I am a foster parent and it is challenging at times. I read your book - The Boy Raised as a dog - it gave me sooo much hope for my foster child. As I see all of the behaviors and educational challenges related to my foster child, I gained hope as I read your book. My child had a challenging day yesterday, I needed to listen to your lectures - thus giving me more hope for my child's future. Your lectures and book reminds me to not give up on my child.
Wow I haven’t even finished the talk and already love him!! He’s on point! Look at the eastern cultures and the concept of family … it’s specific to not immediate family but extended family plus the community … they literally live by the concept of “it takes a village”
I am from an eastern country. When I was young, I could walk from my house to my groundma’s house and my aunties’ house within 10 minutes. I had close relationships with a big extended families. Now I am in Australia. My kids only have parents, and one pair of grandparents in their lives. All the other extended families are far away and also gradually lose bonding. It is a loss.
Eastern cultures family numb , suffocate , dismiss all emotional responses. There is only fear and harm in eastern cultures because they expext obedience to authority. Eastern culture families have silence and gaps in understanding what the authority wants from them. There are many social events and many relationships across families , but they all consider children as idiots and burden. Silence is the only response a child speaks. You are very lucky to be born and raise din America where kids emotional and social life exists with safe adults
Bruce Perry is amazing. I was assigned his book for a class in my education major class. I can’t stop thinking about it, talking about it, and reading it!
After watching this video of Dr. Bruce D. Perry, which highlights the importance of growth during early childhood years, where a child learns the lessons for their whole life. child develop socially physically emotionally through that period of time which is really sensitive period of their life. he placed us(educators) and parents as the game changers, where we can change the old patterns of child development. I personally and professionally felt more responsible now as an early childhood educator after listening to this video. because the interactions and experiences a small child is going to have with me and his parents are the base of his holistic development. like he tells that 'development adversity is a powerful determinant of health(multiple domains) and in global wellness'. which means relationships and positive interactions are must for child development. if we invest as educators in the young ones then definitely this will boost upcoming adult's health too. likewise, we can contribute in creating a world full of creativity, humanity and productivity.
Listening to this takes me back to my Early Childhood classes ❤️ I recently finished taking my major classes two years ago and I remember listening to his videos in my toddler & infant classes
04:49 Croatians pride for inventing the tie/cravat. Story goes in the 17 century during the 30 years war the French saw Croatian soldiers on horseback wearing some sort of neckerchief (tied by their girlfriends or wives back home) and it became fashionable and called a la Cravat (like a Croat).
Very engaging speech with some astounding figures that we simply are unaware of. I am constantly in awe of how bright and inquisitive children are, yet many of them decline when not engaged in the right manner. Great video!
I think there is a huge gap in development. And that is awareness. What ever means you have, what is it to the individual who has no idea or couldn’t care less? Free will to be
I am primary caregiver for a critical care 11 year old boy, and we are using the Bruce Perry model of caring for him. We being the Ministry for Children and Families and his care team of myself, the contractor, his teachers and his youth care workers. When he was younger he was not nurtured by his parents and he was abused. He was bounced around from the age of 1 and a half between care homes other than 3 years he spent living with his Aunt and her family from when he was 6 till he was 9. His aunt did the best she could however was given little help financial or respite from the ministry as they don't do that for family members. His aunt had to work full time on top of trying to raise him. He did learn manners from her but he has no empathy at all. When he came to me he had very good manners and tried at least to pick up after himself at home. Since he has been allowed to do, eat, say, etc. exactly as he pleases, following the Bruce Perry model he has gotten progressively worse. The manners he had when he arrived are now nowhere to be seen. He realizes no one will challenge him and he takes full advantage of that. Is this really helping him in the long run? You already have a child with a huge sense of entitlement, who is manipulative and feels his workers are there only for him to use as slaves. He says this. He is brilliant intellectually but not so much socially. He does not have to endure any consequences for his actions so therefore feels he should have what he wants when he wants and becomes extremely violent when he doesn't get his way. He is 5 feet tall and 150 lbs so when he punches and kicks us, we hurt. There is nothing done for us when this happens. What are we to do? He only goes to school a half hour a day because he was violent at school and they have for good reason a zero violence policy. He runs everyone around him ragged. What is the answer for a child like this?
Deb Lapushinsky what do you mean by the "Bruce Perry Model"? You all read the book, or you have NMT assessments, etc.? Are you a certified NMT site? I have seen people struggle with the boundary part of a more relational model. My guess is you don't have the proper training or guidance.
The Bruce Perry model is that love conquers all. And yes I have read everything he has put into print. This model would work really well if a person can get these damaged children at a much younger age, before they become manipulative in the system. And Kiva, if I don't have the proper training then neither does our entire team lol.
Deb Lapushinsky I think you may be misinformed about the 'model.' Are you using NMT? Just having read his work, etc. is not sufficient. These cases are so complex, that to think just having read 'everything he's put into print' makes one able to do the work is folly. However, I would agree that the later we get them, the more difficult the road. So, doing NMT or not? On-going training and staffing?
If your government's " Ministry for Children and Families " was in any way taking on board the key insights from Bruce Perry's work , they would be recognising the key value of relationships , and wouldn't be denying equal support to kinship carers like the boy's aunt! When they act so radically against those principles by making needed support and respite dependent on relational and care disruption, it's difficult to imagine that their program would have any meaningful connection to Perry's work. I feel bad for you and for the young man , and I help you get some more support.
We live in a society that does not value children and families. Your data re: early childhood education is well established. But very few parents can access it. When I was young and single, I taught preschool, which I loved. But I couldn’t afford to live on what I was making. Now as a single mother, I can afford it even less. ECE must be subsidized in order for it to be equitable. A subsidy for parents to stay home and raise their kids isn’t a bad idea either.
I love your talk and I wish that all parents and caregivers would watch this! I am wondering about the suggestion of what is best for my son. To live near my family even though I don't find that they are good role models and don't see eye to eye on sensitive loving parenting or move, but work on finding close friends who have the same parenting style?
I love your talk. Thank you so much. I am right there on board. Have been for decades. Plus my profession is in the field of early childhood. The one thing I was uncomfortable with was the reference to mother and not father. We really have to get away from this blame it on the mother mentality. Quite outdated. While mothers are still the majority when it comes to primary caregivers, fathers have really stepped up to the plate in the last 10 to 15 years or so. I think the only reference I heard to fathers was the example of the whole family out to eat and they were all on their devices. Please take this into consideration. Thank you for the work you are doing to raise everyone's awareness about social emotional connections in early childhood and the impacts it has for their lifetimes and future generations life times. Kudos! I am proud to be in the trenches.
Thanks for this video. I didn't know Dr.Bruce, and I know him now thanks to a book of Alice Miller about the childhood trauma (Project nonspank). It recalls very well the importance of the childhood mistreatments in character and in destiny. Maybe today there are an inversion of values with technology where people confuse the means with ends and lose the sense of life. We should recover the values that make possible progress.In USA are life and liberty. Thanks too to Dr.Bruce.
I find your comment above Journey from birth to consciousness -none of us recalls it, to be untrue I can not only remember the last months while in my mother's womb and some of the things she planed to do, or was thinking at the time but also remember like it was yesterday , when she went into labor and the moment i was coming into the world as it became quite bright, but then again that was me, maybe there are others to.
Now I know why the second book is not as immersive as the first one. Thanks for that info, too :) And thank you for your work and effort. I cannot say how much I appreaciate it, because it would break the internet :D Thank you Dr. Perry!!
Am i the only one who feels like it is morally reprehensible that we need to have big conferences to get the message across that you should love your children, or at the very least, not traumatize them?
Great presentation and I do not wish to disparage Perry but I do want to make some points concerning the studies presented around 27:00-30:00. Both studies were published in 2009, 2010. According to google Wikipedia the first iPhone was released in 2007, meaning the specific ramifications of smartphone use in childhood development likely aren't well recorded by the studies. Additionally for the study that does a look-back from the 1930's to the 2000's, it seems apparent that the cohorts tested would be "baby boomers", "gen Xers", and maybe older "millenials". These are people who, yes, grew up with T.Vs, but not the internet or smartphone. Then Perry uses the example of "selfie culture" with modern day kids to illustrate his point about self-interestedness. Do you see the issue? This phenomenon has been going on for at least 100 years according to the papers but there's still this tinge of "kids these days" in his explanation. "We have 18 year old kids with the social emotional skills of 6 year olds". Those kids grew up! They're business leaders and politicians! Steve Jobs was one of these damaged people! This isn't a problem for the next generation, it IS US NOW. EDIT: from the abstract of the first study: Two cross-temporal meta-analyses find large generational increases in psychopathology among American college students (N = 63,706) between 1938 and 2007 on the MMPI and MMPI-2 and high school students (N = 13,870) between 1951 and 2002 on the MMPI-A. They tested college students in 2007...
The quotation at 34:55 ("I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.") was never expressed by Albert Einstein. See Snopes.
Can these skills be lost if they are not used? I feel like there are plenty of older people out there are who are losing their skills and humanity because of too much time spent on social media.
Great presentation. Full of helpful, insightful information. Questions, when he is talking about the DSM and ADHD, at the very end, isn't that true about all DSM disorders, that, for example, MDD (depression) in the DSM is just a list of symptoms and descriptors absent a "disease" process? So is he limiting that to ADHD or is he making a commentary on the DSM? Asking so that I can better understand his comment.
I'm thinking that you are correct in your understanding of Bruce's statement, as evidenced by him saying, "That's the way the DSM-V is constructed." However, there is currently evolving an understanding of the mechanisms that cause many of the disorders described by the DSM. The book The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk touches on this in describing Polyvagal Theory, a description of how evolutionary older parts of the vagus nerve (dorsal branch) and more recently developed sections (ventral branch) interact in regulating our stress response. I may not be explaining that exactly correctly, but it is a very illuminating read that I recommend everyone check out.
well this explains a lot about why this generation is so fucked up with drugs and addictions and why so many are so immature. So the solution is , more connections I guess. I need hugs
Bruce Perry suggest that unless we are intentional with condemning racism it will not perspire away from our midst. I like this guy. Racism has heart my kids, This human challenge is close to my heart.
Typos corrected from previous post. While I have the utmost respect for Bruce, the work he has done and continues to do is vital for the human species, however, what he does not appear to recognize is the fact that the vast majority of us come from moderate to extreme abusive early childhood backgrounds and, therefore the fatalism not intended but nevertheless resoundingly conveyed, early death heart disease and so forth depresses and dampens and leaves (or can leave) one without much hope for the possibility of a healthy life, physically, emotionally-mentally. His "empathy" as he perhaps himself stems from the "right side" of the camp of those who come from early more "salubrious backgrounds" is severely or at a minimum greatly lacking. That is why I and many others turn with great hope to the brilliant and courageous work of those who come from early deprivation, abuse and hell, such as the troubled but brilliant empathic psychoanalyst, Alice Miller. Her brilliant works have brought to bear, with the not only possibility but probability of gaining access to early childhood injuries, overcoming and "re-wiring" if you will, towards greater integration. In fact, I would argue, in an upcoming book that it is precisely those who have suffered amidst the most unspeakable hell that have in a very real sense (artists, poets, psychologists et al) contributed to the greatest depth of awareness, consciousness and empatthic growth of the species. Paradoxically it may seem, although not really, It is those who have been there and have overcome and have created from their layers of unbearable and unspeakable pain combined with their soul of genius that know and contribute the most to the collective consciousness of the species!
Neilgs I couldn't have said it better myself. Jesus is the best way to overcome every adversities life has to throw, He is the only way to truly overcome n heal a lifetime of excruciating painful suffering and only He can give you true authentic everlasting life...At the risk of sounding ridiculously religious I myself have overcome unbearable abuse growing up that took me down a drug induced paths that almost took my life. .. Jesus gave me a new heart, physically replacing it with a mechanical heart valve twice n gave me a new spirit. He was by my side after surgery on Christmas day all alone, neglected by my family to deliver me the most important news that forever changed me. I was given a precious gift of salvation for eternal life through Jesus as He paid my debts in full on the cross with blood.
Neilgs You seem to speak as though you have some kind of special entitlement to human suffering . . . as if you were one of the privileged few . . . If you think of pain as part of the healing process than you have something in common with all humanity . . . In any case I have found that speaking the unspeakable and sharing the pain ex post facto is more beneficial than any amount of suffering
Interesting, isn't this the way life was before Public School was mandatory? I believe this is how the Amish currently live. It takes a village and they are all about community.
Early childhood development is key to the success of a child's future quality of life. An adult characteristics behaviour is parallel to the social development nuture experienced by their early childhood.
I disagree with one of the points he made: A human being is not only what his or her parents passed on or did not pass on. We are not copies of our parents with something added or taken away. The biggest influence on people apart from parents and upbringing is actually peer influence (other kids and people), especially later in adolesence and in life. So we are at least as much influenced by our environment and interactions as by our parents. So bad characteristics as "racism" or" misogyni"or "violence" can be aquired on your own during life just as much as it could be "passed on" by parents.
I think what Bruce is saying in this video is that the period from in-utero to 4 years old is the time where the brain is undergoing the most rapid growth and change and is therefore the most powerful in terms of shaping a child's neurobiology. By the time peer relationships become more influential than parent-child relationships, the brain is about 95% developed and the vast majority of the neural landscape has been developed. I don't think he'd disagree with you, that we are influenced in other ways as well, just that the emphasis is on the first 4 years of life because of how much growth and imprinting occurs then and how this shapes how we process all subsequent experiences.
@@lukehawkins9443 I know what he is saying and I think it is just wrong and an oversimplification. Noone can say for sure how profound the brain changes during life and we know almost nothing about the brain yet. It is just a little proven theory and some kind of scientific arrogance to claim that 95 % of the brain is developed by the time peer relationship emerges as an important factor. The brain changes profoundly all through life. By the way, structural development does not mean the same a functional development. You can demonstrate the mindboggling changes in brain function with people who had a severe stroke or people with chronic long term depression just as an example. Also the significant changes in brain structure and function of older people do not only account for 5 %. Do you have a scientific reference for your claims that is sound?
@@matthuber9925 I think the "scientific reference that is sound" you're asking for is Bruce Perry's life work! If you do want to do some reading, I would suggest Bruce's article from 2006 - Applying Principles of Neurodevelopment to Clinical Work with Maltreated and Traumatized Children. Great place to start!
@@lukehawkins9443 Remember, I agree to a large degree with this article. I agree also with most he says in the video. I do still not agree with what he says about aquiring characteristics such as "racism" or" misogyni"or "violence" mainly in the first years of development. The article says nothing about the "95% of brain development" that you mentioned.
@@matthuber9925 Principle 4 and 5 in the article. By age 4 the bulk of neural imprinting has occurred. Yes, it can and does change constantly over the course of life, but not to the same extent it does in those first 4 years.
team playing where trust should and can be a mainstream thing in life but I dont think people are able to grasp this because for some reason many brains are programmed to manipulate and to always try to be one up on another. do you think this can change we are in a world and their are generations coming up and they need to learn that if one falls we all fall and because people are different in interpreting words the fight and flee gland gets enlarged and when that happens it causes an uncomfortable environment. Bullying will b a thing of the eradicated but because peoples brains havent exercised more of their brain this just might be only in theory or a dream state type of thought procedure.
I have a question...in regard to the brain synopsis creating words, what if you think in scenes/pictures? Is this just a neuro difference or could it be trauma related. Thank You.
50 United States 4 Shared Parenting Mission USA 4 Shared Parenting advocates the rebuttable presumption in favor of equal shared parenting and residence. That shared, frequent, continuing and meaningful contact with both parents after s...
I'm a retired multi skilled engineer, I can't get my son to take any interest in my projects, he spends his life in his room on his computer, after 5 years a collage still he has no idea of what to do about a job, he is now 24 with no direction or interests.
The arrogance is incredible. You expect your son to do be the way you are, belittle him and boast yourself. If you are the leader, take some fucking responsibility!
Its never too late to inspire your son. Dont give up on him. The way to influence him is to spend time with him everyday doing nothing special but listening to his stories. Sit down next to him at whatever distance he is comfortable with and ask how r you feeling? Day one he will say one word.... Go back and ask again next day same question ...how r u feeling ? Dont answer or comment or condem or disdain or frown or project your emotions on him.stay QUIET to listen yo your son. Your deep silence and listening is very powerful. Enguneering a human is different than your job as an engineer. Teachers are the human engineers. The fact that you are here watching thia video says that you want to become a teacher for your child. Just keep your presence clean as water and ultimately your son will see his reflection in your calm water inside and will connect to you. Your interest should be to connect with him not influence him to achieve something. Know your sons every breath and you will feel liberated from the burden of feeling that he is dead. Your burden is not his burden. He needs to feel safe and loved to start his adult life. Dint uae fear or threat to push him to grow up. In USA the motivation to learn comes from inside the student....fweling good about oneself, valuing emotions that open up our hearts to learn. Its very diff approach that other countries in Asia where fear and threat are used to keep student focused and learn data. In America you learn about yourself more than the data bank outside. Schools here make you a master of tools of learning so that you can pick up any learning tool and dig up information. How to learn ia taught in school, what to learn is left to your choice. Your son already knows how to learn if he went to school here. All he wants to know is what is it that he likes. Allow him to seek that
Sometimes, to inspire your children, you need to listen to them and let them inspire you first. There is no way your son has no interests, but perhaps his interests are just not interesting to you. You have to let go of your dreams and desires for him, and let him grab hold of his own. Ask him what he enjoys and truly listen. And then: tell him that it's okay to follow HIS passions. If he becomes an engineer just because you tell him to and not because he enjoys it.. he'll be miserable. Work on building your social relationship with your son now and only push him to be what HE wants to be. He will find it eventually, and with your support, it'll only drive him further to his goals. I'm 22 and just figured out what I want to do in my life. I want to take care of children in their early years for a living, and give them that secure foundation they need to bloom into creative, beautiful masterful individuals in whatever path they choose. It took me nearly 4 years out of high school to figure out what I'd be happy doing for the rest of my life, besides ideally being a stay at home mom if possible. Just started my first ever semester of college in the fall of 2020.
Bruce Perry is amazing. I was assigned his book for a class in my education major class. I can’t stop thinking about it, talking about it, and reading it!
It should be mandatory for every parent of small children to listen to this.
Christine Bork. Before they have children.
I believe every parent should take a mandatory course before having a child, such as a CDA.
I am a foster parent and it is challenging at times. I read your book - The Boy Raised as a dog - it gave me sooo much hope for my foster child. As I see all of the behaviors and educational challenges related to my foster child, I gained hope as I read your book. My child had a challenging day yesterday, I needed to listen to your lectures - thus giving me more hope for my child's future. Your lectures and book reminds me to not give up on my child.
Also not give up on ourself!
I tend to despair of the world, and then I read something like this ❤️
It’s so important to understand those consequences 15:05
Wow I haven’t even finished the talk and already love him!! He’s on point! Look at the eastern cultures and the concept of family … it’s specific to not immediate family but extended family plus the community … they literally live by the concept of “it takes a village”
I am from an eastern country. When I was young, I could walk from my house to my groundma’s house and my aunties’ house within 10 minutes. I had close relationships with a big extended families. Now I am in Australia. My kids only have parents, and one pair of grandparents in their lives. All the other extended families are far away and also gradually lose bonding. It is a loss.
Eastern cultures family numb , suffocate , dismiss all emotional responses. There is only fear and harm in eastern cultures because they expext obedience to authority.
Eastern culture families have silence and gaps in understanding what the authority wants from them. There are many social events and many relationships across families , but they all consider children as idiots and burden. Silence is the only response a child speaks. You are very lucky to be born and raise din America where kids emotional and social life exists with safe adults
Bruce Perry is amazing. I was assigned his book for a class in my education major class. I can’t stop thinking about it, talking about it, and reading it!
what's the name of the book?
So teachers are likely to know his work? Wow.
@@Rif_Rafhe has a famous book called “the boy who was raised as a dog”.
0:55 wow. That's something. Just admitting that one is shy. I'll try that, in my public speaking. Thank you
After watching this video of Dr. Bruce D. Perry, which highlights the importance of growth during early childhood years, where a child learns the lessons for their whole life. child develop socially physically emotionally through that period of time which is really sensitive period of their life. he placed us(educators) and parents as the game changers, where we can change the old patterns of child development. I personally and professionally felt more responsible now as an early childhood educator after listening to this video. because the interactions and experiences a small child is going to have with me and his parents are the base of his holistic development. like he tells that 'development adversity is a powerful determinant of health(multiple domains) and in global wellness'. which means relationships and positive interactions are must for child development. if we invest as educators in the young ones then definitely this will boost upcoming adult's health too. likewise, we can contribute in creating a world full of creativity, humanity and productivity.
Dr. Perry- thank you for your scholarship and sharing your knowledge. ❤
Listening to this takes me back to my Early Childhood classes ❤️ I recently finished taking my major classes two years ago and I remember listening to his videos in my toddler & infant classes
Every teacher need to know this in the schools. All should take this before teaching it should be mandatory for even parents and professionalsmm
Thank you Dr. Perry.....I have read your books....your experience, knowledge & intuition is enlightening!
Love, Love, Love this man's work!
04:49 Croatians pride for inventing the tie/cravat. Story goes in the 17 century during the 30 years war the French saw Croatian soldiers on horseback wearing some sort of neckerchief (tied by their girlfriends or wives back home) and it became fashionable and called a la Cravat (like a Croat).
An incredible job describing the facts clearly & unapologetically! 🙏🙏
Great lecture! How cool was the timing of the child saying "uh oh!"
Hi handsome
Very engaging speech with some astounding figures that we simply are unaware of. I am constantly in awe of how bright and inquisitive children are, yet many of them decline when not engaged in the right manner. Great video!
I think there is a huge gap in development. And that is awareness. What ever means you have, what is it to the individual who has no idea or couldn’t care less? Free will to be
Brilliant talk, so thought provoking, and so very important for the future of our species.
If we all listened to him, we would be so much better!
Maravilhoso. Estou lendo seu livro, é impactante. Descobri meu propósito de vida! Obrigado!
I am primary caregiver for a critical care 11 year old boy, and we are using the Bruce Perry model of caring for him. We being the Ministry for Children and Families and his care team of myself, the contractor, his teachers and his youth care workers. When he was younger he was not nurtured by his parents and he was abused. He was bounced around from the age of 1 and a half between care homes other than 3 years he spent living with his Aunt and her family from when he was 6 till he was 9. His aunt did the best she could however was given little help financial or respite from the ministry as they don't do that for family members. His aunt had to work full time on top of trying to raise him. He did learn manners from her but he has no empathy at all. When he came to me he had very good manners and tried at least to pick up after himself at home. Since he has been allowed to do, eat, say, etc. exactly as he pleases, following the Bruce Perry model he has gotten progressively worse. The manners he had when he arrived are now nowhere to be seen. He realizes no one will challenge him and he takes full advantage of that. Is this really helping him in the long run? You already have a child with a huge sense of entitlement, who is manipulative and feels his workers are there only for him to use as slaves. He says this. He is brilliant intellectually but not so much socially. He does not have to endure any consequences for his actions so therefore feels he should have what he wants when he wants and becomes extremely violent when he doesn't get his way. He is 5 feet tall and 150 lbs so when he punches and kicks us, we hurt. There is nothing done for us when this happens. What are we to do? He only goes to school a half hour a day because he was violent at school and they have for good reason a zero violence policy. He runs everyone around him ragged. What is the answer for a child like this?
Deb Lapushinsky what do you mean by the "Bruce Perry Model"? You all read the book, or you have NMT assessments, etc.? Are you a certified NMT site?
I have seen people struggle with the boundary part of a more relational model. My guess is you don't have the proper training or guidance.
The Bruce Perry model is that love conquers all. And yes I have read everything he has put into print. This model would work really well if a person can get these damaged children at a much younger age, before they become manipulative in the system. And Kiva, if I don't have the proper training then neither does our entire team lol.
Deb Lapushinsky I think you may be misinformed about the 'model.' Are you using NMT? Just having read his work, etc. is not sufficient. These cases are so complex, that to think just having read 'everything he's put into print' makes one able to do the work is folly. However, I would agree that the later we get them, the more difficult the road.
So, doing NMT or not? On-going training and staffing?
Deb Lapushinsky pls try Schema therapy. Good luck and hope it will work for this poor boy.
If your government's " Ministry for Children and Families " was in any way taking on board the key insights from Bruce Perry's work , they would be recognising the key value of relationships , and wouldn't be denying equal support to kinship carers like the boy's aunt! When they act so radically against those principles by making needed support and respite dependent on relational and care disruption, it's difficult to imagine that their program would have any meaningful connection to Perry's work. I feel bad for you and for the young man , and I help you get some more support.
Hey I love this so much and this information needs to reach people.
We live in a society that does not value children and families. Your data re: early childhood education is well established. But very few parents can access it. When I was young and single, I taught preschool, which I loved. But I couldn’t afford to live on what I was making. Now as a single mother, I can afford it even less. ECE must be subsidized in order for it to be equitable. A subsidy for parents to stay home and raise their kids isn’t a bad idea either.
I love your talk and I wish that all parents and caregivers would watch this! I am wondering about the suggestion of what is best for my son. To live near my family even though I don't find that they are good role models and don't see eye to eye on sensitive loving parenting or move, but work on finding close friends who have the same parenting style?
Fascinating talk! Thank you!
I love your talk. Thank you so much. I am right there on board. Have been for decades. Plus my profession is in the field of early childhood. The one thing I was uncomfortable with was the reference to mother and not father. We really have to get away from this blame it on the mother mentality. Quite outdated. While mothers are still the majority when it comes to primary caregivers, fathers have really stepped up to the plate in the last 10 to 15 years or so. I think the only reference I heard to fathers was the example of the whole family out to eat and they were all on their devices. Please take this into consideration. Thank you for the work you are doing to raise everyone's awareness about social emotional connections in early childhood and the impacts it has for their lifetimes and future generations life times. Kudos! I am proud to be in the trenches.
Great segment , True focus towards Children growth , and the future of our World.Thank You for the Teachings.Bless
Bооst уоur brаin pоwеr in 14 dауs? twitter.com/1ba03513cb794157a/status/804578733948444672 Bruсе D Реrrу Sоооосссiаl Еmоtiоnаl Dеvеlорmеnt in Еаrlу Childhоооооd
Thanks for this video. I didn't know Dr.Bruce, and I know him now thanks to a book of Alice Miller about the childhood trauma (Project nonspank). It recalls very well the importance of the childhood mistreatments in character and in destiny. Maybe today there are an inversion of values with technology where people confuse the means with ends and lose the sense of life. We should recover the values that make possible progress.In USA are life and liberty. Thanks too to Dr.Bruce.
I find your comment above Journey from birth to consciousness -none of us recalls it, to be untrue
I can not only remember the last months while in my mother's womb and some of the things she planed to do,
or was thinking at the time but also remember like it was yesterday , when she went into labor and the moment
i was coming into the world as it became quite bright, but then again that was me, maybe there are others to.
Now I know why the second book is not as immersive as the first one. Thanks for that info, too :) And thank you for your work and effort. I cannot say how much I appreaciate it, because it would break the internet :D Thank you Dr. Perry!!
Thanks to Dolores Kohl, Lou Bank and the Chicago Humanities Festival for this opportunity.
Thank you
Am i the only one who feels like it is morally reprehensible that we need to have big conferences to get the message across that you should love your children, or at the very least, not traumatize them?
Just sad. Even animals don't need to be told to nurture their babies, and their babies are born more developed than humans.
Thank you for all you’re hard work! You’ve helped me, and alot of friend so know , how to understand and situate our experiences!
I love him!!
So if the environment was not adequate, how do you repair fractured socio-emotional development?
Fantastic Video!!! Anyone and everyone could benefit from watching this.
Wonderful!!! Just shared it with friends a teachers.
Inspiring.
Great presentation and I do not wish to disparage Perry but I do want to make some points concerning the studies presented around 27:00-30:00. Both studies were published in 2009, 2010. According to google Wikipedia the first iPhone was released in 2007, meaning the specific ramifications of smartphone use in childhood development likely aren't well recorded by the studies. Additionally for the study that does a look-back from the 1930's to the 2000's, it seems apparent that the cohorts tested would be "baby boomers", "gen Xers", and maybe older "millenials". These are people who, yes, grew up with T.Vs, but not the internet or smartphone.
Then Perry uses the example of "selfie culture" with modern day kids to illustrate his point about self-interestedness. Do you see the issue? This phenomenon has been going on for at least 100 years according to the papers but there's still this tinge of "kids these days" in his explanation. "We have 18 year old kids with the social emotional skills of 6 year olds". Those kids grew up! They're business leaders and politicians! Steve Jobs was one of these damaged people! This isn't a problem for the next generation, it IS US NOW.
EDIT: from the abstract of the first study:
Two cross-temporal meta-analyses find large generational increases in psychopathology among American college students (N = 63,706) between 1938 and 2007 on the MMPI and MMPI-2 and high school students (N = 13,870) between 1951 and 2002 on the MMPI-A.
They tested college students in 2007...
The quotation at 34:55 ("I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.") was never expressed by Albert Einstein. See Snopes.
James Duncan
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr. -
Can these skills be lost if they are not used? I feel like there are plenty of older people out there are who are losing their skills and humanity because of too much time spent on social media.
Great presentation. Full of helpful, insightful information. Questions, when he is talking about the DSM and ADHD, at the very end, isn't that true about all DSM disorders, that, for example, MDD (depression) in the DSM is just a list of symptoms and descriptors absent a "disease" process? So is he limiting that to ADHD or is he making a commentary on the DSM? Asking so that I can better understand his comment.
I'm thinking that you are correct in your understanding of Bruce's statement, as evidenced by him saying, "That's the way the DSM-V is constructed."
However, there is currently evolving an understanding of the mechanisms that cause many of the disorders described by the DSM. The book The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk touches on this in describing Polyvagal Theory, a description of how evolutionary older parts of the vagus nerve (dorsal branch) and more recently developed sections (ventral branch) interact in regulating our stress response.
I may not be explaining that exactly correctly, but it is a very illuminating read that I recommend everyone check out.
Based on thus information, it confirms that multilingual individuals are often more intelligent than monolingual. I believe!
Thank you for this validation
well this explains a lot about why this generation is so fucked up with drugs and addictions and why so many are so immature. So the solution is , more connections I guess. I need hugs
good information ❤
Bruce Perry suggest that unless we are intentional with condemning racism it will not perspire away from our midst. I like this guy. Racism has heart my kids, This human challenge is close to my heart.
Wow, can someone send this to the lockdown people?
Childhood developmental trauma impacts how our brains and bodies physically develop
21:51 positiv Feedback?
Any future parent should take parental classes.
Brilliant idea
I'd love to see the 2023 data on empathy and psychopathy markers.
Typos corrected from previous post.
While I have the utmost respect for Bruce, the work he has done and
continues to do is vital for the human species, however, what he does
not appear to recognize is the fact that the vast majority of us come
from moderate to extreme abusive early childhood backgrounds and,
therefore the fatalism not intended but nevertheless resoundingly
conveyed, early death heart disease and so forth depresses and dampens
and leaves (or can leave) one without much hope for the possibility of a
healthy life, physically, emotionally-mentally. His "empathy" as he perhaps
himself stems from the "right side" of the camp of those who come
from early more "salubrious backgrounds" is severely or at a minimum greatly
lacking. That is why I and many others turn with great hope to the
brilliant and courageous work of those who come from early deprivation,
abuse and hell, such as the troubled but brilliant empathic
psychoanalyst, Alice Miller. Her brilliant works have brought
to bear, with the not only possibility but probability of gaining access
to early childhood injuries, overcoming and "re-wiring" if you will,
towards greater integration. In fact, I would argue, in an upcoming book
that it is precisely those who have suffered amidst the most
unspeakable hell that have in a very real sense (artists, poets,
psychologists et al) contributed to the greatest depth of awareness,
consciousness and empatthic growth of the species. Paradoxically
it may seem, although not really, It is those who have been there and
have overcome and have created from their layers of unbearable and
unspeakable pain combined with their soul of genius that know and contribute
the most to the collective consciousness of the species!
Neilgs
I couldn't have said it better myself. Jesus is the best way to overcome every adversities life has to throw, He is the only way to truly overcome n heal a lifetime of excruciating painful suffering and only He can give you true authentic everlasting life...At the risk of sounding ridiculously religious I myself have overcome unbearable abuse growing up that took me down a drug induced paths that almost took my life. .. Jesus gave me a new heart, physically replacing it with a mechanical heart valve twice n gave me a new spirit. He was by my side after surgery on Christmas day all alone, neglected by my family to deliver me the most important news that forever changed me. I was given a precious gift of salvation for eternal life through Jesus as He paid my debts in full on the cross with blood.
Neilgs
You seem to speak as though you have some kind of special entitlement to human suffering . . .
as if you were one of the privileged few . . .
If you think of pain as part of the healing process than you have something in common with all humanity . . .
In any case I have found that speaking the unspeakable and sharing the pain ex post facto is more beneficial than any amount of suffering
Interesting, isn't this the way life was before Public School was mandatory? I believe this is how the Amish currently live. It takes a village and they are all about community.
Real talk 28:45
educators !! watch this
36:21 / 1:00:27
can someone summarize this video for me
Early childhood development is key to the success of a child's future quality of life. An adult characteristics behaviour is parallel to the social development nuture experienced by their early childhood.
Kylie McDonald
We are the chosen people . . . every humane being on the planet
It takes a village.
High Tides
We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.
- Martin Luther King, Jr. -
Chaos wolf parents: Stop visiting relatives and take your kids out of school.
33:53 this toddler understands more about the shit storm we are headed towards than anyone else in the room.... we are in trouble folks
Why do I have the reaction that the toddler should have been muzzled so we could hear him better?? Sorry, not sorry.
I disagree with one of the points he made: A human being is not only what his or her parents passed on or did not pass on. We are not copies of our parents with something added or taken away. The biggest influence on people apart from parents and upbringing is actually peer influence (other kids and people), especially later in adolesence and in life. So we are at least as much influenced by our environment and interactions as by our parents. So bad characteristics as "racism" or" misogyni"or "violence" can be aquired on your own during life just as much as it could be "passed on" by parents.
I think what Bruce is saying in this video is that the period from in-utero to 4 years old is the time where the brain is undergoing the most rapid growth and change and is therefore the most powerful in terms of shaping a child's neurobiology. By the time peer relationships become more influential than parent-child relationships, the brain is about 95% developed and the vast majority of the neural landscape has been developed. I don't think he'd disagree with you, that we are influenced in other ways as well, just that the emphasis is on the first 4 years of life because of how much growth and imprinting occurs then and how this shapes how we process all subsequent experiences.
@@lukehawkins9443 I know what he is saying and I think it is just wrong and an oversimplification. Noone can say for sure how profound the brain changes during life and we know almost nothing about the brain yet. It is just a little proven theory and some kind of scientific arrogance to claim that 95 % of the brain is developed by the time peer relationship emerges as an important factor. The brain changes profoundly all through life. By the way, structural development does not mean the same a functional development. You can demonstrate the mindboggling changes in brain function with people who had a severe stroke or people with chronic long term depression just as an example. Also the significant changes in brain structure and function of older people do not only account for 5 %. Do you have a scientific reference for your claims that is sound?
@@matthuber9925 I think the "scientific reference that is sound" you're asking for is Bruce Perry's life work! If you do want to do some reading, I would suggest Bruce's article from 2006 - Applying Principles of Neurodevelopment to Clinical Work with Maltreated and Traumatized Children. Great place to start!
@@lukehawkins9443 Remember, I agree to a large degree with this article. I agree also with most he says in the video. I do still not agree with what he says about aquiring characteristics such as "racism" or" misogyni"or "violence" mainly in the first years of development. The article says nothing about the "95% of brain development" that you mentioned.
@@matthuber9925 Principle 4 and 5 in the article. By age 4 the bulk of neural imprinting has occurred. Yes, it can and does change constantly over the course of life, but not to the same extent it does in those first 4 years.
Bruce D. Perry: Social & Emotional Development in Early Childhood [CC]
Maladaptive behavior must first be exposed in order to choose those behaviors.
Development doesn’t end with early childhood
team playing where trust should and can be a mainstream thing in life but I dont think people are able to grasp this because for some reason many brains are programmed to manipulate and to always try to be one up on another. do you think this can change
we are in a world and their are generations coming up and they need to learn that if one falls we all fall and because people are different in interpreting words the fight and flee gland gets enlarged and when that happens it causes an uncomfortable environment. Bullying will b a thing of the eradicated but because peoples brains havent exercised more of their brain this just might be only in theory or a dream state type of thought procedure.
I have a question...in regard to the brain synopsis creating words, what if you think in scenes/pictures? Is this just a neuro difference or could it be trauma related.
Thank You.
so the internet says?
17:00
Why is there so much crime in Chicago
🙏🙏🙏🙏💕💕💕
Would have been one in more than four because aunts and uncles
i begged my wife to watch this.
Varies
50 United States 4 Shared Parenting
Mission
USA 4 Shared Parenting advocates the rebuttable presumption in favor of equal shared parenting and residence. That shared, frequent, continuing and meaningful contact with both parents after s...
👏👏👏👏🕊🕊🕊🕊💖💖💖💖
I'm a retired multi skilled engineer, I can't get my son to take any interest in my projects, he spends his life in his room on his computer, after 5 years a collage still he has no idea of what to do about a job, he is now 24 with no direction or interests.
And with all your bragging you still haven't figured out your responsibility in this situation? I bet your parents were very close to you.
The arrogance is incredible. You expect your son to do be the way you are, belittle him and boast yourself. If you are the leader, take some fucking responsibility!
Its never too late to inspire your son. Dont give up on him. The way to influence him is to spend time with him everyday doing nothing special but listening to his stories. Sit down next to him at whatever distance he is comfortable with and ask how r you feeling? Day one he will say one word....
Go back and ask again next day same question ...how r u feeling ?
Dont answer or comment or condem or disdain or frown or project your emotions on him.stay QUIET to listen yo your son. Your deep silence and listening is very powerful.
Enguneering a human is different than your job as an engineer. Teachers are the human engineers. The fact that you are here watching thia video says that you want to become a teacher for your child.
Just keep your presence clean as water and ultimately your son will see his reflection in your calm water inside and will connect to you. Your interest should be to connect with him not influence him to achieve something.
Know your sons every breath and you will feel liberated from the burden of feeling that he is dead. Your burden is not his burden. He needs to feel safe and loved to start his adult life. Dint uae fear or threat to push him to grow up. In USA the motivation to learn comes from inside the student....fweling good about oneself, valuing emotions that open up our hearts to learn. Its very diff approach that other countries in Asia where fear and threat are used to keep student focused and learn data. In America you learn about yourself more than the data bank outside. Schools here make you a master of tools of learning so that you can pick up any learning tool and dig up information. How to learn ia taught in school, what to learn is left to your choice. Your son already knows how to learn if he went to school here. All he wants to know is what is it that he likes. Allow him to seek that
Sometimes, to inspire your children, you need to listen to them and let them inspire you first. There is no way your son has no interests, but perhaps his interests are just not interesting to you. You have to let go of your dreams and desires for him, and let him grab hold of his own. Ask him what he enjoys and truly listen. And then: tell him that it's okay to follow HIS passions. If he becomes an engineer just because you tell him to and not because he enjoys it.. he'll be miserable. Work on building your social relationship with your son now and only push him to be what HE wants to be. He will find it eventually, and with your support, it'll only drive him further to his goals.
I'm 22 and just figured out what I want to do in my life. I want to take care of children in their early years for a living, and give them that secure foundation they need to bloom into creative, beautiful masterful individuals in whatever path they choose. It took me nearly 4 years out of high school to figure out what I'd be happy doing for the rest of my life, besides ideally being a stay at home mom if possible. Just started my first ever semester of college in the fall of 2020.
This was posted 8 years ago. Look at our world today. Corporations have ruined generations of people.
Dr. Seinfeld
Exactly what I was thinking!!!!😂😂😂😂
Humans did not invent the nuclear family. Neither did swans
Anyone else get Jerry Seinfeld vibes from this guy?
I feel like everyone wants to be glorified in some way. 😂😂😂😂 is this yours?
plus he killed is ex wife at stanford Universitys church 1974
No, he didn't.
They found the guy who killed his wife. The security guard killed himself when cops came to arrest him
Bruce Perry is amazing. I was assigned his book for a class in my education major class. I can’t stop thinking about it, talking about it, and reading it!