Video essay: I am a narcissist

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 ต.ค. 2024
  • #videoessay #mentalhealth
    A take on modern psychology from someone diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder and autism
    Tumblr: / ambivalentpsychopomp
    Instagram: ...

ความคิดเห็น • 23

  • @mercurialrose
    @mercurialrose  ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Btw if anyone wants a more detailed look at specifically a more autistic perspective on these issues I suggest reading this essay I wrote a while ago :) docs.google.com/document/d/10oOX5JKknji2ub64xMjUWumZ5A24NaPWwsJ0nNaVLu0/edit

  • @sunnyscript1224
    @sunnyscript1224 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Boosting this with a comment

  • @exa_eille
    @exa_eille ปีที่แล้ว +1

    banger video. have algorithm boost comment

  • @0rbeez
    @0rbeez ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Gods this is such a good video! I’ve always been confused about npd, and hearing that it stems from Mr.I Wanna Fuck my Mom makes so much sense lol

  • @kuprum7
    @kuprum7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Hiiii girl I've just started watching the video but hiiiii :33

  • @quinnstraught9636
    @quinnstraught9636 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I saw your comment on Strange Æons’ recent video and thought I’d check this out, this is a really good video! I love the angle you take, especially with the pathologisation. Turning the alien or disliked into the ill as an excuse to reject or demean or even eradicate them while maintaining a self-righteous hero narrative is all too common in modern culture, “I’m not insulting them, I’m just concerned about their health” and all that. I feel the same way about the medicalisation of trans bodies; while obviously a lot of us want certain procedures, our life experiences don’t start and end at having hrt, or getting “the surgery” (ooOooOooOOOOOooo), and the requirements this practice has lead to in institutions, especially the diagnosis of “gender dysphoria” (not that it’s not real, but like… I don’t need to be diagnosed with mad tranny syndrome by some cisgender person, I already know I’m one), and, well, a lot of us _don’t_ want them, or not all of them at least. I’d never thought about how this kinda stuff is pretty much pathologising morality, even though I like to think I’m pretty well read in postmodern philosophy, thank you for making this video and helping me learn a little more :)
    Also, the part about having to deliberately take breaks and stuff, I get that. I’m not personally narcissistic, but I’m AuADHD and have slight ODD-adjacent tendencies Ig (I’ve never brought it up with psychs or anything, but I have a “squirming” sensation when I feel I’m being compelled to do something, it’s just icky and weird like fuck you get off my back)- idk point is I relate, being around people I ostensibly enjoy the company of slowly turns into a hassle and an obstacle, simply caring about almost anything becomes progressively more stressful and harder and working up the energy to act an impossibility. I feel like I’m turning to stone and desperately struggling to squeeze blood from myself.
    Also squids and cuttles make surprisingly good b-roll.

    • @mercurialrose
      @mercurialrose  ปีที่แล้ว +7

      This is such an awesome comment and you’re so right about the parallels with modern transphobia!! Bigotry tends to always ring the same, i might make another video going into the comparison in more depth in the future as it’s something I do think about a lot! Glad you enjoyed the squids they are my special interest :))

  • @medmed5436
    @medmed5436 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    cant watch the video rn either but commenting for b00st!!! keep it up hell yea

    • @medmed5436
      @medmed5436 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@I_am_drowning_in_my_own_mind just did boss i watched it 2 times just in case

  • @requiemforpsyche
    @requiemforpsyche ปีที่แล้ว +6

    wooo girl ate i cnt watch this rn but im commenting to boost the video i will def watch this later ATE

  • @joleneonyoutube
    @joleneonyoutube ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is such an important video thank you for making and sharing this incredibly vulnerable truth. It shouldn't be shameful and I believe that eventually we will exist in a more empathetic (genuinely, not the morality crusade and virtue signalling nightmare hellscape we currently exist in) society that cares less about labels and more about actions and consequences without all the violence. You deserve community support and validation, the same as anyone else.
    I really enjoyed watching this as someone with autism and other neurodivergence and also a squid special interest, who already knows a bit about NPD. I can't wait to share it with my neurodivergent people.

  • @Ultralightbeam000
    @Ultralightbeam000 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This was so well made! Your analysis is really, really profound and reminded me (specially on anti-freud takes) of the analysis deleuze made on psychiatry. I hope you keep making these!

  • @gh.stb12rd
    @gh.stb12rd ปีที่แล้ว +5

    just finished watchin this. Imma be googlin some criterias bc this a bit 2 relatable

  • @youtubeuniversity3638
    @youtubeuniversity3638 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Very Ocean.

  • @rainbowlack
    @rainbowlack ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much for making this video! As far as I'm aware, there's only one person in my life with NPD, but three of the closest people in my life have BPD. The stigma around their personality disorders, their thoughts and their being, fucks up everyone.
    The moments of joy one may get when finding out what's going on in their head can be so fleeting when they're immediately hit with stigma.
    I'm autistic and OCD. Learning that I was helped me figure out a lot about myself. It also further introduced me to a world of cruelty and ableism and discrimination.
    At worst, my peers were actively cruel to me, and at best, they didn't know what to do with me.
    Stigmatizing our disorders does nothing to help heal us. Stigma didn't strengthen families, stigma didn't help my mother recover from addiction, and stigma didn't help my friends in their darkest times.
    Whatever misdeeds or even abuse one may have faced at the hands of people with personality disorders, that does not make demonizing them okay. It only perpetuates the cycle of abuse, because guess what, people don't like being fucking miserable!
    We're in this fight together. When my mother's overwhelmed and flooded with torrents of grief, I can be there for her, to give her a hug and let her cry.
    When I am overstimulated and burnt out, my mother is there for me to give me somewhere quiet to rest and a kind face to talk with.
    And it doesn't matter if one of us is personally feeling the other's emotions. Empathy on its own has no inherent value.
    What matters is giving each other space and support, and calling out the bullshit we are so often subjected to.
    To anyone reading this who has NPD, BPD, bipolar, any and everything along those lines; I love you. I stand with you. You are worthy, you belong, and you are valuable as a person just for being you. I love you so, so much.

  • @tiredmilkshake
    @tiredmilkshake ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This turned out so great :>>

  • @puppypalice
    @puppypalice ปีที่แล้ว +2

    First of all, very interesting video, learning about different bigoted is very interesting. Second of all, as an autistic person who’s reaction to similar traumas my response was to be always empathetic and have become a bit of a “people pleaser” hearing about your experiences was interesting, I couldn’t relate but it was very illuminating and I will consider your video when I encounter people exhibiting these behaviors. Over all this video was extremely informative and I would heavily recommend it to anyone.

    • @porcgaming6504
      @porcgaming6504 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Lol autist 😂😂

  • @Bone_Thief
    @Bone_Thief ปีที่แล้ว +2

    a needed take

  • @ieatalgae
    @ieatalgae ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is super good, 10/10 video essay 💞💞💞

  • @ElizabethMidfordHatesCops
    @ElizabethMidfordHatesCops ปีที่แล้ว +9

    HELL YEAH!!!!! Probably the first ever video on the planet that is a good video about NPD. Entirely in love with the perspective of being both autistic and a narcissist. Because for real, everything you said is so incredibly true. This is the most relatable thing I've encountered in a while. I don't often search NPD related tags on Tumblr, because they're oversaturated with "narc abuse" crap, and because of that I don't come across a whole ton of NPD related stuff. I think this is my first time hearing the thoughts of a fellow autistic person with NPD, and it feels so good to know someone out there deeply understands.
    I hope I articulated that well. This is how I am about the fact that this video exists *:)* I might watch this again tomorrow and listen to it when I mow the yard later this week. I want this to truly seep into my brain. I love this so much. So so so so much.

    • @mercurialrose
      @mercurialrose  ปีที่แล้ว +3

      This makes me so happy omg!! There should definitely be more research done on the overlap between autism and npd because it’s so fascinating and surprisingly common