Metal Gear Survive (Zero Punctuation)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ก.ย. 2024
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_"It is occasionally not boring"_ Ben Crowshaw
Quick, Konami, plaster that all over the game box, that is the single highest piece of praise this game will _ever_ receive.
Graeme Vaughey coming from yahtzee, that is FUCKING AMAZING
at least then people might buy it because ZP had something to do with it.
How dare he off-handedly, give that game a mild compliment!?
Graeme Vaughey
Yep, and "occasionally not boring" is the highest praise this is deserving of.
Nathan Clark
I don't get where people are coming from with comments like this. Yes, he is a reviewer that predominantly focuses on the negative aspects of a game, but just because he was able to come up with more negative things about other games doesn't mean it was good; in fact he does actually talk about more positive aspects of games he does like. It means it was so bland he barely could come up with anything to distinguish between positive and negative to begin with. And in a lot of ways, that is even worse than an asset flip Steam game.
4:42 Now THAT'S Zero Punctuation
Zero P is his rapping name
Lay a backing track under that shit.
Hit that 1.75, and open up a dimensional rift.
The man's still got it after all these years
Try watching it at 2x
Konami developers: our left leg is in a bear trap!
Konami executive: well saw the right one off
Konami devs: thanks!
Balance
metal gear used to be solid. now it's just trying to survive.
TheIntergalacticN 10/10 comment.
TheIntergalacticN do you feel proud?
Solid Comment... Mind to take liberties?
Remember the the time it was rising now it just tries to survive
Ba dum TIS
Actually most of these bad choices are made by the LEADER of konami who is... The most loonatic person ever... Hes in charge because he directed a succesfull MOBILE PHONE GAME ...
No wonder they went down this rout.
alex_9000 u wot?
aylamaiia seriously look up what the new leader of Konami made before being in Charge ITS FUCKING HORRENDOUS!
This explains a lot of things
Japanese public loves mobile games a lot
4:45 jesus christ. That's why it's called "ZERO PUNCTUATION"....
Konami Exec 1: We are losing money, the only thing keeping us afloat as a game company is Kojima
Exec 2: You're right! Lets fire him.
Exec 1: That sounds like a great idea!
Honestly #FucKonami
Actually Kojima was sinking their business with his insanely bloated budgets and long development times.
Gaming was actually always a small portion of their income, they make way more in pachinko. Kojima games made their money, but just not as much.
Their profit margins were slim with his insane budgets. Now they're laughing as Sony enters that sinkhole with the insanity that is death stranding. I mean look at that thing, hollywood actors, tons of CGI trailers. They're never making their money back on that thing.
breadordecide yeah, but at least people are loving sony and for it, meanwhile Konami is just getting shit on by everybody
It did work out pretty nice for konami after Kojima left, small budgets and no sales extreme hate, i see as a big win situation.
And as sony doesn't need profit for his games that badly, a 10/10 exclusive would rack in more money anyway, i'm on board.
4:44 When you try to steal the world record from eminem by speaking as fast as you can :D
United Potatoes Boomhauer award
United Potatoes Best thing is, it's actually understandable.
United Potatoes
John Machito JR lost it?
Isn't that Jay Z's new album?
Ah my friend you forget the micromachines man
Don't you love it when Yahtzee proves as to why his series is called Zero Punctuation?
Love that image of Metal Gear Survive dragging itself back to Konami with three arrows in its back going "They weren't into it." Add a pitchfork and torch wielding mob following him and that's a 100% accurate representation of the reception Survive got on release.
As someone who has english as their second language, you were speaking so gosh darn diddly fast in the last minute I had to slow the video down and use subtitles just to understand what you were saying. lol
ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴀʀʏꜰᴀɴʙoʏ Pretty much all his reviews are like that--but he streams and talks at a normal human pace then :D
Welcome to Zero Punctuation reviews.
English is my only language and I could barely keep up.
Welcome to zero punctuation.
He is like this because he uses zero punctuations.
ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴀʀʏꜰᴀɴʙoʏ you're new here, aren't you
4:45 Wow, Yahtzee is indeed the zero punctuation master.
In defense of why Big Boss doesn't hire people who doesn't look grizzy
He punch the living shit out of them and send them up to orbit by a damn balloon, remember?
That sound like a headache and brain damage.
Yahtzee: Mentions Silent Hills.
Me: Cries in the corner.
That tourist joke is top notch. Almost chocked to death thanks to it.
Maybe Metal Gear Survive takes place in an alternate universe where the Decepticons won the war for Cybertron and corrupted humanity with Dark Energon.
Konami aren't inventive enough to think of something slightly above lazy.
deus vult this sounds like it was written by a 12 year old on an extreme coco-pops high
He never touched on how they require you to buy save slots.
Shit another book? I haven't even started "will save the Galaxy for food"
The way he said "We really fucking aren't" was so evocative goddamn.
Is it just me or does Yahtzee sound realy pissed about the fact, that he can't just call the game unmitigated crap?
He does enjoy a good field day tearing apart the undeniably shitty. It's like a hobby for him. So yes, it denied him his favorite pasttime.
I’m surprised Yahtzee didn’t mention the character save micro transactions. That’s plenty reason to “burn the studio down.”
To be fair, it's really only as good as it is because of the engine, which they just took from MGSV anyway.
It's not a character save its an entire new character that can use and adds to your current stocked resources over all characters. Plus I've also been showered with enough premium currency from daily logins to get an extra character if I wanted it. It's just like paying for FOB's.
You say that like it's a good thing. The fact that not only is another save locked behind a "micro"transaction, but ALSO having that extra character actively make your original character better is just gross. Games shouldn't be a fucking job that you clock into each day, and then get rewarded with scrip that can only be spent at the company store, to buy equipment that should have just been given to you in the first place.
Y'know, given the subject matter and the reviewer, this review is unusually kind
The only one trying to survive here is my dignity after playing this game.
Already dead :D
We still love you.
I really enjoy the speed he talks, it's only a tiny bit quicker than everyone I know talks (when they know what they are talking about), except with no punctuation, that's why I like it, no messing around, and I find the humor quite funny.
Dat triple AAA rant at the end tho.
Metal Gear Survive should just a two separate big DLC for MGS5, one is this the survive the zombie and the other is co-op online campaign.
This is first time i am watching this show and i get it why it is called zero punctuation.
RIP Metal Gear. You will live on in things that have fucking nothing to do with Metal Gear but with your name slapped on
2:35 YAHTZEE, PULL OUT, YOU'RE SHOWING EMOTION
Calling it now.
This is #5 in the bland list.
Minimum, 3 max
I'd say #3 which is really the worst place to be on that list because it doesn't stand out enough even in being bland to be above or below it.
I'll be surprised it's not in the 'meh' position of 3rd in the top blandest games of 2018.
vinnythewebsurfer I would say 3rd. Because, you know, being bland but not bland enough to make it the most bland is a feat in of itself
I’m from the future to tell All of you that you’re wrong. It’s his 3rd worst.
Man, the attempt at breaking the world record for fastest talker got me rolling.
You really hit the zero punctuation towards the end there Yahtzee.
4:45 That fast talking fucking killed me. XD
give me the pachinko machine and bugger off. Watching a metal ball bouncing around is more fun that about 90% of the games being made this year and last year and the year before that.
Blandest game of 2018?
Pyre Light nope
WORST (who know, maybe many morebto come)
I wouldn't go that far with the "worst". MGS (not to confuse with Solid) is just incessantly mediocre, and would have probably gone by without fanfare were it not part of a recognized franchise. The worst games of the year are games that barely function, that drive you insane just by looking at them, things that Man should have never conceived for they are considered acts against God.
same, as for worst, I'd probably give that to hunt down the freeman (if you can even call that a game).
Nah. Game isn't even that bad. Just mind numbingly mediocre.
Pyre Light He should have a list of Laziest Games where clearly the studio put minimal effort into the actual game. It wpuld definitely fit there.
@3:18 i believe what you're trying to say is: "they tried pulling a mgs5: ground zero with zero added features, but this time they added microtranactions,because fuck you give us money."
Waiting for the print version of Yahtzee new book.
R.I.P Metal Gear, may it live on forever
Let's all laugh at an industry that never learns anything tee hee hee.
Your breath control in this is amazing
4:45 turbo yahtzee mode engaged
"Occasionally not that boring" should be one of the on-box quotes for the inevitable "complete edition" release
It seems obvious to me why Yahtzee isn't just tearing the game apart. I never got the impression that he liked the other mgs games all that much in the first place. So why would he feel betrayed that it's changing. Every other youtuber actually liked Metal Gear so they can't judge it on its own merits.
Spectre Walkthroughs he also kinda liked MGS V but because of the gamemplay being fun, not any connection to the game's themes or ideas.
2:37 is a line that should be tatood on video game publishers forehead backwards, so they can see it in the mirror every morning
2:26 Mounting an expedition to plunder resources is a very American thing to do, but coming from a British person is rich. "I learned it from you Dad!"
Are tactical farts an actual game mechanic?
2:53 - Yahtzee: "the dialogue scenes never take longer than a few minutes and don't always reiterate the same point over and over again"
Me: *V O C A L C O R D P A R A S I T E*
To be honest, it was actually a kinda fun game if you choose to use weapons other than Spears
I dunno, I liked it. The dust feels pleasantly surreal, like being on the ocean floor except no water. It's decently entertaining
Someone in konami headquarters write now : O shit i fell so bad making mgs survive the guilt and shame that i fell is beyond everythink imagineble .If i could make survive all over again i would make it a batlle rouale game.
"Occasionally not boring"
Well, that's still better than what I expected from it.
Props to you Yahtzee for judging the game on GAMEPLAY. All I hear from everyone else is "WAAAAHHH, NO HIDEO, WAAAHHH, MICROTRANSACTIONS, WAAAHHHH"
It got REALLY zero punctuation at the very end there, excellent :)
Snake snake snaaaaaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkeeeeee!!!!!!!!
On the up side death stranding looks great.
Metal Gear Dies
GammaDelta MG killed in action
Styx Shards of Darkness, It's Thief with a goblin in it. It's totally up your alley
Never thought I'd see the day when Yahtzee gave one of the more favorable reviews of a bad game.
Hey, that’s just as fast as Eminem in Rap God!
And I followed every word he said! Yay.
Imagine expecting a metal gear in metal gear lmao
That last line is genius
$10 to buy a save slot. what kind of world is this?
You didnt even mention the glowing red unicorn horns on the zombies that are obviously repurposed HUD markers so you can tell the difference between a pile of dusty rocks and a crowd of zombiecorns.
He wasn't as angry or disappointed as I thought he would. Huh
Zombie games are a dead genre.
State of decay 2 and the last of us 2 would like a word with you.
Also there hasnt been many zombie games in like a year. (i dont even consider this game really a zombie game)
Also Days Gone.
Good joke you have there, it'd be a shame if it went over people's heads...
ayyyy i see what you did there
fuck you
Zombies have the potential to be very interesting concepts, yet very few can do more with it other than making a bland copy of other successful zombie related stuff.
Damn, and he didn’t even touched upon the save slots.
so... it's a bad version of dragon quest builders
Anyone else notice that the sign on Destiny said " Pay $30 to continue paying?" Not PLAYING. PAYING. Like you have to give them money in order to pay more money
I didn't sign up for british Eminem doing game reviews at Rap God Speeds, but that's what I got
I'm ok with this
He's Australian.
Red Kite He's British but was born in Australia.
Holy crap, you went full-on "micro-machines commercial" about 2/3 of the way through ^_^
#FucKonami
Well, that was basically a recommendation if you take the critic and the source material into perspective
4:44 giving Eminem a run for his money.
I love how Subnautica is already his basis for comparison to every other survival game! :D
Fashionably early, as ever.
read differently morphous, diabalary is a fucking hilarious lunatic
Why are we still here, just to suffer?
Holy crap, how did Yahtzee talk so fast without his lips falling off?!
Huh. Legitimately surprised. Honestly thought Yahtzee would hate it more than Angry Joe. Oh well, one man's trash is another man's slightly less shitty trash :/
vcom741 angry joe is more likely to jump on the bandwagon
Hmm...interesting.
So, what is Yahtzee then? Or any TH-camr who does this for a living for that matter? All of them are here just for fun? Views don't matter to them?
"Can you not read"?
...I don't see what you mean by this.
I would argue Joe also has a good personality.
vcom741 It’s more likely that Yahtzee judges more on gameplay, he did that for Star Wars Battlefront II as well. Skipped over the fandom and micro transactions.
And that's fair. Every reviewer will have different point of view because of different biases.
Joe grew up on Star Wars and Metal Gear, so he has nostalgia for this games, and hates them being done badly.
Yahtzee on the other hand is always objective, never letting any sort of nostalgia blind him.
Holy shit! That was some of the fastest speech I've ever heard. ..you missed your calling as a auctioneer.
I get people saying give it a chance and if you ignore how it missuses the metal gear name it's not that bad. But it goes both ways. It's not good and if it didn't have the metal gear name it wouldn't be getting attention. It's a cash grab and it's forgettable.
deus vult I both agree and disagree. While I see your point this is very different. Acid was an attempt to bring a metal gear like series to portables when they were not sure how to do that. Rising explored the background of a character people we're interested in. This game is not Cannon and has nothing to do with metal gear at all. If it we're not for the engine, the reuse of the map and the opening cut scene it would have absolutely no relation. The only reason it bears the name metal gear is to get people to buy it and to facilitate the laziness of reusing the map and the engine. One could argue virtually the same for acid. And yes this is technically a spin off but the point is why it's a spin-off. And again that is to make more money than it would have on it's own and so they could make an easy zombie game without having to come up with a world for it themselves.
A metal gear to surpass weapon
Basically, the game just says ZOMBIES at you for an hour
and the plot was created by an angsty teenager using Clippy.
So true
The Anti Cancer Lmao
Dapper Changeling you say it like it’s a bad thing
People always diss on Zombies, but don't forget that BO4 is returning the Zombie storyline this year. And the amazing Dying Light, people still, fuck, even the developers are supporting it with free DLC this year.
*saw the the video only had 0 views*
Clicked as fast as a mortal man could
Sees the video already got 2.9k views😑🔫
MidNite Mayhem why do you care how many views a video has?
nochtczar i just wanted to be really early ☺
not worth pulling the trigger over tbh
Destiny 2 and assassins creed origins were a good reference point.
Hey look a decent review where the person plays the game more then 2 fucking hours
this bullshit doesn't deserve to played to begin with
AMR IBRAHIM I beg to dipper
Thicc boi saying a game is occasionally not boring is not praise if a game is only sometimes fun than it has failed at basic game design
Surprisingly positive. Nice to see you give this a fair shake. I wish you had commented a little more on the "feature" that has you pay 10$ for 2nd save slot, but I suppose that's all right.
Low-Fat Milk extra character. People been able to get at least 1 extra so far just because of the events in game. The extra character is to my understanding like another fob in MGSVTPP. Another base to take care of. Everything is linked between both characters as well, eliminating the "survival" aspect of the game. That's all info on this "feature". Sorry in not on the Fuck Konami train.
I'll be surprised if Konami *SURVIVE* as a company after this shit show.
I'll see myself out.
Actually games make only a small percentage of konami's buisness. Most of their money comes from pachinko, fitness gyms and mobile software. So konami will be still up and running for years to come in Japan.
Tchitchouan Inouane Issa joke
They've got alternatives. Just yesterday I was buying yugioh cards and then there's the pachinko machines.
Tchitchouan Inouane Being how one of the biggest problems they had with Kojima was his massive spendings, it wouldn't be a huge surprise that with him gone they can get their financial situation under control. >.>
Tchitchouan Inouane well fuck
4:45 HOLY SHIT YAHTZ!
I was listening at double speed, and when 4:44 came around, I thought I had a manic attack!
I'm gay
Dr. Memes k
No your edward
Still infinitely better than all the "solid" and "survive" puns in the comments
Dr. Memes ......Concratulations???
That's pretty gay tbh
Honestly. None of us deserve Yahtzee. He tells it how it is.
Boom, fifth
By the end Yahtzee's Talking had Reached....... *LUDICROUS SPEED*
3:51 It's kill or be killed.
that undertale joke was so easy, and you still missed
XD
The madman actually did it
Shockingly accurate imho
I still wonder what life would be like if we actually got silent hills
Occasionally not boring
That is the best review I have heard for this game yet
This video gives off a feeling like there was more to it but it stopped anyway.
You know saying "bless him/her/them" is the subtle way of insulting the person.