I lost my mum at 19 to a stroke. I found her laying there and she couldn’t even speak. Not one word. I am 26 now and I still am grieving. This video is what I would have loved back then. Even though the cause was different. Losing your mum when you are young is so devastating and affects your life in ways no one else can imagine unless they go through it. You have handled yourself so amazingly throughout this video. I am so proud of you for how you have spoke. You are such an inspiration to everyone and your mum would be so very proud of you for this. Xxxxx
When my mum was 10 years old she lost her mum to cancer. I never got to meet my grandma. My mum tells me things that she can remember about her all the time. Watching this makes me think how confused my mum must have been at just 10 years old not knowing much about cancer or what was going on. My mum has managed to cope with it as it has almost been 40 years now since her death. Some days she gets upset and wishes she has her mum to talk to. We say white feathers are her and when one falls we know she is there with us. I know she would be proud of what my mum has achieved today and I know she is always watching over us xxx
Elle, you’ve handled this with such poise and grace, it’s truly admirable. I’m blown away with how well you’ve spoken and all the thought you’ve put into this video and your mum’s beautiful tribute. I can only imagine how hard it’s been to be consumed by this experience for so long and to have your mum pass and have the world around you continue and need to find your way through it all. Surreal. You’re so brave and although it’s a devastating loss the growth that you will have from this will be huge. This adds layers to your soul and you’ll be an even more compassionate and empathetic person. Truly sorry you and Katy are going through such a tough time and I hope your mum is filled with the lightness that no doubt comes from when we leave our sick physical bodies. May she rest peacefully xx
I lost my mum when I was 27 years old, I remember coming home from the hospital and thinking I can’t believe she’s left this world and the world is still going without her in it... such a strange feeling. It’s true what people say you never get over it but you learn to live with the grief and ways of coping. Stay strong, you will have good and bad days but it does get easier 💕
I am a palliative care nurse in Bristol. This has really helped me see things from a family perspective as often we can get stuck in the clinical side of things. Thank you Elle for making this video, despite how much you are hurting xx
I couldn’t imagine losing my mum, I have a life we’re things go wrong quite a lot from family drama etc but my mum is always the glue that keeps things together. I honestly couldn’t cope without her, the video prior to this was completely beautiful, and the strength your showing filming this is really admirable.. stay strong 💕💕
LA Vickers what a ridiculous and insensitive comment, she isn’t doing this simply to get the money in fact I’m sure that’s one of the last things on her mind. For many people, and Ellie herself, this video will be hugely helpful in dealing with grief or loss by allowing people to realise grief is a normal process and people aren’t alone in feeling it. Allow Ellie to share her emotions in any way or platform she feels it can either benefit herself or others. Ever heard of the saying “If you have nothing nice to say just don’t say it at all”? Maybe you could benefit from it 🙄
@@lavickers2852 not really because u are misunderstanding the saying. When people say it, they don't literally mean you should only say something nice. It means if all u have to say about something is unwarranted negativity then it's better to keep it to yourself
I lost my mum to a brain tumour in July 2019, this video has been a rollercoaster of emotions, thank you soo much for making it, I didn’t know I needed it until I finished it. Love to you and your family 💖
This poor girl still puts a smile on her face when she feels like the whole world has fallen onto her. This proves how strong she is. I’m so proud. So sad anyone has to go through this xxxx
I’m in the incredibly fortunate position where I haven’t lost any of my immediate family and yet I was still somehow able to gain a sense comfort from your video. I have never seen someone speak so candidly, articulately and sincerely about their experience coping with the loss of a loved one and the subsequent grieving process and although I can’t directly relate, I’m sure this will resonate with many other viewers. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your mum and I wish you and your family all the best at this difficult time x
I lost my beautiful mum in October 2019 to a long battle with cancer quite similar to your own mum’s journey. No one will ever understand the pain of loosing your mum, especially at this age- and how alone it can make you feel. I’ve been searching for a video like this for years. You’ve done your job by helping someone feel less alone. Thank you❤️
@@melissawalker4163 thank you and I hope the same for you also. Just talking and listening to others who have had this happen also makes me remember I'm not the only person who has dealt with this pain and it helps to not feel so alone.
My respect goes out to all the mums who: . Lost a child . Lost their mum . Couldn't be with us . Played the dad's role . Struggled to become a mum . Got seperate from the child that they cared for Happy mothers day to all the amazing mums❤
I lost my mum when I was 16, I’m now 19. Thank you so much for making this video, you’ve been able to articulate how I’ve felt for almost the past 3 years. Ive watched this video with my boyfriend and it’s really helped him understand how and what I’m going through and me to communicate how I feel about being without my mum to my boyfriend. I 100% agree with the small little milestones such as eating cereal or dumb stuff like doing the first food shop without her. I dread the big milestones like getting married and having children without her but like you said, we are going to get through it. I’m sending so much love your way and I hope these videos are helping you to grieve and somewhat heal x
I lost my mom when I was 26. She passed away after 28 months of a courageous battle with Ovarian Cancer. To lose a mother is something that you know will happen someday , but to lose them too early feels like some type of punishment. It has taken me almost 10 years to get to where I am today , and to all of you in the comments just starting this journey or to you Elle I send all my love and my heart and prayers. It is so important to know you are not alone and that everything you feel is normal and you need to feel it. Bridget Ann Charlton was my mother , the most beautiful and special woman. The softest hands, the most beautiful smile and my favourite laugh in the world. She was the person I would talk to for hours and she was always there when I needed her. Happy mother's day to all of those who's mothers are in heaven , hoping they are all there with nothing but goodness around them. Elle you are so special for sharing with everyone and your mother would be so proud of you.
Hi I came across this as I am 26 now and mum has terminal ovarian cancer I also lost my dad last year to same illness..it’s a difficult and lonely journey and you really don’t want to hear anything from anyone unless they’ve gone through the same thing...but know there is beauty in human strength and learning to move on and adapt. I’m a completely different person with a different outlook on life now. Btw you are brave and amazing💜
I lost my mum 7 years ago (age 15) and this video was extremely difficult to watch as it was so relatable. You're so brave Elle ❤️ it's nice reading the comments and knowing we're not alone. Thank you xx
I lost my Dad when I was 15.. two days before my GCSE’s started. That happened in 2009.... now it’s 2020, 11 years this week on the 15th and I STILL get caught my a song, a memory, a feeling that I suddenly get upset. I never grieve by continually thinking of him but there will always be times it catches you off guard. The worst is feeling guilty for not thinking about them for a while but the memories are the most precious things. I appreciate my mam a gazillion times more (although she’s always been my best friend) and the strength she had during my dads diagnosis/when he went. Sending you SO much love. You’ll never forget her and you’ll love her forever, as she will you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I lost my Dad on the 23rd of March 2019, from cancer. The cancer spread to his brain and within a month he was gone. By far the hardest thing i’ve ever had to go through. Our way of dealing with it was to laugh and joke about it, my dad was so strong and didn’t want anything to ruin the rest of his life. He always told me that everything would be ok. Its heartbreaking, but believe me when I say, it does get easier. You cry a little less each day. But you never forget. I still have alot of anger that he was taken from us, i still talk to him and ask for his advice, the pain never goes away, you just learn to live with it. Sending you massive hugs! ❤️
Darling Elle - you are one of the classiest, most eloquent and genuine women on TH-cam. I don’t buy into the whole ‘influencer’ thing and you most certainly don’t fit into that box. This video is singlehandedly one of the most brave and selfless things anybody has ever put on this platform. You beautiful, beautiful soul. I am so very sorry for your loss and I really hope grief shows you a little kindness as time moves on. This video will have helped people more than you even realise xx
This has bought a tear to my eye, I saw she was pregnant before watching this vid because I’m new here and wondered about here mum, I’m so happy she’s pregnant and doing well💕
Elle, the way you talk is so eloquent and beautiful. You really touched my heart. Words can’t describe how amazing and strong and brave you are. Sending you so so so so much love ❤️
You always “angel” us but you’re the angel! Sending you the biggest hug and prayers as you continue to deal with the loss of your mother. I truly believe she’s looking down at you and smiling 💕
My dad was killed in a accident just before Christmas last year and I’m still dealing with a lot of hard moments on a day to day basis and I found this video very comforting to watch, thank you
PRAYING FOR YOU. I DON'T KNOW IF YOU ARE A BELIEVER IN OUR BEAUTIFUL FATHER YESHUA(JESUS) BUT BELIEVING IN OUR CREATOR HELPS YOU INCREDIBLY . I HOPE YOUR FATHER WAS A CHRISTIAN AND YOU AS WELL, SO THAT ONE DAY YOU CAN MEET AGAIN. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
I know how painful it can be to lose a parent coz I lost my mom about one and a half year ago too. Be strong and do your best in life to make him proud!
I remember this video being uploaded and not having the balls to watch it. My dad was then diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and I went through the hardest 9 months of my life and experienced all of this. My dad took his final breath on 28/03/2021. It’s taken me until today to sit down and watch this video. Thank you Elle. I needed this so much. Xx
Cried pretty much the whole way though. My mum is my absolute life and dont know what I would do it where I would be without her. You are so so strong ❤ I know we all say that to people but a mum is an unconditional bond and its heart breaking. Thank you for sharing. Thank you opening up and thank you for just being you. 💕💕 love from an angel gal
You are one brave beautiful woman. You have stayed so strong throughout this whole process. Mama raised a strong woman and you and Katie are part of her legacy. May she rest in perfect peace ❤️
This is so hard to watch, I lost my grandad on the 3rd December 2019, he was diagnosed with COPD in 2015. He was slowly deteriorating, he couldn't walk, he had his bed in the living room cos he couldn't walk far, he was always in and out of hospital.. but I never thought I was gunna lose him. He also had a catheter attached as he couldn't walk to the toilet. He went into hospital on the 24th November, this is when they found out about his cancer, he had lung cancer, a collapsed lung and COPD. On the 26th November, we found out that he only had days to live. He sadly passed on the 3rd December, holding my nans hand. On the 14th Feb 2020, it was my grandads birthday, we had a little party to remember him by, my nan was singing and dancing crying and laughing. She was a mixed of emotions, she missed her husband but she loved her family too. We sadly found my nan on the 15th Feb 2020 in the morning passed away... This was a major shock to us all, as we saw her the night before and she was fine where as with my grandad we had time with him, with my nan we really didn't. We found out that she passed away from heart disease but she didn't know. Us as a family use 'she died of a broken heart' Her and my grandad was together for 46 years But now they are back together.. Keep strong Elle, you have a massive support system and it helps alot! Xx
Wow I completely understand what you are going through! I felt like I was reading my own life story! I lost my nan in January just like your grandad she had COPD and as you said we watched her deteriorate so quickly, she wouldn’t move out of bed, she lost so much weight, couldn’t walk anywhere it was so hard watching her like this and knowing there was nothing you could do about it. I then called a ambulance the one day as she was really really poorly she showed signs of being okay and then not okay but overall I did think she would get better and soon come home. She then collapsed and was having seizers only for us to find out the day she died she had suspected lung cancer and the cancer had spread to her brain and this was causing the seizers. It all still feels so surreal my deepest sympathy goes out to you and I for one understand completely how overwhelming and surreal this all feels. I just only hope within time the pain of the grief fades as it’s so hard to deal with.
I lost my dad in a car crash incident when I was 4 years old... its so unbelievably hard to deal with grief, I've forever found it hard to speak about, but also found that speaking actually helps too.. for me what breaks my heart is that I never got the chance to share memories with my dad as he was only in my life for a short 4 years before he was taken away, but I can be forever thankful that I have precious videos and photos to remind me of what an amazing man he was♥️ You are so incredibly strong Elle and your mum will be so so proud of you, this video is really admirable, you are such an inspiration♥️
Dear ellie I'm so sorry for your loss of your dad just know that he loves you very much and wants you you to be happy I also lost my day his name was Kevin he died from cancer stay safe you are not alone 💜
My mum was called Debra Jane as well💙I lost my mum when I was 19. Nearly 4 years ago, the pain hasn't decreased at all it's just the way I cope and go throughout my life that somehow heightens. My mums passing was short and traumatic but it still doesn't prepare you for the loss of your best friend. Thankyou for this story Ellie, and for being real and open about it. May God bless you and your family to be💖❣
This has helped so much. Its been 8 years since I lost my mother (who is also called Deborah Jane!) from MS when I was 10. Wishing you and your family the world - you are so strong to be talking about this so openly.
Sending Elle and anyone who has lost a loved one a massive cuddle! Life can seem so cruel but it is also so beautiful for letting us share it with the ones we love. Sending love and strength!💓
U should be proud, your mum raised such beautiful girls inside and out. You have the most beautiful memories, how lucky are you to have a mother like that. I pray God grant your mum the highest rank in heaven. No doubt that's where she is, watching you both with pride. Sending lots of love. U will get thur this, there is no such thing as U WON'T!!! X
This was so difficult to watch😭I lost my dad to cancer when I was a child and last year my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. This video was really helpful tho and although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone it does help to see that other people have gone through similar situations. Thank you for being so brave and posting this ❤️
I'm so sorry for your dad's loss 💕 I'm sending my best wishes wishes to you and your mum. I hope your mum can battle cancer and please stay strong for her. Lots of love x
Just when we thought we couldn’t love Elle anymore than we did. I needed this. My dad passed away 5 years ago and I’ve always struggled with the fact I didn’t ‘grieve’ and just seemed to move on so easily afterwards. Hearing this, I really feel like I did my grieving whilst he was still alive and once he had passed, it was more a relief, I can finally stop beating myself up for feeling that way. This video will reach out and touch so many people and honestly, through the last 5 years this is the only time I feel like someone actually gets it! Well done Elle, you’ve been amazing throughout this journey! We’re all here for you!
I lost my daddy 2 n a half years ago n the pain I'm feeling still makes it feel like it was yesterday u never accept it life is never the same all u can do is try to keep going n to try n stay strong sending u hugs 💖
I’m 21 and my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer 2 weeks ago. I’ve been watching your videos for years. I was afraid to watch this video but I can now say that it’s actually so reassuring. I’m only at the beginning of this battle but am looking to you for guidance. Thank you Elle for sharing your story and showing me that there can still be love and joy even in the darkest of times.
Greif really is a life long thing, I lost my mum when I was 13 that was nearly 11 years ago now, yet I still cry and think about her all the time! Stay strong and just know your mum is always there even when you think she isn't 💕💕
I also lost my grandmother (who raised me) when i was 13. She was only 59, and this was in 2012. It’s such a hard age to loose someone tbh What made it worse is my great grandmother (her mom) lived 4 years after her, so we had each other but i think loosing a child is even worse I definitely think of her often and cry a lot to this day. I don’t get upset at holidays, it’s little things Like the summer before she died, we watched big brother. She would make us popcorn, soda even with how sick she was.. And this year, the winner of that season came back.. i had a full on breakdown as i no longer watch the show, but an ad popped up and i hadn’t seen his face since we watched the show together and i sobbed for a while after It does get easier but it never fully goes away
I lost my Auntie 6 days ago to an 8 year battle of cancer. She had it in three areas then got rid of it all and then it hit harder, she was given two years to live in 2015 but got through another 5 years from then. She was due to stay at her dads on morphine on monday just to keep her comfortable but sadly as they were getting her ready to leave hospital she passed. i’ve been following this story not only because i watch your normal videos but because i knew the time was coming for my auntie too.. your whole aspect and way of getting through it has really helped me do the same. thank you❤️
Each and every one of you in the comments who has lost someone I’m sending all my love and bravery to you as I couldn’t even imagine going through something so horrendous but being so brave whilst doing it . You should all be proud of yourself and you Elle . We’re all here supporting , every step of the way ❤️❤️
No words could possibly do yours and yours mums strength, bravery and courage any justice. You are both incredibly beautiful souls. I hope that one day you can look at yourself through the eyes of your mum and see what a truly beautiful reflection of her you are ❤️Xxxx
Oh Elle. I know everyone is telling you you’re so brave but my admiration for you is sky high. You truly are an incredibly brave amazing woman. Crying and sharing your vulnerability doesn’t make you any less brave but the way you respected your mums choices throughout her story and the dignity and love you carried on with is truly brave and so strong. My heart broke watching this for you, I’m sorry you had to go through it. I’m sorry anyone has too. Out of a truly heart breaking story you’ve still found some light sharing your story and helping so many people who are going through something similar. Your mum must be incredibly proud of you and your sister. You are inspiring to us all. Love you Elle
baba BZNZ what she’s done is incredibly brave of her, she’s sharing with her audience her story in losing her mother which can help so many people going through the same thing. Have some respect man
i haven’t personally ever had to deal with loss, nor can i imagine what you’re going through. but, i can understand how this video can help others going through similar situations. im sending you and katie so much love and positivity. you’re incredibly strong and never ever alone 🤍
I’m losing my mum right now, I feel so alone and so angry. I’ve been told anger is normal. My mum now has the syringe driver too. Thank you for putting this video up, just knowing someone has gone through this and knowing I’m not alone is a big help. Thank you and I have to say I really admire what you’re doing, I’m sending you lots of love and hugs. Take care xx
I lost my mum when I was 12, i'm now 16 and I still miss her more and more each day! when my mum passed away I needed a video like this so I knew I wasn't alone, so this really helped! thank you and I hope you're okay xx
So sorry for your loss. I lost my mom about one n half yrs ago.. I m still struggling and crying every other night. I m still struggling to find a way to cope with this pain n looking for answers how to live without my mom.
Chris Tan hi, I’m so sorry also for your loss, you’ll never be over the death of someone special, but just keep doing you! When you ever get upset just think about how happy and proud she is of you, and everything you do, do it even better just for your mum!
@@poppyrose7969 hi poppy thanks for the comforting words. Can I ask you how you fight this pain of losing your mom at such a young age. How long has this been for you till today? You are so strong and I pray your mom will always protect you from above. Till this day some nights I will burst into tears. Nothing can be more painful for me than losing a mother. Stay strong Poppy Rose. And thanks for sharing.. Truly appreciate
I lost my dad last year and the pain I felt that day I never thought I’d ever feel heartache that much. He will always be in my heart and my thoughts all the time. My mum passed away with cancer 12 years ago so both my parent are my angels 👼
I know how hard this must be for you, as I said before I was 23 and I lost my mom unexpectedly she was here one day healthy next day it was the hardest time of my life, I was angry at everyone, my son was just a couple months oldand I didn't want my mother-in-law to give me any advice since my mother couldn't. I was working in emergency room and found it so hard to have any compassion for people coming in on losing a relative. I went through so much anger anger and pain. My advice to you would be just talked about her when you're around other people just like she was still here keep her memory alive
🦋 Although you can not hear her voice or see her smile no more, your mother walks beside you still just as she did before. She listens to your stories and she wipes away your tears, she wraps her arms around you and she understands your fears. It’s just she isn’t visible to see with human eye, but talk to her in silence and her spirit will reply. You’ll feel the love she has for you, you’ll hear her in your heart, she’s left her human body but your souls will never part. . . . . . . . Really sorry for the loss of your mother. It truly shows how amazing your mother was as she has raised such beautiful daughters with so much strength. I know you would say your mum is your hero but honestly you was put on this planet to be your mums hero. All my love 🌸💜
Sorry for your loss...it's true grief stays with you forever. I lost my dad when I was 12..it doesn't just go away after a short period of time. I still have periods of crying even after nearly 25 years I think about him most days. He wasn't here at my wedding, grandkids and seeing them growing up..etc it's hard Thinking of you... don't you feel any guilt she'll always be there in your memories
I lost my mum last year in March at the age of 54 due to multiple tumour cancer- she fell ill on a Monday night, and rapidly deteriorated then died on the Saturday. It all happened so quickly. It will always stick with you (I still occasionally have nightmare now that she's in the hospital and I have to bring a cure to her but I get stuck and don't make it in time) . It does get easier with time, you learn to discuss the good memories with happiness and not sadness. Myself and my younger sister can reminisce now about our family memories without tears. The first Christmas without her was tough but we kept up our usual family traditions. It'll be tough without her with the big milestones such as marriage, having kids etc. There are a lot of people out there who lost parents prematurely, we all get through it one way or another
Thank you for telling us this very sad story and being so honest. I lost my mum when I was 18 (I’m 52 now). I couldn’t sit with her for her last hours (my brothers and sisters and my dear dad did) and I do regret that. You are a very brave young lady as was your beautiful dear mum. Xxxxxxx. I kno you will 100% but look after Katie. I send you both lots of love. Xxxx.
I sometimes regret not being there in my Granda's last moments but part of me is glad because I don't think I could've coped with replaying that moment over in my head. You were only 18, she would've known how much you adored her and I'm sure she would hate you to regret that. Sending love to you, I'm sure she's so proud of the woman you are
Elle you are such a strong person 💛 you’re being so brave, honest and raw telling us all your story of losing your mum 🥺 I lost my grandmother in January 2019 very suddenly and I miss her with all my heart every single day! She always treated me like her very own daughter we were so close and I never imagined the day I’d have to live with out her 🥺 there were days when I thought I’d never be happy again but it’s strange how true it is that time really does help! you slowly learn to live with this new reality and hold on to the memory of them so dearly, looking forward to the day when we are hopefully reunited in our own time 💛 I truly believe we never fully lose the people we love, they are always with us throughout our lives just like your mum is with you every single day 💗 she’d be so proud of you, just as we are too!! ❤️ x
@@lavickers2852 Are you serious? You don't feel sympathy because she's simultaneously doing her job AND sharing her story? I take it you don't feel sorry for people who have to work while they're grieving either, no?
Elle Darby we love you, you strong admirable woman. I truly believe she waited to have one last Mother's Day with you before passing on. You will forever treasure that last conversation with her. 🤍
I seriously cried when she start talking about her last convo with her mom . Elle your such s strong girl seriously I never thought from all those amazing videos you have posted on your channel that you was going thru such a difficult time . You always tried to put a smile on your face seriously I haven’t seen such a strong girl . Love you and stay strong ❤️🥺
I share your pain. Stay strong coz your mom wants you to move on and live your life to the fullest. Remember you are not alone. I lost my mom to cancer too.
This was so inspiring to watch. I lost my grandad to cancer, he was a huge part of my life and watching him pass was the hardest thing ever so watching you tell your story was so brave! Sending the biggest virtual hug your way ❤️
I’ve never felt like I’m having a one - to - one chat with a TH-camr more than I did through this video 💕 I lost both of my grandads to cancer in the space of 5 months . One died very suddenly in one day and no one saw it coming and my other one went through it very slowly until he was in a hospice and I was there when he took his last breath 💕
Only 30s in and I already feel like I’m going to tear up 🥺 I can’t even begin to imagine how you have found the strength within you to do this right now, I can see in your eyes the pure pain you are feeling and how vulnerable you letting yourself be💔 thank you for helping so many people by putting your pain out there & showing people it’s okay not to be okay. I love you angel 😇❤️
Just to be so selfless & think of helping other people right now just shows the type of woman you are. A woman your Mum I'm sure was so proud of & will be looking down on so proud right now. The strength you have shown is just inspirational. Sending lots of love to you & your family xx
Elle, I haven’t watched this video because I lost my mum just under three months ago and I know it’d be too hard for me, but I just wanted to say that you’re not alone. My mum was my best friend and the only person I truly ever loved, and I won’t lie, it’s been awful and isn’t getting any easier. Aside from your world being turned upside down you’ll probably learn that a lot of people you called friends or family aren’t the people you thought they were. You’ll see a side of yourself you never thought was there. You’ll have days where you want to be around people all the time and days where anyone near you makes you want to scream. It’s shit, and I’m not going to sit here and pretend it’s all sunshine and rainbows again after a few weeks. However, having people to talk to is so important. I know you have Con and your sisters but sometimes it’s a hell of a lot easier to have a rant to someone who isn’t so emotionally involved in the situation. It’s one of the things that I couldn’t have lived without recently. I know I’m just a stranger on the internet, but please reach out if you come across this comment and just want to chat to someone who knows how you’re feeling. My Twitter or Insta is glassbeats, I’m 21 and I’m called Charlotte. Sending you all of my love Angel x
Bless you and I understand everything you said because I went through it too. Take your time to deal with it. You'll never get over it but you will learn to live with it IN YOUR OWN TIME. Sending love to you and your family xxx
Couldn't relate to you more. I am also 21, my mum fell asleep yesterday following a four and a half year journey of ovarian cancer. It's so so tough isn't it, especially when you're closer to your mum than anyone can imagine. You're ready xx
@@oliviagrace5108 Just wanted to send love to you, I'm 24 and my mum is down to the final days of her 3 and a half year ovarian cancer battle just now and I feel just so sad. Ovarian cancer is so aggressive and her deterioration has happened so quickly that how she was even 3 weeks ago feels a lifetime ago now, it truly feels like I've stepped into a parallel universe. I don't know what I can offer or what to say but your comment resonated so strongly with me and I just wanted to send love xxx
Elle you are honestly so strong ❤️ I lost my dad last July due to a long fighting battle with depression and it honestly broke me and I lost myself completely! I know everybody says this, but it will get better I have just accepted that he has gone, and it takes time. Your have your good days and your bad days. And the firsts are honestly the worst but it does get better. It’s so important to talk. You have honestly gone through such a journey and you make all us angels so proud of you ❤️ lots of love xx
I don’t think you realise how much of an inspiration you are, You are such a brave beautiful soul, your mum will be so proud of you, you’re helping so many people. Never forget your mum will always be with you, sending you all my love hunny, you should be so proud of yourself ❤️
I can’t believe people are disliking this video... This is the saddest video I’ve ever watched I am in tears! Elle has the biggest heart and her mum will be so proud of her! I can’t even begin to imagine how hard this was to deal with, the loss and the build up, being told she has this long left but then she makes it past it, how scary that must feel. We’re all sending love to you and your family💞 (p.s she’s still looking absolutely beautiful)
I literally want to give you the biggest hug ❤️ this is so so brave! I am deeply so so sorry for you loss. Sending you all the love and positivity. Xxx
This is amazing can't imagine how hard this must've been! I lost my Dad two years ago really unexpectedly after he fell down the stairs, there was nothing like this about and even though this is a different circumstances this makes me feel like I'm not alone and there are people who understand how I feel. Elle you're helping so many people by doing this, your Mum would be so so proud! You are a real life angel 💛😇xxx
I couldn’t stop crying. You’re amazing and brave . I had to go through the same feeling when my mum died on 25 December. It was like I lost everything . You have to be strong for your sister and your boyfriend. Everyone is there for you beautiful. Your mum is always with you . She will protect and love you and your sister forever ❤️❤️🥺
I lost my mom in 2015. It’s 5 years this years in July. She died 6 days before her 55th birthday. I totally relate to everything you have said Elle. My mom died of cervical cancer. Virtual hugs coming your way lovely. I’m so glad I have my fiancé. He’s my rock. Keep strong Elle. Your mom is always with you x
I lost my mum last night to cancer, she was diagnosed 2 months ago, that's all the time we got with her :( I am now taking full-time care of her 8 year old daughter/my sister and I am so scared to do this without her. Your video has given me a bit of comfort, thank you for sharing your story x
Your mum was right, you were being so brave. Such a strong beautiful girl. You did everything you possibly could do to make your mum's last years what she wished for. You should be extremely proud of yourself for that for the rest of your life
Really sorry for your loss of your mum and thank you for being brave enough to discuss this on a public platform. I lost my mum last year during the pandemic and couldn't attend her funeral or get back home at all. It's such a hard thing to lose a parent. Sending you lots of love.
It's taken me nearly a year to pluck up the courage to watch this. I've lost people suddenly and to long term illness, (cancer, fatal heart attacks, brain tumours, demensure, suicide etc) no loss is easy. But I think with long term illness you get a chance to cherish them and prepare yourself as much as you can for the end. It doesnt stop the grief, nothing does. God be be with you and your family, your mum will always be with you. My cousin died 12 years ago and I still talk to him nearly everyday, he was 38. His Son who was 17 at the time, got married yesterday, I know he was there cheering him on.
i have a stronger relationship with my stepmom rather than my mum. my stepmom has an extremely rare condition with only 6 people in the world have. She’s trying to live her life but it is slowly getting worse. i will never forget the time when she had a seizure infront of me. one minute she was showing me the shopping the next minute i was shouting my dad to call an ambulance. i’m taking every time i spend with her the best i can make it because i never know when that last time is going to be. be strong lovely, she’s looking over you and she’s very proud of you 💓xx
i love that connor is so good with you and i’m so happy you have such a good support system around you. You are strong and incredible to be doing this. We are all proud of you & katie xxx
Oh, Elle😫 My heart bleeds for you angel. I lost my mum in July, and then my Dad just 3 weeks before your Mum passed. It hurts so much, but we will get through this. As you said, grief comes over me now and again, but I know they are with me. I turned 21 at the end of March, and the fact that I didn't have my Mum here to celebrate was awful. I'm sending you all the love xxx
i cried with you throughout this video, i lost my mother back in 2018 i was twelve/ thirteen when my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, she passed away when i was fourteen and even though i have 3 older sister we all dealt with it differently and i felt so alone, now im eighteen and their hasn't been a day i don't think about her and watching this video gave me sense of comfort so thank you for sharing something so difficult and personal to help others
It gets easier with time......never get over it and move on and all the support in the world cant help you....its time, it all gets easier with time. My advise, just enjoy the little things in life and that a simple smile can make you feel better. My dad didnt pass away from cancer but i lost him when i was 17. Suddenly and he was my rock, he was my best friend and 7 years later, i find myself talking to him...even if he is not here, telling him what is going Off and it helps. You are not alone either but thank you for making me not feel alone.
Elle, you should be so proud of yourself. I'm really lucky that I've gotten to 25 and have never had to deal with the loss of someone close to me (touch wood) but I hope that when the time comes I will be able to carry myself the way you have. I know your mum will be so proud of you. I hope Katy is doing as well as she can possibly be at this time. I'm thinking of you both xx
I lost my dad suddenly when I was 13. Still think about him every day 12 years later and definitely felt alone as a child losing a parent. Im really sorry for your loss xx Thanks for making this video xx
Elle Darby, you are a true angel. I really admired how you explained grief. Everyone grieves different and it is something that sticks with us. The memories and new adventures we wish they could be right along with us in the moment is painful. It’s normal to experience this, but just know you are so strong and so brave to tell your journey. Thank you for it all. 💞
Thank you for sharing this, showing us that people can be so selfless, I think I need to remember its not about me, it’s about them, my mum had to give all her time to my nan before she died and I didn’t understand or know how hard it would of been. You are right always try to make it light hearted when you can!
My dad was diagnosed with a grade 4 brain tumour scattered all over his brain, so our journeys have been pretty similar from the point of grade 4 diagnosis. He passed away 18 months after diagnosis on 2nd January 2020 when I was 15, my sister was 12 and my brother was only 8. We “celebrated” his 45th birthday on the 25th of July. There are so many things I could say and agree with but this comment would be too long. All I can say is that I am so so glad that I came across this video ❤️❤️ thank you so so so so so much for sharing xxxx
I lost my mum at the ages off 17 , 7 years ago she was my best friend and she had it in a few areas and then traveled to her brain. I watched her take her last breathe and Ino exactly what your going through.. the pain never goes but you live your life go deal with it.😢 stay strong Ino how hard it is.❤️xxxxxxx
The bravery and courage you radiate is beyond inspiring. My fiancé and I are also experiencing this, his mum was diagnosed with a brain tumour the size of a grapefruit Boxing Day 2014, also on the same part of her brain, causing her to loose her memory, speach, causing her to be incontinent, she had surgery to remove the tumour, of which they thought was successful.. only to discover on her annually review it had came back, even now to this day she is living with her brain tumour.. every day we pray it doesn’t grow. This video is the strength and shoulder we all needed back then. You are so inspirational and I am so great full for you. Thank you xo
You are one of the kindest people, you are literally like a therapist, you have made everything so much better for me, and have helped me through some of my darkest times. Your mum and everyone around you will forever be proud of you and the most special person you have become. Thank you for just being you! xx
I've currently got someone very close to me and who I see everyday, battle with cancer and I spent almost my entire christmas and new year period this year in and out of hospital when she was having her chemotherapy and radiotherapy treatments. I never shared any of that online and it was a real personal struggle, i really get the *need* to find somebody to relate to. It's so incredible scary seeing how fast a person can deteriorate and how quickly cancer can take hold. This video was incredible, youre so gracious and you've done your mum so so proud 💕🙏🦋
My nan who is one of the most important people in my life has a few weeks left to live...we only found out she had cancer a few days ago, and i live 5 hours away. She really doesent want me to visit because of corona, she saidit would give her alot more to worry about
Naomi, I am so so sorry to hear you are going through this. I have watched your videos for a while and just wanted to say I will keep you in my thoughts. Sending you loads of love ❤️ Always here if you need someone to chat to xx
From someone who lost their mum age 10 all I can say is thank you for this video and how honest your Instagram stories have been❤️ I’m 24 now and still struggle with it, but these vids help me along ❤️❤️
I lost my mother, my best friend to spreaded ovary cancer when she was only 46... I was 18 when se slept away. The saddest thing is that her death is so final. Sometimes I just feel like I want to die too, so I wouldnt have to live without her. I have to try to keep on living for my siblibgs, my little sister is just 10 years old and she leans towards me. Moms death has also changed dad, sometimes I am scared of him if he might yell, I think that is why my sister leans to me instead of him. It is really hard to live cause mum was the glue to our whole family... She wasn’t just a mom. She was my best friend, literally. Someone who always listened, always made me feel safe and loved. Without her love life just feels empty.
This breaks my heart. I feel beyond sorry for you💔.I know I am not in the position to say that because I luckily can’t relate to you but it will get better and you will come to a point where you will truly love life again. Don’t give up. She will always watch over you and your family.
August 2019 i lost my gran to a very short 12 month cancer battle that got to her brain. I cannot begin to explain how much this video brought me comfort and such a release of emotion that has given me strength that im not alone. Elle just like you I’d searched youtube to find this very video... cancer might of taken my family, but it will never take my happiness... you hold so much strength and will have your mum right with you. They tell us this in their last few days, and make sure we know they’re going to a better place. i know they’re by our side x
Thank you so much for making this video. I lost my mum last August after a 10 year battle with bone cancer, she was diagnosed when I was 14. I can relate to so many things you went through, particularly not really acknowledging properly what was going on and making jokes. Also having to deal with changing roles and becoming the carer. This video has allowed me to fully confront what happened and let out some tears. Sending lots of love to you - so brave to make this video xxx
I lost my mum at 19 to a stroke. I found her laying there and she couldn’t even speak. Not one word. I am 26 now and I still am grieving. This video is what I would have loved back then. Even though the cause was different. Losing your mum when you are young is so devastating and affects your life in ways no one else can imagine unless they go through it.
You have handled yourself so amazingly throughout this video. I am so proud of you for how you have spoke. You are such an inspiration to everyone and your mum would be so very proud of you for this.
Xxxxx
❤️❤️❤️
C. C.
When my mum was 10 years old she lost her mum to cancer. I never got to meet my grandma. My mum tells me things that she can remember about her all the time. Watching this makes me think how confused my mum must have been at just 10 years old not knowing much about cancer or what was going on. My mum has managed to cope with it as it has almost been 40 years now since her death. Some days she gets upset and wishes she has her mum to talk to. We say white feathers are her and when one falls we know she is there with us. I know she would be proud of what my mum has achieved today and I know she is always watching over us xxx
Same
Elle, you’ve handled this with such poise and grace, it’s truly admirable. I’m blown away with how well you’ve spoken and all the thought you’ve put into this video and your mum’s beautiful tribute.
I can only imagine how hard it’s been to be consumed by this experience for so long and to have your mum pass and have the world around you continue and need to find your way through it all. Surreal. You’re so brave and although it’s a devastating loss the growth that you will have from this will be huge. This adds layers to your soul and you’ll be an even more compassionate and empathetic person. Truly sorry you and Katy are going through such a tough time and I hope your mum is filled with the lightness that no doubt comes from when we leave our sick physical bodies. May she rest peacefully xx
I lost my mum when I was 27 years old, I remember coming home from the hospital and thinking I can’t believe she’s left this world and the world is still going without her in it... such a strange feeling. It’s true what people say you never get over it but you learn to live with the grief and ways of coping. Stay strong, you will have good and bad days but it does get easier 💕
I am a palliative care nurse in Bristol. This has really helped me see things from a family perspective as often we can get stuck in the clinical side of things. Thank you Elle for making this video, despite how much you are hurting xx
my mum passed away from leukaemia in Bristol x
I couldn’t imagine losing my mum, I have a life we’re things go wrong quite a lot from family drama etc but my mum is always the glue that keeps things together. I honestly couldn’t cope without her, the video prior to this was completely beautiful, and the strength your showing filming this is really admirable.. stay strong 💕💕
LA Vickers what a ridiculous and insensitive comment, she isn’t doing this simply to get the money in fact I’m sure that’s one of the last things on her mind. For many people, and Ellie herself, this video will be hugely helpful in dealing with grief or loss by allowing people to realise grief is a normal process and people aren’t alone in feeling it. Allow Ellie to share her emotions in any way or platform she feels it can either benefit herself or others. Ever heard of the saying “If you have nothing nice to say just don’t say it at all”? Maybe you could benefit from it 🙄
@@lavickers2852 Do you really think it's appropriate to be sending negativity to a woman grieving her mother?
Dude or dudet, not the time, there is never a time to say that s"""
@@lavickers2852 calling out cold murder isn't bad so nice try but no
@@lavickers2852 not really because u are misunderstanding the saying. When people say it, they don't literally mean you should only say something nice. It means if all u have to say about something is unwarranted negativity then it's better to keep it to yourself
I lost my mum to a brain tumour in July 2019, this video has been a rollercoaster of emotions, thank you soo much for making it, I didn’t know I needed it until I finished it. Love to you and your family 💖
lol
Sending lots of best wishes to you x
D1 what’s wrong with u
I’m sorry sweetheart xxxx
@@hannahogidi The original lol stands for lots of love I'm hoping that's what they mean.
This poor girl still puts a smile on her face when she feels like the whole world has fallen onto her. This proves how strong she is. I’m so proud. So sad anyone has to go through this xxxx
I’m in the incredibly fortunate position where I haven’t lost any of my immediate family and yet I was still somehow able to gain a sense comfort from your video. I have never seen someone speak so candidly, articulately and sincerely about their experience coping with the loss of a loved one and the subsequent grieving process and although I can’t directly relate, I’m sure this will resonate with many other viewers. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your mum and I wish you and your family all the best at this difficult time x
I lost my beautiful mum in October 2019 to a long battle with cancer quite similar to your own mum’s journey. No one will ever understand the pain of loosing your mum, especially at this age- and how alone it can make you feel. I’ve been searching for a video like this for years. You’ve done your job by helping someone feel less alone. Thank you❤️
So sorry for your loss 😢 I just lost my mum July 28th 2021 😭 I'm so loss without her 💔
I just lost mine yesterday... this is the WORST feeling I’ve ever had in my life
@@netterz3411 I'm so sorry for your loss 💔 may Father God bless you through this difficult time 🙏 😢. I loss mine July 28th 2021 😭
@@melissawalker4163 thank you and I hope the same for you also. Just talking and listening to others who have had this happen also makes me remember I'm not the only person who has dealt with this pain and it helps to not feel so alone.
@@netterz3411 i feel the same way. God Bless You 🙏
My respect goes out to all the mums who:
. Lost a child
. Lost their mum
. Couldn't be with us
. Played the dad's role
. Struggled to become a mum
. Got seperate from the child that they cared for
Happy mothers day to all the amazing mums❤
But Mother’s Day was ages ago???
@Ezi O’L and in Brazil🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷❤
My mom experienced all of those and she died of cancer 30th november this year. Im not looking forward to christmas tomorrow
@@kenblyberg341 I'm so sorry to hear that❤ Rn, my mum has Covid
you haven’t lost her permanently she is always with you 👑 she is so proud of you 💗 keep your head up it’s amazing how far you have come 🥺💞
Elle you are so strong honestly. You should be so proud of yourself for talking about this ♥️
Evie Chappell hi
I lost my mum when I was 16, I’m now 19. Thank you so much for making this video, you’ve been able to articulate how I’ve felt for almost the past 3 years. Ive watched this video with my boyfriend and it’s really helped him understand how and what I’m going through and me to communicate how I feel about being without my mum to my boyfriend. I 100% agree with the small little milestones such as eating cereal or dumb stuff like doing the first food shop without her. I dread the big milestones like getting married and having children without her but like you said, we are going to get through it. I’m sending so much love your way and I hope these videos are helping you to grieve and somewhat heal x
I lost my mom when I was 26. She passed away after 28 months of a courageous battle with Ovarian Cancer. To lose a mother is something that you know will happen someday , but to lose them too early feels like some type of punishment. It has taken me almost 10 years to get to where I am today , and to all of you in the comments just starting this journey or to you Elle I send all my love and my heart and prayers. It is so important to know you are not alone and that everything you feel is normal and you need to feel it. Bridget Ann Charlton was my mother , the most beautiful and special woman. The softest hands, the most beautiful smile and my favourite laugh in the world. She was the person I would talk to for hours and she was always there when I needed her. Happy mother's day to all of those who's mothers are in heaven , hoping they are all there with nothing but goodness around them. Elle you are so special for sharing with everyone and your mother would be so proud of you.
Hi I came across this as I am 26 now and mum has terminal ovarian cancer I also lost my dad last year to same illness..it’s a difficult and lonely journey and you really don’t want to hear anything from anyone unless they’ve gone through the same thing...but know there is beauty in human strength and learning to move on and adapt. I’m a completely different person with a different outlook on life now. Btw you are brave and amazing💜
I lost my mum 7 years ago (age 15) and this video was extremely difficult to watch as it was so relatable. You're so brave Elle ❤️ it's nice reading the comments and knowing we're not alone. Thank you xx
I lost my Dad when I was 15.. two days before my GCSE’s started. That happened in 2009.... now it’s 2020, 11 years this week on the 15th and I STILL get caught my a song, a memory, a feeling that I suddenly get upset. I never grieve by continually thinking of him but there will always be times it catches you off guard. The worst is feeling guilty for not thinking about them for a while but the memories are the most precious things. I appreciate my mam a gazillion times more (although she’s always been my best friend) and the strength she had during my dads diagnosis/when he went. Sending you SO much love. You’ll never forget her and you’ll love her forever, as she will you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Jay Walford I also lost my dad when I was 15, just before GCSEs. Your comment is so true ❤️ so difficult even years later. Sending love Xxx
I lost my Dad on the 23rd of March 2019, from cancer. The cancer spread to his brain and within a month he was gone. By far the hardest thing i’ve ever had to go through. Our way of dealing with it was to laugh and joke about it, my dad was so strong and didn’t want anything to ruin the rest of his life. He always told me that everything would be ok. Its heartbreaking, but believe me when I say, it does get easier. You cry a little less each day. But you never forget. I still have alot of anger that he was taken from us, i still talk to him and ask for his advice, the pain never goes away, you just learn to live with it. Sending you massive hugs! ❤️
Darling Elle - you are one of the classiest, most eloquent and genuine women on TH-cam. I don’t buy into the whole ‘influencer’ thing and you most certainly don’t fit into that box. This video is singlehandedly one of the most brave and selfless things anybody has ever put on this platform. You beautiful, beautiful soul. I am so very sorry for your loss and I really hope grief shows you a little kindness as time moves on. This video will have helped people more than you even realise xx
This has bought a tear to my eye, I saw she was pregnant before watching this vid because I’m new here and wondered about here mum, I’m so happy she’s pregnant and doing well💕
Elle, the way you talk is so eloquent and beautiful. You really touched my heart. Words can’t describe how amazing and strong and brave you are. Sending you so so so so much love ❤️
You’re so strong. You should be so proud of yourself. God knows everyone else is proud of you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
You always “angel” us but you’re the angel! Sending you the biggest hug and prayers as you continue to deal with the loss of your mother. I truly believe she’s looking down at you and smiling 💕
My dad was killed in a accident just before Christmas last year and I’m still dealing with a lot of hard moments on a day to day basis and I found this video very comforting to watch, thank you
So sorry for your loss :(( ❤❤❤
Courtney Cameron sorry for your loss 💜💜
PRAYING FOR YOU. I DON'T KNOW IF YOU ARE A BELIEVER IN OUR BEAUTIFUL FATHER YESHUA(JESUS) BUT BELIEVING IN OUR CREATOR HELPS YOU INCREDIBLY . I HOPE YOUR FATHER WAS A CHRISTIAN AND YOU AS WELL, SO THAT ONE DAY YOU CAN MEET AGAIN. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
I know how painful it can be
to lose a parent coz I lost my mom about one and a half year ago too. Be strong and do your best in life to make him proud!
My dad was murdered
I remember this video being uploaded and not having the balls to watch it. My dad was then diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and I went through the hardest 9 months of my life and experienced all of this. My dad took his final breath on 28/03/2021. It’s taken me until today to sit down and watch this video. Thank you Elle. I needed this so much. Xx
U just made a grown man cry reading your comment hope your ok 😪💜
@@proudtobeageordie2926 thank you so much, having up and down days but to be expected. I’m also a geordie so is nice to see another one here 👋 xx
@@laurenjones2216 u got this just take one day at a time :) geordies are the best 💜 xx
Cried pretty much the whole way though. My mum is my absolute life and dont know what I would do it where I would be without her. You are so so strong ❤ I know we all say that to people but a mum is an unconditional bond and its heart breaking. Thank you for sharing. Thank you opening up and thank you for just being you. 💕💕 love from an angel gal
You are one brave beautiful woman. You have stayed so strong throughout this whole process. Mama raised a strong woman and you and Katie are part of her legacy. May she rest in perfect peace ❤️
This is so hard to watch, I lost my grandad on the 3rd December 2019, he was diagnosed with COPD in 2015. He was slowly deteriorating, he couldn't walk, he had his bed in the living room cos he couldn't walk far, he was always in and out of hospital.. but I never thought I was gunna lose him. He also had a catheter attached as he couldn't walk to the toilet. He went into hospital on the 24th November, this is when they found out about his cancer, he had lung cancer, a collapsed lung and COPD. On the 26th November, we found out that he only had days to live. He sadly passed on the 3rd December, holding my nans hand.
On the 14th Feb 2020, it was my grandads birthday, we had a little party to remember him by, my nan was singing and dancing crying and laughing. She was a mixed of emotions, she missed her husband but she loved her family too.
We sadly found my nan on the 15th Feb 2020 in the morning passed away...
This was a major shock to us all, as we saw her the night before and she was fine where as with my grandad we had time with him, with my nan we really didn't.
We found out that she passed away from heart disease but she didn't know.
Us as a family use 'she died of a broken heart'
Her and my grandad was together for 46 years
But now they are back together..
Keep strong Elle, you have a massive support system and it helps alot! Xx
Jade Brueton 💗💗
Wow I completely understand what you are going through! I felt like I was reading my own life story! I lost my nan in January just like your grandad she had COPD and as you said we watched her deteriorate so quickly, she wouldn’t move out of bed, she lost so much weight, couldn’t walk anywhere it was so hard watching her like this and knowing there was nothing you could do about it. I then called a ambulance the one day as she was really really poorly she showed signs of being okay and then not okay but overall I did think she would get better and soon come home. She then collapsed and was having seizers only for us to find out the day she died she had suspected lung cancer and the cancer had spread to her brain and this was causing the seizers. It all still feels so surreal my deepest sympathy goes out to you and I for one understand completely how overwhelming and surreal this all feels. I just only hope within time the pain of the grief fades as it’s so hard to deal with.
Hopefully your okay
I lost my dad in a car crash incident when I was 4 years old... its so unbelievably hard to deal with grief, I've forever found it hard to speak about, but also found that speaking actually helps too.. for me what breaks my heart is that I never got the chance to share memories with my dad as he was only in my life for a short 4 years before he was taken away, but I can be forever thankful that I have precious videos and photos to remind me of what an amazing man he was♥️
You are so incredibly strong Elle and your mum will be so so proud of you, this video is really admirable, you are such an inspiration♥️
Dear ellie
I'm so sorry for your loss of your dad just know that he loves you very much and wants you you to be happy I also lost my day his name was Kevin he died from cancer stay safe you are not alone 💜
My mum was called Debra Jane as well💙I lost my mum when I was 19. Nearly 4 years ago, the pain hasn't decreased at all it's just the way I cope and go throughout my life that somehow heightens. My mums passing was short and traumatic but it still doesn't prepare you for the loss of your best friend. Thankyou for this story Ellie, and for being real and open about it. May God bless you and your family to be💖❣
This has helped so much. Its been 8 years since I lost my mother (who is also called Deborah Jane!) from MS when I was 10. Wishing you and your family the world - you are so strong to be talking about this so openly.
Sending Elle and anyone who has lost a loved one a massive cuddle! Life can seem so cruel but it is also so beautiful for letting us share it with the ones we love. Sending love and strength!💓
You told this heartbreaking story in such a beautiful way. I can’t imagine how hard this has been for you and Katie to go through. I am in bits x
U should be proud, your mum raised such beautiful girls inside and out. You have the most beautiful memories, how lucky are you to have a mother like that. I pray God grant your mum the highest rank in heaven. No doubt that's where she is, watching you both with pride. Sending lots of love. U will get thur this, there is no such thing as U WON'T!!! X
This video means the world to me I lost my mum 3 years ago now from Liver disease and I’ve never related so much to how someone felt thank you Elle❤
This was so difficult to watch😭I lost my dad to cancer when I was a child and last year my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. This video was really helpful tho and although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone it does help to see that other people have gone through similar situations. Thank you for being so brave and posting this ❤️
I'm so sorry for your dad's loss 💕 I'm sending my best wishes wishes to you and your mum. I hope your mum can battle cancer and please stay strong for her. Lots of love x
Ishrat Islam thankyou so much💞💞
@@meganrose1489 you're welcome ❤
Just when we thought we couldn’t love Elle anymore than we did.
I needed this. My dad passed away 5 years ago and I’ve always struggled with the fact I didn’t ‘grieve’ and just seemed to move on so easily afterwards. Hearing this, I really feel like I did my grieving whilst he was still alive and once he had passed, it was more a relief, I can finally stop beating myself up for feeling that way. This video will reach out and touch so many people and honestly, through the last 5 years this is the only time I feel like someone actually gets it! Well done Elle, you’ve been amazing throughout this journey! We’re all here for you!
I lost my daddy 2 n a half years ago n the pain I'm feeling still makes it feel like it was yesterday u never accept it life is never the same all u can do is try to keep going n to try n stay strong sending u hugs 💖
Gurcay Canel I’m sorry for your loss. I lost my father in 2007. I miss him everyday. Time heals all but you never forget. Stay strong 💪🏼🙏🏼
I’m 21 and my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer 2 weeks ago. I’ve been watching your videos for years. I was afraid to watch this video but I can now say that it’s actually so reassuring. I’m only at the beginning of this battle but am looking to you for guidance. Thank you Elle for sharing your story and showing me that there can still be love and joy even in the darkest of times.
Hope your mum is doing well 💜
Greif really is a life long thing, I lost my mum when I was 13 that was nearly 11 years ago now, yet I still cry and think about her all the time! Stay strong and just know your mum is always there even when you think she isn't 💕💕
I also lost my grandmother (who raised me) when i was 13. She was only 59, and this was in 2012.
It’s such a hard age to loose someone tbh
What made it worse is my great grandmother (her mom) lived 4 years after her, so we had each other but i think loosing a child is even worse
I definitely think of her often and cry a lot to this day.
I don’t get upset at holidays, it’s little things
Like the summer before she died, we watched big brother. She would make us popcorn, soda even with how sick she was..
And this year, the winner of that season came back.. i had a full on breakdown as i no longer watch the show, but an ad popped up and i hadn’t seen his face since we watched the show together and i sobbed for a while after
It does get easier but it never fully goes away
I lost my Auntie 6 days ago to an 8 year battle of cancer. She had it in three areas then got rid of it all and then it hit harder, she was given two years to live in 2015 but got through another 5 years from then. She was due to stay at her dads on morphine on monday just to keep her comfortable but sadly as they were getting her ready to leave hospital she passed. i’ve been following this story not only because i watch your normal videos but because i knew the time was coming for my auntie too.. your whole aspect and way of getting through it has really helped me do the same. thank you❤️
Madi Faye I’m sorry for your loss , stay strong 💓💓
lol
Erinxo thank you❤️
D1 err? you ok?
D1 what is wrong with you ??
Each and every one of you in the comments who has lost someone I’m sending all my love and bravery to you as I couldn’t even imagine going through something so horrendous but being so brave whilst doing it . You should all be proud of yourself and you Elle . We’re all here supporting , every step of the way ❤️❤️
❤️❤️
I couldn’t watch it all my heart hurts, but I know if I ever need it . I’ve got this video to look back on, strong lady ❤️
Just incase you ever want to come back to it here's a notification 💜
My mum died of a brain tumour when I was 4 and I’m still looking for closure❤️ thank you for making this amongst the pain❤️
No words could possibly do yours and yours mums strength, bravery and courage any justice. You are both incredibly beautiful souls. I hope that one day you can look at yourself through the eyes of your mum and see what a truly beautiful reflection of her you are ❤️Xxxx
Oh Elle. I know everyone is telling you you’re so brave but my admiration for you is sky high. You truly are an incredibly brave amazing woman. Crying and sharing your vulnerability doesn’t make you any less brave but the way you respected your mums choices throughout her story and the dignity and love you carried on with is truly brave and so strong. My heart broke watching this for you, I’m sorry you had to go through it. I’m sorry anyone has too. Out of a truly heart breaking story you’ve still found some light sharing your story and helping so many people who are going through something similar. Your mum must be incredibly proud of you and your sister. You are inspiring to us all. Love you Elle
You’re actually so brave Ellie I couldn’t imagine the pain and every emotion really what you’re going through right now. 🥰
Abby Streets yea she is brave for making money on her mother’s death 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
baba BZNZ what she’s done is incredibly brave of her, she’s sharing with her audience her story in losing her mother which can help so many people going through the same thing. Have some respect man
@@za88y there’s someone wrong with you, please seek help
i haven’t personally ever had to deal with loss, nor can i imagine what you’re going through. but, i can understand how this video can help others going through similar situations. im sending you and katie so much love and positivity. you’re incredibly strong and never ever alone 🤍
I’m losing my mum right now, I feel so alone and so angry. I’ve been told anger is normal. My mum now has the syringe driver too.
Thank you for putting this video up, just knowing someone has gone through this and knowing I’m not alone is a big help.
Thank you and I have to say I really admire what you’re doing, I’m sending you lots of love and hugs.
Take care xx
I lost my mum when I was 12, i'm now 16 and I still miss her more and more each day! when my mum passed away I needed a video like this so I knew I wasn't alone, so this really helped! thank you and I hope you're okay xx
So sorry for your loss. I lost my mom about one n half yrs ago.. I m still struggling and crying every other night. I m still struggling to find a way to cope with this pain n looking for answers how to live without my mom.
Chris Tan hi, I’m so sorry also for your loss, you’ll never be over the death of someone special, but just keep doing you! When you ever get upset just think about how happy and proud she is of you, and everything you do, do it even better just for your mum!
@@poppyrose7969 hi poppy thanks for the comforting words. Can I ask you how you fight this pain of losing your mom at such a young age. How long has this been for you till today? You are so strong and I pray your mom will always protect you from above. Till this day some nights I will burst into tears. Nothing can be more painful for me than losing a mother. Stay strong Poppy Rose. And thanks for sharing.. Truly appreciate
Chris Tan thank you and I hope you are okay! I’m sure your mum is so unbelievably proud of you! It has been 4 years since my mother passed x
@@poppyrose7969hi.. Please be strong! I know your mom loves you very much and she will protect you wherever you are.
I lost my dad last year and the pain I felt that day I never thought I’d ever feel heartache that much.
He will always be in my heart and my thoughts all the time.
My mum passed away with cancer 12 years ago so both my parent are my angels 👼
Charlene Shearsby I’m so sorry for your loss , they must both be so proud of you and will always be watching over you 💓
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 so sorry sweetheart
I know how hard this must be for you, as I said before I was 23 and I lost my mom unexpectedly she was here one day healthy next day it was the hardest time of my life, I was angry at everyone, my son was just a couple months oldand I didn't want my mother-in-law to give me any advice since my mother couldn't. I was working in emergency room and found it so hard to have any compassion for people coming in on losing a relative. I went through so much anger anger and pain. My advice to you would be just talked about her when you're around other people just like she was still here keep her memory alive
🦋 Although you can not hear her voice or see her smile no more, your mother walks beside you still just as she did before. She listens to your stories and she wipes away your tears, she wraps her arms around you and she understands your fears. It’s just she isn’t visible to see with human eye, but talk to her in silence and her spirit will reply. You’ll feel the love she has for you, you’ll hear her in your heart, she’s left her human body but your souls will never part. . . . . . . . Really sorry for the loss of your mother. It truly shows how amazing your mother was as she has raised such beautiful daughters with so much strength. I know you would say your mum is your hero but honestly you was put on this planet to be your mums hero.
All my love 🌸💜
Sorry for your loss...it's true grief stays with you forever. I lost my dad when I was 12..it doesn't just go away after a short period of time. I still have periods of crying even after nearly 25 years
I think about him most days. He wasn't here at my wedding, grandkids and seeing them growing up..etc it's hard
Thinking of you... don't you feel any guilt she'll always be there in your memories
I lost my mum last year in March at the age of 54 due to multiple tumour cancer- she fell ill on a Monday night, and rapidly deteriorated then died on the Saturday. It all happened so quickly. It will always stick with you (I still occasionally have nightmare now that she's in the hospital and I have to bring a cure to her but I get stuck and don't make it in time) . It does get easier with time, you learn to discuss the good memories with happiness and not sadness. Myself and my younger sister can reminisce now about our family memories without tears. The first Christmas without her was tough but we kept up our usual family traditions. It'll be tough without her with the big milestones such as marriage, having kids etc. There are a lot of people out there who lost parents prematurely, we all get through it one way or another
Thank you for telling us this very sad story and being so honest. I lost my mum when I was 18 (I’m 52 now). I couldn’t sit with her for her last hours (my brothers and sisters and my dear dad did) and I do regret that. You are a very brave young lady as was your beautiful dear mum. Xxxxxxx. I kno you will 100% but look after Katie. I send you both lots of love. Xxxx.
I sometimes regret not being there in my Granda's last moments but part of me is glad because I don't think I could've coped with replaying that moment over in my head. You were only 18, she would've known how much you adored her and I'm sure she would hate you to regret that. Sending love to you, I'm sure she's so proud of the woman you are
Elle you are such a strong person 💛 you’re being so brave, honest and raw telling us all your story of losing your mum 🥺 I lost my grandmother in January 2019 very suddenly and I miss her with all my heart every single day! She always treated me like her very own daughter we were so close and I never imagined the day I’d have to live with out her 🥺 there were days when I thought I’d never be happy again but it’s strange how true it is that time really does help! you slowly learn to live with this new reality and hold on to the memory of them so dearly, looking forward to the day when we are hopefully reunited in our own time 💛 I truly believe we never fully lose the people we love, they are always with us throughout our lives just like your mum is with you every single day 💗 she’d be so proud of you, just as we are too!! ❤️ x
I would feel for her if she didn't monetize the video.. feels wrong to make money from this tragedy
@@lavickers2852 Are you serious? You don't feel sympathy because she's simultaneously doing her job AND sharing her story? I take it you don't feel sorry for people who have to work while they're grieving either, no?
Elle Darby we love you, you strong admirable woman. I truly believe she waited to have one last Mother's Day with you before passing on. You will forever treasure that last conversation with her. 🤍
I seriously cried when she start talking about her last convo with her mom . Elle your such s strong girl seriously I never thought from all those amazing videos you have posted on your channel that you was going thru such a difficult time . You always tried to put a smile on your face seriously I haven’t seen such a strong girl . Love you and stay strong ❤️🥺
When my mum was diagnosed with cancer last february i felt like my world had ended. This video has helped me massively. So thankyou. 💔❤️
I share your pain. Stay strong coz your mom wants you to move on and live your life to the fullest. Remember you are not alone. I lost my mom to cancer too.
This was so inspiring to watch. I lost my grandad to cancer, he was a huge part of my life and watching him pass was the hardest thing ever so watching you tell your story was so brave! Sending the biggest virtual hug your way ❤️
I’ve never felt like I’m having a one - to - one chat with a TH-camr more than I did through this video 💕
I lost both of my grandads to cancer in the space of 5 months . One died very suddenly in one day and no one saw it coming and my other one went through it very slowly until he was in a hospice and I was there when he took his last breath 💕
Only 30s in and I already feel like I’m going to tear up 🥺 I can’t even begin to imagine how you have found the strength within you to do this right now, I can see in your eyes the pure pain you are feeling and how vulnerable you letting yourself be💔 thank you for helping so many people by putting your pain out there & showing people it’s okay not to be okay. I love you angel 😇❤️
Just to be so selfless & think of helping other people right now just shows the type of woman you are. A woman your Mum I'm sure was so proud of & will be looking down on so proud right now. The strength you have shown is just inspirational. Sending lots of love to you & your family xx
Elle, I haven’t watched this video because I lost my mum just under three months ago and I know it’d be too hard for me, but I just wanted to say that you’re not alone. My mum was my best friend and the only person I truly ever loved, and I won’t lie, it’s been awful and isn’t getting any easier. Aside from your world being turned upside down you’ll probably learn that a lot of people you called friends or family aren’t the people you thought they were. You’ll see a side of yourself you never thought was there. You’ll have days where you want to be around people all the time and days where anyone near you makes you want to scream. It’s shit, and I’m not going to sit here and pretend it’s all sunshine and rainbows again after a few weeks. However, having people to talk to is so important. I know you have Con and your sisters but sometimes it’s a hell of a lot easier to have a rant to someone who isn’t so emotionally involved in the situation. It’s one of the things that I couldn’t have lived without recently. I know I’m just a stranger on the internet, but please reach out if you come across this comment and just want to chat to someone who knows how you’re feeling. My Twitter or Insta is glassbeats, I’m 21 and I’m called Charlotte. Sending you all of my love Angel x
Bless you and I understand everything you said because I went through it too. Take your time to deal with it. You'll never get over it but you will learn to live with it IN YOUR OWN TIME. Sending love to you and your family xxx
Mandy Jackson Thank you x
Couldn't relate to you more. I am also 21, my mum fell asleep yesterday following a four and a half year journey of ovarian cancer. It's so so tough isn't it, especially when you're closer to your mum than anyone can imagine. You're ready xx
@@oliviagrace5108 Just wanted to send love to you, I'm 24 and my mum is down to the final days of her 3 and a half year ovarian cancer battle just now and I feel just so sad. Ovarian cancer is so aggressive and her deterioration has happened so quickly that how she was even 3 weeks ago feels a lifetime ago now, it truly feels like I've stepped into a parallel universe. I don't know what I can offer or what to say but your comment resonated so strongly with me and I just wanted to send love xxx
So sorry for your loss may she rest in peace 💔😇💕💞❤
Elle you are honestly so strong ❤️ I lost my dad last July due to a long fighting battle with depression and it honestly broke me and I lost myself completely! I know everybody says this, but it will get better I have just accepted that he has gone, and it takes time. Your have your good days and your bad days. And the firsts are honestly the worst but it does get better. It’s so important to talk. You have honestly gone through such a journey and you make all us angels so proud of you ❤️ lots of love xx
sending all my love
Lots of love and strength to you 💓💓
You are so incredibly brave. You should be so proud of yourself❤️x
What a kind soul you always think of others even in times like this! You’re incredible Elle 💕
I don’t think you realise how much of an inspiration you are, You are such a brave beautiful soul, your mum will be so proud of you, you’re helping so many people. Never forget your mum will always be with you, sending you all my love hunny, you should be so proud of yourself ❤️
I am so glad I found this... My mum passed away due to cancer 2 weeks ago (I'm 25) and can relate to so much of this 💕💕 thank you so much xx
I can’t believe people are disliking this video... This is the saddest video I’ve ever watched I am in tears! Elle has the biggest heart and her mum will be so proud of her! I can’t even begin to imagine how hard this was to deal with, the loss and the build up, being told she has this long left but then she makes it past it, how scary that must feel. We’re all sending love to you and your family💞 (p.s she’s still looking absolutely beautiful)
I literally want to give you the biggest hug ❤️ this is so so brave! I am deeply so so sorry for you loss. Sending you all the love and positivity. Xxx
This is amazing can't imagine how hard this must've been! I lost my Dad two years ago really unexpectedly after he fell down the stairs, there was nothing like this about and even though this is a different circumstances this makes me feel like I'm not alone and there are people who understand how I feel. Elle you're helping so many people by doing this, your Mum would be so so proud! You are a real life angel 💛😇xxx
I couldn’t stop crying. You’re amazing and brave . I had to go through the same feeling when my mum died on 25 December. It was like I lost everything . You have to be strong for your sister and your boyfriend. Everyone is there for you beautiful. Your mum is always with you . She will protect and love you and your sister forever ❤️❤️🥺
I lost my mom in 2015. It’s 5 years this years in July. She died 6 days before her 55th birthday. I totally relate to everything you have said Elle. My mom died of cervical cancer. Virtual hugs coming your way lovely. I’m so glad I have my fiancé. He’s my rock. Keep strong Elle. Your mom is always with you x
I lost my mum last night to cancer, she was diagnosed 2 months ago, that's all the time we got with her :( I am now taking full-time care of her 8 year old daughter/my sister and I am so scared to do this without her. Your video has given me a bit of comfort, thank you for sharing your story x
I'm crying before El even speaks a word, the whole vibe of the video, emotional ♥️
Lots of love Elle💕🌷
Ele you are such a strong person and think I speak for everyone when I say we are so proud of you ❤️
Absolutely
Your mum was right, you were being so brave. Such a strong beautiful girl. You did everything you possibly could do to make your mum's last years what she wished for. You should be extremely proud of yourself for that for the rest of your life
Really sorry for your loss of your mum and thank you for being brave enough to discuss this on a public platform. I lost my mum last year during the pandemic and couldn't attend her funeral or get back home at all. It's such a hard thing to lose a parent. Sending you lots of love.
It's taken me nearly a year to pluck up the courage to watch this. I've lost people suddenly and to long term illness, (cancer, fatal heart attacks, brain tumours, demensure, suicide etc) no loss is easy.
But I think with long term illness you get a chance to cherish them and prepare yourself as much as you can for the end. It doesnt stop the grief, nothing does. God be be with you and your family, your mum will always be with you.
My cousin died 12 years ago and I still talk to him nearly everyday, he was 38. His Son who was 17 at the time, got married yesterday, I know he was there cheering him on.
i have a stronger relationship with my stepmom rather than my mum. my stepmom has an extremely rare condition with only 6 people in the world have. She’s trying to live her life but it is slowly getting worse. i will never forget the time when she had a seizure infront of me. one minute she was showing me the shopping the next minute i was shouting my dad to call an ambulance. i’m taking every time i spend with her the best i can make it because i never know when that last time is going to be. be strong lovely, she’s looking over you and she’s very proud of you 💓xx
i love that connor is so good with you and i’m so happy you have such a good support system around you. You are strong and incredible to be doing this. We are all proud of you & katie xxx
Oh, Elle😫 My heart bleeds for you angel. I lost my mum in July, and then my Dad just 3 weeks before your Mum passed. It hurts so much, but we will get through this. As you said, grief comes over me now and again, but I know they are with me. I turned 21 at the end of March, and the fact that I didn't have my Mum here to celebrate was awful. I'm sending you all the love xxx
i cried with you throughout this video, i lost my mother back in 2018 i was twelve/ thirteen when my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, she passed away when i was fourteen and even though i have 3 older sister we all dealt with it differently and i felt so alone, now im eighteen and their hasn't been a day i don't think about her and watching this video gave me sense of comfort so thank you for sharing something so difficult and personal to help others
I also lost my mum to advanced lung cancer on 17th November 2021 and im only 17😔😭💔
@Jake McClendon why the fuck you saying lol it wont be like that when someone you love gets a life threatening illness
@@Josh-so8tz I'm so sorry for your loss 💔 If you need anyone to talk to... I'm here 🤍
It gets easier with time......never get over it and move on and all the support in the world cant help you....its time, it all gets easier with time.
My advise, just enjoy the little things in life and that a simple smile can make you feel better.
My dad didnt pass away from cancer but i lost him when i was 17. Suddenly and he was my rock, he was my best friend and 7 years later, i find myself talking to him...even if he is not here, telling him what is going Off and it helps.
You are not alone either but thank you for making me not feel alone.
Elle, you should be so proud of yourself. I'm really lucky that I've gotten to 25 and have never had to deal with the loss of someone close to me (touch wood) but I hope that when the time comes I will be able to carry myself the way you have. I know your mum will be so proud of you. I hope Katy is doing as well as she can possibly be at this time. I'm thinking of you both xx
I lost my dad suddenly when I was 13. Still think about him every day 12 years later and definitely felt alone as a child losing a parent. Im really sorry for your loss xx
Thanks for making this video xx
Elle you did this video with such poise and grace my heart goes out to you. Your such a beautiful person inside and out take care xx
Elle Darby, you are a true angel. I really admired how you explained grief. Everyone grieves different and it is something that sticks with us. The memories and new adventures we wish they could be right along with us in the moment is painful. It’s normal to experience this, but just know you are so strong and so brave to tell your journey. Thank you for it all. 💞
Thank you for sharing this, showing us that people can be so selfless, I think I need to remember its not about me, it’s about them, my mum had to give all her time to my nan before she died and I didn’t understand or know how hard it would of been. You are right always try to make it light hearted when you can!
My dad was diagnosed with a grade 4 brain tumour scattered all over his brain, so our journeys have been pretty similar from the point of grade 4 diagnosis. He passed away 18 months after diagnosis on 2nd January 2020 when I was 15, my sister was 12 and my brother was only 8. We “celebrated” his 45th birthday on the 25th of July. There are so many things I could say and agree with but this comment would be too long. All I can say is that I am so so glad that I came across this video ❤️❤️ thank you so so so so so much for sharing xxxx
I lost my mum at the ages off 17 , 7 years ago she was my best friend and she had it in a few areas and then traveled to her brain. I watched her take her last breathe and Ino exactly what your going through.. the pain never goes but you live your life go deal with it.😢 stay strong Ino how hard it is.❤️xxxxxxx
I think I speak for everyone when I say I’m so proud of you 💕🙌
The bravery and courage you radiate is beyond inspiring. My fiancé and I are also experiencing this, his mum was diagnosed with a brain tumour the size of a grapefruit Boxing Day 2014, also on the same part of her brain, causing her to loose her memory, speach, causing her to be incontinent, she had surgery to remove the tumour, of which they thought was successful.. only to discover on her annually review it had came back, even now to this day she is living with her brain tumour.. every day we pray it doesn’t grow. This video is the strength and shoulder we all needed back then. You are so inspirational and I am so great full for you. Thank you xo
You are one of the kindest people, you are literally like a therapist, you have made everything so much better for me, and have helped me through some of my darkest times. Your mum and everyone around you will forever be proud of you and the most special person you have become. Thank you for just being you! xx
I've currently got someone very close to me and who I see everyday, battle with cancer and I spent almost my entire christmas and new year period this year in and out of hospital when she was having her chemotherapy and radiotherapy treatments. I never shared any of that online and it was a real personal struggle, i really get the *need* to find somebody to relate to. It's so incredible scary seeing how fast a person can deteriorate and how quickly cancer can take hold.
This video was incredible, youre so gracious and you've done your mum so so proud 💕🙏🦋
Naomi Victoria stay strong 💓💓
My nan who is one of the most important people in my life has a few weeks left to live...we only found out she had cancer a few days ago, and i live 5 hours away. She really doesent want me to visit because of corona, she saidit would give her alot more to worry about
Naomi, I am so so sorry to hear you are going through this. I have watched your videos for a while and just wanted to say I will keep you in my thoughts. Sending you loads of love ❤️ Always here if you need someone to chat to xx
From someone who lost their mum age 10 all I can say is thank you for this video and how honest your Instagram stories have been❤️ I’m 24 now and still struggle with it, but these vids help me along ❤️❤️
I lost my mother, my best friend to spreaded ovary cancer when she was only 46... I was 18 when se slept away.
The saddest thing is that her death is so final.
Sometimes I just feel like I want to die too, so I wouldnt have to live without her. I have to try to keep on living for my siblibgs, my little sister is just 10 years old and she leans towards me.
Moms death has also changed dad, sometimes I am scared of him if he might yell, I think that is why my sister leans to me instead of him.
It is really hard to live cause mum was the glue to our whole family...
She wasn’t just a mom. She was my best friend, literally. Someone who always listened, always made me feel safe and loved.
Without her love life just feels empty.
Relate to this so much,she was my best friend!
@@BekaBelle ❤️❤️
This breaks my heart. I feel beyond sorry for you💔.I know I am not in the position to say that because I luckily can’t relate to you but it will get better and you will come to a point where you will truly love life again. Don’t give up. She will always watch over you and your family.
August 2019 i lost my gran to a very short 12 month cancer battle that got to her brain. I cannot begin to explain how much this video brought me comfort and such a release of emotion that has given me strength that im not alone. Elle just like you I’d searched youtube to find this very video... cancer might of taken my family, but it will never take my happiness... you hold so much strength and will have your mum right with you. They tell us this in their last few days, and make sure we know they’re going to a better place. i know they’re by our side x
Thank you so much for making this video. I lost my mum last August after a 10 year battle with bone cancer, she was diagnosed when I was 14. I can relate to so many things you went through, particularly not really acknowledging properly what was going on and making jokes. Also having to deal with changing roles and becoming the carer. This video has allowed me to fully confront what happened and let out some tears. Sending lots of love to you - so brave to make this video xxx