This is 100% spot on. After a 30 year marriage, my husband was caught having multiple affairs via the Ashley Madison cheaters site. He did not want to get a divorce because of this, and wanted to go to marriage counselling to ‘save the marriage’. I really just wanted a divorce because the trust was destroyed, but - (regretfully) appeased his wishes, because I knew he would be a nightmare to divorce. During the counselling sessions…which went on for 10 months, and he took no accountability whatsoever for his affairs, and unbelievably blamed them on ME (because I apparently didn’t give him enough attention). The counsellor diagnosed him with sex addiction and Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and told me to run for my life, which I did. Imagine my shock. at the first mediation after I filed for divorce, when his lawyer announced to the mediator…that my husband was ‘blindsided’ by the divorce. What?!? He was out to play the victim, rather than the lying, cheating antagonist that he was. The divorce dragged on for three brutal and costly years, while he did nothing but lie, manipulate and stall…using the legal system to ‘punish’ me for divorcing him. They are a nightmare, and you will never know how vindictive and hateful they are, until you want out of the relationship. Avoid these people at all cost. Wolves in sheep’s clothing. 🐺
Listening to this, I literally heard everything about my ex. Made up problems all the time, although at first it was so amazing and it felt like I met a "completely different than others" girl. Over time, I began to be afraid that some attractive girls would pass us by and in her head an idea would appear that one day I would definitely leave her. She was a few years older than me and every time I shaved and she saw my face I already knew I was completely screwed. I was raised only by my mother and had no male role model. If you hear all your childhood that women are good and TV tells you that this should be your main goal, you can screw up your life. There were fights but there were also damn good moments. Love bombing in full power from time to time. I was half a second away from proposing. Fortunately, the remnants of my crushed dignity never allowed me to take out the ring. After five years, she found herself another guy in a dozen or so days and get pregnant even faster. Today, it no longer surprises me that the scripts for great romances and the best poems are written by men. Men love unconditionally and women love for what we can give them. Single mothers are a disease of the 21st century. I can clearly see that all the current problems are the result of raising weak, ignorant men without fathers. A strong, responsible, disciplined, emotional male model is the most important factor in raising an emotionally healthy child. Thank you for this channel. I will never marry. If my woman won't understand that, tough. I will never sign a contract that can destroy my whole life just because of the slightest female whim.
omg this happened to me, yes from a male. I have been pancaked emotionally by their false and bizarre accusations. It’s been the hardest break up ever. I’m a lawyer and you remind me e SO much of a fellow practitioner it’s uncanny. Great content and delivery. You are NOT embarrassing the profession - I read that commenter 🙄
Everything was good with my fiance until I talked about the prenup agreement.... In my country she can take 50% of your assets even those you invested in before mariage. Not only that but also the interests... That's completely suicidal. I will NEVER think about this hell called mariage...
My ex wae bordeline. Even though what you say about love bombe and favorite person. Atatchment and then suddenly being here number one "enemy". She still is one of the best person i ever met. And she was very aware of here illness. Unfortunately its a nasty ilnes wich grabs a hold of a person and wont let go easy. They really cant help themself even though they wont to. I really hope in the futre medical science does more to help borderline disorders. God bless❤
I experienced this without understanding what BPD was. I loved the good times and tolerated the bad. But that only lasts so long. Walking on the eggshells that's fun. If you are attracted to a BPD you probably have something you need help with in your own life at least that was the case with me. And yes, the allegations they put out there during the discard is are more over the top than they need to be and usually only believed by them. They will lie to themselves about something that is imagined until they truly believe it at least that's what I think they do., Eventually they will likely discard you or push you to leave. I have much compassion for people that suffer from BPD but you don't want to date them or marry them because you will become mentally unstable and unhealthy over time and the time you will waste every week dealing with them needing you to soothe them or the time they spend giving you the silent treatment or somehow passive aggressively punishing you for not being the person they imagine you to be is exhausting.
Great comment! I agree 100%. Hopefully that relationship is far back in your rear view mirror and you have moved on completely. They will suck all of your bandwidth, then discard you or force you to leave because the situation is not longer tenable.
Most people get under this infatuation spell in the first stages and end up hurting themselves financially and emotionally in the long run. It all comes down normally after the first big dispute. They might not even be borderline, but if they already depressed, unhappy, and have neurotic and unhealthy tendencies they'll end up falling in the codepedent niche. Which is in my opinion almost more than half of marriages in the world. People simply cant be alone, especially women, so they'll try every tactic in the book to coerce you into marrying. Stay cautious brothers. Watch the laws in your country. Im in France in a country where divorces even worst than America and where we have compensatory reward. Men can be so ignorant as they persuade you.
......wow. Just wow would have been nice knowing this 14 years ago before I got married to a woman with BPD. Divorced 3 years ago, haven't been happier.
Incredible really these emotionally unstable types have as much control over their emotions as a toddler. The intellect and body has developed but the emotional maturity is that of a small child due to childhood trauma or genetic predisposition. A tantrum in an adult can be highly dangerous however as their feelings to them are literally the facts without the ability for any reality testing. I recommend the TH-cam content creator “The Little Shaman” for narcissist content, she truly is enlightening.
I encourage all men to thoroughly research Cluster B personality disorders, some chicks won’t have the diagnosis but will have a lot of traits of these disorders
The advice you give is always pure, unfiltered gold. Your breakthrough on TH-cam is definitely gonna come, sir. I look forward to seeing it cause it's so deserved.
Michael - thank you for watching and commenting. My serious videos do not get much attention. When I add some levity to the topics the message seems to resonate with the people who watch. I’ll try to strike a balance between my courtroom persona and my less serious side. I appreciate your comment. Happy to have you as part of my TH-cam community!
Nothing is worse than those enacting bad laws and putting criminals back on the street/enabling them (I'm Canadian). Also these divorce laws are crippling both our countries to the point where we're not even replacing our population, requiring immigration to do it.
@@jcnlaw im sure you will save at least 1 mans life if not many men's lives...which in a way i supposed makes you a legit hero. not all heroes wear capes!
Instead of getting married I think i'll go play my guitar instead.
Word.😂
Rule #1, NEVER ignore red flags. If you are considering marriage, date for 2-3 years, live together for one more before getting married with a prenup.
This is 100% spot on. After a 30 year marriage, my husband was caught having multiple affairs via the Ashley Madison cheaters site. He did not want to get a divorce because of this, and wanted to go to marriage counselling to ‘save the marriage’. I really just wanted a divorce because the trust was destroyed, but - (regretfully) appeased his wishes, because I knew he would be a nightmare to divorce. During the counselling sessions…which went on for 10 months, and he took no accountability whatsoever for his affairs, and unbelievably blamed them on ME (because I apparently didn’t give him enough attention). The counsellor diagnosed him with sex addiction and Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and told me to run for my life, which I did. Imagine my shock. at the first mediation after I filed for divorce, when his lawyer announced to the mediator…that my husband was ‘blindsided’ by the divorce. What?!? He was out to play the victim, rather than the lying, cheating antagonist that he was. The divorce dragged on for three brutal and costly years, while he did nothing but lie, manipulate and stall…using the legal system to ‘punish’ me for divorcing him. They are a nightmare, and you will never know how vindictive and hateful they are, until you want out of the relationship. Avoid these people at all cost. Wolves in sheep’s clothing. 🐺
Listening to this, I literally heard everything about my ex. Made up problems all the time, although at first it was so amazing and it felt like I met a "completely different than others" girl. Over time, I began to be afraid that some attractive girls would pass us by and in her head an idea would appear that one day I would definitely leave her. She was a few years older than me and every time I shaved and she saw my face I already knew I was completely screwed. I was raised only by my mother and had no male role model. If you hear all your childhood that women are good and TV tells you that this should be your main goal, you can screw up your life. There were fights but there were also damn good moments. Love bombing in full power from time to time. I was half a second away from proposing. Fortunately, the remnants of my crushed dignity never allowed me to take out the ring. After five years, she found herself another guy in a dozen or so days and get pregnant even faster. Today, it no longer surprises me that the scripts for great romances and the best poems are written by men. Men love unconditionally and women love for what we can give them. Single mothers are a disease of the 21st century. I can clearly see that all the current problems are the result of raising weak, ignorant men without fathers. A strong, responsible, disciplined, emotional male model is the most important factor in raising an emotionally healthy child. Thank you for this channel. I will never marry. If my woman won't understand that, tough. I will never sign a contract that can destroy my whole life just because of the slightest female whim.
omg this happened to me, yes from a male. I have been pancaked emotionally by their false and bizarre accusations. It’s been the hardest break up ever.
I’m a lawyer and you remind me e SO much of a fellow practitioner it’s uncanny. Great content and delivery. You are NOT embarrassing the profession - I read that commenter 🙄
Everything was good with my fiance until I talked about the prenup agreement.... In my country she can take 50% of your assets even those you invested in before mariage. Not only that but also the interests... That's completely suicidal.
I will NEVER think about this hell called mariage...
My ex wae bordeline. Even though what you say about love bombe and favorite person. Atatchment and then suddenly being here number one "enemy". She still is one of the best person i ever met. And she was very aware of here illness. Unfortunately its a nasty ilnes wich grabs a hold of a person and wont let go easy. They really cant help themself even though they wont to. I really hope in the futre medical science does more to help borderline disorders. God bless❤
I experienced this without understanding what BPD was. I loved the good times and tolerated the bad. But that only lasts so long. Walking on the eggshells that's fun. If you are attracted to a BPD you probably have something you need help with in your own life at least that was the case with me. And yes, the allegations they put out there during the discard is are more over the top than they need to be and usually only believed by them. They will lie to themselves about something that is imagined until they truly believe it at least that's what I think they do., Eventually they will likely discard you or push you to leave. I have much compassion for people that suffer from BPD but you don't want to date them or marry them because you will become mentally unstable and unhealthy over time and the time you will waste every week dealing with them needing you to soothe them or the time they spend giving you the silent treatment or somehow passive aggressively punishing you for not being the person they imagine you to be is exhausting.
Great comment! I agree 100%. Hopefully that relationship is far back in your rear view mirror and you have moved on completely. They will suck all of your bandwidth, then discard you or force you to leave because the situation is not longer tenable.
@@jcnlaw exactly!
Most people get under this infatuation spell in the first stages and end up hurting themselves financially and emotionally in the long run. It all comes down normally after the first big dispute. They might not even be borderline, but if they already depressed, unhappy, and have neurotic and unhealthy tendencies they'll end up falling in the codepedent niche. Which is in my opinion almost more than half of marriages in the world. People simply cant be alone, especially women, so they'll try every tactic in the book to coerce you into marrying. Stay cautious brothers. Watch the laws in your country. Im in France in a country where divorces even worst than America and where we have compensatory reward. Men can be so ignorant as they persuade you.
......wow. Just wow
would have been nice knowing this 14 years ago before I got married to a woman with BPD. Divorced 3 years ago, haven't been happier.
It’s like the person doesn’t love you, they love the person they want you to be, I dated someone like this, exhausting!
Incredible really these emotionally unstable types have as much control over their emotions as a toddler. The intellect and body has developed but the emotional maturity is that of a small child due to childhood trauma or genetic predisposition. A tantrum in an adult can be highly dangerous however as their feelings to them are literally the facts without the ability for any reality testing.
I recommend the TH-cam content creator “The Little Shaman” for narcissist content, she truly is enlightening.
It makes more sense to help a beached whale make it to shore than it would to get married.
Lots of land whales around!
Nonsense, you just have to pick the right life partner and John here tells you exactly who to avoid. Plenty of happy marries around ( including me)
If I ever go into your office, it will be only to jam on guitar or school you in hockey.
Tell em uncle Jon!
I encourage all men to thoroughly research Cluster B personality disorders, some chicks won’t have the diagnosis but will have a lot of traits of these disorders
The advice you give is always pure, unfiltered gold. Your breakthrough on TH-cam is definitely gonna come, sir. I look forward to seeing it cause it's so deserved.
Thank you!
There's definitely demand for this material. But I'm sure TH-cam is shadow-banning this material.
Excellent video! Should be required viewing in High School. Ignore at your own risk.
This guy is doing you a huge favor here.
Thankfully I dumped her for good and never married her.
I like your new intro!
You’re a funny guy, like to watch you, but you’re embarrassing the legal profession can you turn it down a little bit more be more serious?
Michael - thank you for watching and commenting. My serious videos do not get much attention. When I add some levity to the topics the message seems to resonate with the people who watch. I’ll try to strike a balance between my courtroom persona and my less serious side. I appreciate your comment. Happy to have you as part of my TH-cam community!
don't listen to the haters Jonathan you are doing amazing.
@@jessbell4265 Thank you Jess.
Nothing is worse than those enacting bad laws and putting criminals back on the street/enabling them (I'm Canadian). Also these divorce laws are crippling both our countries to the point where we're not even replacing our population, requiring immigration to do it.
@@jcnlaw im sure you will save at least 1 mans life if not many men's lives...which in a way i supposed makes you a legit hero. not all heroes wear capes!