell bent on ruining my life any chance she can get.. I feel so helpless...
My husband knows exactly how you feel when it comes to his daughter from a previous relationship. You are not alone and my heart goes out to all the good men out there who are trying to be great Fathers.
I will never. Be with a man especially when I know another woman put in work in him and he didn’t treat her right…you won’t find me building an empire of a hard working woman’s tears..if it happened to her it can happen to me
I wish all the baby mama's would watch this, but if she's anything like my situation... she won't hear a word you said, because you're not talking to her smh Your video is point on.
People need keep the comments pertain to the video. The sister is critiquing black women who alienate children from their father, when the man MOVES ON. Keep it relevant to the point. There are a lot of videos that bash black men, so go on over to Derrick Jackson's channel.
Pray for the child. Your husband's full of bull if he lets you get his crap. He won't set her straight because he's still messing with her or something
I love u i love u I love u.... you have touched every note and I do mean every note I’ve tried to be in my 2 sons life but the mother omg I can’t but I’m happy to know that there are sisters out there like yourself to preach these words.... thank you so much
The sad truth is that the man is usually still sleeping with the mom. If you don't like what the baby momma is doing, go to court!!!!! It's really that simple.
@@maryscheitler2488 Actually it really isn't not only do most courts rule in favor of the women, but you also need to provide hard evidence against her.
@@maryscheitler2488 well , he has to prove the woman is bad,prove why he is a better choice and also prove to the court why their decision is wrong. A lot of Fathers prove all that and still get 50percent.
@@maryscheitler2488 one guy, was able to prove to the judge that his child'mother intentionally gives him the wrong medication plus a Jailbird lives in the woman's house, he still got ignored
Thank you thank you thank you!!! I’ve been dealing with my boyfriends ex for 5 years and it has been terrible. He’s an AMAZING father who just wants to be happy. Thank you for your words and support!!!!
I'm 20 years old and I'm going thru this shit right now and it ain't easy... Word of advise to the young 'dont ever board this boat'...who feels it knows it...I dont think anyone has a baby mama drama like the one im dealing with.
Like paying 630 something dollars a month for child support only for my bm to drop my daughter off at her other baby daddy house n stead of finding a baby sitter while I'm at work 🤷🏾♂️
Chris Rock Sounds like spite. The other BD probably still smashes..But still wants you, but because your not entertaining her she's using the only leverage she has... Your Child.
Alison Hall The problem is, the child should be going to see their father and not someone who isn’t biologically their father. $630 is plenty of money for the child’s necessities. You can get free childcare if you’re on medicaid and also try to get family or friends to watch them, sure they wouldn’t mind.
@mika joy I don't have to be in a single moms shoes to know. I was raised by a single mother ALL my life and the majority of the women in my family are single mothers but what they taught me was valuable and live it out by putting their children's relationship with their father first! All the wonton my family are friends with their exes new wives or girlfriends. My grandfathers wife was friends with my grandmother and became a customer of grandmother's and spent a lot of money with my grandmother. So no I have been a single mother but the examples that I have had would allow me to be an excellent single mother and baby mama! Young women can learn something today.
I feel like I need help with a situation So my boyfriend has a kid and he tells me that the girl he was sleeping with at one one ask him for a child because she wanted a child with a white man and she just can't have a kid with a black guy. She wanted to be a single mother which to me it just sound absolutely ridiculous. Now she decided that she also wants him and that I can't be around her kid. I really don't mind if she doesn't want me around her kid because she is looking out for her kid. But now she is driving him crazy and wants to move away with me to another country so nothing follows him. I'm a little torn because he didn't want a kid with her but he decided it was ok to do her a favor. But I still consider that he should man up and help support and race that kid because it's still his no matter what. She lives in an bad area so he wants to take away the kid just to give it to his mom and I strongly object to that. I want to break up because of this but do love him.
Adri C Hello Adri, Thank you for sharing your story. This sounds like a very difficult and emotional situation. Especially if he felt like he was helping her but never In the mind frame to raise a child. The does need both parents whether they are a couple or not. As you have already acknowledged the child should be considered when moving away. I know your boyfriend is just running from the situation but it still does not change it. The child would still suffer because he is taking the child away from their mom and being given to someone else to raise even though it's the grandmother. So the child will have resentment because they. Was taken away from their mother and still missing out on relationship with their father. And as for the child not being able to be around you...well that is a 'Control' move. She is trying to control your relationship with the child and your relationship with your boyfriend and his child. Her ultimate goal is to make sure all 'Three' of you do not become the family unit that she actually desires have with him. So see the three of you together reminds her of what she could have had but she does not so she wants to make sure he does not have it either. So it's not that she does not know you or that she is being cautious she does not want her child getting attached to another woman that is connected to her child's father.
I can not related to the angry baby mama.My husband have a daughter before me, Me and his daughter are 9 years apart she grown now with 3 children of her own and I been with him for 21 years and have 3 children with him 2 adults and a 3 year old. I totally agree with you. What people need to realize everybody is not meant to be together even if they do have a child.You have to prepared your mind what if we break up and we have children.I believe conversation like this have came up and we tend to ignore the warnings signs until it's to late and we become bitter knowing we did them wrong also.Never get comfortable in a relationship always prepared your mind what if He/She decided to move on.You don't own anyone and nobody owes you an explanation for leaving.If my husband decided to leave me he owes me nothing just take care your child anything else is irrelevant as long as the child is not abuse and well taken care of is all that matter.
This is litrally happening to me.... I pay the maximum anount of child support 563 a month, and im not even complaining about that at all because its just as much as my responsibility to take care of my daughter as much as her mother but her mother STILL KEEPS HER AWAY FROM ME! whats worse is she will let me talk to her on the phone for like a month straight and then abruptly cut me off like a bat shit crazy person for absolutly zero reason at all. So then im left with the torment of my 4 year old daughter telling her I make her happy when i call her but i cant even reach her because her mom flat out cuts me off from her...like if i could i swear to God i would litrally post the facebook messages between me and my daughters mother just to verify what im saying.... this shit truly truly hurts like nothing has ever hurt before, but I greatly apprecaite black queens such as yourself taking the time out to make this video. God bless you sister i needed this....
The priorities are simple God, Spouse, then Children (be it step kids or otherwise). I believe both parties share equal responsibility for the child and their wellbeing. I totally agree adults should be able to put their feelings aside for the sake of the child. This is a child, and it takes a village whether both parents are in the home or not to raise him or her. It's already hard as it is in the world we live in adding drama to an already open wound doesn't help anybody. As a parent, it is beneficial to have a conversation (the child's mother, the father and the new spouse) to set standards, morals, values, support for the child so that their environment is stable and consistent. Granted all situations are different, but let's not confuse the past with the present. Using your child as a weapon is no way to get the closure or vengeance one seeks (give that burden to Jesus). I appreciate this point of view and hope young women and men take heed to the truth and being spoken here.
@Maya H Well, you're presuming it was the only thing he picked up. If someone erred by saying the sun goes round the earth, most would be prompted to correct it too. I don't see how that is petty. I think you're the one reading malice into it. Can't help you with that, I'm afraid.
Tbh, if the new woman was the mistress while you were in a relationship with the father I do think the mother has every right to say she doesn't want her kids around the mistress. Otherwise, I completely agree.
Amen! I couldn't have said it any better myself. I am black but was born into a two parent home. My Moms friends daughter got knocked up at 16. At 26 she has four children with 4 different baby daddies. She plays her kids like pawns to punish her baby daddies. I am 25 and do not have kids. I dated a man who had one child with a crazy baby mama who made it a point to make my lives miserable. She played her son as a pawn forbidding him to see there son because she was so damm jealous and even keyed her exes care. She egged my house and sent me harassing emails so I calles it quits. Yes there are a few good but its hard to find them..
It really is. My bf and I just had a baby...he has 2 kids with 2 other women, the youngest born 5 months earlier than our daughter. Both of them use their kids as pawns...it’s so emotionally stressful 😔they don’t know about our daughter. He hides her...it hurts me so much. She’s my first baby and this is his 3rd...I be feeling like he hides her cause he’s embarrassed but he says he hasn’t mentioned her cause his ex will not let him see their baby....I’m so stupid. But these are the cards god gave me
I wish more baby mommas thought this way. If I ever have a child with a man who ends leaving me or vice versa I know in my heart that the love I have for my child is enough to keep the relationship as cordial as possible and if he wants to be a father I would let him. And I would never be disrespectful and bitter towards his new woman because I've been on the receiving end of that situation. The kid should never be a toy that you decide when and how to take away from the father just because you're scorned that he left you.
Thank you for saying this. My wife found out her mother lied to her about her father didn't love her, when really, she wouldn't allow him to see his children because he didn't want to be with the mother.
@@shannaiaabellano1338 I have never gone through this and I'm too smart to go through it.Sorry you like to deal with clowns and their issues then blast your business online.
This was spot on! I'm in a relationship with someone who's estranged wife (he's going through a divorce) has been acting up bc we are happy and don't want drama. Thank you for this video🙌🏾
Rightfully so, going to divorce court & signing some papers doesn't break the marriage covenant. Society doesn't realize that marriage is permanent, it isn't like dating. The reality is they will always be married because they are one flesh for life. Get out of this adultery & find a man who has never been married before.
this indeed had me in tears because my ex refuses me to see my son trying to get visitation its sad she told my son he better off without me this was a strong message
I have seen both men and women abuse their spouses kids...I have a friend who didn’t want his daughter around his baby mama’s boyfriend because he got bad vibes from the dude...we all thought he was tripping because the two of them still dealt with each other on a sexual level and her new relationship was getting in the way of that....fast forward 3months the 2 year old baby is in the hospital with the clap...when they tested every male that had access to her, the boyfriend was the only one to test positive
And if he meets a woman that's WILLING to be apart of y'all's kids lives, don't knock that!!!!! just because you make/or help make a child don't mean you're a parent!!!!! And it takes a STAND UP man/woman to MAKE THE DECISION to love a child that isn't biologically theirs.
Good point .. However i seriously think behaviors are reinforced not on an individual bases but from a stand point of community. Our society through ( Music, Hollywood and Social media ) normalised ungodly living. We are deprived from our true heritage and in its place, Hip hop. Where every women wants to be a Kardashian and every man wants to be 50 cent. Not to mention the effect feminism has played in shifting the family dynamics. What we see today is the result of a world that has denied the laws of GOD.
Go to the courts demand a paternity test when you prove it's your child you Will then have rights but then child support will also come into effect but if that's your child that's what you want to do anyway.
Amen thank you for this video. My baby mother always starting with my wife n I'd have another kid, but once I got married and had another 👶 all hell broke loose. Baby mother still in love and all she wanna do is tried taking my son away from me but I am a wonderful dad to my kids.
Funny thing is I told her to go open up a bank account so I can make weekly deposits she told me she didn't have $5 to do it I told her when I put the $100 in there every week you can get the $5 she still had excuses
Been there... now a grandparent and hurt grandma moma drama syndrome. has started.. I taught it was over after paying off child support.. round 2. Yeah she taught me something... how crazy look. Big sista you are speaking the truth.. it a hard do for your sista... this hate is a root cause of the destruction of our families. We are not breeding children..not establishing strong values in families. It's a sad situation..
Don't date a man with children unless both parents have set boundaries of co-parenting . ..it's too much of a headache on the new relationship.
So true
But dudes get shamed when they don’t wanna deal with women with kids 🙄🙄 ok...
Facts
I have 10 years with my husband and I’m still going through it. I have talked to his ex multiple times to let her know that she is hurting her daughter not me. My husband loves his daughter and he’s on a full month of not seeing her because his ex is poisoning my step daughters mind. It’s sad because I grew up without a father and I would have killed to have a dad like the one my husband has become. A dad who cares.
The double standard...smdh
We're not all bad fathers or did our exes wrong, some women think the grass is greener on the other side and when she finds out it's not they wanna be jealous because he found happiness in another woman.
Super big facts, Some women dont know the meaning of loyalty at all
Exactly, that bitter train of thoight is detrimental to the children. Not the man or new woman in his life. Their so fueled by anger and hurt, they don't realize it. But in a lot of cases they just don't care. It's very sad.
This is my issue right now she cheated on him while she was pregnant. I’m now I’m with him and married to him she upset because she tried to destroy his life and I came to shut that down all the way
Yup my husband ex has a baby by another man after theirs but came to our home to fight me I've never met her before then like real life delusional
I was involved with a woman and I didn't know she had kids. When she decided to tell me she said we are a package deal. I said I see the package but where's the deal. That was the last time I ever saw her.I told her that if I don't have authority then I don't accept accountability
Thank you!!! Needed this comment. Still applies 2 years later…
They need to stop doing that they always use children as a weapon
Wow think about that a kid can be used to rob the bank hmmm
Triangulation
Facts
Yup
Exactly
Honestly this brought tears too my eyes. My kids mother needs too hear this message. There are so many women that need too hear this. Stop targeting the man because y'all didn't work out. Move on and live your life. The man has a responsibility too be a father too his kids. He has no obligation too you any longer at all.
Too bad men look at us as damaged goods once we have kids! We don’t get to just move on like y’all!
When a man moves on, its not about the child's mother being damaged goods. If the two of you aren't good together, it's not healthy for either of you to be together. Just because y'all have children together does not mean y'all have to be together. If it didn't work, it didn't work. Everyone deserves to be happy. Both parties involved, together or not.
@@grilly83 all facts
@@grilly83 facts....
@@jessicab331 Unfortunately as a single man without children you are damaged goods in my perspective. You gave your womb up to another man already. Your womb is no longer what it was before you birth any child. Single men without children seek single women without children first then we step down to single mothers. Single mothers need to understand that it’s never personal just how business is in the dating world. Women with children are too much of a hassle to deal with because being a step parent is a thankless job to raise another man’s legacy
37 bitter baby mommas gave this a thumbs down. (FACTS) 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
lol!
preach! !!!! my husband sons mother needs to see this and get a REALITY check.
Pinky
There should be a support group for baby mamas step parents bio parents b/c it's all about the babies caught in the middle of these adult situations
Is your husband trying to handle it or just being a punk?
Why even date a man that doesn't handle his business like a man? He's either in her ear or her pussy most likely.Check him about checking her.
@Tony Alston exactly.Adults handle their business,punks let it hit the ceiling.
This lady is not GOD. Tf?!! I don’t agree with Most of what she said.
My boyfriends ex needs to see this video too...over it
if you don't have kids don't date a man with kids. you are asking for trouble and less finances in your household
Lol it goes both ways💯
True
Everyday I thank my mom she raised me the way she did. She said "Let a man commit to you first before having a baby, let him make you his wife because that's not even guaranteed at times." These women think that the baby is a sub for a marriage or relationship. Sorry, the gift of life is so precious. You can give that to an honorable man. And with his consent. A lot of baby mamas do too much!
Exactly
Marry before you carry
Too bad i didn't get this memo before i wrapped up with a bum😭
Bless your cotten socks didnt you work it all out.
Fairy tale and all.
Life happens
it is a marriage just an open one lol
My question is why would a woman even put herself through that ? Drama drama drama...geez.. just date a guy with no kids damn. That juice ain't worth the squeeze
grace angulo yes thats what im wondering. They gettin with these people and committing like they owe them and their child something. Live your life WITHOUT them.
marilyn l seriously! Maybe folks options are limited you know, but it's still better to be by your self and get money and have your freedom. You didn't create it so why put yourself in a hard place for no "good" reason...smh. why should someone benefit from you who have no strings attached to you, no resources that you owe anyone accept to yourself..why
grace angulo girl idk its too much and too confusing for me so im good.
Works both way for man dating single mums
Cuz these bitches like chaos and dearruction because there bored
I'm so glad I have full custody of my daughter an moved on to another woman ,but the baby mama drama will never go away jealousy is a sin
andreww2111 lucky
andreww2111 never ever, ever ever?
andreww2111 I hope it does go away...one day.
Im scared im going down that same path brotha! 😢 but gotta he strong for lil man
Yup so does my fiancé she is bitter cuz she was unfit and still is glad he has custody now we are a blended family
AMEN to this video. A real mother loves her children more than she hates or dislikes her ex. It's not about you, it's about the children because they didn't ask to born.
Thank God for Sistas like you who truly understanding why we black men are suffering without our children.
I'm not even mad with woman. I'm mad with the courts who allow this shit to keep happening like they live under a rock
Same here
So true. Child support and custody laws are so unjust and it shouldn’t be up to bitter women to essentially control the situation.
@@RM-fo9qh💯💯💯💯
This is so refreshing to hear...Going through it now..
Watch a bitter baby mama thumb this done. The truth hurts they might as well face it 😊
LadyMocha They mad because the man didn't make them the wife. Maybe they shouldn't have a baby first. Let a man make you a wife before a mother.
@@ebakindeji5941 I have no idea. They are stupid and get mad at the man for not staying. A baby don't make a man stay. Their dumb asses just get caught with a baby alone. The men move on to marry other women.
Yeap some woman want to be right so bad they won't admit the truth.
I've learned as Ive grown the reason parents want us gone at 18 is the fact the benefits are cut off. I honestly think its done subconcoiusly, the child becomes a burden once they don't bring in the funds anymore. Sad programming.
Sad shit
PREACH!!! Thank you! It is about the CHILD! even worse when the baby mama has a new husband herself!
if they get remarried, you can start fighting for custody again. good trick you learn
Try having a bitter baby daddy. Who’s remarried twice and tried having more kids. It’s a control thing. He has no control over my wife anymore and can’t stand it. 😂
Mine uses my son as a tool for money. I work so hard... I give her everything, yet she still takes advantage. I'm supposed to have my son every weekend, I travel away from home for work, usually home on weekends, behind on my rent because I sent her $280 this week, left myself with $40 to live off of until next payday, know what she did? Blocked me because her momma got in touch with me to ask if I needed help with his school supplies, looked at it as a gift from the good Lord, but instead, she told me to not contact her family, or she'll block me
... Well she did, haven't seen my son in two weeks. Haven't been able to contact her in a week. I call my son every day. What do you think she says to my son when he asks, "why hasn't daddy called?" Do you think she says, "because I blocked him for talking to your grandma because she offered to pay for your school supplies"? No. She's telling him the opposite of what is true. That daddy just was looking out... Sorry as hell. But I pray, because I love my son.
Christopher Hill see to hear your story this really burns me inside. Got me right because men who are doing right by their kids financially do not get a break. You were basically struggling trying to help take care of your child and yet you are the bad guy. It hurts my heart!!!!!!! I hate you were having to endure that! I really hope things have shaped up for you and your have been able to see your son!
Flood the courts until she stops interfering
You know what, I am a childless woman and i met years ago a man with two kids and he was passing through a hard time with all the drama with his ex and probably forever as the kids are females and will grown just like the mother, so I was not secure be into that relationship as I was thinking how the future would be like with two girls teenagers and acting against me, but thank God not only these thoughts were coming in my mind but also I realized he was a real asshole , so he would do same mistakes with me as he has been married 3 times so today I don't blame that much the exe's because you don't know exactly what happened between them, you will only get the conclusion once he ended up showing his real behavior to you , it just takes some time to you realize he is not worth to be with, of course at the beginning he will come out as a victim, be gentle to you etc etc but later that guy will change to his real persona. So, today I want a childless man like me and girls don't believe in everything what that single dad says if he ended up his life handling a baby mama drama he probably deserved that, his past are full of bad attitudes towards a women. Don't be a saver in a man's life , he is not that innocent and to be honest , meanwhile you get mad with his ex, he could be having sex with her on your back, they will forever be in contact and don't be stupid to believe that it's all about their kids when in reality not most of the time. Save your ass and run !
Thank you for this!!!
I’m currently dealing with this! My significant other child’s mother is going above and beyond to disrespect me and all sorts of other things and I’m doing my best to stay focused because I know it’s an distraction
Db
No package deals for me at all, im NOT dealing with it. No step parenting ever, nor accepting/taking care of whats not mine. Not sorry either. Throw the whole situation away. 🚮 💁#FOH #NOTABLENDER #ITSNOTNATURAL #TOOMUCHBS
lol never say never 😊
i said what i said. And actually won't settle for bullshit or less. YOU must have done it. #Goddonthavethatforme🤷💁
@@Stephanie-uz5ft actually alot of women are not entertaining step parenting roles. Who really in their right mind wants to deal with a mess like that. That old saying that love is not enough is really the truth.
I know what it’s like to have a man seem to treat the next woman like gold and that hurts. To be wise and mature to say thank you God for making him a good man is a true test of your character! Thanks for sharing :)
I happen to be 45 years old, and I foreseen the possibility of baby mama drama when I was 14. I have remained single(never married), and I have ZERO children. To this day, I do not feel sorry for either men or women whom engage in rampant premarital sexual relations, but I do feel sorry for the children born as the result of this type of behavior.
Children didn't ask to be born to 2 idiots whom can no longer stand the sight of each other, and when either parent cannot get along with each other in the presence of their child(ren) regardless of reason, then these children would be better adults if they were not in either parent's custody. They would be better children if raised in a boarding school paid by taxpayers. At least with no more drama in their lives, these children could focus on making themselves better than their parents could ever be.
But, we must face the fact that we do not live in a perfect world, nor do we live CURRENTLY in a police state. If we ever do find ourselves in either world, hopefully the children will never know what life is like with 2 idiots as parents.
My mom was in a relationship with her boyfriend she was breaking up with. She met my dad and somewhere in between she was raped at gunpoint. I could have been three men's daughter, but my dad married her and divorced her when I was 5.
Shit happens but I wouldn't want anyone feeling sorry about me being here.
I grew up on welfare because my mom became sick. Life was quite tough but it made me tougher and I now am a truck driver a hard worker and rather successful and I am greatful for my parents doing the deed and giving me an opportunity in life.
Not engaging in premarital sex will not secure you some kind of exclusivity with your partner.
Not sure what pretentious rock you seem to live under.
If being single and not having a family offspring or legacy to pass on then that is absolutely your choice ☺️
I'm not going to miss out on the bliss and blessing of motherhood just because it doesn't fit some hallmark stereotype 😆
This is exactly what I'm going through. My mans ex using the child as a weapon and causing so much stress on our relationship. Its so sad because I'm not sure I can keep going with this. She is relentless..even though I'm great to their child and he tells her he loves me because I'm always nice to him she still tries to break us up.
Just another reason not to date single moms if they do this to their ex they will do it to you if you have a child with them so the second you figure something out like this is going on hit the road and never look back.
Ryan X Some men stay and aid in it. Telling the baby daddy that he ain’t shit and telling the fiancé that she’s the one causing issues, calling her names, etc. Don’t care that the woman their with is the reason as to why nobody can get along.
And this is exactly why so many women are “bitter”... look at what y’all say about single mother yet baby daddies get praised and have women beating down the door!
Same applies to bitter baby daddies. Let's just be honest because there are some bitter men out here.
Well said sister! You spoke a lot of truth hopefully it falls on ears that will listen & take your advice 👏👏👏
She is the fuckin truth......
Amen!! I cannot agree more! This is what I'm dealing with now with a bitter baby momma! She hates my guts because I'm pregnant with a new child. I've stressed that the relationship with his daughter will not change and she is being nothing but difficult, and court is possibly in our future. She threatens it about every 2 weeks. Thank you so much! ❤
It's so refreshing to hear from REAL black women.
My Baby momma does everything in her power to try and control me and punish me and wont listen to reason. I TRY and work with her on raising my daughter but she is hell bent on ruining my life any chance she can get.. I feel so helpless...
My husband knows exactly how you feel when it comes to his daughter from a previous relationship. You are not alone and my heart goes out to all the good men out there who are trying to be great Fathers.
thank you.
Marco Castillo I'm going through the same shit 😠
Marco Castillo I 1000% understand
Marco Castillo don't give up bro,karma comeing her way
Best thing I've heard in a long time they don't want to hear this preach on sista preach on been through all of this
I will never. Be with a man especially when I know another woman put in work in him and he didn’t treat her right…you won’t find me building an empire of a hard working woman’s tears..if it happened to her it can happen to me
I wish all the baby mama's would watch this, but if she's anything like my situation... she won't hear a word you said, because you're not talking to her smh Your video is point on.
Thank god for INTELLIGENCE and Rationally educating the confused !!!Subscribed immediately!!!! Thank you sister! 💪🏽
You have a subscriber for life. I am going through this as a step mom. It’s so hard!
Me too.im a step mom it is so hard to deal with these baby mama
Preach!!!!! This video could be switched around to talk to men also because us men get jealous when the woman moves on too.
Aaron Gray tell me about it
Finally
Maybe beta punks.
People need keep the comments pertain to the video. The sister is critiquing black women who alienate children from their father, when the man MOVES ON. Keep it relevant to the point. There are a lot of videos that bash black men, so go on over to Derrick Jackson's channel.
Bro honestly that is neither here nor there. The sister is speaking a powerful truth and there are more than enough people bashing black men.
We need stop having premarital sex before married
Solved
this need more views 🙌🙌🙌🙌
Cathy James Thank you Cathy
I'm dealing with this with my husband. Please pray for me
wally121000 haha
Pray for the child.
Your husband's full of bull if he lets you get his crap.
He won't set her straight because he's still messing with her or something
I'm so thankful for you posting this. You spoke with clarity and the upmost honesty. Thank you for speaking up on this issue
I love u i love u I love u.... you have touched every note and I do mean every note I’ve tried to be in my 2 sons life but the mother omg I can’t but I’m happy to know that there are sisters out there like yourself to preach these words.... thank you so much
The sad truth is that the man is usually still sleeping with the mom. If you don't like what the baby momma is doing, go to court!!!!! It's really that simple.
well its not that simple
@@Mr.Rosesright_now it really is. If a man doesn't want to mess with a woman, he won't.
@@maryscheitler2488 Actually it really isn't not only do most courts rule in favor of the women, but you also need to provide hard evidence against her.
@@maryscheitler2488 well , he has to prove the woman is bad,prove why he is a better choice and also prove to the court why their decision is wrong. A lot of Fathers prove all that and still get 50percent.
@@maryscheitler2488 one guy, was able to prove to the judge that his child'mother intentionally gives him the wrong medication plus a Jailbird lives in the woman's house, he still got ignored
as much as I didn't want to hear this I needed too... thank you for posting this!
Thank you thank you thank you!!! I’ve been dealing with my boyfriends ex for 5 years and it has been terrible. He’s an AMAZING father who just wants to be happy. Thank you for your words and support!!!!
Lord, AMEN about this packaged deal! My one aspiration in life is to never become a baby mama and join #teampetty
Im sharing this with my sons baby mama, she has some lesson to learn in life. Thank you for teaching the lesson all strong women should know.
I'm 20 years old and I'm going thru this shit right now and it ain't easy...
Word of advise to the young 'dont ever board this boat'...who feels it knows it...I dont think anyone has a baby mama drama like the one im dealing with.
Girl please run. Go find a child less man without drama
Hey, that's a volvo your driving. That brown piece gave it away. 😂😂😂😂😂😂
GIRL YOU BETTER SAY IT .......DROP THE MIKE ON THIS.....GO HEAD GIRL...PREACHHHHHHHH SISTER PREACH
This needs to be shared across the universe 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🤦🏾♀️
Like paying 630 something dollars a month for child support only for my bm to drop my daughter off at her other baby daddy house n stead of finding a baby sitter while I'm at work 🤷🏾♂️
Chris Rock Sounds like spite. The other BD probably still smashes..But still wants you, but because your not entertaining her she's using the only leverage she has...
Your Child.
What? Check her ass! And I'm a woman telling you she tripping you don't know him he could molest your child cause that's not his child.
As long as that child is safe and love? Why does it bother you? She is still with family and choldcare is expensive. It cost double that 630 a month.
Alison Hall The problem is, the child should be going to see their father and not someone who isn’t biologically their father. $630 is plenty of money for the child’s necessities. You can get free childcare if you’re on medicaid and also try to get family or friends to watch them, sure they wouldn’t mind.
Preach!!!!!! You hit the nail on the head. Need more women in the world to hear this. Nothing but the honest truth. God bless you
This just uplifted me, literally going through this mess now with my bf
same! that's why I came too. It felt so good to have my frustrations and feelings validated watching my man and his poor kids go through this
Me to it's too much this babys mom's thinks she is entitled!!
🎯YOU BETTA SAY IT SIS....THIS IS THE TRUEST & THE REALEST YOU VIDEO I'VE EVER SEEN....IN REAL LIFE💯!! BRAVO SIS👏🙌👏🙌👏
Very well said. Thank you to infinity.
You are so welcome.
Thanks so much for this sis i am going through this right now.i have to pull back from the mother and just pray on the situation.
Real talk I like this black sister talking real facts thank you god bless you .
@mika joy I don't have to be in a single moms shoes to know. I was raised by a single mother ALL my life and the majority of the women in my family are single mothers but what they taught me was valuable and live it out by putting their children's relationship with their father first! All the wonton my family are friends with their exes new wives or girlfriends. My grandfathers wife was friends with my grandmother and became a customer of grandmother's and spent a lot of money with my grandmother. So no I have been a single mother but the examples that I have had would allow me to be an excellent single mother and baby mama! Young women can learn something today.
say it sister u right
I feel like I need help with a situation
So my boyfriend has a kid and he tells me that the girl he was sleeping with at one one ask him for a child because she wanted a child with a white man and she just can't have a kid with a black guy. She wanted to be a single mother which to me it just sound absolutely ridiculous. Now she decided that she also wants him and that I can't be around her kid. I really don't mind if she doesn't want me around her kid because she is looking out for her kid. But now she is driving him crazy and wants to move away with me to another country so nothing follows him. I'm a little torn because he didn't want a kid with her but he decided it was ok to do her a favor. But I still consider that he should man up and help support and race that kid because it's still his no matter what. She lives in an bad area so he wants to take away the kid just to give it to his mom and I strongly object to that. I want to break up because of this but do love him.
Adri C Hello Adri, Thank you for sharing your story. This sounds like a very difficult and emotional situation. Especially if he felt like he was helping her but never In the mind frame to raise a child. The does need both parents whether they are a couple or not. As you have already acknowledged the child should be considered when moving away. I know your boyfriend is just running from the situation but it still does not change it. The child would still suffer because he is taking the child away from their mom and being given to someone else to raise even though it's the grandmother. So the child will have resentment because they. Was taken away from their mother and still missing out on relationship with their father. And as for the child not being able to be around you...well that is a 'Control' move. She is trying to control your relationship with the child and your relationship with your boyfriend and his child. Her ultimate goal is to make sure all 'Three' of you do not become the family unit that she actually desires have with him. So see the three of you together reminds her of what she could have had but she does not so she wants to make sure he does not have it either. So it's not that she does not know you or that she is being cautious she does not want her child getting attached to another woman that is connected to her child's father.
EXCELLENT VIDEO.....You spoke nothing but THE TRUTH💯...👏🙌👏🙌
I can not related to the angry baby mama.My husband have a daughter before me, Me and his daughter are 9 years apart she grown now with 3 children of her own and I been with him for 21 years and have 3 children with him 2 adults and a 3 year old. I totally agree with you. What people need to realize everybody is not meant to be together even if they do have a child.You have to prepared your mind what if we break up and we have children.I believe conversation like this have came up and we tend to ignore the warnings signs until it's to late and we become bitter knowing we did them wrong also.Never get comfortable in a relationship always prepared your mind what if He/She decided to move on.You don't own anyone and nobody owes you an explanation for leaving.If my husband decided to leave me he owes me nothing just take care your child anything else is irrelevant as long as the child is not abuse and well taken care of is all that matter.
Preach sister!
This is litrally happening to me.... I pay the maximum anount of child support 563 a month, and im not even complaining about that at all because its just as much as my responsibility to take care of my daughter as much as her mother but her mother STILL KEEPS HER AWAY FROM ME! whats worse is she will let me talk to her on the phone for like a month straight and then abruptly cut me off like a bat shit crazy person for absolutly zero reason at all. So then im left with the torment of my 4 year old daughter telling her I make her happy when i call her but i cant even reach her because her mom flat out cuts me off from her...like if i could i swear to God i would litrally post the facebook messages between me and my daughters mother just to verify what im saying.... this shit truly truly hurts like nothing has ever hurt before, but I greatly apprecaite black queens such as yourself taking the time out to make this video. God bless you sister i needed this....
Lady Charmaine is sooo pretty and powerful when she speaks
The priorities are simple God, Spouse, then Children (be it step kids or otherwise). I believe both parties share equal responsibility for the child and their wellbeing. I totally agree adults should be able to put their feelings aside for the sake of the child. This is a child, and it takes a village whether both parents are in the home or not to raise him or her. It's already hard as it is in the world we live in adding drama to an already open wound doesn't help anybody. As a parent, it is beneficial to have a conversation (the child's mother, the father and the new spouse) to set standards, morals, values, support for the child so that their environment is stable and consistent. Granted all situations are different, but let's not confuse the past with the present. Using your child as a weapon is no way to get the closure or vengeance one seeks (give that burden to Jesus). I appreciate this point of view and hope young women and men take heed to the truth and being spoken here.
The only thing I disagree with is that the child has 23 chromosomes from the father and not 24. Everything else was right on the money. :)
@Maya H Well, it IS scientifically correct information. It's not about wanting to be right, it's about acquiring and improving knowledge.
@Maya H Well, you're presuming it was the only thing he picked up. If someone erred by saying the sun goes round the earth, most would be prompted to correct it too. I don't see how that is petty. I think you're the one reading malice into it. Can't help you with that, I'm afraid.
@Maya H but he right though. It's ok for a black man to want to be right about this or anything else he's right about... especially if it's facts.
@Maya H it's facts... You upset over truth? Then you gonna definitely be upset when Judgement Day comes
@Maya H indeed
Tbh, if the new woman was the mistress while you were in a relationship with the father I do think the mother has every right to say she doesn't want her kids around the mistress. Otherwise, I completely agree.
I can agree with this
The mom Or dad has a right Regardless. It’s their CHILD.🤷🏼♀️💯
@@Kstaynthemjz see 2:17
@@Kstaynthemjz exactly it goes both ways
i wish i could like this a million times.My baby mother need to see this
Amen! I couldn't have said it any better myself. I am black but was born into a two parent home. My
Moms friends daughter got knocked up at 16. At 26 she has four children with 4 different baby daddies. She plays her kids like pawns to punish her baby daddies. I am 25 and do not have kids. I dated a man who had one child with a crazy baby mama who made it a point to make my lives miserable. She played her son as a pawn forbidding him to see there son because she was so damm jealous and even keyed her exes care. She egged my house and sent me harassing emails so I calles it quits. Yes there are a few good but its hard to find them..
I am literally applauding this video with a HUGE smile on my face!! Well said LadyCharmaine, you hammered the nail right into the coffin!!!
Can't be said any better than that 👍🌷
OMG!!! You are the smart woman that all these unfit mothers should hear. SUPER!!!!!
LOVE IT!!!!! Please make one for baby daddies too
A mother should definitely know who the father has around their kids..
I wish men would speak up on this
I love this, this is great arguments.hope the right person are listening to this, so that bitterness can go away.
It really is. My bf and I just had a baby...he has 2 kids with 2 other women, the youngest born 5 months earlier than our daughter. Both of them use their kids as pawns...it’s so emotionally stressful 😔they don’t know about our daughter. He hides her...it hurts me so much. She’s my first baby and this is his 3rd...I be feeling like he hides her cause he’s embarrassed but he says he hasn’t mentioned her cause his ex will not let him see their baby....I’m so stupid. But these are the cards god gave me
Are u still together?
PREACH!
Came here from PMP to offer my support and sub. Facts.
I wish more baby mommas thought this way. If I ever have a child with a man who ends leaving me or vice versa I know in my heart that the love I have for my child is enough to keep the relationship as cordial as possible and if he wants to be a father I would let him. And I would never be disrespectful and bitter towards his new woman because I've been on the receiving end of that situation. The kid should never be a toy that you decide when and how to take away from the father just because you're scorned that he left you.
Alexis Castro you're beautiful & insightful
Thank you for saying this. My wife found out her mother lied to her about her father didn't love her, when really, she wouldn't allow him to see his children because he didn't want to be with the mother.
I am going through this right now as the girlfriend. His baby mama always starting issues.
And what is your boyfriend doing?
bet this chick britanni the bm who creates issues, she keeps comin back here to roast someone who goin through this lololol
@@shannaiaabellano1338 I have never gone through this and I'm too smart to go through it.Sorry you like to deal with clowns and their issues then blast your business online.
isnt that what youre doing lmao
@@shannaiaabellano1338 no.
Thank you so much sister for speaking the truth, it personally means the world to me. Against, thank you 🙏🏽
Amen im going through alot im thinking bout giving up please help me god
Amen. everything you just said is the truth.
Been married 14 years and she still JEALOUS ! I still PRAY for her!
Well said! Thanks for being an advocate for those of us men trying to be good father's to our kids despite our ex's every sabotaging effort.
This was spot on! I'm in a relationship with someone who's estranged wife (he's going through a divorce) has been acting up bc we are happy and don't want drama. Thank you for this video🙌🏾
So you date married men.
Rightfully so, going to divorce court & signing some papers doesn't break the marriage covenant. Society doesn't realize that marriage is permanent, it isn't like dating. The reality is they will always be married because they are one flesh for life. Get out of this adultery & find a man who has never been married before.
this indeed had me in tears because my ex refuses me to see my son trying to get visitation its sad she told my son he better off without me this was a strong message
I have seen both men and women abuse their spouses kids...I have a friend who didn’t want his daughter around his baby mama’s boyfriend because he got bad vibes from the dude...we all thought he was tripping because the two of them still dealt with each other on a sexual level and her new relationship was getting in the way of that....fast forward 3months the 2 year old baby is in the hospital with the clap...when they tested every male that had access to her, the boyfriend was the only one to test positive
Exactly. That’s why I don’t agree with her.
Preach!!! This goes for all single/divorced moms.
And if he meets a woman that's WILLING to be apart of y'all's kids lives, don't knock that!!!!! just because you make/or help make a child don't mean you're a parent!!!!! And it takes a STAND UP man/woman to MAKE THE DECISION to love a child that isn't biologically theirs.
Get real... My kid does Not Need another person around just Cus💯. She HAS parents. Lol, Yal people need 2get a Grip.
Man You Are The Truth Ms Man If Women Cant Respect And Understand
Good point ..
However i seriously think behaviors are reinforced not on an individual bases but from a stand point of community. Our society through ( Music, Hollywood and Social media ) normalised ungodly living. We are deprived from our true heritage and in its place, Hip hop. Where every women wants to be a Kardashian and every man wants to be 50 cent. Not to mention the effect feminism has played in shifting the family dynamics. What we see today is the result of a world that has denied the laws of GOD.
Thank You You Hit the Nail Right on the Head 💯
I was a child that was in the middle of this type of situation 😩
Great day in the morning this is so good. I love it.
I wish I can see my child! she's 7 months and never seened her!
Help Me seen*
Go to the courts demand a paternity test when you prove it's your child you Will then have rights but then child support will also come into effect but if that's your child that's what you want to do anyway.
Are you sure that's your child?If you paying for a kid you can't see,get a DNA test
Wow Lady Charmaine is purely drop dead gorgeous
I friend of mine told me that his mother told him that he ain't nothing but a paycheck.
Amen thank you for this video. My baby mother always starting with my wife n I'd have another kid, but once I got married and had another 👶 all hell broke loose. Baby mother still in love and all she wanna do is tried taking my son away from me but I am a wonderful dad to my kids.
Funny thing is I told her to go open up a bank account so I can make weekly deposits she told me she didn't have $5 to do it I told her when I put the $100 in there every week you can get the $5 she still had excuses
Can you replace my baby’s father? Lol
Been there... now a grandparent and hurt grandma moma drama syndrome. has started.. I taught it was over after paying off child support.. round 2.
Yeah she taught me something... how crazy look. Big sista you are speaking the truth.. it a hard do for your sista... this hate is a root cause of the destruction of our families.
We are not breeding children..not establishing strong values in families.
It's a sad situation..