[SAGD] UnClassics of Military History
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Song: Ethan Meixsell - Demilitarized Zone
You have forgotten, at least for Germany:
Limited Submarine Warfare
Or how to NOT piss of America.
Know your strength
A guide to estimate on how many superpowers you can declare war on
Also:
Superweapons
Are they worth it?
For Japan:
The sleeping dragon. Not just China.
How to occupy a country.
Nanking Edition
Hilariuos
Aquila, that last one was savage
There's also
Comforting your Women: Japanese Edition.
A World War guide to good relationships.
"Loyality redifined" fucking great.
Well, Hitler kinda missed the book :"Dictatorships with Kings: why allying with them might be a bad idea".
You forgot one from the international category:"God is on Our Side" (available in 147 translations)
oooh, that is good one. I wish it was not printed. f c uking evill book isn 't it?
Ahh that one is a real classic.
Don't start a war without it!
Serously, the moment someone says it I call bull.
"It will be a short war" - Israel actually read it ...
JAJAJAJAJA good one
they had exceptionally good one obviously. that is uncommon.
To be fair it was something in the likes of a pre-declared terrorist attack or a raid.
I do think it deserves all the attention by military historians as much as a normal-ass-normal-war, but i wouldn't classify it as one.
Yeah, that war was odd on so many levels. One side has fighters, but no bombers. The other has terrible fighters, but once it gets bombers the war is pretty much over (likely having the bombers ended the war). One side tells the other *precisely* when they plan to invade. It gets better.
very good one :P
Japan also needs some credit:
How many nukes does it take to consider surrender (The Manga);
Industry and warfare for dummies (although it is embargoed)
Why not to tickle a sleeping bear, dragon and eagle at the same time.
Tickle? They trades a few punches with the bear, punched the dragon in the nuts, and tried to perform a Diving Elbow Drop on the eagle.
How to consider the length of war 101.
"You Only Get Six Months"
"Interservice Cooperation for Dummies: Imperial Japan Edition"
"Kantai Kessen Works: Deluxe Limited Edition, includes a 1:3000 scale floating hotel"
"How To Commit Warcrimes And Then Turn Them Into Cute Girls: 2010 Edition"
China: Unity while fighting off invaders 101
:D
North Korean has books too.
I recommend the
Military Financial Flexibility: Food is Over Rated Edition
pittsburghmcconnell You forgot the new books "How much Chinese troops really fought against the Imperialists?" and "Soviet Pilots: Were they in Korea?"
You forgot two important American ones:
How to properly test torpedoes.
and Now that the war is over who needs a military.
Actually their military spending dropped significantly after WWII, by Korean War, they now faced with mostly WWII equipment, and inexperience mean, although they later had better equipment but still a lot were from WWII.
That's what I was referring to with the "Now the war is over who needs a military"
You forgot the Dutch bestsellers:
A countries guide on military spending
How money can possibly be important to your army
Ammunition and such
A short guide on why yelling "pang pang" won't kill the enemy
And last but not least:
How to make a city stop burning
A book we wish we had before Rotterdam
What about "When in doubt, break the dams"?
Mike De Jong What about "Union Negotiations In War Time: Losing Minimal Ground While The Soldiers Strike".
You forgot a particularly underappreciated US book:"Friend & Foe: How to tell the difference" which appeared alongside "WMD spotting for dummies". Equally forgotten was the series of books "World Police". Particularly the parts "II. Choosing which dissidents to support", "VI. Successful Invasion. Now what?" and "XIV. Foresight: Thinking in the long term".
:D the friendly fire one was in my first draft, but my title was lame, so I left it out.
When talking about the US there would also be
* "101 shady but somewhat accepted reasons to join a war"
* "How to pretend you are helping"
* "War against Terror - How to secure "your" Oil and Gas wells"
* "How to: Get rid of head of states, once they are no longer cooperating" (was also sold under the title "Civil revolt - the near and middle east special")
* "How to use foreign engineers and old ideas and market them as US successes"
** EP.1: "The space race with Wernher von Braun"
** EP.2: "Stealth and flying wing planes with the Horton brothers"
the "Friend & Foe" on the top inspired me to do a follow up
* "Friend & Foe: What to do if terrorists forces change sides" (subtitle "Revenge of the Mujaheddin / AL-Qaeda")
Hahaha xDDD The boys will be home by christmas killed me ^^
(no disrespect to the soldiers)
Cosair killed a bunch of other people as well (about 17 million)
None taken...we joke about that one in every war.
My favorites: Kim jong un's book of diplomacy and The soviet travel guide to the Finnish democratic republic.
It lacked the mexican "How to lose half of your country in 2 easy battles"
i think denmark is co writer on that book.
You should read Bolivia's equivalent.
they were going to write it but they got distracted then took a nap
1905 France: "How to prepare naval doctrines against your future ally"
Thank you! I definitely needed a good laugh this morning. ;-) Other American editions might be, "Gun-shy hunting dogs: The U.S. Army at Kasserine Pass".
You missed out the Allied Bomber Commands' classic;
'Written by the Victors: The Pocket Guide to Carefree Firebombing'
You Forgot Japan.
They got a good guide : "Kamikazes : Ambitious but Rubbish"
Also "Nankin Who?"
And the best one : "Katana&Arisaka : Honorable Suicide Edition"
China DMCA'd the "Nanking Who" but Japan keeps on printing it in secret.
Todd Howard also wrote a book called "See that mountain? You can climb it" for the Italians and Indians
Actually, the Wehrmacht had a book prepared on Russian geography and climate in advance. Maybe they should have chosen a subtitle: "Why the Fuehrer's idea may need some more work put into it". They knew damn well what they were getting into. (Almost) All the problems they later encountered were anticipated in that guide.
Well, optimism is a double edged sword x)
That was pure and intense fun, thank you for making my day great again :D
Netherlands;
How to sit tight and hope it'll blow over like last time.
All Dutch were heroes during the nazi occupation - 1946 edition.
Join the Italian army on the Isonzo, they said. You'll home by Christmas, they said.
Australia has a few:
* Australian Army Backpackers Guidebook (World Guide)
* Cultural Sensitivity on the The Foreign Battlefield.
* Military Discipline: Does it Exist and Why Would You Care?
LOL- Yep vital reading. Let's not forget these 'un-Classics' too -
1939 - War in Europe...Again.
Revised December 1941 Edition with a new title - How To Negotiate Troop Redeployments With Difficult Allies For Localised Defence.
Apparently the latter had to be re-published with rude words removed. ;)
"How to be an effective ally" authored by Italy and ghost written by Romania.
Coup d'etat for dummies is a popular book in turkey lol
It's popular in the Arab world as well. I hear there is a sissi edition.
I hear there's a Hindi dialect edition.
Instructions unclear, penal battalion failed to take objective, sending in about 30 more.
What about the "How to invade the small banana republic Cuba", 1961 special edition, with preface of J.F. Kennedy,
and you must not forget, "How to kill Fidel Castro" CIA manuall. The last one is a bestseller.
Amidst the heavy laughs I somehow managed to notice a book was missing:
"How to win a war against all odds, but still lose all invaded land and money", by Helsinki Publishing, Inc.
You missed the one by Australia "How to effectively combat birds" 1932 edition
You forgot a japanese book: "Who needs radio guided bombs when you have human guidance"
how about that favorite British Classic "Drawing international boundaries "
The original Sykes-Picot 1916 edition or the 1947 revised reprint ?
There's also the 1932 revision, but it was poorly edited.
EDIT: fixed the typos. Seriously the errata of the 1932 edition is contagious!
Even the latest Kindle editions are full of errata...
Jim Heaton
Yeah, many of them just sort of carry on all the erratas of the previous editions.
Now you mention it, that could have been going on for ages...I dunno, a couple of thousand years, maybe?
I prefer "How to do a proper split" by Poland
You forgot the WW1 Classic: Not Even a Rat Can Survive This Barrage, A walking tour of the Somme.
I really wouldnt be suprised if half of them actually exist
The book on Russian geography and climate did exist and was prepared for the German military in advance of the invasion of Russia. I read parts of it and it was rather prescient.
Denmarks unknown book: Lost the War? try ten more times. Swedish edition
How to start a World War and blame Someone Else - Anschluss Edition
You got me really good with this one :D
But i think a lot of people don`t get it.
well, a lot of the editions and other stuff is "bonus" or should instill some curiosity, e.g., declaration of war: missing manual.
I about died laughing from this video, I love all your videos!!!
But what about Japan's:
"How to go from complete isolation to world power to really good at building cars in under 100 years."
"Poking the Bear 101"
and "Land Wars in China, Final Edition"
Another awesome video, MHV!
"Getting screwed by your allies." - book issued in september 1939.
"How to Start a War and Blame Someone Else: Anschluss Edition"
Basically every game of EU4 ever.
What about the British "how to correctly leave Europe"
You can buy the 1941 or the 2016 edition, though the 1941 edition is a family favourite.
The 1940 guide is also the British edition for "Reverse Gear and Rear Sight" with a city guide of Dunkirk
I LOLed everything, especially the Declaration of War, the Missing Manual by USA......
But i got stuck in france, any captain wanna explain the french part?
"How can you govern a country which has two hundred and forty-six varieties of cheese?" en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Charles_de_Gaulle
" Clementine Churchill, who admired de Gaulle, once cautioned him, "General, you must not hate your friends more than you hate your enemies." De Gaulle himself stated famously, "No Nation has friends, only interests."[36]" en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_de_Gaulle
+Military History Visualized they gouverne as always "DIVIDE et IMPERA" m'y friend, France is not an exception, However needs more subtle rule.....
The reverse gear and rear mirror guide is a collaborative french and british guide of the low countries in 1940. The brits censored it after Market Garden , however a supplement called "Gardening in Holland" was added
This guy a 9gagger?
Oh you forgot the two german classics:
Logistics for Dummies Vol I: How to supply an army by air in the russian winter (with a preface by Hermann Göring)
Logistics for Dummies Vol II: How to supply an army group over a sea that is controlled by the enemy
(Vol. II also available in Japanese!)
You skipped Bernard Law Montgomery's pamphlet: The Third Rule of War, subtitled "No more pencil-like thrusts"
So good! Daniel Taylor's books look like must-reads as well!
"..how to be an effective ally.." what a classic!
Belgians: How neutrality negates the belligerents strategy. 1936 (Second edition)
Brittain: The no-nonsense approach to idiots 1940
Books for Britain
- How to misplace Colonies - New world edition (also see British Raj edition)
-Fighting on the beaches (by Winston Churchill
-Getting your former colonies to help you in wars (available in Canadian, USA and ANZAC editions)
-950 years without invasions
The international bestsellers were great! The 'How to start a world war and blame someone else.' is excellent.
Love the video, here you go YT engagement algorithm i'm engaging to help a channel i like.
Is there going to be a christmas special with a wishlist of countries to invade? :p
Russia is missing one: "Don't fuck with the Finns" or maybe "Motti-vational speaking sucks"
I think you missed a pretty nice read from Germany called "Elementary and Intermediate Logistical Un-Wizardry: Rommel Edition"
lol boys will be back by Christmas. very dark humor indeed
Some for Britain:
How to quickly beat South African farmers (1900 series)
The Advantages of light horse over entrenched artillery
I Can't Believe It's Not Nepotism: The Benefits Of The Purchase System
Your humor is drier than mine and I often freak people out.
It lacked some British ones like:
Colonies: Which to tax more and when to start shooting
Gardening Markets: Holland Edition
I lost it at Anschluss Edition. These are hilarious.
In Brazil we have the "How World Wars can make your economy grow guide", the classic book by Prestes "The Long March, horseback edition" and the "How to make a coup, install a dictatorship with US help and blame Moscow guide" which is a true classic, given how many editions it has.
The Italian Book of War Heroes.
You forgot the French Special Forces manual... (how to say I surrender, in 6 different languages).
It's considered a mandatory prerequisite before reading "Political Problem Resolution threw Occupation by a Foreign Power" 1814, 1872 and 1940 editions.
Well , the armored guide for retreating is a Franco-British guide written during Dunkirk
germany :
how to have a well balanced navy that doesnt solely rely on trade interdiction
5 tips and tricks on how to invade france (#2 is invade belgium, the germans really like that one)
Britain :
escaping france (volumes i-x)
how to upgrade prewar ships
tea in sea (how to defeat rebelling colonists)
japan :
how to build boats (korean invasion addition)
how to build boats (ignore korean invasion addition)
The problem with the German navy was that it was *too* balanced. The battleships and cruisers were a distraction from building up their U-boat force early. The thing about surface navies is that half-measures are utterly worthless - if you can´t defeat the enemy navy, you might as well not try. Thus rendering their navy mosty worthless.
hjorturerlend but that surface fleet was absolutely poor. they got it perfect in ww1, but the navy wasn't big enough to fight britains navy, but in ww2, they should have had a better surface fleet. solely relying on trade interdiction creates a poor navy with a lack of control over the seas, but does create fear amongst the enemy fleet.
Darjeeling That all makes sense, if you take it out of context... But the context is - could the Germans, starting from 1933, build a surface navy big enough to actually *beat* the Royal Navy? The answer is a staggering no, even if they managed to build all their planned battleships and carriers, it still would not be nearly enough defeat the Royal Navy - so why bother? Just let the enemy navy rust in port.
The situation was almost the same during WW1 - the large, but still smaller, German battlefleet stayed in port for the entirety of the war, while the submarines were the only ones to see noticable action.
In both wars they attemted to gain control of the seas (slightly more realistically during WW1), but predictably failed.
The resources wasted on a doomed battlefleet (Plan Z) before WW2, could have gone to creating a more potent U-boat force before the start of the war (it was extremely effective in 39-40, but way too small for a complete blockade). This, combined with the stunning victory in France, would have given them a real chance of knocking the British out of the war early - without control of the seas.
Long story short? Don´t play to the enemy´s strengths.
PS: I hear S2 of Girls und Panzer is coming soon, hope to see you there ;)
hjorturerlend but, the ww2 british fleet, while big, was heavily outdated, and wasnt ready for war. the germans also developed very advanced cruisers and battleships, which could possibly have knocked out a majority of the home fleet out of the war.
finally someone mentioned about the "we will be home before christmas"!
That last French one got me giggling a bit lol
The reverse gear and rear mirror guide is actually a collaborative french and british guide of the low countries published in 1940. The Brits censored it after Market Garden , however a supplement called "Gardening in Holland" was added.
Arab amd English collab: How to defeat a spearwall: it comes in two editions, the Tours and Bonnackburn editions.
Scotland: Why arrows are overrated: Falkirk edition
The joys of doddling in a barrage, Culloden edition.
France: How not to destroy six battalions at Minden: the guide to poorly thought out cavalry charges
Fucking Brilliant Mate!
Hilarious, the Italian jabs especially. :)
You left out a great British one. How to secure multiple bridges on the same day paratrooper edition.
:D those bridges will be only defended by old men and children
From the British I love the book "Words mean more than Actions"(1935-1939 edition)
This was hilarious, can we get more of this series?
You forgot this best-selling American classic:
More Bang for Your Buck: How to Completely Eliminate Waste and Cost Overruns in Military Procurement Programs
Love it!
What about "Getting the Best out of Your High Command" by J.V. Stalin? It's one of the most instructional war-manuals in history!
:)
How to Win Wars against Small Countries, co-written by Jadid, Nasser, and Hussein I.
00:35 How to start à war and blâme someone else ... very interesting topic started with Julius Caesar légions versus Gaulois de Vercingétorix, don't You think ?
The international bestselling news bulletin: The Real Truth about This conflict.
and the Scandinavian classic: BFFs through war.
Oh hell ... i forgot another german classic:
Panzerfibel 45: How to operate tanks without having petrol
(also available as Luftwaffe edition)
My fucking sides, I got all of them.
A more recent one is - A guide to topple dictatorships leading to instability - available in Latin (20th century)and Arabic(early 21st century) as well as American English.
Hahaha, MOAR!
you forgot a few
japan: guns are overated
(very popular in china and russia as well)
germany and france: Winter coats are for suckers
france: not preparing for what happened 25 years ago
international bestsellers:
supply lines 101
walk slowly at machineguns
(1914 - 1918 edition)
How to ignore previous wars and mistakes
Chile's: Bridge burning 101
'War Winning Logistics and Medical Care'
By Gen Hideki Toyo (1941)
The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it. - George Orwell
The Commissar is getting HARD! :
A thick and throbbing guide for you & your Penal Force.
With a foreword by Richard "Big Willy" Dickinson-Hancock
India: "Independence or fighting for your controller: Can't we have both?"
In this man's army the saying was "humour is like good sex - not everyone gets it"
Very good I very much enjoyed thumbs up from me
Well you forgot the Romanians' famous "Protecting your Flanks" and "Ideologies: A complete guide on how to pick one"
there was also some other Soviet titles like "A Complete guide on Counter-sniping" and "We won't be attacked: 1941 Edition"
lastly Sweden came up with "Diplomatic 2 face: Neutrality Edition"
I hear the Iraqi Army is currently dusting off "How to Win When You Have Superior Numbers and Firepower" and "Take Off Your Uniforms and Run"
Thank you. I'd needed a good laugh.
Another one for Italy: Isonzo River Geography Guide.
There is a Spanish Edition for the "Royal Incest" book too.
you forgot one for Russia:
"Quality or quantity?
The use of morale;
Finland edition"
i can honestly imagine that the penal battalion one could be printed as hand held book for commisar
pls more !
do more countries ;)
You forgot Australia: 'How to effectively kill Emus'
hilarious!