I’m a former 11b and was trying to reclassify to 88n re-upped for 4 years to get it just to end up not getting to reclassify because my unit was deploying. Even though I was left behind in the rear detachment my UIC showed me deploying which voided me reclassing but didn’t void the contract so I gave them 4 years for free….
5:00 At The reflection in her helmet. She's not flying the plane. She is on the co-pilot seat. I think the military is hurrying beautiful women to recruit.😂
Now she is not. Because she was holding on for their life. Probably first time I'm flying. She wasn't doing the routine electronic check. She is just sitting there pretty holding for the cockpit From the high g. Turns.
Nikko I was as 95C way back when stationed at the Fort Sill RCF in Oklahoma.......Shepard AFB used to bring up their Red Cycle people to us to try a "Scared Straight" program.... was not sure it worked well at all. Used to do the "I will do 10 push ups for every one you can do"!! Never did more than 40 push ups.....
Worst retention mistake was during my Iraq deployment, I got fed up being a corporal for 2 years because points were maxed so I reclassed to corrections specialist for 4 years and $5k. (Bonus I got promoted in AIT because I made points in current prior MOS.)
Not my NCO story but my uncle is a veteran and he had a private who was trying to shoot a M-4, without a magazine, and when he was asked why he was trying to do it, he looked at it and asked my uncle why it wasn’t shooting. He did this, after basic training.
68W here, I had a PFC buy his unlicensed wife a brand new car. She proceeded to hit a pedestrian and get arrested. He called me to ask if AER covers bail.
8:18 Damn, when I was in there were no reenlistment bonuses. So every 4 years I was like, "Do I really want to do this again even if I've got more chevrons on my sleeve?" Seriously, I questioned every reenlistment. It happened like 4 times. So then I was at 20, and I was like yeah that's enough. lol
I think he was just pointing out it isn't that crazy that navy has better pilots. Army, Navy, and Airforce all have pilots and they all receive the proper training to perform their MOS. There is bound to be pilots not in the chair force that are better. It's not like we train army and navy pilots less than air force@@travismorris5903
I re-enlisted for 4 years just to get my E5... I was about to get out and they were like "Hey.... would you stay if we gave you E5. No board no points just straight E5." I went for it and regretted it.
As I told my hubs when he was trying to get hired as a CO at a prison "dont lie but don't offer up any info they cant find on their own/prove" 😂😂😂😂 the he proceeded to answer "yes" when they ask if he has had depression 😑 because at some point in his teens early 20s he was sad from time to time over things that were happening in his life. Never even went to see anybody about it 😂😂 he didn't get hired
Had a buddy get orders to go to a base near his home town, he leaves for a TDY and decides he’s going to wait until he gets back to work on the paperwork. He gets back from his TDY and starts filling out paperwork and gets an email saying he’s lost his orders. So he reaches out to our leadership, they tell him that if he *re-enlists* he’ll get his orders back (meaning he lost them due to retention) so he does so, re-ups for another 4, then the air force absolutely shafts him and sends him to Minot. He has multiple people at the base that he was close with (leadership wise) so he thought he’d be getting the LE side, well he got the nukes side and his wife left him due to him being gone so often.
Air Force - poodle 🐩
Navy - golden retriever
Army- German shepherd
Marines- pit bull with rabies
You forgot the
Coast Guard - Pomeranian😂
Space Force?
Space Force- Chinese Crested
Marine Corp is literally the Pitbull named fucking Sugar
im 12 and want to join marines my brothwr is a sargent in the core
I’m a former 11b and was trying to reclassify to 88n re-upped for 4 years to get it just to end up not getting to reclassify because my unit was deploying. Even though I was left behind in the rear detachment my UIC showed me deploying which voided me reclassing but didn’t void the contract so I gave them 4 years for free….
bro is on a roll 🗣️😭😭
FACTS!
Fr bro
Army does go rolling along!
Every day😂
“Im a privateeee”-Nikko
Ima per-rivate! Is the best thing I ever heard on this channel
5:00 At The reflection in her helmet. She's not flying the plane. She is on the co-pilot seat. I think the military is hurrying beautiful women to recruit.😂
She might be the WSO
Now she is not. Because she was holding on for their life. Probably first time I'm flying. She wasn't doing the routine electronic check. She is just sitting there pretty holding for the cockpit From the high g. Turns.
"Why don't you cry about it?!"
*Cry about it ✨on the inside✨*
Nikko I was as 95C way back when stationed at the Fort Sill RCF in Oklahoma.......Shepard AFB used to bring up their Red Cycle people to us to try a "Scared Straight" program.... was not sure it worked well at all. Used to do the "I will do 10 push ups for every one you can do"!! Never did more than 40 push ups.....
Three things you should never tell your recruiter: Your last name, your first name, your social security number.
9:10
That woman said the quiet part out loud.
Thank you.
11:39 - thank you for your cervix
That glove one is actually genius! 😂
1:51 that’s Valkyrie Brynn her videos are hilarious
Been waiting to see their crossover. I find her hilarious, too.
Nikko never fails to make me laugh when I'm sad tbh 💀
Lol boot flex, "check out my whip! Only 189% APR" lol
Bro the “Khalid what is this…. A boom!” Had me dying for like 5 minutes
Don't be giving Lil kids candy. Wtf. 😂😂😂
Nikko always has the best videos on youtube
4:47 it is a F-16 Fighting Falcon
7:02 she's literally just trying to make any excuse she can😂
"What's up everybody welcome back to my TH-cam channel" *shoves mic in booty cheeks abruptly* LMFAO
Its a good time when nikko posts. I love your stuff dude!
11:12 recruiter be like “Oh! I thought you said *INFANT* and not infantry! LawLzeez!!!111”
@6:56 The only reason your CAC is blocked is because you entered your PIN in wrong more than three times.
I just got back from MEPs the other day and with the new system they have they can see all your medical records btw 😭
I’m going to meps on Friday… fingers crossed
@@margareterrickson6019 MEPs is easy but I leave for the physical fitness camp April 15 🫡
11:55 😂"YAAAAAAAAA!"
*Starts throwing it back*😂
Ass jumpscare
Nothing hits like watching new military fails while eating chipotle in the parking lot
I can feel my knees. 😢😢😢
9:50 my kid was gonna reenlist until he was deployed and now he just wants to come home…
“Uh Khed what is this a boom”
😂🤣😂🤣💀💀💀
12:50 "nOoOoooOoo pleAsE nOo" 😭😂
😂😂
You know its gonna be a good day if nikko posts just before you go to work or school
Worst retention mistake was during my Iraq deployment, I got fed up being a corporal for 2 years because points were maxed so I reclassed to corrections specialist for 4 years and $5k. (Bonus I got promoted in AIT because I made points in current prior MOS.)
3:03 wait till the NCO using tik tok see this shit😂
90K for 5 years...that was after my 20K enlistment bonus...plus I was in the Air Force, so it came with the best chair you could imagine!!
14k a year and a chair, maybe I should join
You aren't getting a bonus like that bud. They aren't really doing bonuses like that these days.@gavinc1539
Bro I signed 6 years for 15k damn I messed up
@@nasa_astrohp1294Linguist?
90k per year ?
After "bukake"?
Nikko you wrong for that. 😂
Nikko you're the man
Every like this comment gets I do 5 pushups
Edit 1: the most likes I’ve ever gotten
He’s not doing the push-ups…
every like his comment gets he gets 5 boyfriends 💀
POOPY HEAD!!!
Cap
Ohh shiiii
I told my recruiter I smoked bud and she was actually chill about it and gave me a couple more weeks to clear my system before MEPS
Did you give her some gas?
Not my NCO story but my uncle is a veteran and he had a private who was trying to shoot a M-4, without a magazine, and when he was asked why he was trying to do it, he looked at it and asked my uncle why it wasn’t shooting. He did this, after basic training.
Everybody hatin on Air Force until you call in air support and watch the human fireworks
Dude totally cut out security forces being sent out on patrols lol
09:00 she dont need to turn her nose up, it looks like it's already up.
A niko a day keeps the depression away 🥲
Facts
68W here, I had a PFC buy his unlicensed wife a brand new car. She proceeded to hit a pedestrian and get arrested. He called me to ask if AER covers bail.
I enlisted for a free funeral. The 1st sergeant almost pissed himself when he heard me say that.
2:52 and go on LOL😂😂😂😂😂
Okay, did that knee crunch make anyone else feel physically ill? 😅🤢🤕
Also, the trick with the gloves and pockets was innovative af 👌🤌
That guys knee sounded just like a nurses back.
Dude that's literally Ms frickin America. Yeah she won lol
She’s also a 2nd Lt in the Air Force
Always a good day when Nikko posts. 😂
ALWAYSV
@@nikkoortizshorts thank you so much Nikko.
I had a nightmare last week, in the nightmare I was still in the army 😭
😂
That knee crunch, ouch😮
love coming home from school and seeing nikko posted! keep up the great work, im loving the new videos
End the work day and come to a new Nikko video and cold beer. Dude it's fckin Christmas 😂😂
Bro found the least dark Valkyrie Brynn meme.
hotboxing the barracks was peak basic training
I love your videos, when i get old enough im gonna join the military
Bro went from 20 to 40 real fast
6:25 ''ur life already sucks'' 😂
Navy dress uniform be looking like some fancy resturant waiter bro💀💀
The tank driver used natural camouflage or he trough he was a rabit 😂😂
@nikko. Sir you are so damn halarious and 110% accurate. Lol
The disrespect to PJ's is crazy haha
8:18 Damn, when I was in there were no reenlistment bonuses. So every 4 years I was like, "Do I really want to do this again even if I've got more chevrons on my sleeve?" Seriously, I questioned every reenlistment. It happened like 4 times. So then I was at 20, and I was like yeah that's enough. lol
bruh the one with the kid got me crying laughing bruh😭
Love the “the amazing digital circus” grenade memes
Not me watching this at nearly 4am cuz I can't sleep
Low key almost re-enlisted for that 30k bonus for 3 years😂😂😂
I love these vids they are hilarious keep it up Niko. Please make more JROTC content, as an e-2 NJROTC cadet I would love to see it please
They are honestly so funny 😂 which was your favourite? 😂
Nikko*
Bro the military should just give out hellcats as a sign on bonus
@5:55 This was at DLI xD mandatory fun days were basically just Army and Marines picking on the Navy and Air Force
love the content Nikko
So good 🫰
11:59 sounds like us at the city morgue concert before they came out and they played that song
just started. That tank in the opening, man.
British Army has my knee cartilage, 28 years later my knee makes epic crunching noises.🙄
*Bro NEVER STOP MILITARY FAILS OR TRAINING REACTIONS! The Jedi council Demands it!*
The chafing......God the chafing......that's some real ptsd along with slapping my boys cheeks
Love you Nikko
Heck yeah
I cannot wait to see him cry: Nikko Ortiz 2024
So funny 😂
That's crazy that the navy has better pilots then the air force lmao
Not really, Navy has to land on a moving ship in the ocean.
@@BrandonBrownOctaneOverdrive I don't think that you took what I said the right way. I was saying the navy has better pilots then the air force
I think he was just pointing out it isn't that crazy that navy has better pilots. Army, Navy, and Airforce all have pilots and they all receive the proper training to perform their MOS. There is bound to be pilots not in the chair force that are better. It's not like we train army and navy pilots less than air force@@travismorris5903
I re-enlisted for 4 years just to get my E5... I was about to get out and they were like "Hey.... would you stay if we gave you E5. No board no points just straight E5." I went for it and regretted it.
6:24 y she pause after the word coming
4:42 that is the lady from Air force that won Miss America 2024 :D FOR REAL!
5:36 I swear to God I know what dormitory that is just by looking at it, so much PTSD from that shit
I re-enlisted for 4 more years for a backpack lol
HAHAHA NIKKO PUT SOME LOTION ON YOUR NOSTRILS BRO
Brother, Navy at 75k for 6 right now. Ain't no shot unless bad medical comes up.
Don't hate on the whiskeys or the foxes, we get fawked up during JPMRC
The knee one sent me. Double replacement at 44.
Im not even kidding, my aunts dad from the other side was asked to return to combat 2 years before he passed. He was 66 with alzheimer's
At 4:40 that is the F16 so you now identify as one
I love how he said 6 years and only 30k while I’m over here not understanding why I signed 6 more for not even a penny more
The re-enlistment for my MOS was $68K, 6 years, almost everyone I know went for it and regretted it. So glad I didn’t fall for that.
Awesome video! You should do Canadian TikTok fails in the future!
Agreed!
Yes 🇨🇦
Do what I did. Don't tell anyone your ETS date is coming up. Let your contract expire and then start outprocessing lol.
0:13 before and after celebrities used druogs
As I told my hubs when he was trying to get hired as a CO at a prison "dont lie but don't offer up any info they cant find on their own/prove" 😂😂😂😂 the he proceeded to answer "yes" when they ask if he has had depression 😑 because at some point in his teens early 20s he was sad from time to time over things that were happening in his life. Never even went to see anybody about it 😂😂 he didn't get hired
You know that was a Spec4 that came up with the gloves to hide the hands in the pockets.
11:51 bro my brother is an infantryman man and he says that when it happens people barely get any sleep
Had a buddy get orders to go to a base near his home town, he leaves for a TDY and decides he’s going to wait until he gets back to work on the paperwork. He gets back from his TDY and starts filling out paperwork and gets an email saying he’s lost his orders. So he reaches out to our leadership, they tell him that if he *re-enlists* he’ll get his orders back (meaning he lost them due to retention) so he does so, re-ups for another 4, then the air force absolutely shafts him and sends him to Minot. He has multiple people at the base that he was close with (leadership wise) so he thought he’d be getting the LE side, well he got the nukes side and his wife left him due to him being gone so often.
My recruiter called me a carver for my old highschool cuts from my emo stage.