How much you want to bet the "adoption" was being arranged through the mother's friend group for one of their childless children? That was just so suspicious.
Let's hope OP stays NC with them It would not surprise me if 'mother dearest' comes to Reddit in the future, coplaining that her kids went NC on her and she was always so good to them!
YES, and did not even let OP reimburse her for her help. She helped lovingly without "keeping score" and taking advantage of her sister's need to assert control like the parents did. I posted above how much I hate asking others for help in my own life because it makes me vulnerable to their control and manipulations. However, deep down she now knows that she cannot fully trust the OP with a secret and there is a chance that she will always be on her guard in the future with very private information with her sister in such a way that she would not have otherwise. The OP probably could have gotten her help just as well WITHOUT doing that.
@@Zurround You make it sound like OP did it on purpose when she clearly didn't. We all blurt out stuff we didn't mean to at times when we're upset. It happens. OP is lucky to have a sister that didn't get stuck on that anger.
@@maltemejlstrup4746 I KNOW and I majorly regret that I have done that myself in my past and I am sure that her sister KNEW basically everything you just said which is why she forgave her and helped her BUT that does NOT mean that there will not be a lingering seed of doubt in the back of her mind for the rest of their lives where she won't be quite as willing to trust her sister with a sensitive secret as she was before. Even if its only a tiny "tweak" in that direction.
I would suggest both Op & her sister retain attorneys to establish wills & to make sure their parents never will be able to see any children they have.
Read up on narcissistic personality disorder. These “grandparents”are not normal. You need to know what you’re dealing with. They may not be actual narcissists but very narcissistic, but YOU need to evaluate it so you know & if they are you can anticipate what they are going to do next. Knowing what to expect will help you plan ahead. Since I’ve been in a seemingly very similar situation, I would actually say don’t leave them alone with your child anymore, at the very least.
You are a mentally healthy young woman. Had you stayed with your abusive parents, you would’ve been unhappy. Your sister and brother in law are awesome. I’m so happy you and your daughter are making a new life for yourself. Wish you the best.
The punishment of getting everyone to ignore whoever had upset the mother really got to me, thats ao cruel and toxic, i cant imagine ever ever treating your child like that 😢
As someone who is finally getting away from my incredibly toxic mother, this gave me actual tears of joy. I am so incredibly happy for this person. I have nobody at all so I'm so, so happy for her that her sister cares so much and is helping her ♡
You rock girl. I’m so proud of you and your sister and your BIL. have had family problems a lot in my younger years, and it was different family members who helped me and my Princess out. We’re standing tall and our youngest sons will be 33 this year. You got this. Much love ❤️
So proud of you and happy you’re wonderful sister and bil were willing to help you out. You will be a wonderful mom and aunt just as your sister will. I wish the best of luck to you all.
1. The parents are abusive and cruel. OP should have taken the parents to small claims court. She also needs to see a lawyer about the potentiality of parents claiming grandparents' rights.
It always surprises me at some of the mental gymnastics these people go through, we want to give away our granddaughter but we have rights as grandparents to be part of their lives? Can anyone else see the flaw in that logic? I supposes if they were normal sensible thinking people then they wouldn't be entitled and narcissists and we wouldn't get this video and others like it but as I said these sorts of people have no sense of logic in them.
Firstly, that was a play for control, but if she didn’t get in line… they meant THEMSELVES. They wanted to take away her baby, because they wanted CONTROL of the baby. They are insane control freaks, and probably VERY narcissistic if not narcissists. Mom sounds like a serious narc.
They said they'd give the child away but with the implied promise that you can keep her if you allow us to take over both your lives. A standard control tactic.
@@rhondasisco-cleveland2665 All of the FAT SHAMING comments about the OP's weight and what she was snacking on. Something similar done to children could contribute to eating disorders like BULLEMIA or ANOREXIA. That alone is reason enough to not let them be a part of the lives of their grand children.
When I turned 18 and moved out my parents kept all my stuff too. I had to start over with nothing but the clothes on my back though I'd worked for three years. It's more common then you'd think because the 8 passengers dad did it too. 💖 Im glad we all understand now.....
your parents are horrible, vicious people--but whatever possessed you to get pregnant before you could support a child--you need to get child support from your ex
The parents may be horrible, but OP's bringing a lot of this onto herself! Being a single, baby momma was her 1st mistake, then became a disgusting, overweight pig didn't help! Being a blabbermouth showed her lack of control! She's doomed herself getting on everyone's nerves! "The heat of the moment?" You're such an a-#ole OP! ;-(
Yeah, because as we all know, condoms prevent all pregnancies all the time 100% of the time and accidents never, ever happen. “Ugh, then she should have ABORTED!!” Cute, so you think only wealthy, well-off people should have kids? How 1940s of you. Maybe she had a partner she thought she could rely on who bailed on her and the kid. Maybe she lives in a state where abortions are heavily restricted and she missed the cutoff date. Maybe there’s no clinic near her and she couldn’t AFFORD an abortion. Maybe she was assaulted. Maybe an accident just happened and she chose to raise a child because she wanted to love and be loved. Coincidentally, regardless of her reasoning, incredibly it’s NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.
So OP already knew that her parents were horrible people and chose to bring a child into this situation? She sounds just as selfish as her self absorbed mother. She better be grateful for her older sister and pull her own weight from now on. Change your phone number and go no contact with these poor excuse for parents. Where’s baby daddy? Child support?
Wait till the parents find out that the sister have a daughter and can't see her either the best way to live life is to your best life without those negative people in your life and I don't care who they are If they bring you down you don't want them around 💪
One thing I HATE in life is that whenever I go to someone else for HELP of almost any kind I am left feeling VULNERABLE. When you go to someone else for help you are AT THEIR MERCY and you leave yourself in a position where you can be controlled or abused or taken advantage of. Basically you "lose face". So many times in life I have gotten hurt trying to get help from others. Even if I do get the help it comes at a price to my own mental health and self esteem. I hated the old @$$H0L3 parents in this story and I like to imagine that the loneliness will hit them like a ton of bricks when over the years they never get to see or hear from their adult children and miss out on getting to be a part of the childhoods of their grand children.
Don't let such people in your lives, doesn't matter it they are your family, friends or relatives. They are contagious and will destroy everything you have. In my family, they don't even have the respect of a shoe rack, and will never be entertained.
While I support the op, but 230pounds is really heavy, I’m 6”3 220pounds a really fit military guy and I’m considered as over weight during the yearly medical checkups
Where is the child's father? 'Not in the picture' means nothing. Why is he avoiding his responsibilities or perhaps he doesn't even know he's a father?
The attack on weight and looks shows how jealous she is of her daughters. The silent treatment is horrible abuse. I went through it. Mom probably cheated on dad and slept around as the real tramp
Naw op shouldn't forgive them nor let them back, yes people change however they didn't stop one moment when they started to do the same thing they did to op, and op's sister to their 1yo granddaughter, seriously she was 1years old and, they started to do the same emotional scarring they did to both of their now adult children, to their grandchild while still doing it to op too, and then wanted to put op's daughter up for adoption, and then stole and sold all of op's and her daughter's things when they didn't, get their way because op finally started refuse to let them scar her child, so no these people should stay far away and forgotten, both for op's and especially her daughter sake.
This woman decided unilaterally to get, and stay, pregnant - against the wishes of everyone who she thought should pay for this baby. Yes, she had terrible parents, but she knew that before she did this. How is not breeding until you are in a financial position to do so considered such an AH thing to suggest people do. If you decide to replicate, it's up to you to find someone who CONSENTS to having a child with you, and to ensure YOU can pay for this without scrounging off anyone else.
When parents were vaccinated, there were 8 shots. Now, there are over 82. I'm not anti vaxx but there are far too many and tons of evidence of vaxx injuries.
Oof, I had to restart the story because when she blamed gaining 70 pounds on her pregnancy I about lost it and couldn’t hear the video over my ranting. Who the fuck gains 70 pounds during a pregnancy? That is more than twice what most women gain during their pregnancy. I would expect their doctor to be alarmed by that. When was she 160? In freshman year? Just admit you gained weight as an adult, don’t blame jumping from 160lbs 5 years ago to 230lbs now on baby fat.
Couldn’t afford to take care of a baby, but chose to be a single mother and live with her abusive parents who had to financially support her . Look the parents are horrible, but op put herself in that position.
You are kinda AH because you decided to hv a child but cannot afford it on your own and had to go back to parents for support. And why drag your sister into this.
I didbt heat anything about the baby dad. She chose that single mother life and now everybody has to help out. Her sister is an angel i wouldnt have help out.
We don't know why she is a single mother. But, from the sounds of it, she is doing a good job. There are many reasons as to why someone is a single parent. Just because she is living at her parents house, does not mean they have the right to make damnds of how she cares for her child. OP is working, and caring for her child, a parent helping doesn't mean they control all. I am happily married for 30 years and have 3 children. My inlaws helped us out for 2 months right after I gave birth, and they never tried to force their ways onto me. Why didn't my parents help? Because they are just like OPs parents so I have nothing to do with them. Millions of parenst help their children, but a good majority do not demand their child raise their grandchild the way THEY want or demand they give their child up for adoption if they are not obeyed. Her parenst did not try to shared their experiences and wisdom on parenting, they demanded OP get in line, or else. As for her sister, OP is blessed to have such a loving sister.
@christineb629 I love your response. I had the same type of relationship with my mother. My father went along with her dictatorship because she was his caretaker (he was a quadriplegic). We don't know why OP is a single mom. People get divorced (that's why I was a single mom) or have other situations that happen it doesn't mean they don't deserve help or compassion. My daughter made a choice to have a child on her own with a sperm donor. I was so happy for her. I bought as much as I could and still do. My granddaughter just started talking. There's nothing like her running towards me smiling saying "Gigi".
Well OP has shown poor decision making. Parents are picking up her slack. They're probably hoping that OP can pass for human and get a real life on her own.
So..being raised in this type of abuse op should know how to make better choices? Living day to day, trying to learn and deal with all that, plus the whole "must find a husband and reproduce " crap pushed at young people, being tricked in love, then raising one child by herself and you want to stay crap like that? Grandparents are not good people in any way and only wanted to control and abuse her and her child. They and people who say crap like you did get a fail as humans.
How much you want to bet the "adoption" was being arranged through the mother's friend group for one of their childless children? That was just so suspicious.
As a survivor of a narcissistic mother, I can tell you without doubt that that mother is a MAJOR narcissist. 👋🇨🇦
Let's hope OP stays NC with them
It would not surprise me if 'mother dearest' comes to Reddit in the future, coplaining that her kids went NC on her and she was always so good to them!
Love that while Rachel was mad at OP, she still stepped up to help!
YES, and did not even let OP reimburse her for her help. She helped lovingly without "keeping score" and taking advantage of her sister's need to assert control like the parents did. I posted above how much I hate asking others for help in my own life because it makes me vulnerable to their control and manipulations.
However, deep down she now knows that she cannot fully trust the OP with a secret and there is a chance that she will always be on her guard in the future with very private information with her sister in such a way that she would not have otherwise. The OP probably could have gotten her help just as well WITHOUT doing that.
@@Zurround You make it sound like OP did it on purpose when she clearly didn't. We all blurt out stuff we didn't mean to at times when we're upset. It happens. OP is lucky to have a sister that didn't get stuck on that anger.
@@maltemejlstrup4746 I KNOW and I majorly regret that I have done that myself in my past and I am sure that her sister KNEW basically everything you just said which is why she forgave her and helped her BUT that does NOT mean that there will not be a lingering seed of doubt in the back of her mind for the rest of their lives where she won't be quite as willing to trust her sister with a sensitive secret as she was before. Even if its only a tiny "tweak" in that direction.
I would suggest both Op & her sister retain attorneys to establish wills & to make sure their parents never will be able to see any children they have.
Read up on narcissistic personality disorder. These “grandparents”are not normal. You need to know what you’re dealing with. They may not be actual narcissists but very narcissistic, but YOU need to evaluate it so you know & if they are you can anticipate what they are going to do next. Knowing what to expect will help you plan ahead. Since I’ve been in a seemingly very similar situation, I would actually say don’t leave them alone with your child anymore, at the very least.
You are a mentally healthy young woman. Had you stayed with your abusive parents, you would’ve been unhappy. Your sister and brother in law are awesome. I’m so happy you and your daughter are making a new life for yourself. Wish you the best.
The punishment of getting everyone to ignore whoever had upset the mother really got to me, thats ao cruel and toxic, i cant imagine ever ever treating your child like that 😢
As someone who is finally getting away from my incredibly toxic mother, this gave me actual tears of joy. I am so incredibly happy for this person. I have nobody at all so I'm so, so happy for her that her sister cares so much and is helping her ♡
Missed opportunity when you were calling the friends to ask about the stolen stuff
You rock girl. I’m so proud of you and your sister and your BIL. have had family problems a lot in my younger years, and it was different family members who helped me and my Princess out. We’re standing tall and our youngest sons will be 33 this year. You got this. Much love ❤️
"I couldnt believe what they had said and I exploded" AWESOME!
So proud of you and happy you’re wonderful sister and bil were willing to help you out. You will be a wonderful mom and aunt just as your sister will. I wish the best of luck to you all.
1. The parents are abusive and cruel. OP should have taken the parents to small claims court. She also needs to see a lawyer about the potentiality of parents claiming grandparents' rights.
It always surprises me at some of the mental gymnastics these people go through, we want to give away our granddaughter but we have rights as grandparents to be part of their lives? Can anyone else see the flaw in that logic? I supposes if they were normal sensible thinking people then they wouldn't be entitled and narcissists and we wouldn't get this video and others like it but as I said these sorts of people have no sense of logic in them.
Firstly, that was a play for control, but if she didn’t get in line… they meant THEMSELVES. They wanted to take away her baby, because they wanted CONTROL of the baby. They are insane control freaks, and probably VERY narcissistic if not narcissists. Mom sounds like a serious narc.
They said they'd give the child away but with the implied promise that you can keep her if you allow us to take over both your lives. A standard control tactic.
@@rhondasisco-cleveland2665 All of the FAT SHAMING comments about the OP's weight and what she was snacking on. Something similar done to children could contribute to eating disorders like BULLEMIA or ANOREXIA. That alone is reason enough to not let them be a part of the lives of their grand children.
Huzzah for the sister!
When I turned 18 and moved out my parents kept all my stuff too. I had to start over with nothing but the clothes on my back though I'd worked for three years. It's more common then you'd think because the 8 passengers dad did it too. 💖 Im glad we all understand now.....
"this is gonna be the final update from me *until* something wild happens"
I would burn down the house 🏡 and say “What House!!!???”
your parents are horrible, vicious people--but whatever possessed you to get pregnant before you could support a child--you need to get child support from your ex
The parents may be horrible, but OP's bringing a lot of this onto herself! Being a single, baby momma was her 1st mistake, then became a disgusting, overweight pig didn't help! Being a blabbermouth showed her lack of control! She's doomed herself getting on everyone's nerves! "The heat of the moment?" You're such an a-#ole OP! ;-(
Yeah, because as we all know, condoms prevent all pregnancies all the time 100% of the time and accidents never, ever happen.
“Ugh, then she should have ABORTED!!” Cute, so you think only wealthy, well-off people should have kids? How 1940s of you.
Maybe she had a partner she thought she could rely on who bailed on her and the kid. Maybe she lives in a state where abortions are heavily restricted and she missed the cutoff date. Maybe there’s no clinic near her and she couldn’t AFFORD an abortion. Maybe she was assaulted. Maybe an accident just happened and she chose to raise a child because she wanted to love and be loved.
Coincidentally, regardless of her reasoning, incredibly it’s NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.
So OP already knew that her parents were horrible people and chose to bring a child into this situation? She sounds just as selfish as her self absorbed mother. She better be grateful for her older sister and pull her own weight from now on. Change your phone number and go no contact with these poor excuse for parents. Where’s baby daddy? Child support?
Looking for love in all the wrong places; whether from an irresponsible young man or an infant. Or both.
She “refused to let me go” I would have called the police and demanded ur keys back
RACHEL IS MOST VALUABLE PLAYER IN THIS.
Awesome
Woooow...monster parens for her and monster grandparends for the little girl
Story one: OP. Take the hint. Your sister ran to the other side of the country to escape from your parents. Go call her, see about moving therem
Telling your sisters business is the least of your problems, you’ve got to run before your parents steal your child.
Watch out they are trying to keep the child
Good morning and have a beautiful day from California. ❤🙂
Howdy from Texas
Wait till the parents find out that the sister have a daughter and can't see her either the best way to live life is to your best life without those negative people in your life and I don't care who they are If they bring you down you don't want them around 💪
The parents are monsters! Its always about them and not their kids/grandkids.
One thing I HATE in life is that whenever I go to someone else for HELP of almost any kind I am left feeling VULNERABLE. When you go to someone else for help you are AT THEIR MERCY and you leave yourself in a position where you can be controlled or abused or taken advantage of. Basically you "lose face". So many times in life I have gotten hurt trying to get help from others. Even if I do get the help it comes at a price to my own mental health and self esteem.
I hated the old @$$H0L3 parents in this story and I like to imagine that the loneliness will hit them like a ton of bricks when over the years they never get to see or hear from their adult children and miss out on getting to be a part of the childhoods of their grand children.
How do you give away a child that you are not the legal guardian of? Also I agree with everyone else that OP needs to get child support from the dad.
U never warn a narc that ur leaving. Jesus Christ Op aren’t u used to the narc behavior? Should have called the police
More lessons in "keep your pants on' until you are in a position in life to take care of a baby.
Sounds somewhat like the FLDS movement.
op should have just spread the story among their community, people like her parents hate to have their true personalities known by their peers...
Don't let such people in your lives, doesn't matter it they are your family, friends or relatives. They are contagious and will destroy everything you have. In my family, they don't even have the respect of a shoe rack, and will never be entertained.
If my parents wanted me to give my kid up for adoption. I'd tell them why don't I give you up for adoption. I would stay no contact.
While I support the op, but 230pounds is really heavy, I’m 6”3 220pounds a really fit military guy and I’m considered as over weight during the yearly medical checkups
Put Olivia in her stroller, walk, walk, walk. Eat well, and the weight will come off.
Where is the child's father? 'Not in the picture' means nothing. Why is he avoiding his responsibilities or perhaps he doesn't even know he's a father?
Think Jim Jones
The attack on weight and looks shows how jealous she is of her daughters. The silent treatment is horrible abuse. I went through it. Mom probably cheated on dad and slept around as the real tramp
When the parents are so bad that the fact that they're anti-vaxxers is just a foot note with all the other terrible stuff they're done.
Self-proclaimed wolf shitting on anti-vaxxers, oh, the irony!
🐑
What tje parents did was considered tjeft and I'd have threatened to call the cops on them if they didnt get it back.
Girl. Stop answering unknown numbers
Naw op shouldn't forgive them nor let them back, yes people change however they didn't stop one moment when they started to do the same thing they did to op, and op's sister to their 1yo granddaughter, seriously she was 1years old and, they started to do the same emotional scarring they did to both of their now adult children, to their grandchild while still doing it to op too, and then wanted to put op's daughter up for adoption, and then stole and sold all of op's and her daughter's things when they didn't, get their way because op finally started refuse to let them scar her child, so no these people should stay far away and forgotten, both for op's and especially her daughter sake.
Change your phone number and don't share it with anyone who knows them
This woman decided unilaterally to get, and stay, pregnant - against the wishes of everyone who she thought should pay for this baby. Yes, she had terrible parents, but she knew that before she did this. How is not breeding until you are in a financial position to do so considered such an AH thing to suggest people do. If you decide to replicate, it's up to you to find someone who CONSENTS to having a child with you, and to ensure YOU can pay for this without scrounging off anyone else.
Its more how its said than actually saying it. I do agree, no babies until finances allow. But a touch of tact goes a long way
I love how parents, who are vaccinated, refuse to vaccinate their children.
When parents were vaccinated, there were 8 shots. Now, there are over 82. I'm not anti vaxx but there are far too many and tons of evidence of vaxx injuries.
How would you see her if she was put up for adoption, old man?
You were conding you
Exercise makes muscle. If you want to lose weight you have to change what goes in your mouth.
Op needs to get into contact with her sister and have come get her and go no contact story1
Oof, I had to restart the story because when she blamed gaining 70 pounds on her pregnancy I about lost it and couldn’t hear the video over my ranting. Who the fuck gains 70 pounds during a pregnancy? That is more than twice what most women gain during their pregnancy. I would expect their doctor to be alarmed by that. When was she 160? In freshman year? Just admit you gained weight as an adult, don’t blame jumping from 160lbs 5 years ago to 230lbs now on baby fat.
Couldn’t afford to take care of a baby, but chose to be a single mother and live with her abusive parents who had to financially support her . Look the parents are horrible, but op put herself in that position.
Shut up.
Where do you think she learned this lifestyle from? Jesus h
@@amberleeannalee1999 that’s not an excuse .
Don't live with your parents solved
Not to be mean but over 200 pounds is a lot.. I know we should be body positive but being obese is not healthy.
You are kinda AH because you decided to hv a child but cannot afford it on your own and had to go back to parents for support. And why drag your sister into this.
I didbt heat anything about the baby dad. She chose that single mother life and now everybody has to help out. Her sister is an angel i wouldnt have help out.
We don't know why she is a single mother. But, from the sounds of it, she is doing a good job. There are many reasons as to why someone is a single parent. Just because she is living at her parents house, does not mean they have the right to make damnds of how she cares for her child. OP is working, and caring for her child, a parent helping doesn't mean they control all. I am happily married for 30 years and have 3 children. My inlaws helped us out for 2 months right after I gave birth, and they never tried to force their ways onto me. Why didn't my parents help? Because they are just like OPs parents so I have nothing to do with them. Millions of parenst help their children, but a good majority do not demand their child raise their grandchild the way THEY want or demand they give their child up for adoption if they are not obeyed. Her parenst did not try to shared their experiences and wisdom on parenting, they demanded OP get in line, or else. As for her sister, OP is blessed to have such a loving sister.
@christineb629 I love your response. I had the same type of relationship with my mother. My father went along with her dictatorship because she was his caretaker (he was a quadriplegic). We don't know why OP is a single mom. People get divorced (that's why I was a single mom) or have other situations that happen it doesn't mean they don't deserve help or compassion. My daughter made a choice to have a child on her own with a sperm donor. I was so happy for her. I bought as much as I could and still do. My granddaughter just started talking. There's nothing like her running towards me smiling saying "Gigi".
You sound like her parents.
Well OP has shown poor decision making. Parents are picking up her slack. They're probably hoping that OP can pass for human and get a real life on her own.
Bs
🙄
Tell me you haven't heard the story without telling me you heard the story.
They are abusive. Did you not listen?
So..being raised in this type of abuse op should know how to make better choices? Living day to day, trying to learn and deal with all that, plus the whole "must find a husband and reproduce " crap pushed at young people, being tricked in love, then raising one child by herself and you want to stay crap like that? Grandparents are not good people in any way and only wanted to control and abuse her and her child. They and people who say crap like you did get a fail as humans.
The parents are abusers. Period. Glad that OP got away from those monsters.