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@@VenonatJames* Noicee * Charlotte, your satin shirt is so gorgeous on you! Will check it out too! Sending love from BC! The weight one definitely cut in deep but once you find a good friend group, you all just fit and compliment each others' weird and vibe- it's just *chef's kiss* 😘🤌 I'm still FLUFFY! 30lbs down but 60 to go! I got approved for a breast reduction surgery recently (will be in 10-14months)- and it's a massive motivation to go all the way so they can lift, nip and tuck all of it perfectly!
STOP WITH THE BELCHING!!! This phase has been over-done and btw it was NEVER funny, just GROSS. I don't care what the algorythym might indicate! Just no.
Hey Potato Queen, How about a thank you to us that have been and are subscribed, I have been since week one and I hear you "ask" for subs every video but never hear a thank you for us that have. Throw a little love back our way please. Luv ya Queen
The day I got married, my bridesmaid’s close friend died while I was getting my hair done that morning. As important as my wedding was I asked her if she wanted to go be with her friend’s family. It was more important to me that she was ok because I was still going to be married regardless of whether she was there but she declined and said as sad as she was she couldn’t imagine not being there for me. Looking back I can see the strength of our friendship and good, true friends are hard to come by.
My best friend had a misscarriage at 12weeks the day before my wedding…I spend most of that day being on the phone with her comforting her and pushed my appointments to the side to make space for her. I told her I would have loved her to be at my wedding but completely understand if she has to rest and is not in the mood but she refused and said we waited so long for this (have been with my now husband for 11years by then) and she would only miss it if there was no other choice. She was there, she even held a brief speech, we danced together on the dancefloor while crying, people must have thought we were a bit mental since nobody knew about the misscarriage but I don’t care. I am so grateful for her. She is so strong. Happily she fell pregnant only a month after and had a healthy baby girl so that helped her to heal
What I don't understand about these brides yes it's your wedding but it's my life. Your wedding is just one day and when you act an "ass" for that one day, think about how it affects your relationship with your family after that "day".
First story...she's not the asshole for loosing weight before her sister's wedding. She made a choice that benefited her. If her sister and family can't accept that, then maybe that family shouldn't be in her life.
Not to mention, she probably started her weight loss journey before her sister even got engaged. That whole situation is awful!!! She needs a new family!
I lost a considerable amount of weight a few years ago ( and have not regained it). I also had always been the fat sister and my younger sister went through a bit of ambivalence about becoming the “fat sister.” She owned her feelings and didn’t blame me or get angry at me. Was more angry at herself for not having made similar lifestyle changes. I was in a 12-step program for food addiction and she eventually joined and had her own success and is feeling good about that. Regardless of our weight differences at different times in our lives we have been, and continue to be close.
I was really surprised that Charlotte said "I'll play the devil's advocate" and fully expected her to say the OP was the ah. I was really glad she didn't, of course, because anything else just doesn't make sense.
"Let me boil down the first one: I've been making healthy choices in my life and my family is upset about it. Should I have kept being unhealthy instead? " That the thought alone entered her brain shows just how dysfunctional her family is. YOU ARE ALWAYS ALLOWED TO MAKE HEALTHY CHOICES FOR YOURSELF.
Basically OP is not allowed to make any good decisions that will be benefit her so long as it doesn't make the family look just as good if not better than OP. You know, the typical narcissistic logic.
It mainly shows how deeply ingrained fat phobia is in everything. "healthy choices" has such moral value around it. If the wedding got pushed back due to the pandemic then a LOT of us here in the rich first world countries (and the US) have been gaining weight due to lockdowns. Yeah ok maybe you wouldn't gain weight if you did a strict at home work out regime plus ate a restricted amount of calories but this is very hard to maintain when you're mentally challenged by the whole media Rollercoaster we were going through plus potential fear for family members etc etc. Why does the sister and the whole family care that one sister is fatter than the other like that shouldn't be a thing to begin with. Leave the assumptions of healthy choices aside bc this implies fat is always unhealthy and skinny is always healthy.
@@Ruby-yn5fp how is it "fatphobic" for the sis to lose weight. Obviously being too skinny is as bad as being too fat. When you can't control yourself and always go to the extremes then it's unhealthy EITHER WAY. The bride was the a-hole because she was toxic and would rather her sister sacrifice her physical and mental health for her. Phobia means "extremely irrational fear of" Wanting to lose or gain some weight (within the SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN limits so your body does not suffer from either too much or too little) then how is that an irrational fear of being fat? Moderation is healthy. Way more healthy than going to the extreme on either side of this metaphorical rope
@@raincloud-5516 I agree with you on pretty much everything except "Phobia means 'fear of [...]'". And, because I've read that A LOT of times already, I just want to remind you that sometimes the meaning of words can change or depend on context. Like for example the word "die". Do I mean someones gonna die or am I talking about dice? Or, something that fits more to the phobia one: Butterfly. The 'butter' in that word doesnt refer to the butter you put on bread. Butterfly is a completly different word. In other words, please seperate words like 'fatphobia' from words like 'Arachnophobia' and the likes because depending on the context or the rest of the word it has a different meaning. Also, if you google for the definition then Arachnophobia means "extreme or irrational fear of spiders" while when you google fatphobia it says "irrational fear of, *aversion to, or discrimination against* obesity or people with obesity".
@@raincloud-5516 So aside from your definition of fatphobia being wrong (in this case it's used like homophobia) that's not what this person is saying. She said that the sister (bride) is fatphobic because as Charlotte pointed out, she clearly wanted to have someone she saw as ugly because of her size by her side to look prettier. And that while this person did lose weight by making healthier choices, skinny isn't always healthy and a fatphobic culture puts any choice that makes you lose weight and is therefore considered "healthy" on a pedestal. Plus that if a little bit of weight (as OP stated the bride had only gained a little) was such a huge deal, it's because fatphobia is ingrained in our culture, which it is. (I was seriously fat-shamed for gaining weight while recovering from a severe eating disorder ffs). I do agree with you that extremes in either side are bad, however what is currently considered "fat" and what is considered "extremely thin" are pretty detached from reality in my experience and that of most women I know.
When I got married I made the theme “wildflowers.” So everyone in the wedding party just wore anything they wanted. No theme or colors, it was at my parents house. The wedding party ended up looking stunning because everyone was themselves! I couldn’t have been happier. We all wore flower crowns to define the wedding party on my side. The guys had flowers too. My mother, aunt, cousin, sister, best friend, and mother were all my “maidens of honor.” I wouldn’t have it any other way. Their was no agenda, and last minute a family friend played his trumpet as we all walked out together down the “isle.” It was so much fun, everyone hung out, danced and ate. It was amazing, I was so relaxed and wouldn’t have had it any other way.
That sounds just lovely, exactly how the celebration should be. People nowadays make every life event an spectacle for no valid reason, it's so narcissistic imo. They always end up hurting people and finding little trivial things to stress about, and I bet they never look back on it fondly. I just dont get it..
Sometimes these kinds of weddings are best. Got married city hall and avoided all the unnecessary drama, expense and stress. I had just gotten out of hospital and told to take it easy anyway. It was very peaceful, only mom and partner were present. Our friends wanted to throw us a party and I said no thank you. We are older with past negative experiences and so a large reception wasn’t a big deal for us. They all had big lavish weddings when they were younger and didn’t get why we wanted to keep it simple.
I had a friend that asked me to be one of his groomsmen. But then the bride DEMANDED that her brother be in the wedding party. The groom felt REALLY bad about cutting me out but I said, “Don’t worry about it, As a groomsman my job is to make your day easier! Put me in charge of ice.” So now… we’re still friends, but the brides not the bride anymore.
Both my step mother who raised me and my half sister never told me when they got married, I found out months later both times (I don’t use social media but they have my number) with that and among other things I’ve realized I never meant anything to them at all so I stopped trying to keep relationships with people or family who don’t appreciate it. Life lesson learned and I couldn’t be happier.❤🩹 Love you Charlotte!☺
She gets healthy and loses 100 pounds -- an AMAZING accomplishment -- and her sister thinks she did it to upstage her. Yeah, I completely turned my life upside down for a whole year JUST TO PISS YOU OFF.
I lost weight before a holiday one year and one of the girls dropped out saying I’d done it on purpose to look cuter, and she wouldn’t be going because no one would be interested in her anymore. OKAY then, you just live in your little world love. I think she was a bit precious to be fair 😂😂
She probably thinks her sister did it upstage her because it's what she would have done herself. And the family agrees because they are also the type to do something just to upstage someone else. Awful people always think other people are being awful too, and it is a total mindf*ck to grow up with.
I was always the fat one in my family so when I lost a lot of weight and got healthier (before kids lol) my brother called me a CRACKHEAD and then said my marriage was a GREENCARD marriage, and my husband would leave me. His wife gained a lot of weight (which I don't mind, whatever, be comfy however you want but like... ironic) and she LEFT him after only like a year and a half. I have two kids and we will be married four years in April. He also lost all his hair.
Karma is a beautiful warrior goddess. It sounds like you might be one too. I am so happy for you that you have moved on to a happier, healthier place in your life and let your toxic brother deal with his own poisonous self.
I'll never understand why so many people think drugs are the only way for a person to lose weight. Like I know so many people that see a skinny person and think they must be a drug addict. It's very bizarre. Like maybe they have an eating disorder or a medical condition, maybe they are poor and barely eat... I would guess that the people who say these things are insecure and this is what they have to tell themselves to feel better. Not that that makes it ok, just trying to understand the logic, or lack there of.
When my son was 5 his Dad got married. They did the wedding at the courthouse and did not include my son. He was so hurt, especially because he had a good relationship with his stepmother because I encouraged it. She's a really great lady. Needless to say when my husband and I got married a year later, my son was very involved. He called it "our wedding". I had him walk me down the aisle. My husband, his stepfather, was adamant that my was included in the wedding and my husband even had vows to my son. My son is 31 now and he still remembers that he wasn't included in his Dad's wedding.
Thats really sad.. I'm glad you encouraged him to have a good relationship with his step mother. How could someone not allow their 5 year old son to come to their wedding? What reason could there be? It's so sweet you made sure he was such a big part of your wedding, being included so much must have made him feel valued and special
You can't blame the five year old. You need to have a discussion with his mother you said it yourself she's been coaching him. When he gets older he may realize how badly he treated you I know from experience my 17 year old step son apologized to me on his treatment of me being his stepfather his mother and grandmother both told him that I wasn't his father so he didn't have to listen to me it sucked when we divorced he came to live with me
@@angelperez-leon8042 Who's blaming my 5 year old? I've always encouraged his relationship with his Dad and Stepmother. FYI, my 5 year old in this anecdote is now 31.
My dad has been married twice, once when we were around 4 or 5 and again last year (I'm 28 now), and didn't invite me to EITHER one. The first time, he didn't bother even TELLING my mother he was married until she saw them together at his dad's funeral and saw she was pregnant
For the weight loss sister I BET she didn’t tell her family because their commentary and constant projection on her body impacted how she treated herself and needed some peace
Yeah that first post.... given the fact that she had to move away from her family to lose weight, she wasn't comfortable enough to tell them she was losing weight, and the fact her parents took her sisters side in believing she was trying to upstage her.... I'm sure her family played a role in her being overweight in the first place.
This. I struggled and struggled with my weight during Jr high and high school. Got to college and dropped to literally half of my size. Kept it off until covid and life resulted in me living with my family again. After gaining back 50lbs I now realize the role family plays in weight loss and weight control
Yup, that's what I thought as well. Also, the audacity in her sister believing this personal success would be about her... Sounds like golden child ish to me.
My granddaughter is moh at her friends wedding. They’ve been friends all their lives. My granddaughter colours her hair,bright colours. Her friend asked if she could grow it out for the wedding. Because they’re besties she also said if the answer was no, she’d still want her as moh. My granddaughter said of course she’d do it, it would be good for her hair to have a rest anyway. That’s how mature friends behave guys
When we had our ceremony, we batted around several ideas in regards to food. We and most of our family/friends had very limited funds. We finally came up with an idea that ended up being amazing. We did a potluck, with a twist. Bring a dish to share and give us the recipe as the gift. We ended up with a large variety of foods and a wonderful recipe binder that has all those foods in it. A truly special wedding present and memories.
Yes!!! One of the best weddings I went to was potluck. The invitations said “in lieu of a gift please bring [x dish]” and the groom’s uncle did a spit roast. It was such a great icebreaker, too, talking about who made what, and what the favs were. It was over 15 years ago and I think about it regularly!
I used to be the girl who was ‘one of the guys ‘ in our friend group, we were once all single and going out every weekend to pubs and clubs. Then everyone intermingled and there are mostly couples in the group now. Over a few years I went through a transformation, lost some weight, fresh hair do, skin care, dressing to match my confidence on a night out etc. Now all the girls in the group are treating me differently and making it clear they think I’ve done this to try and snare their men. I no longer feel these are my friends because apparently once you make an effort for yourself, it actually means you’re a threat to existing relationships and out to steal everyone’s BFs...
These people are horrible. Even if you did this ludicrous thing of trying to ensnare the men by taking care of yourself- /s, how exactly are these men not responsible for their own marriages and wives?!
I was always " the single gal". I was treated like the wolf in the hen house. I was being myself and I would never "steal" a man. If he cheats/strays once, he will do it again.
Your former friends did not think you were a threat when you appeared "dowdy" by their standards. But, when you started to take care of yourself, your extra attractiveness coupled with the fact you still had the freedom to go out and play the field so to speak aroused their jealousy and possibly any insecurities they had. Plus, it is also possible those girls' men may have started to notice you too and possibly commented positively about your transformation which, again, brought out their women's insecurities. Congrats on your transformation. Be the butterfly and leave these girls behind.
Girl focus on beingg friends with the dudes. I was in that place before ( BUT I WAS DATING MY NOW HUSBAND!!). His friends are my friends too and with weight issues (gaining is hard and losing is way too easy) they know about they would encourage me i saw many a girlfriend come and go and the ones that stayed were the ones that encouraged me as well! I focused on being a good friend and not crossing any lines (to near malicious compliance "i cant do that bud if i buy you something ill hear it from gfsname later"). Do you. Keep up the work. And if it gets to bother you too badly go to their men and ask "i dont wanna have problems with you all or them nor do i wish problems for you. Is there something ive done to offend them?" By being respectful any bitchy answer they have can be met with "oh lol guess i was just misreading the vibe bro! Tell her i said hi!" Or " im sorry? I was trying to ask respectfully because i wish to fix any issues" and youll be the bigger person. It may also prove/disprove your feelings and open the boys' eyes up to how rude theyve(their girls) been to you
@@RoSez888 bros complimentingg women they see as bros tend to cause jealousy unintended, thats very true. It is possible they have praised or said happiness for your improvement and the women took offense or misunderstood it. Ive seen too many chicks go crazy over a guy praising a female friend out of friendship and not flirting. You make really good points here.
I got married while I was in the Air Force and stationed on the other side of the country. Because of this my fiance (now husband of 19 years), his sister and my sister all pulled together to get everything ready for our wedding. I had 2 weeks of leave to come home, get married and have a honeymoon. My sister and I went dress shopping the day I got home. The first dress I tried on was the one my sister picked out. It fit perfectly and I loved it! It didn't need any alterations, just a cleaning. My husband and I got married in my sister's backyard, my grandmother brought tons of flowers from her nursery for the day and my sister and her family decorated the backyard beautifully. Everyone brought a food dish to share that we set up buffet style. My husband's sister bought the wedding cake as a gift for us. And we handed out disposable cameras as our families arrived so they could take pictures if they wanted to. It was a low budget wedding that everyone contributed to in one way or another. I wouldn't trade that day for anything. Every year on our anniversary I still send out a little text to family members, thanking them for their specific contribution on our wedding day!
That sounds like a dream wedding! And I love the way you still honor their efforts on your anniversary. I truly don't understand why people feel the need to make such a special day so stressful for themselves (and their loved ones!). I want to be relaxed enough to laugh when something inevitably goes wrong and have the time and energy to enjoy being with all the people who are dear to our hearts. I'm not going to remember what the napkins looked like or whether the decorations were perfect; I'm going to remember being with my partner and the people I love.
I love the disposable camera idea so much! Back in 2002 my friends mom did that for his bar mitzvah! It was so cool to see everyone's different viewpoint and to see what moments they captured! 🥰
That sounds like a wedding I would have picked instead of a court house wedding if I had thought of it. Sounds like a perfect wedding. Small intimate wedding with family & close friends. I bet it was beautiful! So sweet on your anniversary you still thank everyone.
My mom used to be the "fat" sister in her family (she has 4 sisters) and while everyone else was getting normal gifts for Xmas or bdays, she always only got candy but at the same time they shamed her for being overweight (she was not fat or anything just more on the chubby side). It messed her up so bad, that she developed a eating disorder as a teenager and stopped eating completely (she went from L to S within a year) until one uncle (the only one in the entire family) talked to her and said 'if you keep going like this, you' ll die'. That woke her up a bit and from then on she tried to live as healthy as she could but even now with 63 she has a disturbed relationship to eating. It's so sad. She looks great. She always did and always will but she does not see that 😕
I also use to be the "fat sister" and I lost a bunch of weight and developed an eating disorder and almost died inwas in denial until I almost died and was in ICU. My grandparents were very harsh about my weight and picked on me but picked on my brothers and male cousins for being so thin but I was the only one who hated myself for what I was. It's 9 years after I developed anorexia and I still struggle especially around the holidays I don't want to eat especially in front of my family and friends so yea family can truly mess you up.
Exactly! My grandparents were brutal to my mom for being FAT, while her measurements were 36-22-35. She was so messed up, she messed up my sister & I. No matter how hard my sis & I tried, we messed up our kids. At 4 my niece said she had to go to the bathroom, why?... to throw up so she didn't get fat like you [me] & [her] mom. She was in therapy by the end of the week. It didn't help. So sad that at least 3 generations back caused twisted problems a full hundred years later!
Ugh I can relate to this so hard. My ex once had given me shit about the amount of sugar I ate to the point that I no longer ate anything sweet in the house. What did he get me for christmas? A box of chocolates.........
My brother tragically passed away during the pandemic. He was obviously young and completely unexpected. A lot of people couldn’t come to his funeral. I was constantly questioned if I was mad at them by others. I was suprised by this. To be honest, he passed on our deceased mother’s birthday. My father and I couldn’t even remember who was or wasn’t there. I certainly was not mad at anyone who couldn’t make it.
The MIL of my best friend, turned up at the wedding, in a white dress! Everyone was horrified, but the photographer whispered in the brides ear "photoshop, honey". So everyone at the wedding laughed at the pathetic MIL, and in all the photos, she appeared to have been wearing pink, (which looked brilliant, as the rest of the wedding party was in shades of sea-blue)! Result!!
As an amateur artist, that story about the live painting makes me so mad! And Charlotte is absolutely right! One painting can take months, or even a year or two to complete, depending on how important it is and how detailed! The shortest time that I've ever finished a painting was about 4 weeks, while the longest took me almost a year. I doubt I'll ever have the skill to do live paintings, and I have massive respect for people who do. That's years and years of study and practice put in to mastering their craft!
I was the fat friend, and my closest friend at the time couldn’t be happy for me. Always making back handed comments about me being too skinny, or I looked better with more weight on me. It was like she wasn’t okay with me being thinner than her for the first time in our lives. Like I was just taking care of my health 🤷♀️
Same....my friend in nursing school was pissed I was trying so hard to lose weight after my 2nd kid....mind u she is big for health reasons I was big because of hormonal problems plus massive weight gain after 2 kids....I had gained 125 pounds.....so I literally researched the Atkins diet took NOTES on it and she told me I was starving myself and effectively ostracized me from everyone in class....I had ppd then and only had help thro Jesus himself.....she was very pissed I wasnt fat anymore....like my whole pregnancy her and the other tried to feed me bad shit all the time.....realizing tonight just how bad I've been taken advantage of my whole life
My best friend has always been bigger than me and she would call me a skinny bitch sometimes especially when we were getting ready for something. It took years of that to finally say something to her and ask her to stop, cause I didn’t like it. The only things I’ve ever said about her was how beautiful she was and that’s all I got from her. I’m just glad she doesn’t make that comment anymore but damn it hurt my feelings lol
@ 11:10 “Can people start treating artists like the people they are and value their work?” THANK YOU! I am a stained glass artist, Everyone asks me to make them something, for free, because they really love stained glass! One, it is a dying art. Two, glass takes things like copper to make red, that is pricey! All of the chemicals and tapes and solders and time! No! I cannot spend weeks on a piece and hundreds of dollars on glass, and give it to you! Just thanks person!
When my overweight younger sister lost over a hundred pounds and took my place as being the "skinny sister" I was so freaking happy for her. She looks stunning, feels great about herself, and is still the amazing person she has always been. As for the rest of the bridezillas: it is literally ONE day of your life. Have fun and just go with it. By acting like this, you're ruining the wedding for everyone, including yourself. Focus on having a great marriage rather than a perfect wedding.
The only two times I went off on anyone before my wedding was when one of my bridesmaids kept saying at my bachelorette party that it was going to rain the day of my wedding. I asked her several time to stop but she JUST. KEPT. SAYING IT. So I finally turned around and threatened to leave her on the side of the road and she'd have to walk back to my apartment if she said it one more time(this was after about the tenth time she said it and I'd ask her to stop). The other time was right as I was leaving the bridal suite and dad's wife stopped me to tell me that I invited my half-brother(my dad's son) to the wedding and that it made her uncomfortable. I said, well he's my brother and family so of course he'd be here. She replied, "well I don't really consider him family." I gently put my hand on her shoulder and said, "now you know how I feel about you." And walked out of the bridal suite. Made for an interesting night after that 😂
I had a friend of 20 years call me a c##t and cut me out of her life because I cancelled travelling internationally to go to her sister’s wedding 1 week before the wedding. I needed an emergency procedure on my spine after an accident and wasn’t allowed to travel for 3 weeks post surgery. I told them as soon as I found out and apologised profusely for the late cancellation. It still blows my mind though. It wasn’t even her wedding and I’m still in contact with her sister though. We get along really well 😂
I personally believe that there are 3 things no one should ever apologize for: - following your dreams - doing the right thing - trying to better yourself (this includes getting your health in check whether it's physical or mental)
Things I've learned: 1. If they are going to be overdramatic about a one day event, they are going to be overdramatic about everything else and will sap your sanity. 2. If they are willing to kick a person out of the wedding party over something minor, they aren't your friend and you are wasting your time with them. 3. If I ever fall for a girl like these bridezillas, please shoot me.
@Stefania I don't think so. Usually they have their moments before that, people are just so in love they will not pay it enough attention. There's still a chance to call off the wedding if her true colours show during the engagement period. However, I think you can reveal a bridezilla before proposal if you ask her about her dream wedding. From these stories, it seems they don't know how to be subtle about it.
My sister was a complete bridezilla. I could write a novel, but I was told that I couldn’t sit in an aisle seat because my afro hair would be a distraction when she walked down the aisle.
This needs context. If she had a photographer and specific pictures she wanted and was asking everyone with more muted colors and shorter people etc sit close to the aisle so they blurred more easily or whatever I could understand it. But I bet she just wished she could have your hair
@@laurynholling2309 it wasn’t about photos she thought it was too distracting and was worried it would get into the aisle (my fro is a loose Afro and isn’t one of those giant Afros (not that there is anything wrong with giant Afros. They look cute. Just needed to provide that detail for context)
The cavity bridezilla seems to have forgotten there’s this handy little tool called Adobe Photoshop. It can work magic and if the photographer knows his/her tools they will know how to fix this issue.
Wow, i did not think someone would take that seriously. Let me tell you: I look like i look, the good parts and the bad parts, and if someone who calls me friend would go behind my back and photoshop me, I would be fucking angry. Thats the worst kind of bodyshaming!
@@endlessstudent3512 They aren't photoshopping a birthmark or something that is part of the person, they are photoshopping a cavity, a temporary feature that is eventually going to have to be treated or pulled completely anyway.
I know what it is to be plagued with bad front teeth. I fixed it since, but at the time I just avoided smiling or I put my hand in front of mouth. The future MOH don't want to smile either imo. It's very embarrassing, why would she purposely smile with her teeth out on the pictures? The bride is worried for nothing. The poor girl will be careful until she can fix her teeth
I wasn't stressed at all for my wedding. My mom thought I was a little too laid back. Reception was at a local firehall, food cost about $5000, my cousin was photographer, multiple family members did video, my dress was $300 and my grandmother did all the alterations. It was a beautiful ceremony at my church and awesome reception. My focus was the marriage. Relax, have fun, the wedding is just one day.
The total amount I spent on my wedding was about $4,500. I made the food(sandwiches), the punch(no alcohol due to the amount of religious people and I happen to respect boundaries), and our venue was only $200 because my husband was the night time security officer. The punch was cherry limeade and quite popular. The only thing I did not like was my hair style, but since hair and makeup was done for free by one of my bridesmaids sister I just kept quiet and politely thanked her. Yes, weddings are stressful, but you can actually be nice even if things weren’t like you hoped. Just try to relax people! I had a dress that made me feel like a queen, the cake of my dreams, an amazing photographer, and we all had a nice time.
As the fat sister/friend, etc., I can attest to the fact then when/if you lose weight, the people close to you are definitely NOT always supportive. Also, I feel like the algorithm has you here because the fountain of content for this series is NEVER-ENDING! hahahaha
My mother and sister followed me around chanting "I hate you because you're so skinny" over and over. I just do not understand this attitude, but it seemed perfectly sane to them.
This is so true. I lost 115 lbs about 10 years ago and had many relationships change. My work BFF even started telling other coworkers that I was either bulimic or had gotten gastric bypass because there’s no way I could’ve lost the weight on my own. It was extremely hurtful.
Oh, that poor woman- actually feeling the need to ask AITA for just losing weight! For her sister to react like that, you can see what her childhood must have been like, living with a narcissistic sibling ☹️
growing up in the trama of that awful family may well have caused the poor girl to balloon up in the first place. Getting some separation from the family and a healthier lifestyle likely helped her lose 100 lbs in a year.
Many years ago I was invited to a wedding. I happily accepted, even though I’m gay and was told I couldn’t bring a + one, because I’d bring a guy, and her family “wouldn’t understand”. Then it got more stupid. When the family started getting replies, their story was, they got too many “yeses” back. Then because I was the group from work, we were told that since family and friends were more important than coworkers, we wouldn’t be invited to the dinner part of the reception. The coworkers would have to hang out in the lounge, buy our own drinks and food, and wait for dinner to conclude. Then we’d be able to join the rest of the reception. Oh WAIT! All of a sudden about 90 minutes after dinner was to begin, the bride appeared in the lounge and sadly told us that the room the reception was taking place in was a bit smaller than they anticipated, and she would hang out with her coworkers in the lounge for 30 minutes in order to take in the beauty of her gown, and then rejoin the good party. She also gladly accepted the gifts her “nasty” coworkers brought. I don’t think I ever got a thank you note either.
This is partly why if anyone was mad enough to marry me, I'd insist we do the legal stuff with a few witnesses then just have a party with a buffet that evening with the rest. No need for all this formalities and schedules, first dances or speeches. Simply "Hi, we got married! Enjoy the party, take a few photos if you want and have a good one!" Simple.
I would want only me and my partner, and plan the day for ourselves celebrating. It's better to go out to dinner with your close family after all this and treat them, maybe a small party that's it. Parties=stress
Hi T. That's exactly what we did. Both second-timers, we got married on a stunning Scottish beach, just us, the celebrant and the witnesses (provided by wedding company) and it was absolutely perfect. We had already invited everyone to our 'engagement party' to be held a couple of weeks later so everyone turned up, thinking they were going to toast our engagement. That gave us enough time to edit a short video of the wedding (again, the wedding company organised it) and add music. The venue had a screen and the video played .... "Surprise! Welcome to our wedding!!"....and we walked into the room. Everyone loved it! We loved it most because it was exactly what WE wanted; little stress, low cost (although that wasn't the main motive), personal, intimate, solely about us. Too many weddings are about the MiL or MoH or "No children" and someone brings their tantrum-prone 3 year old. No thank you!!! It's YOUR wedding. if you're not doing exactly what YOU want, you're doing it wrong.
That's what my brother and SIL did. They got married, at our equivalent of city hall, with close family and some friends. This was on monday morning, because it's free then. On saturday they rented out a pub and had a very chill party for everyone. They eventually got gifted more money than what everything cost. Wedding done right!
But it's tradition to give away tens of thousands of hard earned dollars to people to give you a mediocre/boring party!!! What are you monsters going to target next!?! Diamonds!?! How are they going to sell one of the most common gemstones in the world for the highest prices that immediately drops 50% in value, if they lose engagement ring "tradition"?!? Terrible!! Doesn't anyone think of con artists' feelings and needs?!?
I've definitely experienced "friend" loss. Almost IMMEDIATELY after finally kicking my loser, physically abusive husband out, I had no more friends. None. The neighborhood mom's that had playdates with our three kids, gone. The people we had dinner parties and game nights, gone. I was already traumatized and physically mangled from the marriage and being shunned really gave my self esteem an additional hit that took years to move past.
As someone who has a cavity on a front tooth, it’s extremely self esteem killing and if my “best friend” didn’t invite me to their wedding simply because of that, saying it would ruing the pictures I would definatly feel very hurt and mostlikely developed more of a complex to hide my smile after that, even more than I do now. I hope she didn’t do that to her friend
@@arianebolt1575 I was living with a guy who had all of the control in the relationship and didn’t care enough about my health to get me in to see the dentist, even when he had a thousand dollars in his wallet, I didn’t have transportation of my own, I would ask him and he would say he would but never did after years. But I’m in a better living situation now and got into the dentist and soon I’m going to go back in to get the cavity taken care of. It’s not that I didn’t want to, I didn’t have the means or ability to do it on my own
I'm from a large Hispanic family and I've never seen anyone ask for money for their Wedding food. Then again, we are really big on hospitality and making sure everyone is well fed so asking people to pay for food at a special occasion would have sounded rude when I was growing up. We do however invite others to bring bulk side dishes if they would like because more food is always welcome. You always have those Aunts or Abuelita's that know a great gift is to roll up their sleeves and cook up hundreds of homemade tamales, empanadas, or green chile stew...and they don't do "Plus 1", they do "are your friends hungry?"
The girl who didn't want her husband-to-be child coming to wedding bc he's rude to her....I completely understand that! Here me out, my now, ex-husband's daughter was 3 yrs old when we met. She was very rude towards me, didn't listen to me, etc. My ex never put his foot down with this type of behavior and it progressively got worst as the years went on, 7 years later, we are divorced and his daughter is rude to the new lady in his life. My point: Her future husband needs to step in and help fix this problem. It can get worst the older the child gets. At 5, the mom is definitely coaching him, but it can end up being a behavior that doesn't stop, even when the child gets to an age where they know the difference between what's wrong and what's right.
I had to think about the story in the video..... the mom is coaching the kid, so It's not the kids fault (Who knows what all she is telling him). So my next thought is, what will the mom tell the kid to do at the wedding to ruin it?! Yes, the Father needs to talk to the son about not listening to the mom as far as telling him to be rude to his GF/wife, period (Also suggest family therapy). But he needs to wait till day of the wedding to tell son, he will NOT put up with any rude behavior that day period, so son doesn't tell mom which would give her time to think of other things. Then father needs to agree to assign a relative to be ready to pick up his son and haul him out of church/ reception the moment he starts causing a scene. Might need to have a babysitter on hand if needed, in case they need to send son to time out for a while. Edit to add: Father needs to document all the times his son tells them the mother told him to do such and such, or mother gave him permission to do it etc... then the father has ammo if he ever decides to fight for custody on basis of mother trying to use parental alienation against father and soon to be step mother. The GF just needs to be patient and kind, any outbursts from son she needs to just let father deal with him till the boy comes around. As long as she doesn't push the kid away, or hold a grudge and retaliate, she'll eventually grow on him.
I was the child to my stepmom, it can get better & when the child grows up our eyes open. My dad stayed out of it growing up n we both hated it. But my stepmom is the best person I know & first person I call about anything now.
100 % true. My hubby's ex never stopped neither did her son. My hubby tried to stop it but this chick is a hurricane of hatred and bitterness which has continued for 8 years. The son has zero relationship with his dad because if her BS. The daughter was smarter but sadly has fallen victim to her mother's bs and it's sad that the kids suffer.
Even if she didnt tell people her sister was fat. And who goes around saying their sister is fat? I do think she got used to being the thinner one. Now that she is smaller than her its threatening.
My mother was mad at me because I was married, happy with a girl and a boy. She said it was bad all this good came to me because my sister was married three times, had 4 boys and very unhappy. She said it should be the other way around. Thanks mom.
Your mum should be happy for you, and because you've had it good doesn't mean your sister can't do the same. It'll probably just take some time for her, but she doesn't have to be married to be happy. If anything this means she'll have more freedom, be able to put herself first and do the things she couldn't do in a relationship.
Apparently, by fae logic, Maleficent was perfectly in her rights to curse that child because the king and queen were absurdly rude to her. Had they properly invited her, she would have brought a really nice gift, maybe gotten the three other fae there to put the effort into even nicer gifts for little Aurora to compete. But instead, they snubbed her and when she gave them a chance to walk it back, they doubled down. At that point, she's almost required to dole out punishment to them.
I wasn't a Bridezilla on my wedding day but one of my bridesmaids was a bridesmaidzilla. My cousin has very severe psoriasis that literally covers 98% of her body from scalp to her toes. My cousin is VERY self conscious about her psoriasis and wears anything to cover it all year long so when we were shopping for bridesmaids dresses I was looking for a dress that my cousin would be comfortable in but the rest of the bridesmaids would wear a different style from her. Well one of my bridesmaids had the audacity to say ' she doesn't understand why I'm giving my cousin special treatment just because she has a disgusting disease and she would be embarrassed at her own wedding if she had a bridesmaid with them nasty disgusting white pouches in her picture' needless to say I educated her ass about psoriasis and kicked her out of my bridal party with no hesitation. Idgaf that she spent hundreds of dollars on stuff for herself for my wedding and went off on her plus her family when she went on social media to act like a victim and she did nothing wrong but what really did it for me is when her family defended her statements about my cousin and psoriasis like what tf is wrong with people 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Psoriasis can just form anytime throughout your life, is hereditary, does not care race you are and can NOT be cured but is manageable with the proper meds that works for you ( psoriasis meds are very very very expensive and most insurance do not cover the meds).
5 days before my wedding, tried on the wedding dress again (I thought I'd gained weight), it tore. 3 days before the wedding the venue ( that was owned by my bosses business partner) called and said that the limo I hired had broken down and it wouldn't be fixed in time. They called the day after that and said they'd had a few fights at recent weddings and wanted door staff present, and that I now needed to pay for, I said no. I didnt kick off. I didn't scream and shout at people. I did go back to mums and have a 10 minute cry, but then I put on my big girl pants and got it sorted, like you do. But I did kinda say if 1 more thing goes wrong, we're gonna call it off cos I was getting major bad omen vibes. Well, dress got fixed, another carwas hired, the door staff were present but the venue paid their wage, and it went ahead without any major issues (except a row with my dad in the evening for being rude to other (disabled) guests), and then, almost 8 years to the day later, I found out hubby had been cheating for a year. So, in hindsight, I probably should have listened to the old gut about 3 strikes being a bad omen and cancelled it. Oh well. Lol
The weight loss story hurts. The bride literally was accusing her sister like she was trying to overshadow her wedding by losing weight. Like, the process of losing 100 pounds in less than a year is traumatic enough. She didn't "conveniently" wait until sisters wedding to announce it, she didn't want to make a big deal of it to begin with otherwise she would have said something!
My mother has always loved disaster movies, "Because it brings out people's true characters." Like, how you see the guy who's a bit of a jerk showing up as the REAL hero, while the charismatic leader falls to pieces, and shoves vulnerable people out of the way so that he can be first in the lifeboats, even if there are enough seats for all. My Mom LOVES that stuff. Weddings and funerals are like disaster movies without the life-and-death situations and body count.
what amuses me is the fact that the "victims" of these bridezillas still want to be in the wedding; or even to be in the bridezillas life. i'm not afraid to cut ties with friends and family who treat me like shit.
What I hate is when someone does something and gets grouped with other family members and I get caught in the crossfire having zero to do with anything, having been not there or liking contact with the evil ones!
Spot on about relationship dynamics changing from weight loss. In college and a few years after, I had this "skinny blonde chic" as a friend (this is what she called herself). She always said that she had the successful body while I had the successful career. I lost 75 pounds and ended up being size 8/10. Wow, she could not handle it. She's been out of my life for almost 20 years, and I do not miss that toxicity. My weight loss also impacted my relationship with my sister. Boy, that brat baby acts like she's taking a lashing on the back when I get a compliment. When I first lost weight, I was actually embarrassed for her. So childish and self-centered.
My second wedding (to the same man I married 30 years ago, we split up then got back together) was just going to be us away getting married in Bali. But for just us it was the same as the register office at home and a meal with immediate family so we chose to pay for that. It was all we could afford. However, people asked if they could come to the register office and we mentioned the meal was just for us, 50 people wanted to come and join us and paid for themselves. Which I loved and was wonderful. We had to budget small, but friends and family wanted to join us and make it all the more special. I loved it for that reason ❤️ I even let my bridesmaids wear whatever they felt comfortable in. As well as guests could be as dressy or casual as they wanted. It was so relaxed and happy and everyone said it was the best time they’d had at a wedding in ages. Win win for everyone ❤️
I love this! You must be a p cool person to have friends who are willing to do this for you ❤ Sounds like you communicated clearly and were open-minded about people's preferences, and it worked out great!
@@marije8562 it was so much better than I could have hoped for. No photographer. Everyone took photos and I gave a bottle of champagne to the person who took my favourite photo. It was so much better than a big wedding that is everyone you’ve not seen in forever. 🤗😘
@@charlottecraddock4194 it was amazing. The day was full of milling about, no schedules, laughter and just love. I think there too much placed on who has the biggest bash and invites who and the best theme etc... it doesn’t make marriage work better or happier. I worry for some couples who start with that expense. Is it really about them or just pomp and ceremony ❤️
My wedding day was very similar. We got engaged young and we're saving up money for a big wedding when I got pregnant. We decided to forgo the big wedding and use the money for the baby, and instead we were just going to go to the courthouse. My mom and my pastor convinced me to have a simple ceremony at my home church, and all of my family got together and paid for the ceremony and reception dinner. Since my brother was okay with us getting married on his birthday, we let him pick out the restaurant for the reception and we paid for his meal. It's such a great feeling when you realize you have a great support system.
Wow that girl losing weight and her parents taking her sister side.... That's sick. I also have lost 100 lbs over the course of this year but thankfully my family is happy for me.
I can totally relate to OP. I lost a very good friend (or so I use to think) because I lost over 100 lbs and looked fabulous! She was so jealous she refused to come to my wedding when I met the man of my dreams.
So sorry that happened to you. May I ask, did she admit to being jealous and ditching you wedding out of jealousy or did she just make it obvious? I just can't imagine the audacity.
I've just had a "friend" of 4 years go completely vicious towards me because I've made positive changes and started standing up for myself. We both have mental illness, and I've often ignored his derogatory comments about me because of his schizophrenia. In the last 3 years, I've been in therapy and take medication for my severe depression and I'm doing much better. It seems the more confident I become, and the more positive changes I make (I've quit drinking and using weed entirely) the angrier he became. He often put me down because of my southern accent (I'm originally from Texas) and he's called me a racist on several occasions when HE made an offensive racist joke and I told him it wasn't funny. The last time I saw him, we were in his truck coming back up the mountain from a shopping trip. We both live in a small mountain community. I saw a truck pulled off the road I recognized as belonging to one of my newer neighbors, so I asked him to stop and see if the guy needed help because I thought I recognized him. We stopped, the guy was waiting for his overheated truck to cool down but had water, so we left. I told my "friend" that the gentleman is the new guy who lives near me, I recognized his face when we pulled over. My "friend said, "You just think all Mexicans look alike because you're racist!" That really pissed me off, so I told him that either he thinks I'm racist, or he said that to hurt me, and neither of those are acceptable so I don't want to continue our friendship. Besides, I never said anything about the gentleman's nationality, but I did mention that he was handsome. He got very angry, said he was "just joking", so I asked him to explain why that would be funny? He just got angrier. Bye Felicia! I've blocked his number and Facebook account. That was months ago, and he's still telling anyone who will listen what a terrible person I am. I see what he's doing, this is classic narcissist gaslighting; making stuff up because he expects me to respond to defend myself. I won't, because I've better things to do. That would only give him validation and attention that he wants. Anyone who believes him is not a person I'd want to be friends with anyway. Now he's saying that driving to my house caused $3000 damage to his truck because my dirt road is rough. Funny, my 17 year old Hyundai car handles it fine, so not my problem if he doesn't know how to drive his truck! Anyway, he hasn't even been here in 4 months, so I don't see how he can blame damage done by his poor driving on me. He also blames me for his previous truck catching fire and burning up. It was caused by a rat's nest in the engine, which he claims must have happened during the hour or so he was parked at my ranch! He lives in an RV parked at a heavily wooded campground, where wood rats are a frequent problem. 🙄
That person is not your friend. He is treating you like a punching bag for his negative emotions. Then because you were so down on yourself he found an easy scapegoat, you couldn't and didn't fight back against his abuse. It's just like any abusive relationship, they look for people who are "weak", which really just means someone that hates themself enough to take the abuse. Now you have turned yourself around, which is absolutely amazing and you are a warrior for yourself now! All that guy wants is someone to be mean to to make himself feel better, and you are too strong to be that person anymore. You are absolutely awesome for helping yourself get better, and you deserve friends that shower you with positivity, not anger and insults, venting AT you is not the same as venting TO you. You are a stronger pesrson now and cutting him out of your life is even more proof of that. You go girl!!!
@@EEsmalls What an amazing post. I read the initial post and sat here trying to think of what to say and keep it positive and encouraging. Unfortunately, I've developed some cognitive dysfunction from 40+ years of chronic illness and pain so was sitting here stumped and getting miffed at my inability to express myself anymore. *Then* I read your comment. Perfect! Thank you
I had my own bridezilla moment with my 2nd oldest sister years ago. I had to have emergency surgery to remove my gallbladder after being in the hospital for a week waiting for the infection to subside. Ended up leaving the hospital with drainage tubes and was told to stay in bed. Because of all this, I was not able to go to bridesmaid dress fitting. Our oldest brother got involved and my ex husband was accused of causing the gallstone attack and my sister accused me of doing this on purpose. As I said, I had drainage tubes sticking out of my body and needless to say, the dress would have been ruined. Then, a couple months later, at the wedding, I had to be pinned into the dress because of all the weight I lost, and was accused of losing weight to spite her( I have NEVER gotten along with this sister and I'm sure I was only asked for apperances). She was always thinner than me and I was always the fat sister and my family did judge my looks ALOT. She would tease me relentlessly about my weight at any opportunity, but I was willing to put that aside for the wedding. You just can't please some people,huh? 😊 P.S. - I forgot to mention that when I announced my engagement, she rushed to announce her wedding because my favorite brother asked her how it felt to be an OLD MAID ( Yeah, she made her fiance propose)! BTW, they were DIVORCED A YEAR AND A HALF LATER!!
I just had my gallbladder removed on the 11th. It wasn't an emergency like yours but if I had left it in any longer it might have become like that. I can't imagine how much worse it must have felt with an infection. Your sister sounds like a garbage human. Obviously an EMERGENCY surgery isn't something that can be planned and done on purpose.I hope you and your husband are going strong and I'm glad her marriage didn't last.
I almost died from that and ended up in the I.C.U. unit. The pain unbelievable. I had been hospitalized before but didn’t get the surgery. The last attack was life threatening my organs were infected. It’s no laughing matter. Sorry but your family not too sensitive. All these dramas that families choose to impose on others is so petty and the divorce is proof!
Friends of ours got married, and we had to buy tickets for our meals, plus cash bar, plus bring a gift. I was talking with the bridesmaid and explained that we’d be delighted to witness the wedding, and stay for 1 drink to toast the couple, but between gas, parking, buying a new outfit (semi formal required), and the cost of the drink we could not afford the additional cost of the meal and a gift from the registry. Tried to have a discussion with the bridesmaid about other gift alternatives only to be shot down. We were told that if we could not afford a gift from the registry and the meal ticket then don’t bother showing up at all, she’ll change our rsvp to unable to attend. I saved the conversation, showed hubby and filed it away. We sent a congrats card and left it at that. The bridesmaid contacts me the day after the wedding asking a) why didn’t we come, b) if we knew we weren’t coming why didn’t we send a gif, and c) why wasn’t there money in the card we did send. I asked her if the couple was aware of her reaching out like this and of her dis-inviting us to the wedding. She claimed we weren’t dis-invited and that they were both fully aware of her actions and stood behind her 100%. Told her that this was a conversation I’ll have with the couple at a later date. Couple calls a week later and asks me why I made all these promises to the bridesmaid then didn’t follow through on any of them. They were under the impression that since hubs and I have decent jobs we were going to gift them something like $1500 (pay for the honeymoon), plus the meal tickets, plus a big ticket item from their registry. I sent the convos that I saved and asked if they really were 100% on board with the bridesmaid’s strong arm tactics. Didn’t hear from them for another week. Finally heard back… seems the bridesmaid thought I was their golden goose. I have a designer purse, (that I saved 6 months to buy 7 yrs ago), I wear new pricey runners, (I have orthopaedic running shoes, my clinic has a place that custom makes shoes), my hair is always dyed, (my cousin is a colourist and does it for free), I have fancy computer equipment, (I have some disabilities).. (btw, dragon speak is amazing software just saying)…. So all of this to say: maybe rethink your venue and menu if you feel that you need your guests to pay for their own meals, or else be prepared for the guests to bring their own food. Every single event, since that wedding, that states I need to pay extra for the meal, I advise that I have serious food allergies and will bring my own food to be safe. (This way, I can have a strawberry and salmon salad, a shrimp cocktail, and a steak with baked potato.)
Wow! I can speak only from the point of view of my culture, but I would be too embarrassed to expect guests to pay for meals. Sometimes close families and friends do a potluck meal and family and friends will contribute in other ways. That's different because it's sweet, and loving, and comes from the heart. However, when you're selling tickets, or pressuring the guests in similar ways, then NO. If it's too expensive to have a large celebration, then you should have a smaller one.
Bridezilla: “How dare you lose weight and take care of your health! You are trying to upstage me!” If I were OP, I would been like “Sorry you’re offended by me having the audacity to lose weight and take better care of my health. I can just not come to the wedding if it will make you feel better.”
I wouldn't even give them that choice, I'd just remove myself and go home at that point, she's probably spent enough of her life feeling like shit, doesn't need to come from the family too
I’d reword with. “Sorry you’re offended by me having the audacity to lose weight and take better care of my health. I cannot go to the wedding if you’d think that’ll make you’ll pretty… though. I can’t change the reality.”
I don't know about the second one. It's messed up that he probably can't attend the wedding but I mean, having CPS getting involved for what sounds like false allegations is pretty extreme. And I'm not blaming the kid at all. The mom is a terrible person for using him as a weapon in her petty rampage. But if she's willing to coach him on saying such things, I would not put it past her to coach him in ruining the wedding in some way. It can be a simple command like "Throw juice on the bride bc it will be funny." I kind of see where she's coming from on that. Tough situation.
I would let the child be there. Let the child make a scene. Show the child that you aren't trying to take their father away. The child's behaviour can't ruin the wedding but your reaction can be the foundation of the new family. My minister says my husband and I are the most gracious couple ever because our response to having our reception flooded was to provide extra tips for the volunteers because they worked hard dealing with the water while we continued to celebrate. Being gracious with the groom's child seems like a no brainer if the marriage is the important thing.
@@pattygould8240 I'm sure you are a gracious couple, but I fail to see the similarities between having a flood at your wedding and a groom/father trying to navigate a family dispute so significant that CPS had to be involved. Your situation was an accident; there was no chance for a preemptive choice. His is. And it's a decision with that puts deeply rooted relationship dynamics at stake. There are a lot of emotions being thrown around and personally as a social worker who has seen dysfunctional families at play, I can tell you things are far more complex than advising everyone involved to just be gracious
For the meal ticket question, I knew a couple who invited some close friends and family and church group to their wedding and wanted everyone to pay for their own meal ticket. They basically said that they didn't want or expect any wedding gifts, and their only request was for each guest to pay for their meal. They didn't have a registry and the wedding was super low key. I think a big part of it was that they weren't entirely sure how many people were going to come since they were free we inviting various guests and their respective families. I thought that it was sweet and no one took offense.
My sister lost a lot of weight, not for my wedding, but at the same time. I was so happy for her. Also, my huz had a 5 year old. Since i didn't want kids I was relieved. It was weird having to deal with a kid, but I figured it it's about your husband, if they have a kid, you must adapt.
Several days before the wedding we had been snipping at each other for no apparent reason and I took it to mean that we were in a fight. (We weren't but were extremely nervous) Then I got my period a few days early and I was afraid to tell him because in my messed up bridal braid "he won't want to marry me if we can't have sex on our wedding night." Uh - fast forward 29+ years and we can laugh about it and how crazy it all was. So glad we were able to get past all the crazy and are now happily wed with four nearly adult kids.
In support of the woman who wanted to sew her dress…when I make a dress, or anything, no one can tell that I made it myself! NO ONE! There are many, many of us who sew beautifully! Don’t assume that someone doesn’t know their craft! I made a Jr. Bridesmaids and Flower Girls dress for my two daughters for my SIL wedding. I had several people ask me where I had purchased them, they wanted to purchase them also!
For the sister who lost 100lbs. Does your family have a history of favoring your sister and making you feel like 2nd place? I’m guessing this is likely. I don’t know a single parent who wouldn’t be thrilled that one of their children made lifestyle choices that would add years and quality to their life.
If you make positive changes in your life, and your friends act like it is a personal attack against them, then consider: they are not your friends, they are using you as a prop, either to make themselves look better, or to make themselves feel better about their own issues.
When I got married the 1st time, I was 18 almost 19 hence not being married to him anymore lol, we didn't have a large budget. My soon to be SIL knew how to make flower arrangements so she made the flowers for the reception, my bouquet, and the candelabra. As for the reception, I most certainly think it should be included in part of the wedding planning. You just have to work with the budget you have. My mom,.aunt's, SIl were really good cooks and It was FAR from fancy but they all pitched in and made a buffet meal. We had chips, veggies, dip, meatballs, stuff like that to eat, and had punch, sweet tea and sodas to drink. I had a really pretty cake was that was yummy. We went to church with a lady that made cakes so that was her gift to us. We got married in the church we were members of, my SIL also played the piano and sang, my future FIL married us. So, yeah there are ways to make it work IF you want it. I did however buy my wedding dress from my cousin's then wife 😧🤔 shoulda thought that one through 🤣🤣 oh my Dad was in the Army so he had some of his his soldiers come and they stood at attn and after the ceremony my hubby and I walked under their crossed I believe it was rifles. :)
I went to my friend's wedding via livestream. My roommate had mishandled the bills and the electricity got cut off. It took the entire amount of the plane ticket I had saved to go to my friend's wedding to get the electricity turned back on. Thus, me living in Oregon, I could not attend a wedding in TN. We made it work out. I dressed up and everything. And just sat in my office hair in my room and attended via skype. BTW I am still friends with the newlyweds, but I ditched the roomie for someone who can actually adult.
Hi Charlotte, I'm Lisa! My daughter introduced me to your channel. Loving it and you. Just wanna say something about weddings...When I married my honey and I had very little money. We invited our families and friends. We asked people to dress for a small wedding and be ready for fun. We had the ceremony in a small chapel and reception at the local firehouse. There was no alcohol, it was bring your own. Family understood and was okay with it. Well, no money right?! I asked the local Tech/vocational school if they'd make the wedding food (buffet). They were thrilled for the experience. We paid for all the supplies and picked it up the day before. The food was delicious by the way. (The cake looked not so grandiose but tasted wonderful) The firemen heard about our lack of funds and bought a keg of beer and showed up in white shirts, red suspenders and Jean's and served all our guests. They were so generous. We all celebrated our union and laughed and danced to a local DJ. Thirty-four years later, still married and in love. Everyone had a good time and no-one bought gifts they couldn't afford. The real gift was their attendance. My dress was not a bridal gown but suited me and my maid of honor, my sister, wore her favorite dress as did my bridesmaid. No stress, no worries, just love. Wishing you love and a beautiful life!
My mother made the most beautiful burgundy velvet bridesmaid dresses for my sister's wedding that people thought that they had been made by a bridal specialist. My sister was and is still beautiful but on her wedding day she was radiant and her dress was also designed and created by my sister and my mom. I have such a talented family! My other sister is also an excellent seamstress and knowing that they have all the talent in the family is fine with me. I have four sons who wouldn't care if I tried to make their clothes but alas, I have no talent in that direction.
And the chick with the tooth…..she’s more embarrassed about it than the bride would be. I truly hope the bride doesn’t mention it to her, it will only make her feel worse. Trust me, I have horrid teeth due to a rough pregnancy and depression topped off with no dental insurance.
We went through a pile of crap from my mum before our wedding. As we saved and paid for it, it meant we had 100% control and so we had no bridesmaids etc but dressed my best friends daughter up in a dress like mine (she was only around 4 yrs old and our nephew wore a lovely waistcoat (he was 18 moths old). They had special photos with just us so it was an extra special time for them. We even had relatives walk out at the evening do and still had an amazing time. You can’t let stress dictate your thoughts and poor decisions. It’s not worth the hassle. We celebrate 29 years together next year x
My husband and I spent 46 dollars to get married at the JP. We didn't want to deal with all of the drama. We did have a little family BBQ to celebrate with family. It's been 9 years and I still have no regrets about not having a huge wedding.
The first story got me heated. 1) If someone loses weight, and makes healthier choices that’s great I’m trying to do the same as family you should be happy for them. 2) Family should not take sides cause that is where things get out of hand.
Their reaction clearly shows any previous comments they ever made on the sister's weight was never out of concern for health - otherwise they would indeed be happy for her. Disgusting.
Now I understand why we have dedicated community centres and we deck the bride with an awful lot of jewelry so that everyone knows who's wedding it is and nobody can actually upstage the bride. Some of the jewelry is wedding specific, so there's no bridezilla tendency for keeping oneself at the center of attention. And the venue being a neutral zone (not the best man's house for example) doesn't create any problems.
I've been apart of 3 weddings and in all 3 of them, the brides were wonderful. Two of them good friends of mine (one who still remains like a sister), and the 3rd was my sister in law. Having these experiences leave me BAFFLED by Bridezillas. But also entertained 🤣
The person who posted about their groom's 5 year old son made me really sad. When I was 11 I went to visit my mom in Oregon for the Summer. I lived with my dad in California. Because of my age, plus I was a young 11, my mom emotionally manipulated me and I told my dad I wasn't coming back to live with him. And my mom didn't do this because she missed me and wanted to spend time with me, I think she did it because she wanted to prove to herself that I loved her more than I loved my dad. Anyway, my dad got pissed, at me. Hardly talked to me for years and I rarely saw him. He saw it as me rejecting him and nothing else. Yup, I'd really rather live with my mom and her pedophile boyfriend. I'd lived with my mom and this boyfriend before so I knew I wasn't safe but I couldn't go against my mom because I wanted her to love me. What is wrong with adults not seeing children as children?? The one person that didn't want her wedding photos marred by having someone with a bad tooth in them, isn't that an easy fix for a photographer? Of course given the tone of her post she strikes me as one of those people who wouldn't want to pay a photographer what they are worth.
I am so sorry you had to endure that. You in no way deserved that behavior from every adult in your family. I hope you have processed your pain and are living your best life now. Too many adults are really just selfish toddlers inside.
I hope you have a good relationship with your dad now. And about your mom, I really don´t know what to say, it makes me so angry that you had to suffer living with a pedophile because she was just plain selfish.
@@sonjebianca2483 thank you for your kind words. I'm 59 now and while I have done therapy for a long time I don't know if I ever truly processed my childhood. I think the fact that even though I had a relationship in my 20s, he was a slimeball, I've have never had another relationship. But I'm okay with it and I'm content. What I find interesting, is that now that I'm much older, I would like to speak to my mom and dad. I'd like to know what had happened to them and how they felt when I was a child. It wasn't until my 50s, I'm really slow sometimes 🤦♀️, when I realized that my parents would have struggled with their own types of emotions and feelings as I have as an adult. It took me way too long to think of them as individual people and not just parents.
@@Vayeya1 thank you. Both of my parents are dead now. The irony is that the last 10 years, or so, of my mom's life I took care of her. Not to the point that I lived with her and took care of her, I don't think I could of done that. But I handled her finances and I had medical power of attorney and I took her to all of her medical appointments. Eventually I had to move her into Adult Foster Care when she couldn't live alone anymore. I can't say we ever reconciled as she wasn't mature enough for me to ever have that kind of conversation plus she was narcissistic. The odd thing now is that I would like to have serious conversations with each of them just to see if I could understand what life was like for them. 🤷♀️
Weddings are only as stressful as you make them. In the long run, that one day isn't nearly as important as people make it out to be. My wedding was in a public park (you can reserve the gazebo there for free). I got my dress at a second hand dress shop. The decorations were leftovers from my SIL's wedding. And we had maybe 15 - 20 people there. My husband and I still got married. Just as married as someone who spent hundreds of thousands on their wedding. And I barely had to think of anything at all. It was funny, we were all at the park, and my FIL had to run home and get the rings, marriage license, and bouquet. We forgot them at home when we left. It was hilarious.
Hearing these stories and reading comments makes me so glad the one wedding ive been in went off smoothly. It was my sister's wedding. She asked my other sister to be her MOH and asked me afterwards if i was okay with that and if i was mad. I looked at her and said "I really don't want to have all the responsibilities of being a MOH, nor do I have the mental capability to do it right now, plus yall are closer, i am not at all upset". At the time of her wedding i was in college full time, working part time, then volunteered in the church she was getting married in a good bit all on top of being in a relationship. Outside of the relationship, my days were regularly 7 am to anywhere between 9 and 11 pm depending on work and church schedules (i sang in the choir, played in several of the musical ensembles, was very active in the college ministry, etc). I did not have the mental capacity or physical energy to be her MOH. How i survived being a bridesmaid is still beyond me. Hearing stories like this make me terrified for when i get married. Im hoping my future bridesmaids are with me enough to not have any major conundrums that are within their control. However, breakups, fluctuation in appearance, pregnancy, whatever, those dont matter. That stuff is out of control and i refuse to spend my future wedding day stressing about that kinda stuff. I'll work with them if they work with me
the 28-year-old female sister who lost weight is not the a-hole, her family is toxic though. she has been saying that she made healthy a choice throughout the whole freaking year how is she in a hole just because you want to be healthier
I fell in love with a prices if art in 1975 at age 16. It was in the artists home. It was her Master's prices for her Masters of Art degree. "A STUDY IN WHITE," my mother bought it as a housewarming gift from the artist when I bought my house in 2004
When my friend got married it staed in the invite that the fee for the food and drinks was the wedding gift to them. I live in Sweden though, we're a lot less traditional here than in the US where it just seems like SUCH a huge deal. Everyone paid around 50 USD and got a three course meal, wine with that and cake. I'd say that's pretty decent.
I was working 55+ hour weeks when I was planning my wedding. I picked my dress out & the color of my 2 bridesmaids and told my mom to have fun planning & she done fabulous & so glad I didn't have to deal with it.
My daughter got married last year and she catered her own reception and everyone enjoyed it everything was provided for except the alcohol, nonalcoholic drinks were provided if they wanted alcoholic drinks they'd have to pay for it themselves, she even provided vegan/vegetarian options
No wedding is worth destroying relationships and starting off in debt. Figure out what is in your means, and be as creative as you can within it. Don’t be a bridezilla, please! ☺️💗💗💗💗
I agree with the live stream thing. I lost my brother and his wife last year, I live 1500 miles away from the rest of my family. My wife and I could not make it for obvious reason. After asking, the church live streamed the services for those of us could not make it.
I'm terribly sorry for your loss. I'm glad you were able to see the live stream and stay safe. Sending strength, support and love to you and your family.
Right? Usually home made is even better quality. My mother has made some beautiful clothes and has made a dress for an event. It was a lot of work and earned the nickname “pain in the butt” lol. I mean fabric and color choices can make it ugly but actually making it is by no means nasty or tacky. Anymore fabric can cost a lot of money. I quilt and just some of the fabric has cost hundreds of dollars when you buy several yards and it’s $16.99 a yard. It’s been crazy to see how much this hobby costs lol.
At my wedding ceremony we had 2 witnesses, my dress was from a website I ordered the day before (I wasnt even stressed about it) we had a bbq after with about 30 people and it was such a wholesome day and night 🥰 all in all we spent about £200 in total and wouldn't have changed it for anything!
I don't get how weddings could be so stressful. My bride and I just walked into a city hall after booking the time and got married in 30 minutes. There was no stress at all. Our 5-year anniversary is in 3 months.
I think there's a big different between getting married at the city hall and doing the entire wedding event. However I do think it's sad how much people obsesse over the day to the point where they no longer are able to even enjoy it.
We really wish we had done that! My fiancé and I wanted to elope, but our families (a.k.a, my mother!) guilted us into having a big family wedding. The wedding is in 3 weeks and the whole planning process has been nothing short of an ordeal. At least it’ll be over soon!
My dad got married without me knowing and we found out by family. I was a kid. I’m now 37 and even though I’ve healed I can say I was very resentful for a long time about it
On the topic of children: I always hated children until I volunteered to my aunt's friends to babysit her 4 yo boy and 2yo girl. Ever since seeing them daily for those months I absolutely adore them, it's frankly amazing how well you can speak to kids that young as long as you have patience and understand that they will need a lot of explaining. They may be irrational and a pain in the butt, but they are intelligent human beings and if you treat them with the respect any person deserves, they will grow up to be better people.
We asked our guests to pay for their meals instead of a gift as we already had everything we needed and everyone was fine with it and loved the food. It wasn’t expensive for them, it was a buffet and they all commented how great the food was and it saved us from our biggest wedding expense 💗
With the cheating man of honor, and the wedding being at his house, he's using a power play because he controls the venue. So, heres my brainstorm idea: Get a new venue and king the man of honor out! She will be forever greatful that you picked her.
![[안방1열 직캠4K] 베이비몬스터 치키타 'DRIP' (BABYMONSTER CHIQUITA FanCam) @SBS Inkigayo 241110](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/tnlxo79cAqY/mqdefault.jpg)
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Before i watched you, my mates and I called ourselves the Royal Potatoes. Will deffos check out Potato merch :D
@@VenonatJames* Noicee *
Charlotte, your satin shirt is so gorgeous on you! Will check it out too! Sending love from BC!
The weight one definitely cut in deep but once you find a good friend group, you all just fit and compliment each others' weird and vibe-
it's just *chef's kiss* 😘🤌
I'm still FLUFFY! 30lbs down but 60 to go! I got approved for a breast reduction surgery recently (will be in 10-14months)- and it's a massive motivation to go all the way so they can lift, nip and tuck all of it perfectly!
You need to find a Capricorn nerd, he will be your perfect match. I know because I found mine. 🙂
STOP WITH THE BELCHING!!! This phase has been over-done and btw it was NEVER funny, just GROSS. I don't care what the algorythym might indicate! Just no.
Hey Potato Queen, How about a thank you to us that have been and are subscribed, I have been since week one and I hear you "ask" for subs every video but never hear a thank you for us that have. Throw a little love back our way please. Luv ya Queen
The day I got married, my bridesmaid’s close friend died while I was getting my hair done that morning. As important as my wedding was I asked her if she wanted to go be with her friend’s family. It was more important to me that she was ok because I was still going to be married regardless of whether she was there but she declined and said as sad as she was she couldn’t imagine not being there for me. Looking back I can see the strength of our friendship and good, true friends are hard to come by.
My best friend had a misscarriage at 12weeks the day before my wedding…I spend most of that day being on the phone with her comforting her and pushed my appointments to the side to make space for her. I told her I would have loved her to be at my wedding but completely understand if she has to rest and is not in the mood but she refused and said we waited so long for this (have been with my now husband for 11years by then) and she would only miss it if there was no other choice. She was there, she even held a brief speech, we danced together on the dancefloor while crying, people must have thought we were a bit mental since nobody knew about the misscarriage but I don’t care. I am so grateful for her. She is so strong. Happily she fell pregnant only a month after and had a healthy baby girl so that helped her to heal
She's a keeper
Both of these stories- the original and then comment, are equally beautiful. Way to go gals. These are what a graceful bride and friend look like!
We love you ma'am 😘💗 and your friend. Giving me hope for humans.
and that's how a friendship should be. Not competing, not with a toxic power dynamic, and certainly not selfish.
The bridezilla's sister who lost weight is not in the wrong, but unfortunately in the wrong family.
AMEN!!!
Exactly
Exactly!
I can agree and relate..
What I don't understand about these brides yes it's your wedding but it's my life. Your wedding is just one day and when you act an "ass" for that one day, think about how it affects your relationship with your family after that "day".
First story...she's not the asshole for loosing weight before her sister's wedding. She made a choice that benefited her. If her sister and family can't accept that, then maybe that family shouldn't be in her life.
I'd just not go to the wedding and tell them all good riddance.
Not to mention, she probably started her weight loss journey before her sister even got engaged. That whole situation is awful!!! She needs a new family!
I lost a considerable amount of weight a few years ago ( and have not regained it). I also had always been the fat sister and my younger sister went through a bit of ambivalence about becoming the “fat sister.” She owned her feelings and didn’t blame me or get angry at me. Was more angry at herself for not having made similar lifestyle changes. I was in a 12-step program for food addiction and she eventually joined and had her own success and is feeling good about that. Regardless of our weight differences at different times in our lives we have been, and continue to be close.
@@eboniclarke177 Exactly I have no problem telling family and friends to F-OFF. I am the asshole and don't have a problem with it
I was really surprised that Charlotte said "I'll play the devil's advocate" and fully expected her to say the OP was the ah. I was really glad she didn't, of course, because anything else just doesn't make sense.
"Let me boil down the first one: I've been making healthy choices in my life and my family is upset about it. Should I have kept being unhealthy instead? " That the thought alone entered her brain shows just how dysfunctional her family is. YOU ARE ALWAYS ALLOWED TO MAKE HEALTHY CHOICES FOR YOURSELF.
Basically OP is not allowed to make any good decisions that will be benefit her so long as it doesn't make the family look just as good if not better than OP. You know, the typical narcissistic logic.
It mainly shows how deeply ingrained fat phobia is in everything. "healthy choices" has such moral value around it. If the wedding got pushed back due to the pandemic then a LOT of us here in the rich first world countries (and the US) have been gaining weight due to lockdowns. Yeah ok maybe you wouldn't gain weight if you did a strict at home work out regime plus ate a restricted amount of calories but this is very hard to maintain when you're mentally challenged by the whole media Rollercoaster we were going through plus potential fear for family members etc etc. Why does the sister and the whole family care that one sister is fatter than the other like that shouldn't be a thing to begin with. Leave the assumptions of healthy choices aside bc this implies fat is always unhealthy and skinny is always healthy.
@@Ruby-yn5fp how is it "fatphobic" for the sis to lose weight. Obviously being too skinny is as bad as being too fat. When you can't control yourself and always go to the extremes then it's unhealthy EITHER WAY.
The bride was the a-hole because she was toxic and would rather her sister sacrifice her physical and mental health for her.
Phobia means "extremely irrational fear of"
Wanting to lose or gain some weight (within the SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN limits so your body does not suffer from either too much or too little) then how is that an irrational fear of being fat? Moderation is healthy. Way more healthy than going to the extreme on either side of this metaphorical rope
@@raincloud-5516 I agree with you on pretty much everything except "Phobia means 'fear of [...]'". And, because I've read that A LOT of times already, I just want to remind you that sometimes the meaning of words can change or depend on context. Like for example the word "die". Do I mean someones gonna die or am I talking about dice? Or, something that fits more to the phobia one: Butterfly. The 'butter' in that word doesnt refer to the butter you put on bread. Butterfly is a completly different word. In other words, please seperate words like 'fatphobia' from words like 'Arachnophobia' and the likes because depending on the context or the rest of the word it has a different meaning.
Also, if you google for the definition then Arachnophobia means "extreme or irrational fear of spiders" while when you google fatphobia it says "irrational fear of, *aversion to, or discrimination against* obesity or people with obesity".
@@raincloud-5516 So aside from your definition of fatphobia being wrong (in this case it's used like homophobia) that's not what this person is saying.
She said that the sister (bride) is fatphobic because as Charlotte pointed out, she clearly wanted to have someone she saw as ugly because of her size by her side to look prettier. And that while this person did lose weight by making healthier choices, skinny isn't always healthy and a fatphobic culture puts any choice that makes you lose weight and is therefore considered "healthy" on a pedestal. Plus that if a little bit of weight (as OP stated the bride had only gained a little) was such a huge deal, it's because fatphobia is ingrained in our culture, which it is. (I was seriously fat-shamed for gaining weight while recovering from a severe eating disorder ffs).
I do agree with you that extremes in either side are bad, however what is currently considered "fat" and what is considered "extremely thin" are pretty detached from reality in my experience and that of most women I know.
When I got married I made the theme “wildflowers.” So everyone in the wedding party just wore anything they wanted. No theme or colors, it was at my parents house. The wedding party ended up looking stunning because everyone was themselves! I couldn’t have been happier. We all wore flower crowns to define the wedding party on my side. The guys had flowers too. My mother, aunt, cousin, sister, best friend, and mother were all my “maidens of honor.” I wouldn’t have it any other way. Their was no agenda, and last minute a family friend played his trumpet as we all walked out together down the “isle.” It was so much fun, everyone hung out, danced and ate. It was amazing, I was so relaxed and wouldn’t have had it any other way.
It sounds lovely.
Beautiful idea!! It will be some years before I marry, but I'll definitely keep this idea in mind
That sounds just lovely, exactly how the celebration should be. People nowadays make every life event an spectacle for no valid reason, it's so narcissistic imo. They always end up hurting people and finding little trivial things to stress about, and I bet they never look back on it fondly. I just dont get it..
Sounds like a great time!
Sometimes these kinds of weddings are best. Got married city hall and avoided all the unnecessary drama, expense and stress. I had just gotten out of hospital and told to take it easy anyway. It was very peaceful, only mom and partner were present. Our friends wanted to throw us a party and I said no thank you. We are older with past negative experiences and so a large reception wasn’t a big deal for us. They all had big lavish weddings when they were younger and didn’t get why we wanted to keep it simple.
I had a friend that asked me to be one of his groomsmen. But then the bride DEMANDED that her brother be in the wedding party. The groom felt REALLY bad about cutting me out but I said, “Don’t worry about it, As a groomsman my job is to make your day easier! Put me in charge of ice.”
So now… we’re still friends, but the brides not the bride anymore.
👏🏻 I love this. I would gladly be in charge of the ice. Thank you for being a solid friend to your buddy. Good riddance to the former bride 😆
Both my step mother who raised me and my half sister never told me when they got married, I found out months later both times (I don’t use social media but they have my number) with that and among other things I’ve realized I never meant anything to them at all so I stopped trying to keep relationships with people or family who don’t appreciate it. Life lesson learned and I couldn’t be happier.❤🩹 Love you Charlotte!☺
Didn’t mean to post that as a reply comment I can’t delete it for some reason.. but to your comment: good story happy y’all are still friends! :)
That's why we need to have brides-men and grooms-maids.
Brilliant. Love it
She gets healthy and loses 100 pounds -- an AMAZING accomplishment -- and her sister thinks she did it to upstage her. Yeah, I completely turned my life upside down for a whole year JUST TO PISS YOU OFF.
I lost weight before a holiday one year and one of the girls dropped out saying I’d done it on purpose to look cuter, and she wouldn’t be going because no one would be interested in her anymore. OKAY then, you just live in your little world love. I think she was a bit precious to be fair 😂😂
IKR. What a calculating deviant.
She probably thinks her sister did it upstage her because it's what she would have done herself. And the family agrees because they are also the type to do something just to upstage someone else. Awful people always think other people are being awful too, and it is a total mindf*ck to grow up with.
The worst part is that her family is taking her sister’s side and not ecstatic that their family member is now living a healthy life.
@@shazcon71 of course you did it on purpose to look cuter. Nothing wrong with that
I was always the fat one in my family so when I lost a lot of weight and got healthier (before kids lol) my brother called me a CRACKHEAD and then said my marriage was a GREENCARD marriage, and my husband would leave me.
His wife gained a lot of weight (which I don't mind, whatever, be comfy however you want but like... ironic) and she LEFT him after only like a year and a half.
I have two kids and we will be married four years in April.
He also lost all his hair.
Bwahahahahahahahaha
Karma is a beautiful warrior goddess.
It sounds like you might be one too. I am so happy for you that you have moved on to a happier, healthier place in your life and let your toxic brother deal with his own poisonous self.
And on a petty day The gods/god said ‘Let there be no hair’
I'll never understand why so many people think drugs are the only way for a person to lose weight. Like I know so many people that see a skinny person and think they must be a drug addict. It's very bizarre. Like maybe they have an eating disorder or a medical condition, maybe they are poor and barely eat... I would guess that the people who say these things are insecure and this is what they have to tell themselves to feel better. Not that that makes it ok, just trying to understand the logic, or lack there of.
@@thamertanner5448 I just wasn't depressed anymore and eating my feelings lol like it was so rude but he's bald and divorced now. Oops.
When my son was 5 his Dad got married. They did the wedding at the courthouse and did not include my son. He was so hurt, especially because he had a good relationship with his stepmother because I encouraged it. She's a really great lady. Needless to say when my husband and I got married a year later, my son was very involved. He called it "our wedding". I had him walk me down the aisle. My husband, his stepfather, was adamant that my was included in the wedding and my husband even had vows to my son. My son is 31 now and he still remembers that he wasn't included in his Dad's wedding.
As a Mother, this makes me so happy. Vows to your son, how stinking cute!!!
Thats really sad.. I'm glad you encouraged him to have a good relationship with his step mother. How could someone not allow their 5 year old son to come to their wedding? What reason could there be? It's so sweet you made sure he was such a big part of your wedding, being included so much must have made him feel valued and special
You can't blame the five year old. You need to have a discussion with his mother you said it yourself she's been coaching him. When he gets older he may realize how badly he treated you I know from experience my 17 year old step son apologized to me on his treatment of me being his stepfather his mother and grandmother both told him that I wasn't his father so he didn't have to listen to me it sucked when we divorced he came to live with me
@@angelperez-leon8042 Who's blaming my 5 year old? I've always encouraged his relationship with his Dad and Stepmother. FYI, my 5 year old in this anecdote is now 31.
My dad has been married twice, once when we were around 4 or 5 and again last year (I'm 28 now), and didn't invite me to EITHER one. The first time, he didn't bother even TELLING my mother he was married until she saw them together at his dad's funeral and saw she was pregnant
For the weight loss sister I BET she didn’t tell her family because their commentary and constant projection on her body impacted how she treated herself and needed some peace
Yep very true
Absolutely this ❤
Oh without question!
Yeahhhhhh when I told my mom I lost 20 pounds she replied with "and two months until you get 30 (pounds) back!" She was pissed when I lost 60 more
@@lilly1389 this comment made my day, love it! wish you the best
Yeah that first post.... given the fact that she had to move away from her family to lose weight, she wasn't comfortable enough to tell them she was losing weight, and the fact her parents took her sisters side in believing she was trying to upstage her.... I'm sure her family played a role in her being overweight in the first place.
You bring up a very good point.
This. I struggled and struggled with my weight during Jr high and high school. Got to college and dropped to literally half of my size. Kept it off until covid and life resulted in me living with my family again. After gaining back 50lbs I now realize the role family plays in weight loss and weight control
Yup, that's what I thought as well. Also, the audacity in her sister believing this personal success would be about her... Sounds like golden child ish to me.
@@norawade8127 yes. You can't heal in the environment that made you sick.
@@norawade8127 Sending you hugs. I hope that you are able to get away from that toxic environment and regain your happiness. 💙
My granddaughter is moh at her friends wedding. They’ve been friends all their lives. My granddaughter colours her hair,bright colours. Her friend asked if she could grow it out for the wedding. Because they’re besties she also said if the answer was no, she’d still want her as moh. My granddaughter said of course she’d do it, it would be good for her hair to have a rest anyway. That’s how mature friends behave guys
When we had our ceremony, we batted around several ideas in regards to food. We and most of our family/friends had very limited funds. We finally came up with an idea that ended up being amazing. We did a potluck, with a twist. Bring a dish to share and give us the recipe as the gift. We ended up with a large variety of foods and a wonderful recipe binder that has all those foods in it. A truly special wedding present and memories.
I really love this idea❣
Omg I LOVE that idea! 🤩🤩🤩
Awh that’s lovely!!
Yes!!! One of the best weddings I went to was potluck. The invitations said “in lieu of a gift please bring [x dish]” and the groom’s uncle did a spit roast. It was such a great icebreaker, too, talking about who made what, and what the favs were. It was over 15 years ago and I think about it regularly!
That's an amazing idea!
I used to be the girl who was ‘one of the guys ‘ in our friend group, we were once all single and going out every weekend to pubs and clubs. Then everyone intermingled and there are mostly couples in the group now. Over a few years I went through a transformation, lost some weight, fresh hair do, skin care, dressing to match my confidence on a night out etc. Now all the girls in the group are treating me differently and making it clear they think I’ve done this to try and snare their men. I no longer feel these are my friends because apparently once you make an effort for yourself, it actually means you’re a threat to existing relationships and out to steal everyone’s BFs...
These people are horrible. Even if you did this ludicrous thing of trying to ensnare the men by taking care of yourself- /s, how exactly are these men not responsible for their own marriages and wives?!
I was always " the single gal". I was treated like the wolf in the hen house. I was being myself and I would never "steal" a man. If he cheats/strays once, he will do it again.
Your former friends did not think you were a threat when you appeared "dowdy" by their standards. But, when you started to take care of yourself, your extra attractiveness coupled with the fact you still had the freedom to go out and play the field so to speak aroused their jealousy and possibly any insecurities they had. Plus, it is also possible those girls' men may have started to notice you too and possibly commented positively about your transformation which, again, brought out their women's insecurities. Congrats on your transformation. Be the butterfly and leave these girls behind.
Girl focus on beingg friends with the dudes. I was in that place before ( BUT I WAS DATING MY NOW HUSBAND!!). His friends are my friends too and with weight issues (gaining is hard and losing is way too easy) they know about they would encourage me i saw many a girlfriend come and go and the ones that stayed were the ones that encouraged me as well! I focused on being a good friend and not crossing any lines (to near malicious compliance "i cant do that bud if i buy you something ill hear it from gfsname later").
Do you. Keep up the work. And if it gets to bother you too badly go to their men and ask "i dont wanna have problems with you all or them nor do i wish problems for you. Is there something ive done to offend them?" By being respectful any bitchy answer they have can be met with "oh lol guess i was just misreading the vibe bro! Tell her i said hi!" Or " im sorry? I was trying to ask respectfully because i wish to fix any issues" and youll be the bigger person. It may also prove/disprove your feelings and open the boys' eyes up to how rude theyve(their girls) been to you
@@RoSez888 bros complimentingg women they see as bros tend to cause jealousy unintended, thats very true. It is possible they have praised or said happiness for your improvement and the women took offense or misunderstood it. Ive seen too many chicks go crazy over a guy praising a female friend out of friendship and not flirting. You make really good points here.
I got married while I was in the Air Force and stationed on the other side of the country. Because of this my fiance (now husband of 19 years), his sister and my sister all pulled together to get everything ready for our wedding. I had 2 weeks of leave to come home, get married and have a honeymoon. My sister and I went dress shopping the day I got home. The first dress I tried on was the one my sister picked out. It fit perfectly and I loved it! It didn't need any alterations, just a cleaning. My husband and I got married in my sister's backyard, my grandmother brought tons of flowers from her nursery for the day and my sister and her family decorated the backyard beautifully. Everyone brought a food dish to share that we set up buffet style. My husband's sister bought the wedding cake as a gift for us. And we handed out disposable cameras as our families arrived so they could take pictures if they wanted to. It was a low budget wedding that everyone contributed to in one way or another. I wouldn't trade that day for anything. Every year on our anniversary I still send out a little text to family members, thanking them for their specific contribution on our wedding day!
That sounds like a dream wedding! And I love the way you still honor their efforts on your anniversary. I truly don't understand why people feel the need to make such a special day so stressful for themselves (and their loved ones!). I want to be relaxed enough to laugh when something inevitably goes wrong and have the time and energy to enjoy being with all the people who are dear to our hearts. I'm not going to remember what the napkins looked like or whether the decorations were perfect; I'm going to remember being with my partner and the people I love.
Beautiful. This is how it should be
It’s very obvious why you’re still married - smart, grateful, positive. Your husband is a lucky man. I enjoyed reading your post!
I love the disposable camera idea so much! Back in 2002 my friends mom did that for his bar mitzvah! It was so cool to see everyone's different viewpoint and to see what moments they captured! 🥰
That sounds like a wedding I would have picked instead of a court house wedding if I had thought of it. Sounds like a perfect wedding. Small intimate wedding with family & close friends. I bet it was beautiful! So sweet on your anniversary you still thank everyone.
My mom used to be the "fat" sister in her family (she has 4 sisters) and while everyone else was getting normal gifts for Xmas or bdays, she always only got candy but at the same time they shamed her for being overweight (she was not fat or anything just more on the chubby side). It messed her up so bad, that she developed a eating disorder as a teenager and stopped eating completely (she went from L to S within a year) until one uncle (the only one in the entire family) talked to her and said 'if you keep going like this, you' ll die'. That woke her up a bit and from then on she tried to live as healthy as she could but even now with 63 she has a disturbed relationship to eating.
It's so sad. She looks great. She always did and always will but she does not see that 😕
I also use to be the "fat sister" and I lost a bunch of weight and developed an eating disorder and almost died inwas in denial until I almost died and was in ICU. My grandparents were very harsh about my weight and picked on me but picked on my brothers and male cousins for being so thin but I was the only one who hated myself for what I was. It's 9 years after I developed anorexia and I still struggle especially around the holidays I don't want to eat especially in front of my family and friends so yea family can truly mess you up.
@@Ravenlovesbingy this is sad. I am so sorry. Family can be a nightmare.
Exactly! My grandparents were brutal to my mom for being FAT, while her measurements were 36-22-35. She was so messed up, she messed up my sister & I. No matter how hard my sis & I tried, we messed up our kids. At 4 my niece said she had to go to the bathroom, why?... to throw up so she didn't get fat like you [me] & [her] mom. She was in therapy by the end of the week. It didn't help. So sad that at least 3 generations back caused twisted problems a full hundred years later!
Ugh I can relate to this so hard. My ex once had given me shit about the amount of sugar I ate to the point that I no longer ate anything sweet in the house. What did he get me for christmas? A box of chocolates.........
I am so sorry, I hope she'll get better.
If people thought half as much about their marriages as they do their weddings, there would be a far lower divorce rate.
🍵
Soooooo true!!
Some people only get married to have the dream wedding they’ve been thinking about since they were kids.
AMEN TO THAT!!!
@OPENYOUREYES ANDWAKEUP Ha!
My brother tragically passed away during the pandemic. He was obviously young and completely unexpected. A lot of people couldn’t come to his funeral. I was constantly questioned if I was mad at them by others. I was suprised by this. To be honest, he passed on our deceased mother’s birthday. My father and I couldn’t even remember who was or wasn’t there. I certainly was not mad at anyone who couldn’t make it.
I dont think we’re paying enough attention to charlottes hair she looks like a literal goddess
Her hair has looked SOOO good lately!!!!! Lol I always love it but dang lol 😂😂
Nah, her hair has been on point lately.
Yeah, I agree. bu, t your hawkmoth picture also needs attention 😂👌🏼
YES, I just commented that her blouse, hair, and manicure combo is sublime. Understated, but it makes it that much more awesome.
Since she has gotten it colored it is radiant!
The MIL of my best friend, turned up at the wedding, in a white dress! Everyone was horrified, but the photographer whispered in the brides ear "photoshop, honey". So everyone at the wedding laughed at the pathetic MIL, and in all the photos, she appeared to have been wearing pink, (which looked brilliant, as the rest of the wedding party was in shades of sea-blue)! Result!!
This is why a good photographer is worth paying for. 😁
That’s such an great photographer haha 😂😂😂
😂😂😂 Deserved
Epic photographer! True professional
As an amateur artist, that story about the live painting makes me so mad! And Charlotte is absolutely right! One painting can take months, or even a year or two to complete, depending on how important it is and how detailed! The shortest time that I've ever finished a painting was about 4 weeks, while the longest took me almost a year.
I doubt I'll ever have the skill to do live paintings, and I have massive respect for people who do. That's years and years of study and practice put in to mastering their craft!
I was the fat friend, and my closest friend at the time couldn’t be happy for me. Always making back handed comments about me being too skinny, or I looked better with more weight on me. It was like she wasn’t okay with me being thinner than her for the first time in our lives. Like I was just taking care of my health 🤷♀️
Same....my friend in nursing school was pissed I was trying so hard to lose weight after my 2nd kid....mind u she is big for health reasons I was big because of hormonal problems plus massive weight gain after 2 kids....I had gained 125 pounds.....so I literally researched the Atkins diet took NOTES on it and she told me I was starving myself and effectively ostracized me from everyone in class....I had ppd then and only had help thro Jesus himself.....she was very pissed I wasnt fat anymore....like my whole pregnancy her and the other tried to feed me bad shit all the time.....realizing tonight just how bad I've been taken advantage of my whole life
Even if you lose weight for purely looks, you are allowed.
My best friend has always been bigger than me and she would call me a skinny bitch sometimes especially when we were getting ready for something. It took years of that to finally say something to her and ask her to stop, cause I didn’t like it. The only things I’ve ever said about her was how beautiful she was and that’s all I got from her. I’m just glad she doesn’t make that comment anymore but damn it hurt my feelings lol
That poor women that lost weight and got healthy. To bad if people don’t like it. Time to set up some boundaries with her ridiculous family.
Throw the whole family away. She doesn't deserve to be in that environment
@ 11:10 “Can people start treating artists like the people they are and value their work?”
THANK YOU! I am a stained glass artist, Everyone asks me to make them something, for free, because they really love stained glass! One, it is a dying art. Two, glass takes things like copper to make red, that is pricey! All of the chemicals and tapes and solders and time! No! I cannot spend weeks on a piece and hundreds of dollars on glass, and give it to you! Just thanks person!
When my overweight younger sister lost over a hundred pounds and took my place as being the "skinny sister" I was so freaking happy for her. She looks stunning, feels great about herself, and is still the amazing person she has always been.
As for the rest of the bridezillas: it is literally ONE day of your life. Have fun and just go with it. By acting like this, you're ruining the wedding for everyone, including yourself. Focus on having a great marriage rather than a perfect wedding.
Well said, the marriage might last decades, the wedding is only a day
The only two times I went off on anyone before my wedding was when one of my bridesmaids kept saying at my bachelorette party that it was going to rain the day of my wedding. I asked her several time to stop but she JUST. KEPT. SAYING IT. So I finally turned around and threatened to leave her on the side of the road and she'd have to walk back to my apartment if she said it one more time(this was after about the tenth time she said it and I'd ask her to stop).
The other time was right as I was leaving the bridal suite and dad's wife stopped me to tell me that I invited my half-brother(my dad's son) to the wedding and that it made her uncomfortable. I said, well he's my brother and family so of course he'd be here. She replied, "well I don't really consider him family." I gently put my hand on her shoulder and said, "now you know how I feel about you." And walked out of the bridal suite.
Made for an interesting night after that 😂
I'm sure it did!!😁
They both totally deserved it lol
Your words to your stepmom, epic 👍🤌
Go off Queen
You know, it tells me everything, that you calling her dad's wife and not mother, or something else. :D She deserved it.
I had a friend of 20 years call me a c##t and cut me out of her life because I cancelled travelling internationally to go to her sister’s wedding 1 week before the wedding. I needed an emergency procedure on my spine after an accident and wasn’t allowed to travel for 3 weeks post surgery. I told them as soon as I found out and apologised profusely for the late cancellation. It still blows my mind though. It wasn’t even her wedding and I’m still in contact with her sister though. We get along really well 😂
I personally believe that there are 3 things no one should ever apologize for:
- following your dreams
- doing the right thing
- trying to better yourself (this includes getting your health in check whether it's physical or mental)
Things I've learned:
1. If they are going to be overdramatic about a one day event, they are going to be overdramatic about everything else and will sap your sanity.
2. If they are willing to kick a person out of the wedding party over something minor, they aren't your friend and you are wasting your time with them.
3. If I ever fall for a girl like these bridezillas, please shoot me.
@Stefania I don't think so. Usually they have their moments before that, people are just so in love they will not pay it enough attention. There's still a chance to call off the wedding if her true colours show during the engagement period. However, I think you can reveal a bridezilla before proposal if you ask her about her dream wedding. From these stories, it seems they don't know how to be subtle about it.
@Stefania Ohh, haha, that's a good comparison. It went completely over my head honestly.
My sister was a complete bridezilla. I could write a novel, but I was told that I couldn’t sit in an aisle seat because my afro hair would be a distraction when she walked down the aisle.
Wowwwww. 😬 Yikes!
Wow, please tell me you finally sit at front row, directly straight to her face?
Oh yeah, coz an afro is SO much more noticeable than someone staying up on front of everyone in a huge, pristine white dress
This needs context. If she had a photographer and specific pictures she wanted and was asking everyone with more muted colors and shorter people etc sit close to the aisle so they blurred more easily or whatever I could understand it. But I bet she just wished she could have your hair
@@laurynholling2309 it wasn’t about photos she thought it was too distracting and was worried it would get into the aisle (my fro is a loose Afro and isn’t one of those giant Afros (not that there is anything wrong with giant Afros. They look cute. Just needed to provide that detail for context)
The cavity bridezilla seems to have forgotten there’s this handy little tool called Adobe Photoshop. It can work magic and if the photographer knows his/her tools they will know how to fix this issue.
Or visit the dentist nearby
Wow, i did not think someone would take that seriously. Let me tell you: I look like i look, the good parts and the bad parts, and if someone who calls me friend would go behind my back and photoshop me, I would be fucking angry. Thats the worst kind of bodyshaming!
@@endlessstudent3512 They aren't photoshopping a birthmark or something that is part of the person, they are photoshopping a cavity, a temporary feature that is eventually going to have to be treated or pulled completely anyway.
That's what I was thinking... like, it is a stupid tooth that can be retouched
I know what it is to be plagued with bad front teeth. I fixed it since, but at the time I just avoided smiling or I put my hand in front of mouth. The future MOH don't want to smile either imo. It's very embarrassing, why would she purposely smile with her teeth out on the pictures? The bride is worried for nothing. The poor girl will be careful until she can fix her teeth
I wasn't stressed at all for my wedding. My mom thought I was a little too laid back. Reception was at a local firehall, food cost about $5000, my cousin was photographer, multiple family members did video, my dress was $300 and my grandmother did all the alterations. It was a beautiful ceremony at my church and awesome reception. My focus was the marriage. Relax, have fun, the wedding is just one day.
Sounds great
The total amount I spent on my wedding was about $4,500. I made the food(sandwiches), the punch(no alcohol due to the amount of religious people and I happen to respect boundaries), and our venue was only $200 because my husband was the night time security officer. The punch was cherry limeade and quite popular. The only thing I did not like was my hair style, but since hair and makeup was done for free by one of my bridesmaids sister I just kept quiet and politely thanked her. Yes, weddings are stressful, but you can actually be nice even if things weren’t like you hoped. Just try to relax people! I had a dress that made me feel like a queen, the cake of my dreams, an amazing photographer, and we all had a nice time.
That's sounds so wonderful and stress-free!
As the fat sister/friend, etc., I can attest to the fact then when/if you lose weight, the people close to you are definitely NOT always supportive. Also, I feel like the algorithm has you here because the fountain of content for this series is NEVER-ENDING! hahahaha
My mother and sister followed me around chanting "I hate you because you're so skinny" over and over. I just do not understand this attitude, but it seemed perfectly sane to them.
I have always been the fat one as well. This is going to change.
@@Wednesdaywoe1975 omg that’s the same story with me 🤗
Agreed my best friend isn’t that supportive she tells me I look like I have an ed I lost 70 pounds my my bmi was still 28 soo far from it
This is so true. I lost 115 lbs about 10 years ago and had many relationships change. My work BFF even started telling other coworkers that I was either bulimic or had gotten gastric bypass because there’s no way I could’ve lost the weight on my own. It was extremely hurtful.
Oh, that poor woman- actually feeling the need to ask AITA for just losing weight! For her sister to react like that, you can see what her childhood must have been like, living with a narcissistic sibling ☹️
You're right but i also think it sounds like the whole family has narcissistic tendencies and OP was the scapegoat.
growing up in the trama of that awful family may well have caused the poor girl to balloon up in the first place. Getting some separation from the family and a healthier lifestyle likely helped her lose 100 lbs in a year.
There is an update on that story: OP ended cutting the whole family off her life. Simple as that.
Just how her family must have fucked her up if she even thought that there was a chance that she were indeed an a-hole.
@@perjus- Good. The fact that the family decided she was vindictive for just making healthier choices for herself is wretched. She’s better off.
Many years ago I was invited to a wedding. I happily accepted, even though I’m gay and was told I couldn’t bring a + one, because I’d bring a guy, and her family “wouldn’t understand”. Then it got more stupid. When the family started getting replies, their story was, they got too many “yeses” back. Then because I was the group from work, we were told that since family and friends were more important than coworkers, we wouldn’t be invited to the dinner part of the reception. The coworkers would have to hang out in the lounge, buy our own drinks and food, and wait for dinner to conclude. Then we’d be able to join the rest of the reception. Oh WAIT! All of a sudden about 90 minutes after dinner was to begin, the bride appeared in the lounge and sadly told us that the room the reception was taking place in was a bit smaller than they anticipated, and she would hang out with her coworkers in the lounge for 30 minutes in order to take in the beauty of her gown, and then rejoin the good party. She also gladly accepted the gifts her “nasty” coworkers brought. I don’t think I ever got a thank you note either.
This is partly why if anyone was mad enough to marry me, I'd insist we do the legal stuff with a few witnesses then just have a party with a buffet that evening with the rest. No need for all this formalities and schedules, first dances or speeches. Simply "Hi, we got married! Enjoy the party, take a few photos if you want and have a good one!" Simple.
I would want only me and my partner, and plan the day for ourselves celebrating. It's better to go out to dinner with your close family after all this and treat them, maybe a small party that's it. Parties=stress
Hi T. That's exactly what we did. Both second-timers, we got married on a stunning Scottish beach, just us, the celebrant and the witnesses (provided by wedding company) and it was absolutely perfect. We had already invited everyone to our 'engagement party' to be held a couple of weeks later so everyone turned up, thinking they were going to toast our engagement. That gave us enough time to edit a short video of the wedding (again, the wedding company organised it) and add music. The venue had a screen and the video played .... "Surprise! Welcome to our wedding!!"....and we walked into the room. Everyone loved it! We loved it most because it was exactly what WE wanted; little stress, low cost (although that wasn't the main motive), personal, intimate, solely about us. Too many weddings are about the MiL or MoH or "No children" and someone brings their tantrum-prone 3 year old. No thank you!!! It's YOUR wedding. if you're not doing exactly what YOU want, you're doing it wrong.
My dream wedding!
That's what my brother and SIL did. They got married, at our equivalent of city hall, with close family and some friends. This was on monday morning, because it's free then. On saturday they rented out a pub and had a very chill party for everyone. They eventually got gifted more money than what everything cost. Wedding done right!
But it's tradition to give away tens of thousands of hard earned dollars to people to give you a mediocre/boring party!!! What are you monsters going to target next!?! Diamonds!?! How are they going to sell one of the most common gemstones in the world for the highest prices that immediately drops 50% in value, if they lose engagement ring "tradition"?!? Terrible!! Doesn't anyone think of con artists' feelings and needs?!?
I've definitely experienced "friend" loss. Almost IMMEDIATELY after finally kicking my loser, physically abusive husband out, I had no more friends. None. The neighborhood mom's that had playdates with our three kids, gone. The people we had dinner parties and game nights, gone. I was already traumatized and physically mangled from the marriage and being shunned really gave my self esteem an additional hit that took years to move past.
I hope you're doing well now❤
Yes. I hope you are doing well, too. 💜
As someone who has a cavity on a front tooth, it’s extremely self esteem killing and if my “best friend” didn’t invite me to their wedding simply because of that, saying it would ruing the pictures I would definatly feel very hurt and mostlikely developed more of a complex to hide my smile after that, even more than I do now. I hope she didn’t do that to her friend
I don't know why you would have a cavity and not get it fixed.
@@arianebolt1575 I was living with a guy who had all of the control in the relationship and didn’t care enough about my health to get me in to see the dentist, even when he had a thousand dollars in his wallet, I didn’t have transportation of my own, I would ask him and he would say he would but never did after years. But I’m in a better living situation now and got into the dentist and soon I’m going to go back in to get the cavity taken care of. It’s not that I didn’t want to, I didn’t have the means or ability to do it on my own
@@arianebolt1575 a lot of people can't afford dental care.
@@katharineeavan9705 Maybe the bride could offer to pay to fix it.
I'm from a large Hispanic family and I've never seen anyone ask for money for their Wedding food. Then again, we are really big on hospitality and making sure everyone is well fed so asking people to pay for food at a special occasion would have sounded rude when I was growing up. We do however invite others to bring bulk side dishes if they would like because more food is always welcome. You always have those Aunts or Abuelita's that know a great gift is to roll up their sleeves and cook up hundreds of homemade tamales, empanadas, or green chile stew...and they don't do "Plus 1", they do "are your friends hungry?"
Or they try to send food to ALL the relatives and people around and you end up like some sort of uber eats.
If your family has another wedding may I come. It sounds wonderful and delicious!
Half Hispanic, I love when my Puerto Rican family visits and kicks me out of the kitchen :)
The girl who didn't want her husband-to-be child coming to wedding bc he's rude to her....I completely understand that! Here me out, my now, ex-husband's daughter was 3 yrs old when we met. She was very rude towards me, didn't listen to me, etc. My ex never put his foot down with this type of behavior and it progressively got worst as the years went on, 7 years later, we are divorced and his daughter is rude to the new lady in his life. My point: Her future husband needs to step in and help fix this problem. It can get worst the older the child gets. At 5, the mom is definitely coaching him, but it can end up being a behavior that doesn't stop, even when the child gets to an age where they know the difference between what's wrong and what's right.
Oh my god you poor thing, how did you get over the trauma of a 3 year old being rude to you? Are you in therapy? Are other 3 year olds triggering you?
@@tee8839 are you genuinely concern or just making fun
Because if it's the second option your a jerk
I had to think about the story in the video..... the mom is coaching the kid, so It's not the kids fault (Who knows what all she is telling him). So my next thought is, what will the mom tell the kid to do at the wedding to ruin it?! Yes, the Father needs to talk to the son about not listening to the mom as far as telling him to be rude to his GF/wife, period (Also suggest family therapy). But he needs to wait till day of the wedding to tell son, he will NOT put up with any rude behavior that day period, so son doesn't tell mom which would give her time to think of other things. Then father needs to agree to assign a relative to be ready to pick up his son and haul him out of church/ reception the moment he starts causing a scene. Might need to have a babysitter on hand if needed, in case they need to send son to time out for a while.
Edit to add: Father needs to document all the times his son tells them the mother told him to do such and such, or mother gave him permission to do it etc... then the father has ammo if he ever decides to fight for custody on basis of mother trying to use parental alienation against father and soon to be step mother. The GF just needs to be patient and kind, any outbursts from son she needs to just let father deal with him till the boy comes around. As long as she doesn't push the kid away, or hold a grudge and retaliate, she'll eventually grow on him.
I was the child to my stepmom, it can get better & when the child grows up our eyes open. My dad stayed out of it growing up n we both hated it. But my stepmom is the best person I know & first person I call about anything now.
100 % true. My hubby's ex never stopped neither did her son. My hubby tried to stop it but this chick is a hurricane of hatred and bitterness which has continued for 8 years. The son has zero relationship with his dad because if her BS. The daughter was smarter but sadly has fallen victim to her mother's bs and it's sad that the kids suffer.
It never ceases to amaze me how many people seem happy to trash a lifetime friendship for the sake of one day.
The first one was probably mad because she'd told all her friends "My fat sister will be there".
Grossss that's so mean but yeah you're probably right 😭😭😭
or "if you think I'm fat, just wait till you see my sister!"
"It's genetic. My whole family cant stay in shape no matter how hard we try." "What about your sister?" .... SCREEECH!!!!
Even if she didnt tell people her sister was fat. And who goes around saying their sister is fat? I do think she got used to being the thinner one. Now that she is smaller than her its threatening.
@@inesnathaliengoua someone more toxic than Chernobyl
My mother was mad at me because I was married, happy with a girl and a boy. She said it was bad all this good came to me because my sister was married three times, had 4 boys and very unhappy. She said it should be the other way around. Thanks mom.
Are you sure she is your mom?
Your mum should be happy for you, and because you've had it good doesn't mean your sister can't do the same.
It'll probably just take some time for her, but she doesn't have to be married to be happy. If anything this means she'll have more freedom, be able to put herself first and do the things she couldn't do in a relationship.
Maybe she should ask the sister why she got married thrice and got pregnant everytime too?
Ugh, was she drunk?
Your sister made her own bed. It wasn't luck. Inform your mom. Be kind to the boys as they will need it. Go VLC with your sister and mom.
Apparently, by fae logic, Maleficent was perfectly in her rights to curse that child because the king and queen were absurdly rude to her. Had they properly invited her, she would have brought a really nice gift, maybe gotten the three other fae there to put the effort into even nicer gifts for little Aurora to compete. But instead, they snubbed her and when she gave them a chance to walk it back, they doubled down. At that point, she's almost required to dole out punishment to them.
I wasn't a Bridezilla on my wedding day but one of my bridesmaids was a bridesmaidzilla. My cousin has very severe psoriasis that literally covers 98% of her body from scalp to her toes. My cousin is VERY self conscious about her psoriasis and wears anything to cover it all year long so when we were shopping for bridesmaids dresses I was looking for a dress that my cousin would be comfortable in but the rest of the bridesmaids would wear a different style from her. Well one of my bridesmaids had the audacity to say ' she doesn't understand why I'm giving my cousin special treatment just because she has a disgusting disease and she would be embarrassed at her own wedding if she had a bridesmaid with them nasty disgusting white pouches in her picture' needless to say I educated her ass about psoriasis and kicked her out of my bridal party with no hesitation. Idgaf that she spent hundreds of dollars on stuff for herself for my wedding and went off on her plus her family when she went on social media to act like a victim and she did nothing wrong but what really did it for me is when her family defended her statements about my cousin and psoriasis like what tf is wrong with people 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Psoriasis can just form anytime throughout your life, is hereditary, does not care race you are and can NOT be cured but is manageable with the proper meds that works for you ( psoriasis meds are very very very expensive and most insurance do not cover the meds).
Sadly psoriasis is an autoimmune illness. Very hard to cure. Any meds leave the person open to other illnesses.
5 days before my wedding, tried on the wedding dress again (I thought I'd gained weight), it tore. 3 days before the wedding the venue ( that was owned by my bosses business partner) called and said that the limo I hired had broken down and it wouldn't be fixed in time. They called the day after that and said they'd had a few fights at recent weddings and wanted door staff present, and that I now needed to pay for, I said no. I didnt kick off. I didn't scream and shout at people. I did go back to mums and have a 10 minute cry, but then I put on my big girl pants and got it sorted, like you do. But I did kinda say if 1 more thing goes wrong, we're gonna call it off cos I was getting major bad omen vibes. Well, dress got fixed, another carwas hired, the door staff were present but the venue paid their wage, and it went ahead without any major issues (except a row with my dad in the evening for being rude to other (disabled) guests), and then, almost 8 years to the day later, I found out hubby had been cheating for a year. So, in hindsight, I probably should have listened to the old gut about 3 strikes being a bad omen and cancelled it. Oh well. Lol
I'm so sorry that happened to you. you sound so head strong and confident, go girl!
So sorry for you, we never listen to ourselves. After seeing this type of thing so often, I decided to get married at city Hall.
What was that about disabled guests?
@@lahlybird895her dad was being rude so she yelled at him
@@hayleyz1703 I was more wondering what her dad did or said to them
The weight loss story hurts. The bride literally was accusing her sister like she was trying to overshadow her wedding by losing weight. Like, the process of losing 100 pounds in less than a year is traumatic enough. She didn't "conveniently" wait until sisters wedding to announce it, she didn't want to make a big deal of it to begin with otherwise she would have said something!
Always so disappointing when your own family puts you down like that. They should all support and encourage her. THEY are the A-holes!!
I got married and never acted this way to anyone. Weddings just bring out the real personality that people are hiding.
I KNOW RIGHT.
I'm right with you! These people are nuts!
@@margaretakins6829 Always loved that from the moment I read it so long ago.. It fits so well.. 😁Right on!
My mother has always loved disaster movies, "Because it brings out people's true characters." Like, how you see the guy who's a bit of a jerk showing up as the REAL hero, while the charismatic leader falls to pieces, and shoves vulnerable people out of the way so that he can be first in the lifeboats, even if there are enough seats for all. My Mom LOVES that stuff.
Weddings and funerals are like disaster movies without the life-and-death situations and body count.
I love at the end of the video where she tells you to clean your sinks and that’s exactly what I’m doing while listening to her video 🤣🤣
Argument former fat sister could use:
“I won’t ruin the pictures”
Using one bridezilla argument against another 😝
booom! ahahaha perfect
The best thing is that bridezilla would get even madder since she would think it's now her, bride herself, ruining the pictures.
Which is not even true since extra pounds are not like that but well, she looks like a person who would think that way.
Good one.
or: "Who's the fat sister now? HAHA!" I mean gimme a break, bride needs to get over herself.
what amuses me is the fact that the "victims" of these bridezillas still want to be in the wedding; or even to be in the bridezillas life. i'm not afraid to cut ties with friends and family who treat me like shit.
What I hate is when someone does something and gets grouped with other family members and I get caught in the crossfire having zero to do with anything, having been not there or liking contact with the evil ones!
Spot on about relationship dynamics changing from weight loss. In college and a few years after, I had this "skinny blonde chic" as a friend (this is what she called herself). She always said that she had the successful body while I had the successful career.
I lost 75 pounds and ended up being size 8/10. Wow, she could not handle it. She's been out of my life for almost 20 years, and I do not miss that toxicity.
My weight loss also impacted my relationship with my sister. Boy, that brat baby acts like she's taking a lashing on the back when I get a compliment. When I first lost weight, I was actually embarrassed for her. So childish and self-centered.
My second wedding (to the same man I married 30 years ago, we split up then got back together) was just going to be us away getting married in Bali. But for just us it was the same as the register office at home and a meal with immediate family so we chose to pay for that. It was all we could afford. However, people asked if they could come to the register office and we mentioned the meal was just for us, 50 people wanted to come and join us and paid for themselves. Which I loved and was wonderful. We had to budget small, but friends and family wanted to join us and make it all the more special. I loved it for that reason ❤️ I even let my bridesmaids wear whatever they felt comfortable in. As well as guests could be as dressy or casual as they wanted. It was so relaxed and happy and everyone said it was the best time they’d had at a wedding in ages. Win win for everyone ❤️
I love this! You must be a p cool person to have friends who are willing to do this for you ❤ Sounds like you communicated clearly and were open-minded about people's preferences, and it worked out great!
@@marije8562 it was so much better than I could have hoped for. No photographer. Everyone took photos and I gave a bottle of champagne to the person who took my favourite photo. It was so much better than a big wedding that is everyone you’ve not seen in forever. 🤗😘
This really touched me and made me go awww that sounds like an amazing day and you have awesome friends who still wanted to be part of your day!!!
@@charlottecraddock4194 it was amazing. The day was full of milling about, no schedules, laughter and just love. I think there too much placed on who has the biggest bash and invites who and the best theme etc... it doesn’t make marriage work better or happier. I worry for some couples who start with that expense. Is it really about them or just pomp and ceremony ❤️
My wedding day was very similar. We got engaged young and we're saving up money for a big wedding when I got pregnant. We decided to forgo the big wedding and use the money for the baby, and instead we were just going to go to the courthouse. My mom and my pastor convinced me to have a simple ceremony at my home church, and all of my family got together and paid for the ceremony and reception dinner. Since my brother was okay with us getting married on his birthday, we let him pick out the restaurant for the reception and we paid for his meal. It's such a great feeling when you realize you have a great support system.
Wow that girl losing weight and her parents taking her sister side.... That's sick.
I also have lost 100 lbs over the course of this year but thankfully my family is happy for me.
I can totally relate to OP. I lost a very good friend (or so I use to think) because I lost over 100 lbs and looked fabulous! She was so jealous she refused to come to my wedding when I met the man of my dreams.
SO sorry - what an awful thing for her to do to you.
So sorry that happened to you. May I ask, did she admit to being jealous and ditching you wedding out of jealousy or did she just make it obvious? I just can't imagine the audacity.
I've just had a "friend" of 4 years go completely vicious towards me because I've made positive changes and started standing up for myself. We both have mental illness, and I've often ignored his derogatory comments about me because of his schizophrenia. In the last 3 years, I've been in therapy and take medication for my severe depression and I'm doing much better. It seems the more confident I become, and the more positive changes I make (I've quit drinking and using weed entirely) the angrier he became.
He often put me down because of my southern accent (I'm originally from Texas) and he's called me a racist on several occasions when HE made an offensive racist joke and I told him it wasn't funny. The last time I saw him, we were in his truck coming back up the mountain from a shopping trip. We both live in a small mountain community. I saw a truck pulled off the road I recognized as belonging to one of my newer neighbors, so I asked him to stop and see if the guy needed help because I thought I recognized him. We stopped, the guy was waiting for his overheated truck to cool down but had water, so we left. I told my "friend" that the gentleman is the new guy who lives near me, I recognized his face when we pulled over. My "friend said, "You just think all Mexicans look alike because you're racist!" That really pissed me off, so I told him that either he thinks I'm racist, or he said that to hurt me, and neither of those are acceptable so I don't want to continue our friendship. Besides, I never said anything about the gentleman's nationality, but I did mention that he was handsome.
He got very angry, said he was "just joking", so I asked him to explain why that would be funny? He just got angrier.
Bye Felicia!
I've blocked his number and Facebook account. That was months ago, and he's still telling anyone who will listen what a terrible person I am. I see what he's doing, this is classic narcissist gaslighting; making stuff up because he expects me to respond to defend myself. I won't, because I've better things to do. That would only give him validation and attention that he wants. Anyone who believes him is not a person I'd want to be friends with anyway.
Now he's saying that driving to my house caused $3000 damage to his truck because my dirt road is rough. Funny, my 17 year old Hyundai car handles it fine, so not my problem if he doesn't know how to drive his truck! Anyway, he hasn't even been here in 4 months, so I don't see how he can blame damage done by his poor driving on me.
He also blames me for his previous truck catching fire and burning up. It was caused by a rat's nest in the engine, which he claims must have happened during the hour or so he was parked at my ranch! He lives in an RV parked at a heavily wooded campground, where wood rats are a frequent problem. 🙄
That person is not your friend. He is treating you like a punching bag for his negative emotions. Then because you were so down on yourself he found an easy scapegoat, you couldn't and didn't fight back against his abuse. It's just like any abusive relationship, they look for people who are "weak", which really just means someone that hates themself enough to take the abuse. Now you have turned yourself around, which is absolutely amazing and you are a warrior for yourself now! All that guy wants is someone to be mean to to make himself feel better, and you are too strong to be that person anymore. You are absolutely awesome for helping yourself get better, and you deserve friends that shower you with positivity, not anger and insults, venting AT you is not the same as venting TO you. You are a stronger pesrson now and cutting him out of your life is even more proof of that. You go girl!!!
Schizophrenia or not, he has no right to treat anyone like that. Glad you’re rid of him
Schizophrenia or not, he has no right to treat anyone like that. Glad you’re rid of him
@@EEsmalls What an amazing post.
I read the initial post and sat here trying to think of what to say and keep it positive and encouraging. Unfortunately, I've developed some cognitive dysfunction from 40+ years of chronic illness and pain so was sitting here stumped and getting miffed at my inability to express myself anymore.
*Then* I read your comment. Perfect!
Thank you
@@suestoons I'm honored that I was able to help speak your mind as well ma'am. Not being able to communicate how you wish must be very frustrating.
I had my own bridezilla moment with my 2nd oldest sister years ago. I had to have emergency surgery to remove my gallbladder after being in the hospital for a week waiting for the infection to subside. Ended up leaving the hospital with drainage tubes and was told to stay in bed. Because of all this, I was not able to go to bridesmaid dress fitting. Our oldest brother got involved and my ex husband was accused of causing the gallstone attack and my sister accused me of doing this on purpose. As I said, I had drainage tubes sticking out of my body and needless to say, the dress would have been ruined. Then, a couple months later, at the wedding, I had to be pinned into the dress because of all the weight I lost, and was accused of losing weight to spite her( I have NEVER gotten along with this sister and I'm sure I was only asked for apperances). She was always thinner than me and I was always the fat sister and my family did judge my looks ALOT. She would tease me relentlessly about my weight at any opportunity, but I was willing to put that aside for the wedding. You just can't please some people,huh? 😊 P.S. - I forgot to mention that when I announced my engagement, she rushed to announce her wedding because my favorite brother asked her how it felt to be an OLD MAID ( Yeah, she made her fiance propose)! BTW, they were DIVORCED A YEAR AND A HALF LATER!!
All these brothers and sisters being mean and nosy, and the fact you said my favorite brother remind me of "milkman" by anna burns
I just had my gallbladder removed on the 11th. It wasn't an emergency like yours but if I had left it in any longer it might have become like that. I can't imagine how much worse it must have felt with an infection. Your sister sounds like a garbage human. Obviously an EMERGENCY surgery isn't something that can be planned and done on purpose.I hope you and your husband are going strong and I'm glad her marriage didn't last.
I almost died from that and ended up in the I.C.U. unit. The pain unbelievable. I had been hospitalized before but didn’t get the surgery. The last attack was life threatening my organs were infected. It’s no laughing matter. Sorry but your family not too sensitive. All these dramas that families choose to impose on others is so petty and the divorce is proof!
The fact that she didn't get scolded by the family for saying these things is weird.. i would have shouted at her in front of everyone
Friends of ours got married, and we had to buy tickets for our meals, plus cash bar, plus bring a gift. I was talking with the bridesmaid and explained that we’d be delighted to witness the wedding, and stay for 1 drink to toast the couple, but between gas, parking, buying a new outfit (semi formal required), and the cost of the drink we could not afford the additional cost of the meal and a gift from the registry.
Tried to have a discussion with the bridesmaid about other gift alternatives only to be shot down. We were told that if we could not afford a gift from the registry and the meal ticket then don’t bother showing up at all, she’ll change our rsvp to unable to attend.
I saved the conversation, showed hubby and filed it away. We sent a congrats card and left it at that. The bridesmaid contacts me the day after the wedding asking a) why didn’t we come, b) if we knew we weren’t coming why didn’t we send a gif, and c) why wasn’t there money in the card we did send. I asked her if the couple was aware of her reaching out like this and of her dis-inviting us to the wedding. She claimed we weren’t dis-invited and that they were both fully aware of her actions and stood behind her 100%. Told her that this was a conversation I’ll have with the couple at a later date.
Couple calls a week later and asks me why I made all these promises to the bridesmaid then didn’t follow through on any of them. They were under the impression that since hubs and I have decent jobs we were going to gift them something like $1500 (pay for the honeymoon), plus the meal tickets, plus a big ticket item from their registry.
I sent the convos that I saved and asked if they really were 100% on board with the bridesmaid’s strong arm tactics. Didn’t hear from them for another week. Finally heard back…
seems the bridesmaid thought I was their golden goose. I have a designer purse, (that I saved 6 months to buy 7 yrs ago), I wear new pricey runners, (I have orthopaedic running shoes, my clinic has a place that custom makes shoes), my hair is always dyed, (my cousin is a colourist and does it for free), I have fancy computer equipment, (I have some disabilities).. (btw, dragon speak is amazing software just saying)….
So all of this to say: maybe rethink your venue and menu if you feel that you need your guests to pay for their own meals, or else be prepared for the guests to bring their own food. Every single event, since that wedding, that states I need to pay extra for the meal, I advise that I have serious food allergies and will bring my own food to be safe. (This way, I can have a strawberry and salmon salad, a shrimp cocktail, and a steak with baked potato.)
Wow! I can speak only from the point of view of my culture, but I would be too embarrassed to expect guests to pay for meals.
Sometimes close families and friends do a potluck meal and family and friends will contribute in other ways. That's different because it's sweet, and loving, and comes from the heart.
However, when you're selling tickets, or pressuring the guests in similar ways, then NO. If it's too expensive to have a large celebration, then you should have a smaller one.
Bridezilla: “How dare you lose weight and take care of your health! You are trying to upstage me!”
If I were OP, I would been like “Sorry you’re offended by me having the audacity to lose weight and take better care of my health. I can just not come to the wedding if it will make you feel better.”
I wouldn't even give them that choice, I'd just remove myself and go home at that point, she's probably spent enough of her life feeling like shit, doesn't need to come from the family too
I’d reword with.
“Sorry you’re offended by me having the audacity to lose weight and take better care of my health. I cannot go to the wedding if you’d think that’ll make you’ll pretty… though. I can’t change the reality.”
The petty part of me, would just show up to the wedding looking smoking hot. Everything on point.
I don't know about the second one. It's messed up that he probably can't attend the wedding but I mean, having CPS getting involved for what sounds like false allegations is pretty extreme. And I'm not blaming the kid at all. The mom is a terrible person for using him as a weapon in her petty rampage. But if she's willing to coach him on saying such things, I would not put it past her to coach him in ruining the wedding in some way. It can be a simple command like "Throw juice on the bride bc it will be funny." I kind of see where she's coming from on that. Tough situation.
Same...plus why isn't the father more involved in making the kid behave too. 😒
@@SoManyRandomRamblings Good point.
So...he needs to step up. Period. The mother is ridiculous & childish but behaviour needs to be called out.
I would let the child be there. Let the child make a scene. Show the child that you aren't trying to take their father away.
The child's behaviour can't ruin the wedding but your reaction can be the foundation of the new family.
My minister says my husband and I are the most gracious couple ever because our response to having our reception flooded was to provide extra tips for the volunteers because they worked hard dealing with the water while we continued to celebrate. Being gracious with the groom's child seems like a no brainer if the marriage is the important thing.
@@pattygould8240 I'm sure you are a gracious couple, but I fail to see the similarities between having a flood at your wedding and a groom/father trying to navigate a family dispute so significant that CPS had to be involved. Your situation was an accident; there was no chance for a preemptive choice. His is. And it's a decision with that puts deeply rooted relationship dynamics at stake. There are a lot of emotions being thrown around and personally as a social worker who has seen dysfunctional families at play, I can tell you things are far more complex than advising everyone involved to just be gracious
For the meal ticket question, I knew a couple who invited some close friends and family and church group to their wedding and wanted everyone to pay for their own meal ticket. They basically said that they didn't want or expect any wedding gifts, and their only request was for each guest to pay for their meal. They didn't have a registry and the wedding was super low key. I think a big part of it was that they weren't entirely sure how many people were going to come since they were free we inviting various guests and their respective families. I thought that it was sweet and no one took offense.
My sister lost a lot of weight, not for my wedding, but at the same time. I was so happy for her.
Also, my huz had a 5 year old. Since i didn't want kids I was relieved. It was weird having to deal with a kid, but I figured it it's about your husband, if they have a kid, you must adapt.
Several days before the wedding we had been snipping at each other for no apparent reason and I took it to mean that we were in a fight. (We weren't but were extremely nervous) Then I got my period a few days early and I was afraid to tell him because in my messed up bridal braid "he won't want to marry me if we can't have sex on our wedding night." Uh - fast forward 29+ years and we can laugh about it and how crazy it all was. So glad we were able to get past all the crazy and are now happily wed with four nearly adult kids.
In support of the woman who wanted to sew her dress…when I make a dress, or anything, no one can tell that I made it myself! NO ONE! There are many, many of us who sew beautifully! Don’t assume that someone doesn’t know their craft!
I made a Jr. Bridesmaids and Flower Girls dress for my two daughters for my SIL wedding. I had several people ask me where I had purchased them, they wanted to purchase them also!
For the sister who lost 100lbs. Does your family have a history of favoring your sister and making you feel like 2nd place? I’m guessing this is likely. I don’t know a single parent who wouldn’t be thrilled that one of their children made lifestyle choices that would add years and quality to their life.
If you make positive changes in your life, and your friends act like it is a personal attack against them, then consider: they are not your friends, they are using you as a prop, either to make themselves look better, or to make themselves feel better about their own issues.
When I got married the 1st time, I was 18 almost 19 hence not being married to him anymore lol, we didn't have a large budget. My soon to be SIL knew how to make flower arrangements so she made the flowers for the reception, my bouquet, and the candelabra. As for the reception, I most certainly think it should be included in part of the wedding planning. You just have to work with the budget you have. My mom,.aunt's, SIl were really good cooks and It was FAR from fancy but they all pitched in and made a buffet meal. We had chips, veggies, dip, meatballs, stuff like that to eat, and had punch, sweet tea and sodas to drink. I had a really pretty cake was that was yummy. We went to church with a lady that made cakes so that was her gift to us. We got married in the church we were members of, my SIL also played the piano and sang, my future FIL married us. So, yeah there are ways to make it work IF you want it. I did however buy my wedding dress from my cousin's then wife 😧🤔 shoulda thought that one through 🤣🤣 oh my Dad was in the Army so he had some of his his soldiers come and they stood at attn and after the ceremony my hubby and I walked under their crossed I believe it was rifles. :)
I went to my friend's wedding via livestream. My roommate had mishandled the bills and the electricity got cut off. It took the entire amount of the plane ticket I had saved to go to my friend's wedding to get the electricity turned back on. Thus, me living in Oregon, I could not attend a wedding in TN. We made it work out. I dressed up and everything. And just sat in my office hair in my room and attended via skype. BTW I am still friends with the newlyweds, but I ditched the roomie for someone who can actually adult.
Hi Charlotte, I'm Lisa! My daughter introduced me to your channel. Loving it and you.
Just wanna say something about weddings...When I married my honey and I had very little money. We invited our families and friends. We asked people to dress for a small wedding and be ready for fun. We had the ceremony in a small chapel and reception at the local firehouse. There was no alcohol, it was bring your own. Family understood and was okay with it. Well, no money right?! I asked the local Tech/vocational school if they'd make the wedding food (buffet). They were thrilled for the experience. We paid for all the supplies and picked it up the day before. The food was delicious by the way. (The cake looked not so grandiose but tasted wonderful)
The firemen heard about our lack of funds and bought a keg of beer and showed up in white shirts, red suspenders and Jean's and served all our guests. They were so generous.
We all celebrated our union and laughed and danced to a local DJ. Thirty-four years later, still married and in love. Everyone had a good time and no-one bought gifts they couldn't afford. The real gift was their attendance. My dress was not a bridal gown but suited me and my maid of honor, my sister, wore her favorite dress as did my bridesmaid. No stress, no worries, just love.
Wishing you love and a beautiful life!
My mother made the most beautiful burgundy velvet bridesmaid dresses for my sister's wedding that people thought that they had been made by a bridal specialist. My sister was and is still beautiful but on her wedding day she was radiant and her dress was also designed and created by my sister and my mom. I have such a talented family! My other sister is also an excellent seamstress and knowing that they have all the talent in the family is fine with me. I have four sons who wouldn't care if I tried to make their clothes but alas, I have no talent in that direction.
And the chick with the tooth…..she’s more embarrassed about it than the bride would be. I truly hope the bride doesn’t mention it to her, it will only make her feel worse. Trust me, I have horrid teeth due to a rough pregnancy and depression topped off with no dental insurance.
Unless the bride actually wants to pau for the dental work and will try to make the bridesmaid feel better.
And photoshop can fix that tooth for the pictures.
We went through a pile of crap from my mum before our wedding. As we saved and paid for it, it meant we had 100% control and so we had no bridesmaids etc but dressed my best friends daughter up in a dress like mine (she was only around 4 yrs old and our nephew wore a lovely waistcoat (he was 18 moths old). They had special photos with just us so it was an extra special time for them. We even had relatives walk out at the evening do and still had an amazing time. You can’t let stress dictate your thoughts and poor decisions. It’s not worth the hassle. We celebrate 29 years together next year x
My husband and I spent 46 dollars to get married at the JP. We didn't want to deal with all of the drama. We did have a little family BBQ to celebrate with family. It's been 9 years and I still have no regrets about not having a huge wedding.
The first story got me heated. 1) If someone loses weight, and makes healthier choices that’s great I’m trying to do the same as family you should be happy for them. 2) Family should not take sides cause that is where things get out of hand.
Their reaction clearly shows any previous comments they ever made on the sister's weight was never out of concern for health - otherwise they would indeed be happy for her. Disgusting.
Now I understand why we have dedicated community centres and we deck the bride with an awful lot of jewelry so that everyone knows who's wedding it is and nobody can actually upstage the bride. Some of the jewelry is wedding specific, so there's no bridezilla tendency for keeping oneself at the center of attention. And the venue being a neutral zone (not the best man's house for example) doesn't create any problems.
Lol desi weddings. You can't upstage, even if you try.
I've been apart of 3 weddings and in all 3 of them, the brides were wonderful. Two of them good friends of mine (one who still remains like a sister), and the 3rd was my sister in law. Having these experiences leave me BAFFLED by Bridezillas. But also entertained 🤣
The person who posted about their groom's 5 year old son made me really sad. When I was 11 I went to visit my mom in Oregon for the Summer. I lived with my dad in California. Because of my age, plus I was a young 11, my mom emotionally manipulated me and I told my dad I wasn't coming back to live with him. And my mom didn't do this because she missed me and wanted to spend time with me, I think she did it because she wanted to prove to herself that I loved her more than I loved my dad. Anyway, my dad got pissed, at me. Hardly talked to me for years and I rarely saw him. He saw it as me rejecting him and nothing else. Yup, I'd really rather live with my mom and her pedophile boyfriend. I'd lived with my mom and this boyfriend before so I knew I wasn't safe but I couldn't go against my mom because I wanted her to love me. What is wrong with adults not seeing children as children??
The one person that didn't want her wedding photos marred by having someone with a bad tooth in them, isn't that an easy fix for a photographer? Of course given the tone of her post she strikes me as one of those people who wouldn't want to pay a photographer what they are worth.
I am so sorry you had to endure that. You in no way deserved that behavior from every adult in your family. I hope you have processed your pain and are living your best life now. Too many adults are really just selfish toddlers inside.
I hope you have a good relationship with your dad now. And about your mom, I really don´t know what to say, it makes me so angry that you had to suffer living with a pedophile because she was just plain selfish.
@@sonjebianca2483 thank you for your kind words. I'm 59 now and while I have done therapy for a long time I don't know if I ever truly processed my childhood. I think the fact that even though I had a relationship in my 20s, he was a slimeball, I've have never had another relationship. But I'm okay with it and I'm content. What I find interesting, is that now that I'm much older, I would like to speak to my mom and dad. I'd like to know what had happened to them and how they felt when I was a child. It wasn't until my 50s, I'm really slow sometimes 🤦♀️, when I realized that my parents would have struggled with their own types of emotions and feelings as I have as an adult. It took me way too long to think of them as individual people and not just parents.
@@Vayeya1 thank you. Both of my parents are dead now. The irony is that the last 10 years, or so, of my mom's life I took care of her. Not to the point that I lived with her and took care of her, I don't think I could of done that. But I handled her finances and I had medical power of attorney and I took her to all of her medical appointments. Eventually I had to move her into Adult Foster Care when she couldn't live alone anymore. I can't say we ever reconciled as she wasn't mature enough for me to ever have that kind of conversation plus she was narcissistic. The odd thing now is that I would like to have serious conversations with each of them just to see if I could understand what life was like for them. 🤷♀️
@@margaretakins6829 Not how the human brain works. Hush.
Charlotte roasting bridezillas is my new favorite thing. Omg everything she does is really sooooooo funny. 😂
Imagine thinking you’re special enough to where someone loses 100 pounds for you 😂
Charlotte, your face is the primary reason I watch these. You’re also hilarious but watching you smile and laugh is what truly brightens my day.
I get the feeling she was an acting student. She’s very funny.
@@deniseberman8633 she mentioned before that she do actually do acting
Weddings are only as stressful as you make them. In the long run, that one day isn't nearly as important as people make it out to be.
My wedding was in a public park (you can reserve the gazebo there for free). I got my dress at a second hand dress shop. The decorations were leftovers from my SIL's wedding. And we had maybe 15 - 20 people there. My husband and I still got married. Just as married as someone who spent hundreds of thousands on their wedding. And I barely had to think of anything at all. It was funny, we were all at the park, and my FIL had to run home and get the rings, marriage license, and bouquet. We forgot them at home when we left. It was hilarious.
Hearing these stories and reading comments makes me so glad the one wedding ive been in went off smoothly. It was my sister's wedding. She asked my other sister to be her MOH and asked me afterwards if i was okay with that and if i was mad. I looked at her and said "I really don't want to have all the responsibilities of being a MOH, nor do I have the mental capability to do it right now, plus yall are closer, i am not at all upset". At the time of her wedding i was in college full time, working part time, then volunteered in the church she was getting married in a good bit all on top of being in a relationship. Outside of the relationship, my days were regularly 7 am to anywhere between 9 and 11 pm depending on work and church schedules (i sang in the choir, played in several of the musical ensembles, was very active in the college ministry, etc). I did not have the mental capacity or physical energy to be her MOH. How i survived being a bridesmaid is still beyond me. Hearing stories like this make me terrified for when i get married. Im hoping my future bridesmaids are with me enough to not have any major conundrums that are within their control. However, breakups, fluctuation in appearance, pregnancy, whatever, those dont matter. That stuff is out of control and i refuse to spend my future wedding day stressing about that kinda stuff. I'll work with them if they work with me
the 28-year-old female sister who lost weight is not the a-hole, her family is toxic though. she has been saying that she made healthy a choice throughout the whole freaking year how is she in a hole just because you want to be healthier
Charlotte never disappoints and she makes my day a little bit better every time
Full agreement
same. :)
Agree👌
I fell in love with a prices if art in 1975 at age 16. It was in the artists home. It was her Master's prices for her Masters of Art degree. "A STUDY IN WHITE," my mother bought it as a housewarming gift from the artist when I bought my house in 2004
When my friend got married it staed in the invite that the fee for the food and drinks was the wedding gift to them. I live in Sweden though, we're a lot less traditional here than in the US where it just seems like SUCH a huge deal. Everyone paid around 50 USD and got a three course meal, wine with that and cake. I'd say that's pretty decent.
Hell, that's cheaper than a lot of wedding gifts. And a great deal on four courses and wine. I should move to Sweden.
@@amyg9518 Yup, the bar wasn't free though, but that's not very common here.
I was working 55+ hour weeks when I was planning my wedding. I picked my dress out & the color of my 2 bridesmaids and told my mom to have fun planning & she done fabulous & so glad I didn't have to deal with it.
My daughter got married last year and she catered her own reception and everyone enjoyed it everything was provided for except the alcohol, nonalcoholic drinks were provided if they wanted alcoholic drinks they'd have to pay for it themselves, she even provided vegan/vegetarian options
No wedding is worth destroying relationships and starting off in debt. Figure out what is in your means, and be as creative as you can within it. Don’t be a bridezilla, please! ☺️💗💗💗💗
I agree with the live stream thing. I lost my brother and his wife last year, I live 1500 miles away from the rest of my family. My wife and I could not make it for obvious reason. After asking, the church live streamed the services for those of us could not make it.
I'm terribly sorry for your loss. I'm glad you were able to see the live stream and stay safe. Sending strength, support and love to you and your family.
That bride that is upset about a homemade dress should realize someone makes everything!
Right? Usually home made is even better quality. My mother has made some beautiful clothes and has made a dress for an event. It was a lot of work and earned the nickname “pain in the butt” lol. I mean fabric and color choices can make it ugly but actually making it is by no means nasty or tacky. Anymore fabric can cost a lot of money. I quilt and just some of the fabric has cost hundreds of dollars when you buy several yards and it’s $16.99 a yard. It’s been crazy to see how much this hobby costs lol.
At my wedding ceremony we had 2 witnesses, my dress was from a website I ordered the day before (I wasnt even stressed about it) we had a bbq after with about 30 people and it was such a wholesome day and night 🥰 all in all we spent about £200 in total and wouldn't have changed it for anything!
Yes my wedding was just like this and my father in law married us he was justice of the peace
I don't get how weddings could be so stressful. My bride and I just walked into a city hall after booking the time and got married in 30 minutes. There was no stress at all. Our 5-year anniversary is in 3 months.
That’s what we did. I never had fantasies of big weddings, especially after witnessing so many divorces and the expense their fathers paid for.
I think there's a big different between getting married at the city hall and doing the entire wedding event.
However I do think it's sad how much people obsesse over the day to the point where they no longer are able to even enjoy it.
We really wish we had done that! My fiancé and I wanted to elope, but our families (a.k.a, my mother!) guilted us into having a big family wedding. The wedding is in 3 weeks and the whole planning process has been nothing short of an ordeal. At least it’ll be over soon!
It was easy for you b/c you didn’t involve three hundred people in you’re wedding. The more people, the harder it becomes.
My dad got married without me knowing and we found out by family. I was a kid. I’m now 37 and even though I’ve healed I can say I was very resentful for a long time about it
On the topic of children: I always hated children until I volunteered to my aunt's friends to babysit her 4 yo boy and 2yo girl. Ever since seeing them daily for those months I absolutely adore them, it's frankly amazing how well you can speak to kids that young as long as you have patience and understand that they will need a lot of explaining. They may be irrational and a pain in the butt, but they are intelligent human beings and if you treat them with the respect any person deserves, they will grow up to be better people.
We asked our guests to pay for their meals instead of a gift as we already had everything we needed and everyone was fine with it and loved the food. It wasn’t expensive for them, it was a buffet and they all commented how great the food was and it saved us from our biggest wedding expense 💗
With the cheating man of honor, and the wedding being at his house, he's using a power play because he controls the venue.
So, heres my brainstorm idea:
Get a new venue and king the man of honor out! She will be forever greatful that you picked her.