What a Wedding Is Really About II STEVE HARVEY
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ต.ค. 2018
- A couple disagrees on how big to make their wedding, so James Sexton laid out what a wedding really means and changed some minds.
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Wow! I never saw it like that before...that was amazing.
'Don't let the first time everyone you love in a room be at your funeral'
Right? Damn he made me cry. That was such great advice
L Van Etten -What he said brought tears to my eyes.
English is not my first language, can anyone explain what that meant?
Andy Ng -he meant that it’s better for everyone you love to gather together to celebrate a wedding where everyone is happy than to gather at a funeral where everyone is sad.
I have been to dozens of weddings....probably over a hundred but I NEVER thought about it in that way. Wow!!
I agree with you girl. Most people often prepare for the wedding and forget about the marriage.
You can do b9t(
Same here
Steve never disappoints. He’s humble enough to admit when he’s wrong when he realized that the wedding isn’t only about the bride.
To all those reading comments enjoy your day😁
Well, thank you, have a good day 2
You do the same.😊
You too x
Enjoy ur day too. God bless u
Thank you. You too
I got married by the Justice of The Peace in the court house in Memphis Tennessee. It lasted against all odds, 33 years. It takes commitment for a marriage to work not a wedding ceremony.
As the girl in the relationship who didn't want a wedding, I also refused to limit the life experience of my husband to be. That's not a great way to start a marriage. He wanted a fairly traditional wedding with less than 100 people, we didn't go into any debt, and just seeing how excited he is for it is enough for me to feel it is worth it.
the problem is that most of the people at your wedding dont love you
I found this out 7 years late..
MSG515 DAYUM!
Exactly
You touched a very sore spot for many people. It's sad people can't be happy for others, but you can't live in isolation so you have to put up with them, just don't give them the importance they don't deserve.
There can be a middle ground to all of that. Compromise people, compromise... Get married at the courthouse and do a potluck party for the whole family
Yeah. no ceremony, but have a reception for the family
That's what I want to do.
That's a fantastic idea.
I thought the same thing. Call it a Wedding Celebration and spend a few thousand dollars and call it a day
No. That is stupid. Get married in church and have an appetizer reception in the fellowship hall. But make your wedding beautiful!
I do agree with the fiancé, but I also think they should realistically curtail the list, as Steve said. Invite as many special ppl as is reasonable. No point in being in debt or struggling for years after because your wedding budget was bigger than your life budget.
Bye, have a wedding you can afford. Have a medium wedding 50 to 100 people max.
Wait. 50-100 is medium? Well dang.
Yesssssss
@@hyacinthdibley2420 that's nothing!!
This therapist is great
😱
My friend got married in her parents house I was the DJ just jazz music 🎶
About 20 ppl and it was the most beautiful amazing wedding ever everyone loved it and enjoyed themselves it was very intimate and relaxed but so enjoyable 22yrs later we still talk about it from time to time they said their are never gonna forget that day 😍💜
AL Clarke That’s just amazing
Ima take this idea
In my mind if you go into debt because of a wedding you’re a fool. Happy marriage happy life. Not happy wedding happy life. Most married people get divorces because of financial problems.
👏👏👏
Are the family and friends there when you are buried in debt?! I don’t think so.
Exactly!!!!
if you don't have a good relationship with your family that's another thing :/
jigsaw master it’s not about having a good relationship with the family. Actually I have one the best relationship with my parents. It’s about being independent as an adult. Family is not supposed to cover my expenses just because I have emotional and impulsive decisions.
Yes...The one's who truly care and are in the position to assist are.
throw a big party, go in debt and everyone goes missing... steve gave a better advice than that old dude in suit
I just admire how Steve is opened to new ideas.
I love Steve’s willingness to learn... and all his cute note taking 😂💙
Yes Steve!!!! Only people who truly love you should surround you on that day! It will not be 250 ppl!
It's hard to say who are the people who truly love you, because there are so many fake people, fake kindness, fake everything...
Uhhhh is the family gonna help them celebrate by writing a CHECK???? Because a wedding isn't worth the debt if that's what it's gonna cause. They could have like a celebration dinner or something I agree with her, the marriage is what is important
I was with you until I heard what James say "Don't let the first time everyone you love in a room be at your funeral' You see, I also have families who were forced to get into debt after a loved one died also. When someone dies in Canada, the plot alone is over $10,000, so an abrupt and unplanned death can be quite costly. So many of us spend more money on loved ones when they die instead during their lifetime when they could actually enjoy it. I also believe that you can have a nice big wedding without robbing the bank.
@@SammySam316 I agree that was a good point, but that's why I said they could have like a big dinner or something to have all of the family together to celebrate that way it could be nice and much less expensive than a wedding, like a nice dinner at one of their homes and still have music so they could dance and celebrate spending half of what they'd spend on a whole wedding
Carley Gomez... You're right We truly do not have to rob the bank to have fun. Society has made many feel that they need to spend so much and this is not the case.
Carley Gomez I
McDonalds reception!!! I know there are going to be people who’ll act appalled by it. Ok. I’ll be over here smashing these large fries.
I was just like this girl and my husband wanted a big wedding .. I agreed to him and now after 5 years I have no regret and I’m very satisfied that we had great wedding because it only happen once .. congratulations to the couple
I got married in my parents home and invited my closest friends and family. Serious best day I was super relaxed had fun. I had the most important people around. Everyone was fed well and blessed us with their kind words and thoughts. Keep it small and happy
Plenty of people have fabulous weddings and piss poor marriages.
Facts
Glad someone’s finally seeing it’s about the guy and the families instead of just the bride.
Girl with dollar tree and a glue gun you can have a nice wedding
I was on the girl side too right up until "don't let the first time all the people you love be in one room be at your funeral". I dreaded a wedding because my Mom won't be there anymore. But in this moment I also realized my Mom wanted a big party for her 50th birthday we were in agreement and she said let's just do 60 instead when college was over for everyone etc but God had other plans she didn't stay that long. The first time those she loved most were all in one venue because of her was her funeral which was simply too big to be honest but still a beautiful memory (over 300 people). I look back and realize maybe there really needs to be a compromise not a wedding to start us in debt but one that will celebrate our love and honor both persons in the marriage. It is the couple's day not just the bride's day. Thank you Mr. Harvey this one was really emotional and educational.
I want marry a girl like this 😱❤️
Me too! Because I think she doesn't care about what he got in his bank account
I'm a girl marry me
same here
You broke ass.....lol 😂😂😂
Cheap skate
I'm with the girl on this. None of the drama is necessary
Honestly, I'd go with her idea as well.
You don't find girls like that very often who thinks about saving money
Everyone is different and their personalities are different. Some people hate being the center of attention that’s why they want a small wedding it really just depends on the individuals if you’re able to afford it go ahead but don’t go all out when you know you can’t afford it. Terrible way to start off your life is in debt
About time someone realised it's not all about the woman sometimes... It's a special day for both of them not just the woman.
Unless she is distressed by what the man wants because they can't afford what he wants.
I love when James and Steve give advice together!
A wedding is sharing love and to Enjoy the warmth and friendship of your friends and family ❣️
Finally, Someone !!!! Yesss
I'm with her on this one! Getting everyone together is what family reunions are for!
I can't respect the guest host's simplistic little greeting card-level response. He is just there to sell his book. The bride however seems mature and financially responsible and I am getting the vibe from her body language that the groom is not. They may not be in a position to support the groom's dream of a large family wedding especially since the family evidently is not paying for it. The groom and the guest host should both grow up. I feel sorry for the bride.
I don't agree with James, except that people being involved in your wedding celebration can create good memories. A wedding is not about everyone else in your life. It is the joining together of a man and woman under God, and that should be the focus, not the festivities. And, if your family wants you to have a big wedding, let them help you pay for it. Big weddings are expensive. They can easily top $50,000. If they can't afford it, don't have it. Steve's idea on compromise isn't bad though.
you can have a really intimate and beautiful wedding with your loved ones ( not you second cousin's high school ex-girlfriend) without spending too much money. and your going to have good memories and there will be less gossip behind you back about why you served 50 different meals and not a hundred.
You are talking about marriage
bad advice, while it might be feel good advice, your wedding should be what you can afford. true-blue friends and family will love you regardless of how your wedding turns out. never spend all your money on a wedding
Wym
Amen! He preached a word right there!
I think this is one of the best videos I have watched in my life so far!
Great advise, even greater response from Steve.
This is truly amazing! I’m glad he has shared such beautiful knowledge
He changed my mind too!!
Well this has changed my mind ..I never wanted a wedding .but this dude just changed my thought. ✌
WOW! That funeral statement was powerful ♥️♥️
Powerful only if no one's heard of family reunions. Terrible advice that is more likely to get them into his office than keep them out of it.
To be fair James did not say whether the wedding should be large. He said to make sure the people that love and support them both are there. Cost and size doesn’t play a part in that. I noticed one comment saying their most memorable wedding was in someone’s backyard where their aunts cooked. Size is irrelevant, but the people involved, at least in my eyes, are part of what make the special day so special.
sorry for your loss james❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ dont give up stay positive 😭💪💪 stay strong ❤❤
Thanks for your kind words and thanks for watching!
stay positive 💪💪 and i didnt expect u to reply but have a wonderful day and Think about good things❤❤💪💪
It was such a perfect advice. I somehow changed my mind of what I usually believed in marriage. I really did learn so much from it!
Great advice. It has changed my answer too!
Man has very good advice, especially about the funeral. Oh Gosh
LITERALLY THE BEST ADVICE EVER IN THE WORLD
I.love the episode when steve bring this man with him
Lol her expression is killer!!! Her Expression"This is some b.s." lol She is not hearing it!!
Steve's strength is that he is always open to other points of view and humble enough to go along with them if he sees they are valid. That's why he's wise.
Yes! God I love the Steve Harvey show, best!
Beautiful couple:o) I pray they had a blessed wedding day and their marriage is growing from strength to strength IJN :o)
I was like her for my wedding and my husband was like him. What changed my mind was also my mom. From the time I was little she always fantasised bout limos to my wedding because she and my dad couldnt afford a big one. However, we stuck to people who knew about our relationship and were there for us through the whole thing and who we know would be there for us should anything arise. We ended up with about 100/115 people. And 3/4 of that was family. I don't for one minute regret that day. It was fairly expensive but, to see my family and his so happy, was priceless
Wow! This video is SPOT ON! THANK YOU STEVE HARVEY, for having this Speaker,
THIS INFO, is so Important!!! I love this video!!! Thank you!!! :)
I like this answer!!
Mr Sexton, that was one of the most beautiful advice I've ever heard, thank you
Wowww that advice was amazing
love this...so true!!!!
Looking at my third and final wedding within the next year or 2, thank God, and I agree with both. We talked about just getting married alone and surprising everyone with a reception later, complete with a pretty white dress, even if it only costs $20. At the same time this will be his second and final wedding, and there are tons of people who know and love him, and want to witness his special day, and I hate to begrudge them that.
Wow! What a great perspective!
Thank u
Great advice from Steve and the Attorney. Compromise so the wedding budget remains affordable and only invite people who really matter to you.
I love this show
lol steves vids always make me laugh
Wow that was incredible what he said!
That was so deep!! Both answers!!
Wow well said ❤❤❤❤
In my experience the marriges with small and humble weddings stay longer and healthier than the very flashy ones...
Very true!
So true!! Steve abt the wedding list
I hate to say it but damn John was right. He got me with his advice and his story at his wedding there's something really special about having a room full of people in a room who love you. I almost forgot I don't think I have had a room full not since my college graduation or sweet 16. I have seen my family on numerous occasions but there's something very beautiful about finding the love of your life especially when you've been through a journey of break ups, bad relationships, okay relationships, and experiences. When you find that one it's meant to be shared with everyone who you can afford to have there and wish you well. There's no feeling better in the world than seeing your best friend marry the love of their life , be in the wedding, and then see them have children too. He got me with this one I have to save this video changed my perspective on it. It is worth it having the wedding big or small. Great advice 😁👍🏽Steve and John.
Beautiful words from James Sexton. Like Steve, I never thought of a wedding like he put it.
Settle down. You’ll die alone anyway.
If you can’t agree you can always do what my bestie did. She had a small wedding with just them and some family, and then invited everyone else to a big party after. That way they had the best of both worlds.
I never saw it his way, nicely put. I always thought the way the girl did.
Vow renewal with everyone there but if you can’t afford it then just have a small wedding
Thank you for adding captions for your deaf and hard of hearing viewers! This video has enlightened me. So... well... done!!!
Lovely speech I now want to get married
wow, that's deep
What a sweet couple!
Great video!
I can't believe it's the girl saying this! Lucky guy!
I never thought of it like that wow
Well said James! its very true the wedding is not only for bride/groom its for the whole family and friends.
Have a small wedding and a big pot luck reception. You can play the video of the courthouse or small church wedding there along with pics of then and your life before marriage. People that love you won't mind bringing the mac & chz and a case of beer or a bottle. They won't. Because they love you and want to help you celebrate.
So true!!!...You know that home cooked food would taste even better than the catered food. Plus with friends/family to celebrate would make it even better!!
I like the show it widened my mind
The bride basically just said she wanted a smaller/simple thing. Im sure she wasn't trying to exclude the parents and close friends regardless. All about compromise, like Steve said.
one in a million of this girl
Have the wedding you can afford to give, but by all means celebrate the union. A lot of support is needed after for years to come.
Baby no! Save your money!
Divorced Lawyer 😁😁
At times the people who give us the best advises have made the ''most'' mistakes where they ca give us good advice from. Sometimes these people as well fall in the pit of '' I'm a counselor, we'll figure it out!''
Thank you to your guest speaker’s comments. I personally agree with him. Marriage gives capacity for a public announcement/celebration, an invitation to others to come celebrate with us, our marriage. In so doing, it is a statement of expressing love, giving and receiving love from each other and the people you invite. As well, it is an expression of gratitude.
My own mom passed on in January of this year, two days before her 93rd birthday,🎉. I am her only child, the only reason I wanted siblings so they would get in trouble instead of me ... yes, she could get quite snarky at times. The comment I made at my mom’s celebration of life ceremony, “if there were one thing I was going to say, it is that she cared”. I, also, had a large wedding, not my first choice. Do I regret it, absolutely not.
Yassssss I agree with him but I'm still gonna have a small wedding
Nice advice
I was like that girl, i didn't want a big wedding, because i thought nothing good happens when big families gather, i was worried that someone will end up fighting( i know it sounds stupid) but i ended up having quite a big wedding, where both side families, relatives and friends gathered and i really had a lot of fun, and people at our wedding had fun it turned out to be a blessing. My uncle has passed away not a long time ago and he was at the wedding. But the only thing that guy didn't mention is that marriage is a union of man woman and God. God makes two into one and guides and helps families to go through life challenges and for love to grow stronger. Many people these days leave God out of relationships, marriages and life all together that is why so many of them crumble. That's why people when they get married feel that their relationship was stronger before marriage, because devil don't want people to get married and he wants to destroy marriages, and he attacks all marriages that were not built on Christ, therefore they stand no chance.
I haven't read anything so true on social media. God bless you for this comment. Hope it will bring light into someone's life.
That counselor missed the target with that unnecessary speech
I have never been the type of woman that wanted to get married. After managing a divorce firm for 14 years, I *REALLY* decided marriage was not for me. However James shared a memory of his wedding that was so special, like Steve, my mind has been changed.
If it wasn't a memory of the chicken dance it would have been another one from the day. She was his mom. Memories are going to be made anyway. No one has to go into debt to make them. I just can't take the guy seriously.
Deep answer from doctor Sexton. 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Oufff. James gave me tears.
James Sexton is just the truth. His words are so powerful and just genuine and real
Damn that was deep
That is true
Celebrating together does it equal celebrating lavishly, celebrating beyond your means... Celebrate together within limits, know your boundaries.
Money comes and goes... famous last words 😅