My Toxic Relationship (+ How I Left)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ต.ค. 2024
  • hi guys. thank you so much for allowing me the space to talk about this. i hope this helps anyone out there know that you are not alone in this - these types of relationships are extremely common & can be very confusing to come to terms with. my mood, emotions, and life are infinitely more balanced and happy once i finally left this relationship. i didn't talk about everything that happened in this video, but i shared what i felt comfortable sharing today.
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ความคิดเห็น • 921

  • @meghanhughes
    @meghanhughes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1407

    I LOVE YOU GO SISSY GO!!!

  •  3 ปีที่แล้ว +781

    Big love to you

    • @HannahLynnification
      @HannahLynnification 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      TH-cam-worlds colliding in the best way 😍

    • @madi.sue.ak23
      @madi.sue.ak23 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Omg omg

    • @Lee02065
      @Lee02065 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      Peep the BLOOM book in the background ❤️

    • @peytonmetzler3743
      @peytonmetzler3743 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Y compris😐😮

    • @bluepeachwhispers6845
      @bluepeachwhispers6845 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      your book in the background then you in the comments! 💛

  • @aggrodoom
    @aggrodoom 3 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    I left a toxic eight year relationship. I knew it wasn't right, but I could not leave it because I was young and dumb. He brought out the worst in me. It's been over three years, and I'm still so scared someone is going to draw that person out of me again. I hated the person I became. I learned a lot from that relationship, but I left with so much trauma.

  • @CaldoDeJess
    @CaldoDeJess 3 ปีที่แล้ว +326

    The taking photos is a weird coping mechanism I’m sure others share, like myself. When I would cry in severe pain like that, I’d look in the mirror or take photos too just to kind of like give myself a reality check. I needed to see myself.

    • @NallahBrown
      @NallahBrown 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      "I needed to see myself." A WORDDDD

    • @coolm3th
      @coolm3th 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      it's really grounding. i suffer from depersonalization and seeing myself cry is so deeply connective. it's not weird at all if it's helpful!

    • @sedona3player
      @sedona3player 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Omg I would film myself and make voice recordings at my low points, I didn’t know others did this too! It helped to speak it out loud too

    • @bbypinkcherry
      @bbypinkcherry 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@sedona3player same! i do voice recordings. i don’t even know what i say in the moment sometimes, so it’s crazy to hear them back once i calm down and ground myself again

  • @courtneyschaump
    @courtneyschaump 3 ปีที่แล้ว +507

    The hair? the eyebrows? The lashes? SERVING LOOKS MISS LINDSEY

    • @erins928
      @erins928 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      We can't forget the nails matching the shirt! 💁🏻‍♀️

    • @andreasablada9789
      @andreasablada9789 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      She is beautiful

  • @callitambrosia
    @callitambrosia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +342

    i generally don't comment on youtube videos, but i really want you to know that i am so proud of you.

  • @hannahmarie629
    @hannahmarie629 3 ปีที่แล้ว +193

    such a fucking queen. able to admit that you contributed to the toxicity of the relationship, while also reflecting back on how the toxicity was harmful to you. i love you.

  • @XxKiDCuDiFTWxX
    @XxKiDCuDiFTWxX 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    My sister was in a toxic relationship on and off for 7-8 years. I’m so proud of her for getting out. She’s in a healthy relationship now. I don’t live in fear of what might happen to her or what shit her partner might hurt her.

  • @KirstieReich
    @KirstieReich 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    my toxic relationship created PTSD for me.. so crazy. you're so strong. thank you for sharing

  • @Katherout
    @Katherout 3 ปีที่แล้ว +511

    This is such an important video. Hearing you speak your truth was so incredibly powerful and I hope it can be the turning point for so many others in the same challenging position. We’ve all seen the instagram graphics of “signs of a toxic relationship” but hearing you speak to your lived experience is so much more meaningful and real.

    • @nicksanders9148
      @nicksanders9148 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      jesus loves you, theres help out there

  • @brynbabbitt
    @brynbabbitt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +394

    Can’t imagine the strength and bravery this took. We’re all proud of you. On another note, you look 🔥 here. Go off sis

  • @chandlerforbes
    @chandlerforbes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    it speaks so much on your maturity to be able to take accountability of your actions in a toxic relationship. it will help so many people to learn from your experience, and to grow in yourself.

  • @lisahughes4885
    @lisahughes4885 3 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    What an amazing and Divine creation you are holding such Grace. There is no act of courage and strength that doesn’t involve vulnerability. When I think of that time, I’m so grateful for you! In being a rock of strength and courage for me, you became the rock of strength and courage for your authentic Self. There is so much love here for your viewers that may be in a similar experience. Look at you! Look how far you have come and the mountains you have climbed. I was honored to carry the daughter who carried me. Thank you!

  • @marywright730
    @marywright730 3 ปีที่แล้ว +262

    We already knew that Mama Hughes was a saint but this just proves that even more 💕 so proud of you for sharing your story for anyone that needs this right now or in the future

  • @causemyinsanity
    @causemyinsanity 3 ปีที่แล้ว +176

    I left a very toxic relationship where we were each other’s worst enemy but we didn’t know how to live without each other. Both of us were at fault for sure but knowing when to cut ties is detrimental and it just went on too long. Now three years later I have a sweet little baby and a new fiancé. There’s more to life than the cycle you’re trapped in and you CAN get out. So proud of you!

  • @taylorcason9087
    @taylorcason9087 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Saved this video 6 months back for when i finally was going to be out of my lease and be able to move on from my abusive toxic relationship, listening to it as I’m driving to my next place and it’s exactly what i needed to hear thank you no idea how much this helps to know I’m not the only one

  • @brigitte6157
    @brigitte6157 3 ปีที่แล้ว +126

    it's really commendable how gracious you were concerning him in videos originally, after the breakup.

  • @daniellekohut2213
    @daniellekohut2213 3 ปีที่แล้ว +156

    Lindsey, I hope you grasp the magnitude of power that lies in these incredibly strong words of yours. Not ONLY are you impacting those currently in toxic relationships. Not ONLY are you impacting those who have been in similar circumstances. But you are also PROTECTING those who have never experienced such things. Because of your video, many folks out there will know the warning signs to look for, before getting deep into a toxic relationship. What an incredible story, dear. Thank you for sharing your story and for using your story to impact others. You are destined for great things, your light shines so brightly.

  • @mandyambrose6739
    @mandyambrose6739 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I have this cute little sign in my house now and it says “I still remember the days I prayed for the things I have now”. Nobody knows this but every time I read it I remember years ago when I was in a “toxic relationship” and today I look at my husband and my girls and my heart just melts because I am seriously so blessed. The bad times really do teach you a lot though and I would t be here today if I didn’t go through that 😌

  • @coolm3th
    @coolm3th 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    there was a moment when in my first relationship that was not just toxic but abusive, and we were driving and i told him to pull over and i couldn't breathe because we were just constantly fighting for the whole drive and i screamed for him to pull over and i got out of the car and just literally screamed (dramatic i know) into an empty parking lot in the middle of the night and that was such a low point for me but still remained in that relationship for months anyway. it's been years since i left him but the feelings still remain, all sorts of jumbled. remembering and reminding yourself of how low you had gotten within the relationship is so important. the next day will come and yesterday can seem so far away and unimportant. thank you for sharing. i've been watching your videos since I was literally 12??? i'm 23 now, was 19 when i left that relationship. healing is good and i'm so beyond amazed by your accountability and understanding of youself. you're an incredible, bad ass role model and i'm glad i got to mature with you as one of the creators i enjoy watching. hope the universe blesses you with a lot!

  • @tarrenwilliams3055
    @tarrenwilliams3055 3 ปีที่แล้ว +192

    I just left a toxic relationship a week ago and this helps so much. I was building up the courage for so long and you have no idea how much this has helped. I know I deserve better. Thank you so much ❤️

    • @lindseyhughes
      @lindseyhughes  3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      girl YES. the period after where you’re adjusting again is so hard but it truly gets easier every single day! focus on you. proud of you 💛

  • @jcerns95
    @jcerns95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I relate to the pics 😭Toward the end of my relationship I started writing all the comments he said down and the date so I wouldn’t be tricked , I knew it was wrong and that was the truth I needed to see & the reminder & it’s what gave me the strength to leave .

  • @macymackay6071
    @macymackay6071 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    “The girl who cried Wolf” wow I have never heard something more true to not only my own experience, but others as well. Lindsey this is so powerful to share and your words, your own experience/ feelings will help so many people. It’s weird to say, but comforting to hear people are not alone in this. Thank you for being so vulnerable and posting this, you have my love and support!

  • @44MsPickles
    @44MsPickles 3 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    I remember my ex screaming at me because I didn’t want to try some knew type of hummus or some dumb shit and then when I tried to leave and remove myself from the situation he changed his tune and BEGGED me to stay. I knew it was time to get out when I called me while I was out getting groceries wondering why I was taking so long and accusing me of cheating. Know your worth ladies, don’t let the losers bring you down and like Lindsey said, don’t be afraid to set boundaries 💜

    • @ApoorvaaC
      @ApoorvaaC 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Exactly! What she said was so true. Toxic relationships can be of so many types. If you’re always fighting and if someone always brings out the worst in you, it’s time to leave. There have been relationships and people who are not overtly aggressive or clearly toxic but if you’re always unhappy and if they’re bringing out the worst in you, it should raise red flags!

    • @taychristine2993
      @taychristine2993 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      This video as well as your comment feel like a look into my past relationship..only recently have I begun to allow myself to look at things that happened & process the emotions in a safe state. The being screamed at over the phone, accused of cheating while at the grocery store.. glad you're away from that now ❤

  • @mirandaanne8697
    @mirandaanne8697 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    sitting here crying with you. i ended my toxic relationship in 2019 as well. i resonate completely with being alone & not telling a single soul or telling them a huge downplayed version of the toxicity.

  • @delaneyexpressionalart
    @delaneyexpressionalart 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    my last relationship was so toxic & abusive, mentally, emotionally & physically... i was stuck for 2 years, i didn’t think i would make it out alive.. but i did & now i’m trying to heal & work through my PTSD & trauma from it.. my therapist & my current bf are my bestfrinds. my support system is everything to me, family, friend, etc. thank you so much for this. i love you. big hugs to you, i know this is not easy to talk about. please be kind to yourself!

  • @katiemcgarry1020
    @katiemcgarry1020 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    First relationships leave you so vunerable to toxic elements. You have no idea what you’re doing. Being past that point I’ve learned so much, and I want to thank you for sharing your story to help other young people realize things are toxic

  • @flamcrit
    @flamcrit 3 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    This was so hard to hear Lindsey because during that relationship when you were sharing on TH-cam I had NO idea that this was what you were going through. You are SO strong Lindsey and now more than ever all of us are SO happy you found Jared. We love you so much thank you for sharing and keeping it real. 💙

  • @SarahBurgettJ
    @SarahBurgettJ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    so so proud of you for opening out and getting out. setting boundaries after this experience will lead you to an AMAZING man made just for you so dont lose hope. until then, KEEP THRIVING SIS🤍

  • @prettywildnights
    @prettywildnights 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    oh lindsey, thank you for sharing your story with me. i went through a toxic relationship too and i was addicted. i was addicted to the highs after the lows and i was addicted to him. i too would take pictures of myself after sobbing and journal to try to tell my future self to leave, but i just couldnt. i "loved him" and i wanted us to work. it didnt make any sense. i never told my family and friends and i chose to ignore the obvious red flags. i was ashamed and because i isolated myself i had nobody to lean on. it took years to heal from and i still have wounds today, but now i know how to set bounderies and have a deep understanding of what i want, need and deserve.
    wish you the best in your new relationship!

  • @efroggys
    @efroggys 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Ugh yes when someone brings out the absolute worst qualities in you that you don’t even recognize in yourself it’s truly scary. No matter if it’s a boyfriend, girlfriend, friend, family member, get away from that person. It’s NOT healthy mentally and can scar you for life if you stay.

  • @RecklessNWanderlust
    @RecklessNWanderlust 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I think taking photos and recording is a response to being gaslit. I felt that impulse very strongly in my marriage.

  • @rebekahboxx
    @rebekahboxx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +128

    I feel like you’re going to help so many people with this.

  • @ElisabethLaurenNelson
    @ElisabethLaurenNelson 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I have deeply struggled trying to vocalize the pain that I went through in my last relationship. This video gave me that voice without having to express it.
    I just sent this video to my mom so that she could understand without me having to revisit everything.
    I honestly wish I had seen this video three years ago. However, as you said I know that I needed to have that enlightenment moment on my own and at my own pace.
    Thank you Lindsay.
    This video makes a difference. A big one.

  • @chandlerforbes
    @chandlerforbes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +93

    I AM SO PROUD OF YOU FOR POSTING THIS

  • @nicolei5196
    @nicolei5196 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I feel like I’m watching myself talk about my past relationship...... it’s so crazy how common this can be for people.
    It is soooooo incredibly hard to get out, but now I’m in the best 5 yr long relationship of my life!!! It teaches you so much and now you will thrive in your new relationship too!!

  • @anastasiamariediaries
    @anastasiamariediaries 3 ปีที่แล้ว +152

    I’ve been in this exact place before and hearing this was like listening to myself. It was insane how similar things were. It literally brought tears to my eyes because I understood the emotion so well. I’m so glad you’re in a better place! You deserve to be happy. 🤍 Thank you for opening up about such a personal subject and sharing the value you’ve been able to take from such a difficult few years with others.

  • @MissLeonable
    @MissLeonable 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I took photos too! I thought I was over dramatic... But I wanted to remind myself too. I sugar coated, I tried to hide fights, I tried to change just so we wouldn‘t fight anymore. I get it.
    I‘m also strong and independent and still went back a thousand times. Oh and: I too saw a side of myself I never knew existed. SOOO angry!

  • @oddreyy
    @oddreyy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I'm so sorry you went through this but I hope you realize how much sharing your story is going to help other people. I was in a toxic relationship for almost 4 years and this video was SO freakin relatable and helped me put some of the emotions I felt into words. I still get so embarrassed and cringe when I think about how much time and energy I wasted but it really is so hard to leave and you don't realize how bad things actually were until you get out.

  • @beverlyny3255
    @beverlyny3255 3 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    not even a minute in but have to express how much respect I have for you. you’re so strong, we love you!

  • @Bakinbunhead
    @Bakinbunhead 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    This couldn’t have come at a better time. Just got out of a toxic relationship that involved abuse after drinking. The hiding bc I knew i would end up getting gaslit and getting sucked back in is so real. I wanted to believe it would get better. But it never does. I really appreciate you using your platform to talk about this. You are amazing!

  • @bbypinkcherry
    @bbypinkcherry 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    oh my god the boundaries thing is so important. it was also my first relationship and rooted in toxicity from the start. i thought i was being too much if i set them but i wish someone told me this. my mom didn’t help me at all bc she was so against me dating and i felt so alone. he completely disrespected me and would get so mad at me when i did have moments of “hey, don’t do that. that hurts me feelings”. and he would get so mad at me god forbid i slipped up. same thing with the alcohol, but mine was with weed and vaping. he got so mad at me when i decided to go to my house instead of his for my work leave during high school and would get genuinely mad at me when i would tell him not to drive high, WITH HIS FRIENDS, AT NIGHT, especially after he told me that he drove on the sidewalk a couple of times. thank you for making this video because too many people become victim to this and don’t even realize. i’m happy for your growth and hope you never have to experience this again.

  • @briannahpugh2211
    @briannahpugh2211 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    You went about this video in a very resectable way and it goes to show just how responsible and mature you are to be able to take accountability

  • @stylishbeauty12
    @stylishbeauty12 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I left my toxic relationship about 7 months ago of a 5 year relationship. It got to the point where I got tired of the relationship and how I was being treated. I knew I could not deal with it any longer. There was a point where I should have really left him back in 2017, but I did not, I eventually came back to him. But now I know I deserve much better, and I hope anyone who is reading this, you deserve better as well

    • @dose0fem
      @dose0fem 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is literally the same situation I’m in 5 years later and our son I am exhausted… it’s every single day now that I’m unhappy

  • @jcerns95
    @jcerns95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Proud of you , I recently left a 6+ year relationship . It’s very hard but worth it.

  • @greta6685
    @greta6685 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I'm crying. I am currently in a relationship, we've been together three years, and I would not say we have a toxic relationship at all. But I do 110% relate to your "this relationship brought out a side of myself that I've never seen". And I know we both deserve better. But I love them so much and they're my first love and we have grown so much together, and I find so much comfort in their presence. I don't know whether or not to break it off. We have ups and downs, rarely ever to the point of "let's take a break", but it does get a little bit exhausting - the cycle. I really really do not know what to do.

    • @valeriamartinez5329
      @valeriamartinez5329 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m also kinda in the same situation rn it’s a cycle that just keeps going it’s exhausting and sad. We actually just had a very bad fight this past Monday and I wanted to end it so bad but couldn’t. I left and spent 2 days at my moms to just take a break. We ended up talking and I’ve decided to give our relationship one last chance. A big part of me just knows nothing is going to change, as sad as it sounds I feel like I’m just waiting for another fight to happen. But ofc I also hope Monday was the last time and we can some how move past this and stay together. Seeing this video tho feels like a sign.

    • @greta6685
      @greta6685 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@valeriamartinez5329 I feel like it’s a sign too.. and I swear we have said “one last chance” to eachother so many times... ughh :(

  • @jackie22698
    @jackie22698 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I left a toxic relationship about 3 years ago and I am still dealing with it due to the fact it became a legal matter. I have been a fan since I was like 13. I turn 23 in a few weeks. I wanna thank you for keeping it real and most importantly speaking up and using your platform. I love you Lindsey! I’m so happy you’re striving and being the best you, you can be. ❤️

  • @mariahalfred6678
    @mariahalfred6678 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I almost didn’t watch this because I am currently in an amazing, healthy relationship but I decided to watch this anyways and it was sooooo reflective of my last relationship. Definitely made me feel like I could relate to you and I’m not alone. Most importantly, I’m not crazy!!! Glad we have both moved on to healthier relationships❤️

  • @user-gn6nw6pp7v
    @user-gn6nw6pp7v 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Wow, this was so spot on.. i used to lock myself in our bathroom and cry on the floor, thinking “look at yourself” and thinking about ways to end my life while he was just screaming thru the bathroom door, calling my crying manipulation. Next day i just pretended nothing happened and start all over again even tho i was so exhausted. I wasn’t in tact with my emotions at all. I think i was disassociating a lot . I left him last week, for good. I have never been so happy in my life.

    • @user-gn6nw6pp7v
      @user-gn6nw6pp7v 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I love your top btw, where did you get it?

    • @graceluke_
      @graceluke_ 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m proud of you. 🤍 I hope you’re doing well and flourishing without him.

  • @PandaDomoKitty97
    @PandaDomoKitty97 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I think you hid in the laundry room because you needed to hear someone say that. Your intuition guided you there. So glad to hear you're doing so much better today Lindsey

  • @LacedByLiv
    @LacedByLiv 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I saved this video to my watch later playlist the week my boyfriend and I broke up back in September. Today I watched it and when I tell you this felt like you were describing my entire relationship it's crazy! I wish we could have a chat about this because GIRL we went through such similar situations. You are much further ahead by now on your healing journey, but I hope to get there soon enough!

  • @s676n8
    @s676n8 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Lindsey I’ve been watching you for years now, since 2012. Thank you for making this video. I also went through the same thing, around the same time as you too.. i dated someone for 3 years (2016-2019) on/off and it was so hard for me to let go. He was my first boyfriend, first everything. And he was so toxic. I was so scared to live without him but i knew he wasn’t good for me. Just last year i had the courage to block him bc he still would message me after our breakup... i finally healed and i started dating someone new last June. My new relationship is so much healthier and it makes me feel so grateful to have left my last one

  • @crystalmokane
    @crystalmokane 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    you don’t understand how much i needed this

  • @thespinellishow3866
    @thespinellishow3866 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    My therapist told me people in a toxic relationship go back at least 7 times before actually being done. I remember laying in bed starving because his needs were more important. he convinced me to let him take my car and when he was gone I remember praying saying I need out I need help. I kid you not the next day everything came pouring out. I moved out that week.

    • @alyf.6698
      @alyf.6698 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Wow I didn't know that and now it all makes sense. We aren't all alone in this and it makes it less painful.

    • @MorganM2399
      @MorganM2399 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I’m sorry you had to go through that

    • @alyf.6698
      @alyf.6698 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@MorganM2399 It still hurts but tbh I learned a lot of what not to do and how to love myself more.

  • @catginger3984
    @catginger3984 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I no longer talk to anyone about it im embarrassed and ashamed of myself for going back everytime. People dont understand how it feels.

  • @jujumay2307
    @jujumay2307 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Your videos were a huge escape for me when I was in a toxic relationship during this same time period that you were. I had no idea we were fighting the same fights. Most of ours were alcohol induced too. So glad were both out and onto better things. Love ya 💛🌞

  • @rylee4268
    @rylee4268 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I can totally relate to ending up in a super toxic relationship b/c you don’t have a lot of experience in more serious ones and don’t know exactly what your boundaries are at the beginning and how to enforce them. this is a super important video❤️

  • @melrose5895
    @melrose5895 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I took a picture last summer of me crying my eyes out in bed holding my 1 year old. I don’t know why, but it kills me to look back on it. It’s not as weird as you think. I’ve watched you for like 8 years at least and this video has me crying my eyes out. I wish I could hug you so badly Lindsey. I love you and I’m so happy you got out and you’re happy now!! Your videos are what makes me so damn happy every single week!

  • @neutraloatmilkhotel
    @neutraloatmilkhotel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    These types of videos are so powerful/impactful for so many of us. I really admire how open and vulnerable you are with your audience. We see you and we love you girl! ❤️

  • @amandaruiz2984
    @amandaruiz2984 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    we went through a break up around the same time and watching you be independent and so strong has been so inspiring. i’ve watched you since pink room days. love you and sending you so much positivity queen.

  • @funnsizedd123
    @funnsizedd123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    Just left a toxic relationship this past weekend. He lied and lied and lied and I never felt more out of control (mentally) in my life. And I’ve been in physically abused but the toxic mental abuse is seriously so draining and hurtful and confusing.

    • @teabubbles4ever
      @teabubbles4ever 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      you are so strong ❤️

    • @funnsizedd123
      @funnsizedd123 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@teabubbles4ever thank you🥺🥰

    • @d4ngly
      @d4ngly 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      🌱✨ glad you left ☀️🤎

    • @cherishreallove8990
      @cherishreallove8990 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m so proud of you .... I know that feeling

  • @Kate-bo6sb
    @Kate-bo6sb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I fundamentally relate so heavily. It's so so so unbelievably hard to leave. I remember calling my mom and telling her everything that happened. Because I knew once I told her really everything, I couldn't go back. Having those people to rely on is so so so important. I had some friends brutally letting me down at this time. I feel so deeply for everyone

  • @michaelacolin2825
    @michaelacolin2825 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It must have been so hard to leave but I'm sure everyone watching this is proud of you for doing it. And being able to admit where you feel you weren't 100% yourself. Self-awareness is such a healthy trait. You are inspiring so many people. Thank you for this.

  • @Maddwavybby
    @Maddwavybby 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I was in one for 8 years; finally moving on feels so free. We fought constantly & I was drained all the time. Hope you're doing ok 🤍

  • @ulovenyasia
    @ulovenyasia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    Been watching you for years, I would’ve NEVER thought. It’s so crazy what people could be going thru behind closed doors. Sending lots of love and peace your way💜 I needed this video, currently in the same situation✨

  • @vodkawonderful
    @vodkawonderful 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    my first relationship was from 16-20 and was so similar to this. i felt totally isolated because i never shared what i was experiencing with my friends or family. totally relate to the cycle of feeling "addicted" to the relationship.

  • @CheyenneHayden
    @CheyenneHayden 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh my god. I got chills when you showed the photos of you crying. This is also something that I did in my toxic relationship that I, thankfully, eventually got the chance to leave. I never quite understood why I took those photos, but what you said makes a lot of sense. A reminder of the pain!...so I couldn't excuse it away anymore. I'm so glad you made it out

  • @ThePepsiGirl1999
    @ThePepsiGirl1999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I almost cried seeing the photos you put in- I’ve been there too. I love you girl, you’re so strong for telling your story ❤️

    • @ThePepsiGirl1999
      @ThePepsiGirl1999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Alright. The tears started flowing when you talked about your mom being there for you and holding you accountable. I had the same. exact. experience. I’m so happy you have a good support system ❤️❤️❤️

  • @mckennaimoh3226
    @mckennaimoh3226 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Thanks for posting this I have followed since beauty baby 44! And this was the perfect timing I kicked my husband out this morning and hours after I get this it feels like a good affirmation that it’s okay to focus on myself and that I cant just keep fixing something that isn’t truly fixable with me and him

  • @JuliaGuliaXDD
    @JuliaGuliaXDD 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    i love you girl i am so proud of you for putting this out there & not only helping people that need to leave a situation like this but also helping people like me. i got out of a toxic relationship almost two years ago. we didn’t have constant screaming fights, it was quite actually the opposite. we would get into a disagreement & his responses would get me so upset that i didn’t even know where to begin. like you said, a side of me came out that i didn’t know was there. i would shut down and completely restart the next day like the hours of argue mental and tenseness never happened. this video helped me realize just how toxic me & him were and why i would never go back. i’ve been watching you (and megan) since i was so so young, almost 10 years & i find myself connecting with you on so many things. virgo sisters

  • @xoxoIsla
    @xoxoIsla 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Lindsey, I’ve been following you since I was in middle school. I’m 22 now. This video came at a perfect time for me. I relate to so much in this video... the polar opposite ways of handling conflict, alcohol, taking photos of yourself crying, the rollercoaster analogy, and the addiction of going back to this person... it is all so familiar to me.
    seeing this video helped me more than you’ll ever know. I know it must be nerve wracking opening up about something that you kept so private for so long. But you are helping so many people and it’s comforting to know that I’m not alone. These kinds of relationships can make you feel so isolated and like no one could possibly understand. I would love to see more videos about this and how you work to heal from a toxic relationship. Thank you. I love you so so so much❤️

  • @MarissaRachel
    @MarissaRachel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    This video made me so emotional! Thank you for sharing your story Lindsey, it's incredibly brave & courageous of you! ❤️💕

  • @Torr.explores
    @Torr.explores 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I burst into tears around the time you started crying. I’m so sorry that you went through all that. I’ve been through such a similar situation and it’s always so hard.
    I also really relate to your comment about Instagram and archiving what looked happy but really wasn’t.
    So proud of you for being able to talk about this. 💕

  • @rtibntya
    @rtibntya 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for sharing your story. I spent 12 years in a toxic and emotionally abusive relationship. It was terrible and damaging and took a lot of therapy to process that. You being so open and honest is so helpful and reaffirming. Thank you for being vulnerable when it’s the hardest thing to do. Sending you so much love.

  • @lbenner97
    @lbenner97 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    you can tell truly how much you've learned, grown, and healed from this experience. the way you accepted responsibility, and spoke for only what you experienced. seriously could relate to so much of this video, and i hope someone that needs to see this is touched by this video

  • @SabCherry
    @SabCherry 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    One of the moments when I wish we were girlfriends and could talk for hours...Thank you for your honest words!

  • @Aaloo_Parathaa
    @Aaloo_Parathaa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I cried while watching this. Felt like she's narrating my story... Toxic relationships break your self confidence to the core. You are an amazing person girl!! Stay strong and happy

  • @bubbache
    @bubbache 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I resonated with this so much. My first relationship sounds so similar to yours and just like you I kept going back and willingly put myself through the emotional rollercoaster. It feels so good to be on the other side of it. I’m glad you’re happier now!

  • @emschlef
    @emschlef 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I got out of a toxic relationship recently and this made me feel so much better about my own situation. Thanks for expressing everything, you're going to help a lot of people with this video.

  • @belleelephant
    @belleelephant 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    The way I dropped EVERYTHING to watch. Love you so much queen thanks for sharing your story!!

  • @xbraidqueenx
    @xbraidqueenx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much Lindsey. Watching this really gave me confirmation that removing a toxic person from my life was the best thing for me to do.

  • @limabean29
    @limabean29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    As someone who knows what this feels like, I thank you for speaking on it. There are people who needed this. My heart breaks for you in those pictures, but it takes a lot of joy in where you are now. Bless.

  • @charlottehalstead1156
    @charlottehalstead1156 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for speaking openly about this, I can resonate so much. The feelings of shame surrounding remaining in this kind of relationship is a suffocating pain. Like you, I hid so much from family and friends. I couldn't bring myself to acknowledge how what seemed like the "perfect" relationship in the beginning could become such a living hell. Overtime, you become addicted to the chaos of alternating between fighting and love bombing, making it so hard to get off the roller coaster. I hope you are able to find your peace and heal moving forward ❤

  • @sherchu2198
    @sherchu2198 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This is so important!! It's so easy to get caught in the moment but I feel like a telltale sign of a toxic/bad relationship is when you're embarrassed to tell close friends/family about these problems, because deep down you know that you should not be experiencing these things.
    You are a strong woman Lindsey! I'm glad you had to the courage to leave.

  • @Pollyalba
    @Pollyalba 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It's been a year since I ended my 5 year relationship, the ups and lows were so strong as you said! I still ask myself how could that go that far, but also know that the more time passes and the more difficult it is to wake up and realize everything. It's incredible how many people go through such similar experiences, I thought "yes, same!" throughout the whole video! So happy for you, Lindsey!!

  • @amandabeautygirl33
    @amandabeautygirl33 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I’m so proud of the courage it took you to post this ❤️ Keep going, babe!

  • @afJacklyn99
    @afJacklyn99 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This resonates with me so much. Been watching you for YEARS! You actually live in my hometown. :) I’m so glad you decided to share this, this brought back so many flashbacks and so much of the same behaviors. I’ve blamed myself for so long because I was an alcoholic and felt like it was always my fault but I was pushed to the Eve. I felt crazy!!!!!!
    I am not over 5 months sober, and have grown my relationship with God. He met me right where I was at and my life has flourished. ❤️ I love you girl!

  • @steph956
    @steph956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I’ve watched you since you were in high school and seeing you evolve as a woman has been such a honor. I am SO PROUD of you 💕

  • @vivchau8
    @vivchau8 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    There's so much I related to watching this, from you talking about how addictive the cycle is, sugar coating the relationship, and the emotionally avoidant attachment style. Thank you for talking about this; toxic relationships are so looked down upon, but no one knows how hard it is when you are in one and how tough it is moving forward. I'm in the healthiest and happiest relationship now and am still healing from the traumatic experience, but that's okay!!

  • @kbohez
    @kbohez 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    oh sweet, sweet Linds... i’ve been following and supporting you for so long and this just absolutely breaks. my. heart. and at the same time, your story relates to me so much too. from being quiet about it to loved ones, to audio recording, to taking pics of yourself,... every single thing (except the drinking part) happened to me too. and i am honestly still in that relationship (almost 6yrs now). so i can’t tell you enough about how much i feel for you, and especially how PROUD i am of you for leaving and putting yourself first.. bcuz look! at! you! now! an absolutely GLOWING woman. thank you for making this video, for reminding us there’s light at the end of the tunnel and for being so vulnerable. you are so strong & so incredibly loved by thousands and thousands 🤍

    • @teabubbles4ever
      @teabubbles4ever 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I am sending you love and light

    • @kbohez
      @kbohez 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@teabubbles4ever thank you so much for these kind words 🤍

    • @beautyfromwithin0173
      @beautyfromwithin0173 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@teabubbles4ever hey did you ever get my email?

    • @teabubbles4ever
      @teabubbles4ever 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@beautyfromwithin0173 I haven't checked this week aha
      When was it sent?
      Sorry for the long wait if it's been a minute! •́ ‿ ,•̀

  • @nadjaradnic5497
    @nadjaradnic5497 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I never comment on youtube videos but I just wanter to say thank you for this, it really helped me

  • @insteadofcoursework
    @insteadofcoursework 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for this video, I hope this reaches the person who needs to see this 💕 I broke up with my boyfriend in December after 2.5 years, I knew it wasn’t right for a long time but it wasn’t until I listening to your podcast when you spoke about being in a toxic relationship which made me realise that is what I was in. We didn’t have big fights but he neglected me emotionally and made me feel so lonely. My emotions were all over the place and it wasn’t until I was on the bus going to see my friend and I was crying and I didn’t know why that made me realiseI had to get out this relationship. I feel so proud of myself for ending it even if it took me a long time to do and you should be so proud of yourself too and especially for sharing your story 💕💕💕

    • @teabubbles4ever
      @teabubbles4ever 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      good on you for getting out of it!! ❤️

  • @rachelnonnemacher3707
    @rachelnonnemacher3707 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I had a very similar experience in 2018, it takes a lot of strength to admit you had some toxic actions as well. So so proud of you for getting out of it & telling your story.

  • @tkeyahhortin8552
    @tkeyahhortin8552 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    From one toxic relationship survivor to another.. I HEAR YOU, I LOVE YOU, I'M HERE FOR YOU ❤️❤️

  • @hannahdog101202
    @hannahdog101202 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m so proud of you. I’ve been there before and did the picture thing too ironically. It’s hard to avoid the reality that a relationship is so bad when the photos show clear evidence of that truth. So much love for you and positive vibes for everyone else going through something like this

  • @kay220
    @kay220 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    There are so many of your viewers, including me. That needed this video more than you will ever know. Thank you for being like a big sister to us for 10+ years. We love you ❤️

  • @harmonyraye9986
    @harmonyraye9986 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I used to be in a really unhealthy relationship from 2019-2020 and I can relate to this so much. I know how you feel, I'm so proud of you and I know it's not easy to leave a relationship like this, but I'm proud and I love you and you're NOT alone. 💜

  • @beaniedewitt
    @beaniedewitt 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I genuinely sobbed. I have followed you for so long I feel like we are best friends. I am so happy and proud of you getting out of that toxic cycle. I am genuinely proud of you and where you are at in life. I know leaving was so much easier said than done. I am so proud of you and I love you!!
    💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

  • @kc2076
    @kc2076 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    i hear you about the photos and recordings. I did the same, recording the fights so i wouldn't forget the tone when we were on a 3 or 4 day 'up'. i would remind myself i am worth more and worked hard to triangulate friends willing to be involved so it was all out in the open. it work after 2 months. you are a strong lady, thank you for sharing
    also, little bonus you posted this on my birthday and i found this when i was trying to convince myself that things weren't that bad

  • @malo2984
    @malo2984 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I have never related to situation so much. All the fighting and alcohol being involved. Always fighting while you should be having so much fun at events or traveling. It’s SO hard to get out. I’m so happy you and i got out of these awful situations.