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My long-term depression is best described as complete and utter hopelessness. ❤️❤️

Good job! I tried to post a link to a video intro, but guess i am not allowed. So, please google "Swankie, Nomadland"

My husband was the Storekeeper for Whigbey Island Naval Air Station. Maintained all the parts for repairing the planes.

Railroad spikes.

You are safe inside vehicle in lightening storm.

My husband was Sherriff on Whigbey Island, in Coupville (we were not married at the time). Was also stationed at Naval Air Station there too!

th-cam.com/video/gEVL9SYI8EY/w-d-xo.htmlsi=k97TlQZBGSIagCBt

I would like to kayak there! Crater Lake.

The Pacific Crest Trail goes by there. Have a photo of my son and dau-in-law there. They now have 2 teens (boy and girl). He hiked the PCT as thru hike from MX to Canada.

16 years doing just what you are doing, never got lucky enough to see a bear.

Never buy chick clothes or boots.

First time i asked for bear.spray in a sporting good store, clerks laughed at me. Guess they didnt think it necessary.

Funny story! Granddaughter, 3. Our first camping trip, first stop at vault toilet. I went. Then i helped her get ready! She took one look at that hole, and said "i don't need to go now!"

Knees are tricky. Some damage cant be fixed. I have a great knee dr in Kirkland, WA if you are ever up that way. He gave me back my life.

You are very good with camera.

Jesus is a revelation that is revealed from Heaven. The key to downloading this understanding is to humble ourselves and ask God. Birdie, you are in the perfect position to receive this revelation! We must come to Him as little children ready to be taught and not assume to know anything. My revelation came when I asked Jesus why He said that He was THE way, THE truth, and THE life and no one comes to the Father except through Him when there were so many other religions out there that seemed peaceful and good, like Buddhist monks, for instance. The Lord then asked me a question in my spirit that opened the windows of Heaven in my heart! He asked me to give Him a greater expression of love than grace. Right then and there, I knew that there was no greater expression or definition of love than grace, and that Jesus was the Spirit of grace manifested in the flesh, and that He was and is the Highest power in the universe, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords and that the Bible was true! No religion offers grace! Religion is based upon our goodness and our works, but trusting in and believing the written word of God and the testimony of Jesus Christ is about trusting in His finished work and what He did for us! I, too started out my journey reading Conversations with God, but what I have learned after having the revelation of Jesus Christ is that He IS the Word of God (John 1:1). This is what it means to worship God in spirit and in truth. We hear God's voice, but there is another deceptive voice that aims at misleading us. The Word of God is the compass and anchor that gives us the ability to discern between the two. If the voice aligns with the Holy Bible it is from God, if it doesn't, it is from our enemy. That doubt that crept into your heart during 911 was the voice (or fiery dart) of the enemy aimed to rob you of your joy and peace and faith. This is why the Bible says to arm ourselves with the whole armor of God to be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. This is why we need to meditate in the Holy Bible to arm ourselves with the Word of Truth! Because you had read, but hadn't yet studied and believed the Holy Bible, you had nothing to counter the devils lies with. The devil is like an archer looking for the unsuspecting souls to shoot his fiery darts( thoughts of fear, doubt, and unbelief into (the mind). We must be sober and vigilant, ready to counter these darts with the sword of the spirit which is the Word of God. Promises written in His word such as in Isaiah 54:17, "No weapon formed against you shall prosper!" These words must be spoken to cut off the enemies head and shut his lies down! Death and life are in the power of the tongue and they that love it shall eat its fruit (Proverbs 18:21) We were created in the image and likeness of God who spoke the world into existence. He has given us the power to speak and create as well. We can either agree with the Word of God and speak His promises over our lives, or we can come into agreement with the enemy and speak death and destruction over ourselves and others. Satan has no power over you other than to deceive you into believing and confessing his lies over yourself and others. His power is deception, he is known as the father of lies. There are realms that exists outside of what we can see, hear, and feel, and I have experienced one of them! At the lowest time of my life, I experienced that peace that surpasses all understanding. He isn't called the Prince of Peace for nothing! To be in His Presence is to be in perfect peace! It is amazing and other-worldy! When you are there, it is clear that this world is only a shadow of what's to come! It is amazing and He is amazing and His love for us is amazing and He's coming back to snatch us up out of this world very very soon! Fear not, believe only!!!!!❤❤❤ 14:04

I love how you enjoy the moment. If you ever get to the western slope of Coloado give me a shout. It's amazing here.

Thank you for sharing your story. I know people who struggle with depression. Your description has shed a better understanding of what one feels and lives with. I have a son and his mother both just hanging on. I am trying to help them as I was approached by the son. I WAS TOLD BY many other professionals that they've been like that for over 5 years we have helped once, and they just don't want help. I was told that there was no way to help them and not to try. EVERY LIFE has value. EVERY soul is loved. EVERYONE should have joy. I pray that you find peace in your soul, that your mourning will become dancing, that you come to peace with just being different, that you as you are is enough. You were not designed to complete someone else's puzzle. Too many people are forced to walkout their life according to a narrow misguided stipulation of society. You my dear, have been fearfully and beautifully designed. You are loved. There is peace and rest for your soul. In Christ. Talk to Jesus, he hears you. I thank you for sharing your story. I have a better understanding, and I will use that to help the man and his mother. Wherever you are, you can go online or call 2-1-1 for assistance of all types. Call 9-8-8 when hanging on is too hard, but you want to be here for your daughter. Much love and respect to you.

Your happiness is contagious.

🎉❤😂blow your own horn proudy girl I think your so much happier.love from Australia I am glad I have an update in real time .wow the places you have been are so 😍😊 Keep doing what you are doing it's made you 😁

what a pretty place! Thank you for sharing all the little details, especially the animals, and sunsets. 🌅 I love you Birdie!! Stay safe. 💕

Oh, precious, I’m so sorry for all you go through. I wish I could give you a hug. You are more than enough. 😢❤🤗

The wilderness and the road and the nomad community will help you heal. I was there 2 years ago and felt many of the same feelings. I camped with Bob for a few seasons before he began RTR.

I didn’t make it to Quartzsite last season, but on my way there for 2024-25 season. So glad you got there!

You realize you could write a book... and get income from it?😂

Bob Wells was thr first vandweller i met and camped with in 2009. He helped me cut a whole in roof of my van. He posted that story on cheaprvliving. You had a rough start.

Look at all your comments! You have created your own little family of caring people who understand. I began vandwelling in 2009, just because it was too difficult to try and be the person everyone wanted me to be. I searched for a goal bigger than myself to distract me from that depression. Ended up learning to kayak and kayaking all 50 states, just to keep from dwelling on my depression. Still a nomad, but also have that dream of a bit a land away frim people, with a garden and a few chickens. So, i do understand.

Do you ever gather with other vandwellers?

Do you ever gather with other vandwellers?

I can really relate! Thank you

Thank you for being brave enough to share your information.

❤and your such a sweet heart with nature I really love that in you 😊

Glad your still having a great time .from Australia

I wish you would come back into my feed again. You're my favorite!

Every day is hard

The ANGELS will look after you . I just want you to finally get your own home so you can rest and have companionship.Luv you my sweet dear!

I drove that exact place and farther up the road, I saw a deer get hit. I was devastated!

Thank you for sharing ❤ Yep Mount Everest. Every moment of every day. Beyond exhausting. But keep focusing on the small blessings, I try to do this and I know how hard it is. And yes, things could be better but can also be worse. Constant fear and anxiety and self-doubt is beyond debilitating. I get it. Totally.

Thank you for sharing❤

That crow was cussin' you OUT! 😂😂😂😂

Thank you for your Story Time! I Love and Admire your blatant Honesty! Im certain im not alone when i say Please do more Story Time videos, i enjoyed it. God bless you, safe travels

WOW! Gorgeous views of Crater Lake. If you wanna see something alien, go to Mono Lake, South Tufa exit, which is south of Lake Tahoe & not far from June Lake & the east gate of Yosemite. ❤

You are the best!

Thank you so much for this video. This is my partner right now. I’ve experienced mental health issues myself. I had a full breakdown in 2009. Thought I knew it all. Watching your video really opened my eyes to how she may be feeling. Thank you xxx

crescent City is the town I grew up in. I live in Virginia now. It's nice to see Crescent City getting more content on TH-cam. The foghorn has been changed from the sound I grew up with. At first it annoys you, then it helps you fall asleep. I hope to make it back there to fill my own videos of all the great places there are in that county and as well as recount some of the crazy stuff I did growing up there. If you ever want to know some meat places to visit in the county just let me know..

Birdie, you are so hard on yourself. I know it’s hard to see yourself out of stuff that feels “normal” to you but you were so failed by others. You were just a kid being groomed by adult male pedophiles. I am glad you are in a different place now. ❤

Knew a girl my guy friends nicknamed “Hairy Toes”. Glad you took care of that problem. Keep sharing your experiences. 🚐🚐🚐

Thank you for saving the little deer! I totally would have done the same thing!

We love the singing - keep singing & keeping zany and deliciously lovely

Just exactly the trip I needed today❤