Don’t ever get with someone that is broken and hasn’t done the work to repair themselves. Because no matter how much you love someone you can’t fix them, it’s not your job. Pick somebody that you don’t want to change….
Exactly. Or to hope that they'll eventually believe the way you do. Faith is one primary factor in relationships and if two people are not walking in the same direction, those two will end up pulling each other back and forth until at least one breaks. Ask those questions on the first date, and walk away right away if you can't walk their beliefs.
It’s incredible how there’s so many women going through toxic relationships and thinking their dude’s actions are normal because they’ve never experienced a true good man
This 100%... I can't believe this toxic guy was weaponizing her affair. It's his fault she had the affair to begin with. It never ceases to amaze me how toxic men are.
OMGEEEE! This is the episode you told her to write "Cheater" down and mail it to you and then on another episode you got it and had no idea why! LOL!! She actually did it! Go Aleisha!!!
I remember that episode too and it seemed so creepy. I hope Dr John realizes this too. It would be super unsettling to receive that thinking it is an accusation of some sort.
Every marriage will be tested to the point of failure; the ones that survive are only the ones where BOTH spouses are committed to never giving up, no matter what.
BUT….. one can’t just stay and go through the motions to have an actual good marriage. There are tons of bad marriages out there where people “never gave up”. Just because you stay doesn’t mean you haven’t given up. Sometimes that’s exactly what it means.
I knew my marriage was over when I realized I was going through the motions. The toxic environment and abuse didn't help either. We had 2 kids together. I finally pulled the courage and filed for divorce. That lead to 3 months of escalated DV but I always made sure the kids were somewhere safe during this time. August 2018 got divorced and we are much happier for it. For some reason it blindsided my ex but I was working 3 jobs, going to school, raising two kids and doing all the errands, cooking and housework. He did nothing. I remember he once started crying clining to my legs begging not to leave and in hindsight this was him panicking because he was losing a meal ticket, I said I said I was still going for the divorce and he stopped crying and called me every name you can think of, I didn't react I just walked past him and out the door to walk alone.
Congratulations! You deserve a real quality man to walk beside you or at least rid yourself of a ball and chain pulling you down. “A “man” who doesn’t provide for his family is worse than an infidel.” You are raising your children to command RESPECT and kick losers to the curb and live their best life in good company. Be so blessed in your future!
This comment is for @boston 312: making vows before God to stay married till death. If the husband refused to work on the marriage also, it is abandonment. I was married for 37.5 years to a verbal abuser who saw no need to change whatsover . I thought very long and hard on this decision to leave . He has never made amends to ME. I have forgiven him but there is no continuance of our relationship because he doesnt think he has done anything wrong. My 3 children have thanked me for leaving. He was abusive the them also. They respect me more for finally leaving and stop being his doormat. I come from a family that divorce is not an option, so I didnt do it for a very long time.
So proud of you. I know my husband is happy with our marriage. Yes, he does cook. Other than that, he doesn’t work, drinks whisky and plays games. I am getting older with nothing saved because of life choices, including putting him through 2, degrees. I work 50 plus hours per week and so tired with nothing saved
7:54pm sitting in my car because I dont want the kids to feel tension because thats and fighting is all thats left and if I stay gone the trauma is less
It may sound stupid but I never fully understood exactly what it is about "take it one day at a time" that makes a challenge easier to overcome, until it was laid out like that: "I can do anything for a day" and better yet when he said, "I can do anything for an hour, for a minute." Simple yet empowering!
Niki, LEAVE. It doesn’t get better. I’m still in it and my mental health is horrible now. My self esteem doesn’t even exist. If I could go to sleep and never wake up I’d be fine with that. Don’t ever let a man make you feel like your trash. EVER.
Hi. I’m so sorry for the way you’re feeling. Please please know that no matter how hard, scary, messy, complicated, you CAN find freedom and start over. There’s hope and peace and safety out there ❤️
Great video! Unfortunately, my two-year relationship ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, and I still love him deeply. I can't stop thinking about him. I've done everything I can to get him back, but nothing has worked. I'm frustrated and can't imagine my life with anyone else. Despite my best efforts, I can't get him out of my mind. I really miss him.
It's incredibly hard to let go of someone you love. I was in a similar situation when my twelve-year relationship ended. I couldn't let him go, so I did everything I could to get him back. I sought the help of a spiritual counselor, who assisted me in reuniting with him.
My only love I’ve ever had, my ex-fiance, left me via text about 5 months ago. Every day I think about her but it’ll pass, and we’ll find someone who values us later on once we’ve healed!! But know that your ex is your ex because they made a choice, don’t try to get them back because they’ve already decided to live without you. Stay strong!!
I understand what the young man is going through. I'm 70 and I learned to walk again. For me the worst part was when the braces were strapped to my legs and I was made to stand up in paralled bars. I fell quite a few times. Over 40 years later, I'm doing crossfit and yoga. Don't give up. Please, don't give up.
Never understood individuals that stay tied to an ex partner. Heal and separate, have integrity, and respect for yourself and others. No breaks, space or trial separations, take a risk and develop some courage to move on.
Wow, this is so uplifting it’s truly important to stay inspired. I feel such a deep sense of emptiness. It’s been two months since Jack left, and every day feels like an eternity without him. My mind is overwhelmed with memories of our time together. The thought that I’ll never experience the little things with him again is so painful. I’ve texted him so many times, pouring out how much I miss and want him back, but he hasn’t replied. All I can do now is hold onto the memories.
It’s okay to grieve, my dear. It’s clear that you’re not just missing Jack but also the part of yourself that you shared with him. Reaching out to him like that shows how much love you still carry it takes real courage to be so vulnerable. Heartbreak is painful, but don’t lose hope. I understand how you feel. My own heartbreak was devastating sudden and brutal. It left me feeling lost and shattered. In my desperation for solace and guidance, I turned to a spiritual counselor recommended by a friend.
To the young man, I became disabled in my 20s. Doctors stuck needles in my feet , tried all sorts of therapies, and I am still (in my 50s) an ambulatory wheelchair user. I walk, I use scooters, knee scooter, wheelchair as needed. My feet get better and worse, but I am limited. I have had to find work and income streams that work with my body. Also, I DO NOT DISCUSS MY HEALTH WITH MOST PEOPLE! I ONLY discuss it with people who LISTEN TO ME! Other people do NOT know what I need! Grieve and be angry as long as you need to! Find a therapist! Create your own life
Andrew, my man, your innate value as a human being does not end where your legs end You have so much more to offer to the world than just your legs You have value simply because you exist
Wow. Incredible part when he speaks with battling PTSD, Anxiety, & Depression after becoming disabled in an accident. I pray for him. Stay strong brother. Love you from Wisconsin.
Andrew I am an old nurse. I had thousands of different patients. I had a patient that was run over by an 18 wheeler. He had so many problems with nerves and bones and unable to walk. After 2 years he returned working his business of home improvement and construction. In fact when I visited him for wound care he was trying to assist me with a kitchen remodel! Keep your mind focused on the prize. Compartmentalize your pain. Believe me I understand. John gives such excellent advice. By the way the guy I sited was only 3 years older than you.
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
@29:41 Writing down is such a great advice. My sister told me to write down my trauma backward/opposite. I used to have trust issues. I wrote down, "I'm healthy, I trust in men, and I trust my boyfriend." Now it helped me a lot.
Nikki, I lived your life. I stayed for 15 years. It doesn't get better. LEAVE!! For yourself and your boys! By staying you are showing your boys that this is a way a man treats a woman. Trust me my kids are now 26,24, 22 and I see how staying hurt them. We all want WHOLE relationships, this is not one. Please trust me on this. Leave and don't look back. Wishing you all the best.
Agreed. I regret staying. I showed my kids poor role models for marriage. And his actions, his lack of support, and criticism wasn't good for me or the kids. I regret marrying him, and I regret staying.
@blueseptember2174 the kids have very little self esteem. They talk about walking on eggshells around their dad, even as adults. I know my son treats his fiance like buddy, not like he should. My daughter is depressed and has a hard time getting out of bed, even as an adult. Me too. I eventually went and got another job and got my own place. But still return from time to time for business. Every time I'm back, I can't get my work done because it's all about him. He prioritizes himself with access to the bathroom etc. he gets upset when things don't go as planned. He is yelling even when I'm on a business call. It's just a reminder that I was very young and stupid, even at 30, when I got married.
Omg the last caller I'm crying . I'm in a similar situation. My husband says I looked better before I got pregnant . He constantly tries to tell me what to do. No respect. His advice hit me hard. Thank you John
Just curious did he show any signs of this kind of behaviour towards you or this type of misogyny towards other women before you got pregnant, or did the pregnancy flip a switch in him?
@@woboznzNo he didn't show this before I got pregnant. He doesn't have a great relationship with his mother because she put him and his siblings through hell. When I had the mood swings while pregnant he would say I was mean to him and honestly I wasn't . He didn't care to understand what women go through when I tried to explain it
I love how Deloney dealt with Andrew’s case. I feel so sad for Andrew’. I heard the pain in his voice. I’m sending positivity his way . I hope he catches a break. Sigh. I hope he’s with the Ramsey programme and doesn’t have financial issues to make things worse.
Dear One with the two little ones ... 2 children & 6 years is long enough. It doesn’t appear he wants to be in it for the long haul. PLEASE recognize your worth! And your kids too. Wishing he’d mature and respect you will not make it happen. I know this from experience... I’m completely embarrassed to say I stayed with a man that promised he wanted to marry me for 9 years! Don’t make the mistake I made. His lack of ability to see your value is NOT your fault. You CAN have respectful love in your life. It will be hard ... but you CAN do it! My love and prayers are with you. 🙏🏼💕
I can never understand why you women expect men to see this so called value in you. You are not seeing you from his perspective. Perhaps he does not see the same "value" you see in yourself. Instead of assuming that you're valuable to him, try asking him pertinent questions about how he sees you and perhaps you will find out that you are not as valuable as you think, or he's not seeing what you think you are projecting. Coming from a good place. Stop assuming. Ask questions.
@@marvinanthony1172 facts! You cheapen your “value” when you stay with a man based on assumptions. Always figure out what their intentions are and don’t assume that you are beneficial to everyone. You are not entitled to appreciation from someone that doesn’t appreciate you
I felt for Andrew because I have watched a family member who was vital, active and a force to be reckoned with, deal with a spinal cord injury that has left her a quadriplegic. She has fought pain, depression, doctors and caregivers who did little. Some even told her she would not live 5 years - she would likely die of infection. Fast forward, her husband takes great care of her. She has a few good doctors. They travel. She has an ATV that is rigged with a harness and adaptive tech to let her few arm muscles that work let her drive off road. She has done a tandem sky dive. (Her former spinal cord advisor did too, and asked, "What's gonna happen? I already broke my neck!") Her good advisor told her to get well over the next two years. Then, have something to do and to work for. Andrew, there is life ahead! It can still be an adventure.
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
If Nikki ever reads these comments, I hope she realizes that she deserves more than that poor excuse of a boyfriend! Someone who’s worth your time will not talk to you like this!!! You CAN make it away from him. You can’t burn brightly if someone is always putting out your flame. ❤️
It was so hard to hear her tearing up on the call! Poor girl, and the laughter is almost nauseating too like she doesn’t understand the gravity of how he treats her
Super emotional listening to Andrew's story. John, you are so amazing, getting into the problem, emotion and mapping out the rout to the solution. I'm so inspired listening to you. How incredible, you have the ability to change people's perspectives so that in turn they can change their path. What a gift you have x
Nikki, my love, after a 20-year relationship and him emotionally abusing me just like your BF is doing to you. Is not ok leave baby leave for you for those babies it's the best thing don't waste another second on him. Because he will find someone else and leave you when he can't take anything else from you. You are a beautiful mother and you deserve the world! You can get through this and more. ❤❤❤
I was married for 14 years we divorced 5 years ago and I jumped back into a relationship, as this relationship went on I realized that I was the reason for the divorce and I’ll never change and now 4.5 years later this relationship is over and I’ll never change, I’m not a cheater or anything like that I just have problem with communication so I think it’s time for me to be alone I’m 52 and I learned life does go on and spend time with me
It’s doesn’t take 6 years to figure out if you want to marry someone. On a side note, I tell my girls ALL THE TIME to be careful who they have babies with. If you marry someone, you can always get a divorce. If you have a baby with someone, you are stuck dealing with them (in most cases) for at least 18 years.
My heart goes out to Nikki. Now being a mom myself. Oh my goodness is it hard being home with not only 1 but two little ones...Sister..GO LIVE YOUR LIFE. There is so much more for you.
I’m not yet on Nikki’s story but am seeing this comment. Whats more than being a mother and loving your children? As in, why are you implying they are ruining her and her ability in life?
The gentleman that called in about his feet ran over and disability my ears hear him .Thank you for being so brave I feel like you do .I have herredity angiodemia and is life threatening daily .keep going my friend you got me to reach out .thank you .
Nikki, what are you doing??? I felt so sorry for her! Move on. The second you move on, you will gain motivation for yourself and your kids. Some of these 'men' are so selfish its mind boggling. Jocko will 100% disapprove.
I feel for Niki. No one deserves this from any one, especially a guy whose sole purpose is to make you and your kids feel happy and safe. it’s true that kids will absorb their environment, I grew up with parents that never separated but they should’ve. I would prefer to have seen both my parents happy apart. It ruined all my siblings views on marriage and our relationships, and consequently our relationships with our own kids.
I really feel for the young man who talked about the accident and also the loss of his brother. And also... have a feeling things are going to go well for him. What obstacles to overcome they are.. somehow I believe he can. 💖
Omg alieshas story is my own currently! Seperated still living together. There are so many feeling still floating around. We have the best days sometimes and the spark comes back. It's so tiring. I want to be worthy of someone's love.
OMG you are amazing Dr. Jhon delony. Even after years , Your show still inspiers and guieds. your intention, your methods and the empaty and genuine care you have for your callers is wonderful. Keep up the great work you and your team are doing. Keep going dont stop.
I would so much rather be with a person with any type of disability who is so open, honest and a good person than half the men out there who are not loving and kind. Your wife loves you! Most women like to be "carers" in some way and what they give you, you can give back to them with love and affirmation which is a rare thing for us and makes women feel happy and fulfilled. Please be positive. You have great future ahead of you. Wishing you all the very best from the UK. XxX
Love how Dr John challenges and encourages Andrew! God still has a plan for you and can still use you sweet Andrew your testimony can change lives and touch so many❤ God Bless you - all the best!
You can do it Andrew!!! Keep living and loving! Find your God given purpose and go for it. Often, finding someone else for you to help makes a tremendous difference in ourselves.
My heart and prayers gobout to Andrew i know exactly how he feels. I became disabled from a work accident and it changed .y life forever. Lost my confidence, my husband and my control on my mental health 😢
My to do list includes feed baby, make lunches, eat lunch, make dinner, change nappies (diapers). Then I have the optional things after that if I can: read books to kids, clean, do dishes, tidy toys, laundry on, laundry dry, laundry folded, laundry away. It helps a lot to cross things off, and write what else you do as it comes up- that way you know, and others can see exactly what a day looks like.
Hey James! Happy almost decade of sobriety man. I don’t know if johns gonna call you again this year, but we’re all still out here rooting for you man ◡̈
Thank you so much for this one. I had a back injury and got nerve damage. My foot is permanently immobile. That's the short of it. I went through depression and developed panic disorder. It was horrible. I'm doing better now. I've learn to get around and join in life. But this brought me to tears because I totally identify. Thanks for being vulnerable to get on this show and talk about it. You are not alone. I was 27 years old when it happened.
I agree, I love your show. For someone with so many credentials, you are so down to earth and easy to relate to. Good luck and I wish you continued success.
Wow John, you really outdid yourself this time. Nice wrap up to this video. Holding mothers up high the way you did. Thank you for your support. You are one of a kind.💝♥️
I just want to say how happy I’m to have found this channel. I love the way Dr. John gives advice in all the shows. Great Job!!!! We all need this free therapy❤
Thank you Dr. Delony for your brilliant approach to tough issues and help people answer their mountain. I love your direct approach, direct solutions and how you call people to their own action. Absolutely brilliant, beautiful, inspiring! Thank You! ❤🙏🏻
So much pain in the world that is self inflicted! No one can make us happy or miserable--we do that to ourselves! I'm sorry for the ones that feel they can't leave the misery! The unknown is better than the painful now!!
I don't know if this would be of any help and I can't deal with it from like the PTSD part but my TH-cam channel is where I show how I do things from a wheelchair. It may help the gentleman with the hurt feet to do some things sitting. I live independently I can work and completely take care of myself from a physical standpoint (pun intended) all from sitting. He will obviously need help to deal with the pain physically and mentally but from a task perspective there are ways. And I'm more than happy to talk to him or his wife and be of encouragement
I hope Andrew let's John's strong words really penetrate his heart. I knew before he said it their was a religious element. I am a very strong Believer and follower of Christ, AND we have done ourselves a disservice by thinking that God will heal every broken bone or relieve all suffering. That is not the message of the Bible. We are not guaranteed health, but we are guaranteed the Lord's goodness and closeness when we go through difficulties. In the last year, we have experienced so much that people have had the nerve to say that we were in sin...if they knew the Lord, they would have seen clearly that our hearts were filled with joy, we had opportunity to pray with people who hurt us because their lives were broken, and God provided without fail the whole time. I am now walking, in nursing school, my husband is working, and our children have witnessed the truth of God's word be evident in our lives. We aren't promised easy, we are promised His word and His presence. I pray that Andrew would remember that God's grace and mercy have followed him and his wife ALL the days of their lives...even in the accident. He endured the cross. He won't run from your pain, sweetheart. Lord, restore joy and peace to their home, please. In Your powerful name!
I went thru a terrible trauma but when I finally realized the pain wasn't good but the lessons I learned could be a blessing to others and that gave the trauma and healing a purpose. It was when I started to heal. It took a long time but it worked.
I picture Nikki's boyfriend coming home from work, walking in the door, holding a clip board and grilling her about what she's done all day, as he marks off pass/fail boxes he's making qrunting noises while looking over his glasses that he's wearing at the end of his nose, and disappointingly shaking his head back and forth like a supervisor at work... 🤦♂️
Your soul will tell you when relationship is over. Think of the person, and your soul will tell you. Oh yes, it’s real......deep, but real. Your soul guides you when you are quiet, and listen
Agree! I love that you made this comment. It speaks to me. I often get clarity and perspective about my situation in the small time after I wake up in the morning. If I don’t write it down, things get clouded again as the day progresses and I don’t understand my situation again. I have wondered what that phenomenon is. You explained that very succinctly. Makes sense. Thank you commenter
I’ve watched a lot of episodes but this one.. watching you speak life and patience and love into this guy… just makes me wanna hug you John and say I love you in a really non creepy weirdo way. Just as a human being
If I was the one run this talk show, there would be 10 boxes of tissues on the desk.... Amazing Dr. John and very very good wishes for you Andrew, so sorry, you will feel better day by day.
I knew my relationship was over when i was sitting on a therapy chair on my 4th session on 30th dec 2024, alone and crying and debating on y i should be in the relationship when the other person is not even willing to have a conversation with me, let alone morally being there where he is okay letting me suffer and die, thats the moment i knew, its over. I tried explain him next morning and then broke it off
I feel so much for the newly disabled man ❤ I love you sir, keep fighting your fight my love. I wish I could take all your pain from you ❤ horrible situation all around, God bless your brother too
The man in the wheel chair is so anointed and called by God. And those suicidal dreams are an attach from the enemy. He needs to pray like Job, and then heal and start working in his calling. That’s how you KNOW you’re called by God is when the enemy tries to take you out.
Don't fall in love with potential. People don't just change
Amen. Loving the “idea” of him, not him
Don’t ever get with someone that is broken and hasn’t done the work to repair themselves. Because no matter how much you love someone you can’t fix them, it’s not your job. Pick somebody that you don’t want to change….
Wow... I needed to hear that.
Exactly. Or to hope that they'll eventually believe the way you do. Faith is one primary factor in relationships and if two people are not walking in the same direction, those two will end up pulling each other back and forth until at least one breaks. Ask those questions on the first date, and walk away right away if you can't walk their beliefs.
Fact!
It’s incredible how there’s so many women going through toxic relationships and thinking their dude’s actions are normal because they’ve never experienced a true good man
There are just as many toxic women ruining men's lives. Don't kid yourself.
There are no good men. Men are taught to control women and are treated like superiors from the day they’re born.
This 100%... I can't believe this toxic guy was weaponizing her affair. It's his fault she had the affair to begin with. It never ceases to amaze me how toxic men are.
Same for men with toxic women who never experienced a good woman.
It happens gradually and continuously seems more & more normal
OMGEEEE! This is the episode you told her to write "Cheater" down and mail it to you and then on another episode you got it and had no idea why! LOL!! She actually did it! Go Aleisha!!!
I saw that episode last week so that part was funny to me, too!
Which one is that?!
😂 I’m dying right now. That’s funny 😆
I remember that episode too and it seemed so creepy.
I hope Dr John realizes this too. It would be super unsettling to receive that thinking it is an accusation of some sort.
😂😂😂 bahaha. 😹. Now I remember it too. In one episode 😂😂😂.
Every marriage will be tested to the point of failure; the ones that survive are only the ones where BOTH spouses are committed to never giving up, no matter what.
Amen
@nodramamomma2777 people to day think they don't need their partner to survive so they are quick to throw them away
@@shirk_slayeryes. Selfishness and me first attitude has unlived so many partnerships.
BUT….. one can’t just stay and go through the motions to have an actual good marriage. There are tons of bad marriages out there where people “never gave up”. Just because you stay doesn’t mean you haven’t given up. Sometimes that’s exactly what it means.
@michellemorrow7 some pretty have a pretty high bar for what they consider a good marriage, unfortunately. If it's not a 90's RomCom they bail.
I knew my marriage was over when I realized I was going through the motions. The toxic environment and abuse didn't help either. We had 2 kids together. I finally pulled the courage and filed for divorce. That lead to 3 months of escalated DV but I always made sure the kids were somewhere safe during this time. August 2018 got divorced and we are much happier for it. For some reason it blindsided my ex but I was working 3 jobs, going to school, raising two kids and doing all the errands, cooking and housework. He did nothing. I remember he once started crying clining to my legs begging not to leave and in hindsight this was him panicking because he was losing a meal ticket, I said I said I was still going for the divorce and he stopped crying and called me every name you can think of, I didn't react I just walked past him and out the door to walk alone.
the 2 of you made vows in front of God to stay married till death. You need to make amends with both your husband and God
Congratulations! You deserve a real quality man to walk beside you or at least rid yourself of a ball and chain pulling you down. “A “man” who doesn’t provide for his family is worse than an infidel.” You are raising your children to command RESPECT and kick losers to the curb and live their best life in good company. Be so blessed in your future!
This comment is for @boston 312: making vows before God to stay married till death. If the husband refused to work on the marriage also, it is abandonment. I was married for 37.5 years to a verbal abuser who saw no need to change whatsover . I thought very long and hard on this decision to leave . He has never made amends to ME. I have forgiven him but there is no continuance of our relationship because he doesnt think he has done anything wrong. My 3 children have thanked me for leaving. He was abusive the them also. They respect me more for finally leaving and stop being his doormat. I come from a family that divorce is not an option, so I didnt do it for a very long time.
@@boston312 🤮
So proud of you. I know my husband is happy with our marriage. Yes, he does cook. Other than that, he doesn’t work, drinks whisky and plays games. I am getting older with nothing saved because of life choices, including putting him through 2, degrees. I work 50 plus hours per week and so tired with nothing saved
I hope watching this he is 11 year sober😊❤ so kind
When they hurt you & no longer show concern for you .
It’s 12:39 am. Going through this right now 💔
4:22am 💔
1:41 am 🤨
7:54pm sitting in my car because I dont want the kids to feel tension because thats and fighting is all thats left and if I stay gone the trauma is less
"I can do anything for a day..." amazing words, John! CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR SOBRIETY!
I love this....I'm going to steal it!! I can do anything for a day....lunges and squats here I come 💪
It may sound stupid but I never fully understood exactly what it is about "take it one day at a time" that makes a challenge easier to overcome, until it was laid out like that: "I can do anything for a day" and better yet when he said, "I can do anything for an hour, for a minute." Simple yet empowering!
Niki, LEAVE. It doesn’t get better. I’m still in it and my mental health is horrible now. My self esteem doesn’t even exist. If I could go to sleep and never wake up I’d be fine with that. Don’t ever let a man make you feel like your trash. EVER.
Hi. I’m so sorry for the way you’re feeling. Please please know that no matter how hard, scary, messy, complicated, you CAN find freedom and start over. There’s hope and peace and safety out there ❤️
I understand what you are going through too, i hope you are doing well, sending peace and prayers.
Did you go to sleep? 😢
@@erikkasepiphany85she is no longer with us erikka
Krystal why don’t you just leave
Great video! Unfortunately, my two-year relationship ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, and I still love him deeply. I can't stop thinking about him. I've done everything I can to get him back, but nothing has worked. I'm frustrated and can't imagine my life with anyone else. Despite my best efforts, I can't get him out of my mind. I really miss him.
It's incredibly hard to let go of someone you love. I was in a similar situation when my twelve-year relationship ended. I couldn't let him go, so I did everything I could to get him back. I sought the help of a spiritual counselor, who assisted me in reuniting with him.
That's amazing! How did you find a spiritual counselor, and how can I reach him?
His name is Fatherabulu, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can help bring your ex back
Thank you for this valuable information! I just looked him up online, and he seems impressive.
My only love I’ve ever had, my ex-fiance, left me via text about 5 months ago. Every day I think about her but it’ll pass, and we’ll find someone who values us later on once we’ve healed!! But know that your ex is your ex because they made a choice, don’t try to get them back because they’ve already decided to live without you. Stay strong!!
I understand what the young man is going through. I'm 70 and I learned to walk again. For me the worst part was when the braces were strapped to my legs and I was made to stand up in paralled bars. I fell quite a few times. Over 40 years later, I'm doing crossfit and yoga. Don't give up. Please, don't give up.
You are an inspiration!
Keep on keeping on!
Yes this! I have a similar story ❤ Andrew can do it
I hope he reads this 🙏
What a beautiful simile. I ❤it
If the mother of those 2 small children lives in the Phx area, I will gladly clean house, do laundry, etc., to help. Praying for her!!!
Me too! I'm in Peoria.
You are a very kind person ❤
I'm I'm Peoria AZ too... what can we help with? I'm part of s huge church willing to help others in need and my family
What a Good Samaritan you are !
Praying for her!!!
Congratulations James on staying sober for 9 years! Loved that you rang John. So cool.
Never understood individuals that stay tied to an ex partner. Heal and separate, have integrity, and respect for yourself and others. No breaks, space or trial separations, take a risk and develop some courage to move on.
Co dependency 911
🍪
Wow, this is so uplifting it’s truly important to stay inspired.
I feel such a deep sense of emptiness. It’s been two months since Jack left, and every day feels like an eternity without him. My mind is overwhelmed with memories of our time together. The thought that I’ll never experience the little things with him again is so painful. I’ve texted him so many times, pouring out how much I miss and want him back, but he hasn’t replied. All I can do now is hold onto the memories.
It’s okay to grieve, my dear. It’s clear that you’re not just missing Jack but also the part of yourself that you shared with him. Reaching out to him like that shows how much love you still carry it takes real courage to be so vulnerable. Heartbreak is painful, but don’t lose hope.
I understand how you feel. My own heartbreak was devastating sudden and brutal. It left me feeling lost and shattered. In my desperation for solace and guidance, I turned to a spiritual counselor recommended by a friend.
That sounds interesting! What exactly does the spiritual counselor do?
His name is Father Tosin Ayodele, and he’s an amazing spiritual counselor who specializes in helping people reconnect with their exes.
Thank you so much for the suggestion you have no idea how much this means to me.
When you hear other people’s problems, makes you realize your own problems aren’t that bad. Grateful for this channel. 🙏
To the young man, I became disabled in my 20s. Doctors stuck needles in my feet , tried all sorts of therapies, and I am still (in my 50s) an ambulatory wheelchair user. I walk, I use scooters, knee scooter, wheelchair as needed. My feet get better and worse, but I am limited. I have had to find work and income streams that work with my body. Also, I DO NOT DISCUSS MY HEALTH WITH MOST PEOPLE! I ONLY discuss it with people who LISTEN TO ME! Other people do NOT know what I need! Grieve and be angry as long as you need to! Find a therapist! Create your own life
Such wonderful advice here. Thank you ❤
Great advice, and yes I’m definitely rooting and praying for him 🙏🏼 ✨
Andrew, my man, your innate value as a human being does not end where your legs end You have so much more to offer to the world than just your legs You have value simply because you exist
My heart goes out to the 2nd caller who had his feet damaged and is disabled. Prayers for your healing friend 🧡 ❤
Nikki laughing probably cause she didn’t feel like she could cry is so sad. I wish her and the other callers the best of luck 💙
Wow. Incredible part when he speaks with battling PTSD, Anxiety, & Depression after becoming disabled in an accident. I pray for him. Stay strong brother. Love you from Wisconsin.
Andrew I am an old nurse. I had thousands of different patients. I had a patient that was run over by an 18 wheeler. He had so many problems with nerves and bones and unable to walk. After 2 years he returned working his business of home improvement and construction. In fact when I visited him for wound care he was trying to assist me with a kitchen remodel! Keep your mind focused on the prize. Compartmentalize your pain. Believe me I understand. John gives such excellent advice. By the way the guy I sited was only 3 years older than you.
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
+=2=3=4=8=0=7=0=7=6=8=9=9=2.
massage him on WhatsApp
Nurses are so wonderful. Thank you for your service ❤
@@blueseptember2174 thank you.
I hope the mother with the two kids listened to every word you said and left that creep.
@29:41 Writing down is such a great advice. My sister told me to write down my trauma backward/opposite. I used to have trust issues. I wrote down, "I'm healthy, I trust in men, and I trust my boyfriend." Now it helped me a lot.
Nikki, I lived your life. I stayed for 15 years. It doesn't get better. LEAVE!! For yourself and your boys! By staying you are showing your boys that this is a way a man treats a woman. Trust me my kids are now 26,24, 22 and I see how staying hurt them. We all want WHOLE relationships, this is not one. Please trust me on this. Leave and don't look back. Wishing you all the best.
Perfectly said. Tragically, I stayed for a few more years, even knowing that. It is unfathomable how far we will let this go. So very sad.
Can you tell how staying hurt them? I want to know I made the right decision and it helps to hear from those that have been there.
Agreed. I regret staying. I showed my kids poor role models for marriage. And his actions, his lack of support, and criticism wasn't good for me or the kids. I regret marrying him, and I regret staying.
@blueseptember2174 the kids have very little self esteem. They talk about walking on eggshells around their dad, even as adults. I know my son treats his fiance like buddy, not like he should. My daughter is depressed and has a hard time getting out of bed, even as an adult. Me too. I eventually went and got another job and got my own place. But still return from time to time for business. Every time I'm back, I can't get my work done because it's all about him. He prioritizes himself with access to the bathroom etc. he gets upset when things don't go as planned. He is yelling even when I'm on a business call.
It's just a reminder that I was very young and stupid, even at 30, when I got married.
I am still in that life, I hope Nikki ran far, far away
Omg the last caller I'm crying . I'm in a similar situation. My husband says I looked better before I got pregnant . He constantly tries to tell me what to do. No respect. His advice hit me hard. Thank you John
This is why I’m scared to start a family
Leave him now. I'm 7 months into a marriage. I wish I didn't spend a second.
Just curious did he show any signs of this kind of behaviour towards you or this type of misogyny towards other women before you got pregnant, or did the pregnancy flip a switch in him?
@@woboznzNo he didn't show this before I got pregnant. He doesn't have a great relationship with his mother because she put him and his siblings through hell. When I had the mood swings while pregnant he would say I was mean to him and honestly I wasn't . He didn't care to understand what women go through when I tried to explain it
@@shashamarie4760It'll be 8 years of marriage this year . 10 years together total.
Smh that poor woman with the 2 kids and the jerk. I hope she left he doesn't love, adore, protect or provide for her. I hope she listened.
I love how Deloney dealt with Andrew’s case. I feel so sad for Andrew’. I heard the pain in his voice. I’m sending positivity his way . I hope he catches a break. Sigh.
I hope he’s with the Ramsey programme and doesn’t have financial issues to make things worse.
💯
People don't have to follow Ramsey to be financially well. I disagree with a lot of Ramsey's methods.
Nikki is a kind of friend who asks for advice but never acts on it. Know your worth girl 🤦🏽♀️
I greatly empathize with the man who has been injured. I have dealt 20 years of pain from an automobile accident. My ❤ goes out to his situation.
How this sweet girl is laughing under her tears is so touching. She has a whole world inside of her. Go get it, girl 💜
The last caller is 1000% not leaving her baby daddy. Good luck to her.
She doesn't believe she deserves better...yet. She's young. She will have enough one day and finally believe she deserves better. I was her. 😊
Andrew in Los Angeles: Wishing you luck in finding your new purpose.
Dear One with the two little ones ... 2 children & 6 years is long enough. It doesn’t appear he wants to be in it for the long haul. PLEASE recognize your worth! And your kids too. Wishing he’d mature and respect you will not make it happen. I know this from experience... I’m completely embarrassed to say I stayed with a man that promised he wanted to marry me for 9 years! Don’t make the mistake I made. His lack of ability to see your value is NOT your fault. You CAN have respectful love in your life. It will be hard ... but you CAN do it! My love and prayers are with you. 🙏🏼💕
☝️
I can never understand why you women expect men to see this so called value in you. You are not seeing you from his perspective. Perhaps he does not see the same "value" you see in yourself. Instead of assuming that you're valuable to him, try asking him pertinent questions about how he sees you and perhaps you will find out that you are not as valuable as you think, or he's not seeing what you think you are projecting.
Coming from a good place. Stop assuming. Ask questions.
@@marvinanthony1172 facts! You cheapen your “value” when you stay with a man based on assumptions. Always figure out what their intentions are and don’t assume that you are beneficial to everyone. You are not entitled to appreciation from someone that doesn’t appreciate you
@@salma_Nella22 I concur. "you are not entitled to appreciation from someone that doesn't appreciate you". Well said!
John handled this call well
I felt for Andrew because I have watched a family member who was vital, active and a force to be reckoned with, deal with a spinal cord injury that has left her a quadriplegic. She has fought pain, depression, doctors and caregivers who did little. Some even told her she would not live 5 years - she would likely die of infection. Fast forward, her husband takes great care of her. She has a few good doctors. They travel. She has an ATV that is rigged with a harness and adaptive tech to let her few arm muscles that work let her drive off road. She has done a tandem sky dive. (Her former spinal cord advisor did too, and asked, "What's gonna happen? I already broke my neck!") Her good advisor told her to get well over the next two years. Then, have something to do and to work for. Andrew, there is life ahead! It can still be an adventure.
The tears are just rolling down my face as you called James. So awesome. Such a therapeutic show
Lovev's life true love Never die I know a great and powerful healer that can get back your ex or crua without delay Just forever within 48hours he helped me too immediately
Text him on WhatsApp
+1=2=0=.4=8=0=.8=2=2=3=4.
If Nikki ever reads these comments, I hope she realizes that she deserves more than that poor excuse of a boyfriend! Someone who’s worth your time will not talk to you like this!!! You CAN make it away from him. You can’t burn brightly if someone is always putting out your flame. ❤️
💯
Agreed. Dude seems like a scumbag. Why hasn’t he proposed?!
Yes!!! 💯
Preach!!
It was so hard to hear her tearing up on the call! Poor girl, and the laughter is almost nauseating too like she doesn’t understand the gravity of how he treats her
Super emotional listening to Andrew's story. John, you are so amazing, getting into the problem, emotion and mapping out the rout to the solution. I'm so inspired listening to you. How incredible, you have the ability to change people's perspectives so that in turn they can change their path. What a gift you have x
I completely agree!! 👍🏻
Nikki, my love, after a 20-year relationship and him emotionally abusing me just like your BF is doing to you. Is not ok leave baby leave for you for those babies it's the best thing don't waste another second on him. Because he will find someone else and leave you when he can't take anything else from you. You are a beautiful mother and you deserve the world! You can get through this and more. ❤❤❤
I was married for 14 years we divorced 5 years ago and I jumped back into a relationship, as this relationship went on I realized that I was the reason for the divorce and I’ll never change and now 4.5 years later this relationship is over and I’ll never change, I’m not a cheater or anything like that I just have problem with communication so I think it’s time for me to be alone I’m 52 and I learned life does go on and spend time with me
It’s doesn’t take 6 years to figure out if you want to marry someone. On a side note, I tell my girls ALL THE TIME to be careful who they have babies with. If you marry someone, you can always get a divorce. If you have a baby with someone, you are stuck dealing with them (in most cases) for at least 18 years.
It may not of taken you that long but everybody is different and everybody is in different circumstances.
Actually, it’s forever. That person will affect your children’s lives forever.
I have never been Married (but I am a Mother)... getting a divorce and having a baby with someone.. both life changing.
Dr. Deloney is doing some really good work. He keeps getting better and better.
I love how you inspired the young man who became injured. I was inspired.
I have to say... every time I wash dishes I say to myself it's time to listen to Delony.😂
Me too! Haha!
It's a vibe!
Same! Lol
I do this but with cooking lol
Me too!
To Nikki: He WILL leave you for a younger, fitter model. GET OUT NOW. HE NEEDS YOU, until he finds some other chick to take care of him
Dr Jonh Daloney is doing a miracle work. We are all so appreciative for all that you do. God blessed you! 🙏🙏🙏
BLESSINGS, COURAGE & STRENGTH to Andrew ❤❤❤❤
My heart goes out to Nikki. Now being a mom myself. Oh my goodness is it hard being home with not only 1 but two little ones...Sister..GO LIVE YOUR LIFE. There is so much more for you.
I’m not yet on Nikki’s story but am seeing this comment. Whats more than being a mother and loving your children? As in, why are you implying they are ruining her and her ability in life?
The gentleman that called in about his feet ran over and disability my ears hear him .Thank you for being so brave I feel like you do .I have herredity angiodemia and is life threatening daily .keep going my friend you got me to reach out .thank you .
Nikki, what are you doing??? I felt so sorry for her! Move on. The second you move on, you will gain motivation for yourself and your kids. Some of these 'men' are so selfish its mind boggling. Jocko will 100% disapprove.
Massive congrats James. I truly hope by now it is 11 years… 💪I can do anything for a day. Love love love it
I feel for Niki. No one deserves this from any one, especially a guy whose sole purpose is to make you and your kids feel happy and safe. it’s true that kids will absorb their environment, I grew up with parents that never separated but they should’ve. I would prefer to have seen both my parents happy apart. It ruined all my siblings views on marriage and our relationships, and consequently our relationships with our own kids.
Same, i feel that so hard.
😥😥😥
Andrew, keep going. You can do it. You have a story to tell. You don't need to get up from that chair to be amazing. Don't give up you sound amazing.
I really feel for the young man who talked about the accident and also the loss of his brother. And also... have a feeling things are going to go well for him. What obstacles to overcome they are.. somehow I believe he can. 💖
I am now a fan. This show must be seen by many people. John is a good coach ❤️
Omg alieshas story is my own currently! Seperated still living together. There are so many feeling still floating around. We have the best days sometimes and the spark comes back. It's so tiring. I want to be worthy of someone's love.
You ARE worthy. Even in the moments you don’t FEEL it, feelings can be misleading.
OMG you are amazing Dr. Jhon delony. Even after years , Your show still inspiers and guieds. your intention, your methods and the empaty and genuine care you have for your callers is wonderful. Keep up the great work you and your team are doing. Keep going dont stop.
I would so much rather be with a person with any type of disability who is so open, honest and a good person than half the men out there who are not loving and kind. Your wife loves you! Most women like to be "carers" in some way and what they give you, you can give back to them with love and affirmation which is a rare thing for us and makes women feel happy and fulfilled.
Please be positive. You have great future ahead of you. Wishing you all the very best from the UK. XxX
Praying for you, Andrew!
Love how Dr John challenges and encourages Andrew! God still has a plan for you and can still use you sweet Andrew your testimony can change lives and touch so many❤ God Bless you - all the best!
You can do it Andrew!!! Keep living and loving! Find your God given purpose and go for it. Often, finding someone else for you to help makes a tremendous difference in ourselves.
My heart and prayers gobout to Andrew i know exactly how he feels. I became disabled from a work accident and it changed .y life forever. Lost my confidence, my husband and my control on my mental health 😢
My to do list includes feed baby, make lunches, eat lunch, make dinner, change nappies (diapers). Then I have the optional things after that if I can: read books to kids, clean, do dishes, tidy toys, laundry on, laundry dry, laundry folded, laundry away. It helps a lot to cross things off, and write what else you do as it comes up- that way you know, and others can see exactly what a day looks like.
I respect how Andrew and John had a real conversation about moving on versus sitting down. 🐢
Dr John you are a good man thank God for you.
Aleisha in North Carolina: I wish you healing and much love in your future. Take care of yourself and your babies.
They had kids to try to fix their broken marriage. That never works. I feel for these girls.
WOW her situation is crazy!!
Not they. Do men ever have kids as an attempt to fix a marriage?
@@jarelchico hm. Good point
@@jarelchico it takes 2 people to make a kid lol
My heart goes out to Andrew... I pray he's starting to feeling more positive & achieving his goals. ❤️
Nikki, GET OUT!! John is right.
Hey James! Happy almost decade of sobriety man. I don’t know if johns gonna call you again this year, but we’re all still out here rooting for you man ◡̈
Congrats James!!!! Huge! 9 years! Congrats on the marriage and the baby on the way!
Thank you so much for this one. I had a back injury and got nerve damage. My foot is permanently immobile. That's the short of it. I went through depression and developed panic disorder. It was horrible. I'm doing better now. I've learn to get around and join in life. But this brought me to tears because I totally identify. Thanks for being vulnerable to get on this show and talk about it. You are not alone. I was 27 years old when it happened.
I agree, I love your show. For someone with so many credentials, you are so down to earth and easy to relate to. Good luck and I wish you continued success.
Wow John, you really outdid yourself this time. Nice wrap up to this video. Holding mothers up high the way you did. Thank you for your support. You are one of a kind.💝♥️
I just want to say how happy I’m to have found this channel. I love the way Dr. John gives advice in all the shows. Great Job!!!! We all need this free therapy❤
Thank you Dr. Delony for your brilliant approach to tough issues and help people answer their mountain. I love your direct approach, direct solutions and how you call people to their own action. Absolutely brilliant, beautiful, inspiring! Thank You! ❤🙏🏻
So much pain in the world that is self inflicted! No one can make us happy or miserable--we do that to ourselves! I'm sorry for the ones that feel they can't leave the misery! The unknown is better than the painful now!!
He needs deliverance. The enemy is trying to oppress that young man. Prayers for him !!!
The last lady reminds me of the song lyrics "free is just another word for nothing left to lose"
I don't know if this would be of any help and I can't deal with it from like the PTSD part but my TH-cam channel is where I show how I do things from a wheelchair. It may help the gentleman with the hurt feet to do some things sitting. I live independently I can work and completely take care of myself from a physical standpoint (pun intended) all from sitting. He will obviously need help to deal with the pain physically and mentally but from a task perspective there are ways. And I'm more than happy to talk to him or his wife and be of encouragement
Good for you! I hope he checks out your channel!
Such a lovely offer 💖 I hope he sees this and checks out your channel!
@@chezlou812 thx I hope he will reach out to me
Cheating on somebody really hurt it’s hard to forgive someone
I hope Andrew let's John's strong words really penetrate his heart. I knew before he said it their was a religious element. I am a very strong Believer and follower of Christ, AND we have done ourselves a disservice by thinking that God will heal every broken bone or relieve all suffering. That is not the message of the Bible. We are not guaranteed health, but we are guaranteed the Lord's goodness and closeness when we go through difficulties. In the last year, we have experienced so much that people have had the nerve to say that we were in sin...if they knew the Lord, they would have seen clearly that our hearts were filled with joy, we had opportunity to pray with people who hurt us because their lives were broken, and God provided without fail the whole time. I am now walking, in nursing school, my husband is working, and our children have witnessed the truth of God's word be evident in our lives. We aren't promised easy, we are promised His word and His presence. I pray that Andrew would remember that God's grace and mercy have followed him and his wife ALL the days of their lives...even in the accident. He endured the cross. He won't run from your pain, sweetheart. Lord, restore joy and peace to their home, please. In Your powerful name!
I went thru a terrible trauma but when I finally realized the pain wasn't good but the lessons I learned could be a blessing to others and that gave the trauma and healing a purpose. It was when I started to heal. It took a long time but it worked.
I picture Nikki's boyfriend coming home from work, walking in the door, holding a clip board and grilling her about what she's done all day, as he marks off pass/fail boxes he's making qrunting noises while looking over his glasses that he's wearing at the end of his nose, and disappointingly shaking his head back and forth like a supervisor at work... 🤦♂️
Your soul will tell you when relationship is over.
Think of the person, and your soul will tell you.
Oh yes, it’s real......deep, but real.
Your soul guides you when you are quiet, and listen
I would have to disagree…
I agree. Once you learn to listen to it!
How can I tell the difference of my heart, mind or soul when asking questions?
Agreed! I so enjoy when he’s gone and dread seeing him driving up. Time for him to go!
Agree! I love that you made this comment. It speaks to me. I often get clarity and perspective about my situation in the small time after I wake up in the morning. If I don’t write it down, things get clouded again as the day progresses and I don’t understand my situation again. I have wondered what that phenomenon is. You explained that very succinctly. Makes sense. Thank you commenter
„Which part of you two wanted to work on the relationship, the you-part?“ 😂 Nailed it
I’ve watched a lot of episodes but this one.. watching you speak life and patience and love into this guy… just makes me wanna hug you John and say I love you in a really non creepy weirdo way. Just as a human being
Oh my goodness. That makes 2 of us.
If I was the one run this talk show, there would be 10 boxes of tissues on the desk.... Amazing Dr. John and very very good wishes for you Andrew, so sorry, you will feel better day by day.
I knew my relationship was over when i was sitting on a therapy chair on my 4th session on 30th dec 2024, alone and crying and debating on y i should be in the relationship when the other person is not even willing to have a conversation with me, let alone morally being there where he is okay letting me suffer and die, thats the moment i knew, its over.
I tried explain him next morning and then broke it off
Omg! Run for the hills Nikki!!!! You are worth more than that sister! It’s him mama…not you. You are doing fabulous. Big hugs mama. ❤
I feel so much for the newly disabled man ❤ I love you sir, keep fighting your fight my love. I wish I could take all your pain from you ❤ horrible situation all around, God bless your brother too
I almost cried hearing what he told the lady with the live in ex and twins. I like his directness. I need him as a counselor.
That call with Andrew was heavy and so beautiful. If you need someone to hang out with Andrew, I also live in LA. Thanks for being so open.
These episodes have been slapping recently !
I related to Andrews story so thank you for calling, and thank you for the advice!
It never heals. Move on and don’t make that same mistake again.
Ah ha. The algorithm brought me to the origins of the pink note that simply said “cheater” and Dr. J couldn’t remember why it came in the mail 😂
I love this dude. John God bless you brother!!
The man in the wheel chair is so anointed and called by God. And those suicidal dreams are an attach from the enemy. He needs to pray like Job, and then heal and start working in his calling. That’s how you KNOW you’re called by God is when the enemy tries to take you out.
Best moment in the whole video 41:46
Dr D.: Nikki. Uh uh.
Heart breaks for this girl!