Best advice that has WORKED is; corral similar objects into containers (hairbrushhes), and SET A TIMER for 10 minutes and do the task for only ten minutes!
It has taken me awhile to realize that the household is only managed. It’s never completed. And that’s because we are alive. And that is a beautiful thing.
On days when I feel really weak, I just say to myself “ just go put 10 things in the dishwasher “. Or. “ just go clean one toilet”. Then I sit down and rest. Maybe twenty minutes later I can do 10 more dishes or put a load in the washer. I take tiny, baby steps and don’t beat myself up about it.
I have CFS along with Fibromyalgia, a therapist said to me, “on a bad day when all you can do is stay under the duvet, you have 2 jobs you must do - one is breath in and one is breath out”. I felt so validated that a therapist recognised that there are bad days, it made me not only breath in and out but while under the duvet I would plan things I felt I could accomplish that day, I.e go to the toilet and also try to clean it while I was there, wash my hands and look at the sink and decide to spray it with cleaner so that the next time I went to the toilet I would clean the sink, but only if I could. In this way of tiny steps I could accomplish some things.
I love this! What a great therapist you have. I love how you have figured out how you can do things in pieces. I’m going to implement that during my own hard days. I think it will be very encouraging. Thanks!
I also have Fibromyalgia along with daily migraine. I do something similar. I try to never waste a step. Before leaving a room I will grab items that don't belong. Some days are so bad that I am only able to take the items so far. I know when I pass the items next time I can pick them up and take them farther. Another thing I do is while in the kitchen before I wah my hands I take care of trash, anything dirty that takes little effort. That way I'm not constantly washing my hands. When my kiddos were young I had them come see me after their chores before starting their homeschooling curriculum. I would either give them one quick chore I had noticed needing done or give them a number. The number, let's say I told them 10...that meant they needed to walk around the main floor and tidy up 10 things. I have 3 kiddos so this really helped. Loved the video!
TH-cam Adrenal Fatigue or CFS or fibromyalgia under Dr Berg, Dr. Eckberg and other natural/functional doctors on TH-cam and you will get some much-needed help outside of your regular medical doctors advice which is usually pharmaceutical drugs because that's how they are taught to manage illness whereas natural health doctors are taught to heal health conditions with foods, herbs, supplements and lifestyle changes. You will get so much more information from a functional doctor
I enjoy cleaning my house. I'm so thankful for all of the wonderful things I have and get to enjoy, and cleaning is a reminder to be grateful as I take care of my things 🙏 ❤
yes I remember feeling this way too, but criticism from others bc overwhelmed with other responsibilities (very similar to the author of this book actually) made me really lose that joy
So sorry you go through that sometimes. It takes work to get yourself to the point where you don’t care about it. I came with some baggage from growing up. I constantly heard things like “what will the neighbors think?” I’ve been detangling myself from that and from some of the overly critical demanding standards I lived with. One baby step at a time, right?
It used to bother me when I got behind on cleaning the house...One day a friend, who did certain cleaning things on specific days of the week, told me that if she didn't have time or get to it on that day, she didn't do it the next day, it would get done the next week on the designated day.... Later she also stated that if she didn't clean for 10 days it didn't mean she was 10 days behind pointing out that, for example, dusting the house would take the same amount of time if it was dusted daily or once every 10 days...it was a light bulb moment for me......I no longer feel the pressure I once felt b/c I was behind...I know I can clean my bathroom, including mopping the floors and the baseboards in 30 mins or less no matter how long it's been since I last cleaned it. Things like piled up laundry are a bit different b/c it piles up and the hamper overflows. And a filthy floor will take a little longer to clean than one that has a few days dirt..same for greasy stove tops...it's easier and quicker to wipe them up after each meal if you've used them. One thing I do is allot an amount of time to get a job done...if I don't I'll spend more time than is necessary to do it......working against the clock is a challenge and is energizing. If I'm really sick, I rest...there is very little that must be done housework wise that can't wait a day or two or three. I quit hating cleaning when I reframed my thinking which changed my attitude toward cleaning. I'd always think/complain to myself "I have to clean'...I'd focus on that. Then I got cancer. And cleaning took the back seat..I was afraid and scared and oh how I wished that I didn't have cancer and was willing to do anything to survive it. And that's when I started saying to myself "oh goody, I get to clean the house today" or whatever the cleaning task was. Once I got well the words were kind of hollow b/c now everything was back to normal...But I kept on framing it that way. And guess what...I learned to love being able to do the chore. I found ways to make it easier, more efficient and even fun..Seriously. Gratefulness and thankfulness go along way...when we check our attitude it is often we will find we've got an attitude problem..a 'woe is me' problem. And that is when we start seeing ourselves as a victim. If we play the victim we will find ourselves in bondage. And we will stay in bondage until we realize it, reject the lies and confront ourselves. Every thought we have tends toward life or death. When we condemn ourselves, believing we are worthless, lazy, etc that's not from God...It's Satan who wants to destroy us. And once we realize that we become aware that what Christ said is true: As a man thinketh, in his heart so is he'. What we think reveals what we believe and when we change our thinking which changes what we believe, the process of doing that will transform us and all cleaning, chores, etc will become less burdensome. We'll still get tired, but we won't be stressed which is a whole lot better for our body.
There is so much wisdom in your comment! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences with us. I truly appreciate it. It’s such a good reminder of what’s most important.
I changed my attitude about cleaning by playing hymns and singing while doing housework. I also thank God for the beautiful dishes I have and how privileged I am to be the good steward of said items. At the very least set a timer for 15 minutes. I am a cancer survivor with a spinal condition so I struggle. Gratitude works wonders. ❤
This book changed my life. I became disabled after my cancer diagnosis. I used to effortlessly keep a spotless house and then I stopped having both the energy and the physical strength to clean to that level. Focusing on keeping my spaces functional rather than spotless has improved my mental health as well as the functionality of my home.
I do things now, so that Future Me can be grateful for the efforts Past Me put forth. I have thought before : " ohhh, I really don't want to fold my laundry right now, but I have the time right now, so I better just do it for the benefit of Future Me." Then, when the time comes, I go to my drawer and pull out clean, folded clothing and thank my Past Self for taking the time to care. It's really all just an act of self- care to myself- (past, present and future!!)❤☺️
You're so jolly, down to earth, realistic and lovely. Not everyone grows up with wise older women to turn to, so channels like this are a real blessing. Thank you so much for sharing about KC Davies book, but also talking honestly about the fact sometimes these things are hard because they are hard, not because we are deficient.
New subscriber🙋🏾♀️ This content resonates with me. I'm a 58 y.o. neurodivergent who struggles to keep up with domestics. The *_only_* chore I do without fail is laundry because folding and putting away clean laundry gives me unfettered joy 😹 I love the term 'care tasks'. Thank you for sharing this. It makes me feel better inside.🙏🏾
I'm so glad it has helped! It's cool that you have something that makes you feel that way. Doing laundry is nice for me because I enjoy knowing that I made life a little easier for my husband. :-)
This is the first video of yours I have seen. Somewhere during the first half of the video I thought to myself “This woman’s demeanor is so endearing. I wonder if she’s a believer?” Then you said you follow Christ and I thought “I knew it!” Thank you so much for these thoughts sister! I looked over your channel and have subscribed. I can’t wait to dive into more of your videos. ❤
I know I've commented before but simply have to say it again: It is so refreshing to hear the actual "truth" about maintaining the home for "real" people. It is very demoralizing to click on one video after another looking for real solutions to our challenge, and getting another video saying how "this" system (regardless of which it is) is *the* solution and works for absolutely everyone since it is so adaptable and then goes on to make ridiculous claims.
Also, listening to a 20 something or 30 something years old who lives in a new or newer home is not my reality. I'm 64 years old, still workinf a 40 hour week outside the house, living in a home built in 1920. Not as easy to clean!
@laurieme9611 This is so true. The younger girls are very talented, but are at such a different stage of life than we are. It’s so nice to hear from women who relate to my experience.
I am so grateful to have found your channel! Finally, what I have been dealing with for years is explained and addressed with helpful and meaningful steps to take to get on the other side of what has been a living hell for me and surely for others as well. If I tried to find all the words to tell you how much this means to me, I'd be in tears and a blubbering mess for rest of the morning but instead I'm getting up and going to do what I can today, and do my best not to compare myself to others, etc. I find I downplay A LOT and I am going to do my best to stop doing that to myself and apologizing. No one in my world truly gets it when I tell them my energy just STOPS all of a sudden, my brain is done and I can't do anything else for the rest of the day/evening. Constant interruptions, physically challenging tasks and chaotic drama or stress make it come on faster. The struggle is REAL! You are a brave lady for sharing all of this, putting your own life's foibles and struggles out there to help others. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul! Subscribed!!
Thank you so much for sharing this with us! It means so much to me to hear that the video was helpful to you. It’s very encouraging to me. If you haven’t yet, I highly recommend that you watch last week’s DOT Method. In it, I share a method my cognitive therapist taught me to manage my energy so I can take better care of myself. One of the best benefits is that it has given me a language to communicate to my family how I am feeling that they can understand. They have become more supportive because everyone wants me to be in the “green” as much as possible and they know what’s helpful to me and what’s not. Take care of yourself. You deserve it!
Personalizing my Homemaking feels better than routines, though a master checklist of when I last did something would probably help with certain tasks. I 👍🏻 the self-care mindset 100%! Checking in with myself is so helpful! I like variety, visual serenity, cleared areas, and have more aspirations than time/energy to accomplish them, and am entranced with finding ways to design my home for less housework. Creating rhythms around how I like to operate = matching/coordinated bins and containers repurposed over nearly 3 decades, favoring laundry chores on a daily basis and folding by morning light, decluttering to decrease effort of the old stash and-dash, and massive simplification of eating to ketovore and focus on staying hydrated. Sometimes I indulge in folding socks and underwear, sometimes I don’t. Marie Kondo’s idea of dealing with ALL the things in a category works better for some things than others, and definitely NOT in the order that works for her! It is pleasant to do things that are purely aesthetic, when too tired to do other things 😁. I also enjoy a nice drive to a donation drop location for the same reason (but not in the raging heat of summer). My errand rhythms change with the seasons, for sure! I love videos like yours, and the contributions of the commenters - I learn so much! Being honest with myself about my ability to do the yard work is finally happening. Harder is accepting that I just don’t want to do it!!!
This is so very wonderful. You're doing so many things we can learn from and your attitude towards it and your life is inspiration to me. I'm grateful that you're here and have shared with us. "Harder is accepting that I just don't want to do it!!!" I could have said that. :-)
I only make an ACCOMPLISHED list every day,write everything I did that day and I feel so much better than seeing what I hadn't. Even on days I dont want to.before I know it I have quite a few listed.Walk away still feeling pretty good about what I had done😊
This is such a good idea. I can see it would be particularly helpful during those times when it is hard to do things and you start thinking you haven’t done a thing. But if you made a list like this, you’d probably surprise yourself at how much you’d done because we tend to overlook so many things. I think I’ll try doing this. Thanks!
I listen to this audiobook on Libby every few months. It's a short listen, but it's incredibly packed with helpful advice and it helps me feel more grounded every time.
One thing I’ve gotten in the habit of doing is making a list of anything I need to do that day. From making the bed to taking my meds. Some days it may 5 small things and then some days more. But, I mark off items as I do them & it makes me feel accomplished. If I don’t get to it all I don’t beat myself up about it because sometimes life just gets in the way. Thank you for sharing your journey! You are amazing!
You have such a great attitude! I should make a little list like that. I did once, but got out of the habit. It does feel good checking off the items. I have to have tiny tasks on days when I'm not feeling good, but it would be good to notice that I'm doing them. Thanks!
I loved when you said that so many will tell you, "This system is great! If it's not working for you, then either you're not really doing it or there's something wrong with you.". I literally used to feel this way; I believed them and was convinced that there must be something wrong with me if "everyone" else seems to find this the solution to all the problems I was having but I just can't seem to hack it. Without going into detail, I just cannot, simply cannot, clean my entire house, floors, change linen, etc in one hour...yes, even if I try to do it superficially and only do the main areas of the floors. And I actually had someone who was doing a video series tell me, that if I am not really serious about this and don't really want to do it, then maybe I shouldn't watch her videos. She was right about only one part of that sentence, the ending!
....I am a former Professional Organizer/ Housekeeper....and I read your Comment, and I completely " got it " .... the other part of your Comment, about " cleaning your home in an hour " ...THAT is not attainable, even superficially... How does that seem reasonable...to " clean your house in an hour "? A more realistic approach is doing o n e room a day...depending on the amount that needs done. An hour to ckean the Bathroom.....still feeling ambitious.? .. Then do another small task. I h a v e watched the several Creators that want us to believe that " Yes ! You CAN clean your Home in a hour !" ( she's well - known, I wont mention her Name ) ..I even Commented on that Channel, that I do not find that attainable, and it is a " stress creator "... I had to also ponder "the w h y " when creating a Video wuth that kind of Content....it seems " not as encouraging as it is made out to be " ...if you understand my meaning. ..it seems dis- empowering in a sense. 🤔 Your sentence about being told that ' if you aren't really serious about this, and don't really want to do it ,then maybe you shouldn't be watching her Videos..." I WAS FLOORED. ..! WOW. I was shaking my head , since n o t every " system " being Shown Out Here in TH-cam Cleaning / De- clutter Land " is a One - size fits all Proposition " ...I've even stated as such in Comments, on Certain Channels... .. the whole " De- clutter Thing " has reached epidemic proportion... I'm not interested in getting rid of my Books.. my Hobby Items ... you get the idea. I don't believe one needs to be a Minimalist to have a clean, tidy Home.. Now, releasing things that you TRULY don't need, OR NEVER USE. ..that is a different thing . When I watch a few of the Channels about all this .. I take it all with a Grain of Salt...because, we are all different. We need to understand " our own Rythmn " ...as she stated here in this Video. ..I have long subscribed to that " Rythmn " because it is beneficial... That makes more sense than thinking you " are Less Than " after watching various " Cleaning Channels:. " that are telling you that you CAN do all the Homecaring ( that's my Term for it. Because you are Caring for your Home ) ..in an Hour ..That is nonsense. I had This particular Video come up in my Feed and I decided to watch it and I am so glad I did. ..... This lovely woman is the voice of reason amidst all the " Cleaning and Decluttering Channels " that are way over the top ...and you know which ones I mean.....lol.. ~Blessings 🙏🏻
@@TowardsASimpleLife...I loved your Reply to her Comment, I was floored as well, when I read that someone actuallystated that to her. ...; And trust me, I am older.I am Old School....I am not offended easily .. but that ....that seemed totally inappropriate to say that to a Viewer. ! And ,I am now a New Subscriber.
I have tried sooo many systems....I have found there are nuggets of value in them all but none are a perfect fit for me....I agree there needs to be embracing the good enough and that no matter what you do there will be times things are more chaotic than usual bc you're sick, tired, depressed, grieving, stressed, or distracted...at the moment things are mostly tidy and organized with a few ADHD piles of IDK what to do with this yet piles, and my floors are gross, and my back is still healing from an injury, so I'll dustmop most of the dog hair etc at some point today and mopping can wait. It's a constant dance for me, managing mental health and physical health and environment and tasks and errands, and maintaining relationships etc... the only effective way I've found is asking myself what am I up to doing right now? Sometimes that's a lot, sometimes it's not much, and either way has to be okay bc nothing is gained from beating myself down bc the laundry sat too long or the dishes didn't get done. Sometimes I have to love myself through a day of Netflix in my pajamas and try again tomorrow. Love to all in the struggle.🤗
Thank you so much for sharing this book! I was mentally nodding my head a lot as you talked about your takeaways. I am sorry that you are struggling with a chronic illness and yet you are turning that into lemonade with your TH-cam channel encouraging others that have life challenges. I am putting a hold at the library for this book. Just wish I had heard of it early but will consider this God’s perfect timing. I struggle with low energy without a diagnosis…I’ve tried several of those encourager’s books and apps and I do get discouraged that they haven’t worked for me. But I do a little here and there when I can. Thank you again for sharing your journey. ❤
So glad you heard it now! Have you seen last week’s video about the DOTS Method? In it, I teach the method that my cognitive therapist taught me for managing my energy and taking better care of myself. It has really helped me a lot. I hope it can help you too. It’s not the usual kind of thing you read about in books. I learned about it when I was seeing him for my Long Covid.
Hi, I think the only thing for me in the run through of jobs at the beginning of the video is, I put the laundry in the machine first as it is then working while I am doing something else. I am the same with the organised enough, there is a shelf or a basket for whatever and if it's there that's good enough. I knew one lady who, if someone was dropping in and she was short on time, do a quick tidy, if she needed to dust the obvious, then spray furniture polish in the room and it smells as if she was on top of things. Love her for that, and the honesty. Thanks for common sense approach, it's so much more like peoples real lives.
I recently heard that it's a good idea to be as organized as you need to be, but not MORE organized than you need to be. I thought that was interesting. Thanks...good video.
Oh, I’m so glad to hear this. I do a lot of praying that God will lead me to topics that will help others. He knows so much more than I do. I couldn’t do this without Him.
Neat thing about cleaning the junk drawer is reminding me of what is in there. Now I can remember where random things are. Junk drawers always get “Junked up” for me. I give up making a junk drawer looking nice.
I love your down to earth style and your realistic way of looking at things . I heard someone say once that being organized means “ you can find something when you need it”.. thank you for this video! I like your style!
What a great video! I don’t have a lot of time (or motivation) to read books like this, despite the often valuable advice, so being able to listen to someone go over the main themes of a book and share their thoughts and experience is exactly my cup of tea. Not to mention the fact that the themes discussed are so relevant to my life as a mid-20 something whose spent a quarter of her life drowning, and is now finally able to keep her head above water most of the time. I’m very happy to have stumbled across your channel!
I love the 5 step tidying method. I would rename it the Pile method as you are putting things into piles then dealing with them. Step 1 - Gather each type of item into their own pile. Step 2 - Deal with each pile. I would also add in: The rubbish pile - also go through fridge and grab any out of date food to throw away. A Paperwork Shredding Pile - put items that need shredding in a pile on top of the shredder. My real achillese heel is paperwork / admin. I really wish I could get on top of it. I guess I will just have to come up with some pile categories eg file, bin, shred, deal with etc. Once you have a home (or pile) for everything, it then makes decluttering easy. You go through all your large "piles" where you store like with like eg: Your wardrobe Your sock drawer Your make-up box / drawer Your food cupboards Your Medicine Cabinet Your Junk Drawer Your box of IT cables Your Books Your stationary cupboard Your cleaning products etc etc etc
It sounds like you’ve really got this thought through. Cool! I’ll tell you what I do with paperwork. It works really well. When I bring in the mail, I stand over the garbage can and throw all of the junk away. I immediately pay the bills and destroy the paperwork, because you don’t need to save most of it. The only things that need to be saved are tax documents, warranties, insurance policies, etc. 99.5% of what comes into your home can go away. I have a little folder with pockets for each year and I file what I need to save in there and I do it right then. I learned to manage paperwork like this when I owned a company and it saved me. Hope that helps!
I have a problem with paper too. I own 2 small businesses and have a couple employees too. At one point I was buried in paper, because I didn't fully understand what it was I needed to do, it was a lot and I kept procrastinating, until one day I decided that I couldn't go on like this. I started with the shredding. I had many boxes with tax records, bankers boxes. It took me months to get through going through each box, taking staples out, recycling anything without sensitive information and shredding the rest. Clouds of paper dust were in my office, I had lots of plastic bags filled with shredded paper to take to the recycling bin, my shredder overheated periodically and shut itself off. Now I'm up to date with shredding and I no longer put piles on top of the shredder to be dealt with later, things get done right away. A big hang up with me is making decisions what to do with stuff from my past. I'm divorced and remarried and it still hurts thinking about the past. Last year I finally let go and shredded my divorce documents and other stuff, I can always get copies from the county should I ever need it, even though I can't see why I would ever need them again. I'm also forcing myself to create a habit of not letting things half done. Laundry would sit in the dryer for days...now I'm folding and hanging and in the end it feels GOOD. It's like a weight lifted off my subconscious mind. I still have a ton of postponed projects to do, but little by little I get them done. Declutterring along the way and I stopped shopping too.
@1whitecottagelife770 Wow! I’m so impressed. What a huge effort. I did a similar thing for years of paper from the small business I owned, but it only took a long afternoon because it was mostly digital. Way to go! I’ve learned to do that with my laundry too. It only takes a few minutes to fold it and put it away and it avoids the aggravation and weight I used to feel when the loads were piling up. You’re a good example. ❤️
I JUST TOLD ME HUSBAND YESTERDAY THAT I WISH I COULD KEEP THE HOUSE UP. I'm always SOOO tired. I have have had autoimmune the lady 3 years and that's made it worse. About 5 years ago I had a sleep study because of the exhaustion. I was diagnosed with mild sleep apnea AND mild narcolepsy. Both combined emerged. The dr said if I only had one then it wouldn't have made me feel the way I do. I lost about 28 lbs later and that helped briefly. I'm back to exhaustion and I have sleep issues. On the days I feel more energetic I will apply the information from this video❤❤
So sorry for your struggles. I understand the sentiments. When I have good days, it is a blessing to be able to clean the house. Other times, I can’t do it and just wish I could. We just have to be patient and kind to ourselves.
So glad I came upon you! This is just what I needed right now. Oprah says we compare our inside self to others outside selves. Which isn't helpful to anyone. You are a sweetheart. Thank you ❤
Thank you I needed this help and motivation ❤ it's really hard doing things around the House being a Single Mom with a Neurodivergent brain and having a son who also has a neurodivergent brain I focus on topical cleaning however I am more focused on my sons and my emotions and I also have two dogs but deep cleaning I lack I need to figure out a rhythm cause I always end up stuck but I'm always doing something but it doesn't look like I did anything it's very difficult I stay close to Jesus and my Bible 🙏❤️ it's also good to have human encouragement and grace ❤ I am ok being imperfect but everyone needs help I ordered this book on Audible and it is nice and Beautiful to come across your video and calming positive energy to give us healthy reminders on how to keep up with things around the home. I do go through phases of cleaning but not often I used to love to organize but once all responsibilities is on me everything in the home is hard to keep up with on my own. 😭🙏 it can be done and the Holy Spirit helps and it feels better when deep cleaning or any cleaning is done.
PLEASE LET ME HELP HERE! This is advice from big sis when I got married. You give yourself a time let's say 15 mins for a bedroom. It takes away moaning in your head and your mind is on the task and the timer. If you finish before timer goes off, keep going, look for things to do in that room. You'll find it was EASY!! Don't allow too much time as it brings the monies but adjust as necessary.
Another great video. You really impart some great ideas and make me realise that I'm not going bonkers . I really liked the idea of rhythm rather than routine. I have Fibromyalgia and heart failure. I'm 57 and live alone in a rented flat in Somerset in the UK. It's a small flat, but I still can't get it perfect. (There's that horrible word). I have this habit of spotting things that are not clean enough. They are always in those hard to reach places. I am always certain that if anyone comes round they look for them. It is all in the mind. How we think and how we then choose our actions makes a such a difference. We almost become conditioned by society about what is expected of us as women. Single, married etc. I look forward to more of your hints and tips.
Oh my… I’m so sorry you have these challenges. What a combination. Bless you! I’m glad the video helped. It’s true that perfectionism tends to get us. Why do we always see what we think we need to do instead of what we have done? Sometimes, I wonder how we got that way. It’s such a common problem for many of us. So happy you’re here!
Oh yes... we sure do. I think it's probably worse when we grow up with moms/grandmoms that seemed to have it all together and made it look easy. I try to remind myself how different my life is - and, well, I'm just generally a different person. It is pretty funny, come to think of it.
I just discovered you, but you sound like me. I have Autonomic Neuropathy, which causes me to literally get sick with activity. Used to be a good nurse, now I don't do anything, but listening to this gives me some hope.
This video came up on my recommendations, and I’m so glad it did. I love the concept of “care” over “chores”. To me, that means caring for my home (the place that gives me safety and peace), my things (that I chose, spent hard-earned money on, and want to look after), my health (a clean environment), and my wellbeing (clutter makes me feel overwhelmed and drops my mood). The shift to thinking of “caring” will help me determine what I don’t need (if I don’t want to care for it, I probably don’t need it), appreciate the things I do have (I know some things seemed very special when I bought them, but have now just become “stuff” amongst more “stuff” in my house), and turn housework I avoid into a way to honour the life and things I’m blessed to have. Thank you for a great video. I’m a new subscriber 😊
So glad you’re here! This is so well said that I’ve already re-read it several times. The part that stood out to me is “if I don’t want to care for it, I probably don’t need it.” That has opened the window for me decluttering some things I’ve been holding onto. Thanks!
I love the way you present this info! I keep a commonplace journal with all my favorite nuggets of wisdom. I had to pause your video sooo many times to write down your words so I could remember these “aha” moments. Im an ADHD diagnosed 34-year old woman who just had her 1st baby! Just what I needed in this moment.
I just emptied the last half of my dishwasher including putting away my utensils. I loaded a few dirty items and utensils. I am now absolutely exhausted and out of breath. I have no idea how I’m going to be able to get my apartment cleaned. It is trashed. I went through a long bout of depression this year and am still not completely recovered. I don’t have the money to hire anyone to help me. All I can do is a little bit at a time, but am so overwhelmed as there is so much to do. I have so little motivation that when I do get some, I need to get it done. But I get exhausted so quickly that I have to stop and take a break. Sometimes I can keep that little motivation. But most of the time after I am rested and can breathe better, I’ve lost the motivation. I feel like it will never get done and am so frustrated and hopeless. Somehow I have to keep trying. I barely have enough energy to fix a meal. So by the time I’m done, I have no energy left to clean up. It continues to get messier. It’s like trying to fill a bucket with water that has a hole in the bottom. I’m so tired. I’m sorry. I guess I needed to vent. Thank you for sharing the video. I did learn a few things. Have a good evening.
You go ahead and vent away. This is a safe place to do it because so many of us relate to your situation. Have you happened to see my video about pacing your energy with the DOTS method? It may help you understand what is happening to you and that it is CRITICAL to rest when you feel this way. Taking care of yourself will ultimately help you do more in the future. The video is called:Pace Your Energy Like a Pro with the DOTS Method You can find it here: th-cam.com/video/iVJCpAcilK0/w-d-xo.htmlsi=6iQeley3U7XZKKCN I hope that helps a little.
This is such a great post! I’ve learned a lot in the video and the comments. I’m so glad I found your channel (or it found me!) Your “killer dots” video is fantastic too. I have recently left an incredibly stressful career and the check ins and dots method is really helping me understand, & actually manage my burn out fatigue. I’ve begun to notice a pattern of “pushing through” then paying a price the next day. It’s been a revelation! Thank you for creating these videos, I really appreciate your unique content and your authentic approach to dealing with cognitive overwhelm 🙏
I listened to KC Davis's book back in 2022? I was actually going through a huge mental health breakdown. I was listening to it and i remember washing the dishes and just breaking down into tears. The huge relief and grace I was given to just be where I was.... helped A LOT. I have ADHD and have had anxiety and depression my entire life. I had a lot of my own tools that worked but they all were turned to ash once I got into a long term relationship and was living with someone else.. That made everything worse. I want to own a physical copy of her book when I get the money to do it.
I hope you can get one soon. There is something about having a physical copy of a book m that you can underline and mark and revisit that makes it so much easier to return to it. I hope things getting better for you soon. 🙏
Wow, I love your videos! You are like a good friend I can check in with and feel better! Keep making videos as you are able. You are making a difference in the lives of so many.😍
Thank you for sharing this book and how it is helpful in your life. I need some encouragement to get through my days and to help me manage my home. I also have fibromyalgia. My husband and I are empty nesters now that our 4 children are all on their own. You are so helpful and I appreciate your video content.
I have fibromyalgia, chronic Lyme, and chronic pain. I feel you completely. Fibromyalgia is no joke. The fatigue and body pain is so overwhelming. I maybe have an appt, do some laundry and I need to rest. Hard to get things done.
Thank you for making this video. I have been struggling with working a full time job and trying to force myself to do more work (chores) after work. I have filled my house with too many things and I am overwhelmed with trying to keep things picked up. I just can't seem to force myself to be motivated out of guilt/shame - the chore mentality. So, thank God for the radical mindshift of thinking in a different way - of focusing on "kindness" - as what would be kind for me to do -rather than the drudgery of forcing myself to do all my chores when I have had a full day. I get what you are saying in your message. We aren't meant to be perfect. Remember, Love is kind and patient!
You are so welcome. I really relate to much of what you have said. When I was still working full time, I just couldn't make myself do anything after work and so it was left to me doing whatever I could on the weekend. I was always, always, always behind. I wish I had read this book back then. I so appreciate hearing from you.
I can totally relate to your way of organizing! My problem is getting my kids to relate! Haha! Yes on the routine before children and pets now it’s all rhythm. Ugh Thanks for the video!
Oh yes.. kids. They do throw a wrench in things. And I can't seem to get out of that. We went from having grown up childen to having grown up children with children who live with us. I'm trying to relax and enjoy the experience because I know it won't last too long. (But sometimes, my age gets me!) Rhythm is everything.
this is the pep talk I needed today! my life is just messy, with kids who play outdoors (and track in dust and dirt), and big dogs and a farm full of animals. i will never have the perfect pinterest home. but i want a home that functions well, that is easy to pick up, and looks pretty enough. your tips are really great!
As a 62 yr old woman w/ADD, I can relate to your videos. I’ve decided to work less this year instead of retire(as a sub teacher) so I can start to tackle the overabundance of stuff in my house that needs addressing. Yesterday I begun with my shoes and the bottom of my closet. I can no longer wear heels (for 10+yrs) or shoes that don’t have arch support. I have over 50+ pairs of shoes that so many are practically brand new ready to go…..its a start…..and a beginning to a better life! Hubby has been retired for 4 yrs and has his routine, but I’m the one who has to plan the vacations if we are going to enjoy why we worked so hard for the first 40 yrs of our marriage for. Basically its up to me to get things done, and with a perfectionist brain it can be overwhelming. I’m glad your video popped up yesterday, I like your content and realism way to approach this stage. Kudos to many more!
So glad you found your way here! Did you know I used to be a school teacher too? Props to you for being a sub. I don’t know that I could do it. It sounds like you’re on your way. It is so satisfying to take a load of donations away. You’ll love it! 😍
This book is speaking my truth. I’m feeling this more than ever since I moved into my new home after several years of going through multiple defeats. Not to mention my mommy issues my whole life. Sigh….
Amen. I have several of those conditions and have learned to take rest when needed. The dishes are not going anywhere and it takes half the time when I am up to it. I am alone. If only my pets could sweep or wipe up their own messes 😂❤
Yep, that's what we have to do. I'm just coming off of a 5-day "rest." Could't be helped. I'll get myself down there at some point and rescue the kitchen. I wish our cat would vacuum our brown couch and that the collie would stop shedding all over the rug. Now that would be something!
Thanks for this video! ❤ I am going to read her book now. I smiled when you mentioned how some people tell you to fold underwear. My method for underwear: Wash, dry, put (toss) in the drawer. Done. As a recovering “perfectionist”, it was freeing to realize this is good enough! 😂
I need this message. The way I push myself to exhaustion trying to do all the things has landed me in the ER. Hit rock bottom multiple times because I could not see the way I was setting myself up for the opposite of success.
Oh my goodness. I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this. I relate to what you’ve said so much! Have you see my video about the DOTS method of managing energy? I was taught how to do it by my Cognitive Therapist when I was very sick with Long Covid and it has made such a huge difference to me. (I’m also the type that tends to push myself too hard.) I hope it helps you too! Look for the video with the thumbnail that talks about magical dots.
Used dishes show that people have been Fed. Doors are on cabinets for a reason. Can we easily find it? Then it's organized. I store most dry goods in large Ziploc containers because they use little space and I can easily see what's in them. They're reusable & if they get messed up it's no big deal. And I don't worry about lost lids. Thank you. You spoke to my heart
We all come from different backgrounds, and we learned to bully ourselves. It comes down to learning to stop. The good news is that we learned it and are now unlearning it. Self-abuse has payoffs, such as motivation, energy, etc., until it stops working for us. My perfectionism, backed by fear of judgment--mine. Who would you be if you were Not tidy? It's not about cleaning. If I am abusive to me, how will I treat you? Let's take a walk in the sunshine, defocus, look for a new path, take it. Cheers
I could have written this, I relate to it so much. There are various reasons I fell into that, but I'm grateful that I finally woke up to what I was doing to myself. I've been working on overcoming it for years. It's a process.
I’m so glad! It’s a process to lose the critical beds, especially if you grew up with it. I realized that I was carrying around what other people said and then I made it worse. Realizing that helped. I’m not as mean to myself as I was partially because I watch for it and then correct myself and restate the truth when I hear it (usually something like, “I’m doing well. Look how much I’m doing.” Glad to meet you!
I’m 64, married with two autistic adult sons I care for and have pain issues. I have more energy in the morning so that’s when I do most housework. I make to do lists and try to finish priority tasks first. Listening to favorite music while cleaning helps me mentally. I’ve started taking care of messes or issues in the moment instead of thinking I’ll do it later and then forget.
I’m best in the morning too. I have to do all of my housework, filming, research, planning in the morning, which usually means I have to spread them out because I can’t do everything on one day. I really lose my mojo in the afternoon. I’m trying to figure out if I can do something to fix that. It sounds like we have a few things in common. 😀
Thanks so much! I’ve pretty much overcome it, which is wonderful. I still have a few hangovers - some damage done, but overall, that part of my story is so much better. I see the EFY Tapping in your name. I used to do that and it helped me resolve some issues. You’ve just reminded me of it. Cool!
@@TowardsASimpleLife Ah, I see. You'll get there! I had a ton of damage done (lung damage, heart damage, neurological damage, etc.), and was almost entirely bedridden for a year and a half. It took me three years, but I fully recovered, and now I'm incredibly healthy, full of energy, and crushing it at the gym :) You can do this! Cheering for you from California. P.S. So glad you know EFT, and happy that I reminded you of it :)
My sister and I had to clean a hoarder’s house who would not allowed us to throw out anything. We were allowed to throw out trash, do dishes. Then we began to macro sort. We gave the hoarder small piles to make decisions on. After awhile the hoarder let go of more and more items. It took 3 months and then some. But social services wasn’t going to come in and condemn the place and have the hoarder removed.
Great video! I am so glad the Facebook algorithm brought you across my path. I have steroid dependent Adrenal Insufficiency and some days I am just to weak and ill to do much. Thanks for reinforcing the idea of grace and simplicity in managing the home. Needed this today!
Thanks! I’ll have to check that out. I heard her on the Mel Robbins podcast a few months ago. I realized it was her while reviewing the book. She was outstanding.
I have a very extremely different way to be productive it may not be at first, but it cumulates into something that is and is enjoyable. Never force yourself into things you don’t want to do. If there is something you really have to do or you won’t forgive yourself, then find a way to do it quickly or find a way to enjoy it. But mostly do the things that give you pleasure first, the things you actually love. Try to relax and enjoy them. The more you can relax the more productive you’ll be. You are probably most likely naturally either like to clean or enjoy some aspect of household duties if your reading this. If you enjoy the pleasures of life you will find inspiration in other places that will make you want to beautify something, clean something, or you might need a few days off to just relax and you have to try to work towards being okay with that if you ever want to enjoy what I am calling inspired cleaning, organizing and decorating. You might question me if this works, but tell me do you allow yourself to truly relax and enjoy what you really love?
I clean the bathroom every day, put on a load of laundry and clean the kitchen worktops and hob. Anything else can wait. Hygiene comes first. The energy suck for me is the vacuuming and moping so I leave it. Nobody dies. Sometimes I just sweep the kitchen with a soft broom. I hate vacuum cleaners. Dusting is very optional. Change one bed at a time on a weekly rota. Doing all of them on the same day is too much.
Wow - you're so efficient. I aspire to be that way. I have too many "fibro" days, but I do what I can. I agree that hygiene comes first. Vacuuming and mopping are my nemesis, too. I've had too many days when cleaning my floors have knocked me out of action. I just bought a mopping/autovac on Amazon. (It was inexpensive. I hope it works!) I'm praying that it keeps the floors clean enough that I will only have to deep clean them every now and again.
Your organization method reminds me of Cass that does the Clutterbug videos. There are 4 basic types of doing things. There is a test to determine what method is easy for you to do and maintain.
Hey - thanks so much for being here! Do you relate to what KC says? It makes so much sense to me. What do you think?
Best advice that has WORKED is; corral similar objects into containers (hairbrushhes), and SET A TIMER for 10 minutes and do the task for only ten minutes!
I like that!
@@TowardsASimpleLifeyour video made so much sense! Very freeing!
@Plethorality thanks!!
It has taken me awhile to realize that the household is only managed. It’s never completed. And that’s because we are alive. And that is a beautiful thing.
SO true! 👏👏👏
On days when I feel really weak, I just say to myself “ just go put 10 things in the dishwasher “. Or. “ just go clean one toilet”. Then I sit down and rest. Maybe twenty minutes later I can do 10 more dishes or put a load in the washer. I take tiny, baby steps and don’t beat myself up about it.
Sometimes, that’s exactly where I am. Those days always make me feel more grateful when I have better days.
@CynthiaMiller-cc3qj same here! Some days it's baby steps and I am glad that I managed that.
I do this too. Even do toilet in parts - toilet bowl, toilet seat, outside of toilet. Some days are hard.
Amen!
Me too x
That bedspread is GORGEOUS
Thanks! I really love it. It’s so cheerful.
Indeed!! I do quilting and these things never escape my eyes!!
Where did you get it?
@ellen375 I got it from Amazon. Here's a link: amzn.to/4697Ei4
I have CFS along with Fibromyalgia, a therapist said to me, “on a bad day when all you can do is stay under the duvet, you have 2 jobs you must do - one is breath in and one is breath out”. I felt so validated that a therapist recognised that there are bad days, it made me not only breath in and out but while under the duvet I would plan things I felt I could accomplish that day, I.e go to the toilet and also try to clean it while I was there, wash my hands and look at the sink and decide to spray it with cleaner so that the next time I went to the toilet I would clean the sink, but only if I could. In this way of tiny steps I could accomplish some things.
I love this! What a great therapist you have. I love how you have figured out how you can do things in pieces. I’m going to implement that during my own hard days. I think it will be very encouraging. Thanks!
I also have Fibromyalgia along with daily migraine. I do something similar. I try to never waste a step. Before leaving a room I will grab items that don't belong. Some days are so bad that I am only able to take the items so far. I know when I pass the items next time I can pick them up and take them farther. Another thing I do is while in the kitchen before I wah my hands I take care of trash, anything dirty that takes little effort. That way I'm not constantly washing my hands. When my kiddos were young I had them come see me after their chores before starting their homeschooling curriculum. I would either give them one quick chore I had noticed needing done or give them a number. The number, let's say I told them 10...that meant they needed to walk around the main floor and tidy up 10 things. I have 3 kiddos so this really helped. Loved the video!
@@user-km1rn7pd3l This is so smart! You’ve got a lot of wise processes figured out. 👏
TH-cam Adrenal Fatigue or CFS or fibromyalgia under Dr Berg, Dr. Eckberg and other natural/functional doctors on TH-cam and you will get some much-needed help outside of your regular medical doctors advice which is usually pharmaceutical drugs because that's how they are taught to manage illness whereas natural health doctors are taught to heal health conditions with foods, herbs, supplements and lifestyle changes. You will get so much more information from a functional doctor
@GameChanger597 thanks! I’ll check it out. 😀
I enjoy cleaning my house. I'm so thankful for all of the wonderful things I have and get to enjoy, and cleaning is a reminder to be grateful as I take care of my things 🙏 ❤
I love cleaning mine when I feel well enough. It is a blessing. 😀
Good for youuuu!! I love this💕
Annnd- you’re totally right. It’s a blessing to have a house to clean. Tfs 💕
yes I remember feeling this way too, but criticism from others bc overwhelmed with other responsibilities (very similar to the author of this book actually) made me really lose that joy
so sad actually to think of it, because I do love the perspective you shared🥰
So sorry you go through that sometimes. It takes work to get yourself to the point where you don’t care about it. I came with some baggage from growing up. I constantly heard things like “what will the neighbors think?” I’ve been detangling myself from that and from some of the overly critical demanding standards I lived with. One baby step at a time, right?
It used to bother me when I got behind on cleaning the house...One day a friend, who did certain cleaning things on specific days of the week, told me that if she didn't have time or get to it on that day, she didn't do it the next day, it would get done the next week on the designated day.... Later she also stated that if she didn't clean for 10 days it didn't mean she was 10 days behind pointing out that, for example, dusting the house would take the same amount of time if it was dusted daily or once every 10 days...it was a light bulb moment for me......I no longer feel the pressure I once felt b/c I was behind...I know I can clean my bathroom, including mopping the floors and the baseboards in 30 mins or less no matter how long it's been since I last cleaned it. Things like piled up laundry are a bit different b/c it piles up and the hamper overflows. And a filthy floor will take a little longer to clean than one that has a few days dirt..same for greasy stove tops...it's easier and quicker to wipe them up after each meal if you've used them. One thing I do is allot an amount of time to get a job done...if I don't I'll spend more time than is necessary to do it......working against the clock is a challenge and is energizing. If I'm really sick, I rest...there is very little that must be done housework wise that can't wait a day or two or three.
I quit hating cleaning when I reframed my thinking which changed my attitude toward cleaning. I'd always think/complain to myself "I have to clean'...I'd focus on that. Then I got cancer. And cleaning took the back seat..I was afraid and scared and oh how I wished that I didn't have cancer and was willing to do anything to survive it. And that's when I started saying to myself "oh goody, I get to clean the house today" or whatever the cleaning task was. Once I got well the words were kind of hollow b/c now everything was back to normal...But I kept on framing it that way. And guess what...I learned to love being able to do the chore. I found ways to make it easier, more efficient and even fun..Seriously. Gratefulness and thankfulness go along way...when we check our attitude it is often we will find we've got an attitude problem..a 'woe is me' problem. And that is when we start seeing ourselves as a victim. If we play the victim we will find ourselves in bondage. And we will stay in bondage until we realize it, reject the lies and confront ourselves. Every thought we have tends toward life or death. When we condemn ourselves, believing we are worthless, lazy, etc that's not from God...It's Satan who wants to destroy us. And once we realize that we become aware that what Christ said is true: As a man thinketh, in his heart so is he'. What we think reveals what we believe and when we change our thinking which changes what we believe, the process of doing that will transform us and all cleaning, chores, etc will become less burdensome. We'll still get tired, but we won't be stressed which is a whole lot better for our body.
There is so much wisdom in your comment! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences with us. I truly appreciate it. It’s such a good reminder of what’s most important.
I changed my attitude about cleaning by playing hymns and singing while doing housework. I also thank God for the beautiful dishes I have and how privileged I am to be the good steward of said items. At the very least set a timer for 15 minutes. I am a cancer survivor with a spinal condition so I struggle. Gratitude works wonders. ❤
@toots810usa6 I love this! It’s so true. Thanks for reminding us. 😀
@toots810usa6 love this! ❤️❤️❤️
So, so good. Thank you so much for sharing. 🤗
This book changed my life. I became disabled after my cancer diagnosis. I used to effortlessly keep a spotless house and then I stopped having both the energy and the physical strength to clean to that level. Focusing on keeping my spaces functional rather than spotless has improved my mental health as well as the functionality of my home.
It is a wonderful book, for sure! I enjoyed hearing how it helped you. I agree that keeping spaces functional is a good way to go!
❤ “slow, quiet and gentle” and looking at cleaning as being kind to yourself. Perfect take-away for me. Thank you!
You're so welcome! KC is so wise. I'm happy to pass it along. :-)
I do things now, so that Future Me can be grateful for the efforts Past Me put forth. I have thought before : " ohhh, I really don't want to fold my laundry right now, but I have the time right now, so I better just do it for the benefit of Future Me." Then, when the time comes, I go to my drawer and pull out clean, folded clothing and thank my Past Self for taking the time to care. It's really all just an act of self- care to myself- (past, present and future!!)❤☺️
This is so good! I love it. ❤️
@@TowardsASimpleLife Thank you!🥰 it really helps when I'm not feeling like doing it!(whatever 'it' may be!)🤭
We can do it!!!💪🫶
You're so jolly, down to earth, realistic and lovely. Not everyone grows up with wise older women to turn to, so channels like this are a real blessing. Thank you so much for sharing about KC Davies book, but also talking honestly about the fact sometimes these things are hard because they are hard, not because we are deficient.
What a wonderful thing to hear today. I appreciate your kindness very much. KC's book is great. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
New subscriber🙋🏾♀️
This content resonates with me. I'm a 58 y.o. neurodivergent who struggles to keep up with domestics. The *_only_* chore I do without fail is laundry because folding and putting away clean laundry gives me unfettered joy 😹
I love the term 'care tasks'.
Thank you for sharing this. It makes me feel better inside.🙏🏾
I'm so glad it has helped! It's cool that you have something that makes you feel that way. Doing laundry is nice for me because I enjoy knowing that I made life a little easier for my husband. :-)
This is the first video of yours I have seen. Somewhere during the first half of the video I thought to myself “This woman’s demeanor is so endearing. I wonder if she’s a believer?” Then you said you follow Christ and I thought “I knew it!” Thank you so much for these thoughts sister! I looked over your channel and have subscribed. I can’t wait to dive into more of your videos. ❤
Hi Becky! I'm delighted to meet you. Yes, I love Jesus Christ. He's my everything and I couldn't do life without him. I'm blessed that I know Him.
Amen ❤
I know I've commented before but simply have to say it again: It is so refreshing to hear the actual "truth" about maintaining the home for "real" people.
It is very demoralizing to click on one video after another looking for real solutions to our challenge, and getting another video saying how "this" system (regardless of which it is) is *the* solution and works for absolutely everyone since it is so adaptable and then goes on to make ridiculous claims.
Thanks so much. I’m glad you’re here! I’m so happy that the videos are helpful. That’s what I’ve been hoping for.
Also, listening to a 20 something or 30 something years old who lives in a new or newer home is not my reality. I'm 64 years old, still workinf a 40 hour week outside the house, living in a home built in 1920. Not as easy to clean!
@laurieme9611 This is so true. The younger girls are very talented, but are at such a different stage of life than we are. It’s so nice to hear from women who relate to my experience.
Perfect! Just what I needed to hear! And I had a light bulb moment! I went and put curtians over my pantry! That made me breathe easier!!
I’m so glad. And what a good idea to put curtains over your pantry! That would calm the environment down so much it would feel easier to be in it.
I am so grateful to have found your channel! Finally, what I have been dealing with for years is explained and addressed with helpful and meaningful steps to take to get on the other side of what has been a living hell for me and surely for others as well. If I tried to find all the words to tell you how much this means to me, I'd be in tears and a blubbering mess for rest of the morning but instead I'm getting up and going to do what I can today, and do my best not to compare myself to others, etc. I find I downplay A LOT and I am going to do my best to stop doing that to myself and apologizing. No one in my world truly gets it when I tell them my energy just STOPS all of a sudden, my brain is done and I can't do anything else for the rest of the day/evening. Constant interruptions, physically challenging tasks and chaotic drama or stress make it come on faster. The struggle is REAL!
You are a brave lady for sharing all of this, putting your own life's foibles and struggles out there to help others. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul! Subscribed!!
Thank you so much for sharing this with us! It means so much to me to hear that the video was helpful to you. It’s very encouraging to me. If you haven’t yet, I highly recommend that you watch last week’s DOT Method. In it, I share a method my cognitive therapist taught me to manage my energy so I can take better care of myself. One of the best benefits is that it has given me a language to communicate to my family how I am feeling that they can understand. They have become more supportive because everyone wants me to be in the “green” as much as possible and they know what’s helpful to me and what’s not. Take care of yourself. You deserve it!
Thank you! I did go watch the dots video and others you have. They are all very helpful!
Personalizing my Homemaking feels better than routines, though a master checklist of when I last did something would probably help with certain tasks. I 👍🏻 the self-care mindset 100%! Checking in with myself is so helpful! I like variety, visual serenity, cleared areas, and have more aspirations than time/energy to accomplish them, and am entranced with finding ways to design my home for less housework. Creating rhythms around how I like to operate = matching/coordinated bins and containers repurposed over nearly 3 decades, favoring laundry chores on a daily basis and folding by morning light, decluttering to decrease effort of the old stash and-dash, and massive simplification of eating to ketovore and focus on staying hydrated. Sometimes I indulge in folding socks and underwear, sometimes I don’t. Marie Kondo’s idea of dealing with ALL the things in a category works better for some things than others, and definitely NOT in the order that works for her! It is pleasant to do things that are purely aesthetic, when too tired to do other things 😁. I also enjoy a nice drive to a donation drop location for the same reason (but not in the raging heat of summer). My errand rhythms change with the seasons, for sure!
I love videos like yours, and the contributions of the commenters - I learn so much!
Being honest with myself about my ability to do the yard work is finally happening. Harder is accepting that I just don’t want to do it!!!
This is so very wonderful. You're doing so many things we can learn from and your attitude towards it and your life is inspiration to me. I'm grateful that you're here and have shared with us.
"Harder is accepting that I just don't want to do it!!!" I could have said that. :-)
I only make an ACCOMPLISHED list every day,write everything I did that day and I feel so much better than seeing what I hadn't.
Even on days I dont want to.before I know it I have quite a few listed.Walk away still feeling pretty good about what I had done😊
This is such a good idea. I can see it would be particularly helpful during those times when it is hard to do things and you start thinking you haven’t done a thing. But if you made a list like this, you’d probably surprise yourself at how much you’d done because we tend to overlook so many things. I think I’ll try doing this. Thanks!
I listen to this audiobook on Libby every few months. It's a short listen, but it's incredibly packed with helpful advice and it helps me feel more grounded every time.
I love this! It really is a wonderful book.
One thing I’ve gotten in the habit of doing is making a list of anything I need to do that day. From making the bed to taking my meds. Some days it may 5 small things and then some days more. But, I mark off items as I do them & it makes me feel accomplished. If I don’t get to it all I don’t beat myself up about it because sometimes life just gets in the way. Thank you for sharing your journey! You are amazing!
You have such a great attitude! I should make a little list like that. I did once, but got out of the habit. It does feel good checking off the items. I have to have tiny tasks on days when I'm not feeling good, but it would be good to notice that I'm doing them. Thanks!
I loved when you said that so many will tell you, "This system is great! If it's not working for you, then either you're not really doing it or there's something wrong with you.". I literally used to feel this way; I believed them and was convinced that there must be something wrong with me if "everyone" else seems to find this the solution to all the problems I was having but I just can't seem to hack it. Without going into detail, I just cannot, simply cannot, clean my entire house, floors, change linen, etc in one hour...yes, even if I try to do it superficially and only do the main areas of the floors. And I actually had someone who was doing a video series tell me, that if I am not really serious about this and don't really want to do it, then maybe I shouldn't watch her videos. She was right about only one part of that sentence, the ending!
I have to tell you my mouth about hit the floor when I read this. Wow. Just wow. I’m so sorry someone would say that to you!
....I am a former Professional Organizer/ Housekeeper....and I read your Comment, and I completely " got it " .... the other part of your Comment, about " cleaning your home in an hour " ...THAT is not attainable, even superficially... How does that seem reasonable...to " clean your house in an hour "? A more realistic approach is doing o n e room a day...depending on the amount that needs done. An hour to ckean the Bathroom.....still feeling ambitious.? .. Then do another small task.
I h a v e watched the several Creators that want us to believe that " Yes ! You CAN clean your Home in a hour !" ( she's well - known, I wont mention her Name ) ..I even Commented on that Channel, that I do not find that attainable, and it is a " stress creator "... I had to also ponder
"the w h y " when creating a Video wuth that kind of Content....it seems " not as encouraging as it is made out to be " ...if you understand my meaning. ..it seems dis- empowering in a sense. 🤔
Your sentence about being told that ' if you aren't really serious about this, and don't really want to do it ,then maybe you shouldn't be watching her Videos..." I WAS FLOORED. ..! WOW. I was shaking my head , since n o t every " system " being Shown Out Here in TH-cam Cleaning / De- clutter Land " is a One - size fits all Proposition " ...I've even stated as such in Comments, on Certain Channels... .. the whole " De- clutter Thing " has reached epidemic proportion... I'm not interested in getting rid of my Books.. my Hobby Items ... you get the idea. I don't believe one needs to be a Minimalist to have a clean, tidy Home..
Now, releasing things that you TRULY don't need, OR NEVER USE. ..that is a different thing .
When I watch a few of the Channels about all this .. I take it all with a Grain of Salt...because, we are all different. We need to understand " our own Rythmn " ...as she stated here in this Video. ..I have long subscribed to that " Rythmn " because it is beneficial...
That makes more sense than thinking you " are Less Than " after watching various " Cleaning Channels:. " that are telling you that you CAN do all the Homecaring ( that's my Term for it. Because you are Caring for your Home ) ..in an Hour ..That is nonsense.
I had This particular Video come up in my Feed and I decided to watch it and I am so glad I did. .....
This lovely woman is the voice of reason amidst all the " Cleaning and Decluttering Channels " that are way over the top ...and you know which ones I mean.....lol..
~Blessings 🙏🏻
@@TowardsASimpleLife...I loved your Reply to her Comment, I was floored as well, when I read that someone actuallystated that to her. ...; And trust me, I am older.I am Old School....I am not offended easily .. but that ....that seemed totally inappropriate to say that to a Viewer. !
And ,I am now a New Subscriber.
I love this so much! Thank you for adding your own voice of reason here. People need to see this. I’m so glad you found your way here!
@texasstardust6010 so glad!!
I have tried sooo many systems....I have found there are nuggets of value in them all but none are a perfect fit for me....I agree there needs to be embracing the good enough and that no matter what you do there will be times things are more chaotic than usual bc you're sick, tired, depressed, grieving, stressed, or distracted...at the moment things are mostly tidy and organized with a few ADHD piles of IDK what to do with this yet piles, and my floors are gross, and my back is still healing from an injury, so I'll dustmop most of the dog hair etc at some point today and mopping can wait. It's a constant dance for me, managing mental health and physical health and environment and tasks and errands, and maintaining relationships etc... the only effective way I've found is asking myself what am I up to doing right now? Sometimes that's a lot, sometimes it's not much, and either way has to be okay bc nothing is gained from beating myself down bc the laundry sat too long or the dishes didn't get done. Sometimes I have to love myself through a day of Netflix in my pajamas and try again tomorrow. Love to all in the struggle.🤗
I so relate to this!
Thank you so much for sharing this book! I was mentally nodding my head a lot as you talked about your takeaways. I am sorry that you are struggling with a chronic illness and yet you are turning that into lemonade with your TH-cam channel encouraging others that have life challenges. I am putting a hold at the library for this book. Just wish I had heard of it early but will consider this God’s perfect timing. I struggle with low energy without a diagnosis…I’ve tried several of those encourager’s books and apps and I do get discouraged that they haven’t worked for me. But I do a little here and there when I can. Thank you again for sharing your journey. ❤
So glad you heard it now! Have you seen last week’s video about the DOTS Method? In it, I teach the method that my cognitive therapist taught me for managing my energy and taking better care of myself. It has really helped me a lot. I hope it can help you too. It’s not the usual kind of thing you read about in books. I learned about it when I was seeing him for my Long Covid.
@@TowardsASimpleLife I will watch it. Thank you!
Hi, I think the only thing for me in the run through of jobs at the beginning of the video is, I put the laundry in the machine first as it is then working while I am doing something else. I am the same with the organised enough, there is a shelf or a basket for whatever and if it's there that's good enough. I knew one lady who, if someone was dropping in and she was short on time, do a quick tidy, if she needed to dust the obvious, then spray furniture polish in the room and it smells as if she was on top of things. Love her for that, and the honesty. Thanks for common sense approach, it's so much more like peoples real lives.
I do that with the laundry too. It’s the thing that helps me get it done, even during tough periods. You’ve shared some great ideas with us. Thanks!!
I want a self-cleaning house!
Me too!!
I recently heard that it's a good idea to be as organized as you need to be, but not MORE organized than you need to be. I thought that was interesting. Thanks...good video.
I agree - that is a good idea. Good one to remember, for sure.
Just found your channel and this is the best video I’ve seen in a long time! Thanks for keeping it real. Seriously!
I’m so happy that you enjoyed it. Thanks for saying hello!
It feels like the backlash against influencers is finally upon us. Thank you.
You’re welcome! ☺️
Your channel is an absolute God send.. thank you for maintaining this channel.
Oh, I’m so glad to hear this. I do a lot of praying that God will lead me to topics that will help others. He knows so much more than I do. I couldn’t do this without Him.
Neat thing about cleaning the junk drawer is reminding me of what is in there. Now I can remember where random things are. Junk drawers always get “Junked up” for me. I give up making a junk drawer looking nice.
I wish I enjoyed it like you do. That would be awesome!
I love your down to earth style and your realistic way of looking at things . I heard someone say once that being organized means “ you can find something when you need it”.. thank you for this video! I like your style!
Thank you so much! I’m so glad you’re enjoying my videos! 😀😀
What a great video! I don’t have a lot of time (or motivation) to read books like this, despite the often valuable advice, so being able to listen to someone go over the main themes of a book and share their thoughts and experience is exactly my cup of tea. Not to mention the fact that the themes discussed are so relevant to my life as a mid-20 something whose spent a quarter of her life drowning, and is now finally able to keep her head above water most of the time. I’m very happy to have stumbled across your channel!
I'm so glad you found me too! I love talking about helpful books, so it sounds like we'll get along just fine. :-) Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
I love the 5 step tidying method.
I would rename it the Pile method as you are putting things into piles then dealing with them.
Step 1 - Gather each type of item into their own pile.
Step 2 - Deal with each pile.
I would also add in:
The rubbish pile - also go through fridge and grab any out of date food to throw away.
A Paperwork Shredding Pile - put items that need shredding in a pile on top of the shredder.
My real achillese heel is paperwork / admin.
I really wish I could get on top of it.
I guess I will just have to come up with some pile categories eg file, bin, shred, deal with etc.
Once you have a home (or pile) for everything, it then makes decluttering easy.
You go through all your large "piles" where you store like with like eg:
Your wardrobe
Your sock drawer
Your make-up box / drawer
Your food cupboards
Your Medicine Cabinet
Your Junk Drawer
Your box of IT cables
Your Books
Your stationary cupboard
Your cleaning products
etc etc etc
It sounds like you’ve really got this thought through. Cool! I’ll tell you what I do with paperwork. It works really well. When I bring in the mail, I stand over the garbage can and throw all of the junk away. I immediately pay the bills and destroy the paperwork, because you don’t need to save most of it. The only things that need to be saved are tax documents, warranties, insurance policies, etc. 99.5% of what comes into your home can go away. I have a little folder with pockets for each year and I file what I need to save in there and I do it right then. I learned to manage paperwork like this when I owned a company and it saved me. Hope that helps!
I have a problem with paper too. I own 2 small businesses and have a couple employees too. At one point I was buried in paper, because I didn't fully understand what it was I needed to do, it was a lot and I kept procrastinating, until one day I decided that I couldn't go on like this. I started with the shredding. I had many boxes with tax records, bankers boxes. It took me months to get through going through each box, taking staples out, recycling anything without sensitive information and shredding the rest. Clouds of paper dust were in my office, I had lots of plastic bags filled with shredded paper to take to the recycling bin, my shredder overheated periodically and shut itself off. Now I'm up to date with shredding and I no longer put piles on top of the shredder to be dealt with later, things get done right away. A big hang up with me is making decisions what to do with stuff from my past. I'm divorced and remarried and it still hurts thinking about the past. Last year I finally let go and shredded my divorce documents and other stuff, I can always get copies from the county should I ever need it, even though I can't see why I would ever need them again. I'm also forcing myself to create a habit of not letting things half done. Laundry would sit in the dryer for days...now I'm folding and hanging and in the end it feels GOOD. It's like a weight lifted off my subconscious mind. I still have a ton of postponed projects to do, but little by little I get them done. Declutterring along the way and I stopped shopping too.
@1whitecottagelife770 Wow! I’m so impressed. What a huge effort. I did a similar thing for years of paper from the small business I owned, but it only took a long afternoon because it was mostly digital. Way to go! I’ve learned to do that with my laundry too. It only takes a few minutes to fold it and put it away and it avoids the aggravation and weight I used to feel when the loads were piling up. You’re a good example. ❤️
I JUST TOLD ME HUSBAND YESTERDAY THAT I WISH I COULD KEEP THE HOUSE UP. I'm always SOOO tired. I have have had autoimmune the lady 3 years and that's made it worse. About 5 years ago I had a sleep study because of the exhaustion. I was diagnosed with mild sleep apnea AND mild narcolepsy. Both combined emerged. The dr said if I only had one then it wouldn't have made me feel the way I do. I lost about 28 lbs later and that helped briefly. I'm back to exhaustion and I have sleep issues. On the days I feel more energetic I will apply the information from this video❤❤
So sorry for your struggles. I understand the sentiments. When I have good days, it is a blessing to be able to clean the house. Other times, I can’t do it and just wish I could. We just have to be patient and kind to ourselves.
I trained my kids to do chores from the age of about 6 or 7.
Wow! Has it payed off!
That is so awesome! My kids did chores for me when they were young, but I often wondered what was harder - doing it myself or making them do it. 😂
Thank you. You have actually made me feel normal, when I thought I was failing❤😊
I’m so glad it has been helpful to you. That makes me feel happy!
Oh, I also wanted to say your bedding is so beautiful! 😊
Thanks!!
May God bless you as you bless others.
Thank you so much. I appreciate that!
So glad I came upon you! This is just what I needed right now. Oprah says we compare our inside self to others outside selves. Which isn't helpful to anyone. You are a sweetheart. Thank you ❤
I’m so glad you found me too! 😀😀
Thank you I needed this help and motivation ❤ it's really hard doing things around the House being a Single Mom with a Neurodivergent brain and having a son who also has a neurodivergent brain I focus on topical cleaning however I am more focused on my sons and my emotions and I also have two dogs but deep cleaning I lack I need to figure out a rhythm cause I always end up stuck but I'm always doing something but it doesn't look like I did anything it's very difficult I stay close to Jesus and my Bible 🙏❤️ it's also good to have human encouragement and grace ❤ I am ok being imperfect but everyone needs help I ordered this book on Audible and it is nice and Beautiful to come across your video and calming positive energy to give us healthy reminders on how to keep up with things around the home. I do go through phases of cleaning but not often I used to love to organize but once all responsibilities is on me everything in the home is hard to keep up with on my own. 😭🙏 it can be done and the Holy Spirit helps and it feels better when deep cleaning or any cleaning is done.
You do have some tough challenges. I'm inspired by your determination to make the best of things and to keep trying. I'm so glad you're here!
PLEASE LET ME HELP HERE!
This is advice from big sis when I got married. You give yourself a time let's say 15 mins for a bedroom. It takes away moaning in your head and your mind is on the task and the timer. If you finish before timer goes off, keep going, look for things to do in that room. You'll find it was EASY!!
Don't allow too much time as it brings the monies but adjust as necessary.
I love this. I use a timer set to 30 minutes when I need it. It's very helpful.
Another great video. You really impart some great ideas and make me realise that I'm not going bonkers . I really liked the idea of rhythm rather than routine. I have Fibromyalgia and heart failure. I'm 57 and live alone in a rented flat in Somerset in the UK. It's a small flat, but I still can't get it perfect. (There's that horrible word). I have this habit of spotting things that are not clean enough. They are always in those hard to reach places. I am always certain that if anyone comes round they look for them. It is all in the mind. How we think and how we then choose our actions makes a such a difference. We almost become conditioned by society about what is expected of us as women. Single, married etc. I look forward to more of your hints and tips.
Oh my… I’m so sorry you have these challenges. What a combination. Bless you! I’m glad the video helped. It’s true that perfectionism tends to get us. Why do we always see what we think we need to do instead of what we have done? Sometimes, I wonder how we got that way. It’s such a common problem for many of us. So happy you’re here!
How we dramatise keeping house. Enjoyed the video, thank you. A good opportunity to laugh at ourselves. 🙂
Oh yes... we sure do. I think it's probably worse when we grow up with moms/grandmoms that seemed to have it all together and made it look easy. I try to remind myself how different my life is - and, well, I'm just generally a different person. It is pretty funny, come to think of it.
Enjoying your content, appreciate the effort you are putting into extracting the key points and sharing with us!
Thanks, Colleen. So glad you’re enjoying it! Have a great weekend!
I follow KC on tiktok. She is so sweet and honest and motivating.
She seems that way to me!
I just discovered you, but you sound like me. I have Autonomic Neuropathy, which causes me to literally get sick with activity. Used to be a good nurse, now I don't do anything, but listening to this gives me some hope.
You are so kind. Your comment really made me smile - big! Thanks so much for the encouragement.
Love your energy and approach. Subscribed! ❤
Thanks so much. It's so kind of you to tell me that and is very encouraging to me!
This video came up on my recommendations, and I’m so glad it did. I love the concept of “care” over “chores”. To me, that means caring for my home (the place that gives me safety and peace), my things (that I chose, spent hard-earned money on, and want to look after), my health (a clean environment), and my wellbeing (clutter makes me feel overwhelmed and drops my mood). The shift to thinking of “caring” will help me determine what I don’t need (if I don’t want to care for it, I probably don’t need it), appreciate the things I do have (I know some things seemed very special when I bought them, but have now just become “stuff” amongst more “stuff” in my house), and turn housework I avoid into a way to honour the life and things I’m blessed to have. Thank you for a great video. I’m a new subscriber 😊
So glad you’re here! This is so well said that I’ve already re-read it several times. The part that stood out to me is “if I don’t want to care for it, I probably don’t need it.” That has opened the window for me decluttering some things I’ve been holding onto. Thanks!
I love the way you present this info! I keep a commonplace journal with all my favorite nuggets of wisdom. I had to pause your video sooo many times to write down your words so I could remember these “aha” moments. Im an ADHD diagnosed 34-year old woman who just had her 1st baby! Just what I needed in this moment.
How cool is this?? I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed it so much! (And first baby? Congratulations!!)
I just ordered the book. Even watching your video required breaking it into several sessions. Normally, I would have watched 5 minutes and moved on. ❤
I'm glad it interested you enough to buy the book. It's a great spend!
best video ever on motivation for cleaning
Thanks for that. It's very encouraging to know that you enjoyed it so much!
I just emptied the last half of my dishwasher including putting away my utensils. I loaded a few dirty items and utensils. I am now absolutely exhausted and out of breath. I have no idea how I’m going to be able to get my apartment cleaned. It is trashed. I went through a long bout of depression this year and am still not completely recovered. I don’t have the money to hire anyone to help me. All I can do is a little bit at a time, but am so overwhelmed as there is so much to do. I have so little motivation that when I do get some, I need to get it done. But I get exhausted so quickly that I have to stop and take a break. Sometimes I can keep that little motivation. But most of the time after I am rested and can breathe better, I’ve lost the motivation. I feel like it will never get done and am so frustrated and hopeless. Somehow I have to keep trying. I barely have enough energy to fix a meal. So by the time I’m done, I have no energy left to clean up. It continues to get messier. It’s like trying to fill a bucket with water that has a hole in the bottom. I’m so tired. I’m sorry. I guess I needed to vent. Thank you for sharing the video. I did learn a few things. Have a good evening.
You go ahead and vent away. This is a safe place to do it because so many of us relate to your situation.
Have you happened to see my video about pacing your energy with the DOTS method? It may help you understand what is happening to you and that it is CRITICAL to rest when you feel this way. Taking care of yourself will ultimately help you do more in the future.
The video is called:Pace Your Energy Like a Pro with the DOTS Method
You can find it here: th-cam.com/video/iVJCpAcilK0/w-d-xo.htmlsi=6iQeley3U7XZKKCN
I hope that helps a little.
This is such a great post! I’ve learned a lot in the video and the comments. I’m so glad I found your channel (or it found me!) Your “killer dots” video is fantastic too. I have recently left an incredibly stressful career and the check ins and dots method is really helping me understand, & actually manage my burn out fatigue. I’ve begun to notice a pattern of “pushing through” then paying a price the next day. It’s been a revelation! Thank you for creating these videos, I really appreciate your unique content and your authentic approach to dealing with cognitive overwhelm 🙏
I’m so glad you’re here! I’m really glad the videos are helping you. They are helping me to make them.
Watching this again. It’s so, so good.
Thanks! I’m glad it was meaningful to you. I hope you have a wonderful week!
❤Love Everything about this!!! Love your Grace-filled approach!!!
That is so kind of you to say. I really appreciate it!
I listened to KC Davis's book back in 2022? I was actually going through a huge mental health breakdown. I was listening to it and i remember washing the dishes and just breaking down into tears. The huge relief and grace I was given to just be where I was.... helped A LOT. I have ADHD and have had anxiety and depression my entire life. I had a lot of my own tools that worked but they all were turned to ash once I got into a long term relationship and was living with someone else.. That made everything worse. I want to own a physical copy of her book when I get the money to do it.
I hope you can get one soon. There is something about having a physical copy of a book m that you can underline and mark and revisit that makes it so much easier to return to it. I hope things getting better for you soon. 🙏
Wow, I love your videos! You are like a good friend I can check in with and feel better! Keep making videos as you are able. You are making a difference in the lives of so many.😍
"I could show you some things that need to be cleaned..." I feel that.
Thank you, I will. Your support means a lot. Thanks for the encouragement!
@claudialupper Still true!
The minute Marie Kondo had toddlers she gave up on tidying herself!
Oh yes! I remember hearing about that now. 😀
Ours is like a herd of hyper monkeys.
This made me laugh so much. 🐒
That is 💯 true!!
I did 3 things marie kondo, my dish towel drawer, my panties folded, and my sock drawer. Maintaining it for 3 years now.
Thank you for sharing this book and how it is helpful in your life. I need some encouragement to get through my days and to help me manage my home. I also have fibromyalgia. My husband and I are empty nesters now that our 4 children are all on their own. You are so helpful and I appreciate your video content.
You’re so welcome! I’m glad to hear it was helpful. Fibro is a challenge, for sure.
I have fibromyalgia, chronic Lyme, and chronic pain. I feel you completely. Fibromyalgia is no joke. The fatigue and body pain is so overwhelming. I maybe have an appt, do some laundry and I need to rest. Hard to get things done.
@theresabrown1272 absolutely.
Very realistic mindset. Makes us feel like we aren’t alone! Thanks for being real. :)
You’re so welcome. I’m so glad you enjoyed it!
Thank you for making this video. I have been struggling with working a full time job and trying to force myself to do more work (chores) after work. I have filled my house with too many things and I am overwhelmed with trying to keep things picked up. I just can't seem to force myself to be motivated out of guilt/shame - the chore mentality. So, thank God for the radical mindshift of thinking in a different way - of focusing on "kindness" - as what would be kind for me to do -rather than the drudgery of forcing myself to do all my chores when I have had a full day. I get what you are saying in your message. We aren't meant to be perfect. Remember, Love is kind and patient!
You are so welcome. I really relate to much of what you have said. When I was still working full time, I just couldn't make myself do anything after work and so it was left to me doing whatever I could on the weekend. I was always, always, always behind. I wish I had read this book back then. I so appreciate hearing from you.
I can totally relate to your way of organizing! My problem is getting my kids to relate! Haha! Yes on the routine before children and pets now it’s all rhythm. Ugh Thanks for the video!
Oh yes.. kids. They do throw a wrench in things. And I can't seem to get out of that. We went from having grown up childen to having grown up children with children who live with us. I'm trying to relax and enjoy the experience because I know it won't last too long. (But sometimes, my age gets me!) Rhythm is everything.
this is the pep talk I needed today! my life is just messy, with kids who play outdoors (and track in dust and dirt), and big dogs and a farm full of animals. i will never have the perfect pinterest home. but i want a home that functions well, that is easy to pick up, and looks pretty enough. your tips are really great!
I’m so glad it helped! It sounds like you have a wonderful family. 😀
As a 62 yr old woman w/ADD, I can relate to your videos. I’ve decided to work less this year instead of retire(as a sub teacher) so I can start to tackle the overabundance of stuff in my house that needs addressing. Yesterday I begun with my shoes and the bottom of my closet. I can no longer wear heels (for 10+yrs) or shoes that don’t have arch support. I have over 50+ pairs of shoes that so many are practically brand new ready to go…..its a start…..and a beginning to a better life! Hubby has been retired for 4 yrs and has his routine, but I’m the one who has to plan the vacations if we are going to enjoy why we worked so hard for the first 40 yrs of our marriage for. Basically its up to me to get things done, and with a perfectionist brain it can be overwhelming. I’m glad your video popped up yesterday, I like your content and realism way to approach this stage. Kudos to many more!
So glad you found your way here! Did you know I used to be a school teacher too? Props to you for being a sub. I don’t know that I could do it. It sounds like you’re on your way. It is so satisfying to take a load of donations away. You’ll love it! 😍
Great perspective and support, thank you ❤ (Maureen, Scotland 🏴)
Glad you enjoyed it, Maureen!
This book is speaking my truth. I’m feeling this more than ever since I moved into my new home after several years of going through multiple defeats. Not to mention my mommy issues my whole life. Sigh….
I’m glad it is helpful to you. That’s wonderful! It has certainly helped me.
I call it "House Helps" but I like how you phrased it too. Same idea.❤❤❤ I may have to pick up that book.
House Helps is good! The book is too. ❤😀🌻
Amen. I have several of those conditions and have learned to take rest when needed. The dishes are not going anywhere and it takes half the time when I am up to it. I am alone. If only my pets could sweep or wipe up their own messes 😂❤
Yep, that's what we have to do. I'm just coming off of a 5-day "rest." Could't be helped. I'll get myself down there at some point and rescue the kitchen. I wish our cat would vacuum our brown couch and that the collie would stop shedding all over the rug. Now that would be something!
Thanks for this video! ❤ I am going to read her book now. I smiled when you mentioned how some people tell you to fold underwear. My method for underwear: Wash, dry, put (toss) in the drawer. Done. As a recovering “perfectionist”, it was freeing to realize this is good enough! 😂
I relate to this! Sometimes, just getting it into a drawer is a win! At least, that’s how it is for me. So glad you’re here. 😀
I need this message. The way I push myself to exhaustion trying to do all the things has landed me in the ER. Hit rock bottom multiple times because I could not see the way I was setting myself up for the opposite of success.
Oh my goodness. I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this. I relate to what you’ve said so much! Have you see my video about the DOTS method of managing energy? I was taught how to do it by my Cognitive Therapist when I was very sick with Long Covid and it has made such a huge difference to me. (I’m also the type that tends to push myself too hard.) I hope it helps you too! Look for the video with the thumbnail that talks about magical dots.
Used dishes show that people have been Fed. Doors are on cabinets for a reason. Can we easily find it? Then it's organized. I store most dry goods in large Ziploc containers because they use little space and I can easily see what's in them. They're reusable & if they get messed up it's no big deal. And I don't worry about lost lids. Thank you. You spoke to my heart
Amen! I really can’t understand the open shelves concepts (other than for decorating). What a disaster that would be for me. 😅
We all come from different backgrounds, and we learned to bully ourselves. It comes down to learning to stop. The good news is that we learned it and are now unlearning it. Self-abuse has payoffs, such as motivation, energy, etc., until it stops working for us. My perfectionism, backed by fear of judgment--mine. Who would you be if you were Not tidy? It's not about cleaning. If I am abusive to me, how will I treat you? Let's take a walk in the sunshine, defocus, look for a new path, take it. Cheers
I could have written this, I relate to it so much. There are various reasons I fell into that, but I'm grateful that I finally woke up to what I was doing to myself. I've been working on overcoming it for years. It's a process.
Thank you for sharing this with us/ this really helped me understand the importance of beating myself up and what the author says hit home with me
I’m so glad! It’s a process to lose the critical beds, especially if you grew up with it. I realized that I was carrying around what other people said and then I made it worse. Realizing that helped. I’m not as mean to myself as I was partially because I watch for it and then correct myself and restate the truth when I hear it (usually something like, “I’m doing well. Look how much I’m doing.” Glad to meet you!
Thank you, God bless you
You are so welcome and I appreciate the prayer. I could use them.
I’m 64, married with two autistic adult sons I care for and have pain issues. I have more energy in the morning so that’s when I do most housework. I make to do lists and try to finish priority tasks first. Listening to favorite music while cleaning helps me mentally. I’ve started taking care of messes or issues in the moment instead of thinking I’ll do it later and then forget.
I’m best in the morning too. I have to do all of my housework, filming, research, planning in the morning, which usually means I have to spread them out because I can’t do everything on one day. I really lose my mojo in the afternoon. I’m trying to figure out if I can do something to fix that. It sounds like we have a few things in common. 😀
May God bless you. You are an angel. I truly admire people who take care of disabled family...it is a life long mission.
I so love the direction of your channel now❤ it is all wonderful helpful information. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks Dusti. I’m really enjoying it!
I needed exactly this exacgly now. Bless you!
You are so very welcome!
Thanks for reminding me I REALLY need to read that book that is on my shelf already!
Yay! I had it for more than a year before I seriously read it. I guess it was finally time... :-)
This was brilliant! Thank you! Subscribed
Thanks so much! I'm glad you're here.
What a wonderful video. Thank you so much. And I'm so glad that you recovered from long COVID. Way to go!
Thanks so much! I’ve pretty much overcome it, which is wonderful. I still have a few hangovers - some damage done, but overall, that part of my story is so much better. I see the EFY Tapping in your name. I used to do that and it helped me resolve some issues. You’ve just reminded me of it. Cool!
@@TowardsASimpleLife Ah, I see. You'll get there! I had a ton of damage done (lung damage, heart damage, neurological damage, etc.), and was almost entirely bedridden for a year and a half. It took me three years, but I fully recovered, and now I'm incredibly healthy, full of energy, and crushing it at the gym :) You can do this! Cheering for you from California. P.S. So glad you know EFT, and happy that I reminded you of it :)
Great information. Thanks!
You’re so welcome! I appreciate hearing from you very much. 😊
My sister and I had to clean a hoarder’s house who would not allowed us to throw out anything. We were allowed to throw out trash, do dishes. Then we began to macro sort. We gave the hoarder small piles to make decisions on. After awhile the hoarder let go of more and more items. It took 3 months and then some. But social services wasn’t going to come in and condemn the place and have the hoarder removed.
Wow, you did such a kind service for this person. What a blessing you and your sister were in their lives!
New subscriber here. Great video. I laughed so hard when you were describing the "rainbow pantry organizing". I think you may be right there😂
Welcome!! I know what you mean. It is kind of funny when you think about it.🤪
This video was just what I needed.. Thankyou. Xx
So glad!
Great video! I am so glad the Facebook algorithm brought you across my path. I have steroid dependent Adrenal Insufficiency and some days I am just to weak and ill to do much. Thanks for reinforcing the idea of grace and simplicity in managing the home. Needed this today!
I’m so glad it brought you here too! I had no idea that this could even happen on Facebook. What a nice surprise!
Thank you!!!
You're so welcome!
GOD IS ALWAYS WITH ME
Amen!
I LOVE this book!
Me too!!
This was a great share! Thanks😁
You are so welcome
Strongly recommend an audio book!
She is on MANY TH-cams.
I appreciate hearing her talk, and as I work! (oe not)
:-)
Thanks! I’ll have to check that out. I heard her on the Mel Robbins podcast a few months ago. I realized it was her while reviewing the book. She was outstanding.
I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen any of your previous videos… I have bought the book through your link and subscribed! You’ve made my day. 😊
So glad you found me. Welcome! Hope you look around my channel to see if there are other videos you enjoy. You’ll love the book. It’s great!
I have a very extremely different way to be productive it may not be at first, but it cumulates into something that is and is enjoyable. Never force yourself into things you don’t want to do. If there is something you really have to do or you won’t forgive yourself, then find a way to do it quickly or find a way to enjoy it. But mostly do the things that give you pleasure first, the things you actually love. Try to relax and enjoy them. The more you can relax the more productive you’ll be. You are probably most likely naturally either like to clean or enjoy some aspect of household duties if your reading this. If you enjoy the pleasures of life you will find inspiration in other places that will make you want to beautify something, clean something, or you might need a few days off to just relax and you have to try to work towards being okay with that if you ever want to enjoy what I am calling inspired cleaning, organizing and decorating. You might question me if this works, but tell me do you allow yourself to truly relax and enjoy what you really love?
Very good advice Amy!
Hi! I appreciate the education you provide. It must take a lot of research and I want to tell you that it’s worth it, it’s very enlightening.
Thanks! This is very encouraging. I do put a lot of thought into the videos because I want them to be helpful. I’m glad you think they are!
Really great video!! Thank you!! ❤❤❤
You are so welcome! 😀
These videos have been so encouraging. Thank you
You are so welcome! I’m happy you’re here.
Very helpful video ❤
Glad you think so! It was so kind of you to tell me.
thank you very helpful
You’re so welcome! Thanks so much for watching.
I like you...I am glad I found your TH-cam page❤
I'm glad you found it too!
I clean the bathroom every day, put on a load of laundry and clean the kitchen worktops and hob. Anything else can wait. Hygiene comes first. The energy suck for me is the vacuuming and moping so I leave it. Nobody dies. Sometimes I just sweep the kitchen with a soft broom. I hate vacuum cleaners. Dusting is very optional. Change one bed at a time on a weekly rota. Doing all of them on the same day is too much.
Wow - you're so efficient. I aspire to be that way. I have too many "fibro" days, but I do what I can. I agree that hygiene comes first. Vacuuming and mopping are my nemesis, too. I've had too many days when cleaning my floors have knocked me out of action. I just bought a mopping/autovac on Amazon. (It was inexpensive. I hope it works!) I'm praying that it keeps the floors clean enough that I will only have to deep clean them every now and again.
Your organization method reminds me of Cass that does the Clutterbug videos. There are 4 basic types of doing things. There is a test to determine what method is easy for you to do and maintain.
Cass is very talented! I've got her book and am thinking about talking about it someday. She has a lot of cool ideas in it.