I’m sorry your struggle isn’t being taken with respect and compassion . My heart is with you and I hope you find the help and resources you deserve . Blessings and good luck
@Funmilola I fully understand how you feel.People think ADHD is just a myth or a silly excuse for laziness.But let's keep on keeping on.WE SHALL OVERCOME 🤩
I’m 29 and only just now getting a diagnosis for ADHD. I never understood why I struggled so much when everyone else around me was thriving. I found your channel when I was desperate to find someone who has gone through something similar and your videos finally put into words what I’ve always felt. So, thank you for sharing your story.
I just got diagnosed two days ago. At first I was happy, relieved, like wait has been lifted. I finally know what’s wrong with my and why I am the way I am. But now I’m having a mental breakdown trying to understand it and how different my life could’ve been if I was diagnosed sooner. It’s scary trying rewire your brain and wished you couldn’t done things differently. This video was very supportive.
This is the way I have felt for years! Everyone seems to be thriving around you and you can’t seem to catch up or get to where you want no matter how hard you try to focus and work hard. Can I ask are you in the U.K. ? And how are you going about getting a diagnosis ?
I’m 41. I work my ass off but I can’t save or even pay bills on time. I’m behind on everything. I’m being crushed financially. My ADHD and lack of discipline have ruined my life. I wish i started fixing it before today but it gives me hope knowing I’m not the only 40+ year old facing these troubles.
Not trying to make a contest out of suffering, just sharing…not being diagnosed is one thing. But in my case I was diagnosed by the school psychologist at age 9. But my parents decided not to listen. 🤦🏻♂️ I feel like it hobbled the next 25-30 years of my life. Your life story perfectly echoes mine. I had the opportunity to go to college but couldn’t focus. (I was also religiously brainwashed and spent a lot of time at church.) Barely graduated, then went from dead end job to dead end job quitting every 2-3 years. Impulsively married a girl and had a kid, got divorced few years later. Didn’t learn how to save money or make long term plans. I literally reached out to my doctor today to try and get treated. Hopefully I can start turning my life around! Thanks for sharing your story. It makes me feel less alone and things are slowly starting to make sense.
Great video. I really appreciate that you included people in their 40s, 50s, and beyond. It's so depressing to be at an age where society expects you to have already attained certain things (stable career, home ownership, children, etc) and realize how little you have accomplished. Thank you for the reminder that it's NEVER too late.
Money problems based on bad emotional decision making. Yes!!! Thanks for shedding light on this important topic...I know it effects a lot of us with adhd...
The best way I found around this is a budget spread sheet and have six different bank accounts for the different financial areas of my life and it works. I have both Aspergers and ADHD Inattentive, Anxiety and Depression
Never got the diagnosis. But I had an epiphany around a year ago. I found out accidentally what ADHD is really about and started researching. Everything clicked suddenly. The story of my life and struggles are identical to the people who were diagnosed. I am now at a process of repairing my life after wasting the youth. Or I should say, about to start this process. Accumulation of mistakes resulted in depression and anxiety but need to push through. Your content is really good. Channel deserves more views.
Lulasz I feel the same way, but the places I could go to for a diagnosis all have terrible reviews and I’m worried they would just telll me to fuck off
Elias check out Psychiatry-UK even if u are not in UK you could consider it only if your country would allow a UK registrated Psych’s Analysis Its done via video call and is value for money. There portal is really well made.
I relate so much to you. The thing you said about making wrong choices, wasting time, and time blindness is so true. I feel my ADHD stole at least 15 years of my life. The place where I am at 40 in terms of a sense of direction, career, and awareness in general, most people reach there in their twenties. Luckily, I was never into spending money, but I would always over commit and get exited about new ideas and projects.
In ADHD, U r very much suspicious in finding Freind's,relationship ,socialising . Bcoz u hurt in every thing of hypersensitivity. And then whole day ruined by dwelling,uninteresting,unwilling,mood swings, why why analysis. Why he/she said this n bla bla...
Thankyou so much I'm 63 diagnosed at 58 started meds last year all what you said is a carbon copy of my life been thru 3 marriage bankrupt twice two failed business no pension a guy said years ago john your the cleverest toolmaker I know but I'm smart he has big house big car not jealous just sad with my life and really sad I never knew some 30+ years ago
John I Dont know you but its never too late to start again. Its different now for you so why not see the positive side of the diagnosis. Keep going! Start where you are now.
34 years old and JUST got diagnosed this morning with combined ADHD. I feel validated because I knew I had it for a long time I just hadn't gotten around seeing a professional about it.
I loved this. Exactly me 43 now and self diagnosed about 2/1/2 years ago. Everything finally makes sense just as he descripes. I care too much is one of my lifelong stuggles with an eternally broken heart for all the innocent creatures that suffer at the hands of humans inhumane treatment. Makes me feel broken inside
Hi, I’m a 47 year old Mum of a 4 year old and am one year in on my diagnosis of ADHD, inattentive. I always knew something was wrong but I always worked in unskilled jobs to pay the bills. Depression and anxiety have been constant companions throughout life, perhaps caused by my ADHD. Right now I’m in a ‘catch up’ phase both cognitively and educationally. I could punch my younger self as well but I really had no guidance, no one who recognised my struggles and I hold a lot of resentment over that as well. My life is so much better post diagnosis, I’m just sad it didn’t happen 40 years ago. Thank you for your videos, they have brought me much peace, validation and inspiration to keep moving forward. Thank you again.
Undiagnosed for over 70 years. Utterly chaotic traumatic life punctuated by moments of brilliance and achievement. Now just on my own, retired, playing games on the iPad and pottering in the garden. Low dopamine seizures sometimes. Never did get to grips with money, though I’m a lot less impulsive now. I wish I’d been diagnosed, treated and advised when young, I’m just too exhausted now to change much. Everything you say here could be me too! Your advice is excellent…wishing you strength and success ❤
I'm laying here balling right now, all my life people told me why do you think like I do, I would just just think something was wrong with them not me. I'll be 70 in 3 months, and now realize it's me, I never thought it was a problem, because I "knew better", .... feeling really guilty now for the way I screwed up things that should have gone better for my family... I'm having a hard time trying to adjust my feelings and attitude ..... I'll have to finish this at some other time, having a mental breakdown over this at the moment. But thanks for the new start.
Damn my man, I'm half your age being officially diagnosed a year ago, and the number of situations I realize that were sabotaged b/c of my adhd is staggering. To find out at your age i dunno how id handle it. Finding out you truly do experience many things in the world differently from others, and all the problems that can arise.. and that many of the reasons for.those problems being invisible for others (time blindness, disorganization (especially piling things on top of one another), not starting tjinfs until they are an emergency (going out for the evening or writing a paper for an assignment), and if you ain't interested then good luck focusing. wishing the best for you man.
I've just turned 35 and finally have my adhd assessment on Friday. I'm nervous. I'm worried and feel so lost. I'm aways making others family/friends smile and laugh. If I'm honest i feel like a failure yet I'm always starting and quitting. My head is honestly up my ass.
Do you find it tough putting your feellings & thoughts into words? I certainly do; that seems to be a trait of A.D.H.D. with the scattered mental activity suffered.
Hey man, been watching you for awhile now and just wanted to let you know that I appreciate all your wisdom and knowledge on how to live with ADHD. It's very comforting knowing that someone else is experiencing or has experienced many of the same problems. I'm finishing my Masters degree this year, in some (now less) debt from impulse spending, just over 30, and starting to actually see results. I was diagnosed and prescribed meds late last year and things are just...easier. I have developed systems for performing tasks now, and accomplished things that I used to set aside that were important (or, more important than whatever I'd be doing). Hope you're doing alright, and can't wait to see more videos and topics from you. Thanks.
Hi. This is the very first video I have seen. I’m 55, and newly diagnosed. I didn’t have all those troubles you talked about when I was younger (not that I can see.) But things have been going on with me since 2009 - when I quit a job of 23 years to go to college for the first time ever to become an RN. This stressed me out so bad, to the point I became physically ill. I did graduate, but I was so stressed the entire time. My first nursing job I was always late with my meds, and everything else I had to do. Anyhow, lots has gone on between then and now, and I am saying all this to ask you what kind of meds you are on. You said that things are better for you since then. I am on meds, and I notice a little improvement but not nearly what I need!!!! This time crap that is going on has to stop! I will go in the bathroom to take a “quick” shower, and come out 2 hrs later!!!! I don’t know what I’m doing to be in there TWO HOURS!! Please feel free to guide me to a video where I can learn about that, or what you did from personal experience, and also the medication that you are on. I know that not all meds fit all the people. I am just curious as to what you are on. Thanks for your help, and anyone else that would like to chime in!
You're so right about the time-blindness thing! It's so easy to get sucked into a distraction and just lose time. And then when you realize what happened, feel bad about yourself for losing the time yet again.
Was diagnosed a six weeks ago. At age 52. I can relate to everything you are saying. I am literally having to start over. But still trying to find the right medication and dosage. And holy hell is it EXPENSIVE here in the states. Don't know how much longer I can afford the treatment. Even if it works. And THANK YOU for putting this out. I need all the help I can get.
Towards the end when you talk about how you could slap yourself, it's why I practice self forgiveness almost daily. Really helps me be more kind to myself
So relatable. 30 and just started Concerta. Feel like I wished I had it earlier. So behind and embarrassed that I'm not at everyone else's level. Glad this video exists.
I'm sorry I keep commenting but this has been so helpful for me. I've felt lost for 36 years of my life and this discussion on this channel has removed the blinders and made me realize I'm not an anomaly and I'm not a bad person and most importantly, im not alone. Please keep making these videos, even if its just to share your experiences.
I swear even today i was thinking and saying all these thing to myself which you are saying in this video. You know i see you as a Magician who can read my mind so accurately..
I got my diagnosis last year at the age of 60, this is the hardest video I've watched. I still haven't been able to finish it because you are talking directly to me. It's a real smack in the face, I'm going to get through it but it's telling me my truth. Thank you so much
I was diagnosed when I was 13 years old. And I can really relate to this video, I stopped taking my concerta medication when I was 14 because I didn’t like the loss of appetite. Now I’m 26 years old and I’m exactly like this right now. I actually have a pretty damn good job. But I’m constantly using my vacation days, my personal days as soon as I get them. I’m sitting here watching this video with 35 dollars in my bank account and 10 dollars cash in my wallet. I’m constantly getting into new hobbies and buying stuff because it makes me feel good and when I go without going and and buying things and buying things online I feel empty. I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to not stop taking this medication, I feel like my life would be in a better place right now, I wouldn’t have lost all the jobs I had I wouldn’t have lost all the relationships I had.
My teachers never understood me. They always told me I was the difficult one. They would single me out as examples of what happens when you don't work but I wasn't ever trying to waste time. All I wanted was to be like everyone else but I could never keep my head locked on what I needed to be doing. It caused me to become very depressed and hard on myself for about 2 years until I found an actual good teacher that it was good with me. From there I had to backtrack and erase almost everything I've ever told myself. Which was very hard side note many people with ADHD probably know that there's constant voices in your head they never stop and my voices are terrible thoughts from years ago things my teachers used to say😢 thank God I'm doing better now. Who knows how far I would fall in that rabbit hole if it wasn't for my family and people that actually supported me adhd is serious and if not treated with care can cause serious mental damage.
@@mrtoad17-nintendo I relate to everything you said in your comment. I wasn't diagnosed until 23. 25 now and just starting medication. ADHD medication is the only thing that addresses the negative voices in my head. I'm sure we could all write books about how hard ADHD makes fitting into the modern world 😟 Hope you are well
I wasted many years aswell, my kick was sex and relationships and I still worry sometimes that I'm going to act like a fool in the future because of the dopamine rush it gives me. It's great to finally understand that I should have taken my diagnosis that I got at an early age seriously and I wish that the adults in my life back then would have too. But no matter, I've gotta look into the future now and do everything to get educated about ADHD in order to function. Thanks for sharing
2:59 Spending five years in a completely dead-end job being miserable and not actually taking any action to get out of it...This. This point exactly sums up my current life. Was telling my friends and family that I will be switching to a new job from end of 2021. Tried so hard to upskill myself, but was never able to stay consistent in that. While others were easily switching to a new job, it felt like a herculean task for me. I thought I was lazy and lacked the willpower. I blamed myself for everything, until I came to know about ADHD. Had consulted a psychiatrist and asked for a diagnosis. Got my results just yesterday. Now that I know why I was struggling so hard in my life, I will start to find a way that will work for me, rather than trying to fit myself into the neurotypical standard of living.
Mate, I really want to say a huge thank you for making these videos. I'm really grateful for that and I think it's brave and admirable that you would put yourself out there. I've recently discovered that I also suffer with adhd, and at 25 years old I now know the route cause of many issues and struggles within myself that have made life difficult at times. I hope you have a happy and fulfilling life. Cheers bro, keep up the great work. Many people appreciate your videos and you've inspired me to better myself too.
You're actually the first person i actually subscribe to because i like them. I feel we could be good friends IRL. Anyway, i am late 20s, always knew something was wrong with me. We are very very similar however, my executive dysfunction is way too big. I couldn't even go to high school or keep a job more than 2-3 days. Reading online about what could be the cause i was such a fuck up, but it was only last year or so when i figured it was ADHD, and it explains my childhood and lots of other stuff. Got diagnosed recently, currently on Concerta 18mg, but it only worked the first 3 days or so, now after like 11 days, i don't even feel the withdrawal. And you know the funny part? I was actually considered smart, scored around 160 or 180 on an IQ test when i was in the first grade. I don't really believe in their accuracy, but i think i had a lot of potential. And because of hobby hopping i can do so many things, like photography, music creating, photo/video editing, writing, anything technology (both software and hardware). Anyhow, thanks for the videos. I never looked up to any TH-camr or anything like that, i guess you're the first. And the way you talk really calms me down, lately i've been feeling like shit. Good luck, mate.
I'm laying here balling right now, all my life people told me why do you think like I do, I would just just think something was wrong with them not me. I'll be 70 in 3 months, and now realize it's me, I never thought it was a problem, because I "knew better", .... feeling really guilty now for the way I screwed up things that should have gone better for my family... I'm having a hard time trying to adjust my feelings and attitude ..... I'll have to finish this at some other time, having a mental breakdown over this at the moment. But thanks for the new start.
Just found your channel and plan on pouring over all of the videos throughout the next week. 38 year old with ADHD but I was diagnosed at the age of 8. I made the mistake of going unmedicated after I turned 18 and didn't get back on meds until 6 months ago. I would say my ADHD contributed to my divorce, social isolation, and late blooming. It's been interesting how many times I've gone "ohhhh oh shit that's the adhd" while watching just a few of your videos so far. Thanks for putting yourself out there... It's nice to not feel so alone in this.
So relatable. This is a very important vid. I was diagnosed at 27, I'm 31 this year. I'm still struggling, I know I will win this though. Thank you for your guidance. Congrats on your Masters👏👏👏
Newly diagnosed F46. Chronic illnesses, fatigue, migraine, muscle tension, not being able to relax and no healthcare provider ever connected the dots... after I'm on disability I figure it out and spend lots of money on the best psychiatrist in my country. He saw it instantly. Relief.. grief... and how to find my way at 46...
Man, you really nailed it with the notion of buying things unnecessarily on credit just to get the dopamine rush. This really bit me in the ass. Over the years I had acquired a handful of credit cards and financed a few cars. Thing is, for quite some time I stayed perfectly on top of all my bills. Everything was paid in full and on time for over 10 years! This lead me to have REALLY good credit, which meant I could borrow more money. It all came to a head last year when I just couldn’t keep all my financial plates spinning and had to file for bankruptcy. It’s been over 6 months since then and I’m still struggling to get my finances under control.
When you find out about having ADHD and you then research ADHD and find other people with ADHD, you realise there are so many similar struggles. It's so sad. Thanks for the video. I agree that having a diagnosis is a game changer. You understand the foundation you are working from, and can address specific things.
Right, I've felt alone my entire life but reading other people's struggles with ADHD always reminds me that I'm not. It's way harder when you don't know why you are the way you are and nothing makes sense. Awareness is the uphill battle we face and there are still many people who outright deny it exists at all (total ignorance!)
44yo and just got diagnosed. As I learn about adhd, so much of my life becomes clear. I wish it wasn’t missed when I was younger. How different my life could be! My daughter also just got diagnosed at 15.5yo. This explains so much of her life too. I’m so glad she learned about adhd from a TH-camr she watches & was motivated to dive in and learn more. I thought she had adhd 5 years ago but the psychologist we were seeing dismissed it quickly. She had Lyme disease, & has sleep apnea & dyslexia/dyscalculia so all the issues were explained by that. But now that’s controlled and symptoms/traits are still there. Now I am trying to learn as much as I can so I can better learn to work with my brain rather than try to force it to function like other people’s brains and then be upset/discouraged when it doesn’t.
I had just got diagnosed a couple days ago, and hearing what you said in this video really resonated with me. All this talk about "why didn't I just think ahead, get my shit together, instead of constantly living in the moment". Like, I was aware, but just didn't give a damn. But, hearing someone else talk about these things, in a very similar way, certainly makes me feel like I'm not alone. Thanks so much 🥲
This is such good advice that it brings tears to my eyes as someone who has difficulties with purpose: "Its so important to find purpose in your life, even if it takes you until you are 75 years old, keep looking." - Stuart Anderson
Love your honesty! I can relate to all of this. I found eliminating alcohol the best thing to do. Mannnn!!! It really fuels my impulsive nature! Soon as i came into a bit of inheritance I started giving it to people. I had 5 grand which would have cleared my debts and gave me a little bit savings. But instead i gave my hippy uncle who lives in his van a grand, a homeless woman a grand and spiritual leader in Utah a grand 😭🤣 WTF!!! I litrally have a grand left. I know that if keep drinking (even a little sets me off) i'll be in debt again within a couple of weeks. I've had to 100% make some huge changes...my meds help a bit (Elvance) But need to look at my whole life and start getting control.
I appreciate how this channel is low key. So many channels try to make things jazzy with fast cuts and high energy, but this is calm enough that I can actually absorb the info.
I’m 42 and was recently diagnosed with ADHD. I can totally relate to everything you said! I’ve had nothing but problems in my personal life, social life, career and financial life. They put me on Adderall so I’m hoping it helps. I want to turn my life around before it’s too late!
I’m 21 and ever since I was kid trying to prove to everyone like parents, teachers, professionals, and especially myself that I can be someone worth remembering to society despite my so called “disability “…..now up to this point I’ve accepted or at least still trying to accept that no matter what I proved it was all for nothing. I’ve finally accepted after graduating highschool, though I didn’t deserve to, that I’m not the best for a lot of things and that I’m not worth much like everyone else who is considerd normal or gifted. I’ve accepted that I’m just another loser in life, for it doesn’t matter how hard I try or even get back up. Doesn’t matter if I succeed or not because I’ll always be behind….and before you say “doesn’t matter if you’re behind”, in reality it does because no one is gonna take a slow thinking person like me seriously. Like the hard truth no one cares what your struggles are and only focus on yourself, well how can I when everything I’ve ignored people saying up til now comes out to be true. Look I know I’m just bitching and whining, but my main point is that I’ve accepted now that I’m a loser through and through ….I didn’t want to when I was younger but the reality is I am….so why doesn’t my family just accept that and not just kick me out already…why is it that others can’t just leave me alone when I don’t say or do anything….just why.
I cried watching this. Currently in the process of getting a diagnosis. I want to do a degree but its scares me that i will get bored of it down the line. I wonder what my life would have been like if I'd known sooner.
I am 27 and I feel really immature I tend to talk to younger people than my age like teenagers.And it hurts me that I am not emotional mature when I talk to people my age they lose patience with me and think i am ridiculous and they are not informed about adhd and they just judge me. I just feel so lonely sometimes I do have a husband and get support from him but I just often feel misjudged by others.
Another big hurdle to overcome was high school vs. Real life. In high school I would doodle all over the spare whiteboard and teachers let me because i always knew the answers when they tested. In elementary school id actually get up and walk around the classroom in between rows or stare at the ceiling daydreaming lol but still knew those answers. And i was likable so the teachers didnt mind. I got picked up and dropped off at school. I'd hang with friends, skateboard, play video games etc.. i was also a great athlete in soccer, swimming, gymnastics, hap ki do. So physically i was in great shape.. then real life came and I could barely hold anything down. I had no long term planning, I was always late to work after i got to work 5-10 mins late i did work hard and was valuable. I was a great worker. But job after job i either was let go or quit, i had no vision for my future to go after. I loved photography and did so with a passion, but never wanted it as a money maker unles it was people buying my art. Anyway yeah, while i do great work while studying my cyber-sec I neglect so many basic things like laundry or a tidy room, not to an extreme like ive seen online but still a problem. And the time blindness, i can.go kn youtube to kill 30 mins and end up here for hours.
“Don’t beat yourself up it’s a waste of energy just focus on what you can do today and focus on your vision. It’s never too late to turn the direction of your life to something more positive. “ thank you
I'm 35 just diagnosed and relate to everything just said, Meds are changing my life. If you haven't had a diagnosis get one! I went private, best decision ever made
I'll be 52 in August and it's taken living again with my parents the past 5 years... Having the security of not freaking out about all that there is to live life, has, in a little time, given me the ability to perceive how life might be managed... I too have learned to keep a positive attitude... I've lived abuse, assault, bulling, discrimination, addiction, poverty, and disease which may never be cured... Some of which i hadn't realized how bad untill years later... And nobody notices the struggles because I'm smart and am well spoken, it's assumed I'm fine and managing well... Life does get better as we get older... a lot better! But that doesn't make what came before any easier... And i still have a steep path to climb just to get where most people live daily... Thanks for this... it's hard to think anyone else is in the world who truly gets it...
After breakup in anxious, one-sided love ,ve gone through depression, anxiety, panic attack , suicidal tendency, low self esteem, negative thoughts, made my life hell
I'm 34 and was diagnosed 3 days ago. Hearing your stories today is like looking into a mirror and puts a lot of things into perspective. I always figured these feelings and thoughts were normal for people in their late 20s, like some sort of an existential crisis. I've always said that I just 'ride the wave' of life, but without guidance you just hit a wall eventually. Thanks for sharing and helping me through the next few weeks. I'm hoping to pay it forward and put some videos together myself eventually. Cheers!
Thank you. I needed this. It's just what I needed. As I'm going out late at night to buy stg, in hopes that the mall is still open, while hearing u talk about impulse buying and buying stuff that are gonna benefit in the long run, I turned around to go back home, turn back to buy again, then turn back home alas... The sad music background just made me turn back home. Knowing that me buying it is a sad thing in the long run...I'm gonna waste my money away...thank you!
I from India ..and your subscriber too... I ve also gone through 13 expensive years doing nothing sitting at home and seeing my friends doing their career. But I don't found anything excitement,involving,engaging. My life ,obsessive anxious relationship , failure drove me unplanned destination Now I am running with hypertension in feelings, sensitive in criticism, ocd mind of thoughts,ay dreaming, illusion, insomnia
I'm 64yrs old & just recently diagnosed with ADHD. I make good money now, but my impulsive spending has left my savings on the low side. I'm finally using Dave Ramsey's Financial University program & and I actually see light at the end of the tunnel and it's not a train. I never understood why I couldn't save money. My 'had to buy this' urgency was always confusing since after I bought the item, left me feeling empty. Thank you very much for your insightful video. I'm a new subscriber.
Diagnosed last year (25 years old right now), and after my first month of getting medication for it, they decided they needed to drop those types of medications as to avoid the increased costs of the clinic being marked as a pain clinic. Found it hard to find anyone willing to prescribe it, but finally did 2 and a half months ago. I've been able to begin losing weight, starting to manage my finances, not acting as impulsive, etc. etc. Most of the times i tried to lose weight i usually get like 15-20 pounds down, and fall off hard. I would put myself into it fully but i also drop very hard when i experience "failure". This time around between the medication and some things i have learned through both this channel and other resources, i don't feel like i am constantly fighting myself anymore to do these things. I don't hate myself when i mess up. I can comfortably acknowledge that when i slip up, it's just that. Just a slip, and try to keep in mind, that it's a process and those mistakes will act as stepping stones and practice in becoming more capable of handling myself in new situations. So about 2 months, i'm down about 30 pounds now, and things are looking good. For reference i was up to 360, maybe even 370 at one point, wouldn't be surprised. Down to 330 and still going. So thank you for this content and thank you for sharing your personal experiences. You are doing something very good =)
I feel like that a lot too. And you will feel like that until you find something to be passionate about. I think we have to feel excited by something to feel motivation.
Im a 43 year old man you are a gid send thank you for this it's time to get some help adhd has ruined my life so far .. I have zero friends been single for 17 years I'm so linked lost and alone 😔 I used to thin k having nobody was the worst thing in the world but it really isn't its having people around you and still feeling lost .God bless
My child isn’t a bad student at studies and grades but despite putting in so much effort and time, the output just doesn’t tally with the input. And he wants to be a high achiever. Can’t believe he’s been diagnosed with ADD. All this time it’s such a silent thing that no teacher and even his parents ie us never picked it up. So glad we finally can pinpoint the problem. Hoping CBT will help.
I can so much relate to how you describe the struggle. I was diagnosed with ADHD first when I was around 10 years old, but at the time, there wasn't as much knowledge or awareness about ADHD where I live - or at least not enough so that I could utilize it at that time. Struggling with my emotional impulsiveness and outbursts - and people's reactions and rejection to my behavior - brought a lot of shame, which led me to turn away from ADHD instead of facing it. Now in my early 30s, I'm looking back and seeing exactly what you describe: A lot of bad decisions which I often blame myself for, and a feeling of helplessness and pessimism to the future - an inability to manage life, and to actively work on relationships with other people. Low self-esteem, depression, addiction, and a general urge to compensate for these feelings with short-term gratifications and pastimes, only to push away the negative feelings of powerlessness and anxiety for a brief moment. Only half a year ago, I began to understand how this all links to ADHD, what it means to have ADHD, and that there are ways to learn on how to live with it and overcome the disabilities that come with ADHD. Seeing videos like yours, from other people struggling with the same problems, has given me hope again that things can get better. I'm now at a turning point in my life, but eager to learn more about my ADHD and to work on it and take control of my life. Thank you for making these videos! Keep up the good work!
Hi, i want to let you know that your videos are amongst the most relatable on ADHD I've come across so far for myself. Being the same age as you, diagnosed at 27, and then trying to work your way up with finances, education, work and skills, managing consequences for all the wasted time, emotional regulation, trying to get the past sorted, trying to maintain a routine and schedule and taking care of myself, oh my god, everything, every aspect of it was relatable to the core. You even mentioned Jordan Peterson. Wow! Thank you for your vulnerability. Your work is a virtual support system and I'll regularly remind myself of that. Thanks again. Wishing you the best.
Thank you. I can't describe how much this spoke to me. I was just diagnosed at 28. Anything that's ever required sustained mental effort has been so daunting. Its set me so far back in life with my studies and passions. It took me 5 years to get through a 3 year degree and now I'm seeing all my fellow students flourishing in their careers, buying houses and getting married. I'm struggling to even get my foot in the door. I've been trying to learn guitar since I was 15 and I've barely made any progress. Everything has become much easier since I started taking medication but I can't stop thinking about how much better life could have been if i was diagnosed in high school. Do I have hope for the future? Yes but I wanted to prosper in my 20's and now I'll never get that chance.
Thank you for being honest about where you are at in your growth. I think that when all we see are the shiny "after pictures" with a brief commentary on how awful things were before, we expect immediate results...and that's what our brains are actively seeking. The quick hit of dopamine. Being an observer of someone else traveling the same road, but a little further ahead is SO much more motivating in the long term. You're doing great things by being vulnerable and open and I appreciate it.
I'm about to turn 29, and trying to finish my masters - which until recently seemed impossible, and about to seek a diagnosis. I can relate so much to all of this. I've never commented on a TH-cam video before but I had to say thanks so much for sharing!
Same here, only it’s Bachelors, with about half of the stuff for my masters somehow already done… (don’t ask me how I did that, I think it’s been by accident)
It’s a lonely road in Lagos Nigeria where even speaking about my struggle with adhd is met with ridicule. Thank you for your videos, they really help.
I’m sorry your struggle isn’t being taken with respect and compassion . My heart is with you and I hope you find the help and resources you deserve . Blessings and good luck
@Ana....may God bless your kind heart too dear
@Funmilola I fully understand how you feel.People think ADHD is just a myth or a silly excuse for laziness.But let's keep on keeping on.WE SHALL OVERCOME 🤩
I've told a few people and got only negative reactions. So I've decided to keep it a secret from now on.
@@LessonSmith you’re not alone. Even if it is just words from a keypad, we are here for you. You’re a superhero not a loser ❤️
“being deceived by your own lack of urgency” This rings so true!
I found the fact and decided to fix it at 50. Feels better than being suicidal feeling useless in my senior years
this
Yes! ❤️❤️❤️
Exactly.
I’m 29 and only just now getting a diagnosis for ADHD. I never understood why I struggled so much when everyone else around me was thriving. I found your channel when I was desperate to find someone who has gone through something similar and your videos finally put into words what I’ve always felt. So, thank you for sharing your story.
Are you going for an official diagnosis? 🙂
I just got diagnosed two days ago. At first I was happy, relieved, like wait has been lifted. I finally know what’s wrong with my and why I am the way I am. But now I’m having a mental breakdown trying to understand it and how different my life could’ve been if I was diagnosed sooner. It’s scary trying rewire your brain and wished you couldn’t done things differently. This video was very supportive.
@@skyeatsbirds same for me
This is the way I have felt for years! Everyone seems to be thriving around you and you can’t seem to catch up or get to where you want no matter how hard you try to focus and work hard. Can I ask are you in the U.K. ? And how are you going about getting a diagnosis ?
Same
"Being deceived by your own lack of a sense of urgency." really hit like a hammer. Damn.
THIS
I’m 41. I work my ass off but I can’t save or even pay bills on time. I’m behind on everything. I’m being crushed financially. My ADHD and lack of discipline have ruined my life. I wish i started fixing it before today but it gives me hope knowing I’m not the only 40+ year old facing these troubles.
I’m 48 and hoping to get diagnosed and get help if that makes you feel any better…
Thank you for sharing this. You are sooo not alone.
Definitely not alone x
I just got diagnosed and started meds at 44. I’ve got so much life-mess to clean up I don’t even know where to start. 🥺
sell 💊
This bloke speaks the truth , listen to him before its too late,!!!!!!!!
Raw. Open. Honest. So real. Thank you for this.
100% true mate. Working through this now. Lonely and long road but we gotta do it.
Its five months later, can you tell me about any progress?
Me too. I've been currently diagnosed at the age of 39!
Aww, but i don't wanna do it, maybe later
ADHD is lonely 100%.
@@bettyboop1742 hey ADHD sis
Not trying to make a contest out of suffering, just sharing…not being diagnosed is one thing. But in my case I was diagnosed by the school psychologist at age 9. But my parents decided not to listen. 🤦🏻♂️ I feel like it hobbled the next 25-30 years of my life.
Your life story perfectly echoes mine. I had the opportunity to go to college but couldn’t focus. (I was also religiously brainwashed and spent a lot of time at church.) Barely graduated, then went from dead end job to dead end job quitting every 2-3 years. Impulsively married a girl and had a kid, got divorced few years later. Didn’t learn how to save money or make long term plans.
I literally reached out to my doctor today to try and get treated. Hopefully I can start turning my life around!
Thanks for sharing your story. It makes me feel less alone and things are slowly starting to make sense.
Boys and girls. I hear and feel you. Same here. Absolute shit show in all areas, diagnosed at 45 and cleaning up the mess. Ouch
I am gonna use that😂 Shit show of a life till i was 49.
Great video. I really appreciate that you included people in their 40s, 50s, and beyond. It's so depressing to be at an age where society expects you to have already attained certain things (stable career, home ownership, children, etc) and realize how little you have accomplished. Thank you for the reminder that it's NEVER too late.
Money problems based on bad emotional decision making. Yes!!! Thanks for shedding light on this important topic...I know it effects a lot of us with adhd...
You shoud do a crossover interview!! Love your videos
Hilary Keegan I’m up for it!
The best way I found around this is a budget spread sheet and have six different bank accounts for the different financial areas of my life and it works. I have both Aspergers and ADHD Inattentive, Anxiety and Depression
I hear ya. I’m in such a financial mess as a result of my ADHDthat my life is pretty much over
@jmar28a are you making it? I'm new to knowing...let's restart together 😊
Never got the diagnosis. But I had an epiphany around a year ago. I found out accidentally what ADHD is really about and started researching. Everything clicked suddenly. The story of my life and struggles are identical to the people who were diagnosed. I am now at a process of repairing my life after wasting the youth. Or I should say, about to start this process. Accumulation of mistakes resulted in depression and anxiety but need to push through. Your content is really good. Channel deserves more views.
Lulasz I feel the same way, but the places I could go to for a diagnosis all have terrible reviews and I’m worried they would just telll me to fuck off
Elias check out Psychiatry-UK even if u are not in UK you could consider it only if your country would allow a UK registrated Psych’s Analysis
Its done via video call and is value for money. There portal is really well made.
I relate so much to you. The thing you said about making wrong choices, wasting time, and time blindness is so true. I feel my ADHD stole at least 15 years of my life. The place where I am at 40 in terms of a sense of direction, career, and awareness in general, most people reach there in their twenties.
Luckily, I was never into spending money, but I would always over commit and get exited about new ideas and projects.
In ADHD, U r very much suspicious in finding Freind's,relationship ,socialising .
Bcoz u hurt in every thing of hypersensitivity. And then whole day ruined by dwelling,uninteresting,unwilling,mood swings, why why analysis. Why he/she said this n bla bla...
Thankyou so much I'm 63 diagnosed at 58 started meds last year all what you said is a carbon copy of my life been thru 3 marriage bankrupt twice two failed business no pension a guy said years ago john your the cleverest toolmaker I know but I'm smart he has big house big car not jealous just sad with my life and really sad I never knew some 30+ years ago
Your story made me cry. I’m m so sorry.
John I Dont know you but its never too late to start again. Its different now for you so why not see the positive side of the diagnosis. Keep going! Start where you are now.
34 years old and JUST got diagnosed this morning with combined ADHD. I feel validated because I knew I had it for a long time I just hadn't gotten around seeing a professional about it.
I loved this. Exactly me 43 now and self diagnosed about 2/1/2 years ago. Everything finally makes sense just as he descripes. I care too much is one of my lifelong stuggles with an eternally broken heart for all the innocent creatures that suffer at the hands of humans inhumane treatment. Makes me feel broken inside
Hi, I’m a 47 year old Mum of a 4 year old and am one year in on my diagnosis of ADHD, inattentive. I always knew something was wrong but I always worked in unskilled jobs to pay the bills. Depression and anxiety have been constant companions throughout life, perhaps caused by my ADHD. Right now I’m in a ‘catch up’ phase both cognitively and educationally. I could punch my younger self as well but I really had no guidance, no one who recognised my struggles and I hold a lot of resentment over that as well. My life is so much better post diagnosis, I’m just sad it didn’t happen 40 years ago. Thank you for your videos, they have brought me much peace, validation and inspiration to keep moving forward. Thank you again.
Same with the unskilled in job
Undiagnosed for over 70 years. Utterly chaotic traumatic life punctuated by moments of brilliance and achievement. Now just on my own, retired, playing games on the iPad and pottering in the garden. Low dopamine seizures sometimes. Never did get to grips with money, though I’m a lot less impulsive now. I wish I’d been diagnosed, treated and advised when young, I’m just too exhausted now to change much. Everything you say here could be me too! Your advice is excellent…wishing you strength and success ❤
I'm laying here balling right now, all my life people told me why do you think like I do, I would just just think something was wrong with them not me. I'll be 70 in 3 months, and now realize it's me, I never thought it was a problem, because I "knew better", .... feeling really guilty now for the way I screwed up things that should have gone better for my family... I'm having a hard time trying to adjust my feelings and attitude ..... I'll have to finish this at some other time, having a mental breakdown over this at the moment. But thanks for the new start.
❤
Damn my man, I'm half your age being officially diagnosed a year ago, and the number of situations I realize that were sabotaged b/c of my adhd is staggering.
To find out at your age i dunno how id handle it. Finding out you truly do experience many things in the world differently from others, and all the problems that can arise.. and that many of the reasons for.those problems being invisible for others (time blindness, disorganization (especially piling things on top of one another), not starting tjinfs until they are an emergency (going out for the evening or writing a paper for an assignment), and if you ain't interested then good luck focusing.
wishing the best for you man.
I've just turned 35 and finally have my adhd assessment on Friday.
I'm nervous. I'm worried and feel so lost. I'm aways making others family/friends smile and laugh.
If I'm honest i feel like a failure yet I'm always starting and quitting.
My head is honestly up my ass.
The most relatable 5 minutes of my life did not even getting I'm gonna show my therapist this to explain what I exactly feel
Christopher Bolanos ditto
Do you find it tough putting your feellings & thoughts into words? I certainly do; that seems to be a trait of A.D.H.D. with the scattered mental activity suffered.
"how does th is make you feel" lol
Hey man, been watching you for awhile now and just wanted to let you know that I appreciate all your wisdom and knowledge on how to live with ADHD. It's very comforting knowing that someone else is experiencing or has experienced many of the same problems. I'm finishing my Masters degree this year, in some (now less) debt from impulse spending, just over 30, and starting to actually see results. I was diagnosed and prescribed meds late last year and things are just...easier. I have developed systems for performing tasks now, and accomplished things that I used to set aside that were important (or, more important than whatever I'd be doing).
Hope you're doing alright, and can't wait to see more videos and topics from you. Thanks.
Thanks bud
Hi. This is the very first video I have seen. I’m 55, and newly diagnosed. I didn’t have all those troubles you talked about when I was younger (not that I can see.) But things have been going on with me since 2009 - when I quit a job of 23 years to go to college for the first time ever to become an RN. This stressed me out so bad, to the point I became physically ill. I did graduate, but I was so stressed the entire time. My first nursing job I was always late with my meds, and everything else I had to do. Anyhow, lots has gone on between then and now, and I am saying all this to ask you what kind of meds you are on. You said that things are better for you since then. I am on meds, and I notice a little improvement but not nearly what I need!!!! This time crap that is going on has to stop! I will go in the bathroom to take a “quick” shower, and come out 2 hrs later!!!! I don’t know what I’m doing to be in there TWO HOURS!! Please feel free to guide me to a video where I can learn about that, or what you did from personal experience, and also the medication that you are on. I know that not all meds fit all the people. I am just curious as to what you are on. Thanks for your help, and anyone else that would like to chime in!
You're so right about the time-blindness thing! It's so easy to get sucked into a distraction and just lose time. And then when you realize what happened, feel bad about yourself for losing the time yet again.
Was diagnosed a six weeks ago. At age 52. I can relate to everything you are saying. I am literally having to start over. But still trying to find the right medication and dosage. And holy hell is it EXPENSIVE here in the states. Don't know how much longer I can afford the treatment. Even if it works. And THANK YOU for putting this out. I need all the help I can get.
I’m 40 & right now I can’t even get in the door to be seen. No one is accepting new patients. 😔
Bullseye, 100% on point. I've looked back many times and lost 5 years somewhere
Towards the end when you talk about how you could slap yourself, it's why I practice self forgiveness almost daily. Really helps me be more kind to myself
So relatable. 30 and just started Concerta. Feel like I wished I had it earlier. So behind and embarrassed that I'm not at everyone else's level. Glad this video exists.
This is probably the bravest video of self admission I have seen .... Well Done & Thank you Sir !
I'm sorry I keep commenting but this has been so helpful for me. I've felt lost for 36 years of my life and this discussion on this channel has removed the blinders and made me realize I'm not an anomaly and I'm not a bad person and most importantly, im not alone. Please keep making these videos, even if its just to share your experiences.
I swear even today i was thinking and saying all these thing to myself which you are saying in this video.
You know i see you as a Magician who can read my mind so accurately..
I got my diagnosis last year at the age of 60, this is the hardest video I've watched. I still haven't been able to finish it because you are talking directly to me. It's a real smack in the face, I'm going to get through it but it's telling me my truth. Thank you so much
This video made me cry. Thank you thank you thank you.
me too.
I was diagnosed when I was 13 years old. And I can really relate to this video, I stopped taking my concerta medication when I was 14 because I didn’t like the loss of appetite. Now I’m 26 years old and I’m exactly like this right now. I actually have a pretty damn good job. But I’m constantly using my vacation days, my personal days as soon as I get them. I’m sitting here watching this video with 35 dollars in my bank account and 10 dollars cash in my wallet. I’m constantly getting into new hobbies and buying stuff because it makes me feel good and when I go without going and and buying things and buying things online I feel empty. I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to not stop taking this medication, I feel like my life would be in a better place right now, I wouldn’t have lost all the jobs I had I wouldn’t have lost all the relationships I had.
Thanks for your honesty bro: you’re helping a lot of people
luke bart hey Luke I like your profile picture
“ADHD is an excuse” said no one with ADHD.
💯
Oh yes
My teachers never understood me. They always told me I was the difficult one. They would single me out as examples of what happens when you don't work but I wasn't ever trying to waste time. All I wanted was to be like everyone else but I could never keep my head locked on what I needed to be doing. It caused me to become very depressed and hard on myself for about 2 years until I found an actual good teacher that it was good with me. From there I had to backtrack and erase almost everything I've ever told myself. Which was very hard side note many people with ADHD probably know that there's constant voices in your head they never stop
and my voices are terrible thoughts from years ago things my teachers used to say😢 thank God I'm doing better now. Who knows how far I would fall in that rabbit hole if it wasn't for my family and people that actually supported me adhd is serious and if not treated with care can cause serious mental damage.
@@mrtoad17-nintendo I relate to everything you said in your comment. I wasn't diagnosed until 23. 25 now and just starting medication. ADHD medication is the only thing that addresses the negative voices in my head. I'm sure we could all write books about how hard ADHD makes fitting into the modern world 😟 Hope you are well
I wasted many years aswell, my kick was sex and relationships and I still worry sometimes that I'm going to act like a fool in the future because of the dopamine rush it gives me.
It's great to finally understand that I should have taken my diagnosis that I got at an early age seriously and I wish that the adults in my life back then would have too.
But no matter, I've gotta look into the future now and do everything to get educated about ADHD in order to function.
Thanks for sharing
Started the video at 1.75x and quickly tuned it down to 1.25, because the message resonated so much.
I appreciate having this available.
Thank you.
I’m 53 rebuilding my life now - better late than never - everything you say is sadly true. Thanks for the insights.
2:59 Spending five years in a completely dead-end job being miserable and not actually taking any action to get out of it...This. This point exactly sums up my current life. Was telling my friends and family that I will be switching to a new job from end of 2021. Tried so hard to upskill myself, but was never able to stay consistent in that. While others were easily switching to a new job, it felt like a herculean task for me. I thought I was lazy and lacked the willpower. I blamed myself for everything, until I came to know about ADHD. Had consulted a psychiatrist and asked for a diagnosis. Got my results just yesterday. Now that I know why I was struggling so hard in my life, I will start to find a way that will work for me, rather than trying to fit myself into the neurotypical standard of living.
Mate, I really want to say a huge thank you for making these videos. I'm really grateful for that and I think it's brave and admirable that you would put yourself out there.
I've recently discovered that I also suffer with adhd, and at 25 years old I now know the route cause of many issues and struggles within myself that have made life difficult at times.
I hope you have a happy and fulfilling life. Cheers bro, keep up the great work. Many people appreciate your videos and you've inspired me to better myself too.
You're actually the first person i actually subscribe to because i like them. I feel we could be good friends IRL.
Anyway, i am late 20s, always knew something was wrong with me. We are very very similar however, my executive dysfunction is way too big.
I couldn't even go to high school or keep a job more than 2-3 days.
Reading online about what could be the cause i was such a fuck up, but it was only last year or so when i figured it was ADHD, and it explains my childhood and lots of other stuff.
Got diagnosed recently, currently on Concerta 18mg, but it only worked the first 3 days or so, now after like 11 days, i don't even feel the withdrawal.
And you know the funny part? I was actually considered smart, scored around 160 or 180 on an IQ test when i was in the first grade. I don't really believe in their accuracy, but i think i had a lot of potential.
And because of hobby hopping i can do so many things, like photography, music creating, photo/video editing, writing, anything technology (both software and hardware).
Anyhow, thanks for the videos. I never looked up to any TH-camr or anything like that, i guess you're the first. And the way you talk really calms me down, lately i've been feeling like shit.
Good luck, mate.
I'm laying here balling right now, all my life people told me why do you think like I do, I would just just think something was wrong with them not me. I'll be 70 in 3 months, and now realize it's me, I never thought it was a problem, because I "knew better", .... feeling really guilty now for the way I screwed up things that should have gone better for my family... I'm having a hard time trying to adjust my feelings and attitude ..... I'll have to finish this at some other time, having a mental breakdown over this at the moment. But thanks for the new start.
I cried during this video. I am so happy I stumbled upon your channel.
yews
I have never related so much to anybody, not even my therapist like I do to you.
Thank you for this.
I feel like you're telling me about my own life. Lucky I found out sooner than some and now making serious progress. I've got a long way to go still.
48 years and at the end of my diagnosis. A brilliant video mate
Just found your channel and plan on pouring over all of the videos throughout the next week. 38 year old with ADHD but I was diagnosed at the age of 8. I made the mistake of going unmedicated after I turned 18 and didn't get back on meds until 6 months ago. I would say my ADHD contributed to my divorce, social isolation, and late blooming. It's been interesting how many times I've gone "ohhhh oh shit that's the adhd" while watching just a few of your videos so far. Thanks for putting yourself out there... It's nice to not feel so alone in this.
So relatable. This is a very important vid. I was diagnosed at 27, I'm 31 this year. I'm still struggling, I know I will win this though. Thank you for your guidance. Congrats on your Masters👏👏👏
Living with ADHD is one hell of a bumpy ride and people think it's just a lousy joke
Newly diagnosed F46. Chronic illnesses, fatigue, migraine, muscle tension, not being able to relax and no healthcare provider ever connected the dots... after I'm on disability I figure it out and spend lots of money on the best psychiatrist in my country. He saw it instantly. Relief.. grief... and how to find my way at 46...
Man, you really nailed it with the notion of buying things unnecessarily on credit just to get the dopamine rush. This really bit me in the ass. Over the years I had acquired a handful of credit cards and financed a few cars. Thing is, for quite some time I stayed perfectly on top of all my bills. Everything was paid in full and on time for over 10 years! This lead me to have REALLY good credit, which meant I could borrow more money. It all came to a head last year when I just couldn’t keep all my financial plates spinning and had to file for bankruptcy. It’s been over 6 months since then and I’m still struggling to get my finances under control.
Sorry to hear this Dan! Hope things improve for you.
When you find out about having ADHD and you then research ADHD and find other people with ADHD, you realise there are so many similar struggles. It's so sad. Thanks for the video. I agree that having a diagnosis is a game changer. You understand the foundation you are working from, and can address specific things.
Right, I've felt alone my entire life but reading other people's struggles with ADHD always reminds me that I'm not. It's way harder when you don't know why you are the way you are and nothing makes sense. Awareness is the uphill battle we face and there are still many people who outright deny it exists at all (total ignorance!)
44yo and just got diagnosed. As I learn about adhd, so much of my life becomes clear. I wish it wasn’t missed when I was younger. How different my life could be!
My daughter also just got diagnosed at 15.5yo. This explains so much of her life too. I’m so glad she learned about adhd from a TH-camr she watches & was motivated to dive in and learn more. I thought she had adhd 5 years ago but the psychologist we were seeing dismissed it quickly. She had Lyme disease, & has sleep apnea & dyslexia/dyscalculia so all the issues were explained by that. But now that’s controlled and symptoms/traits are still there.
Now I am trying to learn as much as I can so I can better learn to work with my brain rather than try to force it to function like other people’s brains and then be upset/discouraged when it doesn’t.
Thank you for your honesty. It's real. Good to see you are making a huge difference in the world.
Thank you so much. 💓 I'm 32 and the windows are finally open in my mind. Thank you for your words and insight I am very grateful.
I had just got diagnosed a couple days ago, and hearing what you said in this video really resonated with me. All this talk about "why didn't I just think ahead, get my shit together, instead of constantly living in the moment". Like, I was aware, but just didn't give a damn. But, hearing someone else talk about these things, in a very similar way, certainly makes me feel like I'm not alone. Thanks so much 🥲
This is such good advice that it brings tears to my eyes as someone who has difficulties with purpose: "Its so important to find purpose in your life, even if it takes you until you are 75 years old, keep looking." - Stuart Anderson
Love your honesty! I can relate to all of this. I found eliminating alcohol the best thing to do. Mannnn!!! It really fuels my impulsive nature! Soon as i came into a bit of inheritance I started giving it to people. I had 5 grand which would have cleared my debts and gave me a little bit savings. But instead i gave my hippy uncle who lives in his van a grand, a homeless woman a grand and spiritual leader in Utah a grand 😭🤣 WTF!!! I litrally have a grand left. I know that if keep drinking (even a little sets me off) i'll be in debt again within a couple of weeks. I've had to 100% make some huge changes...my meds help a bit (Elvance) But need to look at my whole life and start getting control.
I appreciate how this channel is low key. So many channels try to make things jazzy with fast cuts and high energy, but this is calm enough that I can actually absorb the info.
I’m 42 and was recently diagnosed with ADHD. I can totally relate to everything you said! I’ve had nothing but problems in my personal life, social life, career and financial life. They put me on Adderall so I’m hoping it helps. I want to turn my life around before it’s too late!
I’m 21 and ever since I was kid trying to prove to everyone like parents, teachers, professionals, and especially myself that I can be someone worth remembering to society despite my so called “disability “…..now up to this point I’ve accepted or at least still trying to accept that no matter what I proved it was all for nothing. I’ve finally accepted after graduating highschool, though I didn’t deserve to, that I’m not the best for a lot of things and that I’m not worth much like everyone else who is considerd normal or gifted. I’ve accepted that I’m just another loser in life, for it doesn’t matter how hard I try or even get back up. Doesn’t matter if I succeed or not because I’ll always be behind….and before you say “doesn’t matter if you’re behind”, in reality it does because no one is gonna take a slow thinking person like me seriously. Like the hard truth no one cares what your struggles are and only focus on yourself, well how can I when everything I’ve ignored people saying up til now comes out to be true. Look I know I’m just bitching and whining, but my main point is that I’ve accepted now that I’m a loser through and through ….I didn’t want to when I was younger but the reality is I am….so why doesn’t my family just accept that and not just kick me out already…why is it that others can’t just leave me alone when I don’t say or do anything….just why.
I cried watching this. Currently in the process of getting a diagnosis. I want to do a degree but its scares me that i will get bored of it down the line. I wonder what my life would have been like if I'd known sooner.
33 here and still struggling. Was just diagnosed this year. Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone.
Im 32 and knowing this its like you have to start learning live like all again
This channel is so poignant and means so much to me! ❤
I am 27 and I feel really immature I tend to talk to younger people than my age like teenagers.And it hurts me that I am not emotional mature when I talk to people my age they lose patience with me and think i am ridiculous and they are not informed about adhd and they just judge me. I just feel so lonely sometimes I do have a husband and get support from him but I just often feel misjudged by others.
I am sure many have already told you this. You have explained my life so specifically that it felt like I was watching a flashback of it
Another big hurdle to overcome was high school vs. Real life. In high school I would doodle all over the spare whiteboard and teachers let me because i always knew the answers when they tested. In elementary school id actually get up and walk around the classroom in between rows or stare at the ceiling daydreaming lol but still knew those answers. And i was likable so the teachers didnt mind. I got picked up and dropped off at school. I'd hang with friends, skateboard, play video games etc.. i was also a great athlete in soccer, swimming, gymnastics, hap ki do. So physically i was in great shape.. then real life came and I could barely hold anything down. I had no long term planning, I was always late to work after i got to work 5-10 mins late i did work hard and was valuable. I was a great worker. But job after job i either was let go or quit, i had no vision for my future to go after. I loved photography and did so with a passion, but never wanted it as a money maker unles it was people buying my art.
Anyway yeah, while i do great work while studying my cyber-sec I neglect so many basic things like laundry or a tidy room, not to an extreme like ive seen online but still a problem.
And the time blindness, i can.go kn youtube to kill 30 mins and end up here for hours.
I agree with you maybe you should do a segment on repairing the damage of undiagnosed ADHD! 🙂
“Don’t beat yourself up it’s a waste of energy just focus on what you can do today and focus on your vision. It’s never too late to turn the direction of your life to something more positive. “ thank you
I'm 35 just diagnosed and relate to everything just said, Meds are changing my life. If you haven't had a diagnosis get one! I went private, best decision ever made
I'll be 52 in August and it's taken living again with my parents the past 5 years...
Having the security of not freaking out about all that there is to live life, has, in a little time, given me the ability to perceive how life might be managed...
I too have learned to keep a positive attitude... I've lived abuse, assault, bulling, discrimination, addiction, poverty, and disease which may never be cured... Some of which i hadn't realized how bad untill years later...
And nobody notices the struggles because I'm smart and am well spoken, it's assumed I'm fine and managing well...
Life does get better as we get older... a lot better! But that doesn't make what came before any easier... And i still have a steep path to climb just to get where most people live daily...
Thanks for this... it's hard to think anyone else is in the world who truly gets it...
Life does get better? Maybe for you… lucky guy.
After breakup in anxious, one-sided love ,ve gone through depression, anxiety, panic attack , suicidal tendency, low self esteem, negative thoughts, made my life hell
I'm 34 and was diagnosed 3 days ago. Hearing your stories today is like looking into a mirror and puts a lot of things into perspective. I always figured these feelings and thoughts were normal for people in their late 20s, like some sort of an existential crisis. I've always said that I just 'ride the wave' of life, but without guidance you just hit a wall eventually.
Thanks for sharing and helping me through the next few weeks. I'm hoping to pay it forward and put some videos together myself eventually.
Cheers!
Thank you. I needed this. It's just what I needed. As I'm going out late at night to buy stg, in hopes that the mall is still open, while hearing u talk about impulse buying and buying stuff that are gonna benefit in the long run, I turned around to go back home, turn back to buy again, then turn back home alas... The sad music background just made me turn back home. Knowing that me buying it is a sad thing in the long run...I'm gonna waste my money away...thank you!
I cried listening to this. Thank you for posting!
I from India ..and your subscriber too...
I ve also gone through 13 expensive years doing nothing sitting at home and seeing my friends doing their career. But I don't found anything excitement,involving,engaging. My life ,obsessive anxious relationship , failure drove me unplanned destination
Now I am running with hypertension in feelings, sensitive in criticism, ocd mind of thoughts,ay dreaming, illusion, insomnia
It's OK. Forgive yourself for those wasted years. Self compassion is essential for well being.
I'm 64yrs old & just recently diagnosed with ADHD. I make good money now, but my impulsive spending has left my savings on the low side. I'm finally using Dave Ramsey's Financial University program & and I actually see light at the end of the tunnel and it's not a train. I never understood why I couldn't save money. My 'had to buy this' urgency was always confusing since after I bought the item, left me feeling empty. Thank you very much for your insightful video. I'm a new subscriber.
Diagnosed last year (25 years old right now), and after my first month of getting medication for it, they decided they needed to drop those types of medications as to avoid the increased costs of the clinic being marked as a pain clinic. Found it hard to find anyone willing to prescribe it, but finally did 2 and a half months ago. I've been able to begin losing weight, starting to manage my finances, not acting as impulsive, etc. etc. Most of the times i tried to lose weight i usually get like 15-20 pounds down, and fall off hard. I would put myself into it fully but i also drop very hard when i experience "failure". This time around between the medication and some things i have learned through both this channel and other resources, i don't feel like i am constantly fighting myself anymore to do these things. I don't hate myself when i mess up. I can comfortably acknowledge that when i slip up, it's just that. Just a slip, and try to keep in mind, that it's a process and those mistakes will act as stepping stones and practice in becoming more capable of handling myself in new situations.
So about 2 months, i'm down about 30 pounds now, and things are looking good. For reference i was up to 360, maybe even 370 at one point, wouldn't be surprised. Down to 330 and still going. So thank you for this content and thank you for sharing your personal experiences. You are doing something very good =)
I'm feeling good for you bro
I have 0 drive. I feel stagnant
I dont even have passion for anything
This is not good
I feel like that a lot too. And you will feel like that until you find something to be passionate about. I think we have to feel excited by something to feel motivation.
@@floriaskite938 yes, since that post I've become passionate about interior design and art. Hope you have found a passion. Ty
Yes I have thank you 👍
You have to find it. Good luck
What do you do if you’re still passionate about something but you’ve lost all motivation to do it or anything.
ty for that. hearing the stuff you been through was like hearing the stuff ive been through.
Im a 43 year old man you are a gid send thank you for this it's time to get some help adhd has ruined my life so far .. I have zero friends been single for 17 years I'm so linked lost and alone 😔 I used to thin k having nobody was the worst thing in the world but it really isn't its having people around you and still feeling lost .God bless
Great video mate. Diagnosed aged 29 last week, and you’ve basically nailed my twenties here. Careless, but constantly aware of being careless.
Was there anything you did to help this issue? I feel like I try really hard but nothing seems to just work out.
My child isn’t a bad student at studies and grades but despite putting in so much effort and time, the output just doesn’t tally with the input. And he wants to be a high achiever. Can’t believe he’s been diagnosed with ADD. All this time it’s such a silent thing that no teacher and even his parents ie us never picked it up. So glad we finally can pinpoint the problem. Hoping CBT will help.
I admire your vulnerability! Thank you for this video ♥️ Greetings from Greece 🇬🇷
I can so much relate to how you describe the struggle. I was diagnosed with ADHD first when I was around 10 years old, but at the time, there wasn't as much knowledge or awareness about ADHD where I live - or at least not enough so that I could utilize it at that time. Struggling with my emotional impulsiveness and outbursts - and people's reactions and rejection to my behavior - brought a lot of shame, which led me to turn away from ADHD instead of facing it.
Now in my early 30s, I'm looking back and seeing exactly what you describe: A lot of bad decisions which I often blame myself for, and a feeling of helplessness and pessimism to the future - an inability to manage life, and to actively work on relationships with other people. Low self-esteem, depression, addiction, and a general urge to compensate for these feelings with short-term gratifications and pastimes, only to push away the negative feelings of powerlessness and anxiety for a brief moment.
Only half a year ago, I began to understand how this all links to ADHD, what it means to have ADHD, and that there are ways to learn on how to live with it and overcome the disabilities that come with ADHD. Seeing videos like yours, from other people struggling with the same problems, has given me hope again that things can get better. I'm now at a turning point in my life, but eager to learn more about my ADHD and to work on it and take control of my life.
Thank you for making these videos! Keep up the good work!
Hi, i want to let you know that your videos are amongst the most relatable on ADHD I've come across so far for myself. Being the same age as you, diagnosed at 27, and then trying to work your way up with finances, education, work and skills, managing consequences for all the wasted time, emotional regulation, trying to get the past sorted, trying to maintain a routine and schedule and taking care of myself, oh my god, everything, every aspect of it was relatable to the core. You even mentioned Jordan Peterson. Wow! Thank you for your vulnerability. Your work is a virtual support system and I'll regularly remind myself of that. Thanks again. Wishing you the best.
Thank you. I can't describe how much this spoke to me. I was just diagnosed at 28. Anything that's ever required sustained mental effort has been so daunting. Its set me so far back in life with my studies and passions. It took me 5 years to get through a 3 year degree and now I'm seeing all my fellow students flourishing in their careers, buying houses and getting married. I'm struggling to even get my foot in the door. I've been trying to learn guitar since I was 15 and I've barely made any progress. Everything has become much easier since I started taking medication but I can't stop thinking about how much better life could have been if i was diagnosed in high school. Do I have hope for the future? Yes but I wanted to prosper in my 20's and now I'll never get that chance.
This video hits home so hard. I’m 39 and I’m finally ready to get a diagnosis. Enough is enough.
It's much needed. Yeah Thanks brother...
You remind me of a younger version of myself. I appreciate your efforts and encouragement. Keep up the great work.
You seem a really lovely genuine guy. Listening to your story rings so much truth with my own. Keep up the fantastic work matey :0)
Thank you for being honest about where you are at in your growth. I think that when all we see are the shiny "after pictures" with a brief commentary on how awful things were before, we expect immediate results...and that's what our brains are actively seeking. The quick hit of dopamine. Being an observer of someone else traveling the same road, but a little further ahead is SO much more motivating in the long term. You're doing great things by being vulnerable and open and I appreciate it.
This is me just sat there and wasted time. Don't like doing things you're meant to like. Or anything healthy that is. Thank you for sharing ❤
Absolutely perfectly put. God you know your stuff.
I'm about to turn 29, and trying to finish my masters - which until recently seemed impossible, and about to seek a diagnosis. I can relate so much to all of this. I've never commented on a TH-cam video before but I had to say thanks so much for sharing!
Same here, only it’s Bachelors, with about half of the stuff for my masters somehow already done… (don’t ask me how I did that, I think it’s been by accident)
Hey man! Really liking your vids! I'm 27 and undiagnosed but I am indeed resonating with 95% of the things you say!
Very proud of what you have accomplished with the channel and your academics m8
Wow! You articulated my life so eloquently.
Thank you for this video, it felt like a perfect description of my life.