How to be Assertive at Work [WITHOUT BEING AGGRESSIVE]
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 ก.ค. 2019
- How to be Assertive at Work [WITHOUT BEING AGGRESSIVE] / It's important for you to know how to be more assertive at work so that you can have effective communication in your organization. But if you don’t know how to be more assertive at your job, it can be hard to exercise assertiveness at workplace meetings.
That’s why today we’re talking all about assertiveness at work. I’m going to give you some assertiveness techniques to teach you how to become more assertive at work. Consider this video an assertiveness training session to teach you how to speak assertively.
If you want to hear my tips that will make you assertive at work without being rude, hit play so that I can teach you all about being more assertive at work. If you’re ready for your ideas to be communicated effectively, stick with me for a few minutes while we talk about being assertive at work so I can help you with being assertive at workplace meetings and get your thoughts heard in a clear and respectful way.
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Thanks for watching! How do you plan to use assertiveness at work? Let me know in the comments below. Cheers!
I have worked in female only organisations, sadly very toxic, and full of unhealthy hierarchy. Being assertive was so important, thanks for these good tips.
Yes
After being emotionally neglected as a child and prevented from expressing any sad or distressed emotions its taken me till 36 to hear your words helping me turn my defensive frustrated passive aggressive behaviour into something respectful and effective- a win win. Subscribed 🤩 Thank you. England UK
So very to sorry that you were emotionally neglected as a child. That certainly has a negative impact on emotions. I am overjoyed that you came across this video and that it has had such a strong impact. Healing from things like this doesn’t happen over night so be strong, love yourself and surround yourself with those that bring you up not down. Wishing you all the best as you move forward in your life, you’ve got this! Cheers!
@@AdrianaGirdler Yes hun I've haven't given up this far and I am proud of myself. Your words resound and im grateful to have your response bless you and well done on your you tube achievements xx
You should be very proud of yourself! Sending you continued strength. 😊
You’ll eventually realize everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Never neglect your weaknesses……if you can’t strengthen them, simply surround yourself with trusted allies who can benefit you with the strengths you lack. Don’t be defensive, know what you’re capable of, admit your mistakes, forgive others without condition (to a point). That’s how people without confidence build it themselves brick by brick. The rest just comes naturally. I’ve only just finally gotten to that point. It’s freeing beyond description.
1. Trust in Yourself
2. Do not point finger on other people telling what they should do. Present yourself and what you are saying positively and respectfully.
3. Think about what if u are not assertive.
4. Be Empathetic and Compassionate.
5. Refer Adriana's Mindfulness and diplomacy guide.
Thank you for commenting and watching, cheers!
I need to be more assertive with my clients when it comes to pricing.
Glad you can apply the tips given in this video on how to be assertive to your own business. I wish you all the best as you implement these tips to be more assertive at work! Cheers.
This is a very good video! I must point out however, that this is much more difficult for women than for men. The double standard is as pervasive as it was many years ago even though people are much more careful about what they actually say for fear of retribution.
If a man is assertive, then he is a leader, a visionary, and strong. If a woman is assertive, even without being aggressive, many people would consider her to be a b****.
This is completely wrong. In the military and civilian life, I’ve had some (not all) EPIC female superiors and punk male superiors. I just hope that when people implement your valuable content, especially women, that they will get the respect they deserve.
Hey Faith 2 Achieve, thanks for sharing your experience with this and shining a light on some difficulties that can be had when it comes to assertiveness. You bring up a great point, there often can still be this double standard that can make the experience more challenging for women. It's so great to hear that you've had awesome and assertive female superiors who have succeeded at their roles in leadership. This is where confidence and respectfulness is especially important and comes into play with assertiveness. Great insight, thanks so much for sharing! Cheers!
@@AdrianaGirdler Thank you!!
I’m currently experiencing this at work. A male coworker gets away for doing the bare minimum/not supporting the team. When I go above and beyond I feel my manager being condescending towards me like nothing is ever good enough that I do. Always ask me what I’m doing (when it’s obvious) but never questions my male coworker when he is on his phone doing nothing. When I try to address my concerns I feel stupid. Any advice on how to properly address it
@@dianasepulveda1194 Know your worth and be assertive, show that you know your worth. Knowing your worth comes in various forms and once you know your worth you'll know what to do. You can only take responsibility for your actions. Look at it this way: your colleague is acting dumb, but you are utilising your time there for experience. You never know where life is taking you so keep going
@@dianasepulveda1194 I totally understand you. The same happens to me but in my situation I dont speak up about his lack of support because I feel sorry for him and dont want him to lose his job. I feel that my boss should also be the one to notice these things instead of me feeling like a snitch. *frustrating*
Great tips on how to be assertive at work. It's true that there is a fine line between being assertive and being aggressive. Being mindful will definitely keep you on the assertive rather than aggressive side and let you put your ideas forward in a respectful and positive way.
Yes! Positivity and respectfulness are key when it comes to how to be assertive at work. Thanks for watching. Cheers!
I’ve been watching many of your videos and other People’s channels on how to be assertive for the past month. I felt like I have been getting walked all over at my workplace because I avoid confrontation and kind of just go with the flow and now I’m realizing how weak my coworkers think I am because of that. I finally spoke up about something that I realized my coworkers were making me do that I wasn’t suppose to be doing. I basically asked them if our manager knows about the way things are being done around here lol they were so scared. I guess they didn’t think I was able to question anything. I’m usually aware of everything that’s going on and when people are trying to fool me but it’s hard for me to speak up or It won’t click to me right away and when it finally hits me I convince myself it’s too late to say something. Your videos have helped me soo much I’m so glad I’m finally feel somewhat comfortable to express my emotions without feeling like I’m going to die if I do lol
Hi Urji. I am so happy to hear that my videos and those from others have helped you become more assertive at work. Keep it up! Wishing you all the best and thanks for watching, cheers!
I've definitely struggled with this in the past! I think my positive/optimistic personality sometimes get in the way. Thanks so much Adriana for sharing.
Hey, Adriene - having a positive personality is great! I can see how it would be challenging to be assertive because of this. Simply learning to bring your positive attitude into being assertive will make for killer communication skills from you! It's just a matter of mastering how to be assertive at work. Cheers!
I love that you are excavating this. There is a difference between aggression and assertion and I think the tips you offered here are so helpful! It's so important to always share from a place of empathy and compassion. I refer to this as flexing your "empathy muscle!"
So glad you liked this video, Heather! Yes, there is a difference between being aggressive and assertive that's important to understand. Flexing your "empathy muscle" - I LOVE that! Thanks for sharing your insight on how to be assertive at work, cheers!
I found this helpful because I don't like confrontation and I usually avoid it. I am naturally shy and sensitive to people's emotions. Well, I know that it is not the best idea because it comes across that I am easy person to walk all over. I will do some of these techniques to apply at my workplace.🙌
I feel the majority of us try to avoid confrontation. Being sensitive to people’s emotions is a wonderful quality to have, it’s shows you are a caring individual. Thank you for watching and I do hope some of these tips help you moving forward. Cheers!
@@AdrianaGirdler Thankyou very much.🤗💞
The advice to think what would happen if you weren’t assertive is priceless. This helps me understand that what I need is non-negociable because the long term effects of not having those needs fulfilled now are not desirable either for me personally or for the workplace I am in.
I think this idea is invaluable because shy and sensitive and empathetic people tend not to fight for themselves and then end up being doormats and bitter, miserable people (which is bound to happen when one is not heard and seen).
I have a situation where I need to be assertive today. I really hope to turn my aggressiveness into assertiveness.
Hi Simona, I hope this video will help you today as you face your situation. Thank you for watching and sharing. Wishing you a wonderful day and hope it unfolds in the most positive way for you. cheers!
Great points. It's important to be assertive in a manner that sends the point across without being disrespectful. Thank you for sharing
Absolutely. Have you ever struggled to be assertive at work? I would love to hear from you. Cheers!
I am so refreshed by the advice you gave and the fact that you did not focus it on remaining “feminine”. So many other videos I watched focused on that and I wasn’t learning much. Thank you for keeping the focus on improving our skills and not peoples perspective of people as feminine or masculine
Thank you so much, Debbie. At the end of the day its all about your skills and not that of being feminine or masculine. Thanks for taking the time to comment, I am so happy that this video was refreshing and that you were able to take away some positive tips. Cheers!
Excellent Adriana, I really think you touched on some great points here. I think empathy for others can be key
For sure - especially if the aim is assertiveness. You don't want to be rude or inconsiderate when it comes to being assertive at work. Thanks for watching. Cheers!
Yes acknowledging the emotion and showing empathy is a big deal! Looking from a bird eye view for a win-win solution too maybe~. Great video Adriana. Love this channel~
Win-win solutions are the best whenever possible! Thanks for watching, so glad you liked this video on how to be assertive at work. Cheers!
Believe in what you bring to the table...I love that advice! It's so empowering for women to believe in themselves, but we so often forget! Great video!
Yes, believing in yourself is key! Knowing how to be assertive starts with the ability to be confident and believe in yourself. Cheers!
I've always wondered how to do this. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for watching! Which tip are you going to implement to be more assertive at work?
Assertiveness is critical if one wants to grow! love this
Thank you, and thanks for watching, cheers!
Loved the video and the practical examples in a short 5 mins video.. thank you for this video
Thank you so much, Asma. I am happy this video was helpful! Cheers!
Super cool! Loving your channel. Subscribed!
Hey, Logan! So glad you're loving my channel. I hope you stick around and stay in touch. Cheers!
Thanks, these are great tips. It's hard to not cross the line to aggressive. Good clarity here!
Yes, there is a fine and blurred line but it is truly possible to be assertive while remaining calm and respectful. Thanks for watching, cheers!
I love this content !!! I like your exception what if you're not assertive =). Powerful message
Thank you, Mike! Do you ever have to be assertive in the work you do? Cheers!
I love the idea of bringing mindfulness into how to be assertive at work. It's important to be aware of others' feelings and perspectives and be assertive without being aggressive. I'm always afraid of seeming aggressive so I need to work on being more assertive at work in a confident way.
Thanks for watching my video on how to be assertive at work! So glad you were able to learn something from this video on how to be assertive without being aggressive. Cheers!
I watch this at least 2x a week on my lunch break! Thanks Adriana
You're so welcome! Thanks for watching, cheers!
Empathy and compassion + respect, will allow for better communication and better productivity. Very informative video!
Thanks for watching Tiffany! Yes, compassion and respect go a long way. Cheers!
I was like nr. 1000 ! 😁 Thank you so much for this !
You’re very welcome. Thanks for watching, cheers!
Awesome video, these tips are very practical.
Thanks, Jennifer! Have you ever struggled to be assertive at work?
Thank you very much indeed.
You are so very welcome! Thanks for watching, cheers!
Another great video Adriana!
Thank you! Do you struggle to be assertive at work?
Very helpful, thank you!
You are so welcome. Thank you for watching, cheers!
It is tricky, as most of the times the is a really fine line between the two! Great tips!
Agreed! It can be tricky but it is important to learn how to be assertive at work so you can communicate efficiently and effectively. Cheers!
Your video give me a way to be assertive and keep being calm. Really nice video
So happy to hear. Thanks for watching, cheers!
Interesting! Thanks for sharing.
Thanks! Which tip was your favourite on how to be assertive at work?
Well done for this video, this is really helpful for us to reflect on the way we interact with others and keep us motivated to keep move on
Absolutely! Thanks for watching, cheers!
Awesome content! Thanks for sharing
Thanks for watching, Sarah! Which tip was your favourite to be assertive at work? Cheers!
Yes!! Such a great topic. Super important to be able to be assertive (without being a b*%#!) Totally agree with being positive!
Yes! Positivity all the way, even and especially with assertiveness at work! Thanks for watching and commenting. Cheers!
I’ve become a union chairman for my company and I keep hearing that I’m being too soft. I think I’m assertive, but not assertive enough to maintain the trust of my membership.
Thank you for the advice Adriana.
You're most welcome. Thanks for watching and wishing you all the best. Cheers!
Congrats on your channel! BIG LIKE from me! Blessings to you! :)
Thanks, so glad you like it! I hope you'll come back and stay in touch. Cheers!
Thank you, Adriana! I learned so much from your video. And I’m curious about how to apply this in a hierarchical or political situation. For example, I’m afraid of confronting my lazy colleague because she was referred into the company by my manager. I also want to discuss my opinions with executives who don’t like it when we correct them.
Couldnt have come at a better time! I was just talking to my fiance about how I am scared to "sass" my boss and he was like dude.. she may be your boss but your both adults.. I was like I am? hahaha
Haha I'm so glad this video came at a good time, then! It's true, if you handle it in a professional way while being confident and assertive, I'm sure it will be well-received by your boss. Let me know if you implement these tips to be assertive. Cheers!
I totally need to learn how to be assertive -believe ! What if I don't speak up is a truism !
Thanks for watching, Eli! So glad you were able to learn something from this video about how to be assertive at work. Cheers!
Thank you!!
You're welcome! Thanks for watching, cheers!
Very helpful
Pleased to hear this video was helpful! Thanks for watching, cheers!
I have a coworker that is overwhelmed with her work. My manager asked if I'd be willing to take on some of her work until she's caught up. Fast forward TWO YEARS and I'm STILL doing it with no end in sight. Not to mention, NO PAY RAISE for the increased responsibilities. Now that coworker who was once grateful, is emailing me asking me to do more. She says it politely but when I refuse, she starts in on character attacks, accusing me of "wanting to do the bare minimum." If I truely wanted that, I would not take have agreed to take on some of HER work on top of my own responsibilities. It makes me feel bitter about helping her and management keeps talking to her about the way she speaks to me but she's only professional for a few days and goes right back to the attacks. I've been assertive with her but it doesn't work. I've ignored her emails that are riddled with insults and simply forwarded them to the manager and asked that she address the behavior. No change. The manager says she agrees with me, but has yet to give his coworker a WRITTEN warning. At what point do you go to HR? I don't want to create a worse relationship with this coworker (I need her expertise sometimes) or create tention with my manager.
There is a lot to unpack here and I can’t answer it all. A lot of time has passed without course correction which will bring about some additional challenges. The only way to fix this now is to get clear on your roles and responsibilities and share this with your manager. Highlight the extra additional tasks you are doing outside of this. Once you have clarity ask your manager to reinforce it. If this does not work then you have some serious decisions to make. Is this the right organization for you to work in. Respect and guidance are a must in all work settings and should be expected. Good luck.
PS….you may want to consider speaking to a business coach and give them the full picture so you can get the right advice to make your decision.
great vid!
Thank you Jurben, appreciate you tuning in to my channel, Cheers!
Oh Lord bless me being a master communicator🙏🙏🙏🤝💪💪💪
I do really appreciate your video.🙏🙏🙏could you bring up some examples or some assertive phrases for the work place? Because most assertiveness videos stand mostly in family or everyday life. And how do we remain assertive while someone starts to be agressive while we were assertive in the first place? 🤔🤔🤔Thank you in advance.
Great question. This would actually be a great topic for a TH-cam video. Stay tuned and thanks for watching, cheers!
Yes, I have ALWAYS wanted to learn this skill!!! Good point that it is your duty and that it can be done with compassion. Thank you!
It truly can! Which of these tips are you going to implement to start learning how to be assertive at work? Cheers!
completed 10/8/21. Good Morning Mi Maestra :)
Good morning, Nitin. Have a fabulous day and weekend. Cheers!
Great video Adriana. Very helpful tips as always. Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for watching, Dal! Have you ever felt you needed to learn how to be assertive at work? Cheers!
I trust in myself
So wonderful! Thanks for watching, cheers!
thanks 4u watching
Cheers!
Apparently my skin makes me aggressive. Not only am I soft spoken person, I smile when I speak, and I don’t use attack words. Yet, I get read as aggressive. Do you have tips for black people, black women in particular?
Thanks for watching my video and for your question. Without witnessing one of your interactions it is difficult to comment on your specific situation. What I can say is if you are doing everything in your power to be professional and respectful then it’s not about you...it’s about them. We can’t control other people’s behaviour, only our own. With that in mind here are my general suggestions:
1-Ensure you are professional and respectful in your interactions
2- Start to document your interactions so you have a paper trail of your interactions/ experiences
3- if you see a pattern with a particular person you may want to reach out to HR with your documentation
4- if it is a culture issue in the organization you may want to start looking for another job. Disrespectful workplaces are not acceptable and there are great organization out there, you just need to actively look.
I wish you all the best in your journey. May everything unfold perfectly for you.
Believe in me !
Thanks for watching, cheers!
This content is striking. I read a similar book that altered my entire outlook. "The Art of Saying No: Mastering Boundaries for a Fulfilling Life" by Samuel Dawn
Thank you and thanks for watching, cheers!
Believe in me❤
I BELIEVE IN ME
Believing in yourself is one of the keys to not only being happy but successful!! Thanks for watching and keep believing in you! Cheers!
BELIEVE IN ME ♥
Thanks for watching, cheers!
"Believe in me".
*has roach killer on my desk*
Smartass coworker: Woah, do we have a roach problem?
Me: Yeah, and I'm looking at the biggest one I have ever seen.
Smartass coworker: ...
believe in me
Thanks for watching! Cheers!
video importee dans ma tete trilingue.
To be completely honest, assertiveness never worked for me. It was only after I stopped caring because I knew I was worth far more than I was paid….and that confidence crept in. It has to be both. I’m not joking, I went up the management chain to the VP in 30 minutes and asked for a 30% raise. He laughed, so I threw an open offer I’ve been saving back in his face. That…..was a glorious day in my life.
I am happy to hear you found the confidence you were looking for. Everyone is different and glad you found what worked for you. Thanks for watching and wishing you all the best and great success! Cheers!
@@AdrianaGirdler why does it work that way? It’s like you have to project an aura not to be messed with. I don’t like it. I just want respect and recognition. I shouldn’t have to stomp on someone to get respect. But I will if I have to.
@@I_SuperHiro_I because being assertive is a lie. At least it doesn't work when it's clear the other person already doesn't respect you. It's aggression and win or aggression and leave.
Using assertive to demand for my leave holidays and not working late unnecessarily
Great ways to be assertive at work. Thank you for sharing what you do to stay assertive with out being aggressive. Cheers!
Whew because I want to go from 0 to 100 with the idiots at my job
Believe in me
Believe in ME
Believe in me.
Thank you for watching, cheers!
This is such a great topic, I would love to support your channel hope you support back I would appreciate it. Thank you and keep in touch 😘 Have a great day.
Thanks for watching my video on how to be assertive at work! So glad you like the channel. I'll give yours a watch now. Cheers!
Yeah no it took too long to get to the advice section, there is only one bit of advice and it is to speak condescendingly to other people lol. " i see you're compassionate about this but let's talk later" I doubt a single person has EVER liked being talked to that way. Jfc
Thanks for your feedback and for watching.
Fluff
Believe in me!
Thanks for watching!! Cheers!
Believe in me
Believe in me.
Thanks for watching, cheers!
Believe in me
Believe in me
Thank you for watching, cheers!
Believe in me
Thank you for watching, cheers!
Believe in me.
Thanks for watching! Cheers!