If Streaming Services Were Honest | Honest Ads
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ก.ค. 2024
- What if streaming services like HBOMax, Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, and others were actually honest about how horrifically terrible they are? Roger Horton investigates.
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Roger Horton: Jack Hunter
Streamers: Jordan Breeding, Anna Breeding
Writer: Mark Hill
Director: Jordan Breeding
Director of Photography: Dave Brown
Editor: Jordan Breeding
Sound: Mike Schoen
Production Assistant: Eli Hall
Mark's Twitter: / mehil
Jordan’s Twitter: / the_j_breeding
Jordan's TH-cam Channel: / @drjordanbreeding
Dave’s Instagram: / deforestbrown
00:00 - If Streaming Services Were Honest
05:26 - Roger F****** Loses It!
#hbomax #netflix #warnerbros - ตลก
Roger is my favorite working actor at this point, and it's not even close.
couldn't agree more
Hey! A youtuber in the comments!
Put him in your film
He's soooo good
wait, what the fuck are you doing here?
Netflix: "Don't look at the reviews. In fact, we'll just remove them altogether so you don't know what kind of crap you're going to waste your time on."
100% it started when that Jewish girl who wasn't funny had a special'
An Frank?
@@geigertec5921 Sarah Silverman
@@GeneralChangFromDanang isn’t it ironic those peoples names, always have gold, silver and green in their name?
@@playdiscgolf1546 I don't think you know what 'ironic' means.
I love that Roger losing it is its own time stamp. If I ever want to listen to Roger cursing, it's right there within easy reach.
It's also the only one besides the start lol
It's all that matters
@@cracked It’s the content that the internet wants, even!
@@cracked Knowing this exists just made my day
and the team can't help but laugh. fantastic!
"Maybe we can just like have a conversation."
"Whoa! Let's not do something you'll regret."
I can always count on Roger to keep me on the right track.
Haha, that one-liner was golden!
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I love Roger's meltdown at the end. 😂
#ThisUsHortonTurfMotherfkr 😅😅😅😅
Jordan tries to hide his face but you can see in his eyes that he's breaking🤣
Been better if they said there is always bit torrent
The ending parts with the blankets being added and Roger losing it was hilarious
The look on Jordan's face as the blanket comes down was priceless.
This is definitely the content the Internet wants. Thanks for providing. 😆
You bet!
tbh, they almost killed the channel when roger disappeared for a couple of months
@@NerdyCatCoffeeee He disappeared for over three years, dude. Everybody got fired. We were on hiatus for a long time.
Rumor has it condom size always is sold as XL not sure if true, am XXL so....
@@cracked Jokes on you if this is a coma guy and no one wants to break the illusion.
I truly understand the part about watching a great series and then it gets cancelled. I just get a free movie from the library and call it a day.
The first one that got me was Santa Clarita Diet, cancelled despite everybody loving it. Then Netflix did it again with Inside Job. Amazon's The Expanse was cancelled TWICE, fans never getting a satisfying finale.
@cautiouslycynical9786 Expanse only got rescued because Jeff fricking Bezos wanted to see how it ended. That's what it took.
@@cautiouslycynical9786The Expanse 😢 maybe hope for more seasons One day covering all things that happened in the remaining books
And the indie shows w great tits to make up for substance so much boob I think I’ve seen more boob on Netflix then the hub
There's always fan fiction :)@@cautiouslycynical9786
I remember when competitors to Netflix were being announced and launching in 2017. Everyone was excited about and I was like, "This is terrible! Now we will have to go to multiple services to get the same enjoyment that we get on just one. They will all pull their properties and make the quality worse and more expensive." Sad that is exactly what happened. I just alternate between any one of them for a month when the shows and movies I want all drop and then cancel.
The internet has made competition more expensive then monopolies for the consumer in some industries.
Let's nationalize streaming
@@whwhywhywhywhywhywhy It is more the lack of competition. Every production company has to have their own streaming service for exclusives instead of licensing them out to multiple streaming services and forcing them to compete with quality of service.
@@nobodyimportant2470 there are too many production companies competing so they should outsource the competition to other companies instead because that will increase competition?
i
Monopoly bad, dumb dumb.
@@whwhywhywhywhywhywhy My point is that everyone having their own streaming service for their exclusive content doesn't encourage you to pick 1 over another but instead to subscribe to all of them. This drives people to pirate as the cost of subscribing to so many services for 1-2 shows each adds up fast.
If Netflix, Hulu, and Disney+ all had the exact same shows then they would be forced to compete by under cutting each other or offering better services.
“Vampire House Hunters” - wait, is this a show for people looking to buy a vampire house, or a show about vampires looking to buy a regular house? Eh, either way I’m in for at least the first 5 episodes.
The vampires having to wait outside because they were never invited in 🤣
@@fennecfoxfanatic na it only works when the house is owned, if its not owned by anyone or by a public thing lke the bank , then totally can enter! :P
Clearly it's a show about hunting down houses that happen to also be vampires.
... However that works.
@@Bluebedo landlords
That... Might actually make for a funny parody web series!
"...as well as twelve dozen 90s movies starring talking babies"
Me: *remembers Baby Geniuses and gets war flashbacks*
Dark days
Personally, I'd be binging the "Animals Playing Human Sports Because The Rules Don't Say They Can't" category.
@@jasonblalock4429 at least Air Bud doesn’t give me PTSD by proxy
huh, my first thought was the "look whose talking" movies.
@@sheoakgirl Look Who's Talking 12 was pretty good
I swear this channel is the only thing keeping sane in this crazy ass world. Never change cracked, never change.
May I interest you in some thejuicemedia?
He forgot "let's not forget that you won't be able to talk about any of the shows you're watching with the few friends you have left because dumping entire series in one day means that you'll all be at different parts, and can't ever talk about it."
The endings of these kill me, I am already low on oxygen from the rest of it.. then I just suffocate in the end... please never stop killing me!
Dw, oxygen is killing you, too.
"By day, he's a helicopter pilot. But by night, he fights crime... as a werewolf"
-Captain Murphy, Sealab 2021
Sounds more interesting than most stuff on Netflix.
"I stare at my phone until I wake up the next day"
all streaming services as a collective: WONDERFUL!
Reject modernity (streaming), embrace tradition (piracy)
thepiratebay is still running, and I'd rather donate to them than pay netflix.
We must protect Roger at all cost.
How much would you pay monthly?
The fact that you need to pay for so many different streaming services to watch all the shows you want to see is the best argument for piracy.
Or just don't watch and do real-world activities, I find life more enjoyable after I stopped binge watching shows. The plots are all same so once you seen enough you basically predict them all. They no longer get me 'hooked' and I've no sense of fulfillment after finishing a series.
@@IchiroSakamoto Ok boomer
@@TheLobsterCopter5000 He's maybe a boomer. But he's speaking facts.
95% of streaming shows are just the same garbage once you seen enough.
@@hypnoz7871 Yep, just what a boomer would say
@@TheLobsterCopter5000almost like people with more experience know things lol
Roger repeatedly shouting obscenities just off-screen is _exactly_ the kinda content I subscribed for.
I think Roger is the only thing keeping this channel alive
He was the only thing for awhile there
Yeah for me it definitly is
Ah, but who keeps Roger alive?
This is unacceptable Jordan slander
Jordan clearly has Roger locked in Dave's mom's basement. Try not to anger him or we may lose this treasure forever.
What makes Hortflix different from other streaming services is that Roger stars in all the shows, sign me up right now
Fair haha
Roger is a national treasure
Roger is the hero that we don’t deserve.
Now just give us a video of Roger cursing for 6 mins straight
Oooooo I just might
Please make a short! The internet would also love that.... ❤️
@@cracked “I” because only one person works at Cracked anymore
@@TacomasterStudios Not technically true but close!
Do it. Ill pay a dollar for that
At the end, Roger going off like he just got challenged to a Rock-off.
I’m surprised Roger didn’t turn into a shrieking ball of lava and instantly consumed them when he said he stole his parents password.
I was stuck in the gig economy when streaming services came to power, so the idea of shelling out $10/month for a subscription when I had a $400+/month individual-plan health insurance premium to make didn't fly. It also wasn't until the video rental stores started dying and selling off their inventory that you discovered just how much direct-to-video garbage was out there; now they call that stuff "streaming exclusives."
The dude's face when Roger put the blanket on him was so precious xD
Roger: I'll raise monthly fee after they're hooked.
Me: Wait what monthly ? Oh you mean laughs and roasts of mainstream companies, yeah sure man go ahead.
But on a serious note, I have to commend the effort put into these not just by our man Roger whole cracked team, you guys rock.
What?
3:42 it's the little touches like they can't see eachother because of the pillow that makes these videos not just fantastic, but bloody brilliant! ❤
“Which we’ll cancel when the creative talent asks for more money..” 🔥🔥🔥🔥
😂😂😂 I'll steal the password too.
U cant anymore
@@jimmychavez5559 I just noticed yesterday 😭
If you join the parent's network and your own network with a VPN, it's doable.
"Maybe we should have a conversation". "Whoa-! Let's not do something you'd regret". 😆.......
That ending was amazing!
I love how comfy he looked 😂
I really love how your wife is getting more screen time! does this mean your marriage (and house?) count as a write-off?
Ha this isn’t our house, but yes I married her for tax reasons.
@@cracked Always the romantic, Dr. Jordan+ BreedingMAX
OMG, Roger losing his shit at the end should be an entire episode by itself.
Roger is back! I’ve miss these videos.
These keep getting better.
Damn, glad I picked up my Horton's Reality Escaping Electronic Brick instead.
But seriously, Jack Hunter is a goddamn treasure.
Oh that's Roger's real life name lol. For real though that man is on another level. Dude cracks me up every time.
Yes. Yes he is.
"whoa, let's not do something you'll regret"
Lol, that killed me.
IDK why streaming services don't just limit the number of devices per account that can stream at one time. Pay x amount to stream on one device at a time, pay y amount to stream on 2 devices at a time, etc... If Netflix calls me out for sharing with kids then I'm cancelling.
That movie about a ghost haunted by a ghost really does sound good.
3:38 kills me; both because its funny, and because its so true.
You guys really expanded the Horton Extended Universe in this one. Can't wait for the one where Roger fights Bezos for control of the world's last dollar!
gold comment hiding in depths
I'll just steal my parents password triggers the greatest meltdown... EVER! Roger, well played!
This is so accurate tho 🤣 eapicaly when the guy said this is the content I want
Roger never fails to entertain.
And that ending, A W E S O M E.
Roger acting like an profane energizer bunny, he just keeps cursing and cursing and cursing.
lol
The bloopers and outtakes are hilarious ! 😂
This IS the content the internet wants! 👏 👏 👏
Wow, I’ve found your channel recently and you’ve really made me start questioning everything lol. Thanks Roger and team!
"this is the content the internet wants" yes it is.😂👍
You had me at "Copter Docs."
Roger is back yeah
This is why we’ve reached another golden age of piracy :)
We go!
Got to admit, piracy is pretty great.
Which sites
@@notsurewhat2put I'm guessing the pirate bay
I've never felt so attacked before. The only thing that kept me from cringing for the entire 5 minutes and 46 seconds was the 20 second Roger meltdown at the end. All is now forgiven! :D
I love that you guys have brought back Cracked from the ether and made it funny again! Roger is likely my favorite character, but you all keep me in stiches.
Hey thanks for giving me a chance!
As always check our sources in the description, you can buy the shirt Anna is wearing at our online store (the-cracked-dispensary.creator-spring.com/listing/new-roger-horton-tennis-chihua?product=46) and if you shoot me your email here I’ll send you some behind the scenes stuff we can’t publish on TH-cam. forms.gle/A7JZTU5UR7fr7DxSA
Where is "If Big TH-camrs were Honest?" Oh because that would expose you.
I am watching it and I am in no means peculiar or unholy so this is clearly the content the internet wants.
Might i suggest "If package delivery services were honest" ?
the solution is obviously piracy
Wow! Great writing, good delivery. This was so well done.
I thought Aldous Huxley was fast with new word combinations but this brave new Rodger has zeitgeist !
I would genuinely watch a film about a ghost getting haunted by another ghost.
Me and everyone i know stopped using Netflix when they started making anyone that wasn't in the same household unable to access an account even if they'd lived there for years. It's a joke anyway.
Yo ho ho, matey.
Yes, and everyone of you who stopped paying for Netflix got replaced by two that do... Here, watch some Horton's for free (first month), just sign here for the 3 year dedicated subscription! Price: Your soul! ;)
How do they know that?
I just LOVE Roger's "If xxx Were Honest" series! They are spot on! Roger is terrific. Are TH-cam video "actors" bound by SAG-AFTRA strikes? Roger should do a "If Union Leaders were Honest" video!
Haha! My wife and I look just like Jordan and the lady after we finally get our daughter to sleep.
That's my actual wife, so we're just doing what we always do haha
@@cracked That is just adorable
Netflix in particular is rather terrible about the whole "we'll slowly edge out stuff you want to see for our 'originals'" type thing. I used Netflix briefly many years ago when they were pretty much the only streaming service, and there was an absolute ton of great shows on there. Then last year I signed up for it again to finally get around to trying a couple of shows that interested me, and I realized that the vast majority of the content they used to have had gone to other streaming services, and that most of Netflix's content these days is low quality adaptations of much better shows, low quality productions that they clearly spent as little they could on, the subbed only versions of anime that has been dubbed for years, or random Korean or Chinese dramas with no dubbing or dubbing so bad that it gives the whole industry a bad name.
They *do* have a few good shows, but they're few and far between and you have to wade through so much junk to find them.
The fact that they're losing content isn't really their fault; the content creators and rival services finally got their crap together and started their own streaming services, and they're not garbage quality any longer. The fact that, to compensate, nearly everything they make easily visible is a Netflix exclusive IS their fault. And it makes the problem look even worse than it is. Pretty soon Netflix will be the service you get once you run out of things to watch on Amazon and Disney... IF it lasts that long.
Yeah it’s getting kind of annoying. Who tf cares about shows like “Virgin River” or whatever it’s called?
Join the superior subbed stans and all that anime, Chinese shows, and K-dramas suddenly turn into amazing content. Just saying.
Honestly why are people blaming Netflix? The people selling them their shows went behind their backs and made new deals for more money resulting in everything being piecemealed off. Netflix did the only reasonable thing it could do, make as much decent to great stuff of its own so that it wouldn't be put out of business by megacorporations with even more money than it poaching all its content in an attempt to assassinate Netflix while also taking its subscribers. It's literally the best possible move Netflix had available. Not just for them, but for subscribers. Which is more than I can say for some other changes like wanting to put ads back in. But I guess at some point if your own customers are blaming you for not having the money to outbid Disney for your shows then you gotta start swinging for the fences. Because dumbass customers actively working against their own interests by taking out their anger at losing shows on you instead of the actual companies that took them away. My personal favorites are the people who supposedly canceled their Netflix years ago but are always current on any new Netflix show or anime that is good. I'm sure some of them do actually just pirate or watch someone else's account but you just KNOW a significant % of them are still subscribed and just talking shit lol.
@@Snooder right? Sub is better than dub. Not to mention, dub is slowly becoming more PC over time including little woke phrases & references not in the original manga. It’s not just for anime either. I watched several Korean shows (Silent Sea, Hellbound, All of Us Are Dead, Squid Game) in Korean
yes this is the content the internet wants.... can we get a 3 hour + video of roger yelling out naughty words?
Roger ASMR... but loud and violent.
If it's not as popular as Squid Game (or Stranger Things) they will cancel it after two seasons. They ONLY want another Stranger Things.
So basically if all the 12-18 year olds aren’t watching, then we’re screwed.
Roger is always the best part of these :D
a SOB...but at least he's honest.
Streaming services aren't even making 2 seasons anymore. They pump up a "great new show", get everyone hooked and then drop it. I don't even watch stuff anymore until the series concludes. If there's only a single season or it ends on a cliff hanger then I don't bother.
Shows either explode first season, and then you can expect 10 additional seasons, each worse than the previous, or it doesn't, so it'll get killed before people even have the time to create a community around it.
There were some very good points made here.
As in me, pointing myself in a different direction away from the 'Streaming Services'.
Glad this guy is still around and does these videos!
🤣Man! Love at the end when Roger didn't seem to realize that that business practice hole. That leaves his companies finance in a tighter spot.
Glad to see this series is back! Missed Roger’s sarcasm
Love this series, so glad that it's back!
My favourite is back! The cursing 🤣 I am sure Roger got those blankets from Groupon as I have an identical one.
there are so many of these videos and THEY ARE ALL TOTALLY ON POINT!!! Makes you question.....everything. Rightfully.
2:21 hits different now
The video is just about one year old. What had changed between then and the time you made your comment?
@@patrickd8654 WGA and now SAG-AFTRA strike
how good is roger.., this writing team is great.., and the performances are great. Good stuff cracked
Hey thanks so much!
Been waiting for this one! 😁 Thanks, Roger!
I love that I needed it so much I had to post to Facebook. Love love love. Please don’t stop
Hahaha, this is genius. ♥ Good job team. 👍 Please show more bloopers of you folks, they are priceless. ♥
THOSE WEREN'T BLOOPERS THEY WERE ART
@@cracked bloopers are art as well. Because they are genuine. Still cool. 😂
Right on the money with this. We've be rogernized.lol. love these videos.
Pure cathartic outro! Roger continues to nail the attitude!
0:45 wow what did I walk into? :) I sure am catching up on a lot of great episodes :) you know I've been cheesily waiting for XD
Roger saying f**k you a dozen times is exactly what I needed to kick into hogj gear this morning.
Thanks!
If i was honest:
Ive been living off free trials since AOL.
I have so many email addresses youd think id house a family of 50
Lost my mind at the ‘Ghost haunting another ghost’ gag… that was delivered perfectly!
The irony that flickering photons and erratic sounds are right this minute lulling my seldom used body into another night (actually afternoon) of sweet sweet unconsciousness.
I want to see Vampire House Hunters! Where do I sign up?
Right here! th-cam.com/video/Y-i7cawhw8s/w-d-xo.html
It always warms my heart to see Jack ... er I mean Roger on my stream.
Looks like that couple was able to buy that house. Also the ending is the best.
Thanks for the content I was needing.
My family makes fun of me for buying Blu-ray and dvd because it’s a “dead format (?)” and everything’s on streaming
Which is great cuz I love that my movie library will disappear and move onto a different service for a fee, and on a whim. I love that episodes or. Intent will be cut because some whiny c*not decided that it’s inappropriate and wrong, which is why I loved it in the first place.
And that's all before how the Internet connection could suddenly conk out and you can't get to the streaming service. Seriously, years ago during a snowstorm a downed tree took out our cable...but I still had my massive personal DVD library.
Same, hate buying digital copy of anything. You’ll own nothing and love it…
If i really like a show/movie i buy a DVD. well if i intend ot watch ti more then once that is.
This makes my day better
2:36
Flashback to blue is the warmest colour
Love these! One of the best things on TH-cam! Roger#1
Roger using Jordan's names for crappy cable networks is hilarious
Another brilliant video. Sort of now questioning a few of my life choices,
0:49 Nah, good ol’ Righty will never leave me.
Don't forget to tag Disney Plus!
Hahaha oh but the end