I believe drinking Bud Light is rock bottom for hollow feelings. Unless the beer is wheat or hops flavored -- then it's even worse (the ONLY worse beer flavor than wheat... is hops...)
My uncle was a professional photographer. We spent a summer camping in the Canadian Rockies and watching him take photos I noticed something odd. Many times he would put the camera to his eye and then put it down. Now I'm no visual artist, and certainly not a professional photographer, but for some of those instances I could see what he was looking at and why it was interesting. Some of those shots would be spectacular. After a week or so of this I asked him "Why didn't you take that picture? " after he'd pointed his camera at some piece of ridiculously scenic mountainside and then didn't press the shutter release. His answer has stuck with me these last twenty years, it very much informs how I see the creation of music. He said: "I've been doing this a long time and I know exactly how that picture would look. I know how I'd crop, process, and frame it. [this was in the age of film and darkrooms] I've done all the work; I don't need the object." Art is the creative process, and unless you plan on sharing that art with people not present at its creation the object that comes of process is unessential. I do live looping and much like the mandala painters there's nothing left but the memories once I switch off my gear. I love that, and it was my uncle nudged me into this mindset all those years ago. I wish he'd lived long enough for me to thank him for that.
My pleasure, literally. I'm unreasonably happy that you like it for two reasons. First, your videos have taught me things about music that I didn't know despite having spent that last quarter century or so obsessing about music making. And that teaching has come in a very entertaining way. It's great to be able to give something back, however small. And more importantly, my uncle was a fantastic human being. He lived in apartheid South Africa. He not only manage to not be a racist asshole, he raise three kids all of whom are also not racist assholes. He told fantastic stories of close encounters with hippos, lions, and elephants that seemed to come from a world that was impossibly far from my urban North American existence. He was generous of spirit and mischievous in a way that delighted me as a child and filled me with a desire to be a better person as an adult. I'm so very glad that a tiny part of who he was has spread out into the world in a positive way. Thanks Adam. All the best.
Actually the line in the movie is : - [They are on a mountaintop, watching a snow leopard that Sean is trying to photograph.] Walter Mitty: Are you going to take it? Sean O'Connell: Sometimes I don't. If I like a moment, for me, personally, I don't like to have the distraction of the camera. I just want to stay in it. Walter Mitty: Stay in it? Sean O'Connell: Yeah. Right there. Right here. Although Fossil Fishy's story has a similar setting, the underlying message is different.
*me:* oh boy adam's gonna talk about his senior recital *adam:* and so the only way you can truly find joy in this godless world where all is eventually destroyed is to detach your urge to create from your urge to have created and discard the latter, lest you never find happiness in what you do *me:* oh
I am only happy than when I’m metaphorically pushing boulders up hills. Sometimes, given my job, the metaphor is almost literal, as I do quite often have to push things up a hill, only for people to bring them straight back down again.
Huh. This definitely applies to a LOT more than music. I've been burning out as a mathematician - another creative (yes, creative) profession with a lot of focus on the end product. Thanks for the reminder to focus on the virtue & joy of the process!
Speaking as a church organist who performs every sunday, I feel like every week is the story of Sisyphus for me; Every monday is walking back down the mountain. Every sunday the rock slips through my fingers. I've come to try to focus on enjoying the process. The work, as you put it.
My experience is in producing high school musicals with talented kids. They always want it to last forever, but one of the most satisfying things for me is to file that score away and reduce the glorious set to boards again, to use for next year. the impermanence of the stage musical is its attraction for me.
lmao, especially in church sense, if you don't enjoy in making music (we know why), then don't do it, the purpose of music in church have special place in musician's life
People who work in theatre really grasp the concept of letting your art go. The creative cycle is a very clear one in theatre. You decide what you want to do, gather a team to do it, build it, put all of the elements together, fix it, rehearse it, and perfect it. Then you perform it. Then literally tear it all down when it's over and throw it's broken pieces into a dumpster. It's an odd feeling when you first start doing it. It's easy to get completely wrapped up in a production emotionally and artistically and obsess to make the absolutely best production possible. You look forward to it so much. Then it happens, either lives up to your expectations or not, and then you destroy it. If you're sense of fulfillment comes from the final result it goes into the dumpster with the set. If it comes from the process of creating art, you've already moved on to another show.
My water colourist friends and I have a bonfire at the end of every year to burn paintings that didn't turn out right, were about a bad patch in your life; in general, just paintings we did that no longer "worked" for the particular individual. It's a way of letting go.
Same with marching band. Every season is just one shot at making your specific show, whether it's good or bad, as close to perfect as you can get it in hopes of winning whatever competitions you compete in. As soon as you're done competing, despite all of the blood, sweat, tears, and hours that went into it, that show will never be performed again.
I had the same feeling and experience as you had (from 1m50). When I was done studying music all I wanted to do after my study/college is to not make music for a while. After college I started my own music school teaching young and old to play piano and guitar so that I could make a living out of that. But making music, alone or together didn't interest me. For about a year I didn't practice nor play in a band or even for myself. Starting up a business kept me busy and all the spare time I had I worked as a mailman. My girlfriend tried to keep me playing but I wasn't motivated. In the summer a year later I started to get some music itches back. I started playing the piano again and even asked a few fellow musicians to join me make music again. It was then i realized (or rather discovered) that I needed to play music/make music to be happy. And not just on my own but also with other people who drive me to new levels. It's been about seven years now since I started my music school. It's been a great success! I've got my own place where I teach, and as a bonus I've got my own place to jam there too when I'm not teaching. I even record some music there. I'm in a band which I really enjoy! This Thursday we'll release our debut album on vinyl which I worked very hard on (composing and writing music, recording and producing it together with our lead singer). I enjoyed everything about it and really get your point about leaving it as is (it's 'destroyed'). But as a bonus, the girlfriend who supported me all the time is now my wife and we're expecting our first kid this august! Sometimes you just got to take a break from it all (or leave it all). In the end you'll end up a better man from it. Thanks for your video Adam!
you know this really really reminds me of the period in the Studio Ghibli film Kiki's Delivery Service where Kiki gets burned out from failure after attaching her self worth to her ability to do magic and takes time away to be in the woods with the art girl and the art girl more or less says something to this effect 💖
Well, as I'm wont to do, here's another novel-as-comment: I feel you, Adam. My senior recital was its own version of a shit-show. I had two musicians who came in intoxicated in one way or another (one stoned, the other drunk). Plans were to take the recordings of the group from the recital and use it to book some local contemporary jazz gigs. As it turned out, the recordings were pretty rough, even my solo stuff. There were some good moments, you might even go so far as to call them musical moments, but overall it was rough. I had a professor stop me in the halls asking to have a private conference about "which musicians to book for your gigs." I never actually ended up having that discussion. I knew where the conversation was headed. Ultimately I had made several glaring errors before even touching the bass or the pen to write the arrangements. The next couple of months were rough. I didn't have enough (or any) gigs to speak of (that were financially rewarding in anyway real way) and I didn't really want to touch my bass either. The guys I counted on to perform with were leaving town and I couldn't call the two from the recital who botched things, so I basically started showing up to every jam session I could think of. There was a period of isolation that lead to therapy, etc. A lot of "emotional turmoil," as it's sometimes called. A couple of years later and after a bit of debt, I started my own group. Some of the same stuff occurred at a few of the gigs (Florida is very different from New York and Boston if that hasn't been evident up to this point). I ended up disbanding the group, quitting more or less every original music project and focusing on making enough money to pay rent instead of heavy artistic endeavors. What I ended up finding out was that the work required to do these gigs that actually pay solidified a lot of fundamentals in my playing as well as opened my eyes to the things I needed to (and still do) work on as a musician. It may have seemed from the periphery that I "sold out" or just started doing "pop gigs," but I think I hit the wall that required me to reevaluate the kind of life I wanted to live as an artist and the kind of serious people I wanted to associate myself with. These are strange lessons people don't teach you in school and have little to do with the instrument or music itself. It's almost like learning to play the career and finding out what the fundamentals are that keep people from certain successes verses seeing things as (relative) failures. That's why I think your Camus discussion in the video is so important: there is a lot of grinding and stone-turning involved in music as a career beyond the art. I think this is more important to be reminded of than what scales to play over what chords or how to groove properly. The right people will push you in the right direction as much as the right music. I value what you have to say in these videos and appreciate that you make them happen. Thanks so much for sharing.
Can you please upload a full version of your tone poem (Myth of Sisyphus). Even before you mentioned the fact that you had written it, the background music had already caught my ears. It sounds pretty interesting
This exactly describes the process of creating software. If it weren't for deadlines a developer might continue to tweek code looking for that "perfect finish". But it's never finished. There's always something more to do or to add. It's a struggle to balance the artform of writing code or designing a screen with the need to push the end product out the door. And it truly is an artform... well written code can be as beautiful as a master composition on the staff. I never connected this analogy with music though... until now. There you go making me think again! Well done and thanks for a great thought provoking video!
So true! Honestly what I remember most from my Berklee recital is that the cd they gave me was blank. It was extra money for the video so I opted to just do audio and the "pro quality sound crew" forgot to record it. 4 years, an insane amount of money, and literally nothing to show from it. Well they did print up some nice programs.
Hi Adam, I am in my 60's and yes I have had a lot of experiences, good and bad of course but you are an absolute inspiration. I follow your channel and hope all others that do enjoy that same inspiration as you have a very wide talent and it goes well beyond playing bass. I felt inspired enough to leave a comment, something I have been wanting to do for a while. Thanks
While I get where you're coming from, I don't think that's entirely right. The Sisyphus and mandala metaphors imply that you start over from scratch each time. In my experience that isn't true. Sure you have to start over--new piece to learn, tune to tackle, tune to write, but each time you start anew you have the experience you gained from your previous projects. It's more like a continually ascending spiral, like a barbershop pole, than a stone that must be pushed up a hill repeatedly. For me, the real joy in music is when, having been forced to restart or revisit something, I realize that I have progressed even in some small capacity. P.S. LOVE your videos. You're my new favorite TH-camr
Ok, so how do you think the monks got so adept at their craft? How did Sisyphus have the physical and mental strength to keep pushing the rock up the mountain? Because, each time, they got more fluid, focused and finely tuned, which made each experience different for them.
Just to add (Ha! Not really...) to the conversation; Sisyphus got fucken SWOLE from constantly pushing that stone up the mountain. Each time he let the stone slip through his fingers he gazed upon his sweet, holy gains, smiled and ventured off down the mountain again. Knowing that he truly was 2SWOLE2CONTROL.
But Sisyphus didn't start from scratch each time. He had the knowledge, the experience, the strength building up each time and that's what eventually leads him to a kind of "satisfaction" with the universe as it is. The rock, and his whole punishment, became just the means to an end that he got to define.
No. I gain nothing from the endless futile toiling. My rock is very heavy, slippery and jagged. The mountain is cold and wet. Every time I feel the rock slipping away I am battered, grazed and left a bloodied pulp as I desperately struggle to keep it from escaping me. When I get to the bottom of the mountain, everyone I know is standing around the rock, ridiculing me and telling me to stop wasting my life.
From my experience as an IT admin, this seems to apply to every aspect of life you find rewarding or obvious to identify with as a person - in my case, work itself, work ethos, pride of craftsmanship, whatever you want to call it. Installing new equipment, configuring a new snazzy service or security feature, moving offices or replacing existing equipment - it might (or might not - more often the case) make an admin happy or proud for a while, but you then have to move to another task, then another, and then another. It's the work I put in it and the experience and knowledge that I gain that drives me personally and makes me proud of what I do. And as for the stone slipping through your fingers - ever had a bad stretch at work? Unpleasant co-workers? Sense of your every effort being pointless and wasteful? Well, welcome to adult life, son. Thanks for the vid man, it made it easier for me to express what I feel in life to other people - I just send them the link ;)
This video showed up at a really important time for me, it's really what I needed to hear. Thank you so much for helping me change my mindset about my art. I feel like this is an important life lesson that every artist or musician should hear. Thankyou for sharing your life experience and saving me from deep disappointment! (In fact half way through writing this comment it got deleted because the video was on auto play, I very much enjoyed the process of writing this comment again and seeing that the life lesson can even be applied here!)
Mr Neely,your profound quality ,as a human being; comes through as I pay attention to what your saying. The world is a better place with men like you out there.
Thank you for this, Adam. I've been in a downhill period for a while now, with a lot of projects in my mind that I'm afraid to start because I'm worried that my inexperience will make the finished product not as good as the idea. This helped clarify a lot of things for me. Thank you.
I love this video, all I think about when performing is the mistakes and how much hard work I put into it. This can make anything stressful when performing. The only thing we need to worry about is, practicing, but not at an excessive rate. Enjoying the music is the reason why we do what we do.
Adam, love your thoughts, energy and insight. G'day from us here in Queensland, Australia. 1) I teach high school classroom music and you have a solid fan base with my current year 12 students. 2) We regularly banter about your videos, they have provided excellent exposure to ideas and concepts that they would have other wise not encountered. 3) In regards to this video, what I love about music performance (in particular improvisation), is that it happens in the moment, and then it is gone. What happens happens. Mistakes, moments of enlightenment, and everything in between. The idea of a 'perfect' performance in a sense, does not exist, rather it captures in a moment of time the culmination of what is going on for the musician, their interaction with the material, and the audience. Similar in the comments you made about 4-33 in a Q&A post you made. So - here's my question: do you have any plans to come and hang out in OZ and inspire a bunch of switched on kids? (No expectations - don't worry - if this comment makes it to the next Q&A - cool - 15.1 seconds of fame).
Look, I know you probably won't see/read this, but dammit I gotta say it. This helped at the right time. I'm working on a masters degree and am attempting to continue research over the summer from home. It's.... not going well. Not that I can't produce results, it's more that I can't seem to find the fulfillment that previously drove me, and those results feel more an more mechanical. The excitement of creating a new idea has worn off, and now it's more like an assembly line of predetermined progress that is inevitably ripped to shreds on a more-or-less weekly basis. Every day leads to me uncovering misconceptions I previously had and while this is generally a good thing (all part of the process), when coupled with burnout and some anxiety toward the current situation of the world, it tends to make me feel less and less confident in the things I know. The concept of purpose has come up a lot lately and I keep wondering what the point is. Your words about the worth of your pursuit of music really resonate with me. I find myself going through a similar issue right now, and it's tough. Your personal experience seems to be pretty wrapped up in the creative/musical world, but I can say it happens in engineering as well. It's something that I wish was more openly discussed. As it stands right now, it feels shameful to admit a lack of passion, particularly considering the nauseating amount of money it takes to even go to college in the first place. I know some of my peers have experienced a similar feeling, but broaching the topic is generally avoided, especially if you might be within earshot of your advisor. So thank you for bringing it up, even if I'm discovering this particular video years late.
I really needed this. I'm in the summer before my senior year of college and have my own composition recital next April. It's been weighing heavily on me and I've felt like it needs to be perfect. Even though I've been writing all this music for it, I've been feeling less and less happy as the date gets closer. Your video helped me put everything in perspective. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing this inspirational story. My own senior recital at Berklee was a disaster, mainly because I decided to heavily feature the band I was in at the time, and not enough of what my major was (music synthesis). The sobering critique from my teacher reflected my poor decision which, at the time, I didn't fully appreciate or understand. I have, since then, wished I had done things much differently, but all I can do is learn from it and push my next boulder up the mountain.
Hi Adam, Long time subscriber. I had seen this video before years ago, but now it has much more meaning and relevance because I am now a Berklee Student majoring in music composition for film tv and video games. i still have 2 years to go and it has indeed been a grind. Oh yea did I mention that I'm a 67 year old married empty nester with 4 (now grown) children pursuing a dream. Thanks for your wisdom and insight. You're a young man with an old soul and I mean that in the best of ways. I've taught private piano and voice lessons over 25 yaars and was a jazz piano major 20 years ago at another college but since the family came 1st I had to drop out with only my Junior and senior recital and about 10 - 12 credit hours short of my degree. Jump ahead 20 years later and I decided to go for the gold medal and attend Berklee (Online). Thanks again, great insight.
I like the video (and your other ones), but I can't help pointing out that that's not what sand mandalas are about (if you've based your explanation of them on the Wikipedia article, it's kinda garbage, unfortunately). They're generally made over the course of several days, not weeks. Their construction is usually part of a larger ritual. As with other mandalas (e.g. painted ones), they serve as a residence for the deity of the ritual that's being performed (Buddhist mandalas are palaces seen from directly above). When the ritual is completed, the deity leaves the residence and it is swept away (this does symbolize impermanence, but it's not what the whole process is about - it's about the larger ritual). The sand that's swept up contains the blessings of the deity who resided in it (generally a Buddha), so the sand taken to a lake or river where it is poured into the water to bless the beings that live in it. I know us westerners really like the whole "it's about impermanence" angle because it makes it appeal more to our secular sensibilities, but it's only a small part of what it's about and it's not really something that would even occur to most Buddhists taking part in the ritual. It's about accomplishing whatever the ritual is meant to do, of being in the presence of a Buddha, and the blessings that they pass on to those taking part in the ritual and to other being through pouring the sand into a body of water. Anyway, you seem like the kind of nerdy guy who likes knowing things, so I thought I'd pass it along. Again, big fan of your channel :)
+Joe Chip Gotcha! Sorry if I was being simplistic with my explanation, but even if I was, that doesn't really change what sort of lesson we may take from it. Camus' essay on the Myth of Sisyphus has nothing to do with the artistic process (it's more on contemplating suicide and the human condition), but that doesn't mean the metaphor can't be applied elsewhere.
I too had the same erroneous mostly secular Western meaning of the mandala process that Adam has. I like the more accurate Buddhist picture of it that you have given me. God bless you for taking the time to write your post and educate me. Btw Adam I'm an amateur guitarist-hobbyist not a bass player but I love your videos and I'm a big fan of Rick Beato, too. Even though the videos are often "over my head " in terms of music theory I find that I almost always gain some little gem of music knowledge or life knowledge from each video. Keep the good stuff coming! Bach and roll, David 🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎸🎵🎶🎵🎶❤
I'm a senior (theater hobbyist but not a music major) from SUBURBAN MARYLAND and I am relating so much to these feelings. Thank you for sharing your story :)
I too, like those Buddhist monks, believe it's all about the process. Instead of writing music, or creating mandala, I brew beer! And when the beer is finished, I destroy it, in the most enjoyable way possible XD You should try it!
Hey Adam, I am about to finish my degree online with Berklee. It has taken me years of working and going part time online to get the credits together to walk in May. I have found that even just the process of getting better is what I find enjoyable. The process of improving and knowing I am improving year to year. There will always be better musicians and becoming comfortable with that and the fact that I can only control what I do changed everything for me. Great video. Shared it to the online degree FB group just now.
I really needed this. I am a casual musician (if even that) but am studying to be an architect, an incredibly competitive field as well. When faced with rejection of job applications or project presentations I feel like I have failed as a person because my outcomes didn't meet my own expectations or the expectations of those higher than myself. It is really refreshing to hear that the creative process is not as glamorous and beautiful as people might like to think. I feel that so often in Architecture as you might feel in music, the people who judge my work don't see the all-nighters, the endless cups of coffee that go behind each and every project. Even through the pain, being able to be part of the creative process that makes the world richer and more beautiful is enough for me. Here's to enjoying the creative process, regardless of the struggles. :)
As a current music major who struggles with depression on regular basis, regardless of the music, I want to say that this video was really insightful, and thank you for uploading it.
I just finished writing a project that took me a solid year of weekend warrior work. This video inspired me to change the album art. i.imgur.com/tsZ6JPa.jpg
One of the best, honest and transparent (bass) videos. Most content on the net tries to give you “shortcuts” to musicianship, and it’s impossible to get support with what the life and mental stage of a future musician looks like. Adam is a pioneer in openly discussing and sharing his experiences. I wish schools prepared me better for the “emotional state” of the musician.
I always enjoy checking out the videos you put on TH-cam. I was dealing with several depressive events in my life and had stopped playing bass/fell into a life-funk. The perspective, logic and brutal honesty, especially in this video, gave me the motivation to go back and start playing my electric fretless as a form of therapy and release. Thank you.
I have a question (not related to this video, but in general): I saw the movie "Whiplash" recently. I thought is was great, but also disturbing, for obvious reasons. Have you seen it? If so, what did you think? And is this "method" of "teaching" really a thing?
Nice video, Adam. I really enjoyed the philosophies you included. I'm a 2nd semester at Berklee, and I've definitely experienced many of the emotions you've described. There is joy to be found in the process, and that's what I've been trying to aim for recently. Nothing is ever first draft; creation constantly evolves - out with the old, in with the new. None of it is ever easy, but with each new experience you learn something new. The next rock will be lifted with more vigor and wisdom. And as we move forward, and those creations wither away, we must carry with us the satisfaction that breathes life into creation. I've warred with myself for so long because I couldn't find inner peace throughout the process. The desire for something to be 'whole', to feel 'complete', nearly drove me insane. And then, like you stated, the end result was unfulfilling. Being an artist can feel isolating at times - it often becomes a place where you are faced with self doubt, and all you ever focus on is where the journey will end. But it never ends. The story always continues. Chapters will conclude with weathered defeat or, if I may, victory, even. There are times when I wish the ascension wasn't so tiring, but then I realize I would be wishing away the joy that comes when you reach the next peak and see everything from above. I'm glad I saw this video. It spoke clarity into my journey. So thank you! I wish you all of the best as you move forward! To the both of us - may our hearts always be full of joy and our creations a sentiment to this truth!
I don't know if there is such a thing I English but in German we have a thing called "Sisyphusarbeit" meaning "Sisyphus work/task" which is a task that is useless but still seemingly unending. Ah it's awesome having a word for everything, thank you German language... :D
Thanks for making this video, Adam. I just finished music school and felt that same sort of way for a few months. Things are starting to look back up and my drive for making music is stronger than ever. This video didn't help me to see it, but it did reaffirm that this whole cycle is a part of life - especially the life of an artist.
I really needed this, Adam. I recently moved to Philly to make it as a musician here and it hasn't been going as well as I hoped. Thank you, again, truly.
I needed to hear ALL of that! I was in a bad place, but this changed my perception and understanding of what it is about writing, recording, and performing music that I enjoy. Thank you Adam!
Imagine that instead of the stone slipping from his fingers and falling down the mountain, imagine if there was a God who thanked him for that effort, and asked for another. One no longer needs to imagine Sisyphus happy - indeed, he IS happy. Because his work has meaning, even if the meaning is not immediately discerned. Same work, but no longer a meaningless meticulous Mandela. That would be interesting.
Thank-you Adam for making a video like this. Often the internet is filled by too much of the positive and the negative and/or the shades in between are filtered out. I've majored in electronic music and I'm almost finished studying composition here in Italy (10 years, only 4 to to... sigh). Every year I've had the opportunity to have a composition of mine performed and I quickly realized what you described in the video...you easily get burned out, and nothing turns out quite as you expected. As a composer the transition from paper/desk to the real world is hard, but it gets better. I used to get depressed after a recital obsessing over details and what I could have done, but it doesn't happen anymore. A couple of years ago my composition teacher quoted that exact myth to say not to wallow or obsess, I can only move forward and apply what I learned to something new. As Shostakovich once said: "A creative artist works on his next composition because he was not satisfied with his previous one."
Ok, I rewatched this, and while this did put me in a ten minute pit of depression, this was actually incredibly helpful in the end. I realized I care more about the destination than the journey and that's why I've been so miserable.
I just found your channel, and I've been watching your videos for an hour already. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with us! Also, I just finished my first year at Berklee. This video made me feel so much better about my path. Thank you!
Felt very much the same after the graduate exhibition was over and I finished my degree in Fine Art. Totally burnt out and empty as F-. I had worked very, very hard all those years towards graduation and then it was all over. Took me years to get over it, but I'm back on track these days. Not very succesful as an artist but at least I have my enthusiasm back for creating work. Glad you're back on track too, Adam, love the videos.
I'm a pretty novice guitar player and recently began writing my own music. After about 6 months of juggling school work and guitar I finally finished my first song and had the exact same experience. I thought I would get a whole lot of praise and admiration but no one really seemed to care. Surprisingly enough I came to the same conclusion as you adam... Great video, love your stuff.
It's so good when people explain complex feelings you have inside but never really understood why you had these or even how they work. I can now see clearer some disappointments I had and not feel terrible about them. Thank you Adam.
I'm glad you had this revelation, and generous to share it. It's truth. I'm only recently getting back into art after years of PTSD after burning out as an architect. I am working on knowing the right moment to abandon a project and move on to the next cool idea. It's liberating.
I loved this episode! As a former Berklee student who lived on Hemenway, still writing music, and am mom to a son composing/arranging in music school (he's a patron of yours)...I relate to so much of this. Thanks for finally making that aspect of Sisyphus really clear, reminding me how much I really do love the work of creating, how I need to just get into it. Thanks!
Adam, you just went to my house with last "burnout after the jazzschool gig" video and quoted this video there. I really needed your advice so much, thank you Adam. You help young musicians move forward way faster with such videos.
I know this video was made years ago but I just wanted to thank you for making this, I feel like lately my mindset for making art has been "I am going to make a story, and once I do I'll be content." This of course is not exactly what I thought, but it's pretty accurate. I think my eyes are a bit more open now. I think I should think about making art as "I am going to make a story, and once I do I'll make another one, whilst enjoying the process." Thank you for this video (though you and probably no one will ever see this comment), and this is one of the coolest outros I've ever seen before!
I enjoy listening to Adam talking about music. I'm no musician. I'm an artist. And as artist and listening to another artist discussing on never feeling content with the art produced is nice. The solution is to move over it and keep putting in the work every other time. It's easier said than done but it's something that I've to incorporate in my art-making.("...art is never finished. It is only abandoned.") Thank you so much for sharing this with us, Adam. You are a charm! Cheers :)
Thanks man, this video really helped, I've always second guessed myself about this stuff, this may sound "cheesy" but i noticed(also many other people before me, nothing special) that life, stars, planets, everything in the universe come out of chaos, order out of chaos, which seems stable and ever lasting to us, but this is a trick, as we are part of a decay, the entropy of the universe, we are a product of that entropy, the universe is expanding as we (life) grows, for it all (as far as we know) to end in the "heat death" of the universe. The Mandala is a really great example, another great video, keep up the good work.
This channel and video is more valuable for me being part-time drummer than any other drum channels around lol. Drummers just talk about technics, chops, fills and gears only which is the easiest part of being hobby or professional musician.
I spent this week working on a guitar arrangement for "Ave Maria", and I just played it in church for the first time today. I had some mistakes, and I criticized myself for when they happened, but the women that I perform with have absolutely loved it and didn't care about what I messed up with. They were simply glad to have heard it. So I'll just continue learning more repertoire because of that.
True inspiration, just deleted all my Logic Projects!
thats the spirit!
you're the GOAT lmaooo
Philipp Würzner LOOOOOOL
I just make backups to an USB-drive and wait for the technology/software to become obsolete.
Holy frick....I could never do that haha
"You will never be happy as a musician"
*nods and immediately smashes the like button*
ADAM NEELY'S LIFE LESSONS
hell yeah
A - DAM KNEE-LY'S LIFE LESSOOOOOOOOOOONS
***** YEH (deep voice)
*complicated bassline*
-LIFE-
A-DAM NEE-LY'S LIFE LESSOOOOOOOONS
this is probably my favorite video of yours. made me reflect on my own career as a bass player/orchestrator/and educator. thanks for posting this.
Pffft... Those Tibetan monks have it easy. I sometimes write out a whole TH-cam comment and then won't even post it.
Lol
This would be funnier if you hadn't posted i- oh wait
@@robott5177 that was profound
that made me cry a little
Oh my god yes
if you were drinking bud light you honestly can't expect anything but crushing depression
What is that thing in your profile picture?
Project DC3-018898 Dude...
I believe drinking Bud Light is rock bottom for hollow feelings. Unless the beer is wheat or hops flavored -- then it's even worse (the ONLY worse beer flavor than wheat... is hops...)
My uncle was a professional photographer. We spent a summer camping in the Canadian Rockies and watching him take photos I noticed something odd. Many times he would put the camera to his eye and then put it down. Now I'm no visual artist, and certainly not a professional photographer, but for some of those instances I could see what he was looking at and why it was interesting. Some of those shots would be spectacular.
After a week or so of this I asked him "Why didn't you take that picture? " after he'd pointed his camera at some piece of ridiculously scenic mountainside and then didn't press the shutter release. His answer has stuck with me these last twenty years, it very much informs how I see the creation of music.
He said: "I've been doing this a long time and I know exactly how that picture would look. I know how I'd crop, process, and frame it. [this was in the age of film and darkrooms] I've done all the work; I don't need the object."
Art is the creative process, and unless you plan on sharing that art with people not present at its creation the object that comes of process is unessential. I do live looping and much like the mandala painters there's nothing left but the memories once I switch off my gear. I love that, and it was my uncle nudged me into this mindset all those years ago. I wish he'd lived long enough for me to thank him for that.
+Fossil Fishy that's a really awesome story, I'll definitely remember that one! Thanks for sharing.
My pleasure, literally.
I'm unreasonably happy that you like it for two reasons. First, your videos have taught me things about music that I didn't know despite having spent that last quarter century or so obsessing about music making. And that teaching has come in a very entertaining way. It's great to be able to give something back, however small.
And more importantly, my uncle was a fantastic human being. He lived in apartheid South Africa. He not only manage to not be a racist asshole, he raise three kids all of whom are also not racist assholes.
He told fantastic stories of close encounters with hippos, lions, and elephants that seemed to come from a world that was impossibly far from my urban North American existence. He was generous of spirit and mischievous in a way that delighted me as a child and filled me with a desire to be a better person as an adult.
I'm so very glad that a tiny part of who he was has spread out into the world in a positive way.
Thanks Adam. All the best.
I can imagine music all I want, it wont feel the same as making it happen sonically.
Actually the line in the movie is : -
[They are on a mountaintop, watching a snow leopard that Sean is trying to photograph.]
Walter Mitty: Are you going to take it?
Sean O'Connell: Sometimes I don't. If I like a moment, for me, personally, I don't like to have the distraction of the camera. I just want to stay in it.
Walter Mitty: Stay in it?
Sean O'Connell: Yeah. Right there. Right here.
Although Fossil Fishy's story has a similar setting, the underlying message is different.
Great story!
Nothing says senior recital like existential dread and jazz.
Yes.
nothing says existencial dread like jazz
The real spicy jazz is the friends we made along the way
UwU
*me:* oh boy adam's gonna talk about his senior recital
*adam:* and so the only way you can truly find joy in this godless world where all is eventually destroyed is to detach your urge to create from your urge to have created and discard the latter, lest you never find happiness in what you do
*me:* oh
"One must imagine Sisyphus happy," writes the dude not currently pushing a boulder up a mountain.
What are youtube videos?
You can’t do it, only, for the paycheck promised when you reach the top.
One must imagine Sysyphus jagged.
Cyan Light 😅😂
I am only happy than when I’m metaphorically pushing boulders up hills. Sometimes, given my job, the metaphor is almost literal, as I do quite often have to push things up a hill, only for people to bring them straight back down again.
Huh. This definitely applies to a LOT more than music. I've been burning out as a mathematician - another creative (yes, creative) profession with a lot of focus on the end product. Thanks for the reminder to focus on the virtue & joy of the process!
What the fuck? How are you verified with only 1 subscriber?
@@windmillwilly He's a creative mathematician duhh
Speaking as a church organist who performs every sunday, I feel like every week is the story of Sisyphus for me; Every monday is walking back down the mountain. Every sunday the rock slips through my fingers. I've come to try to focus on enjoying the process. The work, as you put it.
My experience is in producing high school musicals with talented kids. They always want it to last forever, but one of the most satisfying things for me is to file that score away and reduce the glorious set to boards again, to use for next year. the impermanence of the stage musical is its attraction for me.
lmao, especially in church sense, if you don't enjoy in making music (we know why), then don't do it, the purpose of music in church have special place in musician's life
People who work in theatre really grasp the concept of letting your art go. The creative cycle is a very clear one in theatre. You decide what you want to do, gather a team to do it, build it, put all of the elements together, fix it, rehearse it, and perfect it. Then you perform it. Then literally tear it all down when it's over and throw it's broken pieces into a dumpster. It's an odd feeling when you first start doing it. It's easy to get completely wrapped up in a production emotionally and artistically and obsess to make the absolutely best production possible. You look forward to it so much. Then it happens, either lives up to your expectations or not, and then you destroy it. If you're sense of fulfillment comes from the final result it goes into the dumpster with the set. If it comes from the process of creating art, you've already moved on to another show.
My water colourist friends and I have a bonfire at the end of every year to burn paintings that didn't turn out right, were about a bad patch in your life; in general, just paintings we did that no longer "worked" for the particular individual. It's a way of letting go.
Same with marching band. Every season is just one shot at making your specific show, whether it's good or bad, as close to perfect as you can get it in hopes of winning whatever competitions you compete in. As soon as you're done competing, despite all of the blood, sweat, tears, and hours that went into it, that show will never be performed again.
@@trevorcarl9515 This is so true. Thanks for reminding me of some great memories.
I swear the most amazing gems on youtube have the least clickbaity names.
I had the same feeling and experience as you had (from 1m50). When I was done studying music all I wanted to do after my study/college is to not make music for a while.
After college I started my own music school teaching young and old to play piano and guitar so that I could make a living out of that. But making music, alone or together didn't interest me.
For about a year I didn't practice nor play in a band or even for myself. Starting up a business kept me busy and all the spare time I had I worked as a mailman. My girlfriend tried to keep me playing but I wasn't motivated.
In the summer a year later I started to get some music itches back. I started playing the piano again and even asked a few fellow musicians to join me make music again. It was then i realized (or rather discovered) that I needed to play music/make music to be happy. And not just on my own but also with other people who drive me to new levels.
It's been about seven years now since I started my music school. It's been a great success! I've got my own place where I teach, and as a bonus I've got my own place to jam there too when I'm not teaching. I even record some music there. I'm in a band which I really enjoy! This Thursday we'll release our debut album on vinyl which I worked very hard on (composing and writing music, recording and producing it together with our lead singer). I enjoyed everything about it and really get your point about leaving it as is (it's 'destroyed'). But as a bonus, the girlfriend who supported me all the time is now my wife and we're expecting our first kid this august!
Sometimes you just got to take a break from it all (or leave it all). In the end you'll end up a better man from it. Thanks for your video Adam!
you know this really really reminds me of the period in the Studio Ghibli film Kiki's Delivery Service where Kiki gets burned out from failure after attaching her self worth to her ability to do magic and takes time away to be in the woods with the art girl and the art girl more or less says something to this effect 💖
Well, as I'm wont to do, here's another novel-as-comment:
I feel you, Adam. My senior recital was its own version of a shit-show. I had two musicians who came in intoxicated in one way or another (one stoned, the other drunk). Plans were to take the recordings of the group from the recital and use it to book some local contemporary jazz gigs. As it turned out, the recordings were pretty rough, even my solo stuff. There were some good moments, you might even go so far as to call them musical moments, but overall it was rough. I had a professor stop me in the halls asking to have a private conference about "which musicians to book for your gigs." I never actually ended up having that discussion. I knew where the conversation was headed. Ultimately I had made several glaring errors before even touching the bass or the pen to write the arrangements.
The next couple of months were rough. I didn't have enough (or any) gigs to speak of (that were financially rewarding in anyway real way) and I didn't really want to touch my bass either. The guys I counted on to perform with were leaving town and I couldn't call the two from the recital who botched things, so I basically started showing up to every jam session I could think of. There was a period of isolation that lead to therapy, etc. A lot of "emotional turmoil," as it's sometimes called.
A couple of years later and after a bit of debt, I started my own group. Some of the same stuff occurred at a few of the gigs (Florida is very different from New York and Boston if that hasn't been evident up to this point). I ended up disbanding the group, quitting more or less every original music project and focusing on making enough money to pay rent instead of heavy artistic endeavors.
What I ended up finding out was that the work required to do these gigs that actually pay solidified a lot of fundamentals in my playing as well as opened my eyes to the things I needed to (and still do) work on as a musician. It may have seemed from the periphery that I "sold out" or just started doing "pop gigs," but I think I hit the wall that required me to reevaluate the kind of life I wanted to live as an artist and the kind of serious people I wanted to associate myself with. These are strange lessons people don't teach you in school and have little to do with the instrument or music itself. It's almost like learning to play the career and finding out what the fundamentals are that keep people from certain successes verses seeing things as (relative) failures. That's why I think your Camus discussion in the video is so important: there is a lot of grinding and stone-turning involved in music as a career beyond the art. I think this is more important to be reminded of than what scales to play over what chords or how to groove properly. The right people will push you in the right direction as much as the right music.
I value what you have to say in these videos and appreciate that you make them happen. Thanks so much for sharing.
This one felt particularly Vsauce-y in its conclusion. :P For real though, this gives me a new thing to think about as I'm writing music. Thanks!
he has a few of these.
Sym-Bionic Waffle Vsauce, Adam here
Discount vsause
Can you please upload a full version of your tone poem (Myth of Sisyphus). Even before you mentioned the fact that you had written it, the background music had already caught my ears. It sounds pretty interesting
This exactly describes the process of creating software. If it weren't for deadlines a developer might continue to tweek code looking for that "perfect finish".
But it's never finished. There's always something more to do or to add.
It's a struggle to balance the artform of writing code or designing a screen with the need to push the end product out the door. And it truly is an artform... well written code can be as beautiful as a master composition on the staff.
I never connected this analogy with music though... until now.
There you go making me think again!
Well done and thanks for a great thought provoking video!
I feel this is a lesson Richard M. Stallman needs to learn
first slide of my first programming lesson said "coding is a creative act" so yeah haha cool
It applies to other artistic endeavors as well. A quote I've heard attributed to George Lucas is "Films Are Not Released, They Escape".
So true! Honestly what I remember most from my Berklee recital is that the cd they gave me was blank. It was extra money for the video so I opted to just do audio and the "pro quality sound crew" forgot to record it. 4 years, an insane amount of money, and literally nothing to show from it. Well they did print up some nice programs.
Hi Adam, I am in my 60's and yes I have had a lot of experiences, good and bad of course but you are an absolute inspiration. I follow your channel and hope all others that do enjoy that same inspiration as you have a very wide talent and it goes well beyond playing bass. I felt inspired enough to leave a comment, something I have been wanting to do for a while. Thanks
HOLY SHIT IT ALL CAME BACK AROUND AT THE END, NOW I HAVE TO REWATCH THE ENTIRE THING
Adam Feely
Moist Towelettes came for the bass, stayed for the feels
@@aliidris657 This
@@aliidris657 :"(
Four years later, this video still hits just right on having perspective over one's art and creative process. Thank you Adam!
ayeee that's ma boi Camus
ayee dat's ma boi Nujabes,wit da Metaphorical Music album.
i only have 1 question for you,do you like the song Highs 2 Lows ?
That's funny since our english class read the myth of sysyphus 3 days ago
Nujabes, Adam Neely and Camus. Wow, seeing those names in the same page makes me happy and I don't actually know the reason.
Absurdism??
César Gutiérrez SAME HERE
Big thanks! I think this video came in the right moment for me :)
same here!
bartoniusz same
totally
THIS VIDEO WAS FUCKING ART
imho the plot twist at the end was tears worthy
That was unexpectedly deep
While I get where you're coming from, I don't think that's entirely right. The Sisyphus and mandala metaphors imply that you start over from scratch each time. In my experience that isn't true. Sure you have to start over--new piece to learn, tune to tackle, tune to write, but each time you start anew you have the experience you gained from your previous projects. It's more like a continually ascending spiral, like a barbershop pole, than a stone that must be pushed up a hill repeatedly.
For me, the real joy in music is when, having been forced to restart or revisit something, I realize that I have progressed even in some small capacity.
P.S.
LOVE your videos. You're my new favorite TH-camr
Ok, so how do you think the monks got so adept at their craft? How did Sisyphus have the physical and mental strength to keep pushing the rock up the mountain? Because, each time, they got more fluid, focused and finely tuned, which made each experience different for them.
Cate Frazier-Neely you tell him mom
Just to add (Ha! Not really...) to the conversation; Sisyphus got fucken SWOLE from constantly pushing that stone up the mountain. Each time he let the stone slip through his fingers he gazed upon his sweet, holy gains, smiled and ventured off down the mountain again. Knowing that he truly was 2SWOLE2CONTROL.
But Sisyphus didn't start from scratch each time. He had the knowledge, the experience, the strength building up each time and that's what eventually leads him to a kind of "satisfaction" with the universe as it is. The rock, and his whole punishment, became just the means to an end that he got to define.
No. I gain nothing from the endless futile toiling. My rock is very heavy, slippery and jagged. The mountain is cold and wet. Every time I feel the rock slipping away I am battered, grazed and left a bloodied pulp as I desperately struggle to keep it from escaping me. When I get to the bottom of the mountain, everyone I know is standing around the rock, ridiculing me and telling me to stop wasting my life.
From my experience as an IT admin, this seems to apply to every aspect of life you find rewarding or obvious to identify with as a person - in my case, work itself, work ethos, pride of craftsmanship, whatever you want to call it.
Installing new equipment, configuring a new snazzy service or security feature, moving offices or replacing existing equipment - it might (or might not - more often the case) make an admin happy or proud for a while, but you then have to move to another task, then another, and then another. It's the work I put in it and the experience and knowledge that I gain that drives me personally and makes me proud of what I do.
And as for the stone slipping through your fingers - ever had a bad stretch at work? Unpleasant co-workers? Sense of your every effort being pointless and wasteful? Well, welcome to adult life, son.
Thanks for the vid man, it made it easier for me to express what I feel in life to other people - I just send them the link ;)
This video reminded me of a quote my band teacher said “Musicians are often pleased but seldom satisfied”
Thank you for the much needed reminder!
this video's so real. it's kinda comforting in a way to know that this is just what to expect though.
This video showed up at a really important time for me, it's really what I needed to hear. Thank you so much for helping me change my mindset about my art. I feel like this is an important life lesson that every artist or musician should hear. Thankyou for sharing your life experience and saving me from deep disappointment! (In fact half way through writing this comment it got deleted because the video was on auto play, I very much enjoyed the process of writing this comment again and seeing that the life lesson can even be applied here!)
your videos are the only thing that make my mondays sweeter
Mr Neely,your profound quality ,as a human being; comes through as I pay attention to what your saying. The world is a better place with men like you out there.
thanks for this. timing couldn't be better.
After a recently failed audition this really made me feel some inspiration to get back out there. Love these videos so much
Came for the music, stayed for the wisdom.
Thank you for this, Adam. I've been in a downhill period for a while now, with a lot of projects in my mind that I'm afraid to start because I'm worried that my inexperience will make the finished product not as good as the idea. This helped clarify a lot of things for me. Thank you.
You might have just saved me from suicide.
Keith channel that energy man
Keith I'm at that age where, i could kill myself, but i honestly couldn't be arsed. i know I'm going to die soon anyway.
Chris Wilson hahaha
I'm with you, man. Gotta do some DMT first tho.
This is the best comment of this vid!!!
I love this video, all I think about when performing is the mistakes and how much hard work I put into it. This can make anything stressful when performing. The only thing we need to worry about is, practicing, but not at an excessive rate. Enjoying the music is the reason why we do what we do.
Adam, love your thoughts, energy and insight. G'day from us here in Queensland, Australia. 1) I teach high school classroom music and you have a solid fan base with my current year 12 students. 2) We regularly banter about your videos, they have provided excellent exposure to ideas and concepts that they would have other wise not encountered. 3) In regards to this video, what I love about music performance (in particular improvisation), is that it happens in the moment, and then it is gone. What happens happens. Mistakes, moments of enlightenment, and everything in between. The idea of a 'perfect' performance in a sense, does not exist, rather it captures in a moment of time the culmination of what is going on for the musician, their interaction with the material, and the audience. Similar in the comments you made about 4-33 in a Q&A post you made. So - here's my question: do you have any plans to come and hang out in OZ and inspire a bunch of switched on kids? (No expectations - don't worry - if this comment makes it to the next Q&A - cool - 15.1 seconds of fame).
+Chris Hollier hey man, good to hear! I would love to come over there, but there really aren't any plans yet. I'll keep you posted!
Look, I know you probably won't see/read this, but dammit I gotta say it. This helped at the right time. I'm working on a masters degree and am attempting to continue research over the summer from home. It's.... not going well. Not that I can't produce results, it's more that I can't seem to find the fulfillment that previously drove me, and those results feel more an more mechanical. The excitement of creating a new idea has worn off, and now it's more like an assembly line of predetermined progress that is inevitably ripped to shreds on a more-or-less weekly basis. Every day leads to me uncovering misconceptions I previously had and while this is generally a good thing (all part of the process), when coupled with burnout and some anxiety toward the current situation of the world, it tends to make me feel less and less confident in the things I know. The concept of purpose has come up a lot lately and I keep wondering what the point is.
Your words about the worth of your pursuit of music really resonate with me. I find myself going through a similar issue right now, and it's tough. Your personal experience seems to be pretty wrapped up in the creative/musical world, but I can say it happens in engineering as well. It's something that I wish was more openly discussed. As it stands right now, it feels shameful to admit a lack of passion, particularly considering the nauseating amount of money it takes to even go to college in the first place. I know some of my peers have experienced a similar feeling, but broaching the topic is generally avoided, especially if you might be within earshot of your advisor. So thank you for bringing it up, even if I'm discovering this particular video years late.
Wooow, total plot twist mind blow at the end.
I really needed this. I'm in the summer before my senior year of college and have my own composition recital next April. It's been weighing heavily on me and I've felt like it needs to be perfect. Even though I've been writing all this music for it, I've been feeling less and less happy as the date gets closer. Your video helped me put everything in perspective. Thank you.
thank you so much this explains alot about my mood lately
Thank you for sharing this inspirational story. My own senior recital at Berklee was a disaster, mainly because I decided to heavily feature the band I was in at the time, and not enough of what my major was (music synthesis). The sobering critique from my teacher reflected my poor decision which, at the time, I didn't fully appreciate or understand. I have, since then, wished I had done things much differently, but all I can do is learn from it and push my next boulder up the mountain.
It's so weird that so many people, in so many eras of time and in so many wildly different places, can all have something to say about the same thing.
Hi Adam, Long time subscriber. I had seen this video before years ago, but now it has much more meaning and relevance because I am now a Berklee Student majoring in music composition for film tv and video games. i still have 2 years to go and it has indeed been a grind. Oh yea did I mention that I'm a 67 year old married empty nester with 4 (now grown) children pursuing a dream. Thanks for your wisdom and insight. You're a young man with an old soul and I mean that in the best of ways. I've taught private piano and voice lessons over 25 yaars and was a jazz piano major 20 years ago at another college but since the family came 1st I had to drop out with only my Junior and senior recital and about 10 - 12 credit hours short of my degree. Jump ahead 20 years later and I decided to go for the gold medal and attend Berklee (Online). Thanks again, great insight.
I like the video (and your other ones), but I can't help pointing out that that's not what sand mandalas are about (if you've based your explanation of them on the Wikipedia article, it's kinda garbage, unfortunately).
They're generally made over the course of several days, not weeks. Their construction is usually part of a larger ritual. As with other mandalas (e.g. painted ones), they serve as a residence for the deity of the ritual that's being performed (Buddhist mandalas are palaces seen from directly above). When the ritual is completed, the deity leaves the residence and it is swept away (this does symbolize impermanence, but it's not what the whole process is about - it's about the larger ritual). The sand that's swept up contains the blessings of the deity who resided in it (generally a Buddha), so the sand taken to a lake or river where it is poured into the water to bless the beings that live in it.
I know us westerners really like the whole "it's about impermanence" angle because it makes it appeal more to our secular sensibilities, but it's only a small part of what it's about and it's not really something that would even occur to most Buddhists taking part in the ritual. It's about accomplishing whatever the ritual is meant to do, of being in the presence of a Buddha, and the blessings that they pass on to those taking part in the ritual and to other being through pouring the sand into a body of water.
Anyway, you seem like the kind of nerdy guy who likes knowing things, so I thought I'd pass it along. Again, big fan of your channel :)
+Joe Chip Gotcha! Sorry if I was being simplistic with my explanation, but even if I was, that doesn't really change what sort of lesson we may take from it. Camus' essay on the Myth of Sisyphus has nothing to do with the artistic process (it's more on contemplating suicide and the human condition), but that doesn't mean the metaphor can't be applied elsewhere.
I agree :) I just thought I'd take the opportunity to pass on a more accurate/in depth explanation of what they're about because I'm a nerd :P
Got any Joe Chip money? I'll trade you some Glen Runciter bucks straight across.
I too had the same erroneous mostly secular Western meaning of the mandala process that Adam has. I like the more accurate Buddhist picture of it that you have given me. God bless you for taking the time to write your post and educate me.
Btw Adam I'm an amateur guitarist-hobbyist not a bass player but I love your videos and I'm a big fan of Rick Beato, too. Even though the videos are often "over my head " in terms of music theory I find that I almost always gain some little gem of music knowledge or life knowledge from each video. Keep the good stuff coming!
Bach and roll,
David
🎵🎶🎵🎶🎵🎶🎸🎵🎶🎵🎶❤
I'm a senior (theater hobbyist but not a music major) from SUBURBAN MARYLAND and I am relating so much to these feelings. Thank you for sharing your story :)
I too, like those Buddhist monks, believe it's all about the process. Instead of writing music, or creating mandala, I brew beer! And when the beer is finished, I destroy it, in the most enjoyable way possible XD You should try it!
Hey Adam, I am about to finish my degree online with Berklee. It has taken me years of working and going part time online to get the credits together to walk in May. I have found that even just the process of getting better is what I find enjoyable. The process of improving and knowing I am improving year to year. There will always be better musicians and becoming comfortable with that and the fact that I can only control what I do changed everything for me. Great video. Shared it to the online degree FB group just now.
dude, you're from Bethesda?!
Jason Lieberman DMV FAM WE OUT HERE 🙅🙅🙅
DMV? Department of Motor Vehicles?
ssrrapper DMV = DC/Maryland/Virginia
Thank you!
I really needed this. I am a casual musician (if even that) but am studying to be an architect, an incredibly competitive field as well. When faced with rejection of job applications or project presentations I feel like I have failed as a person because my outcomes didn't meet my own expectations or the expectations of those higher than myself. It is really refreshing to hear that the creative process is not as glamorous and beautiful as people might like to think. I feel that so often in Architecture as you might feel in music, the people who judge my work don't see the all-nighters, the endless cups of coffee that go behind each and every project. Even through the pain, being able to be part of the creative process that makes the world richer and more beautiful is enough for me. Here's to enjoying the creative process, regardless of the struggles. :)
Your story reminded me of Rachmaninoff's first symphony premiere
Haven't seen this intro in a long time. Glad it's back ;)
Adam Neely's Life Lessons.
As a current music major who struggles with depression on regular basis, regardless of the music, I want to say that this video was really insightful, and thank you for uploading it.
I just finished writing a project that took me a solid year of weekend warrior work. This video inspired me to change the album art.
i.imgur.com/tsZ6JPa.jpg
One of the best, honest and transparent (bass) videos. Most content on the net tries to give you “shortcuts” to musicianship, and it’s impossible to get support with what the life and mental stage of a future musician looks like. Adam is a pioneer in openly discussing and sharing his experiences. I wish schools prepared me better for the “emotional state” of the musician.
Doo-wap, daaaaa, do-wap daaa de-ba-de-bum-e-ba-de-bowwww....
*_BASS_*
I always enjoy checking out the videos you put on TH-cam. I was dealing with several depressive events in my life and had stopped playing bass/fell into a life-funk.
The perspective, logic and brutal honesty, especially in this video, gave me the motivation to go back and start playing my electric fretless as a form of therapy and release. Thank you.
I have a question (not related to this video, but in general):
I saw the movie "Whiplash" recently. I thought is was great, but also disturbing, for obvious reasons. Have you seen it? If so, what did you think? And is this "method" of "teaching" really a thing?
he uploaded a video on Whiplash if you haven't seen it yet
Nice video, Adam. I really enjoyed the philosophies you included. I'm a 2nd semester at Berklee, and I've definitely experienced many of the emotions you've described. There is joy to be found in the process, and that's what I've been trying to aim for recently. Nothing is ever first draft; creation constantly evolves - out with the old, in with the new. None of it is ever easy, but with each new experience you learn something new. The next rock will be lifted with more vigor and wisdom. And as we move forward, and those creations wither away, we must carry with us the satisfaction that breathes life into creation. I've warred with myself for so long because I couldn't find inner peace throughout the process. The desire for something to be 'whole', to feel 'complete', nearly drove me insane. And then, like you stated, the end result was unfulfilling. Being an artist can feel isolating at times - it often becomes a place where you are faced with self doubt, and all you ever focus on is where the journey will end. But it never ends. The story always continues. Chapters will conclude with weathered defeat or, if I may, victory, even. There are times when I wish the ascension wasn't so tiring, but then I realize I would be wishing away the joy that comes when you reach the next peak and see everything from above. I'm glad I saw this video. It spoke clarity into my journey. So thank you! I wish you all of the best as you move forward! To the both of us - may our hearts always be full of joy and our creations a sentiment to this truth!
I don't know if there is such a thing I English but in German we have a thing called "Sisyphusarbeit" meaning "Sisyphus work/task" which is a task that is useless but still seemingly unending.
Ah it's awesome having a word for everything, thank you German language... :D
Thanks for making this video, Adam. I just finished music school and felt that same sort of way for a few months. Things are starting to look back up and my drive for making music is stronger than ever. This video didn't help me to see it, but it did reaffirm that this whole cycle is a part of life - especially the life of an artist.
One day, you learn that a composition is not good unless it's still good when played with more than a few mistakes.
I really needed this, Adam. I recently moved to Philly to make it as a musician here and it hasn't been going as well as I hoped. Thank you, again, truly.
3meta5me
Woah Woah Woah
was feeling down bc of a terrible recital experience, this was just what I needed. thank you.
So how did you even manage to pay for Berklee education?
Bass prostitution
Bass prostitution bro
Loved this. Thanks for sharing your insight. So many people need to hear this.
Great stuff. Now go tell George Lucas. :D
I needed to hear ALL of that! I was in a bad place, but this changed my perception and understanding of what it is about writing, recording, and performing music that I enjoy. Thank you Adam!
Imagine that instead of the stone slipping from his fingers and falling down the mountain, imagine if there was a God who thanked him for that effort, and asked for another. One no longer needs to imagine Sisyphus happy - indeed, he IS happy. Because his work has meaning, even if the meaning is not immediately discerned. Same work, but no longer a meaningless meticulous Mandela.
That would be interesting.
Thank-you Adam for making a video like this. Often the internet is filled by too much of the positive and the negative and/or the shades in between are filtered out. I've majored in electronic music and I'm almost finished studying composition here in Italy (10 years, only 4 to to... sigh). Every year I've had the opportunity to have a composition of mine performed and I quickly realized what you described in the video...you easily get burned out, and nothing turns out quite as you expected. As a composer the transition from paper/desk to the real world is hard, but it gets better. I used to get depressed after a recital obsessing over details and what I could have done, but it doesn't happen anymore. A couple of years ago my composition teacher quoted that exact myth to say not to wallow or obsess, I can only move forward and apply what I learned to something new. As Shostakovich once said: "A creative artist works on his next composition because he was not satisfied with his previous one."
This depressed me.
Ok, I rewatched this, and while this did put me in a ten minute pit of depression, this was actually incredibly helpful in the end. I realized I care more about the destination than the journey and that's why I've been so miserable.
I just found your channel, and I've been watching your videos for an hour already. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge with us!
Also, I just finished my first year at Berklee. This video made me feel so much better about my path. Thank you!
Felt very much the same after the graduate exhibition was over and I finished my degree in Fine Art. Totally burnt out and empty as F-. I had worked very, very hard all those years towards graduation and then it was all over. Took me years to get over it, but I'm back on track these days. Not very succesful as an artist but at least I have my enthusiasm back for creating work. Glad you're back on track too, Adam, love the videos.
I'm a pretty novice guitar player and recently began writing my own music. After about 6 months of juggling school work and guitar I finally finished my first song and had the exact same experience. I thought I would get a whole lot of praise and admiration but no one really seemed to care. Surprisingly enough I came to the same conclusion as you adam... Great video, love your stuff.
It's awesome to know someone who lives in your city, doing all your dreams. Now I know it isn't impossible.
Love the content Adam
Yes happiness comes from living in the now and enjoying the process of music! I appreciate your videos so much. Thank you Adam
It's so good when people explain complex feelings you have inside but never really understood why you had these or even how they work. I can now see clearer some disappointments I had and not feel terrible about them. Thank you Adam.
I'm glad you had this revelation, and generous to share it. It's truth. I'm only recently getting back into art after years of PTSD after burning out as an architect. I am working on knowing the right moment to abandon a project and move on to the next cool idea. It's liberating.
One of your best . . . don't be afraid to do more of these. Great job.
I loved this episode! As a former Berklee student who lived on Hemenway, still writing music, and am mom to a son composing/arranging in music school (he's a patron of yours)...I relate to so much of this. Thanks for finally making that aspect of Sisyphus really clear, reminding me how much I really do love the work of creating, how I need to just get into it. Thanks!
Adam, you just went to my house with last "burnout after the jazzschool gig" video and quoted this video there. I really needed your advice so much, thank you Adam. You help young musicians move forward way faster with such videos.
Keep spreading the love and light, man~ Thank you.
this is my favorite video of you so far. Thanks for sharing your experience and showing me the light at the end of the tunnel!
This is exactly what I needed to hear right now. Thank you, Adam.
I know this video was made years ago but I just wanted to thank you for making this, I feel like lately my mindset for making art has been "I am going to make a story, and once I do I'll be content." This of course is not exactly what I thought, but it's pretty accurate.
I think my eyes are a bit more open now. I think I should think about making art as "I am going to make a story, and once I do I'll make another one, whilst enjoying the process."
Thank you for this video (though you and probably no one will ever see this comment), and this is one of the coolest outros I've ever seen before!
Very insightful and inspirational. Great use of analogies to help is understand our own creative struggles. Thanks Adam!
I enjoy listening to Adam talking about music. I'm no musician. I'm an artist. And as artist and listening to another artist discussing on never feeling content with the art produced is nice. The solution is to move over it and keep putting in the work every other time. It's easier said than done but it's something that I've to incorporate in my art-making.("...art is never finished. It is only abandoned.") Thank you so much for sharing this with us, Adam. You are a charm! Cheers :)
Thanks man, this video really helped, I've always second guessed myself about this stuff, this may sound "cheesy" but i noticed(also many other people before me, nothing special) that life, stars, planets, everything in the universe come out of chaos, order out of chaos, which seems stable and ever lasting to us, but this is a trick, as we are part of a decay, the entropy of the universe, we are a product of that entropy, the universe is expanding as we (life) grows, for it all (as far as we know) to end in the "heat death" of the universe.
The Mandala is a really great example, another great video, keep up the good work.
This channel and video is more valuable for me being part-time drummer than any other drum channels around lol. Drummers just talk about technics, chops, fills and gears only which is the easiest part of being hobby or professional musician.
I really needed this man. Looks like you were able to learn something from your mishap. I think this is one my favorite videos you've done thus far.
I spent this week working on a guitar arrangement for "Ave Maria", and I just played it in church for the first time today. I had some mistakes, and I criticized myself for when they happened, but the women that I perform with have absolutely loved it and didn't care about what I messed up with. They were simply glad to have heard it. So I'll just continue learning more repertoire because of that.
Adam, that video was absolutely wonderful and spoke to me in so many ways. Inspiring content!