I was suffering for loneliness as a single woman in my 60's. Then I got a dog, Now I have met every person in my neighbourhood who has a dog. We meet at the park at specific times, daily for social time. We go for lunch and dinners, invite each other over to our homes for parties. We organize hiking trips, go to the movies, trade garden plants and recipes, share books etc. I feel like my dog saved me from a life of loneliness.
IMO, social media is like the fast food of human connection. Looks and feels like the real thing but it's totally devoid of all the stuff we actually need and is thus killing us slowly. Wife and I are in our late 30s and none of the similarly aged people who are slowly buying houses in our neighborhood have any interest in socializing. Most can barely even muster saying hello in passing.
Hi, I don't mean to be flippant but perhaps you could take the first step. Perhaps pop over one day with a small box of sweetmeats or something. I know it won't be easy but it may be better than waiting for someone else to take the first step. Perhaps you could include a card containing your name and phone number.
It important to actively seek to enhance your relationships and reach out to neighbors and make social connections. It’s like exercise-you have to make time for it for well being. Great show.
The sense of belonging comes in the small tenderness that are exchanged on a day to day bases. I watched a 4 year old and a ninety year old . Delt with loneness every day after their nap time he taught he card games from the book of Hoil then they were confident in the game at the next neighborhood pot luck . And mostly they won. But each found away to satisfy being lonely . I spit of the distance in a rural neighborhood.
The Surgeon General Murthy is a wonderful human being. Imagine if the whole world were to follow his lead in the exceptional ideas in his closing statement. What a wonderful world we would live in. Thank you Rich, an outstanding interview as usual.
As a child of the 60s and 70s television age, my parents made the decision to not have a tv in the house. It was awkward and hard, not watching the cartoons, sitcoms, etc., that my peers were watching. Instead, I made an art studio and a science lab in the basement. I made super 8 films, recruited classmates to be in them. I was a weird kid. But I was in the tactile, actual world, somewhat less influenced by advertising, peer pressure, mass culture. I am so grateful to my parents for letting me live IRL. Now more than ever, we need more parents who put in the effort to give their kids that experience.
This is lovely! Unfortunately these days foregoing a TV has little to no effect, since kids have access to multiple smaller screens on their phones, tablets, and computers. I'm not a parent yet but would love to be able to do things differently if given the opportunity.
@@ash9x9 Our entire living room is an art studio! We are in the local forest every weekend, watching the changes week. Folk dancing when we can fit it in. We do Rotary stuff. I belong to our local Makerspace, so I’m always tinkering and making things. What I do now is pretty much what I did as a kid, but with better supplies! Sure, I’m online. I do some screen time, and I am very selective about what I watch. And I’m always leaving my phone somewhere and not realising it for hours, because I pretty much only use it for apps I have to have for work (endlessly annoying!) and an occasional phone call.
I just watch this video and reading comments. Your comment is absolutely true. I am a Introvert keep in mind. Im 25 I was never the first pick at school nor in collage but when I was 21/22 I always thought I was just a lonely person (mainly due to the fact I moved out and was living in a different city than my family) I would have a lot of mental issues by just being out in the real world and having these new people in my life and not wanting to build a relationship with anyone. By the end of my 22 year going into 23 I realize that I was just alone in the city and was able to finally be myself with others and not feel like I was just a burden with others including with my work. I finally figured who I was and what I can be. My first words after waking up from the mental position I was in was “I’m not a lonely person, I’m just alone.” So being alone with yourself and not being lonely with yourself is the key to finally make your life easier to understand on who you are. I am finally happy with who I am after realizing I am living in the real world. I will maybe never be the first pick for someone but I will always pick myself first.
How beautiful is the Dr. Murthy's answer to the legacy he would like to leave! A nation connecting with it's core of love would bring a whole lot of good into the world and peace to each of us. How brilliant and brave for him to name the ailment that causes our suffering. I appreciate his pointing out that it's the character of policy makers that determine public policy (more or less, he said that, I think). This podcast was most refreshing. Thanks.
Being alone(not lonely) without avoiding people and being able to function and be happy(or content) is very important skill. I learned it when I first moved to European country and the US. Right now, I get much joy from meeting and chatting with neighbors, interacting with colleagues, shop assistants and sometimes having a deep conversation with friends and seeing my extended family, even if it happens once a year or once in 2 years(due to distance) Am I happy? I can say that I don’t feel lonely and feel connected to people. It is an active effort each of us should make to connect with people, to understand them and to care about what is going on around us
Such an important message. I feel like the pandemic and social media have had a profound effect on loneliness. I hope that we can make changes as a society to come back to what really matters, love.
Profound discussion. These are Buddhist values, spirituality minus organized religious structures. Thank you. I love to walk in my neighborhood and exchange a hello, a smile, a kind comment...with strangers and neighbors. I get a huge oxytocin rush and always feel more connected after simple, short human engagement. ❤
In this episode two lonely persons discuss loneliness to an audience of other lonely people. Brilliant insight. The issue is also safety. It is hard to invite a complete stranger to our home, but not so hard to share a picture of our place with a stranger. If we have a sense of being safe it is easier to connect.
This deserves way more views!!! What a great conversation. This surgeon general is a delight!!! He’s now my most favorite public servant. What a gentle soul. His voice is relaxing. He’s so thoughtful. I hope his initiatives are successful. We really need some major changes to pull us out of the tar pit we seem to be stuck in. You can’t tell me the entire trans issue all stems from social media and loneliness.
I’d love for you to interview surgeon general Joseph Ladapo and talk to him about the importance of trustworthiness particularly in relation to leaders of health.
Thank you, Rich, for getting Dr. Murthy on your podcast. 'Became a huge supporter of his work when I first heard him speak on other podcasts shortly after the release of his book in 2020. So, in a way, 'have waited more than three years for two of my favourite people engage in conversation about the subject of loneliness. In my opinion, it would be a much better world if someday individuals like Dr. Murthy are in hugely influential (not to say, he isn't currently in a position where his message will no doubt find an audience) positions like president of the U.S. For now, though, 'truly cherish him in whatever official or unofficial role he assumes. His gentleness, warmth, compassion, etc. are so refreshing in a both a collective world that is suffering and on a micro, individual basis.
It's wonderful to hear someone in such an important position be authentic, humane and loving. In a world with AI, disconnection and anger, it's so heart warming and hopeful to hear a calm, rational and caring conversation on a topic that is so important to the future of our world. Thank you to both Surgeon General Vivek Murthy and Rich Roll for their integrity and dedication to making this world a better place to live for all of us.
I just printed out the report he authored on the loneliness epidemic, so I’m incredibly excited to listen & learn more! Thanks for bringing this important conversation to the forefront.
Suburban development planning and building codes are a serious significant factor that literally builds-in loneliness and isolation. Planning Code is soooo hard to change despite knowing well the negative consequences of it. To make it a health issue could be a tipping point. Hope there can be a spotlight on the serious and well-documented science around the negative impact of encoded and insidious development patterns that only serve status-quo profit models.
Starting with Block Watches. A system designed out of fear and does nothing more than spew fear into communities on a regular basis. We were far better off without it.
So glad you said this. As a youth counselor I recognized childhood sheltering was an epidemic and we've destroyed the bedrock of childhood autonomy. Suburbanism is the driving force for this, the environment where it is the most extreme. It cripples kids and robs them of the real world. People learn that everywhere they walk and experience firsthand has been built and handed to them. They don't have real communities building and growing from the land around them. Each person lives in their corner of the Matrix, and uploads to whatever corner their extremely complex corporatized job is. When we start with each other face to face, in our real immediate environments, we are immediately autonomous to take action together without being controlled by random people in many layers of hierarchy, scattered across the world.
Profit is the key word there. The private profit maximization model is no longer fit for human needs, it goes against our very basic needs. We need a nationalized planned economy under workers' control.
Wow! I am hoping that this wonderful compassionate gentleman gets to continue spreading this message. I actually felt hope for our government. This was one of your best conversations Rich! 🙏
If American families, couples, friends, and neighbors would gather in their living rooms tonight and watch this chat with Vivek, take his message to heart, and start to live it-while steadfastly ignoring another Vivek (and his opponents) who are getting much more attention tonight-a spirit of national unity that we have forgotten we so badly crave would begin to spread across the land. The vision that Vivek Murthy inspiringly lays out reminds me of Martin Luther King Jr's vision of the Beloved Community. And can we distill the temperament-the kindness and thoughtfulness-of our Surgeon General and circulate it daily through the ducts in the halls of Congress?
This hit home for me. I found myself in the hospital having suffered a stroke. (I’ve since completely recovered thankfully.) I didn’t have anyone to help me. I couldn’t talk. It’s an experience I’ll never forget.
I went through my entire recovery alone. Since I’ve recovered, I’ve thought often about people who are like me are alone and I’ve thought I’d like to advocate for those who are alone and in need.
Great to see a high level public servant like him who is well spoken, logical, not divisive and seems to be a person we can trust. Not saying he’s perfect or someone I would agree with all the time. Hopefully some day we restore some level of public trust with our countries leaders.
Than you for an excellent conversation! So ecstatic to have such a brilliant AND compassionate Surgeon General. Wow! Thes is the say our government should work......I'm so tired of spoiled Republican creating problems that don't even exist. We need to work together!
As always Rich u have introduced us to another amazing Doctor who is profoundly making beautiful changes Surgeon General Vivek Murphy 🕊🙏🧘very grateful for ur human kindness 🤍🌹Rich Rolls very grateful for ur continuous amazing service U both inspire me to continue to shine 😊
Great conversation. Very insightful particularly about young people and the decline of in-person community. 😢 Looking forward to the follow-up episode. Thanks Vivek, Rich & Team. ❤
Social media's impact on people's mental health is an extremely serious one. As a parent of three children, now young adults, I felt exasperated and alone in trying to deal with its harmful effects. I felt powerless and it placed demands on the child-parent relationship that shouldn't exist. It is and was the most stressful part of parenting. It was relentless. I still worry about the effects that it's having on them. I too wondered why nobody was doing anything about it, why it all had to fall on the individual shoulders of the parents. I am very grateful to Dr Murthy for recognising this and committing to it's change, for if the US can lead the way on this, it will have positive impact for children and parents around the world. I think it will also send a message of validation to people of all ages who feel its harmful effects. May Dr Murthy act as a catalyst for change and may he get the support he needs.
I love all your podcasts + this one is no exception - SpectacularlySpecial to listen in on such a strong message of Love. Very relevant topics raised that need to be addressed in the western world. ThankYou. I appreciate.👍😜 Lizzi. xxx Melbourne, Australia.
for study on medical consequences of loneliness I highly recommend the book: A Cry Unheard: New Insights into the Medical Consequences of Loneliness by James J. Lynch it concentrates on the heart issues. It has lots of insights
Since when a text is anything close enough to real human contact? Who made us believe that and why did we agree to this? It’s totally our fault. The lack of communication with other and our inner self. And it’s our responsibility to fix that.
@Rich Roll please get Iain McGilchrist on, you'll have a much more profound conversation and actually get to the bottom of our neural/psychological/social/cultural/political issues, and therefore understand the way to the solutions
Loneliness is such a big issue for so many and especially our youth . It's even harder for neurodiverse youngsters and no one's talking about this. I tried to talk with the disabilities office at my son's college to start a support group for neurodiverse students during the pandemic ( an especially lonely time) and was met vey little enthusiasm. I was happy to see that the university had groups for many marginalized demographics within the school but nothing for neurodiverse students who are arguably struggling the most with loneliness. I'd like to the adults in institutions step up for these young people. Meeting people is harder than ever and they all wear head phones now so trying to make friends at the gym or even with neighbors in an apartment complex dominated by young residents is virtually impossible. You can't even say hi to someone absorbed in listening to their own entertainment as they move around the building or gym. Many young people struggle in his climate. Imagine how it must be for those whose brain wiring makes it challenging in the best of circumstances. I
I was just having a conversation with someone about the lack of interaction ("informal loose ties" per the Surgeon General). AI will create contactless and people-less experiences that used to require that you connect and interact with human beings. With less interaction with people, that is less interaction with people who are different from us as well. So not only will many AI-enabled capabilities exacerbate loneliness but it will also impact our ability to empathize and be open to different people.
Loneliness could be found with learning what exercises you like, and doing them a few times a week. Advantages are while your by self, you got time to rest, you are improving self, including your personality, and your natural strength to being on your own. It like taking a sleeping pill before going to sleep >>once getting into shape to relax with the exercises. {At least a month of first time practice to get the exercise(s) supportive. After that finishing faster, adding a few more minutes before finishing, or even having time for a marathon run, let yourself know the next few days are going to be rest days and go for it - maybe a half year into a exercise practice. )
I feel there was a lost opportunity to mention a plant-based diet for physical AND mental health as Dr. Murthy's vast influence on the most overweight country in the world could have a major impact on the cause.
As a 35F, I don't know where to meet good men. Is it at the gym? A bar? A dating app? It just feels like wherever I go men and women are super effected by the media, news, and society (politics, values etc). It's really hard
Be prepared to make the first move. Most men nowadays would rather stay single than approach a woman in public and risk catching a sexual harassment case.
It's so difficult talking to younger climbers at my local gym. It would be nice to collaborate and solve boulder problems. But, these youngsters often times appear awkward and often times not able to hold a conversation.
How can you 'believe' in technology? It's a thing, a tool. It's not a value or higher living principle. The lack of conscious understanding of what it is we look up to or place our trust in to lead us out of our mess. It's not the same thing that got us here.
What I want to know is why there is no compassion towards people getting mandated to take an experimental injection that was proven to not stop transmission and is extremely risky. Why are these encouraged for 6 month old babies and pregnant women! It makes no logical sense. What is really going on?? Is it going to take as long to get these injections off the market due to all the horrible AEs and fatal heart issues.
While I appreciate this conversation in its entirety, unlike some people I'd like to recommend this video to, I am retired with plenty of discretionary time. Podcasts of more than about 30 minutes are deemed too long by busy people I know would appreciate the content. I'd love for my niece, a school teacher and parent, to hear this, but it's unlikely she'll find time for the whole video. I could try to summarize, but that is a lot of effort on the chance one person will get it. Is there something else that could be done? What about links to short clips in the subheadings? I could see my niece sharing that with other parents and educators. Maybe they would have a catchy name that would create a swell of 10 or 15 minute highlight videos to share. Something between YT one-minute clips and 105 minutes. Don't misunderstand. I want the whole, amazing conversation. Thanks so much!
@@zenveg Yes. Thank you so much for responding. I was trying to suggest something a little pithier than a "short," but much less than an hour. I am always mindful to both be very selective with shares and to summarize in my text when I do, but when you have this much good content, that isn't enough, so I usually don't bother. In my world, family and friends think they're fine without reaching for greater awareness ... until they aren't. Maybe I just need to find new friends....🥰
Things that weren't discussed. Sure getting together in leagues and community groups etc. are wonderful ideas but they have become close to unaffordable to most people. Mixed communities were there were shops downstairs and walkups above have disappeared to be replaced by larger impersonal buildings where people aren't naturally interacting. We are bombarded continually with messaging that says fear others, fear strangers, the world is not safe and then people become survival centred and fearful. The more fearful the less people get out and interact and thus cycle then becomes, less activity leads to a further empowering of the survival response and even less impetus for someone to feel safe meeting others. Social connection can decrease health risks, but maybe this is because when you are not connecting then you are not getting out to do things with people, so you aren't as healthy because you are less active. There is such a push to researching the things that are right in front of our faces. We can research everything to death or understand that there are something we know in the core of our beings. Sure research but this whole idea that we need to wait for data to agree with what we know is keeping us from doing things when they need to be done. There is so much more, but basically this will get buried below more comments and is really me sharing within a void when I could go out and do my work of making sure people stay connected. I just want to know where this voice on loneliness was the last few years when everyone was being told to stay in and away from each other, when seniors were being isolated in sterile rooms and the idea that we should fear each other was being pounded into our beings.
Very good. Even where we live,NZ , my kids walked to and from school. They were the exception as many were fearful that something would’ happen.’ Most would drive the kids to school though they lived 10 minutes walk away.
To all thpose people who defend being alone, let ask you a question: How can you truely grow and develop as person if all you do is keep to yourself and avoid people? How can you truely learn from people?
As a introvert and someone that was had a mindset of i am lonely than I am alone and would never try to get a connection with other. When I was 21 I had that mindset and dealt with mental problems (anxiety and panic attacks probably 3 time a week) and just feeling like I was a burden in this world. I finally decided to reach out to a family member and give them a call or even like a text and just let them know what my mind was dealing with, once a week. I would tell myself everyday before I left to school or work “I am depressed. I don’t have depression. I am alone. I am not lonely” whether I woke up feeling good or bad. I lived alone in a different city away from my family after high school so I had no one to go back to. I lived in a studio with 4 white walls and as a broke student all I had was a bed, and a tv. I had empty walls with nothing on them. I was living in a empty room for years dealing with drug usages, mental problems and not having a person I can call without feeling a burden. I am now 25 living back with my family ( still living alone but now with walls filled with pictures and purpose) Even though, I now have that sense of safe connections. Back when I was 19-23 y/old I HAD to challenge myself to change my way of mind was set as so I can stop living just to make my days easier knowing ‘I didn’t want to have a connection with no one and be by myself’ to finally opening up to myself and others to see who I can be and who I am. It is dangerous life keeping to yourself and have that mindset of loneliness because there is a huge effect to you’re mental health. For me it was just an over night realization that I do want to live, I do want to see what my future can be, I do want to see what i can become. I’m 25 and my last relationship was when I was 20 so being able to truly find myself for 5 years of being alone help out a lot. I still struggle sometimes, I still sometimes have insecurities about myself as a person but, everyday I am still learning and finding about myself. True keys in my eyes to develop as a person and your mind on loneliness base on my experience (my first step was and still is finding God and building that love/trust relationship with him.) is step number one, finding that connection with yourself and building that love for yourself. Step two is find that safe connection you can talk to (it can be a friend, a family member or even a coworker who truly care about you) and talk to them about what is going on with your mental issues/problem. And last step is changing your mindset of being, ‘I am lonely, I have depression, I will never have anyone by my side’ to ‘I am alone, i am depressed, but I will be happy and I will fall in love being alone with myself.’ Till this day, I give thanks everyday I get to live another day and I get to love myself. My new saying as of now is “Today is a new day. Today is a new lesson. Today I GET to love myself.”
" If you are not happy and peaceful just by being with yourself .... Obviously you are in bad company! " - Sadhguru Never had a friend in my life, and probably iam the happiest person in the world..! So much so that people want to know my secret to my smile..! In our culture we train our minds to be happy anf peaceful within yourself.. So i tell people even if iam the last living person in the world i would still try to live as happy as i could considering the circumstances and ny struggle would have nothing to do with not able to talk to any other humanbeing! That would be the last thing on my mind.. 😄😄😄🙏🙏. There are two kinds of cars " push start car " & " self start car ".. Be a self start car..!! 😂😂😂😂😂 😂😂😂😂
Found it strange that the topic did not touch on how the forced isolation masking, shutting down churches with Covid, how immensely negatively impactful it was on mental health and domestic violence, and what he might do if we have a similar situation has the government learned that quarantines don’t work💁♂️
I think this is why teens do drugs. They are struggling to find a commonality with others and because there are so many different cultures mixed together, it is difficult for teens to find a connection. I think sports helps the ones who feel empowered by their athletic abilities but drugs allow people of all shapes and sizes something they can do together. Unfortunately, this is a false sense of connection and a type of superficiality that you realize when you start to find out that people are truly not your friend. So drugs are not a true connection but are a disconnect from yourself and others
Parents dont take responsibility and drive their children to hang out with friends. They make them stay at home playing video games & dont take care of them socially. My mom would not make effort to meet other parent's so I could hang out with the kids. I used computer and social media to avoid reality of my lonleiness as a kid.
@@sassysandie2865 So horrible. I remember when I looked out the window crying because I felt so lonley. I filled all those feelings with videogames where I could be playing with people that live in other country locations. Also I was a victim of a older online predator that effected me many years later. All of these things just because social media is not regulated nore did the parent take care of their child as they should.
Where was this expert when we were in the thick of analyzing the risks of covid lock downs? Lotta thick irony here to see a liberal and government health official discuss the large cost of human isolation, after years of government forced isolation under the pretense that no measure is too large to resist covid spread….while also denying the clear astronomically sized cons of such “mitigation” strategies on populations.
One of the isolating aspects is the concern about vaccinated people versus unvaccinated. There is a growing question as to whether there is something that vaccinated people are emitting that effects the unvaccinated and then of course the anger that some vaccinated people have against the unvaccinated and it’s only going to grow this election year.
I was suffering for loneliness as a single woman in my 60's. Then I got a dog, Now I have met every person in my neighbourhood who has a dog. We meet at the park at specific times, daily for social time. We go for lunch and dinners, invite each other over to our homes for parties. We organize hiking trips, go to the movies, trade garden plants and recipes, share books etc. I feel like my dog saved me from a life of loneliness.
It is no mystery why dog spelled backwards is God! Happy for you ♥️
Yep. I have made so many really interesting friends in my neighborhood because I got a dog.
How absolutely wonderful....delighted for you all....🎉❤🎉
I cured my loneliness ever since I started working at the animal shelter.
What a lovely, intelligent and understanding man. I am profoundly touched by his presence.
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller
IMO, social media is like the fast food of human connection. Looks and feels like the real thing but it's totally devoid of all the stuff we actually need and is thus killing us slowly. Wife and I are in our late 30s and none of the similarly aged people who are slowly buying houses in our neighborhood have any interest in socializing. Most can barely even muster saying hello in passing.
I have two neighbors my age. We don’t interact. I barely see them.
Hi, I don't mean to be flippant but perhaps you could take the first step. Perhaps pop over one day with a small box of sweetmeats or something. I know it won't be easy but it may be better than waiting for someone else to take the first step. Perhaps you could include a card containing your name and phone number.
It important to actively seek to enhance your relationships and reach out to neighbors and make social connections. It’s like exercise-you have to make time for it for well being. Great show.
The sense of belonging comes in the small tenderness that are exchanged on a day to day bases. I watched a 4 year old and a ninety year old . Delt with loneness every day after their nap time he taught he card games from the book of Hoil then they were confident in the game at the next neighborhood pot luck . And mostly they won. But each found away to satisfy being lonely . I spit of the distance in a rural neighborhood.
It def doesn’t look and feel like the real thing
The Surgeon General Murthy is a wonderful human being. Imagine if the whole world were to follow his lead in the exceptional ideas in his closing statement. What a wonderful world we would live in. Thank you Rich, an outstanding interview as usual.
As a child of the 60s and 70s television age, my parents made the decision to not have a tv in the house. It was awkward and hard, not watching the cartoons, sitcoms, etc., that my peers were watching. Instead, I made an art studio and a science lab in the basement. I made super 8 films, recruited classmates to be in them. I was a weird kid. But I was in the tactile, actual world, somewhat less influenced by advertising, peer pressure, mass culture. I am so grateful to my parents for letting me live IRL. Now more than ever, we need more parents who put in the effort to give their kids that experience.
This is lovely! Unfortunately these days foregoing a TV has little to no effect, since kids have access to multiple smaller screens on their phones, tablets, and computers. I'm not a parent yet but would love to be able to do things differently if given the opportunity.
and what do you do now..?
We would have been best friends!
@@ash9x9 Our entire living room is an art studio! We are in the local forest every weekend, watching the changes week. Folk dancing when we can fit it in. We do Rotary stuff. I belong to our local Makerspace, so I’m always tinkering and making things. What I do now is pretty much what I did as a kid, but with better supplies! Sure, I’m online. I do some screen time, and I am very selective about what I watch. And I’m always leaving my phone somewhere and not realising it for hours, because I pretty much only use it for apps I have to have for work (endlessly annoying!) and an occasional phone call.
@@LisaSonora ❤️👋❤️
Extraordinary guest Rich - we need leaders like this compassionate man, who can set a kinder course. Thanks...
Being with yourself not by yourself is the key to being alone and not being lonely
I just watch this video and reading comments. Your comment is absolutely true. I am a Introvert keep in mind. Im 25 I was never the first pick at school nor in collage but when I was 21/22 I always thought I was just a lonely person (mainly due to the fact I moved out and was living in a different city than my family) I would have a lot of mental issues by just being out in the real world and having these new people in my life and not wanting to build a relationship with anyone. By the end of my 22 year going into 23 I realize that I was just alone in the city and was able to finally be myself with others and not feel like I was just a burden with others including with my work. I finally figured who I was and what I can be. My first words after waking up from the mental position I was in was “I’m not a lonely person, I’m just alone.”
So being alone with yourself and not being lonely with yourself is the key to finally make your life easier to understand on who you are.
I am finally happy with who I am after realizing I am living in the real world. I will maybe never be the first pick for someone but I will always pick myself first.
How beautiful is the Dr. Murthy's answer to the legacy he would like to leave! A nation connecting with it's core of love would bring a whole lot of good into the world and peace to each of us. How brilliant and brave for him to name the ailment that causes our suffering. I appreciate his pointing out that it's the character of policy makers that determine public policy (more or less, he said that, I think). This podcast was most refreshing. Thanks.
Damn, I actually shed tears listening to this and their descriptions of how loneliness presents. That's a first.
I’m deeply touched by the work that Rich Roll & team does! Thank you for having this Surgeon General at this time. His work is astounding!❤️
“The Ask is Not Small
Because
The Need is Great”
Being alone(not lonely) without avoiding people and being able to function and be happy(or content) is very important skill. I learned it when I first moved to European country and the US. Right now, I get much joy from meeting and chatting with neighbors, interacting with colleagues, shop assistants and sometimes having a deep conversation with friends and seeing my extended family, even if it happens once a year or once in 2 years(due to distance) Am I happy? I can say that I don’t feel lonely and feel connected to people. It is an active effort each of us should make to connect with people, to understand them and to care about what is going on around us
Such an important message. I feel like the pandemic and social media have had a profound effect on loneliness. I hope that we can make changes as a society to come back to what really matters, love.
Profound discussion. These are Buddhist values, spirituality minus organized religious structures. Thank you. I love to walk in my neighborhood and exchange a hello, a smile, a kind comment...with strangers and neighbors. I get a huge oxytocin rush and always feel more connected after simple, short human engagement. ❤
I personally find the Tao De Ching to be the most enlightening book ever written.
It's largely what Buddhism was based on
This SG is so approachable and thoughtful in his manner, this is refreshing.
It's a trip how this U.S Surgeon General Murthy has served under two completely opposing cabinets in The White House. What a heck of a career.
lo you think the two cabinets were completely opposing, that's the trip.
Adam… don’t feed the conspiracy theorists.
Two opposing cabinets? What do you mean?
In this episode two lonely persons discuss loneliness to an audience of other lonely people.
Brilliant insight. The issue is also safety. It is hard to invite a complete stranger to our home, but not so hard to share a picture of our place with a stranger.
If we have a sense of being safe it is easier to connect.
This deserves way more views!!! What a great conversation. This surgeon general is a delight!!! He’s now my most favorite public servant. What a gentle soul. His voice is relaxing. He’s so thoughtful. I hope his initiatives are successful. We really need some major changes to pull us out of the tar pit we seem to be stuck in. You can’t tell me the entire trans issue all stems from social media and loneliness.
I’d love for you to interview surgeon general Joseph Ladapo and talk to him about the importance of trustworthiness particularly in relation to leaders of health.
Coach Dusty Bindgrif wrote a book on this exact topic.
THIS is one of the most powerful, meaningful, and impactful interviews I have listened to in years. Thank you gentlemen. ❤
Thank you, Rich, for getting Dr. Murthy on your podcast. 'Became a huge supporter of his work when I first heard him speak on other podcasts shortly after the release of his book in 2020. So, in a way, 'have waited more than three years for two of my favourite people engage in conversation about the subject of loneliness. In my opinion, it would be a much better world if someday individuals like Dr. Murthy are in hugely influential (not to say, he isn't currently in a position where his message will no doubt find an audience) positions like president of the U.S. For now, though, 'truly cherish him in whatever official or unofficial role he assumes. His gentleness, warmth, compassion, etc. are so refreshing in a both a collective world that is suffering and on a micro, individual basis.
It's wonderful to hear someone in such an important position be authentic, humane and loving. In a world with AI, disconnection and anger, it's so heart warming and hopeful to hear a calm, rational and caring conversation on a topic that is so important to the future of our world. Thank you to both Surgeon General Vivek Murthy and Rich Roll for their integrity and dedication to making this world a better place to live for all of us.
I just printed out the report he authored on the loneliness epidemic, so I’m incredibly excited to listen & learn more! Thanks for bringing this important conversation to the forefront.
Love the closer table 👏🥰
I wish I could have heard this when I was struggling and misunderstood by everyone during my stay in chicago.
Suburban development planning and building codes are a serious significant factor that literally builds-in loneliness and isolation. Planning Code is soooo hard to change despite knowing well the negative consequences of it. To make it a health issue could be a tipping point. Hope there can be a spotlight on the serious and well-documented science around the negative impact of encoded and insidious development patterns that only serve status-quo profit models.
Good point
Starting with Block Watches. A system designed out of fear and does nothing more than spew fear into communities on a regular basis. We were far better off without it.
So glad you said this. As a youth counselor I recognized childhood sheltering was an epidemic and we've destroyed the bedrock of childhood autonomy. Suburbanism is the driving force for this, the environment where it is the most extreme. It cripples kids and robs them of the real world.
People learn that everywhere they walk and experience firsthand has been built and handed to them. They don't have real communities building and growing from the land around them. Each person lives in their corner of the Matrix, and uploads to whatever corner their extremely complex corporatized job is. When we start with each other face to face, in our real immediate environments, we are immediately autonomous to take action together without being controlled by random people in many layers of hierarchy, scattered across the world.
Profit is the key word there. The private profit maximization model is no longer fit for human needs, it goes against our very basic needs. We need a nationalized planned economy under workers' control.
Wow, thank you for having him in your show and the beautiful important conversation that I will share with many ❤
Wow! I am hoping that this wonderful compassionate gentleman gets to continue spreading this message. I actually felt hope for our government. This was one of your best conversations Rich! 🙏
💯
If American families, couples, friends, and neighbors would gather in their living rooms tonight and watch this chat with Vivek, take his message to heart, and start to live it-while steadfastly ignoring another Vivek (and his opponents) who are getting much more attention tonight-a spirit of national unity that we have forgotten we so badly crave would begin to spread across the land. The vision that Vivek Murthy inspiringly lays out reminds me of Martin Luther King Jr's vision of the Beloved Community.
And can we distill the temperament-the kindness and thoughtfulness-of our Surgeon General and circulate it daily through the ducts in the halls of Congress?
This hit home for me. I found myself in the hospital having suffered a stroke. (I’ve since completely recovered thankfully.) I didn’t have anyone to help me. I couldn’t talk. It’s an experience I’ll never forget.
I went through my entire recovery alone. Since I’ve recovered, I’ve thought often about people who are like me are alone and I’ve thought I’d like to advocate for those who are alone and in need.
I’m sorry you had to go through that, but glad you recovered. You sound like a very thoughtful and caring person
I’m just blown away from learning what some people experience. God bless you!
No one should be alone. I’m so sorry this happened to you.
Thanks for this excellent interview!! Rich, you are the best host......always such skilled inquiries and comments with your guests!!
what a beautiful message. You both bring so much hope to a very sick and chaotic system. Very deep. Much love. 💗
Great to see a high level public servant like him who is well
spoken, logical, not divisive and seems to be a person we can trust. Not saying he’s perfect or someone I would agree with all the time. Hopefully some day we restore some level of public trust with our countries leaders.
Thank you for presenting this important subject, so many take aways from this
Very well said! I love this video.
Thank you, Dr. Murthy and thank you to Rich for hosting him and his important message.
Thank you both. Great discussion. How about let's all do what Dr Murthy advocates
Really seems like a heart centered leader. I loved his response to Rich's final question.
Thank you so much Rich & Mr Murthy for a deep nuanced & very needed conversation!
Than you for an excellent conversation! So ecstatic to have such a brilliant AND compassionate Surgeon General. Wow! Thes is the say our government should work......I'm so tired of spoiled Republican creating problems that don't even exist. We need to work together!
As always Rich u have introduced us to another amazing Doctor who is profoundly making beautiful changes
Surgeon General Vivek Murphy 🕊🙏🧘very grateful for ur human kindness 🤍🌹Rich Rolls very grateful for ur continuous amazing service
U both inspire me to continue to shine 😊
Great conversation. Very insightful particularly about young people and the decline of in-person community. 😢 Looking forward to the follow-up episode. Thanks Vivek, Rich & Team. ❤
What a delightful human and public servant! thank you!
You are a very good TH-camr, I love your videos.❤
Thank you Rich for touching this topic.
You got a new table!
Great podcast! 👍
Social media's impact on people's mental health is an extremely serious one. As a parent of three children, now young adults, I felt exasperated and alone in trying to deal with its harmful effects. I felt powerless and it placed demands on the child-parent relationship that shouldn't exist. It is and was the most stressful part of parenting. It was relentless. I still worry about the effects that it's having on them. I too wondered why nobody was doing anything about it, why it all had to fall on the individual shoulders of the parents. I am very grateful to Dr Murthy for recognising this and committing to it's change, for if the US can lead the way on this, it will have positive impact for children and parents around the world. I think it will also send a message of validation to people of all ages who feel its harmful effects. May Dr Murthy act as a catalyst for change and may he get the support he needs.
teary eyed, at the end, of both gentle men ending their time together
This is an incredibly thoughtful,intelligent and hopeful interview. Well done.
Rich's intro is back! Thank you!
BEAUTIFUL HEART WORK!
I love all your podcasts + this one is no exception - SpectacularlySpecial to listen in on such a strong message of Love.
Very relevant topics raised that need to be addressed in the western world.
ThankYou.
I appreciate.👍😜
Lizzi. xxx
Melbourne, Australia.
Ah to hear the Rich Rollian philosophy point blank. Rich Roll for president. 💪🏻🌱🙏
The powers that be($$$) dont want people to be unified. They can isolate the workforce and use them as chattle for a minimum wage
Agreed. An atomised society is easier to manipulate/control/abuse.
It's not necessarily a conscious effort but definitely the drive for maximizing profits tends to lead to a more and more atomized society.
for study on medical consequences of loneliness I highly recommend the book: A Cry Unheard: New Insights into the Medical Consequences of Loneliness by James J. Lynch
it concentrates on the heart issues. It has lots of insights
Social media was created to increase connections yet it also increases isolation. Why meet someone when you can send a text?
Since when a text is anything close enough to real human contact? Who made us believe that and why did we agree to this? It’s totally our fault. The lack of communication with other and our inner self. And it’s our responsibility to fix that.
Thank you for sharing your personal experiences.
His book was so amazing!
@Rich Roll please get Iain McGilchrist on, you'll have a much more profound conversation and actually get to the bottom of our neural/psychological/social/cultural/political issues, and therefore understand the way to the solutions
Fully enjoyed this conversation and appreciate his candid remarks
Beautifully shared discussion.
Most grateful.
💜
Nothing short of Excellent!!!!!
Loneliness is such a big issue for so many and especially our youth . It's even harder for neurodiverse youngsters and no one's talking about this. I tried to talk with the disabilities office at my son's college to start a support group for neurodiverse students during the pandemic ( an especially lonely time) and was met vey little enthusiasm. I was happy to see that the university had groups for many marginalized demographics within the school but nothing for neurodiverse students who are arguably struggling the most with loneliness. I'd like to the adults in institutions step up for these young people.
Meeting people is harder than ever and they all wear head phones now so trying to make friends at the gym or even with neighbors in an apartment complex dominated by young residents is virtually impossible. You can't even say hi to someone absorbed in listening to their own entertainment as they move around the building or gym. Many young people struggle in his climate. Imagine how it must be for those whose brain wiring makes it challenging in the best of circumstances.
I
I was just having a conversation with someone about the lack of interaction ("informal loose ties" per the Surgeon General). AI will create contactless and people-less experiences that used to require that you connect and interact with human beings. With less interaction with people, that is less interaction with people who are different from us as well. So not only will many AI-enabled capabilities exacerbate loneliness but it will also impact our ability to empathize and be open to different people.
Wow. Amazing catch? 1st video I've watched from this channel! 1stie
Loneliness could be found with learning what exercises you like, and doing them a few times a week.
Advantages are while your by self, you got time to rest, you are improving self, including your personality, and your natural strength to being on your own.
It like taking a sleeping pill before going to sleep >>once getting into shape to relax with the exercises. {At least a month of first time practice to get the exercise(s) supportive. After that finishing faster, adding a few more minutes before finishing, or even having time for a marathon run, let yourself know the next few days are going to be rest days and go for it - maybe a half year into a exercise practice. )
Yo Rich, your beard looks amazing!
I feel there was a lost opportunity to mention a plant-based diet for physical AND mental health as Dr. Murthy's vast influence on the most overweight country in the world could have a major impact on the cause.
As a 35F, I don't know where to meet good men. Is it at the gym? A bar? A dating app? It just feels like wherever I go men and women are super effected by the media, news, and society (politics, values etc). It's really hard
Be prepared to make the first move. Most men nowadays would rather stay single than approach a woman in public and risk catching a sexual harassment case.
@@Mist3rEM it's so sad this is the case, but you're not wrong. :(
It's hard to trust.
It's so difficult talking to younger climbers at my local gym. It would be nice to collaborate and solve boulder problems. But, these youngsters often times appear awkward and often times not able to hold a conversation.
How can you 'believe' in technology? It's a thing, a tool. It's not a value or higher living principle. The lack of conscious understanding of what it is we look up to or place our trust in to lead us out of our mess. It's not the same thing that got us here.
Great conversation
Beautiful interview
What I want to know is why there is no compassion towards people getting mandated to take an experimental injection that was proven to not stop transmission and is extremely risky. Why are these encouraged for 6 month old babies and pregnant women! It makes no logical sense. What is really going on??
Is it going to take as long to get these injections off the market due to all the horrible AEs and fatal heart issues.
While I appreciate this conversation in its entirety, unlike some people I'd like to recommend this video to, I am retired with plenty of discretionary time.
Podcasts of more than about 30 minutes are deemed too long by busy people I know would appreciate the content. I'd love for my niece, a school teacher and parent, to hear this, but it's unlikely she'll find time for the whole video.
I could try to summarize, but that is a lot of effort on the chance one person will get it.
Is there something else that could be done? What about links to short clips in the subheadings? I could see my niece sharing that with other parents and educators.
Maybe they would have a catchy name that would create a swell of 10 or 15 minute highlight videos to share. Something between YT one-minute clips and 105 minutes.
Don't misunderstand. I want the whole, amazing conversation. Thanks so much!
Rich always posts Shorts from the interviews and there's an index to jump to subjects of more interest. Look at the timeline.
@@zenveg Yes. Thank you so much for responding. I was trying to suggest something a little pithier than a "short," but much less than an hour. I am always mindful to both be very selective with shares and to summarize in my text when I do, but when you have this much good content, that isn't enough, so I usually don't bother.
In my world, family and friends think they're fine without reaching for greater awareness ... until they aren't. Maybe I just need to find new friends....🥰
The hhs asked why I was visiting their page. I just said "rich roll and us surgeon General podcast"
Oh no I'm gonna die early
Things that weren't discussed. Sure getting together in leagues and community groups etc. are wonderful ideas but they have become close to unaffordable to most people.
Mixed communities were there were shops downstairs and walkups above have disappeared to be replaced by larger impersonal buildings where people aren't naturally interacting.
We are bombarded continually with messaging that says fear others, fear strangers, the world is not safe and then people become survival centred and fearful.
The more fearful the less people get out and interact and thus cycle then becomes, less activity leads to a further empowering of the survival response and even less impetus for someone to feel safe meeting others.
Social connection can decrease health risks, but maybe this is because when you are not connecting then you are not getting out to do things with people, so you aren't as healthy because you are less active.
There is such a push to researching the things that are right in front of our faces. We can research everything to death or understand that there are something we know in the core of our beings. Sure research but this whole idea that we need to wait for data to agree with what we know is keeping us from doing things when they need to be done.
There is so much more, but basically this will get buried below more comments and is really me sharing within a void when I could go out and do my work of making sure people stay connected.
I just want to know where this voice on loneliness was the last few years when everyone was being told to stay in and away from each other, when seniors were being isolated in sterile rooms and the idea that we should fear each other was being pounded into our beings.
Very good. Even where we live,NZ , my kids walked to and from school. They were the exception as many were fearful that something would’ happen.’
Most would drive the kids to school though they lived 10 minutes walk away.
To all thpose people who defend being alone, let ask you a question: How can you truely grow and develop as person if all you do is keep to yourself and avoid people? How can you truely learn from people?
As a introvert and someone that was had a mindset of i am lonely than I am alone and would never try to get a connection with other. When I was 21 I had that mindset and dealt with mental problems (anxiety and panic attacks probably 3 time a week) and just feeling like I was a burden in this world. I finally decided to reach out to a family member and give them a call or even like a text and just let them know what my mind was dealing with, once a week. I would tell myself everyday before I left to school or work “I am depressed. I don’t have depression. I am alone. I am not lonely” whether I woke up feeling good or bad.
I lived alone in a different city away from my family after high school so I had no one to go back to. I lived in a studio with 4 white walls and as a broke student all I had was a bed, and a tv. I had empty walls with nothing on them. I was living in a empty room for years dealing with drug usages, mental problems and not having a person I can call without feeling a burden. I am now 25 living back with my family ( still living alone but now with walls filled with pictures and purpose) Even though, I now have that sense of safe connections. Back when I was 19-23 y/old I HAD to challenge myself to change my way of mind was set as so I can stop living just to make my days easier knowing ‘I didn’t want to have a connection with no one and be by myself’ to finally opening up to myself and others to see who I can be and who I am. It is dangerous life keeping to yourself and have that mindset of loneliness because there is a huge effect to you’re mental health.
For me it was just an over night realization that I do want to live, I do want to see what my future can be, I do want to see what i can become. I’m 25 and my last relationship was when I was 20 so being able to truly find myself for 5 years of being alone help out a lot. I still struggle sometimes, I still sometimes have insecurities about myself as a person but, everyday I am still learning and finding about myself.
True keys in my eyes to develop as a person and your mind on loneliness base on my experience (my first step was and still is finding God and building that love/trust relationship with him.) is step number one, finding that connection with yourself and building that love for yourself. Step two is find that safe connection you can talk to (it can be a friend, a family member or even a coworker who truly care about you) and talk to them about what is going on with your mental issues/problem. And last step is changing your mindset of being, ‘I am lonely, I have depression, I will never have anyone by my side’ to ‘I am alone, i am depressed, but I will be happy and I will fall in love being alone with myself.’
Till this day, I give thanks everyday I get to live another day and I get to love myself. My new saying as of now is “Today is a new day. Today is a new lesson. Today I GET to love myself.”
" If you are not happy and peaceful just by being with yourself ....
Obviously you are in bad company! "
- Sadhguru
Never had a friend in my life, and probably iam the happiest person in the world..! So much so that people want to know my secret to my smile..!
In our culture we train our minds to be happy anf peaceful within yourself..
So i tell people even if iam the last living person in the world i would still try to live as happy as i could considering the circumstances and ny struggle would have nothing to do with not able to talk to any other humanbeing!
That would be the last thing on my mind.. 😄😄😄🙏🙏.
There are two kinds of cars
" push start car " & " self start car "..
Be a self start car..!!
😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
I would vote for Vivek for President, regardless of party affiliation.
Imagine how much of information he holds in his head on surgery.
This guy needs to run for president, third party.
Curious to know where geographically they’re located and
Obviously well taught and talented people
As immigrant I faced this badly.
WHO bought their kids their phones, lap tops, tablets, computers and pay for their internet ??? YOU !
Exactly!
Yeah. Myself. Also
Found it strange that the topic did not touch on how the forced isolation masking, shutting down churches with Covid, how immensely negatively impactful it was on mental health and domestic violence, and what he might do if we have a similar situation has the government learned that quarantines don’t work💁♂️
I think this is why teens do drugs. They are struggling to find a commonality with others and because there are so many different cultures mixed together, it is difficult for teens to find a connection. I think sports helps the ones who feel empowered by their athletic abilities but drugs allow people of all shapes and sizes something they can do together. Unfortunately, this is a false sense of connection and a type of superficiality that you realize when you start to find out that people are truly not your friend. So drugs are not a true connection but are a disconnect from yourself and others
Loneliness hurts
what if you're alone and completely fine with it and you're always keeping yourself busy so you don't feel lonely? is this still bad?
Parents dont take responsibility and drive their children to hang out with friends. They make them stay at home playing video games & dont take care of them socially. My mom would not make effort to meet other parent's so I could hang out with the kids.
I used computer and social media to avoid reality of my lonleiness as a kid.
In the 60’s my mom didn’t want to take me anywhere so I watched TV or played records alone in my room.
@@sassysandie2865 So horrible. I remember when I looked out the window crying because I felt so lonley. I filled all those feelings with videogames where I could be playing with people that live in other country locations. Also I was a victim of a older online predator that effected me many years later.
All of these things just because social media is not regulated nore did the parent take care of their child as they should.
@@GuidetteExpert I’m so sorry😢l
@@sassysandie2865 You too
@@GuidetteExpert 😘
Please help the cause against loneliness
Excellent
Where was this expert when we were in the thick of analyzing the risks of covid lock downs? Lotta thick irony here to see a liberal and government health official discuss the large cost of human isolation, after years of government forced isolation under the pretense that no measure is too large to resist covid spread….while also denying the clear astronomically sized cons of such “mitigation” strategies on populations.
Exactly. I applaud.
The world is not the same after two years of fear mongering and forcefully keeping people inside.
One of the isolating aspects is the concern about vaccinated people versus unvaccinated. There is a growing question as to whether there is something that vaccinated people are emitting that effects the unvaccinated and then of course the anger that some vaccinated people have against the unvaccinated and it’s only going to grow this election year.
Thanx