This dude is mad funny, because his reviews seem so much like a running joke, but there're just enough clues to make you reasonably certain that he actually just lives like this
@@YellowpowR exactly. If this guy says it’s a flaming piece of garbage then you know to go pick up a copy of it. And oc if he says a game is good that means avoid at all costs.
I was not expecting this video to be as funny and entertaining as it was. That being said, there's no replay value, and the greedy developers are charging far too much for what it is. There's nothing to do in the open world, and the multiplayer is laughably bad.
From what I can tell, this guy's perfect game: - Completely free to play. Put as many microtranscations in there as you want though, don't matter to him - Online multiplayer. Literally no replay value without it - Cars as the primary gameplay, or at least something with wheels - Open world with lots of distractions, nothing too open or else it's boring - Physics and graphics that are either super realistic or very funny, nothing in between - Nothing that could possibly be construed as 'cringe' - Slight appeals to nostalgia (pre-GameCube) - Mechanics that are just complex enough to make him think the game is 'deep', anything actually deep he interprets as 'shallow' - When all else fails, simply give him a copy of Red Dead Redemption 2. It's full of stuff this guy loves to complain about in other games, but somehow he gave this one a 10 He strikes me as one of those 'video games aren't fun anymore, but not because I'm feeling miserable myself' doomers, except he complains about everything through Metacritic reviews instead of going onto message boards. No way in hell he's ever played any of his 0/10 games. I assume he's at least in his late 30's, possibly older, if the Atari collection was enough for him to drop a 6 and a "Man, those were the days." Weird guy
"0/10 + no cars + it's $60 + not a shooter + not free + online only + no local co-op multiplayer + greedy, lazy, and cheap + overly exaggerated + terrible soundtrack + bad graphics + bad port + reused assets + steaming pile of garbage"
OnlyOneHere is the kind of guy who saw like 5 old Nostalgia Critic reviews and just made that his whole personality and career. He doesn’t curse like NC, but he just hates everything.
Isn't functionally Elden Ring = literally a mobile game. Stylized graphics and colours = literally tricking me into having fun, where's the anatomically correct eating? Where's the raytracing?
Other games: - "All the developers did in this game is put pretty colorful lights... to give players the illusion that the game is fun." - "This game is so boring a repetitive" - No online play bad - "Game is overpriced" - Averages a
he's a quite hyperbolic but at least he knows what he likes. I do wish Metacritic would just remove the 0-10 system for users and make it more like steam where it's just recommended or not recommended since people almost never use the numbers in between.
Yeah TH-cam used to have 1-5 stars but eventually changed it to like-dislike since almost every rating was either 1 or 5. I'd assume that Metacritic uses 1-10 just to match with the professional reviews.
Negative reviews are so funny. I once went to google to look at reviews for a mall and there was one guy in all caps lock yelling about his car breaking down (he kept saying ENGINE CAR and it was the funniest thing ever)
This video is a masterpiece. There’s a lot of variety of reviews. The music fits what is happening well. Comedy is well timed. Not to mention the video is free to watch. Best of all, there is a built in multiplayer feature with the chat on the tv. 10/10
Crazy lore update: Yesterday on stream we discovered that OnlyOneHere has grandchildren, meaning that, at the VERY least, they are 40 years old. More likely, they are 55+ years old.
@@yourlocalnerd5981 i saw this comment and had to find it, it was on the hogwarts legacy review: "Edit: I changed my mind. No longer a 3, it's a 1. Right when my grandkid asked me to borrow the game, I just noticed the "Internet Required" label."
dude that just makes this even sadder. I thought this was like some 12 yaer old who was just getting bank rolled by his parents but if this is some middle aged dude who spends his life that way what are you doing dude. EDIT: It's also totally true. A lot of his baldur gates 3 re-review is just him bashing millennials bc according to him they refused to say anything bad about the game. And then he complains about woke culture. And then he rants at meta critic itself asking for reviews to not get deleted. He is def middle aged lmao EDIT 2: OnlyOneHere honestly thinks his reviews mean something lmao. He unironically said that Kirby's Dream Buffet would not have existed without him complaining about Forgotten Land having no multiplayer lmao. I do mean that he thinks Nintendo only started making that game after seeing HIS SPECIFIC REVIEW. This guy never dissapoints.
The OnlyOneHere starter pack: • Call the game a *adjective* steaming pile of garbage. • Call the combat/graphics/story/voice acting/physics/animations either boring and repetitive/trash/horrible/cringeworthy/a joke and leave it at that. • Go off on a tangent completely unrelated to the game. • Call the devs greedy and lazy for not having the most innovative or realistic gameplay possible, or for not having multiplayer. • Buy a game you feel is overpriced (repeat ad nauseam). • Rip the cover art paper into pieces if a character on it expresses emotion.
as a big Xenoblade 2 this is probably the worst thing scene ever put in a video game (I do find it funny how people think the entire game is bad and use the same 3 bad cutscenes though) 14:30
Here's my weird hypothesis: this guy has a vore fetish and this game is not cutting it for him. It sounds batshit insane, but he spends too much time talking about the way and speed Kirby eats things, this guy has to have a special angle on the thing for it to be such an issue for him.
The VA for Pyra went on a Twitter rant about blushy crushy. God, that scene is discomforting, especially with how Pyra and Rex generally interact in XC2
OnlyOneHere IS Metacritic. Many AAA game companies have forgotten how important player experience is. Launching unfinished titles, micro transactions and lazy rehashed mechanics from previous games diminish the game experience which leave a bad taste and prevent players from buying future titles. Allowing patching to be implemented just gave companies the excuse to be lazy and greedy.
I think when the guy mentioned things not happening in "real-time," they meant that thing the game does where the world pauses for a moment when you get a new power? It's a weird thing to complain about though, lol
My mans walked to the edge of FD in smash4 with Mario then boots up Ultimate and picks Mario and walks to the edge of FD. THIS GAME IS IDENTICAL AS THE LAST GAME. I can't breathe over here pls guys help me 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Incoming rant, but I'm confident to call OnlyOneHere objectively the worst Metacritic user based on his consistent "reviews" of scoring 0/10 for most games he supposedly plays and his incessant trademark copy-and-pasting of phrases he does for every example. I've followed this guy for a long time, and aside from what Coney's already highlighted, firstly from what this user's noted in several reviews is that allegedly he's a grandparent who has been gaming since the Atari, which if he hadn't mentioned you'd have thought he was some basement-dweller millennial by his level of maturity (his political views certainly match either demographic when he unironically throws out typical right-wing buzzwords like "woke", "sjw's" etc). When he's not ranting about things that barely relate to the game, he nitpicks to a degree that would make people like Yahtzee or Worth A Buy blush and throws out disparaging short descriptives with often no context to try and give the impression an aspect of the game is worse than it is (like calling the physics of most games "trash" because they don't literally mimic reality, except when he ignores that for a game he likes because double standards). For every sympathetic or reasonable view he might have, he has about five embarrassing ones. Some glaring examples being crunch is good because developers should be making the best game possible (nevermind that people's physical and mental well-being are suffering; only the game matters); thinking devs and critics frequently consult Metacritic and are reading his reviews, to the point he actually influences their decisions; and falsifying or misconstruing dev statements out of context, such as claiming Insomniac Games lied saying Spider-Man PS4 wasn't downgraded just because there's fewer puddles, and that just saying Ratchet and Clank is a PS5 exclusive in marketing therefore means it will never ever come to PC. Other things I've found is that for many games he posts his reviews on, or close to, their launch date, meaning he's probably played very little of the full experience if it's a sizeable example. Also, while he typically reviews all the major game releases, sometimes he'll review a new obscure or lesser known title that might have about a dozen other user reviews; there doesn't seem to be much middle ground with the popularity of games he looks at. What can be taken away from his tirades is that: • Full-priced games should have the quality, content, and detail of something like Red Dead Redemption 2 or GTA V. • If a full-priced game doesn't have multiplayer (regardless of how suitable it would be) it's "half a game" and won't ever be played again, or if it does have multiplayer it must have at least an offline mode minimum, otherwise it will eventually be unplayable when the servers are shut down (you'd think by how he words it this would be a year away at most). • If a game isn't varied or filled to the brim with content, it should be anywhere from free to $20. • Games should strive to be as realistic as possible. Particularly, if a game so much as features a car (drivable, being driven, or stationary), it should react exactly how a car would in any given situation. • A game shouldn't have a stylised or cartoony art style because it just means the developers are lazy. • DLC in all its forms is unacceptable and should have been in the base game at launch. • Racing games seems to be the only ones that have got any real chance of getting at least a half-decent score from him. I think the most shocking thing is the fact he constantly fails to learn his lesson when he (supposedly at least) forks out full-price for a game when he will usually just say he doesn't recommend it at that price. He can't be doing any research into what he buys, or if he does it's the absolute bare minimum. Or perhaps he's that much of an idiot he will pay full price just because he's desperate to review it and say why it's not worth full price. Speaking of which, if by chance he ever plays a game he's already reviewed on another platform, he then posts another review for that example and points out how he's had access to it (like paying for GamePass) and therefore that gives him the right for the additional review, as if he's seeking validation just for this principled act (which is pointless as it can't actually be proven on Metacritic). Edit: the weirdo has now admitted to buying a cross-gen game for each platform just so he can review it twice, simply because he hates that it's also for the previous gen. Ultimately, Metacritic should do us a favour and implement a feature that proves users actually bought the game to see if OOH actually has been (and proves he is actually that much of an idiot), or otherwise just ban the loser. He likes to complain they delete some of his reviews (and he's so obsessed that he has them saved and reposts them when they do), so they should just go all the way.
Xenoblade 2 is my favorite game of all time. The Blushy Crushy cutscene is the worst thing in video game history. The mental gymnastics it takes to defend the good in this game is like purgatory. But I still think it's better than being a Death Stranding or Life is Strange guy Also idk if Coney did see this cutscene live in the end, but at the very fucking least Nia acknowledges the abysmal awfulness of this entire scene. A character within the game is aware of how cringe Tora's shit is in this specific scene, which makes me believe the writers absolutely knew about how cringe it was and are denouncing this "trope" instead. Tora is made to be hateable in fact, so I don't really know if it's that bad. I've seen worse shit in JRPGs and anime, but I'll still shit on this scene both because it's bad and because anything good I'd mention about the game otherwise would not be taken seriously if I didn't
“The mental gymnastics it takes to defend the good in this game is like purgatory” This is literally the perfect description of what it’s like when I try to talk to anyone about this game.
Nia would be cool if she wasnt a cat girl. I'm glad Rex didn't get into Smash, and while I despise their designs, the Aegis are very fun to use and they bring great music to Smash.
@@andymcclurg9916 agreed on the music part but I hate fighting as/against them and watching them while I love their designs (playing the game helps a lot in that regard). They were my most wanted characters and now I hate everything about them in Smash. Sucks but it be like that I guess. Nia is fine really, her being a cat girl is weeb bait and I don't like when she acts straight up more like a cat than her tiger looking blade does, but otherwise she's great (and she's back in 3 so I'm very happy). Cool to hear other people's opinions tho, civilized conversations about this series are a rare and welcomed sight
Oh I remember coney watching the blushy crushy scene, he also watched the one-eye monster scene, the Rex waking up to mythra scene, and the hot spring scene. Chat wanted to pivot so badly...
This guy is apparently a mid-life crisis dad in his 40's. Think about it: racing, golf, skateboarding? Excessively focused on price? And he probably plays all of these games with his drinking buddy he met down at the Sinking Fish pub.
That’s a pretty good theory, but how do you justify a guy in his mid-life crisis taking the time to not only at least try out a bunch of games that aren’t within his interest to then go on to copy-paste some variation of his usual review syntax for every single one?
He said he's a grandparent and has been playing since the Atari, likely putting him past 50, which just makes his fanatical and immature comments even more incredible. I sometimes find it hard to believe that he's not just trolling.
@@SPM0717 In the person's defense, this is probably just how a person in their 50's types when they don't involve themselves in modern culture or internet typing conformities all too much.
How to make your game OnlyOneHere approved: Include cars with realistic physics Don’t be greedy so preferably 20-40 dollars with no DLC Have realistic AI and attention to detail Have lots of minigames and extras to do in the open world Be able to replay missions Have co-op local multiplayer which is available for standard campaign and an extra multiplayer focused which is better if it’s a battle Royale mode
When game has decent graphics: "The game's graphics are a hot steaming pile of garbage." When game has great graphics: "This game only has the graphics to make an illusion that the game is actually fun."
It’s like someone saw a bunch of older AVGN episodes, decided to rip them off, forgot to put jokes in, and gave the Nerd an obsession with multiplayer and sports games, and a case of Dissociative Identity Disorder with the alternate personality being a ripoff of Egoraptor.
I'd love for Coney to analyze various amateur angry reviewers or overly positive reviewers and find the scrouge's their perfect game like he did with OnlyOneHere and the happy harry's their nightmare game
13:55 He's bald under that cap. He's VERY self-conscious about it. He never takes it off. Even in bed. He claims it's part of his "image". But he really is just worried she won't marry him if he takes it off. XD
he usually noted something about the price each time, but I think this was the first time he said something was expensive. The way he used the word extremely implied a comparison to something one would imagine to be more moderate, but they were all the same price nonetheless.
My biggest question about this guy is why is he so obsessed with multiplayer. Seriously who is voluntarily playing game with the guy who hates 80% of games and has been tearing up cover art.😂
A real excerpt from an OnlyOneHere review: "Has anyone else noticed the recent inflation on critic scores lately? Ever since I called these game critics out on their hypocrisy in my TOTK review, many franchises got their scores inflated starting with SF6. This isn't a coincidence, I know you critics read my review. I said that these critics had the audacity to virtue signal over studios crunching, even though they are the main reason why crunch exists, because every studio has to work 100 times harder than Nintendo to get a 90 score on Metacritic. Critics used to crucify games for lack of "innovation" but now a copy/paste Tekken 7 is getting a 90 score. I see what you're doing, you are inflating scores so no one will blame you for the crunch. I don't blame you, the devs had a choice. But let's face it, the only reason why RDR2 and TLOU2 had crunch is because the developers were just trying to please you so they can get 10s and awards. So don't even dare pretend to care about their well-being when you were the main cause of crunch in singleplayer games." I can't even...
Bruh... saying that metroid has no replay value just because it has no multiplayer is completely nonsensical it hurts. The game is FILLED with shit that you can do differently from play through to play through The game incentivizes and rewards the player for replaying the game with ending screens that are locked behind beating it fast, and completion. Also, the game is more polished than anything that ever could've released on GBA. The main reason for why Metroid Dread didn't release on the DS is literally because of hardware limitations because they couldn't make the EMMI (or whatever their equivalent was) work. Just because you didn't bother trying to enjoy the game doesn't mean that the game has nothing to offer. (Yes, I am salty that he called dread an upscaled GBA game. How could you tell?) P.S. I realize that I am incentivizing him with engagement that I probably wouldn't have done otherwise but, I REALLY need to at least say why I think differently, consequences be damned. My man really said that someone who can only enjoy a game if it has racing of some kind is "spitting". OMHG my head hurts. Either way even if this comment is too long for CONEY to give a shit I want to at least try to give an opinion that shows a different point of view. How much of the game did he play anyway? I don't think he made it to the final boss... some things in Dread just can't happen in the GBA either like the parry animations on the bosses. I dunno... maybe I am nitpicking that statement at this point... either way. Enjoy the engagement Coney. See you later. TL;DR no, you're wrong. And here is why.
Glad I'm not the only one who thought that comment he made was a bit dumb. I spent half my life waiting for Dread to come out and as much as I know Coney likes to make dumb takes it honestly just felt disrespectful.
CMON you can't tease me with the blushy crushy heart to heart and NOT show it to me, is it on the VOD, I fuckin love that dumbass cutscene and more people need to be aware of it.
I went to go see what OnlyOneHere has been up to since this video dropped. He reviewed Kirby Dream Buffet and gave it a 2. "I suggested to these developers that they should make a Kirby PvP multiplayer mode, and they actually listened. That's what I like to see, when developers listen to my complaints. $15 isn't a bad price and I guess it's kinda fun. What doesn't sit well with me is that they charged me $15 for this game when I already paid $60 for Kirby and the Forgotten Land. This should have came free with my $60 purchase of Forgotten Land. When I complained about the lack of multiplayer in Returnal and Ghost of Tsushima, those developers also listened to my complaints, but they didn't charge me a single penny. It was a free update, and they even added endless modes to address my complaints concerning replay value. So why couldn't these greedy developers give it to me for free in an update? If the developers are going to charge me $60 for the next Kirby game, I expect the campaign and the PvP multiplayer with my purchase. You better not disappoint me HAL Laboratory. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that these developers addressed my complaints, but I will not tolerate such greedy practices. I recommend you wait for a price drop. P.S. Don't even dare delete this again Metacritic. I doubt this game would have even existed if it weren't for my complaints. That's exactly why reviews exist. Therefore my opinion should be heard. Learn to accept different opinions, rather than silencing." My mans still dropping bangers, facts on facts on facts dude.
l meann, you can replay if you want to speedrun/sequence break l guess, but otherwise it's a pretty linear game. l really liked metroid dread, but l think it's fair to say that it doesnt have much casual replay-value,, for a casual every playthrough would be pretty much the same
I seriously thing this guy is not really a gamer, just someone who bought consoles to look cool. I'd be willing to bet he didn't even play 90% of the games he reviewed and just went: "Is it free? Does it have a car? No? Then I don't even want to look at it!"
"I have not thrown a single PS5 controller this generation after destroying about 30 controllers last gen. Now I punch my door and kick my chair to take out my frustration on these games, so it can't be the controller." If it wasn't for OOH already saying he was a grandparent (among other hints that suggest his apparent age) and so chalking his comments up to simply having serious issues, I'd be certain he was a troll from this comment alone.
This dude is mad funny, because his reviews seem so much like a running joke, but there're just enough clues to make you reasonably certain that he actually just lives like this
Nah he's just a good troll
@@davariantaylor1788 nah he’s sad and has nothing to do
Coney should play Kirby battle royale
Hes still going to this day
“L + huge steaming pile of garbage + no multiplayer” this guy rules
+ greedy devs + no online + no cars + tricked me into having fun
+ I ripped the cover into pieces
+ outrageous price + no replay value + if this was by EA and Ubisoft things would be different
+ the physics are terrible + too expensive
+ Illusion of having fun + Repetitive gameplay
Never ask:
A man his salary,
A woman her age,
OnlyOneHere why their games have no boxart.
"A critic's power lies in the consistency of their voice."
-videogamedunkey
He was then revealed to be the creator of Bubsy 3D
He’s consistent alright
That's why he isn't useless as a critic.
@@Eclipsmon8421 Legitimately true, this guy's opinions are valuable just like Armond White.
@@YellowpowR exactly. If this guy says it’s a flaming piece of garbage then you know to go pick up a copy of it. And oc if he says a game is good that means avoid at all costs.
"There is no Easter Bunny, there is no Tooth Fairy, and there is no MULTIPLAYER."
MEgAmiNd
Good reply but it needed some more PRESENTATION
No multiplayer? 🥺🧐
Lmao
Holy shit this was unironically hilarious
I was not expecting this video to be as funny and entertaining as it was. That being said, there's no replay value, and the greedy developers are charging far too much for what it is. There's nothing to do in the open world, and the multiplayer is laughably bad.
To be fair, it's not an open world game, it was never supposed to be. And the multiplayer is fun, though I wish P2 could also be Kirby.
This is a joke right? The game is not open world, and there is a fair amount of replay value
Guys I shouldn't have to explain this, but it's a joke about the video. Did either of you even watch it?
@@toxic_shr00m yeah, I commented before I finished the video. Might have missed the joke a bit there
@@toxic_shr00m ...
Oops. Sorry about that, I'm a goober for that one.
Crazy how he’s the onlyonehere but still needs local multiplayer
That’s how unbiased he is
From what I can tell, this guy's perfect game:
- Completely free to play. Put as many microtranscations in there as you want though, don't matter to him
- Online multiplayer. Literally no replay value without it
- Cars as the primary gameplay, or at least something with wheels
- Open world with lots of distractions, nothing too open or else it's boring
- Physics and graphics that are either super realistic or very funny, nothing in between
- Nothing that could possibly be construed as 'cringe'
- Slight appeals to nostalgia (pre-GameCube)
- Mechanics that are just complex enough to make him think the game is 'deep', anything actually deep he interprets as 'shallow'
- When all else fails, simply give him a copy of Red Dead Redemption 2. It's full of stuff this guy loves to complain about in other games, but somehow he gave this one a 10
He strikes me as one of those 'video games aren't fun anymore, but not because I'm feeling miserable myself' doomers, except he complains about everything through Metacritic reviews instead of going onto message boards. No way in hell he's ever played any of his 0/10 games. I assume he's at least in his late 30's, possibly older, if the Atari collection was enough for him to drop a 6 and a "Man, those were the days." Weird guy
He actually said he doesn't like online multiplayer only games with MK11.
"0/10 + no cars + it's $60 + not a shooter + not free + online only + no local co-op multiplayer + greedy, lazy, and cheap + overly exaggerated + terrible soundtrack + bad graphics + bad port + reused assets + steaming pile of garbage"
+ woke devs + pronouns
@@papertiger4525 + cringeworthy cover
OnlyOneHere is the kind of guy who saw like 5 old Nostalgia Critic reviews and just made that his whole personality and career. He doesn’t curse like NC, but he just hates everything.
Isn't functionally Elden Ring = literally a mobile game. Stylized graphics and colours = literally tricking me into having fun, where's the anatomically correct eating? Where's the raytracing?
@@mattsmith457 You also forgot the "None of that is fun for me." after talking about the stylised graphics
@@mattsmith457 he gave ER a 0
Other games:
- "All the developers did in this game is put pretty colorful lights... to give players the illusion that the game is fun."
- "This game is so boring a repetitive"
- No online play bad
- "Game is overpriced"
- Averages a
I mean-
Tetris is a puzzle game, it’s supposed to be repetitive, and since Tetris Effect: Reconnected came out, online play is now a thing.
"Cheap and lazy."
"Extremely expensive."
Every review from this guy that isn't a car game.
But Kirby is a car game.
@@KoopaKrump oh yeah lmao
My mans Coney took a random guy's metacritic account and turned it into an entertaining video. This man knows no boundaries.
The content must be found at all costs
Tbh i dont mind looking at metacritic comments as content
This dude has a calculated formula on how he writes his negative reviews
He probably has a google doc of all of these sentences and he just copies and pastes them into his reviews.
That’s what I’m saying!
@@gabrielabrera9966 In the words of OnlyOneHere, he’s too cheap and too lazy to come up with original sentences.
@@CyberHardcore-z7gthere’s no multiplayer on metacritic
he's a quite hyperbolic but at least he knows what he likes. I do wish Metacritic would just remove the 0-10 system for users and make it more like steam where it's just recommended or not recommended since people almost never use the numbers in between.
Yeah TH-cam used to have 1-5 stars but eventually changed it to like-dislike since almost every rating was either 1 or 5. I'd assume that Metacritic uses 1-10 just to match with the professional reviews.
If only from software hadn't been so lazy and they had taken the time and effort to add cars into elden ring, maybe the game would be worth while
th-cam.com/video/MQsp7ozg24c/w-d-xo.html
somewhat relevant, also pretty funny imo
uhh I'm not entirely sure what I can do to prove I'm not a bot
Well there is a car mod
2:29 roasts sonic, uses sonic music immediately. Never change Coney (and editor)
2:19
I can't tell if he actually hates all sonic games or just the fans.
@@coomcharger6105 yes
This man is a personified dunkey bit
HE TOTALLY IS HOLY SHIT
This dude doesn't hate games as a medium - he just hates fiction. He just wants to play 1:1 real life on his TV lmao.
he should play tax filing simulator
Real life is extremely expensive though, there's zero replayability (permadeath always on), and the devs will trick you into having fun.
I would not be surprised if he was an EVE Online player 😂
Negative reviews are so funny. I once went to google to look at reviews for a mall and there was one guy in all caps lock yelling about his car breaking down (he kept saying ENGINE CAR and it was the funniest thing ever)
“Swallowing isn’t in real time”
Bro…. What?!?!
The animations are instant
This video is a masterpiece. There’s a lot of variety of reviews. The music fits what is happening well. Comedy is well timed. Not to mention the video is free to watch. Best of all, there is a built in multiplayer feature with the chat on the tv. 10/10
Having a series where you analyze a single seething reviewer on metacritic would be kind of hilarious.
that would be reusing content. which onlyonehere doesnt like.
Crazy lore update:
Yesterday on stream we discovered that OnlyOneHere has grandchildren, meaning that, at the VERY least, they are 40 years old.
More likely, they are 55+ years old.
No, that can’t be possible. I haven’t watched many Coney streams. Which one was this found out? Because I need to see this
@@yourlocalnerd5981 i saw this comment and had to find it, it was on the hogwarts legacy review:
"Edit: I changed my mind. No longer a 3, it's a 1. Right when my grandkid asked me to borrow the game, I just noticed the "Internet Required" label."
dude that just makes this even sadder. I thought this was like some 12 yaer old who was just getting bank rolled by his parents but if this is some middle aged dude who spends his life that way what are you doing dude.
EDIT: It's also totally true. A lot of his baldur gates 3 re-review is just him bashing millennials bc according to him they refused to say anything bad about the game. And then he complains about woke culture. And then he rants at meta critic itself asking for reviews to not get deleted. He is def middle aged lmao
EDIT 2: OnlyOneHere honestly thinks his reviews mean something lmao. He unironically said that Kirby's Dream Buffet would not have existed without him complaining about Forgotten Land having no multiplayer lmao. I do mean that he thinks Nintendo only started making that game after seeing HIS SPECIFIC REVIEW. This guy never dissapoints.
The OnlyOneHere starter pack:
• Call the game a *adjective* steaming pile of garbage.
• Call the combat/graphics/story/voice acting/physics/animations either boring and repetitive/trash/horrible/cringeworthy/a joke and leave it at that.
• Go off on a tangent completely unrelated to the game.
• Call the devs greedy and lazy for not having the most innovative or realistic gameplay possible, or for not having multiplayer.
• Buy a game you feel is overpriced (repeat ad nauseam).
• Rip the cover art paper into pieces if a character on it expresses emotion.
i think kirby should just be in unreal engine world with photorealistic deer i think THEN kirby will finally be perfect
You forgot to add the Multiplayer PvP.
Nintendo should hire you
Tbf that sounds like it would be hilarious
free to play pvp battle royale rpg with cosmetic shop
Isn't that a game already?
He's now written over 100 more reviews. Latest high score game is still Forza. Amazing
I'm so glad I saw this moment live... I was laughing so hard, pretty much the whole time!
Why does a person who HATES video games, buy, play, and review SO many of them???? Lmao
He hates himself/he’s addicted to the anger/he has little impulse control.
OnlyOneHere might have given death stranding a zero but I'm positive he's going to give the directors cut with multiplayer racing a ten.
as a big Xenoblade 2 this is probably the worst thing scene ever put in a video game
(I do find it funny how people think the entire game is bad and use the same 3 bad cutscenes though)
14:30
Came here from Dougdougs quiz
It seems that Coney DID KNEW THE ANWSER!!!
DIABLO THE CHEATER!!!
17:15
Caught red handed Coney xD
2:04 I think he wanted the animation to be more like Kirby wrapping around the object than the object shoving itself into him as a little cutscene.
Also probably for time to not stop for a bit when you get an ability.
Here's my weird hypothesis: this guy has a vore fetish and this game is not cutting it for him. It sounds batshit insane, but he spends too much time talking about the way and speed Kirby eats things, this guy has to have a special angle on the thing for it to be such an issue for him.
@@KitchouaTemboThat makes too much sense, so i choose to ignore it.
L + ratio + $60 + lazy and greedy devs + steaming pile of garbage + ripped the box art + no multiplayer
The VA for Pyra went on a Twitter rant about blushy crushy. God, that scene is discomforting, especially with how Pyra and Rex generally interact in XC2
yoooo what’d she say
OnlyOneHere IS Metacritic. Many AAA game companies have forgotten how important player experience is. Launching unfinished titles, micro transactions and lazy rehashed mechanics from previous games diminish the game experience which leave a bad taste and prevent players from buying future titles. Allowing patching to be implemented just gave companies the excuse to be lazy and greedy.
17:12
Came here from Doug Doug. Should've studied more.
I think when the guy mentioned things not happening in "real-time," they meant that thing the game does where the world pauses for a moment when you get a new power? It's a weird thing to complain about though, lol
My mans walked to the edge of FD in smash4 with Mario then boots up Ultimate and picks Mario and walks to the edge of FD. THIS GAME IS IDENTICAL AS THE LAST GAME. I can't breathe over here pls guys help me 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I'm so down for MetaCritic User Reviews Reviews. Please do more Coney this was hilarious
Incoming rant, but I'm confident to call OnlyOneHere objectively the worst Metacritic user based on his consistent "reviews" of scoring 0/10 for most games he supposedly plays and his incessant trademark copy-and-pasting of phrases he does for every example. I've followed this guy for a long time, and aside from what Coney's already highlighted, firstly from what this user's noted in several reviews is that allegedly he's a grandparent who has been gaming since the Atari, which if he hadn't mentioned you'd have thought he was some basement-dweller millennial by his level of maturity (his political views certainly match either demographic when he unironically throws out typical right-wing buzzwords like "woke", "sjw's" etc). When he's not ranting about things that barely relate to the game, he nitpicks to a degree that would make people like Yahtzee or Worth A Buy blush and throws out disparaging short descriptives with often no context to try and give the impression an aspect of the game is worse than it is (like calling the physics of most games "trash" because they don't literally mimic reality, except when he ignores that for a game he likes because double standards).
For every sympathetic or reasonable view he might have, he has about five embarrassing ones. Some glaring examples being crunch is good because developers should be making the best game possible (nevermind that people's physical and mental well-being are suffering; only the game matters); thinking devs and critics frequently consult Metacritic and are reading his reviews, to the point he actually influences their decisions; and falsifying or misconstruing dev statements out of context, such as claiming Insomniac Games lied saying Spider-Man PS4 wasn't downgraded just because there's fewer puddles, and that just saying Ratchet and Clank is a PS5 exclusive in marketing therefore means it will never ever come to PC.
Other things I've found is that for many games he posts his reviews on, or close to, their launch date, meaning he's probably played very little of the full experience if it's a sizeable example. Also, while he typically reviews all the major game releases, sometimes he'll review a new obscure or lesser known title that might have about a dozen other user reviews; there doesn't seem to be much middle ground with the popularity of games he looks at.
What can be taken away from his tirades is that:
• Full-priced games should have the quality, content, and detail of something like Red Dead Redemption 2 or GTA V.
• If a full-priced game doesn't have multiplayer (regardless of how suitable it would be) it's "half a game" and won't ever be played again, or if it does have multiplayer it must have at least an offline mode minimum, otherwise it will eventually be unplayable when the servers are shut down (you'd think by how he words it this would be a year away at most).
• If a game isn't varied or filled to the brim with content, it should be anywhere from free to $20.
• Games should strive to be as realistic as possible. Particularly, if a game so much as features a car (drivable, being driven, or stationary), it should react exactly how a car would in any given situation.
• A game shouldn't have a stylised or cartoony art style because it just means the developers are lazy.
• DLC in all its forms is unacceptable and should have been in the base game at launch.
• Racing games seems to be the only ones that have got any real chance of getting at least a half-decent score from him.
I think the most shocking thing is the fact he constantly fails to learn his lesson when he (supposedly at least) forks out full-price for a game when he will usually just say he doesn't recommend it at that price. He can't be doing any research into what he buys, or if he does it's the absolute bare minimum. Or perhaps he's that much of an idiot he will pay full price just because he's desperate to review it and say why it's not worth full price. Speaking of which, if by chance he ever plays a game he's already reviewed on another platform, he then posts another review for that example and points out how he's had access to it (like paying for GamePass) and therefore that gives him the right for the additional review, as if he's seeking validation just for this principled act (which is pointless as it can't actually be proven on Metacritic). Edit: the weirdo has now admitted to buying a cross-gen game for each platform just so he can review it twice, simply because he hates that it's also for the previous gen.
Ultimately, Metacritic should do us a favour and implement a feature that proves users actually bought the game to see if OOH actually has been (and proves he is actually that much of an idiot), or otherwise just ban the loser. He likes to complain they delete some of his reviews (and he's so obsessed that he has them saved and reposts them when they do), so they should just go all the way.
this dude would LOVE rocket league, it clicked when I realized that he likes free to play games / good deals combined with racing
It has below average graphics...
"This game is a hot steaming pile of garbage"
Xenoblade 2 is my favorite game of all time. The Blushy Crushy cutscene is the worst thing in video game history. The mental gymnastics it takes to defend the good in this game is like purgatory. But I still think it's better than being a Death Stranding or Life is Strange guy
Also idk if Coney did see this cutscene live in the end, but at the very fucking least Nia acknowledges the abysmal awfulness of this entire scene. A character within the game is aware of how cringe Tora's shit is in this specific scene, which makes me believe the writers absolutely knew about how cringe it was and are denouncing this "trope" instead. Tora is made to be hateable in fact, so I don't really know if it's that bad. I've seen worse shit in JRPGs and anime, but I'll still shit on this scene both because it's bad and because anything good I'd mention about the game otherwise would not be taken seriously if I didn't
“The mental gymnastics it takes to defend the good in this game is like purgatory”
This is literally the perfect description of what it’s like when I try to talk to anyone about this game.
@@wholesomeslacker it truly is the hardest shit. Also nice Milton pfp
Nia would be cool if she wasnt a cat girl. I'm glad Rex didn't get into Smash, and while I despise their designs, the Aegis are very fun to use and they bring great music to Smash.
@@andymcclurg9916 agreed on the music part but I hate fighting as/against them and watching them while I love their designs (playing the game helps a lot in that regard). They were my most wanted characters and now I hate everything about them in Smash. Sucks but it be like that I guess. Nia is fine really, her being a cat girl is weeb bait and I don't like when she acts straight up more like a cat than her tiger looking blade does, but otherwise she's great (and she's back in 3 so I'm very happy). Cool to hear other people's opinions tho, civilized conversations about this series are a rare and welcomed sight
Oh I remember coney watching the blushy crushy scene, he also watched the one-eye monster scene, the Rex waking up to mythra scene, and the hot spring scene. Chat wanted to pivot so badly...
thank you dougdoug gameshow for the recommendation this is great
0/10 video lazy dev no cars
RIGGED
I'm gonna start calling things I like "biblical" from now on
To answer the question about the Kirby Battle Royale: Kirby Air Ride has a Battle Royale-esque mode
I've checked up on him recently on Metacritic and he now has 10 positive reviews, 15 mixed reviews, and... 163 NEGATIVE REVIEWS...
Can’t believe they put a car in Tears of the Kingdom just for OnlyOneHere
Nicely applied dynamic post-edit, really fits itself into channel aesthetic been clean and easy to digest overall.
Respect to the editors
This guy is apparently a mid-life crisis dad in his 40's. Think about it: racing, golf, skateboarding? Excessively focused on price? And he probably plays all of these games with his drinking buddy he met down at the Sinking Fish pub.
That’s a pretty good theory, but how do you justify a guy in his mid-life crisis taking the time to not only at least try out a bunch of games that aren’t within his interest to then go on to copy-paste some variation of his usual review syntax for every single one?
@@nicholaspeters9919 divorce frees up a lot of time
@@YellowpowR Ooo, good point…
He said he's a grandparent and has been playing since the Atari, likely putting him past 50, which just makes his fanatical and immature comments even more incredible. I sometimes find it hard to believe that he's not just trolling.
@@SPM0717 In the person's defense, this is probably just how a person in their 50's types when they don't involve themselves in modern culture or internet typing conformities all too much.
How to make your game OnlyOneHere approved:
Include cars with realistic physics
Don’t be greedy so preferably 20-40 dollars with no DLC
Have realistic AI and attention to detail
Have lots of minigames and extras to do in the open world
Be able to replay missions
Have co-op local multiplayer which is available for standard campaign and an extra multiplayer focused which is better if it’s a battle Royale mode
When game has decent graphics:
"The game's graphics are a hot steaming pile of garbage."
When game has great graphics:
"This game only has the graphics to make an illusion that the game is actually fun."
I have a feeling this guy hates video games
Lmao
It’s like someone saw a bunch of older AVGN episodes, decided to rip them off, forgot to put jokes in, and gave the Nerd an obsession with multiplayer and sports games, and a case of Dissociative Identity Disorder with the alternate personality being a ripoff of Egoraptor.
I'd love for Coney to analyze various amateur angry reviewers or overly positive reviewers and find the scrouge's their perfect game like he did with OnlyOneHere and the happy harry's their nightmare game
Here from the new DougDoug video, you scrolled past this dude's God of War review and mentioned it while you were listing off his 0/10 reviews lmao
I love coney videos because you never know what you're gonna get. Yesterday guess the thing on reddit, today stalking a single man on metacritic.
The idea of pulling out Life is Strange True Colors to play a couple rounds of foosball online with your friends is the funniest shit I've ever heard
L + 0 + huge steaming pile of garbage + extremely expensive + cheap and lazy developers + no multiplayer + no vehicles
My favourite part of the video is the fact that he says Smash Ultimate copied the previous game when he copies his own reviews
13:55 He's bald under that cap. He's VERY self-conscious about it.
He never takes it off. Even in bed. He claims it's part of his "image". But he really is just worried she won't marry him if he takes it off. XD
7:51 I love that he says metroid is extremely expensive when all of the games so far have been the same price.
He said that about all the other ones too though
he usually noted something about the price each time, but I think this was the first time he said something was expensive. The way he used the word extremely implied a comparison to something one would imagine to be more moderate, but they were all the same price nonetheless.
This is the first intelligent AI making reviews
That actually makes sense.
"It's not a free to play multiplayer car game and has a cringe worthy face on the cover, but I'll give it a shot."
"Steaming pile of garbage"
How could you hate him… literally Kirby :(((
My biggest question about this guy is why is he so obsessed with multiplayer. Seriously who is voluntarily playing game with the guy who hates 80% of games and has been tearing up cover art.😂
A real excerpt from an OnlyOneHere review:
"Has anyone else noticed the recent inflation on critic scores lately? Ever since I called these game critics out on their hypocrisy in my TOTK review, many franchises got their scores inflated starting with SF6. This isn't a coincidence, I know you critics read my review. I said that these critics had the audacity to virtue signal over studios crunching, even though they are the main reason why crunch exists, because every studio has to work 100 times harder than Nintendo to get a 90 score on Metacritic. Critics used to crucify games for lack of "innovation" but now a copy/paste Tekken 7 is getting a 90 score. I see what you're doing, you are inflating scores so no one will blame you for the crunch. I don't blame you, the devs had a choice. But let's face it, the only reason why RDR2 and TLOU2 had crunch is because the developers were just trying to please you so they can get 10s and awards. So don't even dare pretend to care about their well-being when you were the main cause of crunch in singleplayer games."
I can't even...
We should come back to this guy sometime
Bruh... saying that metroid has no replay value just because it has no multiplayer is completely nonsensical it hurts.
The game is FILLED with shit that you can do differently from play through to play through
The game incentivizes and rewards the player for replaying the game with ending screens that are locked behind beating it fast, and completion.
Also, the game is more polished than anything that ever could've released on GBA.
The main reason for why Metroid Dread didn't release on the DS is literally because of hardware limitations because they couldn't make the EMMI (or whatever their equivalent was) work.
Just because you didn't bother trying to enjoy the game doesn't mean that the game has nothing to offer. (Yes, I am salty that he called dread an upscaled GBA game. How could you tell?)
P.S. I realize that I am incentivizing him with engagement that I probably wouldn't have done otherwise but, I REALLY need to at least say why I think differently, consequences be damned.
My man really said that someone who can only enjoy a game if it has racing of some kind is "spitting". OMHG my head hurts. Either way even if this comment is too long for CONEY to give a shit I want to at least try to give an opinion that shows a different point of view.
How much of the game did he play anyway?
I don't think he made it to the final boss... some things in Dread just can't happen in the GBA either like the parry animations on the bosses. I dunno... maybe I am nitpicking that statement at this point... either way. Enjoy the engagement Coney. See you later.
TL;DR no, you're wrong. And here is why.
Glad I'm not the only one who thought that comment he made was a bit dumb. I spent half my life waiting for Dread to come out and as much as I know Coney likes to make dumb takes it honestly just felt disrespectful.
@@swoodmaster0242 thank you for validating me. I don't want to come off as disrespectful in anyway but it also just set me off.
You’re absolutely correct
CMON you can't tease me with the blushy crushy heart to heart and NOT show it to me, is it on the VOD, I fuckin love that dumbass cutscene and more people need to be aware of it.
I went to go see what OnlyOneHere has been up to since this video dropped. He reviewed Kirby Dream Buffet and gave it a 2.
"I suggested to these developers that they should make a Kirby PvP multiplayer mode, and they actually listened. That's what I like to see, when developers listen to my complaints. $15 isn't a bad price and I guess it's kinda fun. What doesn't sit well with me is that they charged me $15 for this game when I already paid $60 for Kirby and the Forgotten Land. This should have came free with my $60 purchase of Forgotten Land. When I complained about the lack of multiplayer in Returnal and Ghost of Tsushima, those developers also listened to my complaints, but they didn't charge me a single penny. It was a free update, and they even added endless modes to address my complaints concerning replay value. So why couldn't these greedy developers give it to me for free in an update?
If the developers are going to charge me $60 for the next Kirby game, I expect the campaign and the PvP multiplayer with my purchase. You better not disappoint me HAL Laboratory. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that these developers addressed my complaints, but I will not tolerate such greedy practices. I recommend you wait for a price drop.
P.S. Don't even dare delete this again Metacritic. I doubt this game would have even existed if it weren't for my complaints. That's exactly why reviews exist. Therefore my opinion should be heard. Learn to accept different opinions, rather than silencing."
My mans still dropping bangers, facts on facts on facts dude.
12:46
nono he's right about this one.
the fact that Avengers has 1 point over METROID D R E A D because it has multiplayer I cant
I was about to rage at the fact Coney didn't like Kirby.. then realized this wasn't his opinion... you win this round
The wedding scene is a call back to the beginning when he said he would of said it then she didn’t like it then she gone ahead and did it
This guy saying Metroid Dread has no replay value.. Bruh, and you agreed Coney ??? Very dissapointed on that one.
l meann, you can replay if you want to speedrun/sequence break l guess, but otherwise it's a pretty linear game. l really liked metroid dread, but l think it's fair to say that it doesnt have much casual replay-value,, for a casual every playthrough would be pretty much the same
Why does he hate Kirby and the Forgotton Land when it has cars? I thought he loves car games
Cause Kirby didnt swallow the car in real-time
"CRINGE BOX ART"
"There was nothing to drive"
"pile of garbage"
"no multiplayer"
"costed 50+"
This video was quite entertaining, however there is almost no replay value.
That dude LEGIT hates happiness. 🤣
i can't believe a single person can hate this much. It's honestly kind of sad
I’ll take him giving Lost Judgement a 2 instead of a 0
I seriously thing this guy is not really a gamer, just someone who bought consoles to look cool. I'd be willing to bet he didn't even play 90% of the games he reviewed and just went: "Is it free? Does it have a car? No? Then I don't even want to look at it!"
11:47 Coney spittin
When the villain has like 4 good points
“I died because the enemies were stronger than me. Bad game”
"I have not thrown a single PS5 controller this generation after destroying about 30 controllers last gen. Now I punch my door and kick my chair to take out my frustration on these games, so it can't be the controller."
If it wasn't for OOH already saying he was a grandparent (among other hints that suggest his apparent age) and so chalking his comments up to simply having serious issues, I'd be certain he was a troll from this comment alone.
Xenoblade rules, but I’ll be the first to admit that Tora is insufferable cringe.
Just checked his metacritic, he gave Baldurs gate 3 a zero and one of the reasons is because he can't open the door in real time
IMMERSION RUINED
HAHAHAAHA 😂
THANK GOD THIS GOT TURNED INTO A VIDEO, THIS WAS SO FUNNY
But... Kirby can become a car :( if only you could turn into a car in real time then maybe he would appreciate it
The doug don't stop
RIGGED
Coming back to this video again, and something just hit me: who is OnlyOneHere playing all this multiplayer with, and do they also do reviews?
Those 11 people don’t know WHAT THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT!
Goddamnit... I got sad when Sonic Runners music started playing around halfway in... Dumb bullshit but I loved that game and the music is great.
Kirby air ride if it had more players in cityscape is literally a br
It’s not plagiarism if you’re copying yourself
For this guy is simple: if i have to pay for this game, is a huge pile of steaming garbage
Not one part of this game felt “lazy” barely any Kirby games feel lazy
Talk about having a bad taste in video games
201 negative, 16 mixed, 10 positive, no F-Zero 99 yet (11/10 probably)
I came here after dogs video where you mentioned only one here and I did not expect this to be the one about him