Do's & Don'ts of Dating in The Philippines... (Pt.1)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 24 มิ.ย. 2024
- If there’s one thing that I and countless other expats have learned about dating in the Philippines it’s that it’s immeasurably different than in the West. As a matter of fact, if you bring your western dating standards here to the Philippines I can almost guarantee that you’ll be left high and dry. That being said, it’s invariably important that you learn the ropes of dating in the Philippines before you come here. Enjoy!
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Timestamps:
0:00 Do's & Don'ts of Dating in The Philippines... (Pt.1)
0:33 Do #1: Court Her
4:13 Don’t #1: Date Casually
5:47 Do #2: Be Romantic
6:55 Don’t #2: Disregard Her Religious Beliefs
8:05 Do #3: Be Generous To Her Family, But Not Too Generous
10:22 Don’t #3: Don’t Assume Intimacy
11:31 God Bless
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Dating in The Philippines, Philippine Relationships, Dating a Filipina, Foreigner With a Filipina, Dating a Filipina Girlfriend, Filipina Girlfriend, Philippines Dating, Foreigner in The Philippines, Foreigner Dating in The Philippines, Philippines Vlog, Philippines,
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her"
Ephesians 5:25
"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her"
Ephesians 5:25
Book a Consultation Call w/ Evan
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Very good ❤❤
Filipinas love to throw the bible at you ("Eye gaw peery" - translation: "I'm God fearing). Then why are all of you trashy single mothers.
❤✝
Any positions you can recommend to “love your wives”
Are you a Paulian?
I'm married to a Filipina that I met in the U.S., so this is a moot point- but as much as I respect the culture in The Philippines, one thing I would never do if I were a young single expat living in The Philippines, is play games. In other words, I wouldn't be interested in a gal who plays hard-to-get. That to me is a red flag and I would want no part of it. Courting is fine, but if she showed no interest in me even if she really was interested, I would take the facade of no interest at face value. I would not beg her to go out with me or continue to pursue her without recipricaton. If she were simply shy, that's fine, she could simply tell me that. But if she pretended not to be interested in me, I'd move on. Game-playing is not good in any relationship, even at the beginning.
I'm with you I can't stand mine game playing crap
Thanks for saying this. It is a little backwards when some filipina play hard-to-get & other mind games. They know foreign men are desirable and have options. So it makes more sense that women would work to get & keep a man, especially men who can turn around and start chatting up the next set of women who walk by.
Yes
A young man having to tell other men how to behave towards a woman shows us how far we have gone from the norm! I'm 61 years old. I grew up with 60's and 70's television and movies. This is what we learned from birth as the way we were suppose to treat a lady! That's why so many of us failed in the west! We didn't know women needed and wanted drama and chaos to be happy! We fell hard...now we can use these traits that are already built in if we meet someone over there? At least that's the hope.
Please continue making these kinds of videos! It was by far the best detailed courting video that I have seen...Thank you!
It's retarded and you don't have to do any of it. I left Thailand to renew a visa in Manilla and slept with 6 women in 7 days, either from meeting at the mall or Tinder. As they say, Filipinas welcome foreigners with legs wide open! Why else would they have images of a white Jesus (their apparent God) or name themselves after a white King named Philip or have most of their celebrities as mixed Eurasians.
I learned the hard way, like a bull in a china shop, I guess I will have to wait until I get there, I've learned my lessons and courting is the proper way Dating with intent
Thanks Evan
Of course Bud
What a blessing you are, Evan. I have watched sooo many Philippine dating videos from a foreigner's perspective. Yes, you too are a foreigner but you have a unique perspective. I subbed because you mentioned our awesome savior. He is truly our all in all. I am hoping to find a Bible believing fellowship first and foremost when I arrive in the Philippines. Thank you for all the tips on this subject matter. You summed it all up perfectly with Ephesians 5:25. I look forward to more of your videos and thank you my brother. Mark in Dallas.
Great stuff. I definitely want to see more videos like this! Thank!!!
Great video and informative!
Good job. Keep going. We have your back 🎉🎉🎉🎉
Loved this, Evan.
This is really good info Evan. I'm still single and plan to be for a long time but if I start dating a filipina I'll come back to this
This video was really great. Who knew? (courting). 🤷♂️😅 I like it. 👍
Keep this stuff coming! 😎
Love this video. More of this, please.
You got it!
Based on the attitudes that you describe, along with LOTS of Filipinos preferring the look of light skinned western women, a LOT of Filipinas will end up unmarried.
Definitely part two. Western culture is definitely different than Philippine culture. You’re doing a good job young man
This is one of the more comprehensive & eye opening videos about this. Thanks for candidly sharing about this! It’s almost cultural protocol for Filipina to “play hard-to-get.” It’s an antiquated and archaic way of protecting a Filipina’s chastity as well as her family reputation. (Esp in the provinces/more conservative areas) women who are open and honest with any non-related male is seen as a spoiled brat and her parents are weak, or she’s a slut.
Another piece that, from my perspective, is overlooked is “courting.” For foreigners & Balikbayan single men, this means making a grand gesture by taking the family out to dinner. You have to win the family over in order to date your love interest… Not just her parents &/or siblings… lolo & Lola, Tito & Tita and other significant extended family. “Winning” the family over is proving you can financially take care of your love interest AND her aging parents (even if you may be near her parents’ age or older). This is the dark side of “courting”. There’s nothing romantic about it, there’s nothing ethically or morally better about it… it’s just a practice from older times & a bit clannish. There’s SO much to say about this topic. These dating practices are actually hurting Filipina women because more men are valuing themselves and finding Filipina who are willing to be courageous & vulnerable enough to say “yes” to what they want and take a chance on a guy who has a lot of love to give.
Definitely start working on part 2😂
Part 2 please 😊
Secret to Dating always "Pick the puppy that picked you first" life is much easier if she chases you, every women ive met asked me to get married, not that the marriage will last but sadly , the more you don;t really care the more they want you.
This is spot on. But i would like to add that if a man is a foreigner the courting part can be until marriage and you need to ask for her father's permission. Reason I say that is because foreigners do not have a lot of time in the Philippines when visiting so we do not have the time to take things really slow but, you have to make it clear to the Filipina you want something serious and have marriage in mind. Otherwise she might leave you. Also you need to ask the Filipina to be your girlfriend it's not assumed like the west, so the man needs to put a label/define the relationship.
So true with that last part. It’s almost like there’s 2 proposals: one for gf/bf relationship, the 2nd for marriage. How’d I learn this? The hard way, of course. 🙄
@silentwolf6532 Yeah, I kind of did the first courting process with my Filipina lady did not ask her parents permission to date her, but I took her out on dates and spent time with her then I asked her to be my girlfriend. But the second courting is the most important, you need to ask her parents permission for marriage. I think that is a non-negotiable
Good information to know. That "conservative" term is tattooed in my mind now.
GREAT PER USUAL...BRAVO------
Courting???? That's what my grandparents did!...... And I'm 53!
It's quite simple...don't come to the Philippines hoping to 'catch' a Filipina. My wife is a Filipina whom I met when we both lived/worked in Hong Kong. We met at a christening party held by mutual friends where we stood as godparents - just us, not the typical multitude of godparents one often sees at a baptism here in the Philippines where the title is accorded more to give face than for any other reason.We are both Catholics and fairly conservative. The child's mother asked me because she knew I would take it seriously due to my beliefs.My wife and I genuinely 'courted' for 6 months, married, set up a home together and had a child. Four years later, we moved to the Philippines so she could be near her family. However, I made it clear that our family came first, not hers. They can look out for themselves, but we do employ family members in our business and support a couple of the kids who were diligent enough to earn a place at university but there are no handouts.
My experience with a Filipina (Cebu) was completely the opposite of what this video tells. Met her mom, dad & brother. Thank goodnes she only has one sibling.
Well said regarding religion.👍
Amen! The only way
The courtship process in the PH has actually changed and somewhat "modernized", some women actually dictate when you become a suitor(the person courting), but it requires a lot of commitment from the suitor, but that being said its the men who DTR (define the relationship), courtship lasts for 3-6months depends on the person you're courting
Im filipino so I know
I, initially, was looking at the Philippines for early retirement, but have zero interest in dating/marriage again. Realizing how thirsty the women are there makes me rethink about considering the Philippines.
You simply need to establish dominance up front.
Be very clear on what you offer and what you expect.
And as with any sales job, you will get 100 no answers for every yes answer.
@@sosodave4192.... I don't want to date any woman... ever again.
Courtship to westerners? Almost impossible bcos of their culture of everything is INSTANT.
I would like to hear stories westerners courting/ligaw a girl.
I have to check to see if I’ve been living in the Philippines now. I have not met any Pinays like the ones you describe here. It seems to me that the vast majority of Pinays are looking for money from foreigners. Period.
Philippines changed a lot as a society since social media came. Western influence rapidly crept in. I see signs of modern feminism now.
I'm a filipino man with a fsmily here in the Philippines
in the philippines courting first then if the woman accept the man then proceed to dating and if ur meant for each other ...then marriage is the final moved and also with parents consent most of the time
I just love your videos. Sometimes you make laugh. I love to meet you one day for coffee. When I move to the Philippines
Is there a part 2?
"Women" and "Woman" are different words friends. :P
Twenty years ago I didn't have any chance to marry a Christian in China, I had to wait and pray until God's time!
My husband ( An American missionary)and I have been married for 22 years, we love each other deeply and we have been serving God with one heart and one mind.
Praise the Lord❤❤
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?
Are you a Paulian?
Most guys don't wait around with out any action they move on to the next girl who shows them intrest in the philippines My ex gave it up after 3 months of us dating there.. And Yes I courted her and had her dads blessing haha..
But I found the Wrong girl LOL
Not a great move. I hope you don’t do that again.
Women or women wherever they come from so if you think the Filipinos are different, you’re mistaken. They may be a little more feminine compared to the west, but the software is the same. In fact, you need to watch them even closer because they’re not very forthcoming with their intentions.
Interesting vid. I've been living in sa Pilipinas since Nov of '23. Before that I lived here for six years albeit twenty years ago, 1998 to 2004. Mahabang kwento.
I am concerned about getting all the proper documentation needed for social security and my bank (Charles Schwab). I don't know how to use Instagram, pawatin.
A large number of male westerners approach to Filipinas is, "I'm here for a good time, not a long time."
What goes around comes around. Dimple wheel of life.
Ultimately the expectation is marriage at a younger age. Are women who are well into their 30s and 40s open to permanent long term relationships without getting married? Not sure I could do that again honestly.
My GF says she wants to marry already, but I haven't even been in person with her. But we are on face chat everyday for a long time so far, so maybe that's ok right
Dude dont.. You got to question yourself, why is she talking to foreigners online? Why is she rushing to get married? Am i the only guy shes talking to? Answer is green card and yes she's talking to other foreign men. You sir took the baid. Dont be a Cuck.. meet her first and see what she is like.
It's similar to date in Korea, for example. The good ones, I mean.
There’s a few million single mothers to testify that what you say is not true. Amongst the highest strata of Philippines society things may work like this. These women marry within the 200 or so rich families with money and often political power. They have no use for foreigners. In fact , they look down on us
Expats are here for two reasons, cheap living and easy women
Do a part 2 my friend I am learning from you
My first trip to the Phillippines, my mom's best friend from school made my mom get her a TV, a fridge and an AC unit.... I was super pissed and said WTF is this? Is this a trip? or UN humanitarian missopm??
Interesting video because when expats have gone on a single date that Filipina considers that her and him are now in a relationship. It's now called instant girl friend. There isn't any courting at least not with the modern Filipina.
A lot of this advice is overstated. If you're a foreigner, most Filipinas will not expect you to follow the traditional Filipino ways of "courting" and everything else. They know your culture is different, and they are willing to meet you half way, or in many cases, they are willing to adopt your western style of dating entirely-and it doesn't mean she is a bad girl.
Evan! I will make sure to go to the local Pentecostal Church of God to seek my future Filipina spouse! That video was a scared me straight video. Salamat po👮🏽♂️
Friends
Friends? It's very hard to escape " The Friend Zone" in any culture. Courtships is important, but being honest in your intentions I would think would be more important?
I wonder if the same rules apply to gay relationships. Marriage is, of course, not the end goal until it is legal in PH, but I would be interested to know if the process and attitudes are the same or similar to straight relationships.
Hmmm not all, but in my case i met my ex thru fb, we became friends for a year after finally had the chance ton court him for 3 months
if no sex after a few months of dating its a No go lol time to move on....
So, waiting to go to the Bar, or massage parlor, or dating a girl 20 + years younger than me is not the best way to meet a good high-quality Filipina? Being doing this all wrong ..haha
Cover up, scrawny.
This is fairytale land stuff. Life is really not like this regardless of how society and others try to convince you that this is the norm.
fairytale? if you cannot relate to this in real life, then you are NOT pursuing the traditional, decent Filipina. You might be talking to low quality women, scammers, bar girls etc.
If you are given these tips and norms and still contradict, do not complain if you get scammed.
Ok. Now tell us why there are legions of single mothers ? Your description applies to a small number of women
Bingo. Conservatism runs about as far as an aversion to birth control. 🎉
So many men in The Phiippines split and runaway once they have kids.
Dating is way better in America you get to know someone have a nice time out and maybe a relationship starts or you move on.
Also, with Internet dating, Filippinas are not so prudish. They are more willing to you know ...
Then stay in America then sheesh 🫠
@miguelventura345 lol.
I would have, but I had 4 " traditional" women " courting" me.
They all had jobs and businesses.
For various reasons, they consider foreign men a great catch. And they're willing to bend the rules of courting....
It's nonsense, they will bend rules, I'm talking about women who aren't scammers. I just want a foriegner...
I enjoy your work, yes now how do I, a successful American man get myself a beautiful Philippines lady from say the country not a city girl
The real question is, "Why Filipino Men don't want to date Filipino Women?" I'm Filipino myself, and I found Filipinas are high maintenance, and so maarte, which is a turn off for me. I would rather date a Chinese, Korean, and Japanese.
So Filipinas want men to SIMP HARD first 😅, F that, I’m only dating fast women
THESE ARE NOT APPLICABLE IN THE LARGE CITIES SUCH AS CEBU, MANILA, ETC. ANOTHER POINT WHICH IS RATHER DISTURBING IS THAT YOU ALWAYS BRING AMERICANS AS A COMPARISON LIKE IF THERE WERE NOT ANY OTHER NATIONALITIES. WHAT THE BIG DEAL ABOUT AMERICANS? IT IS A COUNTRY THAT GOES DOWN DAY IN DAY OUT. STOP MAKING COMPARISONS WITH JUST AMERICANS.
I’m glad I met my wife in America 😂
Same here.
This is BS . The best thing to do this make your own rules. By the way I'm in the Philippines and dating and making my own rules is the best way.
I'm used to western dating standards, but can't stand the women in general. I love the Pinay charisma, but i'm not so patient with the courting proceedures. I'm a US citizen, half pinoy half white and moved away from the Philippines when I was 12. 46 now. I have no idea how I will be looked at by the women, in many aspects.
Hahaha 😊Please pray for your marriage in God’s hands. .
Amen 🙏
Can you French kiss her with tongue in the movie house
Chocolates rot teeth
Are you kidding me?
I’m not!
This guy is perpetuating a myth. Your average Filipina’s beddable after one date. That’s why expats are in Philippines. They are not there for the food (awful).
Maybe the highest class of women need “ courting” but these women marry amongst their rich families. Don’t need foreigners
He's too young to know what he's talking about.
Evan already warned you about the pitfalls. If you don't want to believe him, do your own thing but be sure you have a parachute and a cure for your broken heart or wallet.
@@SelwynClydeAlojipan Correct. In between the whores and the hi society types there are decent women But you’re right. More whores than decent
Dating in the Philippines is NOT LIKE YOU DO IN THE WEST.
Why? We aren't westerners.
You in the west start with dating, then proposal then wedding.
We in the Philippines start from friendship like from childhood friend, school or work. Like you begin as friends that is where you start your hunt for a potential partner. Then courting. If she don't like you as a life partner then it ends there. If that woman likes or love you then she will say that she loves you then dating starts there. that is where your happy days as a man start. Then before propsal you must visit the woman's parents to ask her hand in marriage. They may have terms which you may agree or not. It's your call. Then proposal then marriage.
I'm a filipino man with a filipino wife living in the Philippines.
This is the best way to "screen, profile and investigate" back ground. Go the long process. Patience is a virtue.
These expats want traditional women, but aren’t willing to do the work?? No wonder American women have a bitter view of men. I’m starting to have some sympathy. Stay in America bruv
And women in America are lining up for Philippino men??
Lol
It's all BS. Women are quickly identifying their worth which is good. So they should never be taken advantage of in the BS of being "traditional" and have a say in the relationship. My $.02
Philippina''s should go out with Only Men from the Philippines who are thieir own kind.....Bottom line!