So, we have been nominated for Podcast of the Year at the bCreator Awards!! If you could spare a couple of minutes and vote for us here, that would mean a lot to us: www.bcreator.co.uk/awards/ Thank you 🙏🏼
If you’re are planning a sexual or romantic relationship, it would be very good to mention your health condition before any sex takes place and before the romantic feelings go too far. Pick a quiet time when you will have a chance to tell them about it, discuss the situation and they can ask questions. Tell them what to expect with your health condition and be honest. You need a partner to hear you and be involved in the conversation. It's not worth just having someone if they aren't also caring for who you are entirely. You're completely worth having someone love you for everything you are, including your health issues. When you first discuss your health condition is the time to find out if this partner will be there for you.
Voted. It's marvelous what you two are providing for an under-served community. The thing is, the thoughts and advice you share easily pertain to all of us, LGBTQ+ or straight. You make social media a more inclusive place to be. Whether you win the award or not, thank you for your exceptional contributions.
I am a 65 y o gay male. There was a video about scrambled eggs you posted. The secret to scrambled eggs is LOW, SLOW and KEEP IT MOVING. I took that and use it in everyday life now, especially. When working out! Thank you for your words of wisdom. All blessings to you both!
I think you two said it all. Yes, you need to provide the information before things get serious. But, not before you've established a connection. Definitely avoid finances until you hear wedding bells. Or the very least are moving in together with someone. There are bad people who do terrible things for money. So be extremely cautious when bringing up that subject.
Yes!!! And I would go a step further and make sure that that money is somehow legally impossible for the other person to have any say in, or access to. I know that in the United States because marital law says that all assets are mutual property, there are so many people who have been taken advantage of either during marriage or after. And the only way to ensure that that does not happen is taking legal action to prevent it before there's any sort of contractual agreement between the two of you .
HONESTY is the best policy. The truth prevails and you feel better about the circumstances as nothing to hide. Just be truthful its always better than living a lie.
I voted 🇺🇸 We have come along way in the community with body acceptance. Physical appearance can be important but the relationship is more important with many people.
I’ve voted for you guys ❤️. What you are doing is amazing. I’m also just getting involved slowly in Aberdeen with a men’s mental health group. I may be a happy healthy homo now too, but have had my own issues. As far as I can see, sexuality is not the issue, men just need to meet up and talk more together. Your vids have helped me to be confident enough to get involved. Roll on 4th September when our meetings start. I hope your votes go through the roof for the awards and you will smash it!
This is good advice. Think of it as you would, say, writing a novel. Among the most fatal missteps of novice writers is to begin their book with what's called an info dump, some massive preamble telling a complex backstory filled with cascades of characters, events, and ideas. Few things turn off a reader more quickly.
Great question S. E. (I think). And good answers. Personally My thought is that tho there may be some that are put off by a shorter life span or scarring, but given that anyone can have accidents at any point and end up worse off, those folks aren't your people at all. You deserve someone who loves you for you, so seems to be great advice here.
Simply said, a new person comes along, they aren't entitled to know everything on day one. Allow that person to have personal information gradually, never all at once. If there is body issues, get to the second, or even the third date if things are going that slowly, before breaking out the confidential files. Meaning allow things to happen as it moves forward. And no one is ever entitled to know about your finances until you feel safe divulging that information, maybe months later. That is personal information that should be protected.
It is said “gay community”, but it’s not a community at all. People think it’s their position to share others hiv status. It’s sad. The laws alone have changed: “if undetectable with meds one doesn’t have to tell their sexual partners”. That’s so wrong. However, if a person does tell someone they hope to date/be intimate with…they risk being seen as “diseased” and treated as diseased vs. knowing whom they really are. It’s sad. Even more sad, I’ve heard stories of one telling the other first only to hear “oh good me too, I didn’t know when to tell you”. As a professional, I think one should tell their status upfront and be done with it. If they run you didn’t want them anyway. If they stay and they start to treat you as a disease-let them go. Of course try communicating through it. In addition, stop sleeping around for fun/to scratch an itch. Date for love. Rare in the gay “community”.
First, please don't talk about your wealth or lack thereof. It is no one's business. As for health issues, please wait for three dates and then bring it up unless they ask because of the scarring. If you really think this will limit your life span, it is fair to mention it once you get to know each other.
well it dependes. i am literally blunt coz my situation is different. i always was from start coz other side had to know what they ae getting into. having complex ptsd since ae 9 coz of war caused trauma, having a status of survivor of ethnical cleansing, raising 2 kids who are related to me, but not mine, being an amputee etc... i mean when you have mental ondition or phsical or both, was affected by abuse, you have issues thru most of your life, other side needs to know it into what they are getting into and are they rdy for it. same goes for se**l experience, i have a friend who dated a guy who was like scared of sex, they would make out and then suddendl the guy would just stop, made an excuse or what ever and my friend figure dout the guy maybe is just shy and needs time to get relaxed, after 6 months my friend started to be annoyed and i told him, sit with him and talk, there is a problem, you cant know what he went thru in life, was he abused, how experinced he is etc.. well at the guy was ashamed he never done it with anyone and he was in his early 30ties and it was an issue for him, he did not know how to tell it. people have issues all of people have some issues, but holding stuff from other side is not good, especialy if it starts to turn into months and you hold everything hidden. i had a strategy where i would see where it goes and every few weeks would reveal something. i mean being an amputee was obvious you cant miss someone is missing a fist, so i would say str8 away i also miss a leg. majority had no issues with it. when it comes to ptsd in my homeland i never had to say it coz everyone who survived the 90ties have some kind of ptsd and when i would say from wich town i was and that i spent whole siege and 2 days after the fall of city in a city, they knew i have ptsd and that probably i saw bunch of stuff, was abused on all possibel ways, so that never was an issue in my homeland. but otuside of it, well it was coz as a young adult i lived and still do ( between 2 countries) in iceland and dating people who had no clue what war is nd ethnic cleansing, well it was tough, i never knew how to bring that topic, never ever. it was a torture when to tell, how to tell, but it was an expirence and older i got i knew when and how to tell. it is not good to wait for months to reveal cruical infos, but also it is not good to unleash everything on firt date or second, if thins start to develop afer a month it is a time to start telling things. if things are becoming sexual then any issues you have regarding to that departament must be talked thru. i always waited with that one, but usualy peple knew who i dated that there was something, coz i would tell them on like a third date that i went thru some stuff on wich i am working with health professionals and that they always need to or announce me or aks for a permission if they want to touch me, anywhere, does not matter is it a hand or shoulder or any where else. i dated both women and men and had same issue with both. so people kinda knew even before the sex talk there is something serious. but thaz my issues and expeirnced, it is tough whn you are messed up since age 9 and you try to navigate stuff youer whole life.. people make mistake often when they or say everything way too early or wait to long to say impotant stuff, neither is good. my expiernece is that we need to be honest, but choose when an how to tell important things, coz the other side have a right to know and ecide for themselves do they want to be involved or not. i had a bf who hidden from me that he was an acholic and when i saw him drunk, he relapsed i was done, coz i grew up with an alcholic, my dad after was was drunk all the time 24/7. i was mad he hide tha from me, coz i have to know it, i could help him stay sober, could pay attention, he could reach for me in crisis, like my brother always did. instead he hide it from me, i felt like 8 months of relationshp was nothing, like i was decived and lied to.. had same feeling with my trans bf, we were 7 years toghether, 3 lived together and he decided at year 5 to tell me he is trans, was approved hormonal therapy and will fly to bankok in a year for first operation.. i was like wtf, you waited 5 years to tell me that. i was mad really mad, but i am pansexual ( according to people who know me, even thou i never cared in wich box i am and what label i have, had enough of that in m life), and i was like ok it is still same person, tossing 5 years down the drain is stupid coz of that, he was scared to tell etc etc. at the end we broke up when his fist landed to my head 3 times. coz he was not abel to properly control his testoreone rushes. i had enough after that. there are infos wich need to be reavel in first months, other in 6, some others by the 4th date and some in a span of a year.. other side have a right to know if you are starting to be more and more like a couple, other side can catch feelings and some of those informations can turn things upside down.. it al l dependes about info and situation, but i personaly know from my expericnes, a lot of them for 22 years that beast option is to be completly honest, littel by littel.. p.s. sorry for the lenght and typos, i am too lasy to go thru whole comment and correct them...
Great show, and I like you two. However, advice is advice, I think the phrase you were looking for is …”the views expressed are merely our OPINION” we are not professionals………..
So, we have been nominated for Podcast of the Year at the bCreator Awards!! If you could spare a couple of minutes and vote for us here, that would mean a lot to us: www.bcreator.co.uk/awards/ Thank you 🙏🏼
Voted! Thanks for all the love and support you guys put out into the world, much appreciated 🏳🌈🙏
Took a while to find, but I did and voted; good luck.
If you’re are planning a sexual or romantic relationship, it would be very good to mention your health condition before any sex takes place and before the romantic feelings go too far. Pick a quiet time when you will have a chance to tell them about it, discuss the situation and they can ask questions. Tell them what to expect with your health condition and be honest. You need a partner to hear you and be involved in the conversation. It's not worth just having someone if they aren't also caring for who you are entirely. You're completely worth having someone love you for everything you are, including your health issues. When you first discuss your health condition is the time to find out if this partner will be there for you.
Voted. It's marvelous what you two are providing for an under-served community. The thing is, the thoughts and advice you share easily pertain to all of us, LGBTQ+ or straight. You make social media a more inclusive place to be. Whether you win the award or not, thank you for your exceptional contributions.
This!!!
One South African vote submitted! Awesome platform and always relevant which keeps it interesting. Holding thumbs for the rewards and GOOD LUCK!!!😊🇿🇦
Just voted congratulations on the nomination. Best of Luck!! Enjoy all your videos.
Voted. Hope it helps.
I am a 65 y o gay male.
There was a video about scrambled eggs you posted. The secret to scrambled eggs is LOW, SLOW and KEEP IT MOVING. I took that and use it in everyday life now, especially. When working out! Thank you for your words of wisdom. All blessings to you both!
I think you two said it all. Yes, you need to provide the information before things get serious. But, not before you've established a connection. Definitely avoid finances until you hear wedding bells. Or the very least are moving in together with someone. There are bad people who do terrible things for money. So be extremely cautious when bringing up that subject.
Yes!!! And I would go a step further and make sure that that money is somehow legally impossible for the other person to have any say in, or access to. I know that in the United States because marital law says that all assets are mutual property, there are so many people who have been taken advantage of either during marriage or after. And the only way to ensure that that does not happen is taking legal action to prevent it before there's any sort of contractual agreement between the two of you .
Voted 💙
Another vote coming your way 😊
Congratulations, I really hope you win.
HONESTY is the best policy. The truth prevails and you feel better about the circumstances as nothing to hide. Just be truthful its always better than living a lie.
It depends on how serious and intimate things are between yourself and another person. If things get serious, then honesty is best.
The truthful is always better than living a lie.
Great advice guys. I was definitely someone who would unload way too much info on date 1, and looking back, I think it was a way of self sabotage!
You are shining Guys
I just started watching~~ I love these guys~~ straight to the point ~~ no Bull shit~~~ keeping it real!
You both are a positive part of the gay community and insightful 🎉.
I will say, I prefer the shorter Vlogs. My attention span is 15 minutes max, then I look for something else.
Great job boys. Stay true, stay safe -x-
I voted 🇺🇸
We have come along way in the community with body acceptance. Physical appearance can be important but the relationship is more important with many people.
I’ve voted for you guys ❤️. What you are doing is amazing. I’m also just getting involved slowly in Aberdeen with a men’s mental health group. I may be a happy healthy homo now too, but have had my own issues. As far as I can see, sexuality is not the issue, men just need to meet up and talk more together. Your vids have helped me to be confident enough to get involved. Roll on 4th September when our meetings start. I hope your votes go through the roof for the awards and you will smash it!
This is good advice. Think of it as you would, say, writing a novel. Among the most fatal missteps of novice writers is to begin their book with what's called an info dump, some massive preamble telling a complex backstory filled with cascades of characters, events, and ideas. Few things turn off a reader more quickly.
Joel, looking fab in your purple Tony Hawk T. Always enjoy seeing you in something other than black.
I am dealing with this having incurable cancer, My body has changed and lately I have no interest in sex. Thanks for your advice. P.S. I voted for you
Great question S. E. (I think). And good answers. Personally My thought is that tho there may be some that are put off by a shorter life span or scarring, but given that anyone can have accidents at any point and end up worse off, those folks aren't your people at all. You deserve someone who loves you for you, so seems to be great advice here.
Just went over and voted for Happy Healthy Homo, of course I hope you win!🏆✨💫💕👍
Feels like your season never ended. But carry on with it.
Joel, you look so good in that violet colour😍
Good advice … and did Keegan only meet with his therapist on Tuesdays? Cause it is “Tuesdays with Morrie”. 😂
Simply said, a new person comes along, they aren't entitled to know everything on day one. Allow that person to have personal information gradually, never all at once. If there is body issues, get to the second, or even the third date if things are going that slowly, before breaking out the confidential files. Meaning allow things to happen as it moves forward. And no one is ever entitled to know about your finances until you feel safe divulging that information, maybe months later. That is personal information that should be protected.
Yaaaaaay
It is said “gay community”, but it’s not a community at all. People think it’s their position to share others hiv status. It’s sad. The laws alone have changed: “if undetectable with meds one doesn’t have to tell their sexual partners”. That’s so wrong. However, if a person does tell someone they hope to date/be intimate with…they risk being seen as “diseased” and treated as diseased vs. knowing whom they really are. It’s sad. Even more sad, I’ve heard stories of one telling the other first only to hear “oh good me too, I didn’t know when to tell you”. As a professional, I think one should tell their status upfront and be done with it. If they run you didn’t want them anyway. If they stay and they start to treat you as a disease-let them go. Of course try communicating through it. In addition, stop sleeping around for fun/to scratch an itch. Date for love. Rare in the gay “community”.
First, please don't talk about your wealth or lack thereof. It is no one's business. As for health issues, please wait for three dates and then bring it up unless they ask because of the scarring. If you really think this will limit your life span, it is fair to mention it once you get to know each other.
Voted 🤍🤍
well it dependes. i am literally blunt coz my situation is different. i always was from start coz other side had to know what they ae getting into. having complex ptsd since ae 9 coz of war caused trauma, having a status of survivor of ethnical cleansing, raising 2 kids who are related to me, but not mine, being an amputee etc... i mean when you have mental ondition or phsical or both, was affected by abuse, you have issues thru most of your life, other side needs to know it into what they are getting into and are they rdy for it. same goes for se**l experience, i have a friend who dated a guy who was like scared of sex, they would make out and then suddendl the guy would just stop, made an excuse or what ever and my friend figure dout the guy maybe is just shy and needs time to get relaxed, after 6 months my friend started to be annoyed and i told him, sit with him and talk, there is a problem, you cant know what he went thru in life, was he abused, how experinced he is etc.. well at the guy was ashamed he never done it with anyone and he was in his early 30ties and it was an issue for him, he did not know how to tell it. people have issues all of people have some issues, but holding stuff from other side is not good, especialy if it starts to turn into months and you hold everything hidden. i had a strategy where i would see where it goes and every few weeks would reveal something. i mean being an amputee was obvious you cant miss someone is missing a fist, so i would say str8 away i also miss a leg. majority had no issues with it. when it comes to ptsd in my homeland i never had to say it coz everyone who survived the 90ties have some kind of ptsd and when i would say from wich town i was and that i spent whole siege and 2 days after the fall of city in a city, they knew i have ptsd and that probably i saw bunch of stuff, was abused on all possibel ways, so that never was an issue in my homeland. but otuside of it, well it was coz as a young adult i lived and still do ( between 2 countries) in iceland and dating people who had no clue what war is nd ethnic cleansing, well it was tough, i never knew how to bring that topic, never ever. it was a torture when to tell, how to tell, but it was an expirence and older i got i knew when and how to tell. it is not good to wait for months to reveal cruical infos, but also it is not good to unleash everything on firt date or second, if thins start to develop afer a month it is a time to start telling things. if things are becoming sexual then any issues you have regarding to that departament must be talked thru. i always waited with that one, but usualy peple knew who i dated that there was something, coz i would tell them on like a third date that i went thru some stuff on wich i am working with health professionals and that they always need to or announce me or aks for a permission if they want to touch me, anywhere, does not matter is it a hand or shoulder or any where else. i dated both women and men and had same issue with both. so people kinda knew even before the sex talk there is something serious. but thaz my issues and expeirnced, it is tough whn you are messed up since age 9 and you try to navigate stuff youer whole life..
people make mistake often when they or say everything way too early or wait to long to say impotant stuff, neither is good. my expiernece is that we need to be honest, but choose when an how to tell important things, coz the other side have a right to know and ecide for themselves do they want to be involved or not. i had a bf who hidden from me that he was an acholic and when i saw him drunk, he relapsed i was done, coz i grew up with an alcholic, my dad after was was drunk all the time 24/7. i was mad he hide tha from me, coz i have to know it, i could help him stay sober, could pay attention, he could reach for me in crisis, like my brother always did. instead he hide it from me, i felt like 8 months of relationshp was nothing, like i was decived and lied to.. had same feeling with my trans bf, we were 7 years toghether, 3 lived together and he decided at year 5 to tell me he is trans, was approved hormonal therapy and will fly to bankok in a year for first operation.. i was like wtf, you waited 5 years to tell me that. i was mad really mad, but i am pansexual ( according to people who know me, even thou i never cared in wich box i am and what label i have, had enough of that in m life), and i was like ok it is still same person, tossing 5 years down the drain is stupid coz of that, he was scared to tell etc etc. at the end we broke up when his fist landed to my head 3 times. coz he was not abel to properly control his testoreone rushes. i had enough after that. there are infos wich need to be reavel in first months, other in 6, some others by the 4th date and some in a span of a year.. other side have a right to know if you are starting to be more and more like a couple, other side can catch feelings and some of those informations can turn things upside down.. it al l dependes about info and situation, but i personaly know from my expericnes, a lot of them for 22 years that beast option is to be completly honest, littel by littel.. p.s. sorry for the lenght and typos, i am too lasy to go thru whole comment and correct them...
Great show, and I like you two. However, advice is advice, I think the phrase you were looking for is …”the views expressed are merely our OPINION” we are not professionals………..