Ex-JW: "I'm angry that time was stolen from me"
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.ย. 2024
- (Voicemail no. 140) Having recently disassociated from Jehovah's Witnesses, Max feels overwhelmed by feelings of anger at the years he wasted believing a lie.
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Yes anger is natural after you leave the cult. I was raised in it from birth and my anger was about the childhood things I missed out on, birthdays, holidays, extra curricular school activities, fitting in with my peers. I tried making up for the birthdays and holidays by immersing myself into making and buying holiday decorations, baking all kinds of goodies, buying presents for co-workers. It was fun and did help but what hurts is that I'll never get back my school days. I feel sorry for the child in me but I am grateful that I woke up while I was still young and have made many wonderful memories since leaving.
This comment made me feel very comforted and seen ❤️
My exact situation, glad we’re not alone ❤
@@kindforge I'm glad ❤
@@genazerep2370 Me too ❤
I'm upset that they wouldn't let me play sports nor advance my musical talents. They forced me to get baptized in 1975 at 12 years old! Been disfellowshiped 2 times and reproved 1 time!
And THIS is why at 45 years old I'm STILL bitter.
In 1996 as a senior in High School i gave up numerous scholarship offers from Universities in the US for football.
I spent my 20's being a witness. I left in 2011.
But the WHAT IF and thoughts of how I could have spent those years and choices I would have made are HARD to get over.
I am married. Have a house and feel I made a decent life out of it all...but I have always felt 10-15 years behind where I should be in life.
For me, it hits every time I go to my daughters’ ballet class, a tennis match, or any sort of sport or art event. I could have taken my time as an adolescent to build my skills, learn new instruments, etc, but I wasted so much time afraid of everyone and everything. It reminds me that I was right to leave, because honestly, what healthy community leads their members to live the way we did, and try my best to live out those things I missed. I play tennis with my kids often, and I dance with my friends. It’s not the same, but in some ways, I appreciate it more, and don’t take things for granted.
I’d rather be an angry ex JW than an unhappy current one.
At least now you’re free to BE angry.
Well said.
Max, if you’re reading this, please never allow other people to tell you HOW you’re supposed to feel. That’s YOURS to have. YOUR emotions are right on. And yes, anger is justified. It is. There are some folks that say it isn’t. It is. Now, what Lloyd said is so powerful and so truthful. The mental health is huge and healing ourselves. Please I’m praying for you as I watched this video and as I type this message. Please seek counsel in whatever capacity you feel safe to share. The forgiveness comes and the anger does leave. But there is no rushing or invalidating or shaming anyone who has rough emotions dealing with this abusive cult. And yes it is. Lloyd if you are reading this, perhaps you already know that you and your team are saving lives. I’m so stinking proud of you and I’ve never met you, but I’m so proud of what you do to educate people and simultaneously never judging or forcing your opinions. Truly a gift. I prayed for you and your family. Great blessings
Yeah I'm sure if God is real he wouldn't need a cult to give him praise, that's just my opinion. Everything done on Lloyd's part is well thought out and easy to listen to, and hopefully max gets what he wants in life, he's one of many lost souls shunned by the cult. I'm next to be shunned, just don't know when yet.
@@philipg9614 they do a great job at using that fear tactic. Just know this: there are more on the outside who will love and respect and honor and befriend you. Healing ❤️🩹 come your way and your family. I believe God is opening the floodgates to release the prisoners from this cult. You and those being released are answers to so many tears and prayers over the years from my life. God is with you and for you. Leave. Be free. Enjoy
@@gratefultobehere Yeah I just can't afford to rush without getting any job, mediocre or not, because I have no friends who will support me outside of the religion, I can talk to them online, and funny enough my online friends were more real to me than the ones in person at the JW meetings, no wonder they hate for you to associate with the outside world, because the outside world doesn't have to act perfect. I just want to say thanks, this makes things easier for the moment of coping.
@@philipg9614 you nailed it. You’re instincts are correct. May God provide a fabulous way of income for your life. You’ll know when to take your leap. And do it. You can 💪
@@gratefultobehere yeah, you are right, Lloyd’s Chanel also helps me fear of obedient to JW and help we got out of that cult last month. I’m free now.
As long as we are living....
We are able to move forward...
Don't let the organization hold us back anymore
Time was stolen from all of us and we all have frustrations for so many years wasted, especially if we were raised in this cult and spent decades in serving the WT. At least Max got out while he’s young. BTW Lloyd, looking sharp in your new digs. I already like it better than the bunker. 😀
Yeah - getting angry is what happens at first but then you deal with it and move on. I want a real childhood those dam GB hillbillies took from me. But you can't get it back only make sure they don't get any more of it.
Yep, my entire childhood wearing suits, neck ties, nylon socks, & dress shoes. No association with worldly children etc. etc. Anger has faded to hate!
I’m right there with you!
1000000000%
So relatable. The grief and anger were overwhelming when I first DA’d. I left at 19, and while some might see that as getting out early, I still felt all consuming rage and despair over the loss of my childhood and teens.
I’ve been out for 31 years now and the anger is still there. I’ve learned to live with my losses. But I’ll never stop hating the org for what it took from me.
Alison condivito appieno i tuoi sentimenti verso questa setta che hanno rovinato tutta la vita di privazioni inutili dividendo le famiglie con manipolazioni mentale facendo credere chi SA che cosa è chiedendo obbedienza assoluta e RUBA la vita di generazioni intere, anchio denuncero fino alla morte questa organizzazione, non slo su regole assurde ,ma anche gli investimenti con societa del mondo la pedofilia la loro associazione con l'ONU, adesso sono associati a L'OSCE un organo politico Europeo, per salvare molti a non entrare nei tg ,da L'ITALIA SALUTI E BUONA VITA A TUTTI SECONDO I VOSTRI DESIDERI.
Bro literally same as me. I'm 24 now and although I'm in a very good situation now, I have so much anger inside me that at times I've literally shaken with rage. I've been putting it all into music cause that's my escape but I feel kinda bad projecting anger at people even if it is justified. Dating has been nothing short of a nightmare, especially in today's landscape. I fell into a deep depression for the first 3 years I was out but that sadness turned into rage eventually. Now I've found acceptance of my feelings and it's getting better but my inner child comes at me sideways every so often. I've had the thousand yard stare confronting myself more times than I can count and it's genuinely terrifying but I'm figuring it out as best I can. Hope all is well for you and I hope you find some peace friend.
It's not just the time that is stolen. The potential, the dreams, and all that could have been fulfilled without the organization. It's just for us to feel like you were robbed/depleted of something that you are told was either unimportant or non-biblical and realize that it was not so. Because of the trust that was put there, you were hurt by it. And what you can do now that you know that you have the time to do as you wish, realize there is time for us to be okay with ourselves for the mistakes that we have made, and that we were able to benefit from them. I struggle with this for many reasons, but when I do take it to heart, I'm better than who I was before. And that's tough enough, but that's good enough.
Insightful and well presented, as usual. It's especially nice that you acknowledge his justifiable pain; we've all felt it. Well done, mate.
Hey Great Dayne! I’ve missed you there for a long minute. I hope all is well
Yes, so easy to get angry and totally relatable. identify the source of anger, deceit, time , relationships etc and work through this. gain back control of your feelings. Times a healer but the mind doesn’t forget xx
Well said.
Much as I hate to quote (of all people) an EVANGELIST, there's one from Robert "Hour of Power" Schuller worth remembering: "Don't mourn over what you've lost, rejoice at what you have left!" I'm 68, more than 40 years out, and with a lot of "left" yet to enjoy!
I woke up a year ago and still feel resentment and anger towards this cult. There are times where I feel depressed on the things I’ve missed out on socially throughout my childhood and early 20s, but my goal now is to move forward with my life. To be honest, it’s really hard to put aside what we’ve been doing our entire lives “preaching.” However, I’m trying the best I can to stay positive and make better memories for me to look back on. Thank you Max for leaving your voice message and Lloyd for addressing this common issue.
Max, please know you aren't alone. Our anger is justifiable. Go ahead and feel it. Cry. Find a punching bag. Work out. Find someone you trust who will let you vent everything. Keep talking about it until you don't want to talk about it anymore. After wasting almost 40 years to this, I have woken up and faded to pomo within the last year. Unfortunately my spouse and children are still heavily indoctrinated, so now it feels like a broken family because I can't conscientiously go along with the program anymore. They view me as separate from them in almost all respects. Also my parents, in-laws, and lifelong friends... avoiding me like the plague, and why? Because I had the motivation and backbone to do the research and finally prove this religion to be "a snare and a racket" only it's worse than most religions because it does this to families. It's morally and ethically wrong to treat people like this because they choose to think for themselves. It's impossible to forget and completely "move on" because the programming is now part of your past, and made you who you are today. But like Lloyd said, you can change your focus and direct your life to be meaningful and joyful. The good news is now YOU are in charge of your life and you can do whatever you want. Make a list of what you want to do now and work in that direction... forward, not looking back. There are a lot of books, YT channels, IG accounts, sub-Reddits, twitter, etc. that have helped me see there are thousands like us, in unique situations but united in struggling to overcome the programming we were handed as children. Therapy is probably your best resource, but if you can't afford it there's a lot of free advice. One resource that has helped me mentally and emotionally is The Holistic Psychologist (Instagram). She offers free advice that has dramatically helped me reprogram my thinking and outlook. I wish you all the best Max, and thank you Lloyd for your support to this community.
I also feel I was cheated Max! I was told not to try to become anything in life. Because the end was gonna come. I feel I might have went to college or made better choices if I had not felt doomed from the get go. All I can say is....just go forward . I'm not angry but I wish I had been more aggressive on the things I wanted to do. I just did not want to upset my parents. Your anger is justified but don't let them consume anymore of your thoughts.
I'm still pissed about 40+ years stolen from me! Finally told my JW sister how I feel. She had no clue how I was feeling.
I am in Max's shoes as well. Although I am not angry, I am distraught with grief. It's as if I am mourning the loss of my own life. I was a JW for nearly 20 years. I have NO job history or career, I have NO college education and when I did go to college for one semester, I was told that if I continued I would be marked. Now here I am in my 40's and realizing I lost ALL the best years of my life to a cult. I often wonder, at 40+, is it even worth going on at this point?
Hello friend, it's always worth going on. The best years of your life are not gone, they are yet to come! Any decade can be your best, you can fill your future with wonderful happy experiences. Live them to the full and don't give up. I'm so sorry to hear 40 years were taken from you, don't let them take away the next decades of your life too. Fill your coming years with all the things you always wanted to do, explore and discover new things to love. I'm struggling with my own trauma and have yet to succeed, but 'forgiveness' the act of cutting the emotional ties that bind you, abandoning hate, anger and even grief, is the key to moving forward and finding peace. I've been working on that for a good decade. I'm not able to fully forgive yet but I hope to one day have that strength.
@@FullMetalFeline Thank you for your kind words. I am so grateful exJWs can support each other.
I know this isn’t a contest but any amount of time we feel was stolen is legit.
I got out at 46 and feel a lot of anger. But I have since gotten an education, received therapy, and am living a full life. At first it was horrible but with time I’ve been able to deal. Thank you Lloyd for your work. Hugs to Max!
I'm glad for you, Ginger! You were saved, Jesus says He calls His sheep. John 10:3 KJV
3 To him the porter openeth; and the sheep hear his voice: and he calleth his own sheep by name, and leadeth them out.
@@bernadette4484 I had to respond. I saved myself. Jesus had nothing to do with it. In fact I’m an atheist now because I’ve learned to think for myself and have developed critical thinking skills.
@@Gingergurl61 A believer & a non-believer are no better than one another, that's fine you're an atheist, sometimes I feel that way but it's innate in me to believe in Jesus (Yehoshua) I can't help it. The thing is that Demonic Cult has changed a lot of people to atheist,
I totally understand how that can happen. I belong to no religion nor any special church & I never will.
@@Gingergurl61 I admire your bravery. It’s not easy to express critical independent thinking. You must be feeling liberated for not being under the control of any religious ideology.
The best thing that could have happened to me and my mental health was finding this channel, for years (10 to be exact) I didn't know if I had made a huge mistake leaving and still had the shits put up me when my parents told me the end was near. Now I know I absolutely have made the right choice and I no longer have fear, I have courage to stand up to the endless efforts of my family to get me back in. I am so thankful to you Lloyd. I am still angry of the childhood that was taken away from me however now I immerse myself in giving my young son everything that I never got. Go buy your first Christmas tree, celebrate your birthday, go to a Halloween party and be happy you still have time because lots of JWs have died not knowing any different.
I also feel like my time has been stolen from me I understand what you mean.
Preaching to the choir, Max, buddy. Preaching to the choir. I've had 44 of the best years of my life stolen by the JW org. I finally woke up in 2020, and I often look back in anger, thinking of how many bad choices I've made in my life, with decisions strongly influenced by the org. Like many others, I'm trying to pick up the pieces of my life, and live it the best way I can with a new fresh start for the rest of the years remaining to me...
For me the same also 40+ years there and thought why did not i examine earlier. Feel stupid about it. I had many years already a strange feeling about fake behaviour there, own rules and knew that they are not real friends. Many left and were also doubting. I felt locked up.
You're telling my story. 34 yrs for me. I was df'd in 2014 in absentia. Now I am 66 and basically over it, except when I hear something in particular or remember something said or done. Then the anger and resentment returns, but only briefly, (hour or two). Some of the best and worst people are in the org. It is a tragedy the good are as blinded as the bad. My indoctrination was strong, I was not raised a witness, I took to the "truth" like a fish on live bait. I was hooked. LOL. I can laugh at it now, but I still feel the pain for all the lost opportunities open to a young man. Call me 34 years behind.
I wish I could 'reverse witness' by going back to all those doors and apologize to the people who live there for trying to get the them to join a CULT.
Just remember "I am not what happens to me but how I responded to it". You can overcome this. I'm not an ex Jehovah witness but I am an ex Christian and feel very similar about the anger. Your not alone.
I feel the same way. I decided it wasn't Christianity to blame. Rather ORGANIZED religion is to blame. Jesus warned us about it. He even asked the question "Will the true faith be found on the earth when the son of man arrives? I attend no organized religion or church but am not opposed to speaking about my Christian faith when talking to another person who has respect for the Father and the Christ...and me.
Hi Max, I think a lot of us suffer with that same type of anger you described. It can sometimes feel overwhelming and in my personal experience, it started getting in the way of my relationships with other people. Talking about it with someone can help so much! Especially if it's someone who's been through it themselves. Just having that person validate what you're saying and understand what it was like can really help to get it off your chest.
As much as its your anger and you are entitled to feel angry, you can't let it control your life. You need to make peace with it and make peace with yourself, if like me you sometimes blame yourself for some of the things you went through.
I sometimes get so upset with my family and former friends who are still JWs for the way they treat me, and in times like that, I need to remind myself of what its like to think the way they are thinking, and the fact that they're being unduly influenced, and I remind myself how lucky I am to be freed from that. It helps a lot.
I love the advice. Basically turn your pain into purpose
They stole 37 years from me. I was 5 when my mother "Got the Truth". I was 42 when I left. I'll be 52 this month.
I totally empathize - please don't let what happened in your past steal your future. The past decade has been one of immense growth and learning for me. I feel incredibly lucky to have escaped, raised my son as an independent, free thinker.
Most JWs never do.
I salute you Sir! Don't let them win. The best revenge is in Living Well.
I wish you happiness and peace, and send love and best wishes.
No better reply to the anger problem of the former JW like myself. I've gained immensely from your brilliant response. Thanks greatly.
Wasted times indeed - wasted with what we were doing and more so for what we were NOT ...
Missed opportunity, needless fear and guilt ... the most spectacular waste was field service !! Not just for our time but strangers time AND it’s the most inefficient way to recruit to a cause ! How many labor hours per baptism ?
It’s likely that’s why they’ve leaning so hard on making their own “pop culture”
It's been 8 years since I've faded, and I'm still angry about the time that was taken from me. He's experiencing the depression that many faded ones go through when you have just left the cult. I've been in mental health counseling for the past 12 years, and still am. Believe it or not, mental health counselors have heard just about everything. And they're unbelievably understanding of my issues. So yes, your advice for him to get counseling is spot on. It's the first step to deprogramming. And this will take a long time.
The main question is "what is it good for... now that you are out?" ... It only steals more of your time and energy (been there) ... The healing starts with forgiveness and focusing on today instead of yesterday or even tomorrow (not that easy, but powerfull) ... I mean "let go"
Again you found the right words, Lloyd. Max, let me tell you this: most of the time i can deal with the past. Yet there are still days when i am confronted with it in a way that brings up again all the disappointments, the pain and the missed opportunities. Then i feel anger, hot flamming anger. And i start dreaming of burning kingdom halls, hunting down the governing body and what have you. But then what ? What good would that do ? It would be throwing away the life i took back from watchtower and into my own hands. And boy it is much too precious to do so. What the anger you happen to feel does is it brings you the power to say " never again will anybody do that to me".
Very nice studio Lloyd…❤
No need to be angry.
I believed this religion for 30 years and raised my kids in it.
Now we are all free and it really does help us with learning lessons along the way.
Enjoy your life because it's something to be grateful for.
Be happy you see it for what it is.
Let go of the past and enjoy all your meant to
Anger is just a feeling and just like any other feeling it needs to go somewhere. It just needs to be felt and dealt with in a constructive way. Once the source of the anger is dealt with in a proper manner and the person is able to go deep into what's causing their anger and release it, the feelings of anger will no longer be there...
This is why psychedelic healings like Ayahuasca and psychedelic mushrooms are so amazing successful in healing people even after just one or two sessions. Psychedelics make you go very deep inside of you and allow you to release things and feelings that you didn't even know were there and allows you to release these feelings 🙂
@@muszr00m Indeed
Being happy 24/7, nonstop, super, super positive, everything is great isn't normal either.
Oh, of course. It makes sense that someone who raised their kids in this cult would be more comfortable minimizing the anguish suffered by born-ins who leave.
I think it is normal to feel angry when you look back and see that so many years of your life have gone to waste.
You can feel this way for so many reasons, for example, when someone stays too long in a toxic relationship.
But I see it this way, if you only keep on looking at the past, you are doing nothing but wasting more time.
It's ok to give yourself some space to look at the past, especially when you do the healing work (meaning therapy), but try not to stay too long in there.
It always helps me to ask myself: what am I going to do with the years I have left?
I hope it helps,
Ilian
I needed to hear this. Thank you
Time was stolen from you my friend, move forward. I bugged out 35 years ago and went on to do 3 degrees and I am now a senior teacher in Japanese, Chinese and Linguists. Stick it to the man. Find out who you are, follow your heart, and get on with it.
“Find out who you are, follow your heart, and get on with with it” - such valuable advice.
Thank you for asking Max, many can relate! And thank you Lloyd for the platform!
What do you want to do with your anger? Well, I wish I could destroy their facilities and steal their money. However, since im an ant compared to a billionaire company, I will have to move on and heal. But tbh: its a pathetic outcome
Angry because you are not stupid😢
Max is quite right to voice this anger and undoubtedly most, if not all exiting this cult will be feeling anger of some type. With Lloyds response when talking about turning things into positives, I found this helped. I think about all of the times I was felt pressured to do the talks in the TMS, it’s made me a better public speaker today. Having to comment in meetings has probably made me more vocal in meetings at work. Being forced to go out on service has probably meant I don’t have any hesitations to talk to people I’ve never met before. From little things such as being able to dress well (even to put a tie on at an early age) to the bigger things like being put into a disciplined structure of studying and even into being able to critique your belief and understandings, as you would have done when you reached your decision to exit. Please draw on your own positives, and there will be more, but it does help. As years go by and more skills develop, you’ll probably realise - that’s why I’m good at this because of ‘that’. It won’t heal the anger completely but it will dilute it. Hope this helps.
Completely agree, precious time were stolen. I’m not a jw, but some of my family members including an aunt, who I was forced to lived with abroad for 4years was not fun. I knew from the time she asked me to get a pair of sandals and “sunday clothes”, nothing would have come out of it in good terms-it was a nightmare living with a strict jw. It saddens me sometimes when I think of what happened before when I was coerced (out of respect to her) to attend meeting and bible studies, conventions, assemblies and what not. The only time I refuse to attend a meeting is when I lied that I have stomach cramps. Another time, when I stood my ground just so I didn’t have to lie anymore, a salad bowl flew to the sink because my aunt was angry, that she don’t live with “worldly people”, that they are in the “truth”. I thought to myself, that comment made me feel like a bad person or criminal. And still offered me to take a taxi, just so I don’t feel “lazy” to attend a meeting-I thought that was childish lol. She was hell bent on keeping me to their cult, she bought a car few months after just so we don’t have to take the bus anymore to attend meetings. She loved that I was friends with the jw in their congregation, I liked the friendships but then they caught on that I wasn’t a jw nor studying, they refuse to be friends with me one day-just flat out saying “you’re not a jw and I can’t be friends with you”-and I thought that was the stupidest conversation I had with a jw. Even after 13 years of leaving my aunt, I still feel angry towards her, I feel defensive at times, panicky that she would still control me. It completely changed me as a person sadly, I get angry easily sometimes, pessimistic, judgmental, and very critical of other people-knowing they also a have a good side. Had I known accounts like Lloyd Evans if there ever was back in 2004, I could have counteracted the ways she raised up her cult in a pedestal, the way she shamed me regarding my own beliefs and choices in life, and choosing my own friends outside her congregation. The effect it has on me made it hard to forgive and to forget.
Right i was born into it..baptized while still in highschool... missed out on alot of things like prom. Birthdays. Holidays. But got out while still young which is great but yeah it does hurt when you realize how much you missed out on and realize it is not harmful at all....😔🙏🏾
I feel the same. I’m very angry
Thanks for liking my comment
And justifiably so.
Anger is an energy. Own it, use it.
@@alisonschmitt9533 I do ;)
@@Newdisaster ❤
I lost my youth, now I am 63 waiting to die without having lived, I am very upset, I cty, yell even I am desperate.
I would like to go back to the States, but I no longer have connections, so I am stuck in Italy waiting to die, I don't have savings, cos harmagheddon was caming, I left a career as a designer, worldly ambience, so now I am lonely and dieing alone...
So sad so angry, very very angry.
And I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw them wearing gold watches, the other one, the clawn that did not explain his own brother that there is no point in collecting war memorabilia, weren't this things items to discard as they where simbols9 of blood shed,?
❤❤❤ You still have two years until 65...make those two years count...it does not make up for what they stole from you, but at least its something. "Youth" is in the mind...
If you've only just disassociated, then the experience is new. There are healthy avenues to release your anger. Therapy, art, sports etc. Rediscover who you are without the man made rules.
I disassociated back in 1993 and still get angry! I used alcohol for a long time to try and get over the resentment, but that was not the answer. I ultimately converted to Reform Judaism and found an intelligent group that includes atheists and agnostics. It’s comforting to belong to a group without having to believe in myths. (+I am learning Hebrew from Real Scholars-some of whom have actually lived in Israel)
I now have bee sober for over 9 years and have a relationship with family members, who also exited the cult or never belonged. Watching these videos has helped, but at times brings back the memories of resentment. However, knowing that I am no longer a part of the high-control group brings a sense of immense satisfaction and smile to my face!😊
I can relate, when I was young I was athletically gifted, and my talents were stolen from me bc my mother became a JW & I couldn't fulfill my true aspirations bc it was denied to me
Same here.
Played football in Texas and gave up offers from Ole Miss, Baylor, Texas Tech, Auburn and a number of other schools.
My mom decided to get baptized and I HAD to as well.
The elders ended sports for me with the Bad associations scriptures advice to my mom.
I remember at the time ( 1996 ) BEGGING her to let me play as I would NEVER be able to have that chance again.
I feel resentment because it essentially amounts to stepping on your child's dreams and aspirations in life.
I just don't understand how anyone can do that.
@@CS-np2oo it's not natural, normal parents want their children to do better than them in life & be happy, it goes to show this WT cult is so twisted & demented
What an encouraging, well thought out reply Lloyd. I really hope it sets that young man on a good path to the future.
Thank you for sharing your story and feelings with us viewers. So glad you woke up. It will take time and a lot of work on yourself. As Lloyd said seek a therapist. And keep working on yourself. 😊
Thanks Lloyd for your video. Your Chanel also saved my last month.
I left as a teenager(disfellowshipped) mom never spike all these yrs until I got reinstated in Nov 2016. She never even got to know my children...they were nonexistent to her....I never knew TATT the whole time I was dissed....but like 3months after getting reinstated.....I found out...I spaaaaazzed out n ran and told anybody that would listen!! Needless to say I was dissed again in FEB 2017!!! IT WAS Q BLESSING IN DISGUISE...NOW I KNOOOOOW IT WASN'T MEEEE IT WAS ALLL BS!!!....I was definitely the poster child for when you get dissed!! But nooow I'm the best meee ever since nooow I knooooow that I'm a good person and the guilt,low self-esteem,people pleasing, doubting myself etc....is over!!!!
Beautiful background. New location shaping up nicely!
I was raised in the 60’s and was told the end was coming in 1975 😮! I left it when I became able to get out of my parents home! They say now they NEVER said the end was coming !!!!! Liars Liars!!!!!
I lost two years to the JW and it pisses me off too. I can't imagine how pissed I would be if I lost, say, 20 or 30 years.
I can relate, it takes to heal and move on, not easy,,but can be done,
Looking good Lloyd! Thanks!
Time that Was Stolen from You Makes people Angry 😡 Because you can't get that Time Back it's Past!!!
They stole seven years of my life. I disassociated in November 2021. I still deal with anger issues. I was prescribed medication by a psyquiatrist. It has helped.
I get angry at indoctrination and the merging of religion and politics. I’m angry every day but I don’t let it dominate me.
Hi Lloyd, I'm glad to see you. Looking great!
Everyone who’s left this organization/cult should get therapy. It’s so helpful in working through your feelings and helping you to successfully move on in life.
Me 27yrs.inn left 2 1/2 yrs. Ago ! Yes I was very angry too, especially when I ran into the ones who I thought where friends. But then I realized they are indoctrinated like I was! Jesus is real neighbor! But not the Jesus they teach and don’t listen too! I found truth , peace, and knowledge through him! He is the PRINCE OF PEACE! Acts17:27 and the FATHER literally is not far off from each one of us , including Mr.. Evans
Excellent and very mature response.
Easily 30yrs of my life wasted!
i lost 23 years of my life in this way....it take it me all most 3 years for i forgive me ...
I feel so bad for him but I'm also happy for him because I'm still in the cult and want to leave because there simply not enough good reasonings to believe that the governing bodies teachings are truly from God and it came to a point where I don't even believe anything that comes from their mouths anymore. But I am not going anywhere now, I'll need to make money and get a place of my own, there is no way I can simply go homeless, and I can't afford to. I'm making the most efforts at getting employed because leaving is my motivation. I won't leave in a hateful way either, I want to leave everyone in peace to prove JWs yet again that Apostates aren't as evil as they claim, and yes I'll help spread their indoctrination and manipulation methods. I believe they are good people, but they aren't strict about their whole lives for God and that's how I feel. Lloyd you're a big inspiration too.
I just tried your link to Speakpipe and it's not found. Did you update the information or is there a problem with the link in the description?
The cult robbed me of 50+ years of my life! If I only knew then what I know now, my life would be so damned much better without the nagging guilt I had as a JW!
@Super Dave - What was it that woke you up?
Spot on cedars ❤
They the witness took 5 years of my life from 1981 to 1987 I never get those years back if only social media was around from 81 to 87 I would not got into becoming a witness wasted years I learn from my mistakes peace and love
Serve Jehovah 'more fully'. Do more. Do more. Do more. Have a 'full share'. There was always the pressure through videos or personal experience to 'do more'. What a big waste of time. Oh, by the way, did you 'turn in your time'. It's almost the first of the month. Make sure to turn you time in.
You sound very much like my children. They are angry. I feel guilt and sadness but I did what I thought was right, the only thing I knew. I got out recently when I turned 50 and my kids just into their 30's. I was lucky, they came out with me.I didn't lose them, which adds a huge other layer of anger for lots of people. We all feel the same, regardless of age. I find myself wanting to bargain, which is unrealistic. Or just wishing for at least 10 good years back. I tell them at least they're younger or haven't raised their children in it yet but I have realized we all grieve it and need to. It will just take time. The hard part for me is trying to wrap my head around actually making decisions now. Before I felt like I floated through life without any other direction but that. And Now I have to find a career, get an education, save for my very short future ( started too late) and I am angry and no fun because I feel like I have that ticking clock on top of me and I feel rushed to experience things, travel act but no resources to do it. I suggest writing, making lists of what you're grieving, what you can and can't change and a goal list...checking off boxes is oddly satisfying. Talk to people who can empathize with you and help others too. I am starting to write, starting a blog soon I hope to help other young women who have suffered at the hands of elders or others in the hall. Even if it doesn't draw people in it will help me just by writing it. I or any number of people are here to talk to I am sure if you want. Just remember to move forward and not stay stagnant in anger, its the only way to get through it I think and hopefully let it go after time. Much love- :)
Well said Lloyd.
You are looking well lloyd 🤩
It makes me angry to watch the meeting Programm of the Week of 26.10.2022, about higher education. They steal the opportunity’s young people have in life.
Baffles me as to why almost all the so called voicemails are from the states.
Do you have any at all from the UK because I'm unable to find any..
I love your background.
I'm sure it's already been said here, but anyway... Firstly, it's totally normal to feel this way. Secondly, if you feel too overwhelmed or desperate, maybe seek professional help (as Lloyd suggested). It does take time to 'get over' it all, but try to take comfort from the experiences of others who will usually tell you it gets easier with the passing of time. I know it's easier said than done, but try to focus on the positive things in your life. For a start, you're out of the organisation. That's a huge positive. You sound young, so maybe calculate how many hours you would have spent sitting in boring meetings over the next 25 years - and also the amount of time you would spend knocking on doors or standing next to a cart or whatever. All completely wasted time, which you can now spend constructively and/or in an enjoyable way. You're out now. Rejoice! Your journey is just beginning. 🙂
Max it will pass wishing you the best we’ve all been through it get a good therapist it takes time to heal and build a new life…. Praying for you….
I think that it's healthy to feel anger and sadness for a while after leaving a religious group like the JWs, especially if you were emotionally invested in the faith to a high degree.
Hi Lloyd I’m angry too time gets stolen from you and it’s something that you can never get back.
Think of it this way perhaps...you didn't have 60 years stolen from you like myself. How lucky are you really? Now that's real 🍋🍋 lemonade! 😘🌹
I agree with Lloyd, Max, if you are able to, you might want to consider seeking help from a mental health professional. But, to answer your question: no, you're not wrong for feeling angry or for feeling that much time was stolen from you by having been a JW. I think that is a pretty common feeling that is shared by countless ex-Witnesses from across the world.
You are going thru the 5 stages of grief for your former life. It will get better.
Armageddon Is place not a war.--- REV 16 6 And they gathered them together to the place called in Hebrew, Armageddon.
Lloyd you're looking so handsome, I just wanted to tell you that. 😉😊
If you build and plan a FUTURE for yourself, you will stop feeling angry and hateful. Constantly thinking about the past won't help you.
I was brought up as a J.W. Best thing I ever did was leave. I pity the remaining witnesses. I also pity people that spend their post J.W. freedom listening to other angry ex J.W'S! MOVE ON!
Hi Lloyd, you've lost some weight, atleast ot looks like you have. You're looking good anyway. 👍
When are you going to do the September 2022 JW BROADCASTING rebuttal ? There's so much material there. It's almost October. If you're not going to do a rebuttal I'd like to know why.
I appreciate the call and the lost time, but you should be happy you left. Once out move on and enjoy the next phase of your life. Unless something serious has occurred, move on from it and enjoy the free air
Anger is the worst adviser! Amongst the JWs you had the chance to gain good knowledge about The Bible and get to know great people! It is only up to you what you will now do with your own life! We are living in the end times and the Great Tribulation and Armageddon are very very close.
God was using other people to serve him if they would let him
No one group or church is the right one but God is using different people from different churches who are born again and saved and these make up the church or body of Christ.
Greetings from Slovakia
Look for free relax class, videos on TH-cam, meditation yoga breathing, take walk on the beach, the city parks. Pick up hobbies like art, or even join support groups. There are lots of things available, and some are free/low cost. Meeting new people and friends is helpful.
Don't worry brother life is short and we are constantly learning.
You are fortunate to have realized the deceit and false teachings.
Now is your opportunity to do more research in the bible truth and get to know Jesus.
I pray the holy spirit guides you and comforts you in these hard days.
The reward is great if you trust and obey Gods 10 laws of love.
You will have Eternal life to look forward too.
My daughter is probably going to feel the same as u do..Like her entire life was taken by this culty-religion. She's 4. My ex-wife went back to them. She's living by book now. She ignores me & has taken our daughter away. I wish u well & accept that this happened..& live the rest of your life free from them. I study them thru Lloyd becuz I want to know what they're brain washing my family with..so far is seems like it's a fiction novel. Their soap opera vids are cringy. My daughter makes me do bible study w/her over the phone. My ears bleed & I have to unscrew my smile after we hang up. But I do it because I love her with all my heart. She's my bubbs!!! Stay strong..You're free & awake!!! I'm proud of you Max!!!!!!
Come on Lloyd,you've already listened to the recording you don't have to pretend to be making notes to give your answer.. Still love your show..🙂
Actually I do genuinely make notes. I listen to voicemails once when selecting them and when I give them a final listen on camera I make notes just to make sure I touch on the important points/details. Glad you like the show! 🙂
I was also angry, but I've found that only a relationship with Jesus Christ brings peace through the Holy Spirit. This peace is NOT the way the world gives it. Read John 14:25-31. Also, a relationship with the Holy Spirit begins the moment you believe on the real Gospel that Jesus was a the fullness of Almighty God in flesh and died for your sins and returned to His Father who is greater than His flesh (Jesus) after resurrection. Read entire Colossians.
By denying the Trinity, Jehovah’s Witnesses could never receive the Holy Spirit. Therefore, we could not fellowship with both the Father, The Son and the Holy Spirit, which is divine PEACE (John 14:20,23).
It takes time to heal. Anger is part of the process. Welcome to being Awake. We love you.
I have dedicated my channel to revive our exjw brothers and sisters with pure Bible Truths.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is helping me (a never-JW). Steven Hassan, cult expert and psychologist, has a website that specializes in helping former cult members. Lloyd, would you please do an episode on the new book 'President Donald J. Trump, The Son of Man - The Christ' by Helgard Muller in conjunction with an older book 'The Cult of Trump' by Steven Hassan.
Time wasn't really "stolen." You gave it to them freely. It was mistake just like all mistakes we make in life. We need to thoroughly research everything before we give our time to it.
If you were born and raised a JDub, it was completely out of your control.
@@Bouddica When I was kid i had no freedom, I went to kH and other JW stuff nice way or beating up and had to go anyways, theres nothing freely. Everythings was control by fear. Freely I wish.
@@Bouddica
I understand. This happens in every Religion.
@@tiiatuuli339
I was talking about Adults and not children. Of course children have no choice. Thanks for your comment.
It was stolen because it was a scam. You are pretty good with the victim blaming. Let's put the blame on the victims rather than the conman...
Whose tibor
His Video editor
@@Emmibeth24 got it
Dude man up . You let them continue to steal time from you by not moving on. Enjoy your life