It’s a whole different game when they think the baby may have ingested meconium aspiration!! Medical staff must do what’s best for your child regardless of what your expectations were…
Yes true! Because even with fentanyl and then epidural, I still couldn’t sleep because I was so excited to meet my baby 😂. All it does is take away the pain. Giving birth to my daughter was the most peaceful, enjoyable experience ❤
I’m an ultrasound tech…on that page where it said gender it meant your gender bc you are the patient, not the babies gender. She didn’t want you to look not because it had babies gender but because she probably didn’t want you to see that and get confused
Hey there! German midwife here and your video just popped up on my fyp. Thank you for telling your story ❤ I really am sorry your experience was not how you have wanted it to be. I understand and am sorry. Also I think some comments here are rather rude and not sensitive. This is a momma that wished her experience to be different and that is absolutely understandable. If I am allowed to give you or any reader a little advise or suggestion as a midwife AND a mother: I was going for the most natural experience for my births as well and I know all the things that can happen in a delivery ward and the medical interventions happening or the things the hospital staff sometimes does not do to encourage a natural birth. So for me a hospital birth was not an option. I gave birth in a BIRTH CENTRE and my second was born AT HOME and it was THE BEST DECISION for me! So natural; I was self-determined, gave birth in upright positions, not forced to do anything I did not want to, was able to eat and drink and give birth in the water, no pushing on the belly or intense pushing the baby out, everybody respected all my decision like for example clamping the cord when the placenta is birthed etc. ☺ I can really really HIGHLY RECOMMEND a birth outside of the hospital to any healthy mother with a healthy pregnancy. There are so incredibly many advantages compared to a birth in the hospital, most certainly way less interventions and therefore no intervention cascade leading to more interventions leading to more complications and risks. Also outside-the-hospital births are not less safe! At least here in Germany a home birth is the safest way to give birth for several reasons (if the mother is healthy) ☺ If you or any other mom has got any questions please ask me! I am happy to help. 🧡 There are also so many beautiful home birth vlogs here on TH-cam, that can help you see the Beauty of home birth ☺
I’m a midwife, too, and as soon as I saw the hospital in the title and heard she wanted to do things natural, I thought “unfortunately, the hospital is not the best place for that.” I feel that just stepping into a hospital can change the whole experience for the woman.
Thank you so much for writing all of this! I really appreciate it ❤️ I’m currently pregnant with my second and planning a home birth! I think things will be much different this time around!
Unfortunately where I live home births are not a thing. I'm pregnant with my second and all I wanted was to stay at home as long as possible, but this time I have diabetes so I have to get an induction this week and I'm terrified I already feel like I'm not going to be in control of anything.
Just to be clear, so that other first timers don't get the wrong idea ... no one has an 80+ hour labour. Labour doesn't start until you're 4cm dilated. It's SO important to stress that, so energy isn't wasted freaking out about those early and relatively mild contractions.
Oh man yeah this is not meant to freak out any first time mamas! I think there are so many lessons to learn from my experience. I do disagree on the dilation though. From my research, dilation really doesn’t tell you much unfortunately.
It's true that no one is in active labor for 80+ hours, but that does not mean that the hours/days of contractions before that are "mild." I had contractions less than 10 minutes apart for 84 hours - it was early labor until the last 8-10, but strong and frequent enough contractions that I could not sleep through them and had to vocalize. Of course I also don't say this to scare anyone, I ended up having an unmedicated birth on the toilet with no tearing and an easy recovery. But I was so, so tired! I'm glad I knew enough not to panic about the length of it so I didn't end up with unnecessary interventions.
@@CrunchyMomClub That's fine. I'm in obstetrics so I'm just telling what the professional position is. Around the world, labour isn't considered active (ie actual labour) until at least 4cm. Prior to that is 'pre-labour'. Basically just ripening the cervix. I agree that dilation doesn't tell you much about how you're progressing, unless you check several times, over a period of time. A single read can only tell you whether you're in active labour or not. As for how we individually respond to pre-labour, that's mind stuff. Some first timers ignore it completely, carry on with their day, and arrive at hospital at 9cm dilated and feeling pushy. Because our response differs according to our personality and attitude, our presentations are all different. Unfortunately many first timers do 'fight' the pain, which makes it considerably worse, AND slows progress.
She was very clear about HER experience and it sounds like it was indeed a long 86 hour labor. Meconium is also frequent. It is absolutely FALSE that labour doesn't "begin" until your 4cm dilated. Every woman every prengnacy is unique. I've given birth eight times. The hardest part of my labour for me personally is reaching 4cm I typically spend 90 of my total laboring time getting to 4cm once I hit 4 I tend to hit 10cm deliver within 30 mins (with or without epidural) labour isn't a cookie cutter one size fits all.
@@leannd9072 Sure, and HER experience was HERS. Like I said, it's quite subjective. But in the business we DO have firm criteria, whether you like it or not. And no matter what you prefer to believe, we only consider it active labour from 4cm. Whatever happens before that, is just preparation for that labour. In your case (and in my own, with my own three births), there is a day or so of pre-labour, and very quick active labour. For other women it might be just a few hours of pre-labour, then many hours of active labour. None of which changes the 4cm thing. As you yourself said, it's different for every woman ... but every woman is still regarded as not in labour until 4cm.
I can sense the disappointment of things not going the way you'd hope in the end but you should be so so proud of yourself for this birth!! There were many times when you couldve given up (and many women do) much earlier in your labor and you didn't. It was smart to stay home as long as you could and I loved how you continued to advocate for yourself and your baby (turning down medications/interventions) whenever you could. You were a very informed first time mom and it shows! I had a shorter labor but a very similar first time birth so I can relate to the feelings of disappointment and frustration. You learn as much as you can going into it but there's nothing that can really prepare you mentally and spiritually for birth until you go through it! I just wanted to offer some encouragement and words of wisdom (that you don't have to listen to because I'm a stranger on the internet lol) BUT birth is more spiritual than anything else. A lot of what makes a "successful" unmedicated/"natural" birth experience is the understanding that you must surrender to it fully. And hold space for the instinctual mother to come out and do the work. Remaining in a dark, quiet space. Keeping the labor private (not telling a bunch of people or inviting a bunch of energies into your home). Not "thinking" so much about what you should be doing or the timing or really anything that requires actual thought at all. The more your conscious brain does, the less space there is for your subconscious, instinctual brain to continue pumping the right hormones and leading your body to move your baby out. All the vaginal checks often do nothing but disappoint. And honestly, they are accurate or reliable as the cervix is a sphincter, it can open and close... alot of people don't know that. Anywho, I hope that one day you feel comfortable enough to try again! Birth can still be magical and beautiful! Good luck to you!
I’m so sorry your experience was so much different than you desired for your birth but way to go for allowing it to move you forward rather than making you fearful for the future. My third birth was incredibly redeeming and I hope you will be able to have the same experience with your next baby!
Back labor is extremely painful. I had back labor for my first and I went through early labor for weeks. I remember I went into the hospital and they told me I was 4 cm but not contracting regularly enough I could stay at hospital or I could go home so I went home and I literally stayed pregnant and miserable for the next 10 days with back labor and contractions the whole way! Very frustrating and painful. Finally had her in a very fast natural birth 10 days after. That was 25 years ago when they didn't interfere with labor as much. Back labor is agonizing and confusing for the first pregnancy. I literally just felt like my back was breaking and I constantly had pressure like I had to go poop 😅 I spent a lot of time in the tub and in the shower trying to relieve the pain. Glad that you still kind of had a surprise with the gender and that he was healthy ❤️
Labor starts when you are in active labor, not from your first contraction. From 4-5 cm on. You did so well but I’m sorry about the gender thing, but healthy baby and healthy mom is most important.
@@CrunchyMomClubYes, that is correct. Congratulations on your baby boy! I can remember my grandmother telling me that she had contractions like you did for a solid seven days. I had a baby that had meconium when my water broke. Like you he was whisked away for them to suction him to make sure he didn’t aspirate any. Unfortunately he did and ended up in the NICU due to a bacterial infection in his lungs from it. He had to stay for two weeks and it was so hard leaving him there. I was able to take my breast milk and they bottle fed it to him but because I wasn’t able to be there every 3 hours for two weeks to feed him because I had a terrible tear that required them to stitch two layers and I had so many stitches it was almost impossible for me to sit that by the time he came home he would not breast feed. We tried everything. I was heartbroken. Between that and my extensive wound care that I was having to go through to heal it sent me into PPD. It was the most difficult recovery. I tell everyone that it was worse than my C-section. It’s a whole different hurt from having an incision on your stomach to having a cut down there that goes from one hole to the next and they still had to use forceps to get this little 4 lbs 12 oz baby out of you. Those little boys can give us a difficult long labor. Both of my boys did. One emergency C-section and one 36 hour labor. My 3 girls labors were beautiful and easy. I pray your next labor is speedy and smooth. ❤❤❤
@@xl0vex97x don’t believe everything that you read on google, labor is defined as uterine contractions that are long enough and strong enough to make cervical change, usually diagnosed by cervical exams.
Thank you for sharing your story!!! And congratulations on your sweet baby. As a doula I'm sorry that some of your wishes weren't heard or respected (them changing the Pitocin without your consent, not delaying cord clamping longer, etc) but I pray that your next birth experience can be more positive in your eyes. Everyone's labor is so unique and there is so much to learn from the stories. Thank you for being brave and vulnerable enough to share yours :)
You are so sweet! Thank you for such kind words. I definitely should have hired a doula for my birth and I recommend one for anyone trying to have a natural birth. I’m thankful for what you do🤍
I can’t understand this animus you have toward the medical profession. You look at them as your enemy. It seems also that you wanted to control every aspect of the birth. Your body will do what it needs to do and you certainly cannot hurry it along. Worrying about your labor bc you weren’t making progress probably turned into anxiety which is difficult to control. I hope for your next birth you try to relax and listen to your body. It’s okay if you have a long delivery. And please think of the baby before refusing pitocin which would have made all the difference. It’s okay to have medical intervention bc your body needed it. From a mother of three, remember “it is what it is” so just go along with any changes and trust the medical profession. They really have your best interest at heart. ❤️
Thank you for watching and commenting. I do have a bit of animosity towards birth healthcare professionals. I’ve done a lot of research and in my opinion birth workers do more harm than good in many cases🥴. I don’t think it’s done maliciously and I also know most won’t agree with that statement. You’re right about not needing to worry or hurry things! I do need to relax and listen to my body next time!
my daughter is 38 wks along....she has a birth plan very much like yours. She is adamant that everything must go according to her plan. Natural, no drugs...She has hired a birth doula to be sure her wishes are respected. I'm so glad to have seen your video. and feel very much less stressed about what to possibly expect. I personally had three babies, all with epidural...and have a hard time thinking I will be seeing my daughter in such pain. Thanks for sharing your birth experience.
Oh how exciting for your daughter! I definitely think having a doula would have helps tremendously so I’m happy she is doing that! Good luck to her and you❤️
I get wanting a natural birth and all, but please Mother's you need to think of the baby and thier health. Your only want is to get the baby out asap, especially after the water has been broken.
I totally agree the babies health is most important, but your water can be broken without complications! I’ve actually heard stories of women’s water being open for a week and the baby was fine🤯🤯 it’s all about the mom and babies exact circumstances and what decisions she wants to make!
You can still have a natural birth after your waters break. Having a preference doesn't negate from your 1st priority being healthy baby and mom. Please don't try insinuate this lady or any other lady wanting as natural a birth as possible is risking either theirs or their baby's health by having a preference. Just because a natural birth isn't as strong of a preference for you doesn't mean it isn't for another or that either of you are wtong
It's so great of you to share this story. You're a brave woman. It sucks that so many people didn't respect your wishes and you felt so much pressure to do things you didn't want. That midwife was not great, sorry to say. Your instincts were great and you should be proud you warriored through. A peaceful and loving, joyful atmosphere brings your oxytocin which increases labor, and no one helped that happen. You were treated so badly. I'm so sorry it wasn't your ideal birth. I'd really suggest getting a duola next time. A duola is your protective bubble to make sure you have the experience you wanted. You'll tell her everything you envision ahead of time so you don't have to think and make the decisions in labor. She can also be your coach and support your husband. I'm so glad to hear your positive outlook and wish the best for you.
Thanks for listening to my story! You’re so right about the doula. I definitely should have had one and definitely looking into one next time around ❤️
Also, the reason you progressed so fast once you had the epidural, is because you were no longer over reacting to the discomfort of early labour. Your stress levels were so high that adrenaline blocked the prostaglandins necessary for progress. This happens when we have an extreme response to pain. Early labour is uncomfortable for everyone. It's not painful in the way labour is, but it's not painless either. It's our response which matters. The pain is basically the same for everyone, but we all respond to it differently.
You know it’s crazy how different people can feel during labor. It really depends on a lot of thinks like if you have back labor or not, where your baby is positioned, and even the alignment of your own body. Early labor is intense for some and for others they have no idea isn’t even happening! Another thing to think about is how Pitocin plays a role in speeding up labor. Typically, from my research, epidurals can make labor slow down. I also said many time the back labor was the only real “pain” I was feeling. Although my labor was long, I was extremely calm, quiet, and relaxed through contractions. I hope that’s comforting for moms!
Why are you so rude to this lady? Your comments sound like your projecting some sort of anger towards her. She didn't over react to the pain whatsoever. That's really unkind to phrase it like that. How dare you say she over reacted based on a pain that you are not in her body feeling. That's incorrect the pain isn't the same for everyone or every labour. I would know this because I've given birth 7times and each early labour was very different in terms of pain. I have given birth in my 20s, 30s and my last at almost 40 all vastly different. I'm also a registered Irish midwife currently on extended maternity leave
@@wednesday9623 Because first timers need as much information as possible. They need to know that it's not productive to stress too much during early labour.
@pm2886 Your comment is giving first timers false information saying the pain is the same for everyone just how we react to it. That is not true. Every birth is different. Your attitude and the way you speak down to people and their birth choices is what's not productive
@@wednesday9623 Yes, exactly. Every birth is different, because every woman is different - and different at different times in her life. The birth process (barring complications) however, is pretty much always the same. How we PERCEIVE the process is unique to us, and to the time in our life. That's the reality, and that's what women need to know. They don't need to know that the birth process differs wildly from woman to woman, and birth to birth. Imagine how terrifying that is to a first timer ... to hear that she could be unlucky enough to have an excrutiatingly painful 80 hour labour - one more painful than anyone else's? That's a very inconsiderate falsehood to impose on young women. They need to know that's not reality.
There was so much you could have done to move things alone faster. And you should have considered starting the pitocin sooner if your baby had had their first poop. Also an epidural works a whole lot better than flash cards!!
Oh man I agree. I think staying home longer would have made my labor shorter, but you live and learn. Pitocin just wasn’t my number one choice due to all the known risks. Also interesting fact that most people don’t know is that meconium is not actually poop. Anyways sorry for your experience. Praying you have a different outcome if you give birth again! 🤍
What?? No. You do realise that forcing your body to contract when it doesn't naturally want to is the fastest way to distress a baby? It's a synthetic hormone, that would only speed up her chance of an emergency c-section anyone thats had a birth without pitocin to conpare will tell you its horrificly more painful. Also not everyone wants an epidural neither does it work for everyone. Have you actually tried flash cards? You are so rude just because her birth preferences don't align with yours.
My first birth was very similar! 4 days (or nights I should say) of prodromal labor. I was SO EXHAUSTED. I didn’t get pitocin to induce but we did do the midwives brew of castor oil. Which messed with my baby’s heart rate. I still did have a natural birth like I wanted but I did end up in the hospital and was traumatized by the nurses there bullying us. I am now expecting my 4th baby. It gets easier(as in shorter). Every birth is different!
It is so common to hear about nurses bullying. My daughter just had a baby but she went to a birth clinic but her best friend went to a hospital and totally had a horrible time dealing with very mean nurses that would not honor her plan. So frustrating. I really hope that the birthing industry gets a big shake-up. It needs it. It's so different from when I was having my kids 20 + years ago
I am surprised with your attitude towards this. Seems like you tortured yourself for 80 hours "birthing the RIGHT way", then you finally listened to those terrible doctors and you had the rest of the birth fast and easy. Don't you think that if you went with pytosin and epidural you would have a very different positive experience and by day 5 be already home with your baby boy?
I don’t think there is any “right” way to birth. I also don’t think the doctors are dumb, I think they are doing exactly what they are trained to do. I totally see how it seemed like I tortured myself and I think I even mentioned that! There were a ton of positives and things I learned through the birth I had. Pitocin and an epidural are just not what I personally think are best for mama and baby! (Depending on the circumstances of course😊)
@@CrunchyMomClub this is what I don't get. After everything YOU have been through why do YOU (not what some random doula on the internet) think epidurals and pitocin are not a good idea?
@@piaaapsiiiyou've answered your own question because of HER experience. Now answer me this, why are you so nasty to try and belittle a woman on the internet for her birth preferences? Have you birthed a baby without pitocin or a epidural? I have had both and I would go through birth another 7 times without either because for ME it's my preference. There are risks associated with pitocin and guess what? I'm a registered hospital midwife. There is no right way to birth, I pray you find healing before life humbles you
@@wednesday9623 you know what you're right. My choice of words was not the kindest indeed. I do apologize! My goal was to understand better what she drew her conclusions on. She is highly oposed to pytosin and epidurals, which in her case seemed to help (from her own story). I kept hearing messages that are highly popular around social media. We all do reasearch, not all of us have practical personal experience and I believe the goal of this video is to share the latter. Yet, this is what is missing for me here - the connection between what was previously researched, which built her expectations for birth and how these expectations are not changed from this very different experience she eventually had.
@piaaapsiii Pitocin forces the body to contract unnaturally, so the experience is alot more painful and there are many side effects. Epidural also comes with a lot of side effects which is why alot of women especially in other country's try not to use them. The point also was the pitocin drip was turned up without her consent. She feels like now reflecting she didn't need either but they were pushed apon her. I am on the side of youtube as I'm a midwife in Ireland and a mother of 7 and I'm always curious to hear of people's birth experiences especially in a different country. When I read the comments there was so many negative ones against her birth preferences, I suspect because of the word crunchy in her username which is ridiculous. I felt compelled to come to the comments and defend this lovely woman, as there is no correct way to birth and everyone's experience is valid. Your apology of your choice of words is very refreshing alot of people instead of taking accountability go on the defence. So it's nice to have a discussion with another woman who i can tell has empathy. Are you considering birthing with/without pitocin? I have birthed with & without if you have any questions I would love to answer them for you❤️
Ive had six babies. The last one kinda went like this. I do want to tell anyone thats reading these comments that my painfull back labor and long labor ended up being because baby was posterior. awful back labor. I wasnt actually even dilating. only 1 cm when getting to the hospital (all of my other babies I was dilated to at least a 7 when i got in to the hospital). What I learned is how important it is to get baby into the optimal position way in advance! The contractions are happening because your body is trying to move the baby into the right position. Its so painful because baby is pushing on your back and thats also why theres no dilation. It sounds like this baby was a big boy so he couldnt make the turn which is why its so important to start getting the baby in the correct position earlier. So, in third trimester (or sooner) no reclining, Do hands and knees 15 min a day (it gets baby out of posterior position and teaches them how to enter the birth canal) I can actually feel baby moving down after ten min of hands and knees. If baby still isnt getting out of posterior position or any of the other weird positions that babies get into then spinning babies really helps tell you which exercises to do and in what order (order is very important!!). I think the reason babies get in these positions so frequently now is because we live such sedentary lives. Women used to do a lot more laborious tasks throughout the day. Anyway, exercise is SO good for positioning during pregnancy. Sitting a lot is bad. If you do sit, sit with your knees lower than your hips/pelvis. Hope this helps someone! Im pregnant with baby number seven and I pray this one goes smoothly!!
My suggestion to you would be go to midwife next time and take all the classes they offer you and don't read stuff online about "what you should" expect. Every baby and every labor is different.
I think you did amazing! Considering how long the labor was, you should be really proud of yourself. Thank you for sharing your story and remaining positive. I was able to have unmedicated birth first time around but now with baby #2 learning more about different experiences that other women have and it is good to be prepared for something unplanned. Your birth story also reminded me how important it is to rest and sleep while you still can do this. ❤
You're a patient woman. My husband would not be getting sleep like that! They may not carry the baby...but they helped make them. I'm sorry but I'd have to say get your ass up 😂 you must have said 5 times this man was sleeping...like sleep away the hard part...until it's time for the baby....what?? With that said. I'm sorry you went through such a traumatic birth. Us women are superheroes for sure!!
Congratulations on your new little miracle. Labor is not for the weak for sure....I had a daughter,56 hrs of HARD labor-contractions were 2 minutes apart for most of that time and a son,69 hrs with 1 1/2 minutes between contractions for 40 of those hours. There was no medication at all for either bc I was just terrified of the drugs hurting my baby. Our daughter was 8'5oz and our son was 9'5oz. I hope your next labor goes faster for you, but at least now you know-IT IS WORTH IT ALL!!!! 🥰
Sorry....but if you're having contractions every minute why are they starting to give you pitocin? That makes no sense to me 😮😮😮 Congratulations 🎊 👏 💐 🥳
This was certainly a long and annoying labor… but I’m sorry but this video didn’t need to be prefaced with a look away warning. Your birth sounded wonderful. Congratulations I had 5 minutes to come to terms with having to have a c-section and then my baby was taken from my belly. Which was traumatic and I still cry about it.
Oh man I’m so sorry that happened to you! I hope if you have more babies things will be different. I totally get how your birth seemed way more traumatic than mine, but that doesn’t take away from how my birth felt for me. I prefaced the video for any new mamas looking for positive, unmedicated birth. Again I’m so sorry for what happened to you. I truly wouldn’t wish that for any mom!❤️
Myself and my partner had planned to do a gender reveal with family and had asked the hospital not to give us the gender but it did say 'Female' on one of the forms and it did turn out to be relating to MY gender so probably was refering to yours too 😂
@@CrunchyMomClub it’s the way the machine is set up with patient info, it has your name, gender, date of birth, etc. I’m an ultrasound tech. Where it said female was your gender, not the babies. Ultrasound machines are also used to do exams on males so all machines have a line that identifies patient gender.
Active labor when contractions consistently last at least 45 seconds 3 mins apart. You may not be dilated enough so there are interventions they need to do or emergency c sections, but you’re not having active labor if you’re able to walk it off and do things to make your contraction better. Usually when you’re close to having labor, you’ll feel contractions. However, I feel like if you have that many contractions they should have given you meds to ripen your cervix to help with the dilation because all those contractions for a few days could have stress your baby that’s why the baby pooped inside the womb.
Similar to my birth story, in that I had very long labor as well- once contractions started, it was two nights of not sleeping but trying to sleep while slouched over on my birthing ball :( contractions were close at 3 am one night but then completely slowed...I dont remember now if I tried doing different positions or not before I headed out to see midwife but I was exhausted. FINALLY, 24 hours later, they were at the 3 minute interval again...then in active labor, the only thing I could do was pace until my midwife said it was ok to try for a water birth. the water was great, but after an hour or so of pushing in the tub, she said it wasn't doing anything and that I should try to push on my back. another hour of pushing in that position and it was all finally over. ugh!
Oh man! Well I hope you and your baby are happy and healthy now. Seems like you went through a pretty tough time. Glad we could relate on the sleeping piece of birth too haha
I feel like your health professionals and birthing class did you such a disservice by not preparing you mentally better for birth. Understanding that all experiences aren’t the same, knowledge on active labor, and expectations when in labor such as this waxing and waning effect with contractions. It’s a lot mentally. But congratulations on your bundle!!!
I had a very similar birth stpry with my first child. 54 hours total and epidural was unsuccessful. They tried 3 times and couldn't get it to work. 😫 The labor was awful and i tore so bad they had to call in a plastic surgeon to stitch me up because i was rold it looked like the exit wound of a gunshot. 😬 My recovery took 3 months until I didn't have pain anymore. I knew I wanted another baby and thankfully my labor and delivery were both amazing that time...as well as the 3rd time. So much easier!!!
Typically Braxton Hicks don’t have a pattern and your cervix doesn’t dilate. Also they tend to stop if you move or get in different positions. They had a consistent pattern from the start, I did dilate, and they never stopped. Different people can call it different things though. This is just a story of my experience! 😊
So similar to mine, same amount of hours exactly. Only difference, i ended with cesarean. Also to the people claiming it's not labor till you're 4 cm dilated, that's bullshit! A whole day of pitocin turned as high as possible is definitely labor, and definitely painful, and doesn't always mean it's dilating the person as it should.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I am currently 33 weeks and i want to know about everything thst could happen so i can best advocate for myself and my baby from any unnecessary interventions, i want a natural birth the same way you did, and im so sorry that didnt happen for you, honestly i think you should be contacting the hospital management to complain that your wishes were not respected and its no wonder your labour lasted so long with so much negetivity surrounding you, fair play momma you did amazing ❤❤
How exciting for you! I’d definitely recommend a doula if you’re wanting a natural birth. Especially if you are going the hospital route! I also have a video on what I would have done differently. That may be helpful for you! I hope you have an amazing birth a healthy rest of your pregnancy❤️❤️
Sounds simulator mine except I don’t remember losing my mucus plug. My water broke at 7pm and I had my daughter 21 hours later. I had planned a natural birth, but wasn’t progressing. I got stuck at 2cm and 19 hours in i decided to do Pitocin and an hour after starting that decided to go ahead and get an epidural in case i were to have to get a c-section I would already be numb. I had the same pain in my back. I never felt any contractions in my stomach, but felt immense discomfort in my back (possibly cause a had a posterior placenta) I think is what it was called. Anyway, glad you got a healthy baby boy.
Generally, back pain during labor (and no belly pain) indicates the baby is posterior. It means the baby is head down but the back of their skull and their spine are pressing against your spine. Getting on all fours and arching and relaxing your back can encourage them to flip to anterior. Babies can and are born in posterior presentation -- they call them "sunny side up" or "stargazers" because when their head emerges they're look up at the sky (if you're lying on your back). Posterior lies also generally take longer to be born.
I had pitocin with no epidural and it was in labor for 4 days before the hospital was able to do anything only reason they did was cause my water broke then 23 hours after my water broke i had my baby ! It is possible!
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Heart Association’s Neonatal Resuscitation program, if baby is vigorous and crying at birth, you do not investigate for meconium aspiration. If baby is limp, without spontaneous respirations, they do suction.
My daughter was born in the hospital, by “ emergency C-section”….. because they saw meconium. She cried vigorously, and was whisked away from me, aspirated and put in nicu for 6 hrs. So…? Did they just not follow the rules?
I would blame the hospital and doctors for not taking this serious. Then you being so adamant about not having anything to help with the pain. This story is so wrong in so many ways…please new moms, don’t do this. Ask questions and get the best medical help…
Im so sorry people have been so rude to you in these comments. Im also so sorry you didnt get the birth preferences you desired i know how disappointing that can be & i know healthy mom and baby was your 1st priority but that doesn't take away the fact it can be disappointing. Even as a midwife i find Pitocin is so overused, im so sorry they upped it without your consent. and unnecessary induction even more so, its because they try and control numbers on the floor but ive known some hospitals to be bordering on harrasing, i also tend to limit cervical checks as much as possible to a degree as it can increase infection risk, it can be uncomfortable and it can be disappointing. You Can say no to any of these if you don't want to be checked permitting. You also can always say no to induction and pitocin, once its not medically necessary of course. Drs dont freely let you know that however. Its also hard to advocate for yourself in the moment i know that from experience. Also really sorry they didnt delay cord clamping that happened with my second last baby and like you they told me they did for 2min lol. Im guessing the shot she offered was pethidine not sure on the pills. All that to stay regardless to how you did it YOU DID IT. Just because this birth didnt go exactly how you hoped doesn't mean your next won't so please dont allow that to put you off. Ive had 7 all widely different births from my eldest being 10week early second was a 76hr pitocin labour, 2 with a failed epidural, 1 with a horrific episiotomy 1 failed induction which led to an emergency csection and last but not least a beautifully redeeming VBAC unmedicated bar gas and air with my last baby my point being your next birth could be exactly how you dream. Please look into gas and air for a pain relief option i dont know why America doesn't offer it. Im in ireland❤
Thank you so much for writing all of this! If only I could find someone like you in Texas to support me on my next birth❤️ truly appreciate all of this!
@CrunchyMomClub Your comment section truly made me angry, women should support eachother whether or which they agree with how you birth it is exactly that. I just wanted to say as a midwife & a mother I agree with your views on pitocin and I'm so sorry the nurses ignored some of your wishes. What you need is a nice doula/midwife who can strongly advocate for you during labour as when your in so much pain it is so easy to just agree with anything the drs & nurses say. For my last birth I had a beautiful midwife by sheer luck who had 30years experience and took no nonsense, she helped me acheive my beautiful redeeming birth. I hope your next birth is everything you wish for, I can't wait for you to birth without pitocin and feel the difference & definitely check out renting Gas & Air (Entonox) it's a game changer in my opinion. It takes you to a different dimension whilst your having a contraction but once you stop inhaling your right back to reality completely normal. And of course if you ever visit the emerald isle and want to give birth I'll be right there🤣 Thank-you for sharing your birth story I'm sure it's helped alot of women who want to prepare for what might happen
I think it’s important got women to find out about birth and know what’s all happening during labour before giving birth. You can feel so helpless. I read a lot of north stories and had a great midwife and had no fear giving birth. But if you don’t know what’s going to or might happen you can be freaked out. Congratulations.
Wow wow wow, im so sorry you had to go thru 86 hr.s of pain, but congrats. Next birth will be so diff. I had 3 premature babies, altho the first one a girl was the smallest and earliest at 6 wks early.
Sorry. You were not in active labour until your water broke. You had very powerful Braxton Hicks for days - as most Mums do. Fi a First Baby you had a normal timed labour, you didn't have forceps, it sounds like you did DN have an episiotomy, th unkindest cut. Birth plans are just that, a plan. But when it comes to the actual event your baby needs come first, these are people who do this stuff for a living. You wouldn't think if telling a mechanic, electrician or plumber how to do their job. In labour you hope for the best, but be prepared to have to change your plan for a healthy Baby and mother. Good luck with Baby number 2! X
Prodromal labor is a real thing. It’s not Braxton-Hicks, it’s just early labor. But you’re right, it’s not “active labor,” which usually begins at about four centimeters.
Yes, labor didn’t turn into active labor until hours after my water broke! I totally understand not telling the doctors what to do and yes it is there job! They are great in emergencies or when things go wrong. The more you learn about birth though, you’ll see how often doctors intervene in situations they don’t need to. Birth is usually simple and can be done without anyone’s help other than mom and baby. Thank you for listening to my story and for wishing me luck on baby #2!🤍
@@susanmocsnythomas1428 Prodromal labour is real, but it can't be "reacted to" in the way this woman did. It's essential to stay calm and relaxed, and keep things in perspective. The pain doesn't really start til you're at least 4cm. Before that is a cakewalk by comparison.
Any tips on preparing for a homebirth after an experience very similar to hers, only it'd also be a vbac . And also dealing with a high chance of having cholestisis again.
Thanks for sharing! You’re right about Pitocin! Everyone I know that got PIT, got an epidural. I did 46ish hours of labor 13 in the hospital… I was doing great! But I was a VBAC so the clock was ticking as soon as I got to the hospital. Also I was 42 weeks on the dot 😭😭😭and had been at a 8cm for 10 hours…. So I eventually got Pitocin. Typically @ my hospital, they start at a (2). I guess the flow level? I refused and only let them go up 1 at a time. Within 5 minutes of getting pitocin, I was only at 1, and I was screaming for that epidural. I didn’t care about anything but stopping the pain. It felt so unnatural The fact that pitocin is labeled as oxytocin at the hospital BLOWS MY MIND. it’s essentially the same chemical compound, but it can’t cross your blood brain barrier like REAL NATURAL oxytocin. So therefore it doesn’t have the same affects. There’s a reason pregnant women release a crazy amount of oxytocin in labor. We need those happy hormones to mask the pain, along with adrenaline. Anywaysssss I enjoyed listening to your story 🩷
Thank you for sharing all of that as well! I totally agree with everything about Pitocin… it’s crazy! And thanks for watching🤍 I was hoping other people could relate!
I was on pitocin for 19 hours with no epidural offered. For the last 12 hours, I had 1 constant contraction (no break). I almost did not have another baby because of the trauma. I was begging for a c section. To make it worse, he was stuck, I pushed for 3 hours only to have him pulled out of me via forceps and had a 4th degree tear. It was the worst experience of my life!😢
Im glad i went in with no expectations i just wanted a vaginal birth praying for no c-section. i ended up being too late for a epidural so i pushed my son out in 3, i pushed so hard i ripped but i just wanted to get my son out.
@@Sunflowers36 I think the only reason Pitocin affected me so drastically right away was because I was already laboring for almost 30 hours by the time I got it. But I have heard similar stories with induction
![โรงเรียนห้ามรัก โดนจับได้ตาย...!! [เอิร์นไดเม่]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/4u02Sbr556Q/mqdefault.jpg)
It’s a whole different game when they think the baby may have ingested meconium aspiration!! Medical staff must do what’s best for your child regardless of what your expectations were…
You should check out this podcast! open.spotify.com/episode/0blrYkGkDK2O5MjzRoSWFz?si=vqwTkv0iQ8WmJw93ykGTDw
It’s not the drugs in the epidural that cause you to go to sleep. It’s the total relaxation and lack of pain in your body.
It’s hard to say for certain either way!
@@CrunchyMomClub well, considering the drugs do not enter your circulation, but merely bathe the spinal nerves, I think they do know.
@@CrunchyMomClubUhhh no.. It’s pretty certain lol.
@@CrunchyMomClubbecause obviously you know better than thousands of doctors who spend decades researching.
Yes true! Because even with fentanyl and then epidural, I still couldn’t sleep because I was so excited to meet my baby 😂. All it does is take away the pain. Giving birth to my daughter was the most peaceful, enjoyable experience ❤
I’m an ultrasound tech…on that page where it said gender it meant your gender bc you are the patient, not the babies gender. She didn’t want you to look not because it had babies gender but because she probably didn’t want you to see that and get confused
Good to know! Haha I definitely didn’t realize it at the time.
Hey there! German midwife here and your video just popped up on my fyp. Thank you for telling your story ❤ I really am sorry your experience was not how you have wanted it to be. I understand and am sorry. Also I think some comments here are rather rude and not sensitive. This is a momma that wished her experience to be different and that is absolutely understandable.
If I am allowed to give you or any reader a little advise or suggestion as a midwife AND a mother: I was going for the most natural experience for my births as well and I know all the things that can happen in a delivery ward and the medical interventions happening or the things the hospital staff sometimes does not do to encourage a natural birth. So for me a hospital birth was not an option. I gave birth in a BIRTH CENTRE and my second was born AT HOME and it was THE BEST DECISION for me! So natural; I was self-determined, gave birth in upright positions, not forced to do anything I did not want to, was able to eat and drink and give birth in the water, no pushing on the belly or intense pushing the baby out, everybody respected all my decision like for example clamping the cord when the placenta is birthed etc. ☺
I can really really HIGHLY RECOMMEND a birth outside of the hospital to any healthy mother with a healthy pregnancy. There are so incredibly many advantages compared to a birth in the hospital, most certainly way less interventions and therefore no intervention cascade leading to more interventions leading to more complications and risks. Also outside-the-hospital births are not less safe! At least here in Germany a home birth is the safest way to give birth for several reasons (if the mother is healthy) ☺
If you or any other mom has got any questions please ask me! I am happy to help. 🧡 There are also so many beautiful home birth vlogs here on TH-cam, that can help you see the Beauty of home birth ☺
I’m a midwife, too, and as soon as I saw the hospital in the title and heard she wanted to do things natural, I thought “unfortunately, the hospital is not the best place for that.” I feel that just stepping into a hospital can change the whole experience for the woman.
@@lrbolotin1227 absolutely!!
Thank you so much for writing all of this! I really appreciate it ❤️ I’m currently pregnant with my second and planning a home birth! I think things will be much different this time around!
@@CrunchyMomClub that's fantastic! Congratulations and I wish you a beautiful, gentle and wonderful delivery of your baby. 💜
Unfortunately where I live home births are not a thing. I'm pregnant with my second and all I wanted was to stay at home as long as possible, but this time I have diabetes so I have to get an induction this week and I'm terrified I already feel like I'm not going to be in control of anything.
Just to be clear, so that other first timers don't get the wrong idea ... no one has an 80+ hour labour. Labour doesn't start until you're 4cm dilated. It's SO important to stress that, so energy isn't wasted freaking out about those early and relatively mild contractions.
Oh man yeah this is not meant to freak out any first time mamas! I think there are so many lessons to learn from my experience. I do disagree on the dilation though. From my research, dilation really doesn’t tell you much unfortunately.
It's true that no one is in active labor for 80+ hours, but that does not mean that the hours/days of contractions before that are "mild." I had contractions less than 10 minutes apart for 84 hours - it was early labor until the last 8-10, but strong and frequent enough contractions that I could not sleep through them and had to vocalize. Of course I also don't say this to scare anyone, I ended up having an unmedicated birth on the toilet with no tearing and an easy recovery. But I was so, so tired! I'm glad I knew enough not to panic about the length of it so I didn't end up with unnecessary interventions.
@@CrunchyMomClub That's fine. I'm in obstetrics so I'm just telling what the professional position is. Around the world, labour isn't considered active (ie actual labour) until at least 4cm. Prior to that is 'pre-labour'. Basically just ripening the cervix.
I agree that dilation doesn't tell you much about how you're progressing, unless you check several times, over a period of time. A single read can only tell you whether you're in active labour or not.
As for how we individually respond to pre-labour, that's mind stuff. Some first timers ignore it completely, carry on with their day, and arrive at hospital at 9cm dilated and feeling pushy. Because our response differs according to our personality and attitude, our presentations are all different. Unfortunately many first timers do 'fight' the pain, which makes it considerably worse, AND slows progress.
She was very clear about HER experience and it sounds like it was indeed a long 86 hour labor. Meconium is also frequent. It is absolutely FALSE that labour doesn't "begin" until your 4cm dilated. Every woman every prengnacy is unique. I've given birth eight times. The hardest part of my labour for me personally is reaching 4cm I typically spend 90 of my total laboring time getting to 4cm once I hit 4 I tend to hit 10cm deliver within 30 mins (with or without epidural) labour isn't a cookie cutter one size fits all.
@@leannd9072 Sure, and HER experience was HERS. Like I said, it's quite subjective. But in the business we DO have firm criteria, whether you like it or not.
And no matter what you prefer to believe, we only consider it active labour from 4cm. Whatever happens before that, is just preparation for that labour. In your case (and in my own, with my own three births), there is a day or so of pre-labour, and very quick active labour. For other women it might be just a few hours of pre-labour, then many hours of active labour. None of which changes the 4cm thing. As you yourself said, it's different for every woman ... but every woman is still regarded as not in labour until 4cm.
I can sense the disappointment of things not going the way you'd hope in the end but you should be so so proud of yourself for this birth!! There were many times when you couldve given up (and many women do) much earlier in your labor and you didn't. It was smart to stay home as long as you could and I loved how you continued to advocate for yourself and your baby (turning down medications/interventions) whenever you could. You were a very informed first time mom and it shows! I had a shorter labor but a very similar first time birth so I can relate to the feelings of disappointment and frustration. You learn as much as you can going into it but there's nothing that can really prepare you mentally and spiritually for birth until you go through it! I just wanted to offer some encouragement and words of wisdom (that you don't have to listen to because I'm a stranger on the internet lol) BUT birth is more spiritual than anything else. A lot of what makes a "successful" unmedicated/"natural" birth experience is the understanding that you must surrender to it fully. And hold space for the instinctual mother to come out and do the work. Remaining in a dark, quiet space. Keeping the labor private (not telling a bunch of people or inviting a bunch of energies into your home). Not "thinking" so much about what you should be doing or the timing or really anything that requires actual thought at all. The more your conscious brain does, the less space there is for your subconscious, instinctual brain to continue pumping the right hormones and leading your body to move your baby out. All the vaginal checks often do nothing but disappoint. And honestly, they are accurate or reliable as the cervix is a sphincter, it can open and close... alot of people don't know that. Anywho, I hope that one day you feel comfortable enough to try again! Birth can still be magical and beautiful! Good luck to you!
You’re so sweet! Thank you for saying all of that. I agree with it all and I’m so glad you could relate to it❤️
This is such a beautiful comment and so true. We are made to do this and our bodies and our babies know how.
I’m so sorry your experience was so much different than you desired for your birth but way to go for allowing it to move you forward rather than making you fearful for the future. My third birth was incredibly redeeming and I hope you will be able to have the same experience with your next baby!
That’s so awesome to hear! Thank you for sharing that❤️
Back labor is extremely painful. I had back labor for my first and I went through early labor for weeks. I remember I went into the hospital and they told me I was 4 cm but not contracting regularly enough I could stay at hospital or I could go home so I went home and I literally stayed pregnant and miserable for the next 10 days with back labor and contractions the whole way! Very frustrating and painful. Finally had her in a very fast natural birth 10 days after. That was 25 years ago when they didn't interfere with labor as much. Back labor is agonizing and confusing for the first pregnancy. I literally just felt like my back was breaking and I constantly had pressure like I had to go poop 😅 I spent a lot of time in the tub and in the shower trying to relieve the pain. Glad that you still kind of had a surprise with the gender and that he was healthy ❤️
Oh wow your story is crazy! That must have been so tough mentally and physically. Thank you for sharing that!
Labor starts when you are in active labor, not from your first contraction. From 4-5 cm on. You did so well but I’m sorry about the gender thing, but healthy baby and healthy mom is most important.
Hmm interesting I’ve never heard it that way!
@@CrunchyMomClubYes, that is correct. Congratulations on your baby boy! I can remember my grandmother telling me that she had contractions like you did for a solid seven days. I had a baby that had meconium when my water broke. Like you he was whisked away for them to suction him to make sure he didn’t aspirate any. Unfortunately he did and ended up in the NICU due to a bacterial infection in his lungs from it. He had to stay for two weeks and it was so hard leaving him there. I was able to take my breast milk and they bottle fed it to him but because I wasn’t able to be there every 3 hours for two weeks to feed him because I had a terrible tear that required them to stitch two layers and I had so many stitches it was almost impossible for me to sit that by the time he came home he would not breast feed. We tried everything. I was heartbroken. Between that and my extensive wound care that I was having to go through to heal it sent me into PPD. It was the most difficult recovery. I tell everyone that it was worse than my C-section. It’s a whole different hurt from having an incision on your stomach to having a cut down there that goes from one hole to the next and they still had to use forceps to get this little 4 lbs 12 oz baby out of you. Those little boys can give us a difficult long labor. Both of my boys did. One emergency C-section and one 36 hour labor. My 3 girls labors were beautiful and easy. I pray your next labor is speedy and smooth. ❤❤❤
@@CrunchyMomClub Seriously? They didn't tell you that in birthing classes? It should be common knowledge.
google says labour starts when you start feeling your first contractions?
@@xl0vex97x don’t believe everything that you read on google, labor is defined as uterine contractions that are long enough and strong enough to make cervical change, usually diagnosed by cervical exams.
Thank you for sharing your story!!! And congratulations on your sweet baby. As a doula I'm sorry that some of your wishes weren't heard or respected (them changing the Pitocin without your consent, not delaying cord clamping longer, etc) but I pray that your next birth experience can be more positive in your eyes. Everyone's labor is so unique and there is so much to learn from the stories. Thank you for being brave and vulnerable enough to share yours :)
You are so sweet! Thank you for such kind words. I definitely should have hired a doula for my birth and I recommend one for anyone trying to have a natural birth. I’m thankful for what you do🤍
I can’t understand this animus you have toward the medical profession. You look at them as your enemy. It seems also that you wanted to control every aspect of the birth. Your body will do what it needs to do and you certainly cannot hurry it along. Worrying about your labor bc you weren’t making progress probably turned into anxiety which is difficult to control. I hope for your next birth you try to relax and listen to your body. It’s okay if you have a long delivery. And please think of the baby before refusing pitocin which would have made all the difference. It’s okay to have medical intervention bc your body needed it. From a mother of three, remember “it is what it is” so just go along with any changes and trust the medical profession. They really have your best interest at heart. ❤️
Thank you for watching and commenting. I do have a bit of animosity towards birth healthcare professionals. I’ve done a lot of research and in my opinion birth workers do more harm than good in many cases🥴. I don’t think it’s done maliciously and I also know most won’t agree with that statement.
You’re right about not needing to worry or hurry things! I do need to relax and listen to my body next time!
Sending much love your way. ❤
@@CrunchyMomClubSo you did so much research that you think they are doing damage but not enough to know what labor is like?
my daughter is 38 wks along....she has a birth plan very much like yours. She is adamant that everything must go according to her plan. Natural, no drugs...She has hired a birth doula to be sure her wishes are respected. I'm so glad to have seen your video. and feel very much less stressed about what to possibly expect. I personally had three babies, all with epidural...and have a hard time thinking I will be seeing my daughter in such pain. Thanks for sharing your birth experience.
Oh how exciting for your daughter! I definitely think having a doula would have helps tremendously so I’m happy she is doing that! Good luck to her and you❤️
What you saw on the screen was probably referring to your gender.
@@pwear2528What? What other gender would the mother be?
I get wanting a natural birth and all, but please Mother's you need to think of the baby and thier health. Your only want is to get the baby out asap, especially after the water has been broken.
I totally agree the babies health is most important, but your water can be broken without complications! I’ve actually heard stories of women’s water being open for a week and the baby was fine🤯🤯 it’s all about the mom and babies exact circumstances and what decisions she wants to make!
You can still have a natural birth after your waters break. Having a preference doesn't negate from your 1st priority being healthy baby and mom. Please don't try insinuate this lady or any other lady wanting as natural a birth as possible is risking either theirs or their baby's health by having a preference. Just because a natural birth isn't as strong of a preference for you doesn't mean it isn't for another or that either of you are wtong
It's so great of you to share this story. You're a brave woman. It sucks that so many people didn't respect your wishes and you felt so much pressure to do things you didn't want. That midwife was not great, sorry to say. Your instincts were great and you should be proud you warriored through.
A peaceful and loving, joyful atmosphere brings your oxytocin which increases labor, and no one helped that happen. You were treated so badly. I'm so sorry it wasn't your ideal birth. I'd really suggest getting a duola next time. A duola is your protective bubble to make sure you have the experience you wanted. You'll tell her everything you envision ahead of time so you don't have to think and make the decisions in labor. She can also be your coach and support your husband. I'm so glad to hear your positive outlook and wish the best for you.
Thanks for listening to my story! You’re so right about the doula. I definitely should have had one and definitely looking into one next time around ❤️
Also, the reason you progressed so fast once you had the epidural, is because you were no longer over reacting to the discomfort of early labour. Your stress levels were so high that adrenaline blocked the prostaglandins necessary for progress. This happens when we have an extreme response to pain.
Early labour is uncomfortable for everyone. It's not painful in the way labour is, but it's not painless either. It's our response which matters. The pain is basically the same for everyone, but we all respond to it differently.
You know it’s crazy how different people can feel during labor. It really depends on a lot of thinks like if you have back labor or not, where your baby is positioned, and even the alignment of your own body. Early labor is intense for some and for others they have no idea isn’t even happening!
Another thing to think about is how Pitocin plays a role in speeding up labor. Typically, from my research, epidurals can make labor slow down.
I also said many time the back labor was the only real “pain” I was feeling. Although my labor was long, I was extremely calm, quiet, and relaxed through contractions. I hope that’s comforting for moms!
Why are you so rude to this lady? Your comments sound like your projecting some sort of anger towards her. She didn't over react to the pain whatsoever. That's really unkind to phrase it like that. How dare you say she over reacted based on a pain that you are not in her body feeling.
That's incorrect the pain isn't the same for everyone or every labour. I would know this because I've given birth 7times and each early labour was very different in terms of pain. I have given birth in my 20s, 30s and my last at almost 40 all vastly different. I'm also a registered Irish midwife currently on extended maternity leave
@@wednesday9623 Because first timers need as much information as possible. They need to know that it's not productive to stress too much during early labour.
@pm2886 Your comment is giving first timers false information saying the pain is the same for everyone just how we react to it. That is not true. Every birth is different. Your attitude and the way you speak down to people and their birth choices is what's not productive
@@wednesday9623 Yes, exactly. Every birth is different, because every woman is different - and different at different times in her life. The birth process (barring complications) however, is pretty much always the same. How we PERCEIVE the process is unique to us, and to the time in our life.
That's the reality, and that's what women need to know. They don't need to know that the birth process differs wildly from woman to woman, and birth to birth. Imagine how terrifying that is to a first timer ... to hear that she could be unlucky enough to have an excrutiatingly painful 80 hour labour - one more painful than anyone else's? That's a very inconsiderate falsehood to impose on young women. They need to know that's not reality.
There was so much you could have done to move things alone faster. And you should have considered starting the pitocin sooner if your baby had had their first poop.
Also an epidural works a whole lot better than flash cards!!
Oh man I agree. I think staying home longer would have made my labor shorter, but you live and learn. Pitocin just wasn’t my number one choice due to all the known risks.
Also interesting fact that most people don’t know is that meconium is not actually poop. Anyways sorry for your experience. Praying you have a different outcome if you give birth again! 🤍
What?? No. You do realise that forcing your body to contract when it doesn't naturally want to is the fastest way to distress a baby? It's a synthetic hormone, that would only speed up her chance of an emergency c-section anyone thats had a birth without pitocin to conpare will tell you its horrificly more painful. Also not everyone wants an epidural neither does it work for everyone. Have you actually tried flash cards?
You are so rude just because her birth preferences don't align with yours.
My first birth was very similar! 4 days (or nights I should say) of prodromal labor. I was SO EXHAUSTED. I didn’t get pitocin to induce but we did do the midwives brew of castor oil. Which messed with my baby’s heart rate. I still did have a natural birth like I wanted but I did end up in the hospital and was traumatized by the nurses there bullying us. I am now expecting my 4th baby. It gets easier(as in shorter). Every birth is different!
That’s not fun, but super exciting to hear about your 4th!! Congratulations ❤️
It is so common to hear about nurses bullying. My daughter just had a baby but she went to a birth clinic but her best friend went to a hospital and totally had a horrible time dealing with very mean nurses that would not honor her plan. So frustrating. I really hope that the birthing industry gets a big shake-up. It needs it. It's so different from when I was having my kids 20 + years ago
I am surprised with your attitude towards this. Seems like you tortured yourself for 80 hours "birthing the RIGHT way", then you finally listened to those terrible doctors and you had the rest of the birth fast and easy. Don't you think that if you went with pytosin and epidural you would have a very different positive experience and by day 5 be already home with your baby boy?
I don’t think there is any “right” way to birth. I also don’t think the doctors are dumb, I think they are doing exactly what they are trained to do.
I totally see how it seemed like I tortured myself and I think I even mentioned that! There were a ton of positives and things I learned through the birth I had. Pitocin and an epidural are just not what I personally think are best for mama and baby! (Depending on the circumstances of course😊)
@@CrunchyMomClub this is what I don't get. After everything YOU have been through why do YOU (not what some random doula on the internet) think epidurals and pitocin are not a good idea?
@@piaaapsiiiyou've answered your own question because of HER experience.
Now answer me this, why are you so nasty to try and belittle a woman on the internet for her birth preferences?
Have you birthed a baby without pitocin or a epidural? I have had both and I would go through birth another 7 times without either because for ME it's my preference. There are risks associated with pitocin and guess what? I'm a registered hospital midwife.
There is no right way to birth, I pray you find healing before life humbles you
@@wednesday9623 you know what you're right. My choice of words was not the kindest indeed. I do apologize!
My goal was to understand better what she drew her conclusions on. She is highly oposed to pytosin and epidurals, which in her case seemed to help (from her own story). I kept hearing messages that are highly popular around social media. We all do reasearch, not all of us have practical personal experience and I believe the goal of this video is to share the latter. Yet, this is what is missing for me here - the connection between what was previously researched, which built her expectations for birth and how these expectations are not changed from this very different experience she eventually had.
@piaaapsiii Pitocin forces the body to contract unnaturally, so the experience is alot more painful and there are many side effects. Epidural also comes with a lot of side effects which is why alot of women especially in other country's try not to use them. The point also was the pitocin drip was turned up without her consent. She feels like now reflecting she didn't need either but they were pushed apon her. I am on the side of youtube as I'm a midwife in Ireland and a mother of 7 and I'm always curious to hear of people's birth experiences especially in a different country. When I read the comments there was so many negative ones against her birth preferences, I suspect because of the word crunchy in her username which is ridiculous. I felt compelled to come to the comments and defend this lovely woman, as there is no correct way to birth and everyone's experience is valid. Your apology of your choice of words is very refreshing alot of people instead of taking accountability go on the defence. So it's nice to have a discussion with another woman who i can tell has empathy. Are you considering birthing with/without pitocin? I have birthed with & without if you have any questions I would love to answer them for you❤️
Ive had six babies. The last one kinda went like this. I do want to tell anyone thats reading these comments that my painfull back labor and long labor ended up being because baby was posterior. awful back labor. I wasnt actually even dilating. only 1 cm when getting to the hospital (all of my other babies I was dilated to at least a 7 when i got in to the hospital). What I learned is how important it is to get baby into the optimal position way in advance! The contractions are happening because your body is trying to move the baby into the right position. Its so painful because baby is pushing on your back and thats also why theres no dilation. It sounds like this baby was a big boy so he couldnt make the turn which is why its so important to start getting the baby in the correct position earlier. So, in third trimester (or sooner) no reclining, Do hands and knees 15 min a day (it gets baby out of posterior position and teaches them how to enter the birth canal) I can actually feel baby moving down after ten min of hands and knees. If baby still isnt getting out of posterior position or any of the other weird positions that babies get into then spinning babies really helps tell you which exercises to do and in what order (order is very important!!). I think the reason babies get in these positions so frequently now is because we live such sedentary lives. Women used to do a lot more laborious tasks throughout the day. Anyway, exercise is SO good for positioning during pregnancy. Sitting a lot is bad. If you do sit, sit with your knees lower than your hips/pelvis. Hope this helps someone! Im pregnant with baby number seven and I pray this one goes smoothly!!
Oh my goodness thank you so much for writing all of this🤍 such good insight! Definitely keeping this in the back of my mind for my next baby!
Also congratulations on your 7th baby. How amazing!!!
My suggestion to you would be go to midwife next time and take all the classes they offer you and don't read stuff online about "what you should" expect. Every baby and every labor is different.
Great advice! Definitely going the midwife route next time!
I think you did amazing! Considering how long the labor was, you should be really proud of yourself. Thank you for sharing your story and remaining positive. I was able to have unmedicated birth first time around but now with baby #2 learning more about different experiences that other women have and it is good to be prepared for something unplanned. Your birth story also reminded me how important it is to rest and sleep while you still can do this. ❤
Thank you for watching and sharing! Congratulations on baby number 2! I hope you have another beautiful unmedicated birth❤️
You're a patient woman. My husband would not be getting sleep like that! They may not carry the baby...but they helped make them. I'm sorry but I'd have to say get your ass up 😂 you must have said 5 times this man was sleeping...like sleep away the hard part...until it's time for the baby....what??
With that said. I'm sorry you went through such a traumatic birth. Us women are superheroes for sure!!
Haha he was helpful, but also yes he did sleep. I did make him get up multiple time lol. I don’t think men will ever fully understand.
@@CrunchyMomClubmine did the same thing. Annoying as hell…!
What kind of doctor would let you labor for that long? Thankful that your baby is alive😊
I’m glad I have a healthy baby too, but I don’t blame the doctors for my labor!
My exact thoughts too!!
I had back labor with both my kids ,it's a longer harder labor
Sorry about that! I feel your pain
Great story sweet mommy!
Thank you❤️
Congratulations on your new little miracle. Labor is not for the weak for sure....I had a daughter,56 hrs of HARD labor-contractions were 2 minutes apart for most of that time and a son,69 hrs with 1 1/2 minutes between contractions for 40 of those hours. There was no medication at all for either bc I was just terrified of the drugs hurting my baby. Our daughter was 8'5oz and our son was 9'5oz.
I hope your next labor goes faster for you, but at least now you know-IT IS WORTH IT ALL!!!! 🥰
Yes it is worth it! Thank you for sharing with me. Isn’t birth crazy?!
@@CrunchyMomClub Crazy and Beautiful! 🥰
I was thinking about the gender thing. I wonder if it was your identifying patient information which would state female.
Probably! I just truly thought it was the babies sex haha!
Sorry....but if you're having contractions every minute why are they starting to give you pitocin? That makes no sense to me 😮😮😮
Congratulations 🎊 👏 💐 🥳
Haha I still don’t know the answer to that one…
Because they weren't established labour contractions. They weren't doing anything.
This was certainly a long and annoying labor… but I’m sorry but this video didn’t need to be prefaced with a look away warning. Your birth sounded wonderful. Congratulations
I had 5 minutes to come to terms with having to have a c-section and then my baby was taken from my belly. Which was traumatic and I still cry about it.
Oh man I’m so sorry that happened to you! I hope if you have more babies things will be different.
I totally get how your birth seemed way more traumatic than mine, but that doesn’t take away from how my birth felt for me. I prefaced the video for any new mamas looking for positive, unmedicated birth.
Again I’m so sorry for what happened to you. I truly wouldn’t wish that for any mom!❤️
Gender page might have been YOUR GENDER…🤔😉
Lol yeah maybe. It just seemed weird to have to put female considering anyone giving birth is a female🙃
Myself and my partner had planned to do a gender reveal with family and had asked the hospital not to give us the gender but it did say 'Female' on one of the forms and it did turn out to be relating to MY gender so probably was refering to yours too 😂
@@CrunchyMomClub it’s the way the machine is set up with patient info, it has your name, gender, date of birth, etc. I’m an ultrasound tech. Where it said female was your gender, not the babies. Ultrasound machines are also used to do exams on males so all machines have a line that identifies patient gender.
@@CrunchyMomClub no trans men and non binary have babies too..
Active labor when contractions consistently last at least 45 seconds 3 mins apart. You may not be dilated enough so there are interventions they need to do or emergency c sections, but you’re not having active labor if you’re able to walk it off and do things to make your contraction better. Usually when you’re close to having labor, you’ll feel contractions. However, I feel like if you have that many contractions they should have given you meds to ripen your cervix to help with the dilation because all those contractions for a few days could have stress your baby that’s why the baby pooped inside the womb.
Thanks for watching! I’m pregnant with baby #2 so I’m excited for this next birth!
What was your husband thinking going to work while your wife is in labour… that would be instant divorce papers.
Lol 😂
Similar to my birth story, in that I had very long labor as well- once contractions started, it was two nights of not sleeping but trying to sleep while slouched over on my birthing ball :( contractions were close at 3 am one night but then completely slowed...I dont remember now if I tried doing different positions or not before I headed out to see midwife but I was exhausted. FINALLY, 24 hours later, they were at the 3 minute interval again...then in active labor, the only thing I could do was pace until my midwife said it was ok to try for a water birth. the water was great, but after an hour or so of pushing in the tub, she said it wasn't doing anything and that I should try to push on my back. another hour of pushing in that position and it was all finally over. ugh!
Oh man! Well I hope you and your baby are happy and healthy now. Seems like you went through a pretty tough time. Glad we could relate on the sleeping piece of birth too haha
I feel like your health professionals and birthing class did you such a disservice by not preparing you mentally better for birth. Understanding that all experiences aren’t the same, knowledge on active labor, and expectations when in labor such as this waxing and waning effect with contractions. It’s a lot mentally. But congratulations on your bundle!!!
Thank you! Yeah there are a lot of things I wish I knew, but I’m grateful for all the things I learned through the experience!
I had a very similar birth stpry with my first child. 54 hours total and epidural was unsuccessful. They tried 3 times and couldn't get it to work. 😫 The labor was awful and i tore so bad they had to call in a plastic surgeon to stitch me up because i was rold it looked like the exit wound of a gunshot. 😬 My recovery took 3 months until I didn't have pain anymore. I knew I wanted another baby and thankfully my labor and delivery were both amazing that time...as well as the 3rd time. So much easier!!!
Oh my goodness!!! I’m so sorry about that, but wow how awesome to here it got better for you. That’s so awesome to here❤️
Did her water break 85 hours before birth or was she just having braxton hicks aka early labor for 3 days????
Typically Braxton Hicks don’t have a pattern and your cervix doesn’t dilate. Also they tend to stop if you move or get in different positions.
They had a consistent pattern from the start, I did dilate, and they never stopped. Different people can call it different things though. This is just a story of my experience! 😊
Hicks for three days. It's not uncommon. And yes, they commonly efface and dilate the cervix a few cms.
So similar to mine, same amount of hours exactly. Only difference, i ended with cesarean. Also to the people claiming it's not labor till you're 4 cm dilated, that's bullshit! A whole day of pitocin turned as high as possible is definitely labor, and definitely painful, and doesn't always mean it's dilating the person as it should.
@@CrunchyMomClub Some women in active labor & transition have no pattern whatsoever.
@@pm2886 I had hicks for weeeeeks but had a very short birth.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I am currently 33 weeks and i want to know about everything thst could happen so i can best advocate for myself and my baby from any unnecessary interventions, i want a natural birth the same way you did, and im so sorry that didnt happen for you, honestly i think you should be contacting the hospital management to complain that your wishes were not respected and its no wonder your labour lasted so long with so much negetivity surrounding you, fair play momma you did amazing ❤❤
How exciting for you! I’d definitely recommend a doula if you’re wanting a natural birth. Especially if you are going the hospital route!
I also have a video on what I would have done differently. That may be helpful for you!
I hope you have an amazing birth a healthy rest of your pregnancy❤️❤️
Sounds simulator mine except I don’t remember losing my mucus plug. My water broke at 7pm and I had my daughter 21 hours later. I had planned a natural birth, but wasn’t progressing. I got stuck at 2cm and 19 hours in i decided to do Pitocin and an hour after starting that decided to go ahead and get an epidural in case i were to have to get a c-section I would already be numb. I had the same pain in my back. I never felt any contractions in my stomach, but felt immense discomfort in my back (possibly cause a had a posterior placenta) I think is what it was called. Anyway, glad you got a healthy baby boy.
Generally, back pain during labor (and no belly pain) indicates the baby is posterior. It means the baby is head down but the back of their skull and their spine are pressing against your spine. Getting on all fours and arching and relaxing your back can encourage them to flip to anterior. Babies can and are born in posterior presentation -- they call them "sunny side up" or "stargazers" because when their head emerges they're look up at the sky (if you're lying on your back). Posterior lies also generally take longer to be born.
Thank you! I hope if you have more babies you can get that natural birth you were hoping for!
Really???
Haha really!
@@CrunchyMomClub❤😂❤
I had pitocin with no epidural and it was in labor for 4 days before the hospital was able to do anything only reason they did was cause my water broke then 23 hours after my water broke i had my baby ! It is possible!
Oh my goodness, how crazy! I’ve never heard a story like that. Good for you!!
Damn my labor was 84 hours and I've been waiting to hear someone beat me :P
Oh wow!! It’s wild how long labor can be and how different it is for every person!
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Heart Association’s Neonatal Resuscitation program, if baby is vigorous and crying at birth, you do not investigate for meconium aspiration. If baby is limp, without spontaneous respirations, they do suction.
Wow I did not know that!
My daughter was born in the hospital, by “ emergency C-section”….. because they saw meconium.
She cried vigorously, and was whisked away from me, aspirated and put in nicu for 6 hrs.
So…?
Did they just not follow the rules?
@@CrunchyMomClub- please read my comment….!❤
I would blame the hospital and doctors for not taking this serious. Then you being so adamant about not having anything to help with the pain. This story is so wrong in so many ways…please new moms, don’t do this. Ask questions and get the best medical help…
Im so sorry people have been so rude to you in these comments.
Im also so sorry you didnt get the birth preferences you desired i know how disappointing that can be & i know healthy mom and baby was your 1st priority but that doesn't take away the fact it can be disappointing.
Even as a midwife i find Pitocin is so overused, im so sorry they upped it without your consent. and unnecessary induction even more so, its because they try and control numbers on the floor but ive known some hospitals to be bordering on harrasing, i also tend to limit cervical checks as much as possible to a degree as it can increase infection risk, it can be uncomfortable and it can be disappointing. You Can say no to any of these if you don't want to be checked permitting. You also can always say no to induction and pitocin, once its not medically necessary of course. Drs dont freely let you know that however.
Its also hard to advocate for yourself in the moment i know that from experience.
Also really sorry they didnt delay cord clamping that happened with my second last baby and like you they told me they did for 2min lol.
Im guessing the shot she offered was pethidine not sure on the pills.
All that to stay regardless to how you did it YOU DID IT. Just because this birth didnt go exactly how you hoped doesn't mean your next won't so please dont allow that to put you off. Ive had 7 all widely different births from my eldest being 10week early second was a 76hr pitocin labour, 2 with a failed epidural, 1 with a horrific episiotomy 1 failed induction which led to an emergency csection and last but not least a beautifully redeeming VBAC unmedicated bar gas and air with my last baby my point being your next birth could be exactly how you dream. Please look into gas and air for a pain relief option i dont know why America doesn't offer it. Im in ireland❤
Thank you so much for writing all of this! If only I could find someone like you in Texas to support me on my next birth❤️ truly appreciate all of this!
@CrunchyMomClub Your comment section truly made me angry, women should support eachother whether or which they agree with how you birth it is exactly that. I just wanted to say as a midwife & a mother I agree with your views on pitocin and I'm so sorry the nurses ignored some of your wishes. What you need is a nice doula/midwife who can strongly advocate for you during labour as when your in so much pain it is so easy to just agree with anything the drs & nurses say. For my last birth I had a beautiful midwife by sheer luck who had 30years experience and took no nonsense, she helped me acheive my beautiful redeeming birth. I hope your next birth is everything you wish for, I can't wait for you to birth without pitocin and feel the difference & definitely check out renting Gas & Air (Entonox) it's a game changer in my opinion. It takes you to a different dimension whilst your having a contraction but once you stop inhaling your right back to reality completely normal. And of course if you ever visit the emerald isle and want to give birth I'll be right there🤣 Thank-you for sharing your birth story I'm sure it's helped alot of women who want to prepare for what might happen
I think it’s important got women to find out about birth and know what’s all happening during labour before giving birth. You can feel so helpless. I read a lot of north stories and had a great midwife and had no fear giving birth. But if you don’t know what’s going to or might happen you can be freaked out. Congratulations.
Yes totally agree and thank you❤️
You poor dear. Next time go for epidural. Four days took too much out of you. Blessings
I praying for a much shorter labor next time! Thank you for watching❤️
Wow wow wow, im so sorry you had to go thru 86 hr.s of pain, but congrats. Next birth will be so diff. I had 3 premature babies, altho the first one a girl was the smallest and earliest at 6 wks early.
Oh wow! That’s crazy. I hope all your babies are doing well!
Sorry. You were not in active labour until your water broke. You had very powerful Braxton Hicks for days - as most Mums do. Fi a First Baby you had a normal timed labour, you didn't have forceps, it sounds like you did DN have an episiotomy, th unkindest cut. Birth plans are just that, a plan. But when it comes to the actual event your baby needs come first, these are people who do this stuff for a living. You wouldn't think if telling a mechanic, electrician or plumber how to do their job. In labour you hope for the best, but be prepared to have to change your plan for a healthy Baby and mother. Good luck with Baby number 2! X
Prodromal labor is a real thing. It’s not Braxton-Hicks, it’s just early labor. But you’re right, it’s not “active labor,” which usually begins at about four centimeters.
Yes, labor didn’t turn into active labor until hours after my water broke! I totally understand not telling the doctors what to do and yes it is there job! They are great in emergencies or when things go wrong. The more you learn about birth though, you’ll see how often doctors intervene in situations they don’t need to. Birth is usually simple and can be done without anyone’s help other than mom and baby. Thank you for listening to my story and for wishing me luck on baby #2!🤍
@@susanmocsnythomas1428 Prodromal labour is real, but it can't be "reacted to" in the way this woman did. It's essential to stay calm and relaxed, and keep things in perspective. The pain doesn't really start til you're at least 4cm. Before that is a cakewalk by comparison.
Try homebirth next time…
I will!
@@CrunchyMomClub awesome! Freebirth? 😉
Any tips on preparing for a homebirth after an experience very similar to hers, only it'd also be a vbac . And also dealing with a high chance of having cholestisis again.
I had three daughters my first in hospital didn’t like the experience next two at home and it was fantastic,congratulations on your bundle of joy ❤
Thanks for sharing!
You’re right about Pitocin! Everyone I know that got PIT, got an epidural. I did 46ish hours of labor 13 in the hospital… I was doing great! But I was a VBAC so the clock was ticking as soon as I got to the hospital. Also I was 42 weeks on the dot 😭😭😭and had been at a 8cm for 10 hours…. So I eventually got Pitocin. Typically @ my hospital, they start at a (2). I guess the flow level? I refused and only let them go up 1 at a time. Within 5 minutes of getting pitocin, I was only at 1, and I was screaming for that epidural. I didn’t care about anything but stopping the pain. It felt so unnatural
The fact that pitocin is labeled as oxytocin at the hospital BLOWS MY MIND. it’s essentially the same chemical compound, but it can’t cross your blood brain barrier like REAL NATURAL oxytocin. So therefore it doesn’t have the same affects. There’s a reason pregnant women release a crazy amount of oxytocin in labor. We need those happy hormones to mask the pain, along with adrenaline.
Anywaysssss
I enjoyed listening to your story 🩷
Thank you for sharing all of that as well! I totally agree with everything about Pitocin… it’s crazy!
And thanks for watching🤍 I was hoping other people could relate!
I was on pitocin for 19 hours with no epidural offered. For the last 12 hours, I had 1 constant contraction (no break). I almost did not have another baby because of the trauma. I was begging for a c section. To make it worse, he was stuck, I pushed for 3 hours only to have him pulled out of me via forceps and had a 4th degree tear. It was the worst experience of my life!😢
Im glad i went in with no expectations i just wanted a vaginal birth praying for no c-section. i ended up being too late for a epidural so i pushed my son out in 3, i pushed so hard i ripped but i just wanted to get my son out.
@@Sunflowers36 I think the only reason Pitocin affected me so drastically right away was because I was already laboring for almost 30 hours by the time I got it.
But I have heard similar stories with induction
My mom did Pitocin with no epidural. It can be done! I always tell her what a feat that is!