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I'd say you're right. Generally, women leave because the man is just not it, whereas men leave out of stupidity or immaturity, or straight ego. What do you think?

​@@LordJayAndrew​@LordJayAndrew I am sure most women have no sense at all. Also they are usually immoral and abusive. They dump easily the good men and love and live long with horrible ones. Drunks, drug addicts and criminals are very popular among women. And I am not talking about some stupid young chicks but I have the most horrible experiences with 40 and 50 plus yo women. They are just insane. No logic at all. Zero. My 75 yo mother is a total psychopath too. NC does not work with women bc they do not think, they do not care and they move on to another man to abuse.

​@@marguskiis7711 I don’t know about this, man. I know that women can be unkind to men they perceive as weak, and the level of this behavior can vary based on the woman’s character. But this doesn’t necessarily make them abusive when you look closer at female nature and how they’re wired. The truth is, women need to feel safe, and when they don’t, they respond in very typical ways to indicate at their instinctual need for safety and security. ‘Abuse’ implies a lack of respect. Even toxic or immature women tend to treat men they respect fairly well. Poor behavior isn’t excusable, but it’s also not as black-and-white as we men might want it to be. I understand that women have a reputation for avoiding accountability, but accountability hasn’t been an instinctual requirement for women-obedience has. The modern woman has been taught that obedience to men is wrong, which has become a global issue. However, obedience still naturally shows up when a woman is in the presence of what her mind perceives as ‘strength.’ This ‘masculinity’ women find attractive manifests as: Competence Assertiveness Purpose Resistance to manipulation Drive and ambition Social respect or dominance Unwavering self-confidence Even humor-women want both security and fun, and a man who provides both in abundance will be seen as ‘top-tier,’ because humor implies intelligence, which translates to competence, which in turn, reads as masculine. Men who lack these qualities rarely experience women in the same way as ‘strong’ men do. When a woman spends significant time around a man she views as weak, her treatment of him will often reflect her lack of respect. But before we villainize this natural response, consider whether we, as men, act any differently toward women we perceive as unattractive or promiscuous. Something to remember: women don’t necessarily want a ‘good’ man-they want a ‘strong’ man. And ‘good’ doesn’t always mean ‘strong.’ A woman in the presence of a man she deems strong will naturally respond to him with respect, even if she’s immature or toxic, because otherwise, she risks losing access to him. I often see men complain about how women treat them, but many of these men seriously lack the traits that instinctively signal ‘strength’ to women. Additionally, a strong man wouldn’t find immature, conceited women attractive. The hard truth is we attract what we are. If I keep attracting immature, conceited women, then by implication, I’m likely a weak man, because toxic women seek out weaker men because they’re easier to manipulate. Similarly, a woman without decency can’t realistically hope to attract a strong man. We men need a level of accountability and honesty too. Maybe our struggles with women are the universe’s way of telling us we’re not yet the men we could be. Perhaps we should focus on growth, leveling up, and healing old patterns or wounds. What do you think?

@@kylereese9462 I really appreciate that, thank you !!

@@teraedwards7835 let’s keep defending the DA . They don’t get enough support on the internet! 🤍🤍🤍

@@teraedwards7835 that’s awesome that yours came back, and i hope the time apart sorted out the cause for you guys separating in the first place. People need to want to heal, I agree, and that takes accountability, something I mention in this video. Some don’t have an idea on why they behave the way they do, something I also agree with, but again, that’s why accountability is important. Until we can self reflect, no amount of no contact will result in a long term, healthy relationship, even if the ex does come back. Thank you for commenting, and sharing your experience and thoughts. You’re awesome!

@@LordJayAndrew love your response to this ❤

@@hazelmclardy8450 🤍🤍🤍

This video was awesome and one of the best i have seen i and i have seen like milion of them. Why? Because really it is better to MOVE ON. No matter if they come back or not. I don't even want her old version - her fatal lack of cummonication, stone walling, gaslighting, silent treatment is not accetable for me now. She will come back healed ENOUGH or BYE. Also because of your comment i gave him sub which i forgot to gave. He made very good video imo. And yes they come back sometimes but more importantly is to come back to you - to be you, once again.

@@haihai5293 🤍🤍🤍

Interestingly, the avoidant will act like you're invisible, but he sees you. It''s the love you have to give that scares the avoidant. A secure attacher would welcome all you have to offer. When we move on and heal, we become secure, and therefore, attract secure. Thank you for commenting.

@@LordJayAndrew I asked him why he treats me like i'm invisible. He answerd me after 19 hours: this is how you think I act? After that he said that we are not compatibile. I told him to have a nice life. But in the last two months I sufered like crazy. It's been 10 days since i'm ok. We are LDR. I traveled 800 km to treat me like i'm invisible and he didn't even want to have a conversation în the last 3 weeks... F... him. Thank God that i'm ok. It's been such a long journey to be normal.

I’m sorry you had to go through that. Attachment styles make dating messy, but as long as you stick to the healing journey and focus on becoming securely attached, to learn and grow, you will eventually arrive at a place where you’re attracting the person who’s at the same level of healing as you. If you ever need help, someone to encourage and support you, please reach out to me. I will leave a link to my discord server where we can always chat and help each other heal and grow. discord.com/channels/1272114711202103449/1272114712804458529

@@LordJayAndrew He gave me heart reaction at one selfie that I posted. What does this means? One week ago he said we are not compatibile.

@@Lavinia-uz7ul it might be a genuine appreciation for the post, but it also could be a testing method to see if he can still have access to you whenever he wants. Remember, avoidant partners want all the validation an Anxious offers but because they don’t need to put in any effort. Anxious partners generally accept breadcrumbs. Don’t be that person. Don’t accept bare-minimum effort. You deserve full-blown commitment and devotion. Your inner child will try and convince you otherwise, but as you heal, you’ll start to find bare-minimum effort unattractive.

Hi @trixtrix1767. It's not a nice feeling, but I hope you never forget that you're worth coming back to.

@@LordJayAndrew ❤️❤️❤️

I don’t know. I don’t see them going on the i internet calling other people the worst, the way I see none-avoidant people do.

@@LordJayAndrew that's only because they never cared enough in the first place.

@@TheUnkindness avoidant people do care. They’re just disconnected from themselves. They don’t know how to be tapped into their feelings. They struggle just as much as we do. Accepting this shifts the focus from the hurt they caused towards peace within, because it tells our brain that we weren’t rejected because we’re unloveable, but because they can’t show up due to their own struggles.

@@LordJayAndrew No, they just go onto the internet to label anyone with a negative view of avoidants as anxious and excuse their behaviors and to tell others not to feel the way they do because they were neglected in childhood...while forgetting to mention they are likely to go on and neglect their own families...

@@rapthemusical very good points!!!!

Hi Suzie, first off, I’m sorry you went through that. And good for you for taking the stance of prioritising yourself. But I think you misunderstand this video. This video is not about encouraging people to stay in a relationship that makes them unhappy, but to, first: understand the DA struggles too, as a way of preventing bitterness to take root in us, and to help us find our centre after being triggered. Second, to recognise our tendency to avoid dealing with our own trauma. The DA shines a light on what we’re avoiding deep down. The DA has flaws, but those flaws arnt yours to solve. You are your responsibility.

@@LordJayAndrew thank you for your reply, I very much appreciate you taking the time to read my comment and reply. It’s very hard not to be bitter, I am holding so much anger in that I’m trying to release because he really broke me. I’ve always felt like a strong person but because of him I became so weak and I have never been with anyone who made me feel like that. I suffered so much, sacrificed so much for him and I’m still coming to terms with all I went through. It’s very difficult for me because I really loved him. Part of me still does but he just destroyed me. While I’m writing this to you, the tears won’t stop…. 😢

@@SuzieNewzie ah Suzie! Thank you for this comment. My heart goes out to you, and I wish I could be there with you in your pain. That anger you’re experiencing is seomthing I too have experienced, and I promise you, it won’t last. Please do me a favour and sit with that anger. Please process it. Allow your body to feel. Allow your body to release. To heal. Forgive him (when you can), and not because he deserves it, but because you deserve to be free, and strong, and tender and soft. We all love you!

Hi @SirBLM! The pain of a breakup sucks, but the lessons we learn from them are crucial. Its the lessons that will determine the quality and potential of the relationships we get into next. I am here for you, Legend!

@@MatthewWatsonAudio thanks my bro! Miss you!

@@LordJayAndrew Ditto, you beautiful soul!

Typically yes... But how this impacts us is in our control. Thanks for commenting @novel5027. I know when I was deeply struggling with my own attachment style, I found comfort in reading the comments of the videos I was watching. It's helpful to know one's difficult experience is shared by so many. Legend!

But when it's your perro husbando suddenly the patience is there!.. Sigh, women... ☕* *porcelain cling.. sip* * ..

@@coffeepot3123 I am a daughter of one. Watching my mom not getting love she deserves., and than he left her when she needed him. They can’t deal with big emotions and your needs. Why would you pick that person for a husband? You”ll probably end up sleeping in separate rooms,and any normal need you have as a partner will be put off until you learn not to ask for anything,as they can’t handle it. They avoid conflict at any cost and nothing gets resolved. Maybe they can heal with long therapy , but Why would you do that to yourself is the question.

@@novel5027 🤍🤍

@@novel5027my gosh I’m so sorry your mum went through that and you had to witness that all. I left mine because of the same reasons, thankfully I didn’t marry him in the end! ❤

🤍🤍🤍

@@SandraSoll most of us don’t realise we’re avoidant. I’m glad you found this helpful. Are you doing alright?

@@georgiajones3668 glad this was helpful, and thank you for leaving a comment

@@n.tizzle323 absolutely!

@@tanyamyburgh4519 greats points! Love it.

Let's do it!!!

@@estiansmith3641 thank you so much!