วีดีโอ

I usually am coping with my husband’s Lewy Body dementia fairly cheerfully but I have found that, for me, it is odd things that bring the sorrow to the surface. In the car the way to church, my husband suddenly turned to me and introduced himself and then asked me my name. Actually his utter surprise when I answered him would have given me a chuckle, but for some reason it made me cry this time although his confusion with who I am is nothing new. I can’t explain it except that maybe I just need to grieve periodically and then move on.

This is the very BEST information I have heard & confirms my present situation. Thank you so much for being honest & REAL.. I have 1 Sibling on side, working on the other 2. But, either way, MWD is going into care soon. Your videos are a BLESSING to me - I have binge-watched quite a few. Very authentic & encouraging. Bless you for taking the time to do them. 🙏

My mum is 102 and is at stage 5.5!! Will it really last for a year or more?

Your videos help alot thankyou

I am living this nightmare with my aunt right now. 🙄

Thank you a million times for your videos. Your personal story helps me see my future. My wife has Parkinsons and alzheimers. She is at home. The sundowning is very hard on me. She thinks outloud, babbling to herself. Wild eyes looking at nothing on the ceiling, wandering. I am her age so i dont have your youth. Your videos make the future real. Now i have to get it together to make dinner.

I had to take certain channels, especially FOX, out of my dad's viewing options. He was often hysterically angry over some lie from that toxic channel. It damaged him greatly to be pumped full of hate and fear every day. Doing this to old people is evil.

Great tips

Wear blue.

It looks like I'm dealing with vascular dementia with my Mother, it's been a few years. I agree with you. Where she goes after her death is already set, there's no changing it at this point, so that is a done issue. I will grieve her, I will miss her at least for awhile, but what is the option. My Mother will be 79 this year. Cold as it may sound I do not want her to live to be 80 nor 87; that would be incredibly painful and selfish. You deal with the situation and go on. Before Mother was 28 3 of her children and her beloved husband were dead. I say this to say, so one will get the impact; my Mother had said a time or 2; Either you deal with reality, or it will deal with you. When I get the call telling me that she has died this I will know; I may not have tried my best, but I have tried my hardest. I'm in a position to see her every day, and I do. The time will come, as it does for all... Ecclesiastes 8:8 Authorized Version aka KJV There is no man that hath power over the spirit to retain the spirit; neither hath he power in the day of death: and there is no discharge in that war; neither shall wickedness deliver those that are given to it. Thank you...

I've found this thing to be quite "Sybilesque"...

You are helping a lot of people! I hope you truly know this! Thank you so much!!

Ok my moms ANOSOGNOSIA symptoms come out as her asking far too many times a day to “GO HOME” her awareness being in and out bc SHE IS HOME! But what her constant asking to “go home” while she’s already at her home, she means her one of her parents’ house, HER CHILDHOOD HOME! BTW thank you for that video on that term… at this stage for mom is can really see the different behavior from regular Dementia, Anosognosia, or sundowning… for my mom who sundown starts around 2-4pm nearly every day… the Anosognosia is coming more frequent and sporadically… couple times when she wakes up with it, others we have a normal dementia morning and by 11am to 2pm it really shows up she’s going in and out of self and environment awareness… she can want to go home… then realizes she is at home… or she also thinks there is somehow DUPLICATED me, the kitties, the furniture etc and she cannot grasp it’s not duplicated but she IS AT HOME! For ANYONE who has been able to place their loved one in memory care or assisted living and you feel any kind of bad or upset from your loved one desperately or continuously wanting to go home… PLEASE DO NOT! I’ve learned that this is just part of the repetitive LOOPs… yes, they may grasp sometimes they do want to go home, you can even engage to see which past home they might mean, but their never gonna STOP looping until those memories are fully gone! I’m currently enjoying all moms looping, bc it pours out of her nonstop and I have Deborah who has made the videos of her experience who at this point in real time January 2025, has gone out the ending side of the tunnel, proving this long goodbye WILL END! I’m blessed my mom n I are Christian and I want her to just go to heaven and stop all of our suffering! But for now, God is in charge, He has purpose in this… and I’m serving Him by serving moms needs… currently we are still home together, but I believe things are progressing beyond my capabilities… but I’ve been forever impacted by Dementia causing diseases and the caregivers who must step up and have created these communities to help, where there is so little help and understanding!

#2)…. Just Wooooow, good on you for knowing what you could handle! AND #4)… WOWZERS!!! 🤯 All these opinions of family uninvolved in actual caregiving but still talking with no understanding… I’m just glad I do not have from family bc honestly they’re ALREADY estranged for all their own reasons and as an introvert with limited energy and really all my energy is this caregiving journey and learning I need to live healthier myself!

Thank you for this valuable information.

So true, just important that they are in the circle of life🩷🩷

A little less than 2 years ago, my father, dieth Alzheimer's dementia, the alcohol kind and but he lived a long time with it for 12 years because he stayed at home and we took care of him. It was rough the last 2 years, especially for my mom, because up until the last 8 months of dad's life, mom wanted Primarily do it on our own, not completely, but mostly, and it is definitely a debilitating disease. God bless you all.

When we initially took my mom to a doctor for help they gave a general dementia diagnosis. When that Dr. retired the next one casually said during a follow up that my mom has Alzheimer’s according to her record. When I asked what the treatment plan would be she was put on the medication to slow memory loss and we were told if she gets irritable and angry there is another medication for that. That was it! My PCP actually loaned me the book the 36 hour day and was more helpful than my mom’s doctor.

Thank you so much❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Awe, I love your content ❤❤❤❤

I’m so glad I’ll see your mom in Heaven… sister in Christ ❤

Caregivers and Anyone who has PARENTS ❤ PLEASE when nothing is wrong, when NO issues are showing up… Have the Hard conversations in lightness of ways… my grandmother had seen nursing homes and end of life with other family members… she absolutely helped by legal papers and services CHOSEN & PAID FOR IN ADVANCE! Ever couple of months when she felt like it after she was in her 90’s and less frequently when in 70’s & 80’s grandma, mom, and myself would make TEA or COFFEE n desserts whatever and she would re explain where to find things what to look for etc AND after she sold her own home… telling me about her credit cards etc, I was able to just say you should NOT leave me with these bills to solve… it was that level of freedom to talk. She passed at 96 still sharper than many! Bc she was open and did these things, my mom HAD already done all the hard paperwork & decisions long before ONE FALL made her dependent on me overnight! Many less than ethical experiences were unable to take advantage of her while she had no diagnosis or unknown diagnosis bc we were already a team. The only thing I wish I had known… is to be on her medical team in the loop before medicines left her malnourished and prone or vulnerable to falls. I might have caught the meds she was on too long and I would’ve known when her meds were doubled to look out for changes that were FROM the medicines. While on these meds, the person who looses blood from the brain to faint or fall CANNOT remember anything, much less THINK or problem solve. If you have no one or no one you trust JOURNAL and have video or recordings!

Thank you so much for sharing your caregiver journey ❤

Well I just found your stage 5 and commented… 11/20/24 mom left the house at 3 am in PJs and socks… much of 2024 especially after April 2024 was sooo very hard ESPECIALLY if you can even believe this… she had NO DEMENTIA DIAGNOSIS, I was not believed or Florida protects seniors etc… I have been my moms caregiver for 8 years after a traumatic head injury / concussion it was overnight short term memory loss and adult life memory lost from 1/17/2018 and by 6/2021 noticeable verbal communication decline into loops by 8/28/2021 her mom who was 96 and her own issues passed and 6 weeks her son, my brother had a heart attack at her doctors office because he was there helping me with her, my only sibling died at 39…. So, when she left the house I told them to take her as I had not even had a break from it all for 3 years…. She was IMMEDIATELY diagnosed with dementia FINALLY! She also has had lifelong untreated anxiety, depression, and now unstable mood and 2024 was her insomnia gone nuts. Absolutely EVERYTHING was diagnosed!! And I had a 6 day break. Mom is my last close family member and when I was a single parent, she was my co-parent… God has helped me stay sane all along and now she’s on a better schedule so we can sleep normally again snd get help from content creators on what is possibly the road ahead. Sooo far, mom’s already showing some of these stage 6 things that landed her into the hospital receiving treatment. She’s not ever been normal dementia bc it began 4 years after a time of falling at least 2 were actual concussions.

You came up after Teepa Snow! Soo glad bc my mom is or has past (stage 5) just like your MOM (not similar to Mother in law) and it is every traumatic thing is just POURING out and she also is no longer sweet much of the time! Thank you, Thank you for sharing this! This is soo helpful and I have subscribed!

Mil 85yo was dx alz.. but onlyhas mem loss no other issues.. when will she progress to next stage

I think my mom is in stage 7 and she has just recently stop all food and liquid she won't even let us feed her she just refuses im gonna have to put her in hospice care she lost alot of weight.

I’m so sorry your Mom was in terrible pain!! I’m just starting with my Mother’s diagnosis in Sept 2024.

I need to begin cleaning out spare bedrooms at my moms and I’m not sure what to tell her as to why…. Clearing out for when she’ll need more help.

Great vid..lotta info not always presented..thank you..!

I work for Best Buy answering calls, and a large number of callers are elderly people who have some type of cognitive decline. It's really crappy when I have to get off the phone asap since I'm in sales and obviously can't sell them something.

Thank you for sharing

My mom has a hard time letting go of having too many clothes, shoes, jewelry; irresponsible with money; doesn't comprehend simple things, even though she remembers times when people hurt her; blames others for her mistakes; can't find something she just held.

@Life under Deborah’s palm …. I think my mom is stage 4…. I need to clean out a bedroom at my mom’s for her future care when needs someone over night. Do I tell her why we are cleaning out the room?? She is terrified of Alzheimer’s, but has been diagnosed. I want to discuss future care with her, but am leery to making her upset. Idk what to do.

yeah, my mom has visual processing issues, and also doesn't have a way to choose what's more important to look at and pay attention to. So my mom can read the words ( although that varies), but if you have her look for specific information all she can do is read whatever she happens to be looking at on the page in no particular order - she can't choose the Title or a list or whatever.

the Montreal Cognitive Assessment was the first cognitive test that I was given, when I finally had a doctor to actually consider that I was actually having cognitive problems. Score was "normal". Second time I was slow on words that start with a particular letter and I called a table a desk. Just enough wrong that I was refered for full neurocognitive assessment which included two hour interview and later three hours of cognitive tests. And after that, I've had many tests that are in between in length. They're not all as sensitive at catching non-alzheimers cognitive impairment. I may do quite well on the shorter tests, or I have missed things. But, only the full test with some on computer is able to pick up on my slow processing and a few other issues. I can literally get a "normal " score on a short test, but was in bottom 2 and 5 percent for my age and education in several areas. the short tests have their screaning value, but if you think there is a problem, a normal score doesn't rule it out - even if they tell you that you/they are normal or fine. Also, some patients like me, learn to do better on the short tests. So, I would consider not trying to administer the test myself in advance to someone who will be given a test by a doctor.

I appreciate all of the great advice in your videos. Bathing and washing her hair is a major issue. She got mad at me once and purposely flooded our bathroom when I went on a business trip by stopping up the sink and overflow area, then leaving the bathroom with the sink running for hours. I don’t understand the anger and why she focuses that anger on me. Thanks again for your words. I’ll continue to listen to more of the ones you have posted.

n

Maybe Dad got lost for 2 hours 5 years prior to a diagnosis... or maybe he wanted some time alone. My dad used to disappear at times.

👏👏👏 Hi Deborah I literally just came across your channel vlogs this evening and have now watched them all. Thank you so much for taking the time to record and explain the dementia journey of your beloved mother. R.I.P. ❤ Your account is simply the best nuggets of information to help others navigate these heartbreaking stages. My mother [88] is currently living with dementia and we are walking in your steps, grieving her as she sits in front of us whilst striving to help make her life easier and bring a smile to her face. Thank you for this insightful body of work. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This video has been incredibly helpful

My mom NEVER thinks and has never thought she had anything wrong with her memory. It’s always someone else’s fault. It’s maddening

🙏 My father just passed at 93 brain totally fine. My mother is 92. When I got back home I couldn’t believe how quickly she declined. I took her to the doctor and told him she has dementia. Well she is in stage 4. I can’t believe he just tested her because I let him know she has dementia. My mom has worked for some of the premier doctors at the Houston medical center. One the doctors in the practice knew her and well it was hi and by~ thanks for stopping by and paying the toll. I don’t know how I’m going to pull this off. I need to take her back to Arizona. I pray that this “system” changes. 🙏

I really appreciate and understand your attitude concerning the loss of your Mother. Here I worried that I would have not mourn when I loose Momma because I am so tired of the abuse from her. I’ve already gotten her funeral and transportation for the funeral already planned and paid for.

I’m listening to your videos on Facebook and understanding more and more of what I have noticed with my momma. We had to move her in with my family because she had been financially and medically abused/neglected by another family member. Your information makes more sense upside what I am experiencing with Momma. The only thing what I can’t explain or understands is the abuse she gives me constantly. I don’t get in some conversations because I know it’s heading towards arguments. She voices happiness with others but cusses and calls me abusive names. I will continue to listen to your videos because I believe I need help and guidance. My husband provides most of the care that Momma needs, including getting her to take her meds. When I have given her the meds she needs to take, she will eventually take the meds and then throw the small medicine cup at me. 😢

Exactly the order of things my mom has gone through. Late stage 5 right now.

My Grammy (who is my mom's mom and who turns 84 on Saturday) is most likely going to need to move to assisted living and then memory Care in the next few months, or even year. I don't know how to feel about this, because I don't really know of the kind of care that I can expect and the people in there. I keep reading about how dementia patients are often forgotten about. I don't want that for my grandma.

My wife of 45 years was recently diagnosed with dementia (Alzheimer's). She's 63 years old so this is considered early onset and her rate of decline in the past year has been rapid. I recognized something was wrong and began seeking medical evaluation and help about 14 months ago. I found your channel through a YT search and have started watching your videos from the first one you recorded hoping to learn from your experience. I appreciate you sharing.

Thank you for this. I’m sorry for your loss🙏🏻. I just finished pre planning my mom’s funeral and final resting place. Everything is in place, which has brought me peace. She is stage 5, and the quality of her life is not great. You are absolutely right, it’s death by a thousand paper cuts and we experience that loss with them day by day.

Allowing closed captioning would have helped me a lot. 😊