Mom of two here as well - my son is 2.5 and my daughter is 5 weeks. What have helped me IMMENSELY is the book "hunt, gather, parent". Here I learned that we don't have to do child-centered things all the time. Of course I sit down to do a puzzle with my son when I feel like it, or play cars with him, or take him to a playground, or to the library. But it doesn't have to be about him ALL day EVERY day. I thought it had to. I thought I had to fill my days with things I didn't care about myself in order to keep my toddler happy and feeling loved. But the book taught me that I can make him feel happy and loved by including him in MY stuff instead. So now we empty the dishwasher together, we bake buns together, we vacuum together, we go in the garden together. And he's happy, I'm happy, and stuff gets done. Or when he comes to ask me to play something with him and I'm in the middle of something else. Then I tell him "I would love to play -cars- with you as soon as I have finished doing this". He understands, and he doesn't get mad. I also include him when we go to shop groceries. He gets to pull the basket or push the stroller if they have a child-sized one. He gets to pick the perfect tomato, or what pack of buns we are getting. And if we do small transactions at the bakery or similarly, I give him the money to pay with. It has gone from "how the heck do I get these days to pass by, and how do I deal with him when he's so difficult!" to "this is easy, he's so helpful, I wish I had more of him!".
@@sannemadsen6815 thank you for sharing this!!! Ive had this book on my list…. Now I have to read it! I read “how the eskimos keep their babies warm” and that helped me make that shift. So many moms today are lead to believe that we have to PLAY ALL DAY.. which just drains us. I really appreciate you sharing your journey. I hope you enjoyed this video and will stick around my channel ❤️
I loved this book also. I wish I had read it when my son was tiny. I centered everything around him and as a result as he got older, he required my presence for his entertainment. Now he is a teenager and I have the hardest time getting him to help around the house. I know that if I had included him more in my stuff and responsibilities, he’d be much more independent and helpful now. Don’t get me wrong though, he is a great kid and he helps when I need him to, he just doesn’t volunteer those services. Lol
@@Raven-wr7qv I was giggling a little as you said he doesn't volunteer those services... Wouldn't parenting be so much easier if they did!!! haha I resonate with this so much, although my oldest is only 4.. she needs WAY more of my attention than my 2 year old and I believe this is partly why. Thanks for sharing ❤
Listening while I cuddle my newborn and drinking tea while husband is taking a walk with my other two. My favorites are micro moments, intentional meal times, and reading with my kids. What a gem of a channel I found! Thanks for being authentic, it feels like I’m listening to a friend.
I am just grinning from ear to ear. Thank you so much for this comment. I always hope that moms feel like they are just sitting in my living room with me. I appreciate you being here.. and I hope you will continue finding value in my channel ❤
I’ve had many jobs starting from age 15, and this is literally the hardest job, being a mom, and I only have one. The men have it Easy at work comparatively
I do agree that motherhood is one of the hardest jobs.. although I think our husband's have more weight and pressure on their shoulders as well. When we look back at hunter gatherer societies, we see that men and women had equal work/leisure, but this was because they had a village of people to help them raise their family. It seems like husbands today are being required to not only provide for the family financially, but also to step into the role of the village their family is missing. It's definitely not easy or simple for families to thrive these days! Thanks for sharing ❤
I never felt motherhood was hard. Rarely ever had a babysitter, spotless house. I had 3 girls. Watching great grandkids now ,twins. Some are cutout for it some don't I suppose. Best advice from me is think long and hard before you have kids. I also handled all the bills and all Dr visits and a husband who had a heart attack at 32 and many hospital's and surgeries. Finally realized that I was doing better than I gave myself credit for.
@@Joyce-id3dr Thanks for sharing this!! I wish I could go back and parent during a much simpler time. Gosh today, life isn't quite as simple. Thanks for being here.. enjoy those great grand children ❤
@@Joyce-id3dr I love this question! From my perspective, after talking with my parents and grandparents, Social Media has put so much pressure on our generation. My mother… her mother… and so on.. they trusted their motherly intuition. After 2 NICU babies, I truly felt like I was doing everything wrong. All the experts knew better. Although I’m a research junkie… and believe it can be such a blessing.. I do believe in a mother’s innate ability to mother. Thats why I often do social media fasts/detox because it can be too much noise. Thanks for asking! ❤️
My kids are just under 2 years apart too!!! That season was one of the hardest. I'm so glad you enjoyed this video and I hope that it encourages you in your journey as a stay at home mama ❤
Stay at home momma of 2 under 3 and a newish TH-camr. I really relate to this video.. especially with the meal time portion. I always eat before my kids because I wake up earlier than them.. but I think eating breakfast and lunch together would be so beneficial.
I love this!! And congratulations on starting your channel.. it's beautiful to have a creative outlet for yourself!! I can so easily get into productive mode and lean towards what's easier instead of what will benefit our entire family. Meal times feel like the easiest place to start. Let me know how it goes ❤
Our kids are 6 and almost 9 years old, I’ve been a stay at home mom with them for the past almost 7 years & im feeling reeeeeally burned out after the past week of sickness & now they’re on Thanksgiving break for another 8 days 😂❤ I love them so much!! But I can only hear the word “Mommy” so many times in a day 😂 no close family around to help me so it’s been me all the time. Plus 2 new adorable kitties & a big needy Great Pyrenees dog 😇🥰 I paint my nails like twice a year now! Haha but I do get my roots colored every 8 weeks or so
I'm sorry I didn't see this sooner!!!! Gosh, I hope your thanksgiving break is going well... and isn't too chaotic. Sickness and times of stress are hard. This is when it's easiest for our brains to revert back to old patterns because that feels safe and comfortable. Thanks for sharing... and I appreciate you being here ❤️
This is very Heartwarming and very wonderful and very beautiful and very adorable and very helpful and this brings back such great memories of when I use to be a 90s kid and an early 2000s kid and I am a new subscriber as well:).
Loved this episode. I am a Mama Five and I am also in the process of just China be more in the thriving season versus being so overwhelmed. Just found your channel too by your conversation that you’re from Pacific Northwest as well small world.
I just read one of the responses in the comments section and wanted to respond. I agree that your pace is fast, but people are all different. I can understand that some would prefer to look for a more relaxed zen vibe, but personally I prefer to engage with mums who are authentic and not over curated. Making these videos are also your time to express yourself passionately. (My personal mum experience leads me to believe that you wouldn't necessarily get a chance to do this in your day to day life) Not that you were planning to out anything...but I feel that changing your style to better cater for others at the expense of adding to your workload or acting inauthenticity might reduce the joy this brings you. You are doing great.
Thank you so much!!! There can be so much noise here.. I'm really trying to trust my gut and intuition as I create content going forward. I do believe the pace of my conversations are authentically me.. and I don't plan on trying to make any changes there hahah.. more or less that would be a lot of thought 😉 Anyways, I appreciate your thoughts and opinion and I hope you continue to enjoy my content in the future :)
Just found your channel and wow did I need this ❤️ after having my second I’ve had a really hard time having a rhythm and simple things like reading to my second! I’ve been in a bit of a rut lately so going to implement some of these things ❤
I'm so glad you are here and have found encouragement in my videos. ❤ It's so normal to get into a rut and sometimes we just need a friend to remind of how to get back out! Thank you for sharing this.. I hope you find a gentle rhythm that brings you and your family peace 😊
This came at the perfect time. I have a 17 year old, a 1 year old and am due with baby #3 next month. I’ve been so worried about my 1 year old feeling ignored when baby 3 comes that I’ve been heaping extra attention on her and trying to get her as prepared as possible. I don’t think she understands that she is going to be a big sister in 6 weeks or less, but I am doing my best. Do you have any advice on how to best transition from Mom of 1 toddler to a Mom of toddler and newborn? What are some things I can do now to help prepare not only my toddler for the change, but set things up for myself to be a successful present and not totally stressed and neurotic Mama? Any advice is appreciated. Lol
First of all, thank you for sharing this. I appreciate your openness and desire to be prepared. I also had 2 under 2 and was so nervous about the transition. What I've learned is we can prepare ALLLLL the things and somehow the transition is still tricky and an adjustment when adding another baby to the family. My best advice is to prep as much food as you can.. throw a Postpartum Meal Prep Party for extra help. Have a calming basket.. with new things for your one year old. This came in handy when they were both crying and I was struggling to soothe them both. Have very low expectations. I feel like it took my oldest over a year to finally accept and also enjoy her little sister. Lastly, start practicing micro moments for yourself.. acknowledge them and notice them. This was how I survived the whole 2 under 2 thing hahah. Hope this helped in some way ❤
Society is literally so crazy today that we need someone to remind us, “hey life hack! Eat some food when you’re hungry!” Lol. So accurate yet so silly that any time someone tells me this, it’s like a brand new revelation.
What can the grandparents possibly be busy with other than spending time and teaching their grandkids? Step it up grandparents! Mine were very involved and I’m so grateful!
my kids have 4 living grandparents. 3 are so self absorbed and narcissistic they choose to not see the kids (hell, 2 of them dont ever ask about the kids and have zero comminication really). 1 cares, but lives 1500 miles away. my kids get about 5 days a year with her on average. they're all retired.
Grandparents today are more than often working. Within my community of mamas, it's rare to find grandparents who can be the village their children and grandchildren really need. I don't believe that this was how we were intended to live as humans, but it's also our reality. So, my hope is to help mommas find a way to thrive in motherhood.. despite the time we live in ❤
My 72 year old dad still occasionally works, my mom is 60 with a rare autoimmune disease and cares for my grandmother who lives about an hour for them, and she takes care of all my aunt’s stage 4 cancer needs, including having her live with my parents, all paperwork, and drives her at least once a month 5 hours to MD Anderson to stay in a hotel for days. My daddy died but was mentally and financially unstable. My husband’s mom is schizophrenic and bipolar and not allowed alone with our children due to what she did to my husband as a child, his dad was injured as a paramedic and now can’t lift anything and barely can walk and his wife works two jobs to make ends meet (plus we had a 5 year falling out with them). Most people with young kids that I know have very similar stories and we don’t have babysitters and all homeschool.
My parents are enjoying their retirement by traveling. They raised their kids already. I do wish they were around more often to help here and there but it’s not their responsibility
Your such a wise mama. Great Advice I been doing little dates with a couple of children at a time .I am a older mom now with 7 living children ( eldest passed on in 2019) I find your tips so helpful even though we are outnumbered by boys 😊 I am neurodivergent with sensory impairment...Thank You so much! ❤😊❤❤❤❤❤May The Most High continue to bless you and keep you! 😊
@@Amgirl03 This is such a compliment coming from an experienced mama. THANK YOU!!!! I love this idea of little dates. I need to get back in the habit of taking my kids separately from time to time. Hope you enjoy my channel ❤️
Ur talking about a very sensitive topic affecting many women which can be triggering. Then u are speaking fast bcoz u are passionate. We feel the tension bcoz we are victims of this. Then the background music is very fast. So all in all, it's not good for the sensory overload that we are all feeling. This video will be very informative for me but I can't play it bcoz it is stressing me out further. I stopped watching on the 29th second. Hope this feedback helps you x
@@12Samsung12 thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback. I do know that I’m talking about a sensitive topic. As a certified parent coach, I do not take any of this lightly. I’m sorry the music music and my voice was triggering. Praying you to find the calm and peace you need mama ❤️
I can't relate to how you feel about her video, but you may want to try to adjust the playback speed. Playing it slower may be helpful for you personally if slower would be more calming or help you take in her messages better ❤
![Slow[ish] Parenting](http://yt3.ggpht.com/QpSUXbpAAFMwgpx3eOBExnw6MqyySxawD1KyUSOYgwkhld8uY2FbcZsDdk0tMiBgJ0rgCoP8FQ=s48-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj)
Mom of two here as well - my son is 2.5 and my daughter is 5 weeks. What have helped me IMMENSELY is the book "hunt, gather, parent". Here I learned that we don't have to do child-centered things all the time. Of course I sit down to do a puzzle with my son when I feel like it, or play cars with him, or take him to a playground, or to the library. But it doesn't have to be about him ALL day EVERY day. I thought it had to. I thought I had to fill my days with things I didn't care about myself in order to keep my toddler happy and feeling loved. But the book taught me that I can make him feel happy and loved by including him in MY stuff instead. So now we empty the dishwasher together, we bake buns together, we vacuum together, we go in the garden together. And he's happy, I'm happy, and stuff gets done. Or when he comes to ask me to play something with him and I'm in the middle of something else. Then I tell him "I would love to play -cars- with you as soon as I have finished doing this". He understands, and he doesn't get mad. I also include him when we go to shop groceries. He gets to pull the basket or push the stroller if they have a child-sized one. He gets to pick the perfect tomato, or what pack of buns we are getting. And if we do small transactions at the bakery or similarly, I give him the money to pay with.
It has gone from "how the heck do I get these days to pass by, and how do I deal with him when he's so difficult!" to "this is easy, he's so helpful, I wish I had more of him!".
@@sannemadsen6815 thank you for sharing this!!! Ive had this book on my list…. Now I have to read it! I read “how the eskimos keep their babies warm” and that helped me make that shift. So many moms today are lead to believe that we have to PLAY ALL DAY.. which just drains us. I really appreciate you sharing your journey. I hope you enjoyed this video and will stick around my channel ❤️
Thanks for this advice!
I loved this book also. I wish I had read it when my son was tiny. I centered everything around him and as a result as he got older, he required my presence for his entertainment. Now he is a teenager and I have the hardest time getting him to help around the house. I know that if I had included him more in my stuff and responsibilities, he’d be much more independent and helpful now. Don’t get me wrong though, he is a great kid and he helps when I need him to, he just doesn’t volunteer those services. Lol
@@Raven-wr7qv I was giggling a little as you said he doesn't volunteer those services... Wouldn't parenting be so much easier if they did!!! haha I resonate with this so much, although my oldest is only 4.. she needs WAY more of my attention than my 2 year old and I believe this is partly why. Thanks for sharing ❤
Listening while I cuddle my newborn and drinking tea while husband is taking a walk with my other two. My favorites are micro moments, intentional meal times, and reading with my kids. What a gem of a channel I found! Thanks for being authentic, it feels like I’m listening to a friend.
I am just grinning from ear to ear. Thank you so much for this comment. I always hope that moms feel like they are just sitting in my living room with me. I appreciate you being here.. and I hope you will continue finding value in my channel ❤
I’ve had many jobs starting from age 15, and this is literally the hardest job, being a mom, and I only have one. The men have it Easy at work comparatively
I do agree that motherhood is one of the hardest jobs.. although I think our husband's have more weight and pressure on their shoulders as well. When we look back at hunter gatherer societies, we see that men and women had equal work/leisure, but this was because they had a village of people to help them raise their family. It seems like husbands today are being required to not only provide for the family financially, but also to step into the role of the village their family is missing. It's definitely not easy or simple for families to thrive these days! Thanks for sharing ❤
I never felt motherhood was hard. Rarely ever had a babysitter, spotless house. I had 3 girls. Watching great grandkids now ,twins. Some are cutout for it some don't I suppose. Best advice from me is think long and hard before you have kids. I also handled all the bills and all Dr visits and a husband who had a heart attack at 32 and many hospital's and surgeries. Finally realized that I was doing better than I gave myself credit for.
@@Joyce-id3dr Thanks for sharing this!! I wish I could go back and parent during a much simpler time. Gosh today, life isn't quite as simple. Thanks for being here.. enjoy those great grand children ❤
@@slowishparenting Why do you think it was a simpler time? Same world, same problems, same good times and bad.
@@Joyce-id3dr I love this question! From my perspective, after talking with my parents and grandparents, Social Media has put so much pressure on our generation. My mother… her mother… and so on.. they trusted their motherly intuition. After 2 NICU babies, I truly felt like I was doing everything wrong. All the experts knew better. Although I’m a research junkie… and believe it can be such a blessing.. I do believe in a mother’s innate ability to mother. Thats why I often do social media fasts/detox because it can be too much noise. Thanks for asking! ❤️
As a sahm of a 2 year old and a 4 months old, I love and relate to this so much!!
My kids are just under 2 years apart too!!! That season was one of the hardest. I'm so glad you enjoyed this video and I hope that it encourages you in your journey as a stay at home mama ❤
I have a 2yo and a 4mo and YA GIRL IS BLESSED AND TIRED.😅
@@sabl6381 goodness!! Your heart must be so full ❤️❤️ I remember these days so vividly. Hang in there mama ❤️
Stay at home momma of 2 under 3 and a newish TH-camr. I really relate to this video.. especially with the meal time portion. I always eat before my kids because I wake up earlier than them.. but I think eating breakfast and lunch together would be so beneficial.
I love this!! And congratulations on starting your channel.. it's beautiful to have a creative outlet for yourself!! I can so easily get into productive mode and lean towards what's easier instead of what will benefit our entire family. Meal times feel like the easiest place to start. Let me know how it goes ❤
You really are the best!!! I love your videos.
Thank you ❤❤
Our kids are 6 and almost 9 years old, I’ve been a stay at home mom with them for the past almost 7 years & im feeling reeeeeally burned out after the past week of sickness & now they’re on Thanksgiving break for another 8 days 😂❤ I love them so much!! But I can only hear the word “Mommy” so many times in a day 😂 no close family around to help me so it’s been me all the time. Plus 2 new adorable kitties & a big needy Great Pyrenees dog 😇🥰 I paint my nails like twice a year now! Haha but I do get my roots colored every 8 weeks or so
I'm sorry I didn't see this sooner!!!! Gosh, I hope your thanksgiving break is going well... and isn't too chaotic. Sickness and times of stress are hard. This is when it's easiest for our brains to revert back to old patterns because that feels safe and comfortable. Thanks for sharing... and I appreciate you being here ❤️
This is very Heartwarming and very wonderful and very beautiful and very adorable and very helpful and this brings back such great memories of when I use to be a 90s kid and an early 2000s kid and I am a new subscriber as well:).
Thanks so much for being here :)
Loved this episode. I am a Mama Five and I am also in the process of just China be more in the thriving season versus being so overwhelmed. Just found your channel too by your conversation that you’re from Pacific Northwest as well small world.
Oh how cool is this!! This made me smile so much. I'm glad you are here and I really hope that you enjoy my little community ❤
I just read one of the responses in the comments section and wanted to respond.
I agree that your pace is fast, but people are all different. I can understand that some would prefer to look for a more relaxed zen vibe, but personally I prefer to engage with mums who are authentic and not over curated.
Making these videos are also your time to express yourself passionately.
(My personal mum experience leads me to believe that you wouldn't necessarily get a chance to do this in your day to day life)
Not that you were planning to out anything...but I feel that changing your style to better cater for others at the expense of adding to your workload or acting inauthenticity might reduce the joy this brings you.
You are doing great.
Thank you so much!!! There can be so much noise here.. I'm really trying to trust my gut and intuition as I create content going forward. I do believe the pace of my conversations are authentically me.. and I don't plan on trying to make any changes there hahah.. more or less that would be a lot of thought 😉 Anyways, I appreciate your thoughts and opinion and I hope you continue to enjoy my content in the future :)
Just found your channel and wow did I need this ❤️ after having my second I’ve had a really hard time having a rhythm and simple things like reading to my second! I’ve been in a bit of a rut lately so going to implement some of these things ❤
I'm so glad you are here and have found encouragement in my videos. ❤ It's so normal to get into a rut and sometimes we just need a friend to remind of how to get back out! Thank you for sharing this.. I hope you find a gentle rhythm that brings you and your family peace 😊
This came at the perfect time. I have a 17 year old, a 1 year old and am due with baby #3 next month. I’ve been so worried about my 1 year old feeling ignored when baby 3 comes that I’ve been heaping extra attention on her and trying to get her as prepared as possible. I don’t think she understands that she is going to be a big sister in 6 weeks or less, but I am doing my best. Do you have any advice on how to best transition from Mom of 1 toddler to a Mom of toddler and newborn? What are some things I can do now to help prepare not only my toddler for the change, but set things up for myself to be a successful present and not totally stressed and neurotic Mama? Any advice is appreciated. Lol
First of all, thank you for sharing this. I appreciate your openness and desire to be prepared. I also had 2 under 2 and was so nervous about the transition. What I've learned is we can prepare ALLLLL the things and somehow the transition is still tricky and an adjustment when adding another baby to the family. My best advice is to prep as much food as you can.. throw a Postpartum Meal Prep Party for extra help. Have a calming basket.. with new things for your one year old. This came in handy when they were both crying and I was struggling to soothe them both. Have very low expectations. I feel like it took my oldest over a year to finally accept and also enjoy her little sister. Lastly, start practicing micro moments for yourself.. acknowledge them and notice them. This was how I survived the whole 2 under 2 thing hahah. Hope this helped in some way ❤
Society is literally so crazy today that we need someone to remind us, “hey life hack! Eat some food when you’re hungry!” Lol. So accurate yet so silly that any time someone tells me this, it’s like a brand new revelation.
hahah this had me cracking up!! I felt the same way when a mentor mentioned it to me. Thanks for commenting ❤
What can the grandparents possibly be busy with other than spending time and teaching their grandkids? Step it up grandparents! Mine were very involved and I’m so grateful!
my kids have 4 living grandparents. 3 are so self absorbed and narcissistic they choose to not see the kids (hell, 2 of them dont ever ask about the kids and have zero comminication really). 1 cares, but lives 1500 miles away. my kids get about 5 days a year with her on average. they're all retired.
Grandparents today are more than often working. Within my community of mamas, it's rare to find grandparents who can be the village their children and grandchildren really need. I don't believe that this was how we were intended to live as humans, but it's also our reality. So, my hope is to help mommas find a way to thrive in motherhood.. despite the time we live in ❤
My 72 year old dad still occasionally works, my mom is 60 with a rare autoimmune disease and cares for my grandmother who lives about an hour for them, and she takes care of all my aunt’s stage 4 cancer needs, including having her live with my parents, all paperwork, and drives her at least once a month 5 hours to MD Anderson to stay in a hotel for days. My daddy died but was mentally and financially unstable. My husband’s mom is schizophrenic and bipolar and not allowed alone with our children due to what she did to my husband as a child, his dad was injured as a paramedic and now can’t lift anything and barely can walk and his wife works two jobs to make ends meet (plus we had a 5 year falling out with them). Most people with young kids that I know have very similar stories and we don’t have babysitters and all homeschool.
Amen. Some are very selfish.
My parents are enjoying their retirement by traveling. They raised their kids already. I do wish they were around more often to help here and there but it’s not their responsibility
Your such a wise mama. Great Advice I been doing little dates with a couple of children at a time .I am a older mom now with 7 living children ( eldest passed on in 2019) I find your tips so helpful even though we are outnumbered by boys 😊 I am neurodivergent with sensory impairment...Thank You so much! ❤😊❤❤❤❤❤May The Most High continue to bless you and keep you! 😊
@@Amgirl03 This is such a compliment coming from an experienced mama. THANK YOU!!!! I love this idea of little dates. I need to get back in the habit of taking my kids separately from time to time. Hope you enjoy my channel ❤️
I'm gonna need an army of baskets! 😂
thank you
@@raneelong9408 you are so welcome! I hope you enjoyed ❤️
❤❤❤ thank you
@@kellyarmijo8293 absolutely! Thank you for being here ❤️
god bless you
@@patiaurelio1990 thank you so much ❤️ I hope you enjoy the video!
Ur talking about a very sensitive topic affecting many women which can be triggering.
Then u are speaking fast bcoz u are passionate. We feel the tension bcoz we are victims of this.
Then the background music is very fast.
So all in all, it's not good for the sensory overload that we are all feeling.
This video will be very informative for me but I can't play it bcoz it is stressing me out further. I stopped watching on the 29th second. Hope this feedback helps you x
@@12Samsung12 thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback. I do know that I’m talking about a sensitive topic. As a certified parent coach, I do not take any of this lightly. I’m sorry the music music and my voice was triggering. Praying you to find the calm and peace you need mama ❤️
Yikes 😅 I find no issues with the video at all!!
I think that's more of a you problem. You sound very stressed.
I can't relate to how you feel about her video, but you may want to try to adjust the playback speed. Playing it slower may be helpful for you personally if slower would be more calming or help you take in her messages better ❤