The only way I found to solve the issue you have is 1. Write about the fear I have of what would happen if I did tell someone I do not like their behavior. 2. Improve my self esteem and self care. So I know I deserve better and I will handle just fine then consequences of upsetting someone.
😅 I'm pretty much in the same boat, wish I had some advice to offer. Personally, I think it's so hard for me be assertive because of my low self esteem. Like, if I had more confidence I think it would be easier to be more of advocate for myself.
Yes. Does it feel like you would be doing something awful if you do or would? That's how I always feel or think. "No, I cant do that. What would people think of me"
@@superanxietychick7035 Yeah I know that feeling well. I also think to myself, well people (for example my coworkers) already expect me to behave a certain way (like reserved/subdued), so if I try to break the status quo now it could backfire on me.
I'm not sure I agree it's important to be exactly "assertive.'" Sometimes a little shyness is good, because we don't want to clash too much. Also, maybe your instinct is more in line with being "diplomatic," as opposed to clashing and confrontational. I think "assertiveness" is one of the problem areas in mainstream psychology. Obviously, sarcasm is too indirect and passive, but maybe you already have a healthy instinct to avoid clashing. So, yes, you may want to overcome the sarcasm and passive aggressiveness. But that doesn't mean you want to flip it all the way and just be clashing. Maybe, it's ok to stay indirect, but just learn to be more effective in terms of getting your message across, but in a diplomatic way. Often, to avoid a real clash, we have to be a little indirect... just to avoid coming across as too rash and clashy. Maybe very very close to sarcasm is just healthy humor,, and sometimes humor is very effective at getting an important message across, and then people don't think we're brittle or rash... and they'll respect us more for that. In the end, it's important to be cool and show people we're not over-reacting.
The only way I found to solve the issue you have is
1. Write about the fear I have of what would happen if I did tell someone I do not like their behavior.
2. Improve my self esteem and self care. So I know I deserve better and I will handle just fine then consequences of upsetting someone.
I have been trying to give up sarcasm for years.
😅 I'm pretty much in the same boat, wish I had some advice to offer. Personally, I think it's so hard for me be assertive because of my low self esteem. Like, if I had more confidence I think it would be easier to be more of advocate for myself.
Yes. Does it feel like you would be doing something awful if you do or would? That's how I always feel or think. "No, I cant do that. What would people think of me"
@@superanxietychick7035 Yeah I know that feeling well. I also think to myself, well people (for example my coworkers) already expect me to behave a certain way (like reserved/subdued), so if I try to break the status quo now it could backfire on me.
I'm not sure I agree it's important to be exactly "assertive.'" Sometimes a little shyness is good, because we don't want to clash too much. Also, maybe your instinct is more in line with being "diplomatic," as opposed to clashing and confrontational. I think "assertiveness" is one of the problem areas in mainstream psychology. Obviously, sarcasm is too indirect and passive, but maybe you already have a healthy instinct to avoid clashing. So, yes, you may want to overcome the sarcasm and passive aggressiveness. But that doesn't mean you want to flip it all the way and just be clashing. Maybe, it's ok to stay indirect, but just learn to be more effective in terms of getting your message across, but in a diplomatic way. Often, to avoid a real clash, we have to be a little indirect... just to avoid coming across as too rash and clashy. Maybe very very close to sarcasm is just healthy humor,, and sometimes humor is very effective at getting an important message across, and then people don't think we're brittle or rash... and they'll respect us more for that. In the end, it's important to be cool and show people we're not over-reacting.