You know, that sounds oddly familiar. Oh wait! That was my Mac mini last year when the primary fans started making noise that no fan should ever make! It took an order from Amazon, and a little sided help for my roommate in order to get the problem fixed. Then the maintenance update hit. Stupid Mac mini! :-)
Definitely part of the "hold my beer" universe. Saving this in my folder between "I saw this in a cartoon once" and "how to parallel park a space station".
As a veteran maintenance guy, this is how it goes. Grumpy, disappointingly low levels of coffee, and still trying to track down who thought it would be a good idea to install a cheap valve in a critical location. Whoever wrote this one had to have been or have known a veteran maintenance guy. Too many check boxes hit otherwise!
I agree with Dave when he said, "you have a redundant program for a redundant program, but you don't have a rollback program?" I do have a rollback program called, "Rollback RX Pro" that is well worth the money.
I attended a Microsoft Seminar many years ago, they mentioned some new stuff was compatible with Windows 7 and Windows 10. They made it through the entire seminar without mentioning Vista and only said the V-word when the audience cornered them during Q&A. I concluded that even Microsoft wanted to forget that Vista existed. As they should. Windows Vista is the only release I worked with where network printing AND mapped drives did not work out of the box...or after the first major update.
CPU announcing alien invasion "with all the enthusiasm of a bored retail worker doing cleanup in aisle 7." 😂 As a worker whose co-workers are almost exclusively bored, that was a killer line.
This is the very BEST science fiction story and Video I have listened to and it made my day extremely better because this is the 1ST TIME in a long time that I have LAUGHED at the story in several different Places! I would HIGHLY RECOMMEND this Science Fiction Story to anyone who wants to have a Good Laugh because it's Worth it! Right On 😊
@@llovebleach6530 the ritual of preparing the coffee boat, pouring the first life-renewing mug, and inhaling the aroma as the dark elixir washes across the tongue is *sacred.*
So wahr. Ich habe Notstrom an unserer Kaffeemaschine. Eine Filtermaschine falls die eigentliche kaputt geht. Für Stromausfall über längere Zeit eine Möglichkeit auf dem Grill Kaffee zu kochen. Ich bradas Zeug 😮
Nobody that I know ever reads all that fine print. It’s easier just to click ok then it is to read two hundred pages of legal talk that is written so nobody understands it! Good story 👍👍👍
I read them. Well, I've read them so many times that I can "scan" through the text to look for anything out of place. Avoided installing mobile games that essentially make your phone a spy for the Chinese government (no, not joking) quite a few times by now...
This was extremely well written . It would make a great movie. I am going to recommend this one to friends. I actually know several “Dave,s” who act exactly like this guy 😅😅
I am feared in my industry, simply because I read. White papers, citations, Reddit references. But the reason I have been trotted out to receive awards… why my telephone number is safeguarded but liberally distributed to those in need? Why I’m described as indispensable? Why my title and business card, simply says, “Fixer”, and my telephone number… I read the instructions. I make a lot of money. A lot. Because I’m the knowledge base.
In my family I'm practically the only one who reads the instructions before use. Not just my own devices, but I read the manuals of other people's gadgets too, so that when they do X when they should be doing Y, I can tell them how to make it work. This doesn't apply to modems. I read the manuals, I do everything as instructed. They still don't work. One of my IT-CS friends or family members comes over, touches it, and it starts to work. I don't understand that. 😅
"Don't update if it's not breaking. Also, why aren't you running basic repairs regularly instead of only when something breaks? Also, why is your software outdated?" A non-self-aware engineer.
Coffee is the most important item in a maintenance person's life. Then that one tool that fixes everything, usually a multi tool. And we ALL hate the paperwork, though proper documentation of repair procedures are helpful...most times.
That depends on the industry you work in. I know people who read those as part of their work. (It's different when peoples lives actually depend on it.)
Thanks for posting this video, and thanks for the laughs! I laughed the hardest near the end when the computer said it would ake over 47 years to complete all of the updates! 😂😂😂 I do tend to go a while between updates, because it is annoying to have to wait through even one, but it's not a good idea to wait too long, or worse, to never co them at all. I have been guilty of waiting too long a few times and paid the price for it. I'm better at doing them more often now. I still wait a bit of a while, but will pick a good time to do it and find something to keep me occupied while it's going on. Anyway, it could be a lot worse. When I started using the internet, I had dial-up internet service and had to do my updates at dial-up speeds! 😂 Because of my personal update habits and dial-up memories, and the fact that this is happening to an alien invasion fleet, that part of this story cracks me up the most.😂
I've worked in home repair and HVAC on boilers and chillers and I can promise you yes you do learn the sounds and can hear that crap. A great in the back of your head and drives you insane so you can escape it. Big box stores are notorious for bad maintenance on their Air handlers and the belt squeaking and the bearings vibrating is horrible
It's been a long time since I laughed this hard... This brought back memories since i've been retired.... Even the paperwork filled out in triplicates... Simply loved this story...
Okay, but turning off and back on a computer DURING AN UPDATE is how you get one massive brick. That's why it says to not shut it down forcefully at those times
i had to admit id like this story .... got a little grit of Jett Reno , the carelessness of the 11th. Doctor and the gravity of a average screwturner...
I don't usually give feedback on syfy because most of it is questionable . I do like this one. It's possible. We haven't become a super race gust your selves.
Okay I'm about 2/3 of the way through the story and he's fixing their ships. Did he forget he was supposed to basically rig the ships to shut down or blow at Earth's discretion?
The ememy is here Yeah, well, they wont get far with thier systems failing. What did he say? I said you're in possession of breaking crap that is about to break. Can you come look? .... Yes? I, a representative of the enemy you intend to conquer, will come aboard and check your system.... For some stupid reason.
The difference between a okest engineer and an professional engineer. Is the okest can get it running with garbage where thr professional needs the correct part
21k views,,, 777 likes... yeah im just commenting and saving to playlist dubbed legendary videos, God bless Dave! Daisies...Daisy...Day-Z...Wont you pick some Daisy for me ;) *insert hot brunette alongside 6 generations of lifetime supplies of coffee here*... 20m later upon completion of video me who refreshes the page to double check. Windows :"YOU DIDN'T UPDATE"... me: fuck i just wanted aesthetic like to view count :/
"Something that sounded expensive made a noise that expensive things should never make." 😂😂 That's a great line! 😂
But they do make that sound. And the part is on back order.
You know, that sounds oddly familiar. Oh wait! That was my Mac mini last year when the primary fans started making noise that no fan should ever make! It took an order from Amazon, and a little sided help for my roommate in order to get the problem fixed. Then the maintenance update hit. Stupid Mac mini! :-)
@mike 14:10 😢 14:21 14:21 14:21 9 14:24 😢7 14:31 14:36 henthorn1778 13:34 13:38
Murphys law: If anything goes wrong, read the instruction manual.
I swear that line came just as I saw your comment 🤣 I just died
This retired maintenance/fixit guy absolutely LOVED this story.
Yep sound like my job... If it was broke.. and no one could fix it .. Someone came screaming into my office.
Definitely part of the "hold my beer" universe. Saving this in my folder between "I saw this in a cartoon once" and "how to parallel park a space station".
no, humans are too little respected in this one to be in that universe, might be one of the multiple universe that they created tho
"...they even game him a metal, though he mainly used it as a coaster for his coffee mug..." that one killed me.
tbf, its getting more practical use than most metals do.
gave him a medal*
As a veteran maintenance guy, this is how it goes. Grumpy, disappointingly low levels of coffee, and still trying to track down who thought it would be a good idea to install a cheap valve in a critical location.
Whoever wrote this one had to have been or have known a veteran maintenance guy. Too many check boxes hit otherwise!
"We will destroy you!"
"Your check engine line is on."
I agree with Dave when he said, "you have a redundant program for a redundant program, but you don't have a rollback program?" I do have a rollback program called, "Rollback RX Pro" that is well worth the money.
"... who wants to explain why your quantum core is running on what looks suspiciously like Windows Vista..." dying 🤣 can't breathe 😂🤣👉
@@graphixkillzzz nah, actually it's Windows 95...
I attended a Microsoft Seminar many years ago, they mentioned some new stuff was compatible with Windows 7 and Windows 10. They made it through the entire seminar without mentioning Vista and only said the V-word when the audience cornered them during Q&A. I concluded that even Microsoft wanted to forget that Vista existed. As they should. Windows Vista is the only release I worked with where network printing AND mapped drives did not work out of the box...or after the first major update.
As long as humans exist, they will never live down Vista 😂😂
If you work in maintenance yourself, you can understand Dave's situation very well.......😂😂😂
CPU announcing alien invasion "with all the enthusiasm of a bored retail worker doing cleanup in aisle 7." 😂 As a worker whose co-workers are almost exclusively bored, that was a killer line.
This is the very BEST science fiction story and Video I have listened to and it made my day extremely better because this is the 1ST TIME in a long time that I have LAUGHED at the story in several different Places! I would HIGHLY RECOMMEND this Science Fiction Story to anyone who wants to have a Good Laugh because it's Worth it! Right On 😊
Wow, thank you!
@@Sci-FiRealmnever piss off a space engineer/mechanic looks at isac Clark from dead space
nods head sagely
Just the story I needed, today was a chemo day. I haven't laugh like this 😁🤣🤣in a very long time. Thank You!😂🤣
Have to agree about the coffee. Do not mess with me during my first cup
Coffee, because “Get away from me before I rip your face off” is not socially acceptable……..
I have a cup that says a coffee a day keeps the grumpy away
@@llovebleach6530 the ritual of preparing the coffee boat, pouring the first life-renewing mug, and inhaling the aroma as the dark elixir washes across the tongue is *sacred.*
So wahr. Ich habe Notstrom an unserer Kaffeemaschine. Eine Filtermaschine falls die eigentliche kaputt geht. Für Stromausfall über längere Zeit eine Möglichkeit auf dem Grill Kaffee zu kochen. Ich bradas Zeug 😮
This is full of great lines. Kudos!
Excellent story, had me chuckling all the way through. 5 star.
Nobody that I know ever reads all that fine print. It’s easier just to click ok then it is to read two hundred pages of legal talk that is written so nobody understands it! Good story 👍👍👍
Blablabla first born child blablabla no liability blablabla it's made of sponges blablabla *clicks yes*
Even contract lawyers have a lot of difficulty understanding those infernal contracts
I read them. Well, I've read them so many times that I can "scan" through the text to look for anything out of place. Avoided installing mobile games that essentially make your phone a spy for the Chinese government (no, not joking) quite a few times by now...
Nothing like good old fashioned percussive maintenance.
Oh HELLS! I remember Vista! It was GHASTLY!
Everything after windows xp sucked as far as Im concerned.
maybe the minds behind the script will delve deeper into windows OS history and choose another system I heard was quite the "love/hate"
Yup it was Microsoft's foray into 32 bit technology, much like windows 95 was their foray into 16 bit technology
After Windows 95: 98, XP, 7, 10 and now 11. Learned to skip the crappy ones after 95. 😝
as a maintenance tech I giggled at the neglecting of paperwork in favor of getting something important done quickly
Dave needs a series.
😆
Aliens sent their Greatest warriors.
Humans sent... One angry mechanic with a wrench...
Yeah those aliens were doomed from the start
Not even just a wrench, a tablet and a trust multi tool
This was extremely well written . It would make a great movie. I am going to recommend this one to friends. I actually know several “Dave,s” who act exactly like this guy 😅😅
I am feared in my industry, simply because I read.
White papers, citations, Reddit references.
But the reason I have been trotted out to receive awards… why my telephone number is safeguarded but liberally distributed to those in need? Why I’m described as indispensable?
Why my title and business card, simply says, “Fixer”, and my telephone number…
I read the instructions.
I make a lot of money.
A lot.
Because I’m the knowledge base.
In my family I'm practically the only one who reads the instructions before use. Not just my own devices, but I read the manuals of other people's gadgets too, so that when they do X when they should be doing Y, I can tell them how to make it work.
This doesn't apply to modems. I read the manuals, I do everything as instructed. They still don't work. One of my IT-CS friends or family members comes over, touches it, and it starts to work. I don't understand that. 😅
I'm an industrial maintenance mechanic. Absolutely love this ❤
"Don't update if it's not breaking. Also, why aren't you running basic repairs regularly instead of only when something breaks? Also, why is your software outdated?"
A non-self-aware engineer.
Coffee is the most important item in a maintenance person's life. Then that one tool that fixes everything, usually a multi tool. And we ALL hate the paperwork, though proper documentation of repair procedures are helpful...most times.
I want a "Universe's OK-est Engineer," mug.
Never underestimate an angry engineer! 🤣🤣🤣
I rarely commented on youtube. Heck, this quality A stuff. I am laughing all the way after Dave got on the Alien ship.
and your not alone
Dont mess with the maintenance guy, retired maintenance guy
If it ain't broke, don't update it! Nobody ever reads the compatibility notes.
That depends on the industry you work in. I know people who read those as part of their work. (It's different when peoples lives actually depend on it.)
Thanks for posting this video, and thanks for the laughs! I laughed the hardest near the end when the computer said it would ake over 47 years to complete all of the updates! 😂😂😂 I do tend to go a while between updates, because it is annoying to have to wait through even one, but it's not a good idea to wait too long, or worse, to never co them at all. I have been guilty of waiting too long a few times and paid the price for it. I'm better at doing them more often now. I still wait a bit of a while, but will pick a good time to do it and find something to keep me occupied while it's going on. Anyway, it could be a lot worse. When I started using the internet, I had dial-up internet service and had to do my updates at dial-up speeds! 😂 Because of my personal update habits and dial-up memories, and the fact that this is happening to an alien invasion fleet, that part of this story cracks me up the most.😂
I have listened to a lot of these type of stories. This one was awesome.
This was very entertaining 😂
Love these stories.
This one was fabulous. loved it!!
I know you want to stop the intruder but I'd think no shooting blasters in maintenance tunnels with cables and pipes that could be readily hit
I've worked in home repair and HVAC on boilers and chillers and I can promise you yes you do learn the sounds and can hear that crap. A great in the back of your head and drives you insane so you can escape it. Big box stores are notorious for bad maintenance on their Air handlers and the belt squeaking and the bearings vibrating is horrible
47 year update time, most definitely a Windows operating program.
And likely has to restart after every update...
As a computer guy who got volunteered all the time to fix things I can commiserate.
It's been a long time since I laughed this hard... This brought back memories since i've been retired.... Even the paperwork filled out in triplicates... Simply loved this story...
Okay, but turning off and back on a computer DURING AN UPDATE is how you get one massive brick. That's why it says to not shut it down forcefully at those times
i had to admit id like this story .... got a little grit of Jett Reno , the carelessness of the 11th. Doctor and the gravity of a average screwturner...
Loved the story. It was so well put together.
DO NOT fuck with the guy who has a massive adjustable wrench labelled "THE SOLUTION"
As a maintenance person i could actually picture this happening
This needs to be made into a movie!!!
made him take a course on plasma couplings, TWICE...
I imagine a massive war machine making grinding noises and letting loose with a mighty pfft instead of a war ending boom.
i feel like they're was an episode on Star Trek where Scotty had a day like this 🤔🤭🤣👉
Love suspiciously like windows VISTA, oh lordy
its sad i can imagine exactly what that garbage disposal sounds like.
Funny! It's better than news!
I'm new to these these are fun
This was simply brilliant 😂😂😂😂
Awesome and great story. They should make it into a short story, preferably animated.
At this point I am convinced every important human person in the future is going to be a Rodriguez 😂
I love these ones 😂
Ingenious! I enjoyed this story extremely.
Aliens were obviously ex Microsoft employees. Or, maybe Adobe.
FANTASTIC ! Wonder what Cutler and Petzold would have to say about this Tale. Am sure Torvalds is laughing his head off :-)
very nice. thank you 😊
I enjoyed this one! Really!
I laughed many, many times 👍
funny.love it
Rodriguez and Chen strike again!!
As a mechanic by trade this one is hilarious in so many ways 😂
I loved it
I don't usually give feedback on syfy because most of it is questionable . I do like this one. It's possible. We haven't become a super race gust your selves.
Cool :)
very very like this one....
Okay I'm about 2/3 of the way through the story and he's fixing their ships. Did he forget he was supposed to basically rig the ships to shut down or blow at Earth's discretion?
He fixed it and then "fixed" it.
This was quite good. 😂
A moment later the alien fleet gets a call "would you like to extend the warranty on..."
That was so funny good job
Another great one like this is "The Empire Sent Their Greatest Warriors, Humans Sent One Angry Mechanic With A Wrench"
12:03 latrine duty strikes again😂
As a ship’s engineer, I can relate… lol
most American thing ever..
dont bother me till i have had my coffee.
The ememy is here
Yeah, well, they wont get far with thier systems failing.
What did he say?
I said you're in possession of breaking crap that is about to break.
Can you come look?
.... Yes? I, a representative of the enemy you intend to conquer, will come aboard and check your system.... For some stupid reason.
All can do is😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 great love it
Great story 😂
But I have not seen ONE sign, of the magic smoke
Once you see that, the things dead
Funny ! 👍🏻
One of the few AI stories Liked ...... more for the idea.
Sometimes the greatest victories are the simplest ones
Das war doch wirklich witzig. Dabei ist ein echter Schrauber😂😂
Es sind so viele gute Phrasen in dieser Geschichte 😂
Nah the second this happens im making sure all of the systems fail 12:14
The difference between a okest engineer and an professional engineer. Is the okest can get it running with garbage where thr professional needs the correct part
why is the commander bothering a maintenance worker instead of being at their post? that part confused me greatly.
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAW XD
Harheeheegigglety hee! +snicker+ love the turns of phrase! Nothing like a cranky mechanic expert who names their tools!
so basically they sent Issac Clarke?
ROFLOL!
Hi
Alot of these AI sci fi stories remind me of something akin to Terry Pratchett and i love it 😂
Not volunteer , voluntold. Lol
Windows Vista 😂😂😂
21k views,,, 777 likes... yeah im just commenting and saving to playlist dubbed legendary videos, God bless Dave! Daisies...Daisy...Day-Z...Wont you pick some Daisy for me ;) *insert hot brunette alongside 6 generations of lifetime supplies of coffee here*... 20m later upon completion of video me who refreshes the page to double check. Windows :"YOU DIDN'T UPDATE"... me: fuck i just wanted aesthetic like to view count :/
First 8-9 minutes were intriguing then some trigger a "Silly" bomb. Good start but then......ehh