The missing element in this discussion is loneliness. Loneliness, unsatisfying relationships, rejection, antisocial beliefs... all lead to a state of chronic desparation that most of us solve with our electronic playthings: games, videos, social media temporarily fill the void created by the crippling effects of loneliness. This electronic stimulation has a much greater influence on our behavior than any feelings of pride in work or responsibility to a job or paycheck, even. They automated our workplaces but ruined our personal lives and mental health.
I usually refer to it as dopamine addiction. The reward center of my brain was really screwed up from basically puberty on to the age of 30. Anytime things were difficult or uncomfortable I would turn to porn or video games and suffer the consequences of basically coasting through family obligations, academia, and my career, which led me to stress out and consume more porn and video games. I lost thousands of dollars from the college classes I failed through my negligence and almost lost my marriage because I had no self control. My understanding is that addiction happens through the mid-brain which dispenses dopamine and other reward chemicals when you accomplish tasks. This is also the part of your brain that manages flight or fight, and if you have trained your brain to reward you for doing pointless actions, refraining from doing those actions will ultimately cause your brain to panic and you will be unable to focus until you either succumb or get external support and an exit plan for your addictions. I sobered up in 2018 and seeing what 2020 did to many friends in support groups really disturbed me. For myself I've found an almost bottomless well of motivation and far more purpose in life than I thought possible just by keeping the course and repeating my mantra: Create more than you consume. Thanks for sharing The Deep Life philosophy, I think it is medicine that the world really needs right now.
@@ParhamDoustdar I really appreciate the question. I've written a few responses over the past few weeks but it quickly turns into a novel before I realize I've got too much to say about it all. If you have a more specific question feel free to ask. I'm an open book. As for what worked, finding people in recovery with a similar addiction who were able to offer advice and not judge me when I was struggling. Having a non-judgemental support system who wanted the best for me I could call or confide in when I wanted to act out was crucial because my feelings weren't bottled up anymore. I also rely heavily on a higher power, because through that context there is greater purpose to life than the secular intellectual lens I was living through prior. What didn't work was trying to fix things on my own. Or downplaying the severity of my actions. I needed to adopt an attitude of accountability without shame. I also tried replacing my addiction with other addictions, thinking the consequences of one would be better than the consequences of another, but in the end I was losing twice as much time on either addiction. I also tried to incrementally wean myself off of my addictions by seeking milder stuff. And example of this regarding my pornography addiction I shifted my focus from hardcore porn to swimwear and active wear. This backfired because I didn't quit the harder stuff, I just had learned to fetischize more common things to the point I had to avoid pools and beaches entirely in early recovery because they were far too triggering. I really don't know if any of that helps. I've found that everyone is on their own journey with this, though in many cases there is abundant crossover, so whenever others have offered advice I've taken it where it is applicable, and given it freely because you never know what helps.
The worst is how quickly my brain builds up a tolerance to all these productivity hacks. For example going to a new coffee shop or library might improve my focus for the first day or two, and after that it just becomes a new procrastination space. It’s as if my subconscious is absolutely determined to find a way to get nothing done.
My sense is that getting started is the hard part. It is much easier to keep going. So the thing to do is tell yourself that you are going to concentrate deeply on this important task for 5 mins. You will find it is easy to then keep going.
It's not the work that I feel is purposeless, it's the future. At best the future is hazy and at worst it's hellish. Either way, delayed gratification seems far from guaranteed. (How long before I see the headline that AI has automated all of my marketable skills?) Any long term investment is a tough sell for my brain.
The last 2 minutes is exactly how I am doing it. Context: I am working from home and I also don’t normally prefer a coworking work setup so I can’t really work from those spaces. Here’s what I’ve been trying, if someone finds this in 6 months maybe check back and see if it worked: 1. Do not work from home if you can’t do it. Spend the money like Cal mentioned. I spend my mornings getting things in order ideally without a phone and follow my routine, once I’ve had my lunch at home, I’m out at a cafe I find to be best suited for deep work. 2. Get coffee and get to a 2-3 hour schedule of deep work with a 20 minute walk in between 3. Throw in a whiteboard in your space with every hour accounted for (Personal care, Deep work, Workout sessions, Meals, etc) This helps with a sense of routine and is a UX improvement cause now you have daily clarity and your brain doesn’t actively spend energy planning a fresh day unless there’s a few minor changes. This isn’t a strict schedule so I wouldn’t beat myself up over it but it’s a rough layout to get started with. 4. Force boredom like Cal mentioned. I switch off or leave my phone for 30-60 minutes and just force myself to be bored (Learning to enjoy it) 5. Take regular walks (this could just be me) but I enjoy my 2-3 walks everyday Hope this helps and I’d love to know what y’all have been doing🤝
I don’t work from home and I know I wouldn’t do well in that setting. But your points are extremely applicable and helpful. Thanks for sharing this. ✍️
@@HabitLabPodcast Appreciate it! The funny bit is that I’ve now found an office setting I really love with a whole new role so most of my “work from home processes” are no longer applicable. Nevertheless it helped get through some pretty tough times.
ive found the absolutly most important thing i have done for my dopamine health is to sit in boredom.. Just stay into the wall.. And even stop entertaining the mind .. so you fast from all stimuli.. this works like noting ive ever tried.. And it works fast!
Thanks! Could you elaborate this a little? How long do you sit in boredom before you begin doing something? To fast from all stimuli is incredibly diffucult to me. How did you achieve that? And: "...even stop entertaining the mind" Isn´t that like meditation? I wanna try but don´t know how.
I turned my iPhone into a 'dumb' phone by only enabling the necessary apps using parental controls, then setting a random parental controls password, writing the password down on a piece of paper and hiding it at home. This means, when I am out, my iPhone can only be used for necessary things (maps, banking, phone calls), and if I want to access anything else, I cant, because I can't disable the parental controls because I dont have the password (it's at home). I find this a better solution compared to getting rid of the smartphone and buying a flip phone. Hope this helps ya'll
"Why Can’t I Motivate Myself To Work?" OMG THIS is ME Right now. I struggle literally struggle to get out of bed, get a shower and go to work. It started last year, and its got progressively worse. I'm self employed, and for the last 6 months been living off of my savings, have not taken any jobs. I cannot wait to watch this video, hopefully it fixes me.
1) Decrease the hardness 2) Reduce the hard thing to time block plans so its easier to execute 3) Why are you doing hard stuff, you should know the why The targetted lifestyle 4) Boredom therapy: regular distraction free periods 5) Interval training : timer of focus 6) retrain your brain for longer periods of focus 7) din get the rituals thing
@@CosmicDeejay This wasn't a substitute to the video but rather a summary I wrote for myself Also I have realised that the only way to get work done is to WORK and that's it No videos help
I totally could've written that letter at the beginning. My bread and butter at work is deep problem solving, so this could very well become an existential threat for my career. His suggestions make a lot of sense.
When I sit quietly, there is always a list, ledger, inbox of things I need to be attending to, and caring of. When I ignore these things, and let them pile up, there is no focus or peace or clarity in bigger life plans, and I don't enjoy the day to day grind usually as a result. I noticed that it always bothered me when my bed was messy, so I started making my bed every morning, then I was never bothered or distracted or worried of it ever again. Action is the thing that changes people, thinking is an action, and too much of it without structure can ruin you.
@@tomservo75 You never know wtf you will get in youtube comment section. :D Son of peter seems to be a bit republicanized now a days though and I have no affinity.
Mr Newport is a much-needed antidote to our early 21st-century digital malaise. Thanks for all that you do to bring awareness to this problem, providing your viewers with clear steps to dig out of the pit. Social Media had expertly played me like puppet for 11 years. Embarrassing to admit... Awareness was my first durable step out of it. Deep, sustained work towards worthy projects is where the good life is. It is ok to be bored and digitally unstimulated. JOMO is a very nice sensation (Joy of Missing Out). Ok to leave the smartphone in another room or, dare I suggest, to leave home without it from time-to-time! You will survive and, with some diligence on your part, come to find yourself emancipated from the matrix.
Working from home I always had my work computer right next to my main computer where I would spend a lot of time listening to music, researching things, or playing video games. Inevitably, you get distracted or demotivated to work with your entertainment system sitting right there. What helped me was plugging in my personal PC monitor into my work docking station during the day, thus rendering my personal machine useless for those 8 hours. My work is pretty regulated, our machines are locked down, have to access everything via VPN, and I wouldn't do anything "personal" related on that machine. Essentially, I created an ecosystem where I have to work or I have nothing to do. Some days I'm not motivated to do the work, but I find when there's no other options available to me, I just get started on things and build up the momentum, and all of the sudden I'm deep in the work within 30-minutes or so and very focused.
That is spot on! I use to do that with my laptop, only problem is, now I work from a PC and its my complete station, entertainment, research, video editing(work) and content creation. I end up watching youtube and looking up fun stuff, while eating at my desk till I am tired then I hit the couch or bed and crash. its killing me hard productively, Oh I use to play a online game called Apex Legends, that basically destroyed my day job and was killing my online biz, I cut that, but my brain has just moved over to social media, movies. I am currently in the fight for my self. Massive dopamine issues, being ADD doesn't help. I found doing work in 10-45min bursts with reward or switching to another task helps. I trick my mind into believing its only a 10 min then you can time waste, 10min each day is better then 0. I end up doing more once in the flow, sometimes I don't.
What you're saying makes a lot of sense. We're constantly getting pulled in so many directions by the things we do and watch either on tv or our phones. Our brains dwell on these things for a long time even if it was just a short 30-second thing online. We're mentally exhausted hence we can't focus or get motivated. The dopamine sickness is true; we do not feel like spending too much time working on anything and nothing feels like it's worth it anyway when truth is we have to focus and spend time on tasks that are of higher value.
very well explained. I got addicted to reels few seconds on Instagram and YT, face book My content is educative but still enertainment, travel, comedy etc. its addicting as it gives immediate happiness trying to reduce by going for walk
It's the guilt what kills me, I have a good job but i want to keep learning and getting better but i find myself just finding whatever excuse to do nothing at all
I feel guilty at the end of day for my lack of productivity. But when I make a list of what I have completed, I realize I am actually productive but my brain is telling the opposite. I believe this happens when I skip lunch and or lack of sleep. This is one of many things that I do to sabotage myself.
Me too. It's been going on for years. I have a part time job, but if I'm not at work, I struggle to bring myself to do much else except look at my phone or TH-cam. I'll do light chores because I have to, though this is bare minimum. I want to work full time but somehow just can't bring myself to do it because I fear not having the capacity the manage the load. I only work 20 hours a week, yet I feel tired as if I worked a full week. I definitely believe this happened due to covid lockdown as before I was much more driven. I'm accountable though and only I can change my circumstances.
@@Rosielovesmusic I don't know if this helps but two words that really help me are 'Go outside'. And even when I feel like 'ah what difference could that make, I KNOW it always helps somehow...and it never fails.' It just breaks the circuit in your brain and gets you moving and breathing fresh air. It's like a reset. Also in general, for me being more physical in general is the biggest thing that helps my work ethic. You just feel more on top of things. I know it's hard to start if you're in a rut, but it's like a dominoe effect of good vibes to your brain :)
One thing that helps me (once I've motivated enough to list the tasks I need to do and break them down as small as I can) is to write the number 1 simplest obstacle to getting that task done right next to it. That way I know exactly what's holding me back from getting it done. Then I just have to clear the obstacle. It *can* be hard to identify both the task and the obstacle in their simplest form sometimes, but with some practice it gets easier fast. Especially as MOST of the time it's something ridiculous or mundane like "buy a pen", "clear off everything from my office desk" (hint: doesn't matter where the stuff goes...just put it in a box or something) or "respond to that email." On emails, once I convince myself that the substance of the email doesn't really matter as much as responding to it, it becomes much easier...and usually the substance turns out to be sufficient because I managed to get *started* on the email enough to reply with something coherent.
I appreciate this because it sounds like he really gets it. Not someone who made it and forgot the struggle of getting there just telling us to work harder like most people on youtube.
Rituals and also creating "work" spaces, at home. For example: many people say they've made up a room -or space, in their home, to be their "work office". So when they go sit at that "desk", it helps their mind to go into "work" mode. Also: try to stick to "office hours". Resist the urge to sleep in (I work from home, but set my alarm to the actual office start time) and also resist the urge to work over-time (because sometimes it's easy to just carry on working, once you've gotten into the flow). But force yourself to stop when it's normal "going home time" (obviously unless there's something urgent that needs to be finished). Because that will also help you to "switch out of work mentality" and into "off-time mentality". I like to go for a jog then, and take a shower. That's physical rituals that almost serves as a "line" for me to help switch out off "work". Which will help you to have a balanced life, (i.e. switch off and have recreational time) which will then help you the next morning to NOT sleep in but to want to go into "work mode" again when it's time to start.
Thank you. These kinda video are often only about describing the problem or blaming modernity or young people but you actually gives a few step I can try to implement.
Sooo helpful today. Also for me If its not too cold a quick dip in the pool is a great way to start work with the reward of getting out of the cold to a comfortable work desk and be wide awake and more. The advice on ritualizing or formalizing the tasks is to make them habitual and not elective.
You, Sir, are a genius! I am linking this video to my very successful wife who nonetheless struggles with this type of thing right now. I stumbled upon that "long term goal" method back when I was 15, and that is the single biggest factor in helping me excel academically, professionally, and build the excellent life and family I have today.
this literally described me the past few years. both personally and professionally. i blamed it for end of career burnout (45 years non-stop) so i retired a few months ago. failing health and family tragedy did not help either. but now i get mired down in doing what should be fun stuff and used to enjoy.
I sadly have like stage 3 dopamine sickness,when I am home to get myself to do what I want but don't feel like doing (which is usually art, workout or chores) I usually put on headphones , an initial D megamix for energy, then a video of productivity like this while I do it Now it can't be too inticing where I would want to take notes or I'll be doing that. I'll also set a timer I can go for 30 mins uninterupted than an hour usually afterwards my brain feels fried so I rest and get back to it. It is NOT healthy, but so much fun not gonna lie. I am trying to clean up my media diet, it's been about a month where I realize how far I've fallen off and I'm trying to put back the pieces I recognize the importance of boredom and am doing exercises for it but being a kid who was grounded a lot I still have that tendency to find SOMETHING to do rather than what I want to I'm a tinkerer so there is always work to be done but I need to lessen the requirements to start. I've done the detoxes read the shallows, deep work, and am currently going to read Slow Productivity for when my life picks back up (which is why I fell off in the first place) idk why I wrote this I guess i'm confessing my sins lol.
I was trying to use my lunch break to go into a forest and bike ride. Doesn't have to be a full hour but that boosted my dopamine while working from home. I can see fish and birds and it's great. The downside could be mosquitoes and cicada noise but I can muscle through the stings.
Tip: get a smart watch that tells you notifications and lets you take calls. It worked amazingly for me. I can leave my phone charging in the other room and feel fine. The watch is limited as to what you can do on it but you don't have the separation anxiety. I got mine for £20 on Amazon.
YT knew I needed this b/c I can't watch more than five minutes of a video before switching to something else. Definitely suffering from some dopamine sickness - thank you Cal for putting a name to it and providing some solutions
Regarding dopamine sickness - App companies research & engineer their apps to be as addictive as possible for users. The common person can’t help but be addicted to it
VERY helpful! I have all these. Thank you for the practical solutions. The way you describe the need to look at the phone 3:45, describes how my brain has been working my whole life: this, over here, that, what’s this, over there, that, now this again… they said it’s ad/hd, but now everyone is experiencing it with the smartphones. I keep my phone plugged in more than half the day. I’m a stay at home-schooling mom. But we can not afford rent and bills anymore. So I need to get to working from home as well. I have set up an eBay corner, to get started. I just keep fighting myself to get started. For years! Just before this video popped up, I said “!!Who am I fighting, anyway?!! I want to do this! Why can I not get myself to get going?!? I’m going to remember again, to do just a little bit, and for just 20 minutes. I could do almost anything if I know it’s over soon, and it’s painless really. Okay. Phone plugged in, getting motivated… 🤔 I could keep making this comment longer. I have deep procrastination as a coping mechanism, it was a default for never getting anything I asked for growing up. I just put off my heart. Anything that could make me feel better, I can do or have that in the future. Putting off the heart. Its long lasting side effects I’m experiencing are what you call deep procrastination. I have become proficient at stalling on what I want, to maintain the peace of the group. Deep procrastination. That sounds like something I could work on. Because I’m exhibiting right now. 😅thank you for this insight. Thank you YT for continuing to help me do better! Actually planning something for the near future is something that has always helped me stay motivated! Thank you for reminding me of that!!!
There's good in this video. However I'll just add another cause of this problem with low motivation. Sometimes it can be lowered dopamine resulting from immune inflammation in the brain (ask me how I know😀) that leads to this problem with motivation. There has been quite a bit of research into this phenomenon and the experts refer to it as "sickness behaviour syndrome." Some people are prone to experiencing depression and/or loss of motivation while sick or undergoing immune stimulation. One of the ways in which they study this is by giving interferon to mice and then studying their "sickness behaviour." Various cytokines are implicated and some of the downstream effects lower serotonin and dopamine in sensitive individuals. Unfortunately chronic infections and problems with certain toxins can lead to a protracted version of this phenomenon. Long Covid and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome may be exactly this sort of thing. It's very tough stuff. It's so severe for some that interferon therapy for certain infections or cancer is not an option.
What made me realize how bad I have this, is that your suggested remedies seemed to shock me at just the thought of doing them. I do so many of the things you mention to a T.
First comment! Cal I love your videos, looking forward to read your books, I have one in my bookshelf :3 Thank you for sharing awesome advice, you are helping a lot of people!
Thank you so much!! I needed this, it`s even perfect that it`s only 10 minutes and so on point, with solutions and everything. Amazing! Now I guess I have some work to do.
I realised I blurred the lines between work and the other aspects of my life to the point where I ended up doing nothing effectively and even less enjoyably. Creating a healthy separation between them, along with logotherapy and reconnecting with activities that until not so long ago were satisfying and meaningful to me is something I'm in the process of doing to reverse that damage
I’m currently stuck in both. How can I overcome the deep procrastination against trying to change my career situation when I don’t have and have never really had a strong interest in anything that a career could be made out of? How do I, who has never been great at planning or obeying self-initiated control, overcome the dopamine issue when my current painfully boring job still requires me to utilize my phone throughout the day?
As a native of the lower peninsula of Michigan, I burst out laughing when Cal posed the idea of moving to the upper peninsula of Michigan to do remote work. I thought he was going to say Thailand or some other tropical country!
Before we all had cell phones, I was told that it was going to be a marketing tool for companies to collect data on the user. And the cell phone would be given out free of charge.
I love your work . I’m a life coach and really wish to transition people off the addictions . A mba in computer science lost his job because of these junk apps .
This is very informative, some great tools, I learned in this segment. Plus some of them are just common sense, when you go for a walk in the sun is shining on you, it does wonders for your mind and your body. That’s not to mention the change of environment, that’s why it’s so hard for some people to do renovation work on their own house. When you get home, that’s the last thing you want to do, plus you get tired of seeing the same environment. Those same people can work on someone else’s house with no problem whatsoever!
My phone is a constant distraction and my work seems boring in comparison. I wouldn't use my phone at work in the office but working from home without people around it seems to be an alternative form of dopamine.
Great content, concise but rich. Follow your work since Deep Work (my no. 1 self-help book for the current times): Are you sure you are at the right academic place within an IT department? ;-) ... keep up the great work and greeting from Europe!
By YouSum Live 00:01:44 Deep procrastination: Inability to start essential tasks. 00:02:01 Dopamine sickness: Overwhelmed by constant distractions. 00:04:05 Reduce task complexity and establish control systems. 00:05:50 Simplify obligations to manage workload effectively. 00:06:29 Connect work to a meaningful long-term vision. 00:08:01 Implement boredom therapy to combat distractions. 00:09:04 Interval training for prolonged focus intervals. 00:09:45 Establish distinct work locations and rituals for focus. By YouSum Live
Instead of renting office space, you could also just go to the library to work. They typically have "quiet study rooms" which would allow you to work in a distraction free environment since you have to basically be quiet in these rooms, meaning you can't have your phone making noise or listening or watching anything that makes noise on your computer. Just be sure to go to these places without headphones so that you don't give in to the urge to plug headphones in to your computer to start watching youtube videos.
Dopamine numbed/saturated. What could help is to radically eliminate all internet distraction for a long while... to force the brain to to have work as the only source of dopamine.
I realize I am better when I am micro managed and have people looking over me and checking on me. Fortunately or Unfortunately I am a sole proprietor so I work for myself and have to keep myself accountable which is going horribly but that's ok... I'm finding different ways to get things into a more serious groove and connect with others who are also doing solo work with no boss to report to
My problem is that I met all my goals and now need to find new ones. But it's not as simple as just finding a new goal. At my age, purpose becomes a driving factor. What goals will give me a sense of purpose? This may be really simple to answer for some but it isn't for me.
I recognized that my whole professional life was a thing to numb my depression … now my career hit a plateau, flow became a luxury and work is not purposeful enough anymore to beat my depression. Replaced my intrinsical motivation for flow, to numb my pain with extrinsic motivation for earning money … which makes me numb. But the wrong way. Flow is basically gone. And work caused mental and bodily harm during covid. And now I can’t find a way to numb myself anymore. Work even makes me more sick. Leading me to more procrastination. With the final destination amygdala hijack … all the time. Just came from a business trip. Wasted 2 days with managerial tomfoolery. Hoped that the plane would crash … but. I am alive. What to do now?
Can feel every word you have written. I treat my profession as a diversion from real life as well. I'm searching for a way to be content without working all the time.
I was today years old when I just stood in front of the fridge and had the epiphany that EVERY success, not just my professional live, was something to numb my pain … and then the cold knife to a bloodstream felt like it could be a nice idea …
This all has to do with survival and the fact we live in a society with maximum comfort and no real threats. You take the same people and give them a baby, a massive financial opportunity or something that will trigger the need to react to survive or obtain a massive prize and motivations occurs. There's really nothing deeper
How does this work for ADHD. Pre-pandemic I had issues but not as bad as they are now and that further increased my anxiety. I hate it and I am completely stuck in fight/flight/freeze - procrastination state - even with having taken proper medications. What do you recommend for someone like me. 🙂?
From someone that is also having a daily ADHD struggle, some things that i noticed to make a difference and lessen the impact of my personal ADHD issues: - meditate daily, even if its one time a day for 10 mins (there are some meditation techniques that work for people with ADHD. I found one that works for which is just staring at a lit candle for 10 mins while focusing on my breathing. - Cold morning showers - Working out in morning, and if not working out, go outside and go for a walk. - Make a to-do list/plan/schedule for the next day and read in the morning, before starting with work or doing something. 3/10 i manage to stick to it most time i dont but its defenitely helpfull and its okay to fail - Any Social media, youtube, internet tv exposure (especially in the first few hours of the day) is like a wind blowing away all your good intentions One last thing i would recommend (i dont like promoting shit), Watch podcasts and videos from Huberman podcast and DR K from Healthy Gamer.
What happens when that motivating image becomes more and more unlikely? Increasing costs of living without inflation-adjusted salaries, unfavorable political/legal advancements in my plan's area... Could you speak to the question while including the possibility that one's motivating image may have already taken a blow and/or becomes less potent as time goes on?
I am a PhD student and I have the same work from home issue, I always seem to get more done when I get ready and leave for the library. #RadicalRituals
Great insights of what could be happening at this time for most of us post-C~~V~~DD! Amazing how we are not being helped by our government with this important aspect of health. But when it came to SARS-CV-2, they made sure to push hard! How is society/economy going to rebound with people who suffer from this debilitation! We do not get advice on this important mental health issue that is affecting all of us, nor do we get any advice on our health pertaining to eating right, exercise, hydration and sleep!
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I love how Cal really gets how we feel and the struggles we have and doesn't just dismiss them.
That's why his ideas are worth listening to - he is one of us, and gives us practicals on how to go about.
@@cesarborja1064 👍
Agreed. He's not an elitist and doesn't write off our real feelings and struggles.
Who is the "we" you are representing?
Why would he? dopamine sickness casued by media/internet addiction is so pervasive. Everyone knows it, and I'm, no better than the next guy.
The missing element in this discussion is loneliness. Loneliness, unsatisfying relationships, rejection, antisocial beliefs... all lead to a state of chronic desparation that most of us solve with our electronic playthings: games, videos, social media temporarily fill the void created by the crippling effects of loneliness. This electronic stimulation has a much greater influence on our behavior than any feelings of pride in work or responsibility to a job or paycheck, even. They automated our workplaces but ruined our personal lives and mental health.
Mission accomplished
I'm just so happy he explains the science behind this , because procrastination can feel like a personal flaw but it's actually externally triggered.
Wow "personal flaw" part is so true. It feels just like that.
But its not true and thats refreshing.😅
I usually refer to it as dopamine addiction. The reward center of my brain was really screwed up from basically puberty on to the age of 30. Anytime things were difficult or uncomfortable I would turn to porn or video games and suffer the consequences of basically coasting through family obligations, academia, and my career, which led me to stress out and consume more porn and video games.
I lost thousands of dollars from the college classes I failed through my negligence and almost lost my marriage because I had no self control.
My understanding is that addiction happens through the mid-brain which dispenses dopamine and other reward chemicals when you accomplish tasks. This is also the part of your brain that manages flight or fight, and if you have trained your brain to reward you for doing pointless actions, refraining from doing those actions will ultimately cause your brain to panic and you will be unable to focus until you either succumb or get external support and an exit plan for your addictions.
I sobered up in 2018 and seeing what 2020 did to many friends in support groups really disturbed me. For myself I've found an almost bottomless well of motivation and far more purpose in life than I thought possible just by keeping the course and repeating my mantra: Create more than you consume.
Thanks for sharing The Deep Life philosophy, I think it is medicine that the world really needs right now.
I'd love more details about your journey in 2018. What kinds of "external help" did you try? What worked? What didn't?
"Create more than you consume" is a game changer. Thanks for sharing your experience.
@@ParhamDoustdar I really appreciate the question. I've written a few responses over the past few weeks but it quickly turns into a novel before I realize I've got too much to say about it all. If you have a more specific question feel free to ask. I'm an open book.
As for what worked, finding people in recovery with a similar addiction who were able to offer advice and not judge me when I was struggling. Having a non-judgemental support system who wanted the best for me I could call or confide in when I wanted to act out was crucial because my feelings weren't bottled up anymore.
I also rely heavily on a higher power, because through that context there is greater purpose to life than the secular intellectual lens I was living through prior.
What didn't work was trying to fix things on my own. Or downplaying the severity of my actions. I needed to adopt an attitude of accountability without shame.
I also tried replacing my addiction with other addictions, thinking the consequences of one would be better than the consequences of another, but in the end I was losing twice as much time on either addiction.
I also tried to incrementally wean myself off of my addictions by seeking milder stuff. And example of this regarding my pornography addiction I shifted my focus from hardcore porn to swimwear and active wear. This backfired because I didn't quit the harder stuff, I just had learned to fetischize more common things to the point I had to avoid pools and beaches entirely in early recovery because they were far too triggering.
I really don't know if any of that helps. I've found that everyone is on their own journey with this, though in many cases there is abundant crossover, so whenever others have offered advice I've taken it where it is applicable, and given it freely because you never know what helps.
Great mantra.
The worst is how quickly my brain builds up a tolerance to all these productivity hacks. For example going to a new coffee shop or library might improve my focus for the first day or two, and after that it just becomes a new procrastination space. It’s as if my subconscious is absolutely determined to find a way to get nothing done.
My sense is that getting started is the hard part. It is much easier to keep going. So the thing to do is tell yourself that you are going to concentrate deeply on this important task for 5 mins. You will find it is easy to then keep going.
I think you need to find purpose, as he said in 6:26
because our work is utterly meaningless hence it fails to hold our attention
It's not the work that I feel is purposeless, it's the future. At best the future is hazy and at worst it's hellish. Either way, delayed gratification seems far from guaranteed. (How long before I see the headline that AI has automated all of my marketable skills?) Any long term investment is a tough sell for my brain.
Have you tried not going out at all? That in itself is the procrastination.
The last 2 minutes is exactly how I am doing it.
Context: I am working from home and I also don’t normally prefer a coworking work setup so I can’t really work from those spaces.
Here’s what I’ve been trying, if someone finds this in 6 months maybe check back and see if it worked:
1. Do not work from home if you can’t do it. Spend the money like Cal mentioned. I spend my mornings getting things in order ideally without a phone and follow my routine, once I’ve had my lunch at home, I’m out at a cafe I find to be best suited for deep work.
2. Get coffee and get to a 2-3 hour schedule of deep work with a 20 minute walk in between
3. Throw in a whiteboard in your space with every hour accounted for (Personal care, Deep work, Workout sessions, Meals, etc) This helps with a sense of routine and is a UX improvement cause now you have daily clarity and your brain doesn’t actively spend energy planning a fresh day unless there’s a few minor changes. This isn’t a strict schedule so I wouldn’t beat myself up over it but it’s a rough layout to get started with.
4. Force boredom like Cal mentioned. I switch off or leave my phone for 30-60 minutes and just force myself to be bored (Learning to enjoy it)
5. Take regular walks (this could just be me) but I enjoy my 2-3 walks everyday
Hope this helps and I’d love to know what y’all have been doing🤝
I don’t work from home and I know I wouldn’t do well in that setting. But your points are extremely applicable and helpful. Thanks for sharing this. ✍️
@@HabitLabPodcast Appreciate it! The funny bit is that I’ve now found an office setting I really love with a whole new role so most of my “work from home processes” are no longer applicable.
Nevertheless it helped get through some pretty tough times.
Hope it’s going well!
@Nomaddone123 how’s it going?
walk really helps I have been doing it from long time
ive found the absolutly most important thing i have done for my dopamine health is to sit in boredom.. Just stay into the wall.. And even stop entertaining the mind .. so you fast from all stimuli.. this works like noting ive ever tried.. And it works fast!
@henrikkarl25 For how long?
@@buzzcutbiene2211 9-5
Thanks! Could you elaborate this a little? How long do you sit in boredom before you begin doing something? To fast from all stimuli is incredibly diffucult to me. How did you achieve that? And: "...even stop entertaining the mind" Isn´t that like meditation? I wanna try but don´t know how.
@@LEGOKRASS He can not answer. He is busy staring into the wall ;)
@@buzzcutbiene2211 🤣🤣🤣
Deep procrastination was quite incisive! When you don’t understand how your work adds meaning to your life it can be extremely de-motivating.
I turned my iPhone into a 'dumb' phone by only enabling the necessary apps using parental controls, then setting a random parental controls password, writing the password down on a piece of paper and hiding it at home. This means, when I am out, my iPhone can only be used for necessary things (maps, banking, phone calls), and if I want to access anything else, I cant, because I can't disable the parental controls because I dont have the password (it's at home). I find this a better solution compared to getting rid of the smartphone and buying a flip phone. Hope this helps ya'll
I just might try this thank you.
Ah yes, necessary apps like TH-cam are unblocked. That makes sense.
Wow. Thank you!
😮
@@donkeyfacepunch What? They didn't say they had it unblocked
Cal you need to do a course or series on overcoming dopamine sickness. It's way more common and difficult than people realise
"Why Can’t I Motivate Myself To Work?" OMG THIS is ME Right now. I struggle literally struggle to get out of bed, get a shower and go to work. It started last year, and its got progressively worse. I'm self employed, and for the last 6 months been living off of my savings, have not taken any jobs. I cannot wait to watch this video, hopefully it fixes me.
Watching this while playing with my phone, when I'm supposed to be working!
lo siento
1) Decrease the hardness
2) Reduce the hard thing to time block plans so its easier to execute
3) Why are you doing hard stuff, you should know the why
The targetted lifestyle
4) Boredom therapy: regular distraction free periods
5) Interval training : timer of focus
6) retrain your brain for longer periods of focus
7) din get the rituals thing
If you can't even sit through a 12 minute video then you're not really putting forward an effort to fix this issue
@@CosmicDeejay This wasn't a substitute to the video but rather a summary I wrote for myself
Also I have realised that the only way to get work done is to WORK and that's it
No videos help
Thanks for your summary
So grateful I got away from all that nonsense last year. It was life changing.
Cal is like the really smart eldest cousin but you can also relate so much to whatever is he says and is really down to earth. Cheers man!
I totally could've written that letter at the beginning. My bread and butter at work is deep problem solving, so this could very well become an existential threat for my career. His suggestions make a lot of sense.
Setting up rituals to get into work is something we don’t think about, but can make such a difference.
this is great. i just got a kitchen timer thing, like an old school wind up one
When I sit quietly, there is always a list, ledger, inbox of things I need to be attending to, and caring of. When I ignore these things, and let them pile up, there is no focus or peace or clarity in bigger life plans, and I don't enjoy the day to day grind usually as a result. I noticed that it always bothered me when my bed was messy, so I started making my bed every morning, then I was never bothered or distracted or worried of it ever again. Action is the thing that changes people, thinking is an action, and too much of it without structure can ruin you.
Nice to hear from you Dr. Peterson :D
@@tomservo75 You never know wtf you will get in youtube comment section. :D Son of peter seems to be a bit republicanized now a days though and I have no affinity.
Mr Newport is a much-needed antidote to our early 21st-century digital malaise. Thanks for all that you do to bring awareness to this problem, providing your viewers with clear steps to dig out of the pit. Social Media had expertly played me like puppet for 11 years. Embarrassing to admit... Awareness was my first durable step out of it. Deep, sustained work towards worthy projects is where the good life is. It is ok to be bored and digitally unstimulated. JOMO is a very nice sensation (Joy of Missing Out). Ok to leave the smartphone in another room or, dare I suggest, to leave home without it from time-to-time! You will survive and, with some diligence on your part, come to find yourself emancipated from the matrix.
Working from home I always had my work computer right next to my main computer where I would spend a lot of time listening to music, researching things, or playing video games. Inevitably, you get distracted or demotivated to work with your entertainment system sitting right there. What helped me was plugging in my personal PC monitor into my work docking station during the day, thus rendering my personal machine useless for those 8 hours. My work is pretty regulated, our machines are locked down, have to access everything via VPN, and I wouldn't do anything "personal" related on that machine. Essentially, I created an ecosystem where I have to work or I have nothing to do. Some days I'm not motivated to do the work, but I find when there's no other options available to me, I just get started on things and build up the momentum, and all of the sudden I'm deep in the work within 30-minutes or so and very focused.
What about your phone? That's another distraction when working from home.
That is spot on! I use to do that with my laptop, only problem is, now I work from a PC and its my complete station, entertainment, research, video editing(work) and content creation. I end up watching youtube and looking up fun stuff, while eating at my desk till I am tired then I hit the couch or bed and crash. its killing me hard productively, Oh I use to play a online game called Apex Legends, that basically destroyed my day job and was killing my online biz, I cut that, but my brain has just moved over to social media, movies. I am currently in the fight for my self. Massive dopamine issues, being ADD doesn't help. I found doing work in 10-45min bursts with reward or switching to another task helps. I trick my mind into believing its only a 10 min then you can time waste, 10min each day is better then 0. I end up doing more once in the flow, sometimes I don't.
What you're saying makes a lot of sense. We're constantly getting pulled in so many directions by the things we do and watch either on tv or our phones. Our brains dwell on these things for a long time even if it was just a short 30-second thing online. We're mentally exhausted hence we can't focus or get motivated. The dopamine sickness is true; we do not feel like spending too much time working on anything and nothing feels like it's worth it anyway when truth is we have to focus and spend time on tasks that are of higher value.
very well explained. I got addicted to reels few seconds on Instagram and YT, face book
My content is educative but still enertainment, travel, comedy etc. its addicting as it gives immediate happiness
trying to reduce by going for walk
It's the guilt what kills me, I have a good job but i want to keep learning and getting better but i find myself just finding whatever excuse to do nothing at all
This!
I feel guilty at the end of day for my lack of productivity. But when I make a list of what I have completed, I realize I am actually productive but my brain is telling the opposite. I believe this happens when I skip lunch and or lack of sleep. This is one of many things that I do to sabotage myself.
Me too. It's been going on for years. I have a part time job, but if I'm not at work, I struggle to bring myself to do much else except look at my phone or TH-cam. I'll do light chores because I have to, though this is bare minimum. I want to work full time but somehow just can't bring myself to do it because I fear not having the capacity the manage the load. I only work 20 hours a week, yet I feel tired as if I worked a full week. I definitely believe this happened due to covid lockdown as before I was much more driven. I'm accountable though and only I can change my circumstances.
@@Rosielovesmusic You've answered your own problem in the second sentence. Ditch looking at your phone and you will be golden.
@@Rosielovesmusic I don't know if this helps but two words that really help me are 'Go outside'. And even when I feel like 'ah what difference could that make, I KNOW it always helps somehow...and it never fails.' It just breaks the circuit in your brain and gets you moving and breathing fresh air. It's like a reset.
Also in general, for me being more physical in general is the biggest thing that helps my work ethic. You just feel more on top of things.
I know it's hard to start if you're in a rut, but it's like a dominoe effect of good vibes to your brain :)
One thing that helps me (once I've motivated enough to list the tasks I need to do and break them down as small as I can) is to write the number 1 simplest obstacle to getting that task done right next to it. That way I know exactly what's holding me back from getting it done. Then I just have to clear the obstacle. It *can* be hard to identify both the task and the obstacle in their simplest form sometimes, but with some practice it gets easier fast. Especially as MOST of the time it's something ridiculous or mundane like "buy a pen", "clear off everything from my office desk" (hint: doesn't matter where the stuff goes...just put it in a box or something) or "respond to that email." On emails, once I convince myself that the substance of the email doesn't really matter as much as responding to it, it becomes much easier...and usually the substance turns out to be sufficient because I managed to get *started* on the email enough to reply with something coherent.
Simple and effective...thanks.
I appreciate this because it sounds like he really gets it. Not someone who made it and forgot the struggle of getting there just telling us to work harder like most people on youtube.
Thank you for this Cal Newport, these solutions are eye opening. You are doing a great job
What advice from this video did you implement and what results have you seen?
Rituals and also creating "work" spaces, at home. For example: many people say they've made up a room -or space, in their home, to be their "work office". So when they go sit at that "desk", it helps their mind to go into "work" mode. Also: try to stick to "office hours". Resist the urge to sleep in (I work from home, but set my alarm to the actual office start time) and also resist the urge to work over-time (because sometimes it's easy to just carry on working, once you've gotten into the flow). But force yourself to stop when it's normal "going home time" (obviously unless there's something urgent that needs to be finished). Because that will also help you to "switch out of work mentality" and into "off-time mentality". I like to go for a jog then, and take a shower. That's physical rituals that almost serves as a "line" for me to help switch out off "work". Which will help you to have a balanced life, (i.e. switch off and have recreational time) which will then help you the next morning to NOT sleep in but to want to go into "work mode" again when it's time to start.
THIS VIDEO JUST HAS SO MUCH INFORMATION IN 11 MINUTE! YOUR EACH LINE HAS A NEW THING THANKS MY BUDDY!
Thank you. These kinda video are often only about describing the problem or blaming modernity or young people but you actually gives a few step I can try to implement.
First I was asking a lot of questions, then I was looking for answers, now I am just taking notes. Less passive input, more active output.
I reduced my screen time by over 70% by just disabling the automatic connection of my iPhone to wi fi. The content connectivity is the problem.
Im dopamine sick!
Sooo helpful today. Also for me If its not too cold a quick dip in the pool is a great way to start work with the reward of getting out of the cold to a comfortable work desk and be wide awake and more. The advice on ritualizing or formalizing the tasks is to make them habitual and not elective.
You, Sir, are a genius! I am linking this video to my very successful wife who nonetheless struggles with this type of thing right now. I stumbled upon that "long term goal" method back when I was 15, and that is the single biggest factor in helping me excel academically, professionally, and build the excellent life and family I have today.
Very similar to the remedies for improving executive (dys)function in those with ADHD.
this literally described me the past few years. both personally and professionally. i blamed it for end of career burnout (45 years non-stop) so i retired a few months ago. failing health and family tragedy did not help either. but now i get mired down in doing what should be fun stuff and used to enjoy.
Wow, this question is what I've felt multiple times over the past few weeks. "Deep procrastination" is a cool concept.
I sadly have like stage 3 dopamine sickness,when I am home to get myself to do what I want but don't feel like doing (which is usually art, workout or chores) I usually put on headphones , an initial D megamix for energy, then a video of productivity like this while I do it Now it can't be too inticing where I would want to take notes or I'll be doing that. I'll also set a timer I can go for 30 mins uninterupted than an hour usually afterwards my brain feels fried so I rest and get back to it. It is NOT healthy, but so much fun not gonna lie. I am trying to clean up my media diet, it's been about a month where I realize how far I've fallen off and I'm trying to put back the pieces I recognize the importance of boredom and am doing exercises for it but being a kid who was grounded a lot I still have that tendency to find SOMETHING to do rather than what I want to I'm a tinkerer so there is always work to be done but I need to lessen the requirements to start. I've done the detoxes read the shallows, deep work, and am currently going to read Slow Productivity for when my life picks back up (which is why I fell off in the first place) idk why I wrote this I guess i'm confessing my sins lol.
Appreciate the UP shout-out!
I'm glad I found this video...I haven't been motivated lately...
I was trying to use my lunch break to go into a forest and bike ride. Doesn't have to be a full hour but that boosted my dopamine while working from home. I can see fish and birds and it's great. The downside could be mosquitoes and cicada noise but I can muscle through the stings.
Tip: get a smart watch that tells you notifications and lets you take calls. It worked amazingly for me. I can leave my phone charging in the other room and feel fine. The watch is limited as to what you can do on it but you don't have the separation anxiety. I got mine for £20 on Amazon.
this generation is soft as fuk. your ancestors stormed Normandy and you get "separation anxiety" when your phone is in the other room.
YT knew I needed this b/c I can't watch more than five minutes of a video before switching to something else. Definitely suffering from some dopamine sickness - thank you Cal for putting a name to it and providing some solutions
which one of cal's books goes into the dopamine sickness and its solutions such as setting timers etc?
I think that what Cal calls ‘dopamine sickness’ is often refered to as ‘dopamine defficiency’ in case you want to look more into this.
Regarding dopamine sickness - App companies research & engineer their apps to be as addictive as possible for users. The common person can’t help but be addicted to it
VERY helpful! I have all these. Thank you for the practical solutions. The way you describe the need to look at the phone 3:45, describes how my brain has been working my whole life: this, over here, that, what’s this, over there, that, now this again… they said it’s ad/hd, but now everyone is experiencing it with the smartphones. I keep my phone plugged in more than half the day. I’m a stay at home-schooling mom. But we can not afford rent and bills anymore. So I need to get to working from home as well. I have set up an eBay corner, to get started. I just keep fighting myself to get started. For years! Just before this video popped up, I said “!!Who am I fighting, anyway?!! I want to do this! Why can I not get myself to get going?!? I’m going to remember again, to do just a little bit, and for just 20 minutes. I could do almost anything if I know it’s over soon, and it’s painless really. Okay. Phone plugged in, getting motivated… 🤔 I could keep making this comment longer. I have deep procrastination as a coping mechanism, it was a default for never getting anything I asked for growing up. I just put off my heart. Anything that could make me feel better, I can do or have that in the future. Putting off the heart. Its long lasting side effects I’m experiencing are what you call deep procrastination. I have become proficient at stalling on what I want, to maintain the peace of the group. Deep procrastination. That sounds like something I could work on. Because I’m exhibiting right now. 😅thank you for this insight. Thank you YT for continuing to help me do better! Actually planning something for the near future is something that has always helped me stay motivated! Thank you for reminding me of that!!!
There's good in this video. However I'll just add another cause of this problem with low motivation. Sometimes it can be lowered dopamine resulting from immune inflammation in the brain (ask me how I know😀) that leads to this problem with motivation. There has been quite a bit of research into this phenomenon and the experts refer to it as "sickness behaviour syndrome." Some people are prone to experiencing depression and/or loss of motivation while sick or undergoing immune stimulation. One of the ways in which they study this is by giving interferon to mice and then studying their "sickness behaviour." Various cytokines are implicated and some of the downstream effects lower serotonin and dopamine in sensitive individuals. Unfortunately chronic infections and problems with certain toxins can lead to a protracted version of this phenomenon. Long Covid and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome may be exactly this sort of thing. It's very tough stuff. It's so severe for some that interferon therapy for certain infections or cancer is not an option.
Cal is so great
What made me realize how bad I have this, is that your suggested remedies seemed to shock me at just the thought of doing them. I do so many of the things you mention to a T.
Thank you .. this is helpful
This is so true it hurts!!!! Love this content, as always!!
For sure can relate. Outstanding adice.
This video was incredible, thank you Cal
My take away, connect what you are doing at work to a bigger , positive vision.
First comment! Cal I love your videos, looking forward to read your books, I have one in my bookshelf :3 Thank you for sharing awesome advice, you are helping a lot of people!
Thank you so much!!
I needed this, it`s even perfect that it`s only 10 minutes and so on point, with solutions and everything. Amazing!
Now I guess I have some work to do.
I realised I blurred the lines between work and the other aspects of my life to the point where I ended up doing nothing effectively and even less enjoyably. Creating a healthy separation between them, along with logotherapy and reconnecting with activities that until not so long ago were satisfying and meaningful to me is something I'm in the process of doing to reverse that damage
Love your stuff Cal, the world today certainly is in need of knowledge like "deep procrastination" and "dopamine sickness"
Peace and Blessings
B.
I’m currently stuck in both. How can I overcome the deep procrastination against trying to change my career situation when I don’t have and have never really had a strong interest in anything that a career could be made out of? How do I, who has never been great at planning or obeying self-initiated control, overcome the dopamine issue when my current painfully boring job still requires me to utilize my phone throughout the day?
As a native of the lower peninsula of Michigan, I burst out laughing when Cal posed the idea of moving to the upper peninsula of Michigan to do remote work. I thought he was going to say Thailand or some other tropical country!
Before we all had cell phones, I was told that it was going to be a marketing tool for companies to collect data on the user. And the cell phone would be given out free of charge.
Priceless info.. thank you!
I love your work . I’m a life coach and really wish to transition people off the addictions . A mba in computer science lost his job because of these junk apps .
Great advice Cal. And so much relatable problem.
What advice from cal have you implemented, and what results have you seen? Please share.
This is very informative, some great tools, I learned in this segment. Plus some of them are just common sense, when you go for a walk in the sun is shining on you, it does wonders for your mind and your body.
That’s not to mention the change of environment, that’s why it’s so hard for some people to do renovation work on their own house. When you get home, that’s the last thing you want to do, plus you get tired of seeing the same environment. Those same people can work on someone else’s house with no problem whatsoever!
Thank you very much ❤
My phone is a constant distraction and my work seems boring in comparison. I wouldn't use my phone at work in the office but working from home without people around it seems to be an alternative form of dopamine.
I just looked up at my absolute disaster of a home office and realised why its been so hard for me to get work done :-D . Time for a clean up
Thank you so much
Great content, concise but rich. Follow your work since Deep Work (my no. 1 self-help book for the current times): Are you sure you are at the right academic place within an IT department? ;-) ... keep up the great work and greeting from Europe!
Ahh this was so helpful! Just found you today from the minimalists podcast. Thank you!! 🙏
For almost all of human history, if you didn't work you didn't eat. Pretty good motivation we don't really have anymore.
yeah the primary cause of whatever this bs 'deep procrastination' is not knowing why do we live on this forsaken planet
By YouSum Live
00:01:44 Deep procrastination: Inability to start essential tasks.
00:02:01 Dopamine sickness: Overwhelmed by constant distractions.
00:04:05 Reduce task complexity and establish control systems.
00:05:50 Simplify obligations to manage workload effectively.
00:06:29 Connect work to a meaningful long-term vision.
00:08:01 Implement boredom therapy to combat distractions.
00:09:04 Interval training for prolonged focus intervals.
00:09:45 Establish distinct work locations and rituals for focus.
By YouSum Live
I think it will really help me. The implementation will be hard but at least got the plan.
This video is perfect length. Please make small videos liek this ❤️
Instead of renting office space, you could also just go to the library to work. They typically have "quiet study rooms" which would allow you to work in a distraction free environment since you have to basically be quiet in these rooms, meaning you can't have your phone making noise or listening or watching anything that makes noise on your computer. Just be sure to go to these places without headphones so that you don't give in to the urge to plug headphones in to your computer to start watching youtube videos.
nah.. i will finish listening to this podcast later!!!
Thank you very much for this informative video and useful piecees of advice!
‘Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing.’ -- Luke 10.40-42
Dopamine numbed/saturated.
What could help is to radically eliminate all internet distraction for a long while... to force the brain to to have work as the only source of dopamine.
I realize I am better when I am micro managed and have people looking over me and checking on me. Fortunately or Unfortunately I am a sole proprietor so I work for myself and have to keep myself accountable which is going horribly but that's ok... I'm finding different ways to get things into a more serious groove and connect with others who are also doing solo work with no boss to report to
You’re reading this while listening to the clip, aren’t you?
Maaaaybe
whilst browsing PH yes
Damnit
Nah but I’ll read it later, there’s still time
Nope.. I paused at 0:03 and went straight to comments..
Don't think I'll watch this.
The comments themselves was enough.
watching this to induce dopamine sickness
Solid advice.
Wow this is so me right now
Thank you for sharing your insights. Is there a way to get these questions in Spotify
My problem is that I met all my goals and now need to find new ones. But it's not as simple as just finding a new goal. At my age, purpose becomes a driving factor. What goals will give me a sense of purpose? This may be really simple to answer for some but it isn't for me.
I many places you would hear 'service to others' is what provides purpose.
This is a great response, Cal.
I recognized that my whole professional life was a thing to numb my depression … now my career hit a plateau, flow became a luxury and work is not purposeful enough anymore to beat my depression. Replaced my intrinsical motivation for flow, to numb my pain with extrinsic motivation for earning money … which makes me numb. But the wrong way. Flow is basically gone. And work caused mental and bodily harm during covid. And now I can’t find a way to numb myself anymore. Work even makes me more sick. Leading me to more procrastination. With the final destination amygdala hijack … all the time. Just came from a business trip. Wasted 2 days with managerial tomfoolery. Hoped that the plane would crash … but. I am alive. What to do now?
Can feel every word you have written. I treat my profession as a diversion from real life as well. I'm searching for a way to be content without working all the time.
I was today years old when I just stood in front of the fridge and had the epiphany that EVERY success, not just my professional live, was something to numb my pain … and then the cold knife to a bloodstream felt like it could be a nice idea …
wow this was incredibly helpful. thank you
Can you cut this into shorter clips? Thanks
This all has to do with survival and the fact we live in a society with maximum comfort and no real threats. You take the same people and give them a baby, a massive financial opportunity or something that will trigger the need to react to survive or obtain a massive prize and motivations occurs. There's really nothing deeper
How does this work for ADHD. Pre-pandemic I had issues but not as bad as they are now and that further increased my anxiety. I hate it and I am completely stuck in fight/flight/freeze - procrastination state - even with having taken proper medications. What do you recommend for someone like me. 🙂?
From someone that is also having a daily ADHD struggle, some things that i noticed to make a difference and lessen the impact of my personal ADHD issues:
- meditate daily, even if its one time a day for 10 mins (there are some meditation techniques that work for people with ADHD. I found one that works for which is just staring at a lit candle for 10 mins while focusing on my breathing.
- Cold morning showers
- Working out in morning, and if not working out, go outside and go for a walk.
- Make a to-do list/plan/schedule for the next day and read in the morning, before starting with work or doing something. 3/10 i manage to stick to it most time i dont but its defenitely helpfull and its okay to fail
- Any Social media, youtube, internet tv exposure (especially in the first few hours of the day) is like a wind blowing away all your good intentions
One last thing i would recommend (i dont like promoting shit), Watch podcasts and videos from Huberman podcast and DR K from Healthy Gamer.
What happens when that motivating image becomes more and more unlikely? Increasing costs of living without inflation-adjusted salaries, unfavorable political/legal advancements in my plan's area... Could you speak to the question while including the possibility that one's motivating image may have already taken a blow and/or becomes less potent as time goes on?
This is some great advice!
I am a PhD student and I have the same work from home issue, I always seem to get more done when I get ready and leave for the library. #RadicalRituals
Some recent work on retiring by Teresa Amabile sheds more light on this subject than this. Fun.
All good points. Strange not to mention the possibility of ADHD (which will be linked to dopamine response issues too).
Maybe he didn't mention it for a reason.
Great insights of what could be happening at this time for most of us post-C~~V~~DD! Amazing how we are not being helped by our government with this important aspect of health. But when it came to SARS-CV-2, they made sure to push hard! How is society/economy going to rebound with people who suffer from this debilitation! We do not get advice on this important mental health issue that is affecting all of us, nor do we get any advice on our health pertaining to eating right, exercise, hydration and sleep!